#dick of the year

[generalelectionmusings]

[what-thisiscrazzzy]

Bad photo I took of my tv of Suella Braverman accidentally accepting the dick of the year award from The Last Leg

My attempt at cleaning up the image:

[fanaticalthings]

Bruce Wayne except he texts like an ominous boomer

wdym you can't tell if he's threatening them?

Based on this post by @mysterycitrus :)

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Bonus:

Happy birthday, Tim 🥰

[freefallintothevoid]

Dick Grayson's unmatched success as a child vigilante makes a lot more sense when you remember the Court of Owls was a thing and that Dick was meant to be the next Grey Son.

There is no way that someone at Haly's Circus wasn't there keeping an eye on him while he grew up. A future weapon needs to be trained and monitored after all, and a circus, a place where weird skills are completely normal, is actually a great place to secretly train a child.

You know, just some knife tricks that translated really well into actual fighting. How to get out of restraints and pick locks while under a time limit. Death defying acrobatic stunts that coincidentally do wonders for parkouring. That sort of thing. Nothing that seems out of place for a boy growing up around circus performers to learn, but would literally any where else.

I mean, while I fully believe that most kids would want to kill the man responsible for their parents deaths, Dick was weirdly prepared to go through it. He tracked down Zucco with way more ease than any normal child should have too. He became the first child vigilante, for goodness sake. The first Robin! He only started getting formal training after he basically forced Bruce into it!

Bruce himself has no idea that this kind of competency in a child is unusual, considering he was much too blinded by the similarities between his and Dick's tragic orphanhoods.

Alfred is in a similar boat because he’s desensitized to weird children after he somehow managed to successfully raise Bruce 'The Batman' Wayne, so he doesn't clock the hyper-competency as abnormal either.

By the time the other batkids start popping up (Jason 'The Audacity' Todd, borderline-street rat with no fear) (Tim 'the greatest stalker in Gotham history' Drake, child genius, also bullied his way into becoming Robin) (Barbara 'raised by the only uncorrupt cop in gotham' Gordon) (Stephanie 'daddy issues and spite' Brown) (Duke 'Pretends he's the normal one and people believe him' Thomas) it's too late.

It would also explain how Dick got along so well with Damian out of all of them. Similar childhood with different approaches and all that. On some subconscious level, Dick recognises and resonates with the murderous ten year old assassin with strong familial ties to a secret elite assassin organization.

It isn't until after the whole Court of Owls and Grey Son reveal that suddenly Dick realises a whole lot of things about his childhood that suddenly make a lot more sense.

[notrobinsomethingworse]

Dick (Nightwing) and Jason (Robin) stare at Bruce. One sports pleading eyes, the other a shit eating grin. There’s a child between them with black hair and blue eyes.

Bruce, he doesn’t know what’s happening but he doesn’t like it: No.

Dick, grinning: He’s our younger brother now.

Jason, nodding seriously: You’re not gonna take him from us.

Tim, got kidnapped while taking photos of patrol, just happy to be there: Where’s the Batcave?

Bruce: what.

Dick, grinning wider: He’s ours now.

[gffa]

PRAYER CIRCLE FOR BRUCE WAYNE TO SURVIVE RAISING THE MOST PERFECT CHILD EVER

[bruciemilf]

I think it’d be so funny if Bruce just refuses to disclose the existence of Robin to the league. He knows it’d take less than a minute for them to form a wicked mock club against him.

Except he just? Carries Robin around. Under that endless void that is his cape. Clark pinches the stress point between his brows. “Batman, is that a child under your cape?”

“No.”

“Bruce I can HEAR his heartbeat.”

“I think the long exposure to kryptonite partially damaged your brain. There is no child here, Clark.”

“He’s literally drinking Barry’s coffee right now.”

“He’s WHAT-“

[mysticalarmand]

Duke: Why is Dick sitting in between Jason and Roy?

Steph: Because he doesn't wanna see them cuddling.

Tim: Or kissing.

Duke: But they're a couple.

Tim: To Dick, Jason's still a baby.

Duke, holds up Damian: This is a baby, that's a grown ass adult.

[foolsocracy]

identity reveals are always fun

[everwalldigan]

Dick and Tim eating breakfast in silence:

Tim: so what was the Great Depression like

Dick: it was fine.

[allovesthings]

I love that Dick is pocket sized for both powered superheroes and as Robin, when he is a teeny little guy for the non-powered. It's very fun.

So here is three of my favorite way someone carried Dick:

Kitten! Dick taken by the scruff in Batman/Scarecrow Year one:

2. On the shoulder of Superman, looking like he is having the time of his life:

3. look at his shit-eating smile, i love him

[zooophagous]

I wish people understood more that animals go through puberty just like people do, and that "teen" animals will have new and often unpleasant behaviors as they grow and try and figure out their place in the world.

Many of the animals I see being rehomed are right at the one to two year old mark, when maturity is still an ongoing process and their behaviors get more intense. Be patient with them! They DO grow out of it!

Aster was a holy terror until he was almost 3 and now he's the best cat I've ever owned. If you can't deal with these changes, adopt a mature animal instead of getting a puppy or kitten, because it's more likely than not they will have a turbulent teen phase.

[massivetittiesandwarcrimes]

I need Dick to be completely delusional about Tim and consider him to be his nicest, most helpful, and most well-behaved sibling.

_____

Tim: I have never done anything wrong, ever, in my life.

Dick: I know this and I love you 🥰

Jason: ...Dick, are you fucking HIGH???

_____

Dick: You should consider trying to be more like Tim! He's always such a well-behaved angel ❤️

Tim: Thank you, Dick 😇

Damian:

________

Dick: Tim is very kind and always so polite! He would never be mean to someone on purpose! ❤️

Bruce, who is bullied by Tim an average of 4.5 times a day:

______

Dick: Tim is an absolute sweetheart!

Cass: ... I do not think that word means what you think it does.

_____

Duke, staring at a warehouse that he and Tim just 'accidentally' blew up: ... So how mad do you think Dick is going to be at us?

Tim: Don't worry, I got this.

Dick, landing next to them: Holy explosion, Red Robin! What happened here?!?

Tim: I don't know 😔. It was like this when we got here 🥺.

Duke, whispering: There is no way he's going to believe tha-

Dick: Oh no! Well, I'm just glad you two are safe!

Duke: ... Tim, I need you to teach me your ways.

Dick: hm? Did you say something, Duke?

________

Dick: I don't get it! Why does everyone think Tim is some kind of crazed feral gremlin?!?

Alfred: I believe that is because they have in fact met Master Tim.

Dick: What was that? 🙃

Alfred: ... 😮‍💨 Truly it is a mystery for the ages.

[violent138]

League members discussing meeting Robin at work:

"Compared to Bats, Robin was a total sweetheart. Ball of sunshine."

"Man, must've been a good day then, the kid I met was a real anklebiter. He pulled out a sword and everything."

"Anklebiter is harsh, the sweet boy I met barely said a word, he just kept asking about Themyscira and the lasso."

"He? I met a blonde girl."

"No, no, black haired boy with blue eyes. We're talking about Robin."

"Yeah same here, blue eyed and tanned."

"Pretty sure he had green eyes. And talked fancy. And kind of scolded me for time travelling."

"The child I met was paler than the moon."

"I'm telling you I met a girl, and she was Robin."

"Well... either we're all wrong or we're all right."

So they arrive at the conclusion that Bats has a shape-shifter for a kid.

[ashoss]

happy halloween from the batjust league

[gffa]

"A TORNADO IN SWEATPANTS" IS A PERFECT DESCRIPTION OF DICK GRAYSON <3