#just give him batkids already

[ryemiffie]

I love imagining the scenario where one of Bruce's kids is getting married but no one knows Bruce's identity and it creates shenanigans. Like for example, Dick is marrying Starfire and she doesn't know Bruce's identity.

And they of course want Bruce at the wedding since he's Dick's dad, but they also want a hero as security due to the nature of the wedding, not only as a wedding between two heroes but also a Wayne wedding (not to mention holding a wedding like that in gotham is never easy) which is a pretty big deal in both respects and garners a lot of attention to be the perfect opportunity for a villian attack. So Starfire and Dick decide to request a justice league member there as security. Some heroes are eliminated due to them already being meant to attend as guests who are meant to be able to enjoy the wedding and some already have missions that need their attention, like Wonder Woman, Aquaman, and the Martian Manhunter are busy off-world, Shazam and HawkGirl are busy with a villian who's been on the run, and Superman is supposed to be doing press for the wedding as Clark, so they decide to give the task to Batman seeing as he's more than qualified and is already accustomed to the area (gotham), he can't figure out a way to decline the mission without risking his identity being leaked since he really has no reason to not be able to do it, except of course saying he has civilian business, on the day of the wedding, at the exact time of the wedding.. yeah hell no, Batman is way to paranoid to say something like that! So he agrees to do security as Batman for the wedding while also agreeing to attend the wedding as Bruce, ya' know, so people don't suspect anything about his identity due to the situation.

And before you ask yes Dick has realised the situation but no he is not helping Bruce out of it because its fucking funny to him, and none of the other batkids agree to where the suit for the day since they're also guests and they also find the situation funny as hell. So cue Bruce trying to constantly switch between making appearances as Bruce and doing security as Batman, like the classic sitcom episode where the person has to constantly switch between one date to the next, but it's Batman just trying to enjoy his kid's wedding.

[haveihitanerve]

Okay but hear me out- the batkids as actual Vampires. Not bruce, just the kids, and bruce providing for them. Because he just has the tastiest blood.

Little Dick toddling over to Bruce, tears in his eyes because he ate his bloody dinner too fast and hes still hungry and Bruce just sighing and sticking out his hand and Dick lights up and they watch a movie while dick is happily gnawing on Bruce’s thumb and sucking his blood. Big Dick complains very loudly about how hungry he is and Bruce will glower at him before finally giving in and throwing an arm around his eldests shoulders and Dick pecks his cheek with a sweet “thank you dad.” before sinking his teeth into Bruce’s arm. 

Little Jason would very politely come over and tug on his hand and Bruce would pick him up and let him bite his hand and drink, but Big Jason just pounces on Bruce from behind and sinks his teeth into Bruces shoulder/neck for blood. 

Little Tim slipping five dollar bills into Bruce’s hand just before chomping his thigh and Big Tim very casually stabbing a needle into Bruce’s leg, extracting blood and then putting it into his coffee and walking away. Sometimes, if he’s feeling nostalgic, he will curl up with his head on bruce’s lap and actually bite him for blood, for pure blood, but he likes his coffee bruce blood blend better

Little Cass never once asked bruce for blood because she was scared, but Bruce would just scoop her into his arms and offer her his already cut open shoulder until she was comfortable enough scaling him like a tree and drinking from his shoulder. Big Cass still doesn't ask for blood, she just lands on his shoulders and bites his bicep. 

Little Steph was a little vampire gremlin and any time she saw Bruce without clothes (since his children feed off of him Bruce wears very little, just a tank top and shorts and makes sure to shave as much as possible to provide ample biting space, but as Batman he still wears his full suit just easy to slip off certain parts so his kids can feed easily) she would suction onto him like a little affectionate leech and dig her little teeth into his back. Big Steph also likes his back and has much the same habits as little steph did. 

Little Babs wasn't too keen on blood, but sometimes Bruce would offer her his forearm while she was working and she would work and eat. Big Babs has no qualms about taking his blood, but has few chances, so he stops by her Oracle hideout sometimes and just holds out his arm for her to drink

Little Damian thought drinking blood from a human was beneath him. Until he saw Cass doing it and wanted to follow her footsteps, but he cant climb bruce as well as her, so he just sank his teeth into Bruce’s calf. Big Damian will wait until Bruce sits or lays down and props his feet up and will then enjoy his calf blood. 

Bruce Wayne who is covered, littered in bite scars of varying sizes, who was once knocked over by his three eldest sons because they had been on a mission away from him for a week and were hungry and before they even said hello just sank their teeth into his neck, hand and thigh. Bruce Wayne who’s majority of scars come from his children, not villains and who willingly offers up his neck to any one of his children if they seem hungry. 

Bruce Wayne who, as Batman, will peel his protective bat suit arm off because Dick was hungry on a stake out. 

Bruce Wayne who is not a vampire but his children all are and he’ll be damned if he deprives them their nutrients. 

(selina kyle who is also a vampire and also gets her blood from bruce but from his-)

[emotional-piece-of-meat]

Batkids + “I need my dad” moment 

When Dick has “I need my dad” moment, he goes straight to Bruce. No matter where he was, he'll find Bruce to hug him or to rest his head on his shoulder. He becomes uncharacteristically quiet, and Bruce holds back as tightly as Dick holds him.

Jason hates with burning passion having ��I need my dad” moments because it makes him feel small. It reminds him of a little boy who wanted nothing more than protection and comfort from his dad. And Jason hates to remember that this boy is still here.

Cass, on the other hand, cherish her “I need my dad” moments. It overwhelms her with love and joy, because she finally has a parental figure she can trust. Cass bonks her head into him to show her love, and you better believe that Bruce gives her tons of forehead kisses after.

Tim was weird out by “I need my dad” moment when it happened for the first time. He never had a dad he could rely on, so he didn't know how to process this craving. He still doesn't, and to these days he feels that these moments do not belong to him.

Damian doesn't understand this whole "I need my dad" kind of thing. He feels it, sure, but he doesn't understand what it is. He's already out of touch with his emotions, this one is too complicated to analyze and as useless as other feelings in his opinion, so he ignores it as he usually does with the rest of them.

When Duke has "I need my dad" moment, he asks Bruce to visit the local psychiatric hospital with him, because he doesn't have the moral strength to do it alone. Although Duke loves his surrogate father, he truly does, sometimes he just needs his dad. 

