#good dad bruce wayne

[spicy-apple-pie]

I like to think that Jason always has food on him, especially as a kid.

I imagine him walking around the manor with his pockets bulging.

“What do you got in your pockets, Jay?” Bruce asks the first time he sees this, out of pure curiosity.

“None of your business.” Jason snaps. “Why? Think I got jewelry or something?”

“No, not at all.” Bruce hurries to correct. If Jason were stealing from him, he’d be more worried about the implication that he was planning to run away. “Just curious.”

Jason huffs, and leaves.

It doesn’t take long for Bruce to realize that Jason is stuffing his pockets with food. And not stuff like candy or cookies like Dick used to do on patrols, but more hardy foods like granola bars.

So he starts telling Alfred to get more packaged non perishables. A variety of granola bars, cheese and crackers, even juice boxes. And he never tells Jason about this, but the food goes missing all the same.

Bruce even puts pockets in Robin’s costume, just to make sure he feels comfortable.

Jason really appreciates it, but they never talk about it.

[spencerwayne-todd]

Keeping up with the Waynes

(8:00 AM; the entire family is gathered in the sun room for breakfast.)

Bruce: Kids, due to the most recent demolition of the Watchtower and the Hall of Justice, the weekly Justice League meeting will be held here today.

Bernard Dowd (Tim's boyfriend): Cool.

Steph: Yeah, it is.

Bruce: *Tired Dad Sigh* Please, just behave. That's all. Please?

Dick: We'll behave.

Bruce: I need to hear that promise from someone I trust.

Everyone: *looks at Duke and Cass*

Duke and Cass: We promise.

Bruce: Thank you. Someone please put it in the group chat so Spencer and Jason see it.

August: I'll do it.

(1:00 PM; the entire Justice League is seated in one of the large sitting rooms, discussing plans for rebuilding and updating their destroyed faciities)

J'onn Jones (Martian Manhunter): It may also be wise to include an extra medical facility on the Watchtower-

Someone, somewhere in the house: RUN!!!

Another voice: I AM RUNNING!!!!

First voice: RUN FASTER!!!

Justice League: ?

Bruce: *Tired Dad Sigh* It's my children.

(Dick, Tim, Cass, and Steph come bursting through the doors)

Tim: DAD HELP!

Bruce (Who definitely hasn't already forgiven them for every wrong ever committed (HIS KID CALLED HIM DAD!!): What happened?

Dick: We were helping Spencer practice magic in the graveyard but when August flew back from getting her a leaf from a tall tree, the wind from his wings blew the spell into Damian and now the ghost of a Victorian child is in love with him!

Bruce: I-how-what?

Tim: The ghost is trying to kidnap him!

Damian, flying past window being pulled by ghost: FATHER HELP!!

Bruce: Oh, god DAMIAN!!

(After a daring rescue by the Justice League a sobbing Bruce held a slightly shaken Damian like a baby for four hours straight. Dick took SO MANY PICTURES of the two of them asleep on the couch)

(I forgot to tag @august0bone)

[everwalldigan]

To anyone who thinks Bruce has a clear and consistent favourite child I raise you this: it is infinitely funnier for Bruce to have a complicated and elaborate “ranking” system of his kids that only he’s privy to.

Picture this: Batman, dosed with truth serum, gets asked as a gag from one of the goons holding him captive who his favourite bat-vigilante is and instead of giving a straight answer, he launches into this whole explanation about the ranking system and who’s in the current lead, who’s hanging behind, etc. At some point (this is a mystery to everyone involved) a whiteboard appears and he starts explaining his system like he’s a football coach before an important match. Out of nowhere he starts pulling out little cardboard cutouts of his kids and pins them to the board. At some point the red string comes out.

Jason hasn’t killed someone in a week? Automatically promoted to favourite. Tim hasn’t caused an international incident in the past month? Puts him a few points ahead that keep decreasing the longer he refuses real sleep (20 minute power naps don’t count Tim! Says powernap inventor Bruce Wayne). Cass gave him a hug this morning and wished him a good day? Favourite until he gets a call from dick telling him (without shouting!!!!) that he’ll be there for this week’s Sunday dinner. Duke accidentally scratches the Batmobile? Demoted to the “in trouble” zone (which, honestly, that’s where his kids spend most of the time in😭). Damian did not attempt to free all the animals in the zoo they visited? Favourite. Until Bruce found out he was just trying to conceal the cat hidden in his room that Bruce explicitly forbade him from keeping.

Dick arrives at the family dinner with a busted shoulder and a bruise the size of Texas on his face? Gets demoted so far down that even azraeil scores higher than him. He’s in the “in trouble” zone for a constant month after that. Oh one of them survived an almost death? Favourite for at least the next week. At least. Multiple people survive an almost death? EVERYONES the favourite. The least favourite is the growing grey hairs on his head.

