#PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT

[goodgrlguides]

A Good Girl's Guide to Getting Over Childhood Abuse

Get over yourself and recognise where you are.

It sounds harsh but get over your emotions and realise where you are and how you got there. Operating and acting on your emotions will never get you anywhere. And you have to get over that. Get out a journal and write down everything that traumatized you from start to finish and burn it up. This is to show that you recognise where you are and choose to move forward from it.

Notice their wrongs and start doing it right.

One of the root causes of people who struggle with having healthy relationships generationally is because no one tries to fix it. Something that we have to realise is that nothing is ever going to change until you take it and decide to fix it. Choose what sort of life you want to live and make the decision that you are not going to screw up every relationship because of your trauma.

Being a person who has been in quite an abusive relationship with my parents, I had to make the choice that this is not the life I want to live or have my generations live either.

Never, ever numb yourself.

From what I've learned from all the years of being emotionally and mentally abused, there's a difference between numbing yourself and simply being unbothered by their comments. Do not numb yourself, no matter how bad it is. Instead, cultivate the mentality that their perception of you is a reflection of themselves. Take pity on that instead and don't waste important time worrying about it. Numbing yourself turns you into an unfeeling person which will not better you into becoming the best version of yourself.

Take the chance to learn and better yourself.

My last post describes the perfect woman, which is what we should aim to be. This sort of woman is one that will make your abuser see that whatever they did to you was worthless. Rather than taking revenge into your own hands and ruining them with your words, make them regret it by becoming the most you can be. Using your words against them will lead to nothing at the end of it all and it makes you as bad of a person as they are, so remember, the best revenge is becoming more than they could ever be and more than what they limited you to be.

As always, it was a pleasure having you and remember: Be a good girl.

XOXO, Good Girl Guides.

[lilydrafts]

A toxic environment will likely change you more than you change it. So get out.

[girlwithrituals]

GLOW UP GUIDE FOR 2025⠀

READ: On average, it takes more than 2 months before a new behavior becomes automatic — 66 days to be exact. And considering that 2025 is precisely these many days away, why not start with our glow up plan already?

Physical Glow Up-

BODY

— 5-10K steps a day.

— 7-8 hours of sleep.

— workout everyday for 1 hr atleast- yoga/stretching/pilates/cardio. a workout may take one hour, but your mood will be boosted for the next 12 hours.

— posture training.

— sunlight exposure after waking up for at least 10 minutes.

NUTRITION

— 2-3 liters of water every day.

— limit your caffeine intake.

— avoid sugars as much as you can.

— high protein diet, pre and probiotics.

— more fruits and veggies (+ green smoothies if you like).

— no junk/processed food/trans fat.

— no eating after 8 pm.

SKINCARE

— be clear on your skin type (oily, dry, combination, sensitive).

— once you're clear, use these accordingly- cleanser, toner, targeted serum, eye cream, moisturizer, sunscreen (≥50 spf).

— keep your bedding clean as well.

— no picking of skin on your lips, cuticle etc.

— gua sha to help improve blood circulation and lessen toxins.

— cold therapy may take three to five minutes of being uncomfortable, but your energy levels will be boosted for the rest of the day.

— remove makeup before you go to bed.

BODY CARE

— shower every day.

— exfoliate 2x a week.

— use body lotion (shea butter/aloe vera gel/coconut oil).

HAIR CARE

— wash hair 2-3x a week

— oil your scalp 2x a week, at least 3 hours before shampoo.

— hair mask 1x per week.

— never brush wet hair.

— use silk pillow case.

HYGIENE

— brush your teeth 2x a day, clean tongue and the roof of the mouth daily.

— floss daily.

— cut your nails 1x a week, never remove the cuticles.

— glycolic acid under arm for odor and discoloration.

— never use soap on your coochie.

Mental Glow Up-

MINDSET

— set clear goals- define and breakdown your aspirations.

— start your mornings with positive affirmations.

— surround yourself with uplifting content and people.

— be shamelessly selfish to your career and mental health, remove anyone or anything that doesn't align with your priorities and wellbeing.

