#captain marvel

[imaginaryskeleton]

Jason isn't verified because he refuses to become officially alive again

The third post here is a follow up to this one

More batfam twitter shennanigans here

Taglist under the cut

@scarlettauthor @searchingforthelamps @aceisferal @lady-bizarre @nana-mizu-shiki @reality-itself-but-magic @humanoidluv @shortstorylover @luckybyrdrobyn @ginevraxrogers @universal-travel-er @timpendragon @limeskittlesaredecent @illburnyouontheceiling @half-emptyjuicebox @genderlessblomber @i-suc-at-art @somniphobicfox @ultra-stormsaga @procrastinators-folly @folk-ever-lore @marinafanning @sadbookworm13 @tzuyu132132 @sackofsadstuff @slythieamour-loves-her-guardian @notarobot-lastichecked @blankliferain @kking13 @blackholegladiator @formulaonebuff @blackstar-gazer @wrongwaykelly @smiling-through-sadness @cygnusdoesthings @lyninabin @justabilingualchileangirl @atlasaurelius @xxrougefangxx @fictional-love21 @kittyplayz1 @bae-graphomaniac @rusty-lake-resident @spawn0fsatan @savetheupholstery @lostsomewhereinthegarden @dead-potato-monster @its-a-dam-blue-brick @elamimax @ja50nt0ddwa5h3r3

Tag list continued in replies due to post limit

Request in the replies to be added to/removed from the tag list. No longer replying to each individual request due to the sheer amount of you but you will he added

[omniscient3teabag]

NEED there to be like, a party or something after an alien invasion and like someone brought alcohol to the watchtower and like usually captain marvel doesn't drink because ??? billy's like 10 alcohol tastes like absolute chicken butt to him but Zeus is like " drink drink drink " and the other gods(minus Solomon,, someone has to be the rational one there) join in and go " DRINK DRINK DRINK !!! " like they cheering for the Olympus world cup

and captain is like " eh ok sure " and decides to see how much alcohol he could drink in the span of 2 minutes or less. and so that spirals into almost every member of the Justice League witnessing THE Boy Scout™️—that no one has EVER saw drink a drop of wine—chugging down each glass like it's no tomorrow,,, and it's kinda impressive..

of course. captain stops (only because he didn't want to finish it all,,, plus the alcohol he just drank doesn't even taste like the rum from the 1950s,, so, even if it doesn't taste like chicken butt it still doesn't taste great either) but like hey at least the gods were having a blast!!! (they were a bit bummed captain had to stop though) (solomon felt like he could actually breath again after that)

and the jl??? respect the ever living shit out of him because god fucking damn captain marvel just walked off and continued whatever he was doing afterwards like he didn't just chug down fifty glasses of booze,, (he just doesn't have a liver or kidney to damage nor mind to get drunk off LMAOO)

and then they were like . huh. How much liquor can cap hold??? so they all get a bit curious .. and try to see how many more shots could he take ,,, and then it somehow just spirals into a long, nasty competition, one person just straight up bringing a barrel of rum for captain to try

and marvel?? he finds it kinda funny. the alcohol doesn't really affect him anyways and if he just turns off his taste buds he can pretend it's water most of the time. plus a good past time if there's nothing to do. but he does like giving out his thanks and reviews on the taste of it most times

,, and maybe the utmost eagerness that shows in Captain Marvel's face whenever a member wants him to try a very VERY strong concoction full of alcohol that'd probably kill a horse if a sip was taken by a normal civilian and how sincere he is on the way he pats their heads and gives out actual advice on how to improve it (thank you Solomon) was KINDA nice. just a tad bit nice.

oh who's pretending at this point, the competition at the end of the day just waters down into how many drinks??gifts??? the line blurs to a certain point ,, they could give to marvel and to see how many compliments they could get from marvel. they all know at this point that the drinks can't really affect him anyways. plus plus!!! captain would give the extra rum leftover into a tiny-ish water bottle made of magic and brings it with him everywhere, strapped to his waist like fanny pack. no one questions this. we love you capdad

(most of the gods living rent free in cm's head fucking cheer when one day billy gets gifted booze that could affect the gods)

[ihavethreetimdrakeblogs]

consider: narcoleptic billy. hypnos favours him bc of this and grants him a boon. the ability to walk through dreams.

without telling billy of course

[colossrat]

Marvel "cast" a something pt 2

flash: the villain is very strong and we don't have the physical strength to face him, we need magic, but all the normally requested magic users are incapacitated!

hal: hey, cap! You have magic, don't you? Can't you do a spell that immobilizes the villain, or weakens him so we can beat him?

marvel: aaaah, uh. sure.

marvel points a finger at the villain and stands still for a while, thinking.

marvel: I don't really know what to do, what kind of spell do I cast?

flash: I don't know, man! You are the magic guy here! just do something! conjure a magic sledgehammer, a crowbar, an anvil that will fall on his head, a big piano!! anything!

