#fuck it up kid
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
*distant cooing*
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
the thing about Professor Utonium is he didn't accidentally create 3 daughters, he purposely created 3 daughters who accidentally have superpowers. the sugar, spice, and everything nice was intentional, only Chemical X was an accident
this guy became a girl dad on purpose and I am so proud of him for achieving his dream!
#either that or he supremely fucked up a cake recipe what am i psychic#powerpuff girls#or maybe he was aiming for one kid and got triplets instead. but that's how all triplets happen. that's just parenthood
30K notes
·
View notes
Text
the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.
when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."
but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.
now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.
the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.
but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."
the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.
but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?
because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!
and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.
#spilled ink#writeblr#warm up#this is an incredibly difficult idea to express#but i basically keep watching the same timelooped interaction:#someone makes tradwife content where she's like ''i think it's SO sad when ppl don't have kids EW''#and then the response is ''... go fuck yourself? i think ur life is miserable and bad ?"#and instead of being like ''oh we are all under capitalism huh''#the response is like ''you CANT say that. she made a CHOICE. she is ALLOWED to have KIDS and be HAPPY#unlike YOU who is UNHAPPY bc you don't have KIDS.''#like .... these are people who will throw the first stone. and then when you lob one back#they ask why you're so violent. they tell you that you're a bad activist.#and you're like. PARDON????? you implied being a woman meant i need to submit to my husband???#and they're like - well it's just my belief. so what if i'm invalidating your entire identity.
11K notes
·
View notes
Text
are we still doing this because i have a late submission
#🐉#this is less about fan content and more about that awful lazy one size fits all#'10 years later theyre happily married with a cute little nuclear family' trope#because ive read some genuinely incredible fics about characters who would Not fucking have kids#ending up with accidental pregnancy scares or child acquisitions that get treated with all the nuance#and thoughtful handling they deserve#but also. i reread one of my favourite fics yesterday and when one character jokingly brought up the idea of children#and the other reacted with genuine visceral disgust and said what hideously awful parents theyd be#i lit up like a fucking christmas tree
30K notes
·
View notes
Text
being a manager sucks balls half the time but the cashier kids im in charge of trust me enough to dick around in front of me so ive been keeping a running list of the shit they say that makes me laugh randomly: -"guys, is it cheating if you play fortnite with your ex" [4 seperate others, immediately]: "YES" -"there must be like… infinite sentences" -"bro what bro what the fuck bro what's that mean bro why'd you say that bro what" <distraught response to a girl randomly greeting him with 'hey there big boy' in an old timey transatlantic news reporter accent
#personal#text#gonna miss these kids lol#theres more i cant remember rn but i swear to god some of them do it just to make me crack up when im the only one in charge#infinite sentences kid and bro what the fuck kid are the same kid#he could not give less of a shit about this job it's so fucking funny
67K notes
·
View notes
Text
Macaque spent the whole season Big-Damn-Hero-ing and was NOT happy about it xD
#lmk season 5 spoilers#lmk spoilers#lmk season 5#lego monkie kid#lmk#macaque#liu'er mihou#six eared macaque#sun wukong#monkey king#qi xiaotian#mk#li jing#anyone else find it interesting that in english the 'macaque' part of his name comes first#but in chinese the 'six-ears' part comes first? so the way he's called by name in the different dubs has slightly different vibes#i can't quantify 'em tho :/ am not a vibeologist#Macaque was this season's biggest GOAT#like he's very petty about it but he cares about mk and swk SO. MUCH.#(well ok the petty is mostly aimed at swk)#which: fair#POV: everything is going to shit and you are currently the only celestial monkey NOT being re-traumatized or gaslight by celestial beings#macaque's gonna start rolling up to beach parties with a shirt that says:#I Saved The Monkey King's Arse Several Times And All I Got Was An Almost-Hand-Holding-Moment And This Stupid Shirt#MK NOOOOOOOOO#im a fucking wreck that's their KID. he's their BOY. their little BRO HE'S THEIR KID OKAY AND THEY LOVE HIM ENOUGH TO FISTFIGHT THE GODS#which i guess is a little easier since they can win those fights actually#not explicitly shadowpeach#but oh it is there. lurking. waiting to strike#lion king reference! :D
9K notes
·
View notes
Text
splat 2 sketch comic for the starving agent 4 fans (me)
#clarifying right here right now NONE of this is shipping#pls dont interpret any of this as shipping#anyway i think people dont explore marie and agent 4's dynamic enough#marie is shown to be very caring and I hc agent 4 remind her a lot of callie once they open up to marie#so naturally marie is going to be doting as fuck towards this kid#implied angst of marie missing her cousin and seeing her in agent 4#my art#splatoon 2#splatoon#agent 4#marie splatoon#callie splatoon#also splatoon 2 storymode is more irrelevant now than Ever so this is kinda bad timing lmao
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
First night at Grunkle Ford's! Running away <3
Ford thought the twins were in danger or smth and busted clean through the door, this man has absolutely 0 chill 💀
#Dipper and Mabel entering Grunkle Ford's shack covered head to toe in demonic rituals and (probably) fake blood sacrifices: oh-#maybe we Shouldn't Stay#Ford: oh no the kids are in danger :( I gotta save them!#the twins: fucking RUN#he chases them halfway through the woods before he finally manages to catch up to them and apologize#my art#gravity falls#gravity falls au#HWINEBHABWNAJCAHOWEEATOWEUB AU#stanford pines#ford pines#grunkle ford#dipper pines#mabel pines
7K notes
·
View notes
Text
Viago: Teia and I are having a baby.
