#okay but who would be Cass-
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Patrochilles Tangled AU… Achilles as Rapunzel, Patroclus as Flynn, Thetis Mother Gothel maybe??? That doesn’t fit perfectly but hm we can work with it I think! In any case like,,, banger idea, me
#patrochilles#the song of achilles#tangled#Patrochilles au#achilles and patroclus#achilles x patroclus#patroclus#achilles#au idea#rapunzel#flynn rider#okay but who would be Cass-#WAIT#ITS BRISEIS#CASS IS BRISEIS#I think#maybe?#it works#less well with the character dynamics bc flynn and cass don’t have the real dynamic#you get what I mean#hm I’ll have to rethink things
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When Steph and Cass get married they don’t take the last name Brown (Daddy Issues™️) or Cain (Daddy Issues Prime™️) or even Wayne (Steph absolutely REFUSES to become a Wayne nosirree), but a secret fourth thing (Gordan).
#BARBRA GORDON IS CASS’ MAMA AND TO AN EXTEND STEPH’S TOO OKAY#yes Steph still has Crystal but yall can NOT tell me she didnt lowkey look up to Babs as a secondary mom figure#the only one who is in on the jig is Kate bc shes officating the whole thing bc DUH and the way she fucken WHEEZZEEDDD when Steph explained#the way Kate would stand at the podium and anounce with such a smug grin#looking DIRECTLY at Bruce#‘I pronounce you…. MRS STEPHANIE AND MRS CASSANDRA GORDAN!’#the sheer fucken UPROARRRR#Steph LAUNCHES herself into Cass’ arms and kisses her senselessly as her now wife effortlessly carries her in a bridal carry#babs takes a second to process before instantly losing her NIND bc oh these crazy kids did NOT no no shes not crying#(she is. she so is. her date Dinah is handing her a hankerchief)#the batbros minus dami are hollering and cheering bc YEAHHHH STICK TO THE MANNNN#dami himself is dismissive and muttering about how could anyone throw away the wayne name like this#(on the inside he actually thinks this is pretty funny and must admit Barbra’s last name is a worthy rival to the Wayne name)#Bruce. Bruce is stunned. shell shocked. this girldad just lost his fav kid his princess#Jim is just having a damn good time bro is clapping Bruce on the back and having a good laugh over it all#also does this mean he has two honorary grandkids? no? well suck it bruce theyre my grandkids now#the other gothmanites who were invited like the birds of pret or the gotham city sirens are also all clowning on Brucie Boy#dc#stephcass#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#batfam
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the fact is, if varric lives (and that's an if bc maybe solas does kill him lmao idk how much to trust that minimap reveal) it IS weird that you can't customise a hawke or account for the decision because it would be a little weird if a man who has lived through a wannabe god + blight dragon attacking warden fortress has nothing to say about ghilan'nain and her blight dragon attacking a warden fortress, especially if he potentially lost his best friend (Hawke). It's not outlandish for people to be a little disappointed to not get some customisation there because the choices are not equal to varric. the loss of hawke is obviously a bigger impact on him than whichever warden is there. given varric's personality, it's not outlandish to expect him to talk about it with Rook either especially considering weisshaupt is a thing that happens in the game. if he dies beforehand it doesn't matter, but if he's going to be around? yeah you'd think he'd be talking about it here.
speaking of weisshaupt, A PLACE YOU GET TO GO, a hero of ferelden who made the ultimate sacrifice IS FUCKING INTERRED THERE. But it's just "whining" to expect a nod (esp one that you can customise so it's your hero of ferelden) i guess.
regardless of whether morrigan has mythal or not, who she is as a person does change based on whether she was romanced and whether she had a child. it is natural that this matters and people aren't stupid to be tentatively concerned that nothing of her history is "required" but she's apparently this important vip character who will have more involvement in the game than you expect. like you are allowed to ask: okay what does this mean, what will she be like, will she be the same character i've loved across multiple games?
people are allowed to be upset or concerned that a game series that historically took your choices and your decisions into account has watered that down to 3 choices when certain choices that WOULD impact characters that appear in THIS game aren't. (and to be clear being upset does not mean harassing the devs, don't do that).