Hal: it could even be anemia, damn it!

Marvel: oh, I've had it once, it's really bad, we get really weak. OK!

Marvel redoes his wizard pose, a dark look on his face. the environment becomes cold, clouds begin to accumulate in the sky and strong winds hit the heroes.

Marvel: I CAST LACK OF VITAMIN B12 IN YOUR BLOOD

and the villain drops to the ground, pale, weak, unable to lift even a finger, he looks so tired, exhausted, lame, he has such a low immoral lack of vitamin in his blood right now

Flash: DUDE DID YOU ACTUALLY CAST ANEMIA ON HIM??! IS THIS POSSIBLE?

Hal wheezing: MAN. COULD YOU ALWAYS DO THESE THINGS? IS IT THAT EASY?!

Later, Batman will begin to shake with anxiety as he updates the captain's contingency file after reading reports of today's fight.

information… -apparently he can conjure any illness with just words.

Batman: …

Batman: does that include terminal illnesses…?

preventive measures to be taken… -discover a cure for cancer, preferably an instant cure. -create a utility belt with all the cures for all the diseases in the world.

Batman just sighs, fucking magic

pt 1 ?

[cowardlyrenren]

after rewatching shazam (2019) and watching shazam fury of the gods (2023), I'm pretty sure I'm parched for more billy batson content. everyone better spread out their billy batson fic collection and no batson shall get hurt.

in all seriousness I need billy batson x Percy Jackson, I need two of my interests to clash 🥀

[cakypa120]

Better, it's not only the Shazamfamily that is hyperfixeted in epic, the gods too, Zeus appears and sing "MY SON I'M FINALLY HOME" for Diana and de Shazamfamily, or some greek monsters attack and there's Shazamfamily singing a song the monster knows too...

The rest of the league thinks it's a god/monster thing that appeared after Diana left her island.

Epic has become popular. Even among the Gods and other beings.

Diana and Shazamily were in the Watchtower. They were at a game meeting to rally the members of the Marvel Family and the Justice League. Suddenly, the door opens. There stands a man who can destroy mountains. Diana immediately turns pale.

Zeus: I can only wonder what your world has been things you've had to suffer, and the strength you hold within

Diana: What is he saying?

Billy and Freddy: Oh...

Zeus: All I've ever wanted was to reunite with my own. Twenty years, we've wandered, but today you're not alone

Darla: I want to do it! I want to do it!

Zeus: My children, I'm finally home!!

Darla: *runs and hugs God*

Diana: *readies sword for harakiri*

Eugene: *stops Amazon from doing it*

The League: *tries not to pass out from all the divine power that's coming at them*

Superman: Mary Marvel, are you sure she's gonna help us?

Mary: Sure. She's a wonderful woman.

Flash: Didn't she turn people into pigs?

Mary: *shrugs*

Circe: Welcome to the best part of your lives!

Mary: Let's skip that part.

Circe: Okay(｡⁠◕⁠‿⁠◕⁠｡)

Circe and Mary (in unison): I've got people to protect, friends I can't neglect, so now there is no turning back, you've made your one wrong move, now you're done for!!

Flash: What the...

Superman: I don't know...

Circe and Mary: Not even a spell saves you, 'cause you're done for, oh, you better run or soon you will be done for!!

Flash: I want to live.

Arthur: We're entering a siren zone. Be careful.

Pedro: It'll be all right.

Siren: M~m.

Dina: Is that her?

Siren: Don't you miss me?

Pedro: *leans on the side* More than you know.

Siren: Then jump in the water and kiss me.

Pedro: My love, I've told you this before, you know I'm afraid of the water.

Siren: I'll make sure that you are safe and sound. Come play with me and our daughter and let's watch our love leave the ground.

Pedro: My love, why? You know I'm too shy and terrified!

Siren and Pedro: *start laughing*

Siren: I won't keep you! *blows a kiss*

Pedro: Thank you! *winks*

Arthur: WHAT THE FUCK?!