— boost your brain health by these 4 neuroscience tools:

difficult first: start your day with the most difficult task (cortisol and dopamine are high in the body meaning that your body/mind is primed to work).

rest your eyes: introduce a micro-pause after learning by resting/closing your eyes - will help retain information better.

tomorrow's worries: write tomorrow's to-do list before bed as it is proven to be effective in helping you fall asleep.

find time to play: engage in low-stake play. can be anything you find fun but where the outcome doesn't matter (induces neuroplasticity + reduces stress).

MIND

— meditation might take as low as ten minutes, but your focus will be improved for the rest of the day.

— no social media after waking up and at least an hour before bed.

— keep aside 1 hr of time to read daily! reading a new book may take five hours, but you will keep the knowledge forever.

— journaling, gratitude.

— digital detox once a week or for 12 hours.

— limit unnecessary screentime, unfollow or cut off people you don't want to see.

JOURNALING

— choose a regular time each day to journal, making it a part of your routine.

— find a quiet, comfortable place free from distractions. light a candle if you want.

— allow your thoughts to flow without censoring or editing.

— write about your feelings and emotions to understand them better. write about things you are thankful for to boost your mood. write about your short-term and long-term goals. identify what triggers certain emotions or reactions

— set a timer for 5-10 minutes and write continuously during that time.

— reflect on both positive experiences and challenges.

— make lists, journal your thoughts on these questions.

— journal at night to clear your mind before bedtime, because emotions and thoughts lose their power once we acknowledge them.

— a gratitude practice may take five minutes, but your mindset will be shifted for the rest of the day.

AFFIRMATIONS

— customise affirmations to your needs.

Personal Life-

WEEKLY TASKS

— initiate small changes: begin with small, manageable tasks such as making your bed or cleaning your room every sunday.

— celebrate your success: reward yourself when you achieve your goals or have a consistently productive week. consider treats like buying flowers for yourself or watching your favorite show.

DAILY WORK

— set achievable goals: establish realistic goals for the day, week, or month ahead.

— track your progress.

— organise your work space, declutter your shelves etc.

— embrace the power of lists: keep a list of tasks to be done and their deadlines. this way, you start each day with a clear plan. to make it visually appealing and motivating, consider using productivity apps like evernote, habit tracker, or notion.

PRODUCTIVITY TIPS

— wake up early.

— plan ahead everything, do scheduling. you can use:

google calendar / notion / tasks .

— if the task takes less than 2 minutes to finish, do it immediately.

— countdown rule, if you are procrastinating, count 1-2-3-4-5 and jump.

— start slow, don't rush and try to do everything at one time.

— follow a proper routine, use app locks based on screentime.

— pomodoro technique, 25 min work, and 5 min break.

— schedule longer break times as well e.g 30 min nap.

[blissfullyecho]

2025 Vision 🖤🍸🪩

[theambitiouswoman]

Green Flags in Communication 💚💬

"I want to know when I hurt your feelings."

This shows they are willing to understand and acknowledge the impact of their actions.

"I don't want you to feel alone in this."

This shows empathy and indicates that the person is supportive and does not want the person to deal with issues alone.

"I've been struggling with ___”

This demonstrates vulnerability and trust, as the person is open about their struggles.

"How have you been feeling about ___? I know it's been on your mind a lot."

This shows concern for the other person's issues or worries, showing that they are listening and care about what's important to the other person.

"I feel __ when you __; are you open to trying __ next time?"

This is an example of constructive communication.

"What do you need from me when this happens with your family?"

This shows awareness and sensitivity to the persons family dynamics and a willingness to provide support.

"I appreciate when you ___.”

Expressing appreciation is vital for positive reinforcement and acknowledging the efforts and qualities of the other person.

"I didn't handle that well."

This is a sign of self-awareness and accountability, recognizing one's own mistakes and being open to learning and growth.

"I'm sorry, I was wrong to say that. I'll try to be more mindful in the future."

Shows you are able to apologize genuinely and a commitment to improving behavior.

"Tell me more about that; I'm really interested in hearing your perspective."

Indicates a genuine interest in the other person's thoughts and feelings.

"I noticed you seemed a bit off today. Is everything okay?"

It shows you are attentive to the other person's emotional state and a readiness to provide support.

"I'm here for you, no matter what you need."

Offers unconditional support, creating a sense of security in the relationship.

