#who felt that impact and would be shaped by the outcome of your decisions are returning lmao

[ayrennaranaaldmeri]

the fact is, if varric lives (and that's an if bc maybe solas does kill him lmao idk how much to trust that minimap reveal) it IS weird that you can't customise a hawke or account for the decision because it would be a little weird if a man who has lived through a wannabe god + blight dragon attacking warden fortress has nothing to say about ghilan'nain and her blight dragon attacking a warden fortress, especially if he potentially lost his best friend (Hawke). It's not outlandish for people to be a little disappointed to not get some customisation there because the choices are not equal to varric. the loss of hawke is obviously a bigger impact on him than whichever warden is there. given varric's personality, it's not outlandish to expect him to talk about it with Rook either especially considering weisshaupt is a thing that happens in the game. if he dies beforehand it doesn't matter, but if he's going to be around? yeah you'd think he'd be talking about it here.

speaking of weisshaupt, A PLACE YOU GET TO GO, a hero of ferelden who made the ultimate sacrifice IS FUCKING INTERRED THERE. But it's just "whining" to expect a nod (esp one that you can customise so it's your hero of ferelden) i guess.

regardless of whether morrigan has mythal or not, who she is as a person does change based on whether she was romanced and whether she had a child. it is natural that this matters and people aren't stupid to be tentatively concerned that nothing of her history is "required" but she's apparently this important vip character who will have more involvement in the game than you expect. like you are allowed to ask: okay what does this mean, what will she be like, will she be the same character i've loved across multiple games?

people are allowed to be upset or concerned that a game series that historically took your choices and your decisions into account has watered that down to 3 choices when certain choices that WOULD impact characters that appear in THIS game aren't. (and to be clear being upset does not mean harassing the devs, don't do that).

[supersummer01]

Are your sissy desires compatible with your male desires?

Decide if your sissy and masculine desires are compatible.

Some desires will be compatible and some will be antagonist. These are the pros and the cons of becoming a sissy. You'll know when you have compatible desires when they can be tied together with the word \"and, \" desires that are antagonistic are tied together with the word \"but.\" This is really easy to figure out. For example Your sissy side wants to get on hormones that shrink your dick but your masculine side still wants to fuck chicks. Antagonistic since you have a conflict tied by the word \"but.\" On the other hand if you say; \"I need to shape my butt to be a sexy sissy, and being fit makes me a happier guy.\" Then you have a compatible desire between your sissy and masculine desires.

More serious conflicting desires are:

I want to have sex with men but I don't want to cheat on my wife.

I want a master but I hate being submissive.

I want to show off my sissy side but I'm afraid of what would happen to my career/family if anyone ever found out.

If in the end you can weigh up all your desires and decide that the negatives are outweighed by the positives then you should consider the sissy lifestyle and start taking steps towards it. If for you the cons outweigh the pros then you need to take a step back, not think with your dick, and take a good hard look at what you would lose if you became a sissy and think long and hard about if you would really be happy if you made those sacrifices.

Would becoming a sissy help you or hurt you?

Becoming a sissy is to make a huge lifestyle change and one that's impossible to hide. You can hide being gay, you can hide being a racist, but you can't hide haircuts, fingernail polish, and makeup. In many cases the lifestyle change doesn't really tip the scales in either direction, however in some it can mean the total loss and alienation of the person trying to become a sissy. Once someone goes down the path of having a broken support network, they often go down a dark road in life. On the other hand though, some men become sissies and become much happier in life. You need to decide if the outcome of your decision to become a sissy will help or hurt you in life.

For example. You might become a sissy and meet new friends, have great sex and improve your self esteem. But at the same time your family would disown you, your partner leave you, and your boss would fire you. You absolutely must consider the implications of coming out of the sissy closet before you ever start working to become a sissy.

I'm disgusted with myself for cumming to my sissy fantasies.

If you feel a revulsion towards yourself after you cum then you are experiencing a strong warning sign that becoming a sissy is not necessarily a wise choice for you. It's your brain throwing up a big warning sign that what you are doing is going to have a strong psychological impact.