#tbd#bioware critical#listen i am happy to take the L if i am wrong but like i find it very exhausting that you're not even allowed to be a little negative lmao#it's okay that the impact you as a player made on this world matters fuck all when characters who#who felt that impact and would be shaped by the outcome of your decisions are returning lmao#i don't think anyone expects every fucking decision to matter but like people are rightfully bothered some decisions lmao#and these one liners that john epler is so dismissive of do actually matter to people bc they still add flavour to their experience#as players who have been playing these games for decades lmao#it's not hard to see why people aren't the biggest fans of this lmao#you can make a mage divine and no one in northern thedas would care? really?#andrastianism is still the main religion in these places lmaooo#the divine is still the head of that religion in the countries we go to in datv except for tevinter that has the black divine.#like the divine being a mage would probably warrant a fucking note about it at least#the actions of the divine would reflect in how the chantries function like ok cass is the only option closest to the status quo#leliana or vivienne? yeah you'd think decades later they'd have had an impact in how the chantries function?#and you'd at least get to read a note about it lol#like come on#datv spoilers#da4 spoilers#veilguard spoilers#da spoilers
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Is Solas getting paid by the Inquisition for his work
#dragon age#cause he's like actually on the staff list right#like okay dorian and viv and sera are all there representing themselves or a faction right#so they are presumably getting paid by their faction work (sera) or some nebulous independent wealth#Bull is definitely unambiguously getting paid#i don't think spirits have good labor unions so cole is not getting paid#i have no idea what Blackwall is doing but he lives in the barn#so i don't think he cares#Varric's job title is unwelcome tag along#but he has a job so i don't think he's getting paid by the Inquisition either#your advisors plus cass definitely get paid#but solas is like. the only one who i think gets an @inquisition.gov.nz email who may not be getting paid#he must be right#or do you think he refuses it? would josie let him?#oh my god is that pile of gold in trespasser all the money we paid solas that he never fucking spent#actually idk maybe viv and dorian are also being paid because now that i think about it they don't actually have money#they just have the vibes of money#the irony of solas potentially having a higher net worth than viv is very funny#dorian is weird because he's like sort of cut off from his family but not really#did you know if you add enough tags to a post they stop working properly
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I honestly have no clue what ppl are smoking when they post those corny "Cassandra is actually so open to new ideas and concepts" posts in the tags like she is status quo's biggest fan DESPITE talking about how things need to change.
#not character hate btw just a very puzzling thing I keep seeing#even more apparent after I made her divine this playthrough#uhhh thanks for not changing what you said you would change Cass#I promise you it's okay to like characters who aren't progressive ✌️
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pushing my bruce wayne has gray eyes agenda
#ppl confuse gray eyes with rlly light blue bc they are so stark and striking#but they are actually gray and very rare and our closest immediate guess when we see them is light blue#i am pushing my bruce wayne has unsettling gray eyes that jump out at you agenda#he has PEEPERS and everyone does a double take when they look at them...#everyone else has normal blue green brown whatever eyes#dick grayson has nice warm blue eyes#jason has a mix of blue green but they are still pretty dark#ill give tim his weirdo light blue eyes [get him some contacts PLEASE]#and even though damian has canon green eyes i want them to be dark... if i had my way he would have beautiful doe brown eyes#HE DESERVES BEAUTIFUL BROWN EYES OKAY#he and cass can match <33333#steph can have color changing eyes she also deserves that- like hazel eyes that change color with the light#barbara has pretty dark green eyes but like a kaleidoscope#duke has deep deep brown eyes- like almost black.... deep enough to fall in love with... WHO SAID THAT#anyway#bruce wayne
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going down the tim drake ao3 rabbit hole. he's unhinged and i need more
#i can see why i enjoy the fics with baby tim who gets into the batfamily sooner more#his life gets SAD later holy SHIT#he deserves to blow up secret assassin bases. as a treat#let him have a little murder#cmon bruce cmonnnnn#tim would like. rip a hole in the fabric of reality. on *accident*#but he could totally do it on purpose too#and unless you're cass (or another bat i suppose but especially cass) you'd never know if he's lying about it#*also his life is sad earlier too because Bad Parents!!!!!! but i live in fanfic world so it's fine#he got scooped up by the serial adopter it's okay#briony babbles#tim drake#dc#<- hello im new
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Melony feels less like a slow tortury type, but rather: Beat you to a pulp, strangle, gauge eyes out.
She has too much of pent up rage and not enough patience in these matters :p
Real.
I just think of Cass introducing Melony to the idea of torturing and Melony going "Okay, but can I just smash their face with a hammer instead?"
And Cass has a moment of pause before being like "Fuck, you're so hot."
I kinda dig the idea of "One likes the process of torture and the other Just wants to fucking kill you" Because I think everyone would assume Cass is the one who wants to bludgeon people to death. But no. It's a tiny murderer and her sadist girlfriend.