"I love how passionate you are about your hobbies. It's inspiring to see."

Expresses admiration for the other person's interests.

"Let's work on a solution together. What do you think would be fair?"

Focusing on collaboration rather than conflict.

"I trust your judgment on this."

Trust and respect for the other person's decision-making abilities.

"Your happiness is important to me. Let's make sure you're taking time for yourself."

Prioritizes the other person's happiness and emphasizes the importance of self care.

"It's okay to feel that way. Do you want to talk about it more?"

Validates the other person's feelings.

"I appreciate how you handled that situation. You're really good at ___."

Praises specific strengths or skills, boosting the other person's self-esteem.

"I know we disagree, but I respect your point of view."

Acknowledges differences in opinion while still maintaining respect and understanding.

[svdaily]

Stop letting other people tell you who you are.

[nenelonomh]

of course everything is falling apart, your new life will cost you your old one

[a-1mond]

[happytakes]

2024.08.12 | If you're confused, reflect on your self and work on improving yourself first. It will help equip you for the opportunities that will open up for you moving forward.

[honeytonedhottie]

thewizardliz's mindset⋆.ೃ࿔*:･⭐️

her conception of self ; she has high standards for herself because she knows her worth. because of that she won't settle and she doesn't let herself get walked all over.

something that liz has said in her videos before was to be okay with people misunderstanding you. dont go out of ur way to get worked up just bcuz someone sees something in a different way then u do.

her conception of self continued ; in another video she says to "make a list of tough situations that you've handled in the past and what skills you used to handle them". she has a lot of trust and belief in herself and her abilities

she often stresses the importance of prioritizing urself, ur boundaries and ur healing above all else. but you know what she doesn't stress? the opinions of others.

going about business ; liz is all about standing on business and taking ACTION for ur goals. in one of her videos she talks about "if u dont like urself, simply create a new version of urself". she says that through action, you can create the life of ur dreams.

connection with self ; liz says to not crave the compliments of others but instead, to compliment yourself. everything that u need is within you. shes a big advocate for shadow work and therapy to help understand yourself and heal on a deeper level.

she not only connects with the present self, she also connects with who she wants to be. a saying of hers is "what would the highest version of myself do". she detaches herself to things or people because they are temporary, but her relationship with self is forever.

[in-tenebris-et-in-solitudine]

[lilydrafts]

Sometimes you have to accept that the person you fall for isn't ready to catch you.

[girlwithrituals]

20 NIGHT JOURNAL PROMPTS TO CLEAR YOUR MIND BEFORE BEDTIME

1. what's on my mind right now?

2. how am i feeling right now?

3. write down one word to describe my day (calm or hectic, productive or unproductive, etc.) and write a sentence about it (today was calm because i did my morning routine and that helped me stay in the present moment)

4. what am i grateful for today?

5. emotions i felt today include...

6. what did i do today to make myself proud?

7. what did i learn about myself today?

8. what is something I accomplished today, big or small, and how did it make me feel?

9. something that bothered me today was...

10. how did I handle any stress or anxiety that came up today?

11. have i done anything to make someone else happy today?

12. write one thing that made me feel loved today.

13. what do i want to take from today into tomorrow?

14. what's my word for tomorrow?

15. what would i like tomorrow to bring me?

16. if i could change one thing about my behavior today, what would it be?

17. what is a meaningful conversation I had today and why did it stand out?

18. what are my top three priorities for tomorrow?

19. what's one thing I can do to improve tomorrow based on today's experiences?

20. how do i want to feel when i wake up tomorrow morning?

[blissfullyecho]

Become Your Dream Girl in 2025

Defining your dream girl persona

The first step into becoming your dream girl is to have a clear picture of her in your mind. Imagine her life in detail; her aesthetic, her habits, and even her energy. This is the time to get specific.

Visualization Exercise: Sit in a quiet space, close your eyes, and visualize your dream girl persona. How does she dress? What places does she visit? What are her priorities and goals? Let yourself feel her confidence, luxury, and elegance.

Create a Vision Board: Gather photos, quotes, fabrics, and colors that represent this version of you. A physical board can go in your room or closet. It can even be a mini collage you can put on your driver's side mirror in your car. The goal is to see your dream girl's life as real and achievable.