[artworkmartins]

#Earth199 — Engineered as Kree Protector on Earth, Noh-Varr has a mix of Kree and cockroach DNA. Awakening after the end of the Kree mission, he didn't have a purpose. Now, he journeys the cosmos as one of the Guardians of the Galaxy.

[wyvernsgale]

I’m honestly surprised at the lack of Bruce adopts Billy Batson ( Captain Marvel) fanfics. I’m pretty sure I’ve read like only 2-4 fics with him adopting Billy. I’m surprised there aren’t more.

Like, Billy is a black haired, blue eyed orphan, whose last name is literally Batson, Bat Son. He is adoption bait.

Bruce doesn’t know Captain marvel is a kid obviously. There are plenty of options for him meeting Billy and Billy having to hide he’s Captain Marvel.

[photography-poltergeist]

Billy-adopts-Conner-AU but they take forever to clarify Billy’s age.

~first meeting

Conner: so how old are you? I heard you were like 1,000,000.

Captain Marvel: oh! Holly Molly I was worrying about that, I’m only 8 years older than you and it’s pretty weird for humans to have parents that close in age so I wanted to make sure you were ok with that and stuff, I know the others signed it off because of Solomon and so it wouldn’t be a problem technically but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable and…

Conner, mentally logging his age as 24: I don’t care. It’s not a problem.

—

Conner doesn’t see him much outside of home unless he has to be at a school event or an occasional outing which requires someone to pay for things and Billy doesn’t transform at home because he doesn’t want to cause property damage and due to past Batman-related experiences doesn’t want routine lighting strikes at his doorstep.

—

Conner: What is your job anyway?

Billy: I work at Wiz radio

Conner- not recognizing his voice and assuming he’s backstage: okay.

—

Billy: great news, it’s my birthday!

Conner, confused: I thought you didn’t celebrate yours?

Billy: Yeah, but this time it’s special, I can legally adopt you- I mean of course Batman’s already made that happen but it’s still cool, right?

Conner, doing mental math: …Aren’t you 34 today?

Billy, freshly 18:

I think we had a misunderstanding..

[fandomnerd9602]

Thora and Carol continue arguing…

Thora: Y/N is the mightiest hero in the cosmos, he should have a lover of equal power

Carol: which is me

Thora: no it is I

Y/N, a Kryptonian, floats down…

Y/N: Thora, Carol, I’m not sure about what the argument is but you are both intelligent and beautiful without compare. Surely it can be solved with an agreement…

Both women look each other…

Thora: share?

Carol: I can share

For @kratoswrathofmidgard

[yourfavisbeingmicrowaved]

CAROL DANVERS is being microwaved

requested by: @cha0ticlesbian

[omniscient3teabag]

au where the suspendium popped when clark had JUST started hero-ing and captain wanted to see who's protecting all the other cities in the country and this is the first time he's talked to superman. he doesnt know lil vros clark,, 💔 the gods do tho and takes advantage of that by giving superman a heart attack

my drawing pen got lost so i went back to my roots and used a mouse to draw this LMAOO its not my best work but its something

[toobytoobs]

Captain Marvel: “so today- shut the FUCK UP Zeus!! No one cares!”

*distant sound of a thunderclap in the background*

Captain Marvel: “anyway, as I was saying, Ms. Beautia has donated-“

billy (as captain marvel) has to give a speech at a gallery opening and the gods are arguing over something silly. billy, annoyed, accidentally responds to it mid speech, getting into the argument himself. unfortunately the event is being broadcasted

it quickly goes viral

random internet user: LMAO WHO IS CAP ARGUING WITH DID HE FORGET HES ON LIVESTREAM [1:45 PM] other internet user: nevermind that did he forget he was mid speech?! [1:46 PM]

clark kent, one of the reporters covering the opening, looks on in disbelief

[colossrat]

GL: You know, I heard that every time you smoke a cigarette, it's you giving Satan a blowjob.

John Constantine with third cigarette in hand: I gave Lucifer Morningstar a blowjob once.

Captain Marvel: DUDE. GROSS.

Constantine: Oh… Cap-- I forgot you were here, sorry. Forget I said anything

Marvel: I WISH! Oh my Gods, I'm going to hit my head on some walls til i erase this fact of my mind. Mary Christ!! HES LIKE, MY UNCLE UR-- oh i need to throw up--

Batman: Hmn

[cowardlyrenren]

I think they're getting along💚

pov: my favorite characters