This is literally just "Melony if she finally let the intrusive thoughts win" honestly.
#i think daximus would be the torture couple anyway. they'd have fun with it for sure#elena wouldn't ''kill'' per say but i think she'd direct bela on who ''deserves'' death and bela would kill them gladly#asks#horror lady00#i think cass is fasinated by human anatomy which is why she's okay taking the time to torture#melony is not so. She's much more satisfied bashing in skulls#mecassa#alt aus
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WHY PC DOESN'T WARN ME WHEN I REACH THE LIMIT OF TAGS *THROWS OUT THE TABLE AGAIN*
WHY HE NEEDED THE SMARTER ONE?? FOR BRAIN TASTE??
OSCAR WOULD GLADLY OFFER HIS BODY PARTS HA-HA... ha... OH F*** HE WOULD. How lucky he is to be stupider.
Part 1!
..of an episode that reveals that if something looks like a space horror and sounds like a space horror, maybe it is a space horror.
Who would've guessed?~
Previous
Masterpost
#I like how#After learning that boys have less height#He calls him “big guy” (I kind of feel like Oscar makes him a compliment this way)#Ward: here we go again#Who is smarter? OH I KNEW WHAT WILL BE NEXT WHEEEEZE#.....Well he will do something stupid but he is lucky that stupid ones looks to be less needed....... Ward why are you the smart one...#HWEHEGHREGRHGEHGEHGE The Moon working (OH I JUST REMEMBERED WHAT MOON DOES FOR THE EARTH I'M NOT OKAY AGAIN *cough*)#24/7 dealing with something doing her pirate work#Oscar: Would you like to maybe walk with me for a little?#Ecliptica: *smile* *lifts him up* *proceeds to do her work but walks with Oscar everywhere and talks with him in spare moments*#I so much love the perspective from above#BUT NOT IN THIS SITUATION#WORKSHOP#OF COURSE THE JOB NAMED SCULPTOR SHOULD HAVE THE WORKSHOP#OH. Okay they don't need light. His crew. Lights are mostly for health reasons. I guess they help somehow the fur?#NOT CREEPY AT ALL. I feel like Oscar would say it sincerely without sarcasm *cries*#.........#I see a lot of dangerous things but I'd like not to talk about it.....#What is this stick. Why his holes light up.#DON'T SHUT HIM UP OR I'LL RIP YOUR TAIL OFF YOU F***ER. CUT OPEN OKAY I WILL RIP NOT ONLY YOUR TAIL#THERE'S NOTHING TO OFFER BACKK OFF SHUSHH GO OFF FROM THE SCREEN#DON'T WORRY AHAHAH YOU WILL JUST MISS THE PARTS OF YOUR BODY MAYBE DIE NOTHING SERIOUS AHAHAHAH#....... THE F***s*(soilwlliwLK#CASS OKAY I DID IN FACT LIKE IT BUT IN WHAT COST#OF COURSE WE TOOK THE HORROR TROPE#*THROWS A TABLE OFF*#OH F***#I KNEW I MUST HATE HIM#marble sky#inspiration
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Cass is so fun as a character because she fulfils the 'gruff but with a heart of gold' trope in a way that normally is exclusively used for male characters. Cass can be abrasive, and asocial, and off-putting. She is better than everyone, knows it, and she is not afraid to say it loudly to your face. She tried to help Babs feel better after seeing her cry, and decided the best way was to simply throw Nightwing out of a window (it's okay, he was fine).
But Cass is also someone who loves deeply and cares so much. About everyone. She has strong moral convictions to never kill not because she's scared it would push her over the edge but because she values people's lives so much. Because she believes everyone can choose to be better, and they deserve the chance to make that choice.
She isn't sweet and friendly and someone who always manages to get on with people, but she also isn't a cold ruthless assassin. She is a tough, broken person who finds something to protect in everyone. Someone who can frankly be a jerk (and can be difficult for some people to get along with) but who would risk her life time and time again if it meant helping someone. Cass is a hero through and through.
Anyway, I just love Cass.
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Bruce looks like the kind of parents who will hear the children say that they like some food and automatically accept it as the children's favorite meal
And the children will just eat it forever now to make Bruce happy
What food/snacks/fruit they accidentally say "oh this taste good actually" and now are they cursed by it?
Waitress: And what would you like as your side?
8-year-old Dick: French fries!
[19 years later]
Bruce: And here's your dinner, side of fries as always.
Dick, who's been eating fries every day since: Yippee.
———————
12-year-old Jason: *looks at a candy bar*
Bruce: You want it?