Many men love to jerk off to the taboo and extreme, even if they have no intention of actually doing the things they fantasize or watch. In many of the cases of guys who think they are into becoming a sissy, they are often forgetting this fact. Most sissies felt \"right\" when they found sissy porn or the sissy lifestyle. They either weren't bothered by their interest or didn't care. Many men that engage in cross-dressing are doing so despite having no interest or reason to become a sissy. If you fall into either the camp of fetishists or being disgusted with yourself after cumming to sissy fantasies, then you probably shouldn't take on the commitment of being a sissy.

Conclusion.

In the end becoming a sissy can be one of the greatest things in life for some people. But I've also heard horror stories of transgender women who thought that they wanted to be something that they were not only to discover that everything they already had is gone, and what they wanted wasn't so great. It may seem exciting to become a sissy, but you really need to ask yourself why you want to become one and if it's right for you.

If in the end you decide that becoming a sissy is a good fit for you there are plenty of great guides and people that will help you achieve your highest good as a sissy. The communities are full of great people. If you do decide to be a sissy I wish you luck and welcome you into the sisterhood.

[prosegalaxy]

"Crossroads of Time: Shaping Realities and Choices"

In "Crossroads of Time," Alex, a historian, stumbles upon a hidden gateway leading to an alternate universe while studying different timelines. The protagonist is greeted by their alternate self, who has taken a different path in life. As they explore the new world, Alex realizes the impact of their decisions and actions in both universes. Conflicts arise between the two Alexs as they navigate through their divergent lives. The climax finds them at a crossroads, where a crucial decision must be made with consequences that echo across worlds. Ultimately, a twist reveals a powerful being testing choices and decisions, forcing Alex to return to their original world forever changed. In the dimly lit room, Alex stood before an ancient map, their fingers tracing the worn parchment. The air was thick with anticipation, and the scent of dust and ink filled their nostrils. Their heart raced in excitement as they prepared for the journey ahead. "Do you know what this means?" Alex's alternate self, Aria, asked from across the room. She had a sharp jawline and piercing green eyes that seemed to see right through Alex. "It's a gateway to an unknown universe," Alex whispered, their voice echoing in the chamber. "If we can find it, we could learn more about alternate histories and parallel worlds." Aria crossed her arms, studying the map. "But what if our actions have consequences? What if changing one reality affects another?" Alex met Aria's gaze, a challenge flickering in their eyes. "We can't let fear hold us back. We must explore and learn." As they ventured into the unknown world, the two Alexs found themselves in different timelines, each facing unique challenges. They struggled to understand the consequences of their actions as they navigated through their divergent lives, constantly aware that their choices could ripple across realities. Finally, they found themselves at a crossroads, where a powerful being revealed itself. "You have made your choice," it said, its voice echoing like thunder. "Now you must face the consequences." And with that, Alex was pulled back to their original world, forever changed by their experiences. They returned with newfound wisdom, using it to create a more balanced life and understanding the importance of their actions in both worlds. In the dimly lit library, Alex sat poring over ancient scrolls, completely engrossed in their research on alternate history and parallel universes. The scent of old parchment and ink filled the air, providing a sense of tranquility amidst the chaos of time. As Alex turned a page, a faint, shimmering light caught their eye. To their surprise, it revealed a hidden gateway, beckoning them into the unknown. With trepidation and excitement, they stepped through and found themselves in an entirely different world. In this new realm, Alex met their alternate self, Aria, who was also studying the intricacies of time and space. The two shared an instant connection, but as they explored their divergent lives, conflicts arose between them. Their actions had consequences that echoed across both realities, and they struggled to reconcile their choices with the greater good. While wandering through a mystical forest, they encountered a powerful being who tested their decision-making abilities. Alex's heart raced as they were shown the potential outcomes of each choice, forcing them to confront the weight of their actions. With newfound wisdom and understanding, Alex made a crucial decision that would forever change both worlds. As they returned to their original world, Alex felt a sense of balance and clarity in their life. The lessons learned from