Rook: That's gre-
Viago, slamming adoption papers on the table: It's you, sign here
#incorrect quotes#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#dragon age veilguard#da4#datv#viago de riva#teia cantori#teia and viago basically raised my rook#teia x viago#crow rook#rook de riva#don’t get it twisted though teia is forcing this interaction to occur#teia and viago looking at the most fucked up scraggly looking kid in the world: that one. we’re taking that one.
3K notes
·
View notes
Text
Jason is just making fun of Phantom over the phone outside of a JL meeting in the watch tower. He keeps calling him out and taking the piss, saying Phantom won’t do shit cause the JL are there.
The entire League are just staring at each other and Batman silently and awkwardly and they hear Red Hood mock someone saying “shove that in your grave, oh wait you didn’t get one” and losing it.
Eventually Red Hood comes back in still crying from laughter under his hood after that 40 minute call. Just as the JL are about to restart they just hear a banging from the space window(?!)
Everyone turns to see a feral looking 14-15 years cussing up a storm so bad even Constantine flinches(how can they hear someone talking when they are in space how are they just there?!?).
Only to hear Red Hood go “Oh Shit” and dead sprint out the room as the teen phases through the window and chases after him saying something about a Creep Bat (Flash asks if he missed another Bat Kid, Batman refuses.)
#Batman is bluescreening trying to figure out if he adopted another child and forgot#also isn’t it usually Jason trying to kill the new Robin/kid not the other way??#Superman mentally gave up as soon as Red Hood entered the Watchtower#at Simone point Constantine realises who the fuck that was ans has a crisis#Captain Marvel is laughing because of course Danny would pull this shit that petty petty bit h#dp x dc fanfic#dp x dc prompt#dc#dp#danny phantom#dcxdp#jason todd#justice league
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
probably time for this story i guess but when i was a kid there was a summer that my brother was really into making smoothies and milkshakes. part of this was that we didn't have AC and couldn't afford to run fans all day so it was kind of important to get good at making Cool Down Concoctions.
we also had a patch of mint, and he had two impressionable little sisters who had the attitude of "fuck it, might as well."
at one point, for fun, this 16 year old boy with a dream in his eye and scientific fervor in heart just wanted to see how far one could push the idea of "vanilla mint smoothie". how much vanilla extract and how much mint can go into a blender before it truly is inedible.
the answer is 3 cups of vanilla extract, 1/2 cup milk alternative, and about 50 sprigs (not leaves, whole spring) of mint. add ice and the courage of a child. idk, it was summer and we were bored.
the word i would use to describe the feeling of drinking it would maybe be "violent" or perhaps, like. "triangular." my nose felt pristine. inhaling following the first sip was like trying to sculpt a new face. i was ensconced in a mesh of horror. it was something beyond taste. for years after, i assumed those commercials that said "this is how it feels to chew five gum" were referencing the exact experience of this singular viscous smoothie.
what's worse is that we knew our mother would hate that we wasted so much vanilla extract. so we had to make it worth it. we had to actually finish the drink. it wasn't "wasting" it if we actually drank it, right? we huddled around outside in the blistering sun, gagging and passing around a single green potion, shivering with disgust. each sip was transcendent, but in a sort of non-euclidean way. i think this is where i lost my binary gender. it eroded certain parts of me in an acidic gut ecology collapse.
here's the thing about love and trust: the next day my brother made a different shake, and i drank it without complaint. it's been like 15 years. he's now a genuinely skilled cook. sometimes one of the three of us will fuck up in the kitchen or find something horrible or make a terrible smoothie mistake and then we pass it to each other, single potion bottle, and we say try it it's delicious. it always smells disgusting. and then, cerimonious, we drink it together. because that's what family does.