Jason: I dunno, it's like three dollars.
Bruce: Hey, don't worry about it, chum.
[11 years later]
Jason: *finds the same candy bar in his belt*
Jason: Well, it's the thought that counts.
———————
14-year-old Tim: Since Alfred's not home I ordered pizza for dinner.
Bruce, working: *grunts*
[3 years later]
*doorbell rings*
Tim: Weird, I wasn't expecting anyone.
Tim: *opens the door*
Bruce, in a Bat-pizza uniform: Delivery for Tim Drake.
———————
15-year-old Steph: *makes waffles*
[3 years later]
Steph: Bruce, why'd you buy so much flour?
Bruce: So you can make waffles.
———————
Bruce: You hungry?
Duke: I dunno, I guess I could go for a smoothie or something.
[later]
Duke: What's with the second fridge?
Bruce: To keep your smoothies.
———————
Damian: From now on, I am a vegetarian.
Bruce: Okay, but what about protein?
Damian: There are plenty of options, like tofu.
[later]
Damian, faced with a tofu truck: Perhaps I should have listened to Brown's advice.
———————
Bruce: *driving*
Cass: *points to a pumpkin patch*
Bruce: We'll see.
[later]
Cass: *goes to her room*
Cass: Dad?
Bruce: Yes, princess?
Cass: Pumpkin patch. In my room.
Bruce: I called in a favor from Ivy.
#bruce wayne#batman#dick grayson#nightwing#jason todd#red hood#tim drake#red robin#damian wayne#robin#duke thomas#signal#stephanie brown#spoiler#cassandra cain#orphan#batfamily#batfam#batboys#batbros#batgirls#batkids#batsiblings#batman family#incorrect batfamily quotes#incorrect quotes#incorrect dc quotes#dc comics#headcanon#tw food mention
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Which one is in Danger?
Part 2
DCxDP Prompt/Drabbles
Part 1
"We have your son."
Bruce was expecting a very normal day. If you consider having to deal with the chaos of his children and being a vigilante at night as normal.
But nonetheless, a very simple day of his normal routine and once a week dinner with his family.
Only to be broken by a phone call by someone stating that his son has been kidnapped.
Bruce didn't answer right away, he was mentally counting his sons who, are all counted for, are on the dinner table.
"Which one?" Bruce eyed each of his sons and counted them again just to be sure.
"Timothy Drake-Wayne."
Bruce immediately eyed Tim who was sitting in between Jason and Cass.
Tim's here.
Then who's the one being kidnapped?
"Bruce?" Dick spoke up, thinking that something was wrong the way Bruce was looking at all of them.
Bruce slightly waved at Dick, telling him to calm down first. "What do you want?"
Dick's question seemed to catch everyone's attention since they were all looking at Bruce now.
"Two Million. Or he gets it."
A standard threat. The kind he was expecting.
"Can I speak to my son?" This earned confused looks of his children and Bruce waved them off gesturing that it was not what they were thinking about.
"Alright kid," The kidnapper from the other said grunted, almost sounding smug. "Say hello to Daddy."
Bruce could hear heavy breathing, almost sounding like a grunt. It made Bruce slightly worried. "...Tim?" Bruce decided to speak first. "Tim, Are you okay?" And Bruce hopes that he is.
A soft grunt responded. "Hi." A croaked voice managed to respond. It sounded young. And was punched in the stomach. He should know, almost all of his children had experienced that way.
"Don't worry, chum. I'm getting you out of there." Bruce tried reassuring the kid, worried about what they might do to him. Because this isn't Tim. Tim is right across from him and these kidnappers basically had kidnapped the wrong person.
He gestured to his children, a familiar gesture, for them to head to the cave and suit up. They quickly followed, not without worried glances and confused glances at Bruce's way.
"No.." The kid had said, choked out which made Bruce paused on his step in confusion. It caught his children's attention, stopping as well.
"Uhm...Dad? I'll be fine."
Bruce believed that, for some reason, but it didn't stop his worry. But the next words from the boy made him blink
"Please give me your permission."
"....To what?" Bruce asked confusingly. Permission to what?
"To hurt."
Bruce has raised enough children to know enough about silent words in some part of the sentences without right out saying it.
To hurt them.
The kid is asking permission to hurt his kidnappers.
Bruce should say no and wait for help. Should be saying that help is on the way.
Bruce should say that he'll come and save him.
Now, Bruce doesn't normally follow his gut. It causes too much mystery and had no explanation to either it would be a good thing or a bad thing.
But right now, for once, Bruce would agree with his gut.
"....Alright."