Aria and the alternate universe had transformed them, leaving an indelible mark on their soul. With newfound insight, they continued their research on history, knowing that every decision mattered, and every choice held the potential to change the course of time itself. The two begin to explore their divergent lives, as Alex witnesses Aria's achievements and relationships. They learn that their actions in one universe can have profound consequences in the other. As they navigate through life, tensions arise between them due to differing perspectives and experiences. One day, a powerful being appears before them, challenging their understanding of choices and decisions. ```Dialogue: Alex (Aria): "Why are our lives so different, even though we're from the same world?" Powerful Being: "Your choices shape your realities. Your actions in one world echo into the other." Aria: "But how can I change my life and help those I care about?" Powerful Being: "You must learn to make difficult decisions, knowing that they'll have lasting impacts across worlds." ``` In the end, Alex is forced to return to their original world, forever changed by the experience. They apply their newfound wisdom to create a more balanced life and continue their research into alternate histories, now with a deeper understanding of the interconnectedness of time and space. In the bustling streets of the city, Alex and Aria stood side by side, taking in the sights and sounds that surrounded them. "Wow, this is so different from our world," Alex remarked. "I never thought we could have such different experiences in parallel universes." "You're right," Aria replied. "It's fascinating to see how even small choices can lead to entirely different lives and perspectives." They walked further into the city, passing a street performer who caught their attention with his mesmerizing act. "Hey, look!" Alex exclaimed, pointing at the stage. "Let's go see what he's doing!" The two approached the performer, captivated by his skillful manipulation of the flames dancing in the air. "What do you think he does in our world?" Aria wondered aloud. "I don't know," Alex pondered, "But I hope we get to find out someday." As they watched the performance, a sudden gust of wind blew through the streets, causing the flames to flicker and dance even more intensely. The two historians couldn't help but feel a connection between the fiery display and their own lives, as if the universe was telling them something important about the power of choice and the interconnectedness of all things. As they continued exploring this new world, Alex and Aria vowed to continue learning from each other, using their unique experiences to gain a deeper understanding of the mysteries of alternate histories and parallel universes. Alex stared at the ancient parchment, the line they were studying glowing with an eerie light. "What does it mean?" Aria asked, her eyes wide with curiosity. "I'm not sure," Alex replied, running their fingers over the intricate symbols. "It seems to be about choices and their consequences." The parchment began to pulse, and a voice echoed through the room. "Choose wisely, for every decision shapes your destiny." Alex and Aria looked at each other, understanding dawning on their faces. "We have to make a choice," Alex said, their voice filled with determination. "But what if we make the wrong one?" Aria whispered, her hands trembling. Alex smiled reassuringly. "There's no such thing as a wrong choice, only lessons to learn." They glanced back at the parchment, feeling the weight of their decision. In that moment, Alex and Aria realized they had the power to change not just their own lives, but the lives of countless others in both realities. The consequences of their choices echoed through time, creating ripples that touched every corner of existence. With newfound understanding and wisdom, they continued to explore alternate histories, knowing that each decision held the potential to shape a better future. Alex, a historian with a fascination for alternate history and parallel universes, was just starting their day when they stumbled upon an ancient manuscript in the archives. The text described a hidden gateway leading to another universe where time and space intertwined in ways Alex had only imagined. Intrigued, they embarked on a journey to explore this mysterious realm. Upon arriving, they found themselves face-to-face with their alternate self, Aria, who lived a completely different life from Alex. Aria was a renowned artist, traveling the world and creating masterpieces inspired by their experiences in this uncharted universe. As they spent more time together, tensions began to rise due to the stark contrasts in their lives and perspectives. In an attempt to understand the implications of their actions in both realities, Alex and Aria came across a powerful being who tested their choices and decisions. The encounter was enlightening, forcing Alex to return forever changed to their original world. They now applied this newfound wisdom to create a more balanced life while continuing their research into