#incorrect quotes gen

[absolutely-tru-drag-race-quotes]

La Grande Dame: Life is like Marina. It's short.

[frownyalfred]

Roy: having the Bats as friends is so weird. I was crying and they just told me to “lock in”

Oliver:

Roy: and then I did

[dickgraysonmybeloved]

Batman at a weekly debrief with the batfam: And, as always, here's your weekly reminder that therapy and other psychiatric services are covered by Wayne healthcare. Robins, past present and other: Red Robin, whispering to Black Bat: Is he looking at me or Hood this time?

inspo

[iamnmbr3]

Diary Tom Riddle: We have so much in common! Both half-bloods-

Harry: Both my parents were magical so not really but ok.

Diary Tom Riddle: Both orphans.

Harry: My parents died because of Voldemort...

Diary Tom Riddle: Mine too! What are the chances?

Harry: ... (-_-)

Diary Tom Riddle: It's like we're soulmates.

Harry: Funny you should say that.

[incorrectbatfam]

I need Dick's reactions to Gen Alpha Dami and Jon, maybe if he's babysitting or chaperoning them both or smth? Thank you!

Damian: Grayson, my friends are coming over.

Dick: I'll run down to the gas station for some snacks.

Damian: Tt. That's nothing but chemically treated junk peddled by megacorporations who fund deforestation and violate human rights at the cost of our health and taxpayer dollars.

Dick: Well we don't have much at home so I'll take you out to eat.

Dick, muttering as he leaves: Deforestation and taxpayer dollars...

———————

Damian: Grayson, these are my friends. You already know Jon, Colin, and Billy. Meet Maya, Maps, Kathy, and Suren. Guys, this is my fossil of a brother, Richard.

Dick: I'm only 27!

Maya: 2024 minus 27...

Maya: You were born in the 1900s.

———————

[in the car]

Dick: So, Kathy, where are you from?

Kathy: *stifles a laugh*

Kathy: Ohio.

The kids: *high five*

———————

[at the arcade]

Dick: They're charging four tokens to play Doodle Jump? I played this for free on the school iPads in junior high.

Colin: Inflation.

Dick: How about your game, Suren?

Suren, wearing VR glasses: *whacks Dick with a plastic sword*

———————

[at the prize counter]

Maps: I'll take that.

Maps: *points to a box*

Dick: What is it?

Maps: I don't know. It's a mystery. Now record me doing an unboxing for my gacha channel.

———————

[at the pizza parlor]

Dick: Where's the menu?

Damian: It's the QR code on the table.

Billy: Mine's not loading.

Maps: Womp womp.

Dick: Here, we can use a print one.

Billy: *tries to zoom in on paper*

———————

[at home]

Bruce: How was your day? Did you have fun?

Jon: Yeah. We even saw an influencer at the thrift store on the way back.

Damian: Tt, more like a they/them catboy Karen.

Bruce: That's... nice?

Bruce: *looks to Dick for an explanation*

Dick: *shrugs*

[irondadspiderson4evr]

Ah yes… Peter…

Peter, in the lab: Mr stark, are we cooking today or what!

Tony: Peter, we aren’t… in the kitchen?

—-

Peter: Mr. Stark, you’re girly pop!

Tony: … What?

—-

Tony: how are you feeling webs?

Peter, after a battle, in the med bay: Mother trucker dude, that hurt like a butt cheek on a stick!

Tony, concerned: What… does that mean?

Sam, laughing: Watch your profanity!

Steve and Bucky, confused: What the hell?

—-

Tony, his hands busy, handing over a piece of paper: Pete, can you read this to me?

Peter: actually, I never learned how to read.

—-

Natasha, fighting Peter on his homework: If you don’t do your work you’re going to end up at McDonald’s-

Peter: we goin’ to McDonalds if I don’t do my work?

—-

The avengers having a summer party

Tony: Peter what do you have-

Peter: A KNIFE!

Tony: WHAT? NO-

—-

Peter: So I was sitting there, BBQ sauce on my titties…

Tony: Peter you don’t have- what?