Static came in the phone, like it was losing signal but he could clearly hear the boy voice coming out like an echo.
"Good."
"What the-- AAAHHH!!!"
Beeeepppp
Bruce blinked as he looked down at his phone after the call ended.
.....Should he have not give him permission?
"B? What's wrong? Did something happen?" Dick asked, increasingly worried now as he saw Bruce staring at his phone.
"....Suit up." Bruce concluded. They should find the boy as quickly as possible. "And call an ambulance."
Bruce could see the confused look at everyone's faces as he walked passed them.
"Wait, B!" Duke had spoke up running after Bruce with his siblings. "Was someone hurt? Is it another gang fight?"
"No. The ambulance is for the kidnappers."
".....What??"
: )
Parts: Part 1
#dc x dp#dc x dp prompt#dc x dp recs#dcxdp#dp x dc crossover#dpxdc#fic recs#fic finder#dpxdc fic recs#eldritch#eldritch danny
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Bruce still does the tooth fairy thing for the kids.
The bats are constantly losing and having to replace their teeth. Because you don't get hit, kicked, and thrown on your face almost every other night and keep all your teeth.
So imagine early on when Duke first stays at the manor. He comes in saying how he was thrown into a car and lost a tooth on patrol.
They tell him to put it under his pillow for the tooth fairy. He laughs it off like , "OkaY, the tOotH fAirY."
The next morning at breakfast
Dick: "How much did you get?"
Duke: "Get what?"
Dick: "From the tooth fairy?"
Duke: "Oh, haha, right."
Steph: "?...Wait...Bruce?!"
Jason: "Why didn't he get anything??"
Bruce: "Don't ask me. The tooth fairy probably couldn't find it."
Duke: "You're not joking? You were serious about leaving my tooth?"
Tim: "Yeah, B always leaves money."
Bruce: "Untrue. The tooth fairy leaves money to children who lose a tooth. Not me."
Jason: "Yeah, whatever, anyway, make sure you let him or Alfred know when you lose a tooth and leave it out when you go to bed.
Bruce: "Alfred and I have no say in the tooth fairy's actions."
Tim: "We've caught him on camera, but he insists to deny."
Bruce: "Or perhaps you caught a clever disguse made to trick you?"
Dick: "... Just leave it out tonight, Duke."
Duke: "Okay, I guess I'll leave it out then?"
Bruce: "Somewhere the tooth fairy can find it easily, Is what I assume they would want."
Steph: "Smooth."
Damian *walking in*: "Father, thank you for the extra cash. This will go to the new treats I wanted to try for Batcow."
Bruce: "It wasn't me, thank the tooth fairy."
Damian: "... Yes, the tooth fairy. Thank you tooth fairy."
Bruce: "I think the tooth fairy appreciates that, Damian."
Everyone: *sigh*
(Cass is there the whole time casually eating because only Bruce knows that she sometimes will sneak in the rooms first to wait for him.)
Cass when Bruce finds her in the darkness of her sibling's rooms: "😃"
#he refuses to admit its him#caught red handed and just deflects#eveyone just accepts it and goes along with it.#bruce wayne#dick grayson#jason todd#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#tim drake#duke thomas#damain wayne#batfam#batfam incorrect quotes#bat family#batfam crack#dc#batman headcanon#batman#gotham#dc comics
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He could overlook a lot of things, but this was getting ridiculous. You’d think seasoned vigilantes would have better excuses prepared, but Danny had caught that flash of panic that crossed Tim’s face as Danny came face to face with Tim dragging an unconscious Steph to her designated room in the manor.
“Uh.”
“Danny! Uh, Stephanie brained herself- uh, sliding down the bannisters and- pleasedon’ttellBruce.”
Danny blinks, staring at Tim and then very pointedly, very slowly, turned his head back towards the direction he came from: the main hall… where the bannisters were. He wonders what vigilante hijinks they were trying to hide from B this time.
Tim coughs, trying to inch Stephanie away. “Uh. She was doing… cartwheels?”
Danny let his eyes slowly take in the bruises that were clearly not from “cartwheeling in the mansion” on the both of them. There’s a huge bandaged cut on Steph’s forearm and a giant bruise on the edge of Tim’s jaw. Tim’s face twitches nervously, not that anyone else would have noticed- except Danny has enhanced ghost senses and could feel the panic coming off of his adopted brother.
“You know…” Shit, what does he do? Not knowing would be so much easier if these idiots gave him good excuses! “I don’t think I want to know what you two have been up to… but should I be worried for your, uh, physical health?”