Bonus:

When Bruce has "I need my dad" moment, he brings Alfred food and asks him to cook something. Because, growing up, Bruce often watched Alfred cooking and such a routine gives him a certain sense of comfort. 

[gothamite-rambler]

Diana Prince (Wonder Woman) with all the batkids when they were kids

Dick Grayson:

Diana (rubbing young Dick Grayson's cheek with her hand): Baby, tiny, precious! You so cute!

Dick giggled with a smile.

Diana: You want a candy?

Dick: Hm, yes! Yes! Please!

Diana: Aww, so precious.

Bruce: He's not supposed to eat a lot of-

Diana (a sweet smile on her face): Bruce, you and I both know I can break every bone in your body at once.

Bruce (hiding his fear): I do remember that, I'll be talking to Superman.

---------------------------------------

Jason Todd:

Diana: Oh, you're so cute and precious! I just want to hug you for hours and hours. I love how tiny you are!

Young Jason feet dangled as Diana scooped him up and hugged him. He couldn't breathe well, but he wasn't not trying to break free.

Bruce: Okay... you're smothering him. Let him go.

Jason (struggling to breathe): Hold up Batman! I'm not complaining.

Diana: And remember I know how to break your bones.

Batman: All right I'll just go.

Batman walks away.

Young Jason: This is the greatest day ever. I... I'm trying not to cry.

Diana: You're so sweet.

---------------------------------------

Tim Drake:

Tim Drake clutched to the woman's hip, crying happily. Batman tried to pull him off, but Tim wouldn't let go.

Tim: This is the greatest day of my hero life! I am so happy to meet you!

Diana (simpering): I can't hold myself longer, I am happy to meet you too young warrior! You are just as precious as the rest!

Bruce: I have to stop bringing them around her- Dick, why are you crying?

Dick: That used to be me!

Dick cried, resting his head on Bruce's shoulder. Bruce sighed pinching the bridge of his nose.

---------------------------------------

Stephanie Brown (for the short time she was Robin)

Stephanie: Oh my goddess, you're Wonder Woman! Bomb girl boss! I've been wanting to meet you forever! I- Oh my goodness I'm embarrassing myself aren't I? You want me to leave, right?

Diana (elated): If I could I'd adopt you, but for now you're an honorary Amazon warrior! Want a hug?

Stephanie: YES!

Diana and Stephanie hugged, any attempt Bruce tried to take to break the two apart was met with Diana shoving him away.

Stephanie (dramatic fake sobs): I needed this, Batman is like so mean to me. Doesn't braid my hair even though I showed him the best tutorials and he doesn't appreciate me! I swear he's like my dad.

Diana glared at Bruce who's face turned red with anger.

Bruce: Okay, that was mean. I'm leaving!

Bruce stormed off while Diana took Stephanie's hand and led her way to chat and braid her hair.

---------------------------------------

Damian Wayne:

Bruce: Okay so Wonder Woman is bit... Obsessed with cute kids. Just be ready.

Damian: Oh father please, I've dealt with way worse.

The doors to the meeting slid open where Diana was already in the room. She sat at the Justice League meeting table. Once she spotted Damian, she gasped.

Damian tensed surprised, he backed away slowly as he began to get flashbacks to Talia.

Diana (eager): You got the itty bitty ones again?! Come here young warrior!

Damian: Noooo!

Damian ran away as Diana chased him with her arms open wide.

Diana: Let me give you cheek rubs!

Damian (screaming): Get away from me!

Clark Kent walked over to Bruce while snacking on a granola bar.

Clark: You ever think about not having a kid sidekick?

Bruce: You've got one more time to tell me that and I'm sending kryptonite to your house.

Clark (sarcastic): Glad your practicing being kinder to us like I told you too.

[wondersinwaynemanor]

hc that the batkids' partners go to Steph for anything as she's a batfam member already so she has ideas on what the others like or dislike.

1.

Wally, hands Steph a Batburger: Here ya go.

Steph, narrows her eyes on the food: Extra cheese?

Wally nods.

Steph: Did you ask for extra ketchup?

Wally, shrieks: You don't have ketchup in your apartment???

Steph: Do you want to know whether Dick liked the flowers you gave him last week or not?

Wally, already zooming away: Give me a sec, Stephanie!

2.

Roy, hands her the coffee machine that he fixed: Just loose wiring.

Steph, nods at it: Great job, Harper. Thanks.

Steph, hands Roy the tools she borrowed from the cave for his next project: If these even get a little scratch, B will not be pleased.

Roy, rolls his eyes: Delicate fingers, Brown.

Roy, hands some flowers he got from Dinah's shop: I believe these are fresh, Cass will love these.

Steph, smells them: Beautiful.

Steph, hands the special recipe of Butternut Squash soup that Jason loves: And if you lose this.... Then Alfie will take both of us down in a heartbeat.

Roy: I would never want to be against Alfred.

3.

Steph, groans: What is it this time, Clone?

Kon, floats by Steph on the rooftop: How did you handle it when Rob was having nightmares?

Steph: Does he still sleepwalk?

Kon, shrieks: He sleepwalks???

Steph, shrugs: Maybe.

Kon: What am I supposed to do??

Steph, shrugs casually: Slap him awake and kiss him, I supposed.

4.

Izzy, calls Steph: So...

Steph: I figure you need some advise on something related to Duke?

Izzy: Hey, I was just going to ask if you want to go get your nails done.

Steph: You paying?

Izzy: You are the one living under that mansion, Steph.

Steph: Not exactly.

Izzy: Ohh.

the conversation dies down for a couple of seconds, before Steph speaks again.

Steph, sighs: Take him to the new movie that's out. He likes Sci-fi movies.

Izzy, squeals: You're the best, Steph!

5.

Steph: It's about time the little Kent showed up.

Jon, floats by Steph on the rooftop: So Kon has done this too?

Steph: All of them thinks I know everything.

Jon: Well, you have the advantage.

Steph just shrugs and then shows Jon the kitten she picked on the street yesterday.

Steph: Here. She's cleaned and I also fed her some of my food at home, but Dami has everything she needs so make sure you handle her with care, okay? Not the Kryptonian strength of yours.

Jon, nods eagerly and takes the kitten from her hands: Got it. Thank you, Stephanie.

Steph, ruffles his hair: Steph is alright, little dude.