#this is true#writeblr#warm up#relatedly for some reason one of our Favorite Jokes#amongst the Siblings#is like - ''this is so good u will love it''#while we are reacting to something we OBVIOUSLY find viscerally disgusting#like we will be actively retching and be like ''nooooo it's so good''#to the point that i sometimes get nervous if someone outside my family is like oh u should try it its good#(obvi we never force each other to eat anything. we are all just curious birds and#like. we're GONNA try the new thing.)#edit to answer why we had so much vanilla:#my mom is a very good cook and we LOVE to bake. so she just had a lot of staples in the house.#it's one of those things that's like. have u ever continuously thought ''ah i should get butter im probably out''#even tho u are not out of butter. so u end up with like 5 years of butter.#my mom would do that in a costco but like with vanilla extract#to be fair we WERE always using WAY TOO MUCH bc we were kids#so like she was right to stock up#ps. yes we were VERY sick after this lol i just didn't want to include it in the post in case ppl had an ick about that#u can tell it's real bc we knew "oh no we fucked up that's too much vanilla to waste'' but our reaction was to just. keep drinking it#> sibling understanding that vanilla extract isn't free > knowledge mother doesnt mind if we use it for milkshakes#> sibling choice to maybe get in a loophole of ''not wasting it'' if we drink it bc that's the same as using it (not throwing it out)#listen bud i was like 13 and my sister was like 9#when my mom discovered this we. got in. A LOT. of trouble. a lot of it. a LOT of it.#3rd edit bc i guess it isn't clear - i am 1 of my brother's 2 little sisters#i am the middle child#out of all the ways i have had to explain a post before being like ''did u forget a middle child can happen'' is my favorite
62K notes
·
View notes
Text
Learning that fans hated Applejack and called her "boring" is crazyyy to me because I genuinely, unironically believe AJ's the most complex character in the main six.
Backstory-wise, she was born into a family of famers/blue collar workers who helped found the town she lives in. She grew up a habitual liar until she had the bad habit traumatized outta her. She lost both her parents and was orphaned at a young age, having to step up as her baby sister's mother figure. She's the only person in the main gang who's experienced this level of loss and grief (A Royal Problem reveals that AJ dreams about memories of being held by her parents as a baby). She moved to Manhattan to live with her wealthy family members, only to realize she'll never fit in or be accepted, even amongst her own family. The earlier seasons imply she and her family had money problems too (In The Ticket Master, AJ wants to go to the gala to earn money to buy new farm equipment and afford hip surgery for her grandma).
Personality-wise, she's a total people-pleaser/steamroller (with an occasional savior complex) who places her self worth on her independence and usefulness for other people, causing her to become a complete workaholic. In Applebuck Season, AJ stops taking care of herself because of her obsessive responsibilities for others and becomes completely dysfunctional. In Apple Family Reunion, AJ has a tearful breakdown because in she thinks she dishonored her family and tarnished her reputation as a potential leader –– an expectation and anxiety that's directly tied to her deceased parents, as shown in the episode's ending scene. In The Last Roundup, AJ abandons her family and friends out of shame because believes she failed them by not earning 1st place in a rodeo competition. She completely spirals emotionally when she isn't able to fulfill her duties toward others. Her need to be the best manifests in intense pride and competitiveness when others challenge her. And when her pride's broken, she cowers and physically hides herself.
Moreover, it's strongly implied that AJ has a deep-seated anger. The comics explore her ranting outbursts more. EQG also obviously has AJ yelling at and insulting Rarity in a jealous fit just to hurt her feelings (with a line that I could write a whole dissection on). And I'm certain I read in a post somewhere that in a Gameloft event, AJ's negative traits are listed as anger.
Subtextually, a lot of these flaws and anxieties can be (retroactively) linked to her parents' death, forcing her to grow up too quickly to become the adult/caregiver of the family (especially after her big brother becomes semiverbal). Notice how throughout the series, she's constantly acting as the "mom friend" of the group (despite everything, she manages to be the most emotionally mature of the bunch). Notice how AJ'll switch to a quieter, calmer tone when her friends are panicking and use soothing prompts and questions to talk them through their emotions/problems; something she'd definitely pick up while raising a child. Same with her stoicism and reluctance at crying or releasing emotions (something Pinkie explicitly points out). She also had a childhood relationship with Rara (which, if you were to give a queer reading, could easy be interpreted as her first 'aha' crush), who eventually left her life. (Interestingly enough, AJ also has an angry outburst with Rara for the same exact reasons as with EQG Rarity; jealous, upset that someone else is using and changing her). It's not hard to imagine an AJ with separation anxiety stemming from her mother and childhood friend/crush leaving. I'm also not above reading into AJ's relationship with her little sister (Y'all ever think about how AB never got to know her parents, even though she shares her father's colors and her mother's curly hair?).