“Nope!”
“… Okay.” He says. Tim opens his mouth to make further excuses but Danny adds quickly, “But don’t tell me, because if Bruce asks, I want plausible deniability.”
Cartwheels, Danny’s ghostly ass. Luckily, this show of doubt reaffirms Tim’s belief that Danny believes them all of the other times. Danny grins inwardly, planning capitalizing on the guilt that flashed over Tim’s face.
“Deal.”
“Want help?” The halfa points at Steph, who’s still being dragged over the carpet by a noodle armed Tim. Danny knows Tim’s strong, he’s a vigilante, but it’s funny watching him pretend to struggle.
“Please. I’m so tired right now.” He looks it too. Danny’s brows furrow with genuine concern when he takes in Tim’s drowned raccoon look. He picks up Steph, firmly removing her from Tim’s suddenly weak grip. Being careful to avoid her injuries, Danny nods at the door to her room. Tim cracks it open and does a little showy gesture towards the inside.
“C’mon, we’ll tuck her in and then I’ll tuck you in.”
“What, you don’t have to do that.”
“If you don’t let me tuck you in and make sure you sleep, I’ll tell Alfred who really accidentally poured boiling hot coffee on his azaleas last week. And I’ll sic Dick on you and tell him you haven’t been sleeping enough.”
“You drive a hard bargain,” Tim grumbles. “But fine. It’s really not my fault I’m this tired. A missing spleen is hard to handle, you know.”
“Yeah, missing an organ sucks,” Danny says, shit eating grin hidden long enough to catch the contemplative bloodhound look that passes over Tim’s face.
“Which- uh, which one of your organs is missing?”
“Liver.” Danny says, remembering the flashes of pain. He tilts his head away to hide the grin at Tim’s panicked face.
When he tucks Tim in, he pretends to believe Tim’s sleeping act and left his room while mumbling about the Wayne’s clumsiness and bruises and stocking up on bruise cream. He couldn’t even enjoy Tim’s floundering, this time, worried as he is.
——
“Brother.” Danny half turns his head, just to beam a sunny smile at Cass. He signs an exuberant hello. The halfa hangs up his coat as he addresses his adopted sister.
“Cass! What’s up?”
“Dinner.” She smiles back, signing that Alfred wanted them to the dinning room post haste. The main dining room, because rich people were fruit loops and Batman is totally included. Cassandra looks down and gasps.
What…?
Oh. Fuck. Danny glances down. He genuinely forgot about that.
“Huh.”
“Okay?” Suddenly, Cass is right next to him, hand reached out and hovering over the actual knife Danny forgot was sticking out of him. At least it’s where his liver should be, so he won’t have to pretend.
“Oh. Yeah, I’m good. Don’t have a liver.” Danny decides on the spot that he’s not gonna mess with Cass. She smiled the same as him. “Got mugged on the way back but I think they said I could keep the knife, right?”
“Danny.” She’s frowning at him. He feels like he just kicked tiny Cujo. But he doesn’t feel bad enough to blurt everything out.
“Here. You can have it if you want?” Danny casually pulls out the knife and holds the wound together with his bare hands. Cass looks more alarmed. She bodily picks up Danny and starts running.
“Woah!”
Cass throws him at Alfred, gently.
“Miss Cassandra! Why, I never-!” Alfred pauses in surprise.
“Uh. Wow, Cass. You’re really strong.” Danny pipes up, hand still over his gushing wound.
She ignores him, pointing at Danny and telling Alfred, “Hurt. Got mugged. Dumb.”
“Hey! It’s not my fault Gothamites are ready to jump people at any moment. Besides, it’s daytime. It’s not like the vigilante furries are out to save my butt. I think I did really well coming back safe, you know?”
“Hurt. Forgot the knife. Was in him.”
“Master Danny!”
Danny pouts. He also knows there’s a discreet camera in the corners of the sitting room, so he’s definitely hoping he could phase into the cave when Barbara eventually tells the group that he called them “vigilante furries.”
Alfred clucks his tongue and set to work patching him up. Danny tries not to bask in the careful way Alfred tended to his wounds. It reminds him too much of Jazz, if Jazz was British and a man with greying hair.
But because they were watching him and he was watching them in return, Danny noticed the moment Alfred’s hands stalled and Cass’ gaze got intense. What now…?
Oh, fuck, his vivisection scar. Oops. Danny smiled, channeling Dani (his lovely clone sister) at her most innocent.
Cass smiled back, just as sunnily, fists tightening at her side in repressed fury.
——
“Cass? Why’d you call us?”