[littlefankingdom]

I saw another post criticizing Bruce for having children fighting at his side, and I must say: tell me you don't know shit about the batkids' stories without telling me. Bruce fucking tried to stop those kids from being vigilantes, but they keep doing it behind his back, so he decided the best thing to do was to give them the proper training, an armor and to have them stick at his side so he can watch over them. You know, like a parent telling their underage children that they can drink alcohol but only at home where they can watch over them.

Dick became Robin because he wanted revenge over his parents' murder. He would run out in the street of Gotham as a 8 years old, all alone, to go fight Zucco. Bruce helping him make Robin was the compromise to keep Dick safe, because the child would not listen. (And yes, it wasn't the case in the very first canon, but it was like the 40s. Do you know how many kids fought against the Nazis in Europe at that time???)

Barbara Gordon is not his daughter and he has no authority on her being a vigilante. He cannot even ground her.

Jason became Robin after helping Bruce take down Ma Gunn's school. It is implied by Bruce, while talking to Dick, that he offered Robin to Jason as a way to gain a child because he missed having Dick around. He didn't need a Robin, he just missed having a kid. Bruce used the Robin mantle with Jason like people use churu to appease stray kitten. AND JASON'S DEATH, let's talk about it. Jason ran away, which leads to him being killed, after eavesdropping on Bruce and Alfred talking about Jason's mental health. Jason is benched as Robin, but not because Bruce thinks he killed someone like fandom says, but because Bruce knows it is not helping or healthy for Jason. They are talking about getting him help for his traumas and how violence is not helping Jason. And, when he is older and has healed, they can try again if he wants to. That's why Jason or people saying that Jason died because he was a soldier, or blaming Bruce for Robin's existence is false. When Jason died, Bruce was against Jason being Robin for his own health! And Jason knows that, he heard the discussion, he wasn't bench like how so many of his siblings are, with little to no honest explanation. Jason died in the Robin's costume because of his own stubbornness, not because of Bruce. (And that's not blaming Jason for his death. He is not to blame, but neither is Bruce. It's just about the Robin's colors. Jason would not have been wearing them at the time if he listened to Bruce.)

Tim Drake imposed himself as Robin. Bruce was against it, Tim literally went "Don't care, didn't ask". And Tim was already following them around before. Bruce already have Jason blaming him for making Tim Robin when he had no control over that.

Stephanie Brown became a vigilante before Batman knew her. He has tried SO MANY TIMES to make her stop, and so many fans hate that he did it. Make a choice, is it bad that he didn’t stop her more or that he didn’t let her more be a vigilante? He even got his kids to try to make her stop. AND SHE IS "KILLED" TO TEACH HIM THAT MAKING KIDS VIGILANTES IS BAD WHEN HE IS NOT RESPONSIBLE OF HER BECOMING ONE AND TRIED TO STOP HER! No shit the man blames himself for things that are not his fault, everyone does it.

Cassandra Cain was 17 when she becomes Batgirl, so I don't know if she counts. But when Bruce tries to make her stop for her own health, with the support of Barbara and Alfred, Cass is devastated and doesn't obey him. She puts on her costume and fights him physically.

Damian Wayne was trained as an assassin. In every version of him being introduced to Bruce, Bruce is against making him Robin and Damian keeps sneaking out. Damian wants to prove himself to his father so bad and refused to be kept away from the fight. In the comics, it's Dick, DICK, that makes him Robin when Bruce is gone, because Bruce was against letting Damian out at night.

Conclusion: Bruce is a tired father of a bunch of kids that cannot understand they should stay home at night and not be vigilantes.

[corkinavoid]

DPxDC Demon Children Are Multiplying

This idea is still stuck in my head, and I might even end up writing something out of it, but for now, I just thought of something equally really, really stupid and really, really funny.

What if I combine that idea with Al Ghul Twins. I don't know how. Maybe Talia was cautious about Ra's not wanting to keep two kids for a position of Heir, or maybe she staged Danny's death, or maybe something else entirely happened. But anyway, Danny is Damian's twin.

Then, Dani is the same age as Danny in this AU. And Dan is de-aged to be the same age as both of them.

Now behold an absolute train wreck of a situation where Bruce attends a Gala hosted by Vladimir Masters. Together with Damian, of course, and maybe other batkids are there too. They all part their ways to make their rounds or whatnot. And they all keep seeing Damian wherever they go. Just everywhere.

Dick is talking to someone, and Damian walks past him, not paying him any attention. Which is not surprising, but a little rude, and, wait, wasn't he wearing a red tie? When did he change it to green one?

Tim is just going on the top floor to greet a lady he recognizes from some other event, and Damian all but storms in the opposite direction, only letting Tim catch a glimpse of his face. But when Tim turns around, he is really confused: the person running down the stairs is clearly a girl, albeit she is wearing a suit. Her long hair is up in a complicated braid. Why did he even mistake her for Damian?

But the ultimate confusion happens when Bruce is talking to Vladimir Masters, and a very familiar voice calls, "Father". Because both he and Vladimir turn to face the boy and ask, "Yes?" at the same time.

Damian is standing there, looking between Bruce and Vlad. He looks a little off somehow, but before Bruce can figure out why, the boy blinks and focuses on Vlad.

"We've been looking for you," he tells the man, and, wait, when was Damian looking for Masters? Furthermore, who is we?

But then another child comes closer. And-

That's Damian.

That's two Damians.

Wait, no, none of them are Damians.

"What is it?" Vladimir raises an eyebrow, not paying too much attention to Bruce's blanched expression.

A third child comes towards them, and this one also looks like Damian, only this one is a girl.

"Template's duplicate is here," she says, and Vlad frowns, turning to the Damian lookalike in the middle.

"Have you had another incident that I don't know of?"

Whatever answer the boy wanted to give is cut off by a n o t h e r child who looks like- no, this is real Damian, thank God, Bruce had started to wonder if the champagne was spiked with hallucinogens.

"Father-" he stops in his tracks as the three other children turn to him, and the four of them just stare at each other for a long moment. Then the one in the middle takes a sharp breath in and stage-whispers:

"Quick, do the meme!"

And all three not-Damians start pointing at each other.

Bruce is going to have an aneurysm. Judging by Vladimir's face, he is also not far from one.