Setting New Year Goals

Your dream girl's life needs structure, so let's break down goals into categories and map out the steps to make it happen.

Categorize Your Goals: List your goals under personal growth, style & beauty, health & wellness, and career & financial. For example, under "Health & Wellness", you might set a goal to try Pilates or to cook more at home.

Monthly Check-Ins: As you go through the year, check in with your goals to celebrate your wins, and adjust as needed. This keeps your transformation on track.

Mindset Makeover

Confidence & Self-Worth

Your dream girl is confident, magnetic, and knows her worth. Let's build those habits and thoughts that help you embody that energy daily.

Positive Affirmations: Every time you look in the mirror, say things like "I am worth everything good that can happen to me" or any affirmation that you feel suits you best.

Confidence Rituals: Small, daily actions add up to huge shifts in confidence. Make it a habit to dress up on casual days, speak kindly to yourself, and embrace good posture.

Let Go of Insecurities: Identify any insecurities and practice reframing them. Instead of "I wish I was more confident", say "I am becoming more confident every day". Over time, you'll notice how these subtle shifts impact your self-worth.

Mindset for Success

Your dream girl is resilient and always growing, so let's make success part of your mindset.

Growth Mindset: View challenges as chances to learn, whether it's a career move, a new hobby, or even a social situation.

Visualizing Success: Each morning, spend a few minutes visualizing yourself living your dream life. This will keep you focused and motivated.

Morning & Evening Routines: Start each day with intention by setting small goals and expressing gratitude. At night, reflect on the day and celebrate your wins; even the small ones.

Social Life & Relationships

Social confidence comes from feeling at ease in your own skin.

Elegant Etiquette: Show appreciation with thank you notes, and make an effort to remember names. The vibe for 2025 is to go for traditional, rather than modern. Think classic early 1920's-1950's Hollywood.

Curate Your Circle: Surround yourself with supportive, inspiring friends who uplift you. Leave the ones who don't elevate themselves or try to keep you behind.

Networking Lifestyle: Turn social gatherings into chances to meet like-minded people and to elevate your circle.

(Dating) Standards First: Don't settle; know what you deserve in a partner and communicate it confidently.

(Dating) Playful Energy: Be confident, flirty, and assertive (with yourself, not them). Stay in your feminine energy and let them earn your time and attention.

(Dating) Relationship Goals: Keep dates special and playful. Dress up, go out, and enjoy yourself.

Finances & Career Goals

Your dream girl values luxury, but also financial security. Your career is part of your dream girl identity, so elevate it.

Budgeting: Set aside money for luxuries and self-investment, but keep savings in mind.

Multiple Income Streams: Consider side hustles that align with your lifestyle.

Savings Goals: Whether it's for a designer bag, a trip, or just building wealth, make sure your goals are concrete.

Luxury Workspace: Make your workspace a vibe with candles, flowers, and chic decor.

Network for Success: Connect with mentors and people who inspire you.

Grow with Intention: Set milestones in your career or business, and keep pushing for the next level.

Health & Wellness

Your body is the vessel of your dream girl, so let's treat it with love and care. Mental clarity and peace are essential for dream girl energy; so let's focus on overall wellness this year.

Exercise: Try Pilates or Barre classes for a toned, elegant look. If that's not your thing, find workouts that create your dream body.

Healthy Eating: Focus on whole foods, lots of veggies, and drink tons of water.

Weekly Reset: Plan a mini detox day where you relax, hydrate, and reset for the week.

Mindfulness Practice: Try a short meditation or breathing exercise every morning.

Stress Relief: Whether it's a quick walk, journaling, or a creative outlet, find a stress relief that's all you.

Boundaries: Say no when needed, and make sure your energy is protected.

Beauty & Style Upgrade

First, a dream girl has that glow, and it all starts with a skincare routine that feels luxurious. You also need to find a style that captures your dream girl vibe, and commit to curating it. Then, you need to develop habits that will help you better your appearance.

Simple Skincare Routine (For Starters): Start with a cleanser for your skin type, followed by a hydrating toner, a serum (like Vitamin C for brightness), moisturizer, and SPF.

Luxury Treatments: Invest in facials or try gentle at-home treatments like dermaplaning once a month for an extra glow.