“Yeah, baby bat. I got a couple o’ smugglers to talk to.”
Cass paces.
“What is it, Cassandra?” Damian tuts impatiently.
“Danny. Has… scars. Autopsy. But was struggling. When cut.”
“What.”
“A vivisection, Master Jason.” Alfred’s voice was crisp and eerily cold. His hands are folded, rage only held back by his sheer will and a well practiced sense of propriety.
“We find. Who hurt him,” Cass snarls. “We. End.”
Jason’s eyes glint green, hands going to his guns. “Fine. By. Me.”
“It does tie in with the dead comment. I wonder what happened to him.” Tim clacks away at the bat computer, furiously looking into the matter already. Bruce has taken to prowling, stressed out at the prospect of one more of his children- not a vigilante at that- getting hurt the way Jason had. Worse, even. A vivisection. He was alive, dissected. Aware enough to struggle. Dick looked like he was torn about hunting down and lunging at whoever hurt Danny to rip their throats out with his bare teeth versus the urge to go back up to the manor and wrap Danny in bubble wrap.
In the corner, Danny was having a quiet breakdown because he came here to watch them react to vigilante furries, not offering to murder the people who vivisected him. What the fuck?? He ran his hands through his hair, invisible.
——
“Oh, by the way, we should consider more daytime shifts.”
“Why?” Spoiler asks Barbara.
“Danny got mugged. And called us the nightly furries.���
“The fuckin’ what-?” Jason chokes out, laughing. Bruce stops his pacing, body language becoming slightly offended.
Danny muffles a laugh only Alfred would have heard.
#danny phantom#Danny ‘plausible deniability’ Phantom#Jason Todd#red hood#batman#tim drake#dick grayson#cassandra cain#black bat#Tim usually would be a better liar#but usually he lies to Batman#not Danny#Cassandra Cain and these idiots that she unfortunately loves#Danny: you stabbed me so I’m keeping the knife#Danny plays finders keepers with Gotham muggers#he wins#cartwheeling in Wayne manor#dc x dp#dp x dc#bamf danny phantom
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Okay but hear me out- the batkids as actual Vampires. Not bruce, just the kids, and bruce providing for them. Because he just has the tastiest blood.
Little Dick toddling over to Bruce, tears in his eyes because he ate his bloody dinner too fast and hes still hungry and Bruce just sighing and sticking out his hand and Dick lights up and they watch a movie while dick is happily gnawing on Bruce’s thumb and sucking his blood. Big Dick complains very loudly about how hungry he is and Bruce will glower at him before finally giving in and throwing an arm around his eldests shoulders and Dick pecks his cheek with a sweet “thank you dad.” before sinking his teeth into Bruce’s arm.
Little Jason would very politely come over and tug on his hand and Bruce would pick him up and let him bite his hand and drink, but Big Jason just pounces on Bruce from behind and sinks his teeth into Bruces shoulder/neck for blood.
Little Tim slipping five dollar bills into Bruce’s hand just before chomping his thigh and Big Tim very casually stabbing a needle into Bruce’s leg, extracting blood and then putting it into his coffee and walking away. Sometimes, if he’s feeling nostalgic, he will curl up with his head on bruce’s lap and actually bite him for blood, for pure blood, but he likes his coffee bruce blood blend better
Little Cass never once asked bruce for blood because she was scared, but Bruce would just scoop her into his arms and offer her his already cut open shoulder until she was comfortable enough scaling him like a tree and drinking from his shoulder. Big Cass still doesn't ask for blood, she just lands on his shoulders and bites his bicep.
Little Steph was a little vampire gremlin and any time she saw Bruce without clothes (since his children feed off of him Bruce wears very little, just a tank top and shorts and makes sure to shave as much as possible to provide ample biting space, but as Batman he still wears his full suit just easy to slip off certain parts so his kids can feed easily) she would suction onto him like a little affectionate leech and dig her little teeth into his back. Big Steph also likes his back and has much the same habits as little steph did.
Little Babs wasn't too keen on blood, but sometimes Bruce would offer her his forearm while she was working and she would work and eat. Big Babs has no qualms about taking his blood, but has few chances, so he stops by her Oracle hideout sometimes and just holds out his arm for her to drink
Little Damian thought drinking blood from a human was beneath him. Until he saw Cass doing it and wanted to follow her footsteps, but he cant climb bruce as well as her, so he just sank his teeth into Bruce’s calf. Big Damian will wait until Bruce sits or lays down and props his feet up and will then enjoy his calf blood.