AJ's stubbornness is a symptom of growing up too quickly as well. Who else to play with your baby sister when your brother goes nonverbal (not to discount Big Mac's role in raising AB)? Who else to wake up in the middle of the night to care for your crying baby sister when your grandma needs her rest? When you need to be 100% all the time for your family, you tend to become hard-stuck with a sense of moral superiority. You know what's best because you have to be your best because if you're aren't your best, then everything'll inevitably fall apart and it'll be your fault. And if you don't know what's best –– if you've been wrong the whole time –– that means you haven't been your best, which means you've failed the people who rely on you, which means you can't fulfill your role in the family/society, which makes you worthless . We've seen time and time again how this compulsive need to be right for the sake of others becomes self-destructive (Apple Family Reunion, Sound of Silence, all competitions against RD). We've seen in The Last Roundup how, when no longer at her best, AJ would rather remove herself from her community than confront them because she no longer feels of use to them.
But I guess it is kinda weird that AJ has "masculine" traits and isn't interested in men at all. It's totally justified that an aggressively straight, misogynistic male fandom would characterize her as a "boring background character." /s
At the time of writing this, it's 4:46AM.
#mlp#yeah i wrote this last night during insomnia.#yeah i know an embarrassing amount of crap about this kids show#but whatever it's my hyperfixation i'll store as much useless information as i want!!!#i'm gay and neurodivergent i have an excuse#in case you needed more proof that aj's my favorite character#personal#delete later#unless you like this analysis stuff#i get why they didn't reveal aj's parent's death until way later and why they didn't do much with it but i wish they did#cuz narratively there could've been so much material with aj's grief. like. i feel like we gloss over the fact that she lost her#mother and father as a teenager#i tried keeping my personal hcs out of this to keep it unbiased#but i'll put some in the tags#involving rarijack –– i think aj can be (but not always) very self-conscious about her relationship with rarity#anxieties that she's not the right fit or that rarity will move away and leave her some day or that another woman will take her attention#(like in rollercoaster of friendship?? nudge nudge??). basic seperation anxiety stuff#long post#regarding applebloom whenever i think about her and her parents i think about that scene in steven universe where steven looks up at#a portrait of his mother and openly wonders what kind of sack lunches she would've made for him. that episode still fucks me up
7K notes
·
View notes
Text
ok let me tell you what happened this episode
so basically..
#really charles? you left me with your kids to go and fuck a bird lady? SHUT UP!#cherik#charles xavier#erik lehnsherr#magnus#magneto is right#magneto#professor x#x men#x men 97
6K notes
·
View notes
Text
ok but that kid Mobius couldn’t prune was Loki right. like, that was Loki right. The brothers at the dock. That was Loki and Thor right. It was Loki
Mobius couldn’t kill Loki, chose his burden, and dedicated his life to him instead.
Mobius’s story started and ended with Loki. It had to be Loki.
#loki spoilers#loki#loki season 2#lokius#mobius m mobius#LIKE#IM STILL WRAPPING MY HEAD AROUND THE FACT THAT HE WAS A HUNTER#AND NOW WE FIND OUT HES NOT BC HE COULDNT KILL A KID#HELLO#WE CHOOSE OUR BURDENS HE SAYS#HE CHOSE TO STICK TO HIS HUMANITY#THE SAME HUMANITY HE SEES IN LOKI#GRIPS SERIES#WHY DO MY GAY MEN ALWAYS END UP SEPARATED#FUCK#I NEED THE REST#WHERES THE REEEEEESST
8K notes
·
View notes
Text
stop trying to be moe bro you old as dirt
#grow the fuck up#he’s so embarrassing#stand up bro you’ve got a wife and kids#dungeon meshi#delicious in dungeon#chilchuck#dunmeshi#chilchuck tims
4K notes
·
View notes
Text
Let me tell you their duo WASNT something I expected to see. Like. Ever. Oh my god ahahaha
#maccadam#transformers#spoilers#earthspark spoilers#prowl#tfe prowl#tf earthspark#megatron#tfe megatron#let me tell you a funny story#I have a friend who loves Megs#and when we started watching season 3 and Prowl showed up#and immediately him and Megatron started insulting each other#we both were like#your son is hurting my son 😑#but then when the last episode happened#it felt like we both were proud moms of two dumb kids#when Prowl hugged Megatron we both went fucking cheering l o u d
2K notes
·
View notes