Just my ramblings under the cut

I think you all know what meme I'm talking about, but I'm still gonna add it

This is so fucking hilarious to me, I'm sorry, I just can't

Danny is not missing this opportunity of a lifetime, even though Vlad specifically asked all three of them not to cause a scene. And yes, they all call Vlad "father" just for the spite of it or for shits and giggles. I'm going with Bad Fentons idea here, although I'm not sure to which degree they are bad, but anyway, Vlad is their legal guardian, and he is redeemed.

Yes, Dick took a picture. Yes, it's already in the group chat. Yes, other batkids are going wild.

Damian is greatly confused because, first, he thought there was a clone of him at the gala, but apparently, there were three of them, and second, why are they pointing at each other? Should he join them? He is under the assumption his brother is dead (he's not exactly wrong on that account), or he doesn't even know he existed.

This is as far as I got now, feel free to add anything!

[radiance1]

Pariah Dark is summoned to the DC universe by cultists who want to give the world over to him, he obliges in their request since he'll get something out of it, and he hasn't been out in ages as well.

So Pariah Dark raises his army of the dead and gets to work, his general isn't here with him but he would do fine without him, couldn't be that hard.

Besides, said general is occupied with a task of the utmost importance.

A few days into this siege Pariah is surprised at how much of a fight this world is putting up, that 'Justice League' of theirs is proving a fair more challenge than he would have though and since when did humans know the arcane secrets of magic?

It was a few more days later that Pariah Dark is about to face off against the league and their magic users that something unexpected happened. A teenage boy appeared on the battlefield, glowing white hair and starry cloak billowing in the wind as he stood before the Ghost King in all his glory.

Only to groan and tell him to come home already and that he promised not to do his whole 'enslaving worlds' thing. Pariah Dark, the Ghost King known as a tyrant and cruel, wilting under the boy's stare and actively seemed to be considering it, before confusion appeared on his face and he asked where his general was.

Kid just held up one side of his cloak and Fright Knight popped right out as if summoned, which, technically he was.

So then the kid forced the notorious Ghost King back to the Infinite Realms with a stare and words dripping in disappointment before turning back to the heroes gathered there with a sigh.

"I know father can be a bit... rough, so please accept my apologies for this." He bowed, all the regal air and dignity of a prince before leaving through the same portal as his dad.

The magic users of the League are both not and are taking it well. One on hand, the goddamn Ghost king apparently has a son, on the other he's not as bloodthirsty as his father.

(After thought. But bonus points if Fright Knight appears too one of the batkids after Danny left and telling them that the prince thought they were cute or something idk mane just an after thought)

[wonderjanga]

Marvel Being a Bad Dad (Pedro, Eugene, and Darla Edition)

By the way in this AU Mary is still his twin, but let’s say he knows the Vázquez for whatever reason. Also, in case it wasn’t obvious all of the Marvels besides Billy look like kids. Like actual kids. 10 to 14 depending on how old they are actually. Anyways, this is just a little short add-on to the original post. Nothing more. Also this has a little bit of Mexican Billy, courtesy of someone’s headcanon I saw and a post of Jason Todd babysitting the other Batkids.

*The League is throwing a party and Billy brings Darla and Eugene along. Marvel is talking to Batman while Darla is running around with Impulse. Also Eugene is talking tech with Tim!Robin*

Marvel: “And so yeah—” *looks to a table before doing a double take* “One sec.” *Looks around for Darla*

Darla: *stopped at the snack table for some juice*

Marvel: *Does that thing my mom does to get my attention: snaps fingers and beckons with her pointer with an expression that leaves me wondering if I’m going to get my ass beat*

Darla: *pauses mid juice sip and zips over*

Marvel: *leans down to whisper in her ear* “Toma esa cosa de la mesa.” *points el adorno on the snack table*

Darla: “Wha?” *looks over to the table* “The centerpiece? You can’t take that—”

Marvel: “Cállate!” *takes two fingers and pinches her mouth close* “No me importa. Tú lo vas a tomar. Vete.” *tries to shoo her away and takes his fingers off her mouth.*

Darla: “But that’s wrong!”

Marvel: “Vete.” *says while gritting teeth* “O corto el pelo de todas tus Barbies.”

Darla: *scandalized gasp*

Marvel: “Ah, y dáselo a tu hermano cuando termines. Gracias.” *shooes her off again*

Darla: *has distraught expression as she zips over and grabs it and runs off to Eugene to hand it to him with a guilty look before running back over to run around with Impulse again*

Eugene: *promptly throws it over his shoulder into his pocket dimension*

Robin!Tim: “Was that one of the centerpieces?”

Eugene: “Yeah?”

Robin!Tim: “Did you guys just steal it?”

Eugene: ���Also yes.” *nods head*

Robin!Tim: “Why…? Also where did it go?” *rounds Eugene to look for it*

Eugene: “I threw it in my pocket dimension.”

Robin!Tim: “How does that work?”

*The two then forget about that whole thing and then start talking about magic, then go back to tech, then start talking about combining magic and tech*

*Back with Bruce and Billy…*

Batman: “Why did you just go send that child to go steal one of my centerpieces that I paid for with my money in my own Watchtower?”

Marvel: “You understood that- actually wait. You’re Batman. Of course you understood that.”

Batman: “Hn.” (Batman language for: Just tell me already)

Marvel: “Alright, alright.” *claps hand on Bruce’s shoulder* “Look, we needed it more than you ever will, okay?” (They really don’t)

Batman: “Elaborate on that.”

Marvel: “See, I can’t. So instead I’m just gonna go raid the snack table.” *juts a thumb towards the snack table* “See ya, Bats!” *waves and walks off to the snack table*

Batman: *Bat-glares at him as he leaves*

or

*The Justice League are fighting a super strong villain. Currently, Flash and Billy are hiding behind a rock while the villain’s goons are shooting at them. Billy also forgot to mention to Flash that he brought along Pedro*

Flash: “Okay, so here’s the plan- Dude, why is that little kid here?” *points to Pedro*

Marvel: “Huh, you mean him?” *also points to Pedro*

Flash: “Who else, man?” *gives Billy a look* “Bud, in case you can’t tell, this place is super dangerous. Like, Supes got knocked out for a moment type of dangerous! So why’s he still here? You should’ve sent him away!”

