#ptsd and cptsd

[starfishinthedistance]

I talk to many people who say things like "oh I have trauma but I don't have PTSD", but then when I talk to them a little more I realize that they most likely do, they just can't recognize it as such due to how lacking PTSD awareness is, even beyond the whole "it's not just a veteran's disorder" thing.

The main reason they think they don't have PTSD usually has to do with flashbacks and nightmares, either they have one but not the other or have neither. But here's the thing, those are only two symptoms out of the 23-odd recognized symptoms. Flashbacks and nightmares are two of the five symptoms under Criterion B (Intrusion), which you only need one of for a diagnosis. The other three symptoms are unwanted upsetting memories, emotional distress after being reminded of trauma and physical reactivity after being reminded of trauma (i.e. shaking, sweating, heart racing, feeling sick, nauseous or faint, etc). Therefore you can have both flashbacks and nightmares, one but not the other, or neither and still have PTSD.

In fact, a lot of the reasons people give me for why they don't think they have PTSD are literally a part of the diagnostic criteria.

"Oh, I can barely remember most parts of my trauma anyway." Criterion D (Negative Alterations in Cognition and Mood) includes inability to recall key features of the trauma.

"Oh but I don't get upset about my trauma that often because I avoid thinking of it or being around things that remind me of it most of the time." Criterion C (Avoidance) includes avoiding trauma-related thoughts or feelings and avoiding trauma-related external reminders, and you literally cannot get diagnosed if you don't have at least one of those two symptoms.

"Oh I just have trouble getting to sleep or staying asleep, but I don't have nightmares." Criterion E (Alterations in Arousal and Reactivity) includes difficulting sleeping outside of nightmares.

"But I didn't have many/any trauma symptoms until a long time after the trauma happened." There's literally an entire specification for that.

Really it just shows how despite being one of the most well-known mental illnesses, people really don't know much about PTSD. If you have trauma, I ask you to at least look at the criteria before you decide you don't have PTSD. Hell, even if you don't have trauma, look at the criteria anyway because there are so many symptoms in there that just are not talked about.

PTSD awareness is not just about flashbacks and nightmares.

[transfaguette]

learning that constantly thinking about and analyzing and interpreting my traumas isn’t actually healing . and don’t get me wrong its made me a very effective communicator and emotionally intelligent person. but actually im supposed to be moving on and experiencing new things and happiness and stuff and not just compulsively reliving and recontextualizing the past. oops!

[aurangg]

Something really not talked about with trauma disorders is the paranoia.

Being scared and jumping to conclusions when people stand a little too close to you, not believing people’s compliments and thinking they have hidden motives, not believing when people tell you they like/love you, thinking that strangers you see on the street want to hurt you, etc.

[recoverr]

you're not a monster. you're you. you're flawed, yes, but you're also incredibly alive. just human. real. capable of great things, capable of change and growth, too. don't define yourself by the inner critic lashing out at you. you're not your worst moments.

[ed-recoverry]

To anyone who was suicidal at age 14 or younger, here’s your permission to grieve. Here’s your permission to not joke about it or just flat out ignore it. Here’s your permission to acknowledge that lost child who felt way more pain than any child should ever feel. You’re allowed to cry for that child, whether you healed or are still suffering the same thoughts. Finally allow yourself to grieve for that child filled with undeserved hurt.

[sage-hazeline]

how do you reconnect to life after being disconnected for so long

[android-boywife]

This is just gonna be me yelling into the void but!! peoples reactions to ‘baby reindeer’ are pissing me off and its so obvious they don’t understand CPSTD!!! ‘omg why did he try to relive his trauma’ ‘why did he go back to his groomer’ ‘hes a weirdo for getting off to his stalker’ these are all totally common reactions to sexual trauma!!! shakinf you by the shoulders.. saying shit like that is only reinforcing to the people who have experienced similar and related to that show that their trauma reactions are gross or make them stupid or a bad person. grooming and sexual trauma fuck you up real bad!!! its normal to act irrationally or in a way which makes the situation worse!! its common to try to re-experience it to try to take control! and its still! never! your! fault! screams!

[traumabody]

all i wanted in life was love and now i am terrified of it

[the-jesus-pill]

You’ve got to forgive yourself for being traumatized and needing to learn how to function again. 

Recovery isn’t always nightmares and depression, it’s forgetting to eat, being scared of what others might see as completely normal things, it’s getting random panic attacks, not knowing how to take care of yourself, not knowing how to live like an adult, even if you’re twenty, thirty, forty, fifty, of feeling like you’re failing to function in a world where everyone seems to have their shit together. 

If you need help, ask for it. Go to forums and ask for advice. Take advantage of community resources. Buy pre-sliced veggies and fruits, eat instant meals if you can’t cook for yourself today. Hire someone. Ask a neighbor for a favor. Buy any item you think might make life easier, even if you feel like you aren’t ‘disabled’ enough to have it. 

Some of the depression posts (ie open your windows, take a shower, go outside, call a friend) are really helpful but they’re not always enough. I’ve found advice for spoonies, people with chronic pain or other disabilities have the best tips because they know what it’s like to be bedridden, out of energy, stuck in a brain fog. 

You may never return back to the energy you had when you were younger and you might always need to use crutches to help you through life. It’s the same with medication. 

Trauma is a real thing that happens to you, it physically alters your brain and it’s alright to have lasting scars. 

You’re not broken, your life is not over and you can still be happy. 

It’s not your fault.

[love-me-love-my-weirdness]

Shout out to the people who never had a safe place. Who didn’t have a before trauma. Who were loved but not protected. Who were collateral damage in someone else’s breakdown. Who got fucked up so young that they’ll never know who they could have been.

Shout out to people who’ve never felt safe. I hope you do someday.

[youwillleaveme]

i can’t and shouldn’t have relationships, ever

[thelatestkate]

[mysterious-sludge]

Self-aware of my self-destruction, yet unable to stop myself.

[traumasurvivors]

If it’s possible, maybe try looking to who you’re going to be instead of getting stuck on trying to get back to who you were before the trauma.

Because trauma literally changes our brain chemistry. For most of us, we are forever changed. And that’s okay. It doesn’t make us less worthy or lovable or anything like that. But it can bring us down to be stuck on trying to be who we were before and often it is an impossible goal.

[ed-recoverry]

Reminder that abusers can be abusive by accident.

Reminder that abusers can genuinely, wholeheartedly believe that they are doing you a favor by abusing you.

Reminder that some abusers never apologize because they genuinely, wholeheartedly believe their abuse was for the better.

You’re allowed to know and acknowledge this and still be upset!

Explanation is not an excuse.

Some people abuse purely to cause a victim pain.

Others abuse for more complicated reasons.

But that doesn’t negate the fact that they abused you.

Even if there were aggravating circumstances, you are still allowed to still be mad at your abuser. You were not in control of their circumstances in their life and it was unfair you had to suffer the consequences.

Abuse is abuse, no matter the circumstances.

[biggest-gaudiest-patronuses]

anyone else have multiple traumatic memories associated specifically with holidays/family vacations? because that is a topic I never see discussed in all the So You Had A Shitty Childhood, Now What? self-help books i've been reading. but for me, it was a significant thing. and the more i think about it the more it seems like this would be an (unfortunately) common experience. would be grateful to hear if this matches other peoples' experiences...