The end of day results are decided by who bothers to wish him goodnight and if all of them have fucked up in some way the past week then Jon (Kent) becomes the automatic favourite until someone cracks a joke that Bruce actually finds funny.

The favourite child changes daily, hourly even, and his kids are aware this system exists and keep trying to crack the code but he always Knows and just smirks smugly.

[versasfanficwastedump]

and while i’m on a self indulgent thing? i think that any of the kids calling Bruce “dad” changes his whole demeanor. it helps him know that whatever they’re talking about is serious.

hearing his name shouted across the house does nothing for him. a hundred people say his name all day, including his kids. whatever the situation is can be fixed.

but hearing “Dad!”, cried out in battle or screamed from the other room, has him rushing to their side. what is it love and i’m here you’re alright and shh i’ve got you

“Bruce, I need help” = can’t open this large jar, have a question about math homework, need someone to look at this case file for me

“Dad, I need help” = I am hurt. I am scared. I am in danger. I need you to make things better. I need you to protect me.

[haveihitanerve]

Headcanon that Bruce’s kids have all pulled the ‘you're not my father card’ at some point or the other and by the time steph rolled around he didn't even take it seriously

Of course, the first time dick said it, bruce cried himself to sleep. But by the eighteenth time, he was numb to it. “Dickie just eat your peas.” 

The first time jason did it Bruce pulled him aside and said “i know Im not, but that doesn't mean i don't care for you jason.” by the twenty fifth time he just held up the adoption papers

The first time Tim said it Bruce laughed. “Tim, you literally forced me to adopt you. Yes I am your father.” Tim didn't bother to say it from then on, maybe muttering ‘you're not my dad!’ under his breath at the computer, just for bruce to whisper ominously ‘yes i am.’ 

When Steph said it, full of anger and hate and sadness and fear, bruce just followed her and said “you're right. Im not your father. And i will never be your father. But, if you'll let me, id like to be better.” After that any time steph said ‘ur not my father’ bruce would just respond with ‘never will be’

Cass said “your are my father” and left no room for argument

Babs said “ur not my dad or my father or even close to being any of it, but you are my mom.” bruce just had to accept that

When damian said it bruce just stood there for a solid fifteen minutes rebooting. Dick and jason fell out of their chairs laughing. 

Duke specifically went “ur my dad! My dad! Boogie woogie woogie!’ and bruce was just like ‘bet aight.”

[aeturnum-mendacacium]

As Bruce grows older into his 50's or 60's the paparazzi and people crowding him becomes less and he thinks that people have finally decided that Bruce is too old to be attractive or mainstream and he's actually super fine with it and makes jokes( more like sarcastic remarks) about it. But in reality they've grown more freaky cause instead of looking wrinkly and a sappy old man the level of cunt he serves grows everyday,he doesn't look like a snack he looks like a buffet, 13 year olds are using his pics as the cover pages of their mafia wattpad stories, he looks majestic, absolute dilf, we don't talk about the amount of tags he's birthed just by ageing on ao3, and hes still an absolute UNIT, the reason he's not heard about it yet cause the batkids are blocking the shit OUT with all of their will and strength cause it doesn't matter if all of them are full grown adults they're still all like-THATSMYDADGETAWAYFROMHIMHEDOESN'THAVETIMEFORYOUHESBUSYBEINGOURDAD

[theredcuyo]

Was doing something unrelated but

Can you imagine a world where nobody knows the batkids are actually Batman's children and hence, when they hear them yelling at each other "I'll report this to Batman!" They think it's actually serious team discussion

And they don't know that for them it literally translates into "I'm telling dad!"

Like, You see Nightwing arguing with Red Hood and going "Oh, i'm SO reporting this to Batman"

"OH NO, YOURE NOT"

"YES I AM"

And everyone else thinks this is serious? And it could affect Hood's status as an ally?

But really is just Dick telling his little brother he's snitching about his broken arm to their dad-

Or you see Red Robin trying to bribe Robin and Spoiler "I'm reporting your actions to Batman"

"Yeah, gotta start the report about it, and he's going to be so-"

"... How much?"

And they smile maliciously, and anyone else thinks RR did something REALLY bad but it's just that he exceeded his weekly allowed coffee and his sibblings found out

Because they also do it to other people, like Tim does it to Supes when he's arguing with Kon-

[ghost-bxrd]

Prompt:

Jason insists on being the bait for a joint mission with the Bats. But the moment he starts “screaming” during the interrogation process, Batman calls the whole thing off and smashes right through the window and into the first thug.

Absolutely nobody is surprised by this development. Except Jason.

[snakeredbirdbatkatana]

Batkids calling Bruce when they need him.

Dick gets arrested for underage drinking call my dad now he's not in the slightest scared but he wants his dad. Bruce who already got bail done and is wrapping Dick in a blanket.

Jason crashes a car already on the phone with Bruce who is speeding to him.

Tim is falling asleep at the office and wants to go home dad please pick me up. Waking up tucked in Bruce's bed.