Marvel: “What? Pshhhh… He’ll be fine, Flash. Trust me.” *pats Pedro’s head* “Anyways, buddy, say hi to Flash.”

Pedro: *gives a little wave*

Marvel: *stage whispers this to Flash* “He’s a little shy. Me and the others are trying to get him to interact with people more.”

Flash: *notes how Marvel is a little too carefree about this. He later forgets about that when Pedro actually helps quite a bit in the fight. He also notes how this is one of the only instances he’s seen of Marvel acting positively towards his “kids”*

Translations:

Toma esa cosa de la mesa = Take that thing from the table

el adorno = The ornament/the decoration/in this case the centerpiece

Cállate = Be quiet

Vete = Go away/Go

O corto el pelo de todas tus Barbies = Or I cut the hair of all your Barbies

Ah, y dáselo a tu hermano cuando termines. Gracias = Oh, and give it to your brother when you’re done. Thanks.

[swe3tte4rs]

Batifamily headcanons feeling jealous about their siblings spending more time with Batmom? Or something like that, however you like to write it 🙊

" Jealousy jealousy " - Batmom!Reader x Batkids

Author's note: MERRY CHRISTMAS AND HAPPY NEW YEAR (late)!!! Love this 🫶. And I feel like this request is VERY my AU!!! Dah, who wouldn't compete for the love of their sweet and loving mother!? (The hatred between them began when Bruce had to set schedules for each one so they wouldn't fight for Batmom's attention... joke)

Also I am very sad, because when I was responding to this kind of request and I saved it as a draft, it was deleted 😭!!! CRYING 💔💔!!! On top of that, I loved the request, it was beautiful 😭! It was about Batmom as Bruce's couple and Bruce introduces Batmom to the batkids... And if it was you who sent it 🫵, let me tell you that I loved it and it will take me a while to upload it 💓!! Lov you all

And (I almost forgot to mention this), This AU of the batfamily is a mix of comics, series, headcanons (I LOVE headcanons of batfamily 💗), video games, movies and webtoon! + My main language is not English, so if you find any spelling mistakes, tell me in a comment!

Request opens 💗💗!!! BUT, before you request anything check my rules.

Dick Grayson / Nightwing

Honestly, I don't see him being jealous of his brothers at all! But since I haven't read all of his comics and in this AU he is a mix, I don't have an opinion. 👀

Let us begin.

I feel like Dick is a real mama's boy, he love his mom and he will prove it.

Dick is very used to having all of Batmom's attention to himself.

But he hides his jealousy very well, or so he thinks…

Jealousy began when Dick started having siblings. DON'T DENY ME GIRL 🤝🤝!!!

When he gets jealous that you spend more time with, I don't know, he'll go to sleep with you and Bruce, but leaving Bruce aside and enjoying your caresses in his hair while he listens to his siblings complain from outside the bedroom. (Bruce hate this, but I feel that at the same time he love it just a little bit. Very little.)

Possibly he will also rub things you did with him that you didn't do with your other children in his siblings' faces.

I think he is the only one (along with Jason) who has a complete album with photos of him as a child. So he'll show it off to others by saying that you loved him so much that you made an entire photo album of him.

He would do the same with Jason, telling him that his album has more photos and with more photos of you and Dick.

I feel like he would start a whole fight against one of his brothers just to carry all the shopping bags by himself so you don't do it. (This idea is similar to "Jason Todd is a total mama's boy" because I was inspired by it, so credit to its respective author 💓)

"Mommy, did you just call me Damian? Oh my god... my heart..." #atotaldramaqueenbaby💋💋👊👊

Jason Todd / Red Hood

Another drama queen...

A mama's boy from head to toe. (My poor baby just needed a fucking mother figure 😭💔)

He is first in everything. Do you need help opening a jar? He already opened it for you and said I love you and then left and returned to a mission.

But that's not what we're talking about right now... Nonono, we're talking about jealousy, guys...

I bet he's the most sensitive of all.

He makes sure you don't show favoritism to anyone, unless it's him, if so he lets it go.

Did you spend an extra minute with one of your other children because you didn't see the time? He is already burning in a pit of jealousy.

I feel like he would start fighting with his sibling and then he would apply the law of silence to you. But it doesn't last long because he can't resist your cute nicknames and your "you're my favorite" (you say that to each of your babies)

"Why do you call him "son"? He isn't even your son!" And he gives you a whole long speech when you were just trying to be nice to Roy.

He even gets jealous of Bruce.

He doesn't care if it's one of his sisters or a good friend of his, you can't call them cute nicknames! And even less if they are the ones you use with him!

He has good hearing, he makes sure that you call him by his nicknames and not by one of his siblings' nicknames.

"WHAT THE FUCK, MA?! Why are you washing Tim's hair with the shampoo you use with me!?!?" You broke him...

Tim Drake / Red Robin

( I haven't read almost anything by Tim, so forgive me if something doesn't add up, but I promise you that I already have more or less what his personality is like.)

Tim does not admit his jealousy, he is calmer compared to his brothers.

He might start scheduling his patrols to coincide with Batmom’s free time, ensuring that he gets to spend some time with her.

I feel like he would feel more insecurity than jealousy

But I also think he would try to take Batmom's attention away from his sibling by calling Batmom to help him do something he can easily do alone.

He wouldn't care if you treated his friends like your children. I think he would be happy.

Umh Well… I think there's not much to jealousy about this one...

Damian Wayne / Robin

Yes, I headcanon that Damian is one of the most jealous once he realizes that Batmom can give him the love that Talia didn't give him.

He is the same as Jason, he has the same percentage of jealousy.

The only thing is that he would start making arguments about why Batmom would have to spend the whole week with him and not with her brothers.

Oh, and he doesn't care what Bruce does with Batmom. Although he is disgusted by the slightest affection they have.

At galas, I feel like he would be glued to you, hugging your waist and making sure there is no threat.

If you're not patrolling, he'd be with you watching some movie. (I DON'T KNOW WHY I IMAGINED HIM WATCHING MEAN GIRLS)

"I say mom Is going to go with me first because I'm the best-" And then he was interrupted by his siblings.

There is a relationship of hate and equality between him and Jason…

"Don't you see that my mother has an engagement ring and I'm next to her, son of a- *you interrupt him*" I feel like he would say this to anyone who flirts with you.

He is not understanding why his siblings get to spend more time with her.