Nightly Routine: Keep your skin hydrated at night with a heavier moisturizer or an overnight mask.

Personal Style Icons: Think of someone like Serena van der Woodsen from Gossip Girl or a high-fashion model off-duty.

Curating Your Wardrobe: Focus on high-quality staples in neutral tones, like blazers, silky blouses, and tailored bottoms. Invest in timeless pieces that make you feel like a billion dollars.

Signature Look: A dream girl has her thing, whether it's an accessory, a makeup look, or a scent. Find what makes you feel like you and stick with it.

Self-Care Rituals: Prioritize manicures and pedicures, hair masks, and bubble baths. Set aside time every week to pamper yourself.

Polished Look: Even on your most casual days, aim to look put together.

Signature Hair & Makeup: Pick a go-to glam look that embodies your dream girl; maybe that's glossy lips and loose waves (for example).

Lifestyle & Daily Habits

Your routine should feel luxurious yet practical, setting the tone for each day. Small daily habits can transform how you feel and present yourself.

Weekly Pamper Sessions: Set aside Sunday evenings for facials, skincare, and champagne baths! (Be careful and make sure you're of legal drinking age)

Journaling and Reflection: Each morning, write down 3 things you're grateful for and 3 intentions for the day.

Goal Reviews: Every Sunday, celebrate your wins and see if any goals need a refresh.

The Basic Routine: Make your bed, wake up early, and put on an outfit that feels like you.

Energy-Boosting Habits: A quick stretch, a healthy breakfast, and a moment of quiet can make a huge difference.

Wind-Down Ritual: At night, unwind with tea, a bubble bath, or a short meditation to recharge for tomorrow.

Indulge a Little: Get a weekly coffee treat or a luxurious candle that makes your space feel cozy.

Luxury Experiences: Plan for a special outing every month, like a fancy dinner or spa day.

Signature Scents and Cocktails: Find your go-to perfume and a signature drink like a dirty martini or a bubbly glass of champagne.

Conclusion:

Becoming your dream girl is a journey; one that's glamorous, fulfilling, and full of growth. Each step brings you closer to living the life you deserve.

[theambitiouswoman]

40 Tips For Becoming More Disciplined 📌💡🚀📝

Know what you want to achieve soon and in the future. This helps you know where to go and stay motivated.

Do the most important things first to save time and energy.

Have a daily plan that includes work, rest, exercise, and learning.

Make big tasks smaller so they're not scary, and you can see progress.

Use methods like the Pomodoro Technique (working for a while, then resting) or blocking time to get more done.

Notice when you're avoiding work and make yourself start.

Control yourself from getting distracted or doing things just for fun.

Say no politely when you can't do more things without getting stressed.

Stay healthy by eating well, exercising, and sleeping enough.

Keep learning by reading, taking classes, or trying new things.

Check how you're doing with your goals and change plans if needed.

Tell a friend or mentor your goals so they can help you stay on track.

Keep your spaces tidy to help you focus better.

Learning discipline takes time, and it's okay if things don't go perfectly.

Think good thoughts about yourself instead of bad ones.

Imagine doing well to get motivated.

Mistakes are chances to learn, not reasons to give up.

Be happy about even small successes to stay positive.

Listen to advice from others to get better.

Be ready to change your plans but keep your main goals.

Try mindfulness to concentrate, be calm, and know yourself better.

Write about your progress and plans in a journal.

Turn off things like social media when you work or study.

Think about things you're thankful for to stay happy.

Do quick tasks right away instead of waiting.

Spend time with people who help you and make you want to be better.

Let others do tasks that you don't need to do, so you can focus.

Get better at handling problems without giving up.

Picture doing well to stay motivated.

Drink water to think clearly and stay healthy.

Have a special place to work or study to help you focus.

Wait for bigger rewards instead of quick ones.

Keep things simple, both around you and in your mind, so you can concentrate.

Listen to advice without feeling bad about yourself.

Use apps and tools to manage your tasks and time.

Reading helps you learn and think better.

Decide what's good enough for you and stick to it.

Believe you can get smarter and better with practice.

Do creative things to stay imaginative and interested.

Listen carefully to others to be better at talking and understanding.