@spiderman-is-me

[nari-kami]

GIRLBOSS, GATEKEEP,

GEN ASAGIRI💜

[apollodarling-writes]

thinking about task force 141 + könig with a gen z! reader.

tws : some suggestive themes but nothing explicit, cursing, ghost has no problem with the reader slapping his ass pls don’t mistake it as being nonconsensual

edit : it’s come to my attention that some of you are confused as to why i made a post like this. this post was made to be satirical and cringey and embarrassing. i am part of gen z and using the terminology that was all the rage in recent years to make something like this. it’s not a serious post. it’s made to appear the way it appears.

reader, walking past soap : youre looking very submissive and breedable today, johnny.

soap, shaking his head and tutting : i am not!

reader : big talk for someone within breeding distance.

ghost, trying to make a cup of coffee :

reader who takes notice of ghost’s ass and slaps it : god damn! i knew you had jiggle physics

ghost, slowly setting down his cup and turning his head : i’m giving you a five second headstart.

reader realizing they fucked up : oh shit.

reader knocking on price’s office door : knock knock! can i enter, captain price?

price, trying to finish his stack of paperwork and knows reader is up to something : …sure

reader : this is a vibe check! what do you think of this?

price, glancing between the picture and reader : … its nice.

reader whose eyes light up : you, my good sir, have officially passed the vibe check and that is why you’re my favorite captain.

price, exasperated : im your only captain.

ghost talking to soap : johnny, you ever feel… lost?

reader suddenly appearing with stress balls and plushies : here, these help me! this weighted stuffed animal hits different, so i recommend it personally.

ghost :

soap : where the hell did you even come from??

reader posing for a picture with the team before a mission : and everybody say “in our special ops era”!

the team, sullenly : in our special ops era…

reader : damn guys, this lighting is doing wonders for our dark circles.

könig trying to carve something for reader: hmm.. this side looks a little bit off…

reader bounding over to könig : heyy babygirl!

könig scrambling to hide it : scheiße, i thought they were busy!

[frappegoddess]

In order to connect with his children, Bruce thought to adopt Gen-Z /Gen Alpha type slang, unfortunately, he sought out help from said children, the worst decision of all, asking Steph.

-----------------------------------

Steph, with a detailed powerpoint presentation at hand: Ate means that someone slayed really hard, they did a great job at something so they ate-

Bruce, taking down notes furiously: Can you go back to what slayed means? As well as skeebeedee toilet???

-----------------------------

Then next day -

Bruce: So...Damian, rizzed up any level ten gyatts yet?

Damian: Father, may I inquire as to the nature of the malady that presently afflicts you?

------------------------------

Bruce, driving Duke to school: You studied hard for that exam, you'll be fine

Duke: Yeah I know, I hope I don't flunk.

Bruce, nonchalantly: You'll cook the exam, you'll eat and leave no crumbs I'm sure of it :)

Duke: *Does a double take leaving the car*

----------------------------

Cass: *Showing off her new pointe shoes to the fam*

Bruce, without looking up from his newspaper: Pop off queen

---------------------------

Jason: The only reason I come back here is for Alfred's cucumber sandwhiches.

Bruce: Straight facts

Jason, glaring daggers at Steph: Oh god.

--------------------------

Bruce, thinking smash means to 💀 someone: I high key wanna smash Superman.

The batkids: WHATTTTTT

[hoshinamylove]

Demons

Gen: We all have our demons Gen pointing at Senku who is mixing chemicals together: This one is mine

[demigod-shenanigans]

A demigod who comes by the Waystation and needs their magic item fixed: I’m looking for Valdez?

Jason: Here

Demigod: …the other Valdez

Sofía: Here!

Demigod: …the one who can actually fix my magic item?

Sofía: *pouting* you didn’t even let us try

[absolutely-tru-drag-race-quotes]

Dame: When we get back, I'm going to step on you! Marina: Okay, as much as I might enjoy that, Dame–

[sirenaex]

Riddle: Yuu, are you an alcoholic?

Yuu: No, not yet.

Riddle: Oh thank goodne- WHAT DO YOU MEAN YET?!

Yuu: Hey, I'm still young, give me time.

Riddle: I will not give you time- Yuu get back here!

[dickgraysonmybeloved]

Jason, laying in the lounge, bat boys sleep over (duke couldn’t join them): do you think cows like to sing?

Tim, on his phone definitely not sleeping: it's 3am, go back to sleep

Jason, defensive: they can moo, so they must be good at opera!

Dick, who’s secretly been awake starts mooing opera style, it’s awful:

Damian, shaking awake: WHERE'S THE COW-

[iamnmbr3]

Diary Tom Riddle: I shall now kill you with this giant snake that only I can control because only I speak-

Harry in Parseltongue: Guess what I can do?

Diary Tom Riddle: Even if you speak Parseltongue only I contain part of the soul of Lord Voldemort, the true Heir of Slytherin.

Harry: You're never going to believe this, but guess what?

[incorrectbatfam]

Kinda cursed but do you think gen alpha Damian says "chat" when he is using the commons? Like everyone trying to talk at the same time or just doing their own business and the voice of a 10 year old child saying "chat I think I see someone here"

(my cousin says "chat" a lot and now I can't live alone with this thought about Damian Wayne saying "chat")

*something goes wrong*

Damian: Womp womp, chat, we have a gyatt skill issue.