Bruce Wayne who is covered, littered in bite scars of varying sizes, who was once knocked over by his three eldest sons because they had been on a mission away from him for a week and were hungry and before they even said hello just sank their teeth into his neck, hand and thigh. Bruce Wayne who’s majority of scars come from his children, not villains and who willingly offers up his neck to any one of his children if they seem hungry.
Bruce Wayne who, as Batman, will peel his protective bat suit arm off because Dick was hungry on a stake out.
Bruce Wayne who is not a vampire but his children all are and he’ll be damned if he deprives them their nutrients.
(selina kyle who is also a vampire and also gets her blood from bruce but from his-)
#idk what this is truly#i just had the mental image of jason#plowing into bruce from behind and /sinking/ his teeth into bruces neck#and clark watching in surprise and horror#but bruce doesnt even flinch just goes 'hey jaybird. rough day?'#and jason mutters a yes around a mouthful of blood#and then the rest of the kids also join in#just just#just good dad bruce wayne okay?#good dad bruce wayne#vampire batkids#batfam#batman#batman and robin
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Whenever Jason is not in the best of moods, the rest of the family knew just who to get to make this right; you.
So the moment dick pushed you into Jason’s room, closing the door behind you, knowing firsthand that Jason hates being bothered when he wasn’t in a great mood, much to you’re surprise but the moment Jason saw that it was you his mood lightens and his face becomes soft.
‘Hi. I heard you weren’t in a good mood.’ You said and within the blink of an eye you were within Jason’s arms as he cuddled you against him like a teddy bear.
He hummed deeply as he burrowed his head into your shoulder. It was cute to see Jason like this, one minute about to bite someone’s head, but the next he’s docile and acting like some overgrown cat. Purring and clinging onto you for emotional support as you rubbed his broad back soothingly.
You were the Jason whisperer amongst his family, only you could bring calm and quiet to his mind just by caressing his cheek and smiling at him while asking; ‘are you okay jay birdie?’
‘No.’ He huffs. ‘Family being a bunch of dicks.’
‘Isn’t that how family usually are? A bunch of dicks?’ You replied and Jason couldn’t help but smile as he brought you closer as he draped the covers of his bed over the both of you, getting ready for an impromptu nap.
‘This family is the biggest bunch of dicks to ever dick.’ Jason groaned sleepily as he tucked you under his chin, practically cocooning his body over yours in a protective manner.
‘Why?’ You asked, running your hand through his hair, making sure to mess with his white tuff at the front the most. ‘They know my weakness for you.’ He answers as he feel the need to sleep lull him along with your fingers through his hair easing him into a state of relaxation.
Even after Japan falls asleep and dick, Damian, Tim, Steph, cass and duke peaked their heads through the doorway to see you stroking the back of their behemoth of a brother as though he was as harmless as a puppy.
‘Jason whisperer strikes again.’ Steph said in a whisper.
You smiled at them before looking back at Jason, then back at them. ‘I’m going to be stuck here for a good while.’ You tell them and their faces changed. ‘Why?’ Duke asked, worried that something was wrong.
‘Watch.’ You tell them as you began to shuffle away from Jason, only for Jason to shove you back under his chin and his legs to latch onto yours, keeping your face pressed against his tiddies. ‘See, he won’t let me leave.’ You added, voice muffled from Joe close Jason was pressing you to his chest. Dick, Tim, Damian, cass, duke and Steph could only smile and find humour in your current situation and how sweet their brother was when it came to you.
‘All the more reason for you to move in.’ Damian said point blankly and you look at him oddly. Dick puts his hand on Damian’s shoulder, smiling reassuringly at you. ‘Damian only wishes you to be closer, for Jason’s sake and ours.’ You smiled at the pair of them from your position on Jason’s chest. ‘That’s sweet and all but i think it would be best if you guys left us alone for a couple hours, I can feel Jason shifting.’
With that being said dick, Tim, Damian, cass, Steph and duke were quick to shut the door and scatter across the manor, not knowing that they had fell for your trick so you could fall asleep with Jason without any interruptions. ‘You minx.’ He grumbles into your head as you kiss under his jaw.
‘Not my fault I want to spend time with my beautiful man.’ You replied as you got yourself comfortable and fell into a seamless sleep.
#dc imagine#dc x reader#dc x you#dc fanfic#dc comics x reader#dc fic#dc x y/n#dc fanfiction#jason todd x reader#jason todd imagine#jason todd fluff#jason todd imagines#jason todd x y/n#jason todd x you#red hood x you#red hood imagine#red hood x reader#red hood imagines
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