Mama's boy

I would continue writing, but I have no more inspiration and ideas, sorry...

Cassandra Cain / Orphan

WHY DID SHE PUT THAT NAME BRO???

Cassandra, being the quiet and observant one, might internalize her feelings of jealousy.

Cass is the last one to get jealous, honestly.

She understands that Batmom loves them all equally and there is no favoritism.

Although sometimes she doubts…

She would feel excluded every time she sees you spend more time with one of her siblings.

But putting that behind, she would know that you love them all equally and would let it go by speaking with you how she feels.

0,1% jealous.

Stephanie Brown / Spoiler

Depends…

I think she would feel jealous if Batmom shows favoritism towards others.

In itself, I don't think Steph is VERY jealous. Just... a little bit.

Duke Thomas / The Signal

I need to read more about this man 😭

He's the newest one in the batfam, but he was still able to connect with Batmom very well.

Duke is not one to be jealous, he just doesn't care what batmom does.

Although he is a similar case to Cass.

He would feel a little "insecure" seeing the ties Batmom has with his siblings.

But it always ends well with Batmom watching a movie with him.

[You can put more headcanons in a comment if you like!! And suggestions are always welcome <3]

[flamingpudding]

Danny gets summoned out of his final exams to help the Justice League with a Multivers-level of tread. Grumbling the entire time, he transforms, helps, and just wants to return home cause, hello he was summoned in the middle of his exams but can't return because of the aftermath. Danny is angry and pissy with them the entire time, with a couple exception in the younger generations like Kon when he learned the guy was a clone.

Meanwhile the batkids started to bet on who of the Justice league will attempt to keep Danny:

Red Hood: I like the kid. I give it three weeks, money is on Wonder Woman.

Red Robin: with how B is. Two on him.

Nightwing: One, Green Lantern has been complaining that he wants a kid.

Spoiler: oh are we betting on mentoring or adoption? I put my money on Constantine for the chaos.

Robin: This is ridicules.... I place it on Jon pestering his father.

Red Robin: wait we are throwing in the Sups now? Change it to one week, Kon likes him ever since he mentioned having a clone sister.

Orphan holding up two fingers.

Signal: Mentor wise, two days, adoption? I give him a week. Doesn't matter who though.

Oracle: oh aren't you all forgetting something? The Justice League Dark was the one doing the summoning, they already stated claim on him.

Danny could only stare flabbergasted at them. Didn't they hear what he said? He needs to find a way back home, his final exams were at stake, his sister, the older one, would kill him if he bombed them.

[incorrectbatfam]

How would the batfam react to someone robbing the Manor?

Robber: *enters*

Dick: Oh good, you're here! Do these shorts make my butt look big?

———————

Robber: *taking things*

Jason: What are you doing?

Robber: Robbing you.

Jason: There's a safe in Bruce's office. Passcode is 0816. Feel free to take a crack at it. I'll be in the library if you need me.

———————

Robber: *picking the lock*

*door flies open and hits them*

Tim, on the phone: I'll be there in ten. In the meantime, tell Kon and Bart not to touch anything.

*door slowly swings shut*

Robber, stuck to the door: *slowly peels off*

———————

Robber: *pocketing antiques*

Damian: You must be Alfred's new assistant. I see you're already taking the initiative to get our family heirlooms restored. After that, I need you to do the laundry as I have run out of clean school uniforms.

Robber: Uh, no, kid. I'm robbing you.

Damian: Oh. In that case...

Damian: *stabs them*

———————

Robber: *walks in*

Duke, being kidnapped: Do you mind? We're kind of in the middle of something.

Robber: Sorry, I'll come back later.

———————

Robber: *enters*

Cullen: Hey, I know you're here to rob us, but I've been practicing some magic tricks to impress my boyfriend's family. Can you do me a favor and pick a card?

Robber:

Robber: *picks a card*

———————

Steph: *making a snack while wearing headphones*

Robber: *sneaks up behind her*

Steph: *throws a banana peel over her shoulder*

Robber: *slips on the banana peel*

Robber: *slides across the kitchen*

Robber: *gets tangled in the curtains*

Robber: *falls into a suitcase*

*suitcase shuts*

*suitcase rolls outside into the pool*

Steph: *takes off her headphones and turns around*

Steph: Did someone say something?

———————

Robber: *climbs in through the window*

Cass: Hi.

Robber: Hi.

Cass: You're a robber.

Robber: Yes.

Cass:

Cass: *pushes them out the window*

———————

Robber: *comes in*

Barbara: *looks up from her computer*

Robber: *slowly backs out*

Barbara: That's what I thought.

———————

Robber: Give me the TV!

Harper: Sure, just hold this for me please.

Harper: *hands him a grenade*

Harper: *pulls the pin*

Harper: *walks away*

———————

Robber: *unlocks the door*

Carrie: You must be our new bouncy house guy.

Robber: No, I'm robbing you.

Robber: Wait, you have a bouncy house guy?

———————

Robber: *enters*

Kate, with a clipboard: Name?

Robber: My name's Rob, I'm here to rob you.

Kate: Sorry, I don't have you on our list.

———————

Robber: *saws a hole in the wall*

Helena: What are you doing?

Robber: Robbing you.

Helena: You know the door's unlocked, right? I swear, it's like people don't even try nowadays.

———————

Robber: *unplugging the XBox*

Luke: Best Buy is just down the road.

Robber: ...You're Luke Fox.

Luke: Yes I am.

Robber: Champion MMA fighter Luke Fox.

Luke, rolling up his sleeves: Always nice to meet a fan.

———————

Robber: *ransacking the place*

Bette: Who hurt you?

Robber: What?

Bette: This isn't a healthy coping mechanism. Talk to me. I'm here for you.

Robber, breaking down: It all started when I was little...

———————

Robber: *sneaks in*

Alfred: Not on my watch.

Alfred: *drags them out by the ear*

Robber: Ow, ow, ow.

———————

Robber: *smashes the window*

Selina: Pfft, amateur. Let me show you how it's done.

———————

Robber: *steals the computer*

Bruce: *reading the newspaper*

Robber: *takes valuable jewelry*

Bruce: *still reading*

Robber: *lightly bumps into one of the batkids*

Robber: *turns around*

Bruce: *suddenly appears with the bat-glare*

Robber: I'm just gonna—

Robber: *gets instantly knocked out*

[warmilikeit]

CONTAINS SPOILERS, ONLY SLIGHT BUT STILL, also characters explainations

Yandere DC x Pjo

_____________________________

ne thing I don't agree with most of the "Neglected reader" series is that once they realize the reader is worthy of their love, they stop loving each other???