Damian gets in a fight at school you call my father right now. He suspended but Bruce hugs him on the way out.

Cass standing face to face with David Cain the man who should have been her father but isn't but before she can scream for Bruce she's wrapped in his cape.

Duke calling Bruce because the kids at school have never been nice to a kid from the wrong side of the tracks and getting ice cream just because.

Stephanie just calling Bruce to talk knowing no matter how busy he is there will be time for her.

Babs who even though Jim Gordon is a great man after a nightmare about the joker only wants one man. Bruce running in the middle of the night to her door. Wrapping his batgirl in his arms.

Kids who aren't afraid to call Dad. He wont be mad he wants them to call. To know he will drop everything to get to his boys, or his girls. Scared birds shouting for the big bad bat and he comes running.

[damiduck]

Damian, handing Bruce a piece of paper with a very neat calendar on it: father, I will be taking a step back from my participation in our nightly patrols. I have carefully considered factors such as, but not limited to, school tests, most likely days for breakouts and when other people will be available. Here is my schedule.

Bruce: any particular reason you are stepping back from Robin?

Damian: I have reached an acceptable age and am by far mature enough, so I will be participating in Ramadan this year, father. Afterwards I will pick my duties up as normal, but with changed sleeping and eating patterns, this is the most logical step for now.

Bruce, who grew up with a jewish mother and christian father who were intent to raise him on some weird mix of the two, then a second father who was atheist, proceeded to lose his entire way in any form of religion due to losing himself in his teen years, took in Jewish boy, then a catholic one with religious trauma, then an atheist one who had no idea how to even approach the idea of religion, followed up by a pagan girl and already making seven different mental lists of things he will need to research, how to add aspects of Islam into their weird family holidays and trying desperately to show his support for his son: ....hnn

Damian: thank you father

[batfamhastwitter]

A little mini update while I work on part 8! I just wanted to do a little explanation on jason's thought process and why he didn't tell people.

Prev ~ Beginning ~ Next

[spicy-apple-pie]

Dickie just gets emotional when it's on pain killers lol

Commission Info / Kofi

[crii-sis]

screaming crying throwing up

Batman: Curse of the White Knight (2019-2020) #8

[everwalldigan]

My favourite thing ever is when Jason is drawn to resemble Bruce because I KNOWW his ass would HATE it😭😭

Dick: hey Jason you haven’t forgotten our meet u— oh my god are you ok?? What happened?

Jason *rocking back and forth on the floor with a traumatised look in his eyes, whispering in horror* someone mistook me for Bruce in the grocery store today.

Random kid at a charity event pointing at Jason standing grumpily in a corner: who’s that?

Bruce (smiling fondly): that’s my son Jason!

Random kid: he looks like you! :D

Jason: *leaves the room*

Bruce (running after him): jason, Jason they didn’t mean anything by it, Jason, you’re going to jump off a balcony just because of a child’s observation Jason?

[versasfanficwastedump]

i think my favorite Dad!Bruce trait is when ppl make him so desperate to give his kids anything and everything. it’s such a dad thing to do, right?

you want some money? here’s five grand, no questions asked. i bought you this book, i thought you’d like it. i remembered you told me you like apples so there’s an orchard in the backyard now. you want to keep a cow back there too? yeah of course.

anything that is mine is yours. anything in the world can belong to you if you just ask me. i just want you to be happy. i want to show i love you.

[haveihitanerve]

Okay but the Batkids using Dad with Bruce when they know hes been having a rough day-

Bruce comes back from a JL meeting upset, not because something went wrong but because they aren't acting like a team, and Dick jumps into his arms and crawls over his shoulders and drapes himself across his back and is like “dad! You're home!” and suddenly bruce feels better

Or Bruce excuses himself from a Gala, pissed off because someone whispered his kids are just charity cases he uses to get publicity and Cass slips into the room through a vent and hugs hims from behind murmuring, “its okay daddy. We know the truth.”

~alternatively~

The batkids calling bruce dad when they've had a bad day because they have to make conscious effort to call him bruce and when they are just exhausted and done its too much effort to not call him dad-

Jason storms into the manor, pissed off after finding a woman who took drugs and killed herself and left her daughter alone, and slumps onto the couch. Bruce notices and comes over with a cup of tea and one of jasons favorite books, presses a kiss to his forehead and covers him with a blanket and jason murmurs a quiet “thanks dad” before relaxing with his book

Or Tim has spent four consecutive days in the Cave, only surviving off of coffee and spite and Bruce finally snaps, grabbing him in a blanket and burritoing him and carrying him to his room and spoon feeding him alfred food and Tim is so exhausted he just mutters “thanks dad.” before falling asleep

Or Steph is out on patrol and she slips and her foot lands poorly and she screams in pain, hitting the ground, but in just a few seconds Batman is at her side, wrapping it for her and helping her to stand and as she sags against him she lets out a slightly pained, “thanks dad.” as he helps her to the batmobile.