Like there are scenarios where they will fight each other for the reader, that doesn't sit right with me, they share secrets and trauma together and trust each other with their life, that's not going to disappear because of the reader

So in my story, Batfam still loves each other despite what happened to the reader, and this love for family is crucial to future chapters

So protective Jason, at chapter five, glaring at Jon and all

AND ALSO

Most of the time the only reason Batfam loves the reader is out of pure guilt, they don't actually love the reader

Another change in my story is that, the Batfam and reader have their moments, though it's rare, the reader still makes memories with Batfam, although their painful ones

The batkids has created an image in their head that the reader is this pathetic person who was lucky enough to be born rich, and that was the holding grudge to why Batfam treated the reader badly

Yes Damian was also born rich, but he was suffering, when Damian got accustomed to Bruce's affection he felt bitter that the reader had this affection and yk

Bruce on the other hand, is raw, He got the reader when he was still building his reputation as batman, he didn't think a fling child was important, until dick came, he became a sidekick and there he decided to make you one too

To Bruce you were a convenience, just another assistant to him, and he wasn't really a father, but rather an employer, he built his relationship with Dick through being a sidekick, while having no relationship with you turned you into one for more assistance

But it doesn't mean they don't love you, of course they do, that's the main reason Bruce made you stop being a Robin in the first place, because you were a target

It's just that in their heads, you were already this insignificant person, they didn't realize how much you meant to them until you died

Even if you didn't die, if you weren't taken to Camp half-blood, they would have realized their love for you on their own

Only problem is, at camp half-blood, you were able to heal

Inside the Manor, you weren't

So chances of you forgiving them are higher when you're at camp rather than staying in the manor

The difference is also the trauma, you grew up inside the Manor since birth, you were comfortable

That's why the family didn't think to give you that much attention in the first place

That trauma is also why you don't like how your mom said "I'm giving you attention cause you're pitiful"

[hypewinter]

Bruce carefully approached the child playing by himself in the park. The child giggled as they played with chalk, the sidewalk illuminated by a single street lamp.

"What are you drawing?" he said softly, not wanting to alarm them.

The child turned, revealing themself to be a little boy, no older than 5. He had raven black hair and icy blue eyes. Bruce could practically already hear Oracle snickering on the other end of the comms. She had probably already taken a snapshot of the boy through his visor and posted to the batkids group chat which contrary to popular belief, he did know about. Bruce sighed internally. He'd never hear the end of it when he got home. Especially if he had the kid in tow. Let's hope that didn't happen.

"Hello Batman!" a cheery voice broke him out of his thoughts. "I'm drawing a gargaggle!"

Bruce refocused on the boy who showed no signs of fear. He didn't even look surprised which was strange to say the least. "A gargaggle? Do you mean gargoyle?"

The boy furrowed his brows for a bit before piping up again. "I do! It's such a funny word. I can never get it right."

"I know the feeling," Bruce said, crouching down next to the boy. "Sometimes I struggle with words too."

The boy's eyes went wide as if he couldn't believe the Batman struggled with words. "Say-" Bruce started, "-it's pretty late out are your parents nearby?"

The boy shook his head. "No, I don't have parents," he said as he went back to doodling.

Ok Bruce don't freak out just yet. "Oh, then do you have a guardian of sorts? Like an older sibling, or another family member? Like an aunt or grandparent?"

The boy shook his head again. "Nope. Oh! But I do have a friend. She's very nice and gives me lots of gifts and special things."

Alright, he could work with that. Maybe this 'friend' was the kid's guardian and he just didn't realize it yet. That could happen if he was put in their care recently. Bruce cleared his throat to get the boy to look up at him again. "Do you know where your friend is right now?" he asked.

The boy smiled wide. " 'course I do! She's right over there!" As he spoke, he pointed to a clutter of trees, just to his left. "She really loves you and your family," he said. "She's shy though, so she hid when she saw you coming."

"I see," Bruce replied as he got up. "Well maybe I can convince her to come out." He walked over to where the boy had pointed and pulled apart the bushes, hoping to find a woman who he could talk to about the dangers of wandering around at night. Instead he found nothing.

Bruce heard a giggle from behind him. "That's not where she is silly," he said.

"But that's what you-"

"She's not in the bushes, she's in the shadows. She's really good at hide and seek you know. Once we were playing and she hid in the shadows. Then she snuck up behind me from another shadow. It was really unfair! I never win hide and seek or tag against her," the boy said, starting to pout.

She's in the shadows? A meta? And one with a similar power set to Signal no less. Hmmmm.

Bruce began making his way back to the boy. "Then where is she right now?" he asked.

The boy shrugged, as he returned to his drawing once again. "I don't know. Sometimes she leaves and doesn't return for days. Since you're around, I don't think she's coming back for a while."

Great, just great. He had managed to scare off a little boy's only guardian in the middle of the night. Good going Bruce. he chided himself. He crouched down next to the boy again. "Do you know how to get home? Maybe we can wait for your friend there."

The boy turned to Bruce again. "Sure do!" he said, puffing out his chest. " 'cause I'm a big boy and big boys know how to get home on their own." he recited.

That was another point for the growing concerning information checklist. "Okay let's go wait for her then."

The boy's face dropped as he looked longingly at his gargoyle drawing. For a moment, Bruce thought he would have to bribe the kid with a lollipop but instead he held up his arms to be carried. "Okay," he said solemnly.

Bruce exhaled in relief as he picked up the boy. After pulling out his grappling gun he turned to the boy. "Where to...." Shit. Had he really forgotten to ask for the kid's name?

The boy in question didn't seem all too bothered by that fact. "Danny," he answered seamlessly. "And it's that way." Bruce aimed his grappling gun and off they went.

----

It took Danny all of two directions before he was out like a light. Bruce sighed, switching directions. Yep, he would truly never hear the end of it.

Next

[librababe99]

When They're All Home

Tags: Fluff, Bruce Wayne x Wife Reader, Batkids, Batfamily goodness WC: 910 words Summary: Surrounded by laughter and love, you cherish this fleeting moment of peace, knowing your family is finally home—even if just for tonight.

A/N: Hello! It's been a few weeks since I've last posted. I was feeling very burnt out with writing and didn't feel like I was providing the quality you all deserve. School and life also really started to pick up for me.... Buttttt I hope that this little fluffy one shot makes up for my absence!

| Masterlist |

The halls of Wayne Manor were bustling in a way that hadn’t happened in ages. The grand old house seemed to come alive with the unmistakable hum of voices, footsteps, and laughter—yes, even laughter. The rare symphony of the entire Wayne family being home at once.

You paused at the top of the grand staircase, gazing down as everyone settled in, a soft smile gracing your lips. Bruce came up behind you, placing a warm hand on your back, and for a moment, the two of you watched in contented silence.

“They’re all here,” you murmured, a soft warmth filling your chest. It didn’t happen often, not with the unique and sometimes complicated lives they each led. But tonight? Tonight, they were all home.

“Feels like the old days, doesn’t it?” Bruce whispered back, his deep voice low and gentle in your ear.

“Better,” you replied, eyes still taking in the sight below. Dick was laughing, arm around Tim’s shoulder as he animatedly recounted a story. Jason was by the window, looking like he might want to bolt but staying all the same, an amused smirk as he watched his brothers. Damian, his usual stoic self, pretended not to care but stuck close to you, his hand brushing yours as he leaned on the banister. Even Alfred was here, his dignified smile softened by the rare moment of togetherness.

“I just can’t believe they’re all here. All of them under one roof again.” You leaned into Bruce, letting yourself feel the happiness that filled your heart as you saw each of your boys together.

Downstairs, Dick was the first to catch sight of you both, his grin brightening as he waved you over. “Hey! Are you guys just gonna stand there all night, or are you going to come down and join us?”

Bruce smirked, giving you a look. “Duty calls.”

Hand in hand, the two of you descended the stairs, and as soon as you hit the landing, Dick pulled you both into a bear hug, one arm slung over each of you. "Glad you two decided to grace us with your presence,” he teased.

“Oh, we wouldn't miss this for the world,” you replied, hugging him back tightly. "I’m so glad you’re all here. It feels like…home.”

Jason scoffed from his spot by the window. “Getting sentimental already, huh?” But the hint of a smile softened his usual bravado.

You walked over, gently taking his hand. “If I didn’t know better, Jason, I’d say you missed us.”

He rolled his eyes, but the way he squeezed your hand back let you know he felt it, too. “Don’t push your luck…Ma.”

Your heart skipped, warmth spreading as you smiled at him. “Noted, Jason.”

The evening passed in a blur of laughter, memories, and everyone catching up on life. Tim and Damian found themselves in a surprising truce as they argued over strategy in one of their favorite board games. Dick made a dramatic performance of acting out stories from his latest missions, keeping everyone in stitches. Even Jason relaxed, offering up a few quips that had everyone laughing.

After dinner, you found yourself in the kitchen, tidying up while everyone was in the living room. You paused, leaning against the counter, letting the warmth of the night settle over you. They weren’t all your biological kids, but they were yours all the same. Your family, each of them so different yet so loved.

Bruce walked in, placing a hand on your shoulder. “You okay?”

“I’m perfect,” you said, reaching up to lace your fingers through his. “I just… I love them so much, Bruce. Seeing them all together like this makes me feel…” You trailed off, unsure if there was even a word for how full your heart felt.

He gave you a rare, gentle smile. “They love you too. More than you know.” And then, after a pause, he added, “You’re the reason they’re all here. You’re what brought us all together.”

You shook your head with a soft laugh. “Well, I don’t know about that.”

“I do,” Bruce said, pulling you into his arms. “They��re home because of you.”

The two of you lingered in the kitchen, wrapped in each other’s warmth, until you heard Tim’s voice call from the living room. “Are you two planning on hiding in there all night, or are we actually going to watch this movie, Mom?”

With a laugh, you and Bruce rejoined the group, taking your place among them. As the evening wore on, the boys began to drift off one by one, settling into the manor’s rooms or simply crashing on the couches. Jason fell asleep in an armchair, Damian nestled himself into a corner of the sofa with a book, and Dick was sprawled on the floor next to Tim, both of them talking quietly until their voices faded into the night.

When you and Bruce finally retired to your room, you glanced out the door one last time, your heart so full it ached.

“They’ll be off saving the world again tomorrow,” you murmured as you slipped under the covers, feeling Bruce’s arm wrap around you.

“But tonight, they’re home,” he replied, pressing a soft kiss to your forehead. And with that, you drifted off to sleep, surrounded by the comfort of knowing that, for this one night, you had your whole family right where they belonged.

[kyxhiin]

Everybody's heard of uncle Clark therapy, but what about uncle cap' therapy? (Pre identity reveal.)

Whenever the batkids get tired of Bruce's 'BS' they either go to Smallville for a Relaxing time with the supes. If the kids are looking for something insane and energy making to do, they go to Fawcett for uncle Cap therapy.

They fight around goons that they will be restricted to not fight cause of Batman, Steal Donuts from the cops, fight some evil villain in the most cartoony ways possible, and just take break out of that gloomy city and go to a city where it's stuck in the 1950s, fairies and unicorns exist, and where they will be allowed and encouraged to fight slighty dirty (not slightly, they will be fighting DIRTY.)

Tiny Conv:

Damian: This is utterly ridiculous, father. He was getting away, I had to break his legs. It had to be done. This isn't fair.

Bruce: You disobeyd my orders, this is the 5th call. You'll be put on break from patrol for a while.

Damian: This is idiotic. I'm going to Fawcett.

Babian said holding an already packed bag, marching to the zeta-tube.

Bruce holding the bridge of his nose, why does he even bother punishing his kids if they were going to runaway some place else like that. (He tried to stop them so many times from going to someplace else, but they always escaped and ended up at that place so he doesn't even bother anymore.

Few days later Damian comes back, with a comically large lolipop, stolen Donuts, and a whole lotta injuries. (It's fine, it'll heal soon..)

JL meeting that night was TENSE, Broodman was staring a hole into Captain Marvel's head (injustice superman and billy ref).

But he just can't seem to punish him normally, why is he tempted to treat an irresponsible grown man like a little kid and give him a grounding or something?