alternate histories. In the bustling city where they resided, they encountered a street performer whose captivating act led them to reflect on the power of choice and its effects on their lives and parallel universes. The performer, noticing Alex's interest, began a conversation with them about the significance of choices in shaping one's destiny. As the sun set, the two exchanged stories and ideas, deepening their understanding of the interconnectedness of time and space. In the bustling city, Alex stood in awe before the captivating performance of a street magician. The performer's act seemed to defy the laws of physics as objects levitated and vanished with a mere wave of his hands. The crowd was entranced, but Alex couldn't shake the feeling that they were witnessing something more than just magic. As the performance ended, Alex approached the magician, who introduced himself as Aiden. Curious about the origin of his powers, Alex asked if he too could experience them. Aiden smiled enigmatically and offered a choice: either they could switch places and let Alex try the magic, or Alex could watch as Aiden used his abilities to explore Alex's world. Intrigued by the potential implications on their research into alternate histories and parallel universes, Alex chose the latter option. In an instant, Aiden was gone, replaced by a disoriented Alex who found himself in his own body, witnessing his own life from the outside. It was a strange and unsettling experience, like observing a parallel universe where he had made different choices and lived through divergent experiences. As he watched, he saw himself make decisions that led to dire consequences, both for himself and those around him. He also saw moments of joy and triumph, but the weight of the potential ramifications weighed heavily on his heart. As Alex's life unfolded before him, he heard a voice in his head: "Remember, your actions have consequences in both realities." The words rang true, and as he returned to his own body, he knew that he had gained a deeper understanding of the interconnectedness of time and space. With this newfound wisdom, Alex resolved to apply it to his life, creating a more balanced existence while continuing to study the mysteries of alternate histories and parallel universes. And in the heart of the city, the captivating performer continued to enthrall audiences with the power of choice and its effects on their lives and parallel worlds. As the performer's music filled the air, Alex approached them, asking, "Do your choices in one reality affect others too?" The performer smiled knowingly, "Indeed, every decision we make ripples through time and space, creating new realities." ``` As Alex stared at the intricate design of the clock's inner workings, they couldn't help but feel a sense of awe. The gears spun effortlessly, each one playing its part in keeping time. "You know," the historian whispered, "it's incredible how something so small can have such a significant impact on our lives." Alex turned to see their alternate self, Aria, who had been quietly observing them. They shared a knowing smile, understanding the weight of the clock's purpose and its implications for both their realities. "Time is a curious thing, isn't it?" Aria mused, their voice echoing with a sense of wonder. "We can change the course of history in one universe and feel the ripples in another." Alex nodded, their eyes locked on the clock's pendulum as it swung back and forth. "It's like we're standing at the crossroads of time," Aria continued, "with decisions that could lead us down a myriad of paths." "Yes," Alex agreed, their voice soft but resolute. "Our actions have consequences in both worlds. But sometimes, it feels as if we're walking on eggshells, afraid that our tiniest choices will shatter the delicate balance between realities." Aria nodded, understanding the burden they shared. "But maybe," Alex suggested, "we can use this knowledge to make better choices, not only in our own lives but also in our research into alternate histories and parallel universes." Aria smiled, a spark of determination in their eyes. "We'll do that," they promised, clenching their fist as if swearing an oath. Alex felt a surge of hope, knowing that together, they could make a difference. And with the clock still ticking away behind them, they set off to face whatever challenges awaited them, ready to learn from both their successes and failures in the complex dance of time. Alex and Aria found themselves at the entrance of the hidden gateway, both nervous and excited about the adventure that lay ahead. As they stepped through, they were greeted by a mysterious figure who introduced himself as The Watcher. "You have been chosen to explore the depths of time and space," he said, his voice echoing through the vast void before them. "But beware," he continued, "The choices you make here will have consequences in both realities." Alex and Aria exchanged glances, unsure of what lay ahead but determined to find out. As they navigated through their divergent lives, tensions mounted between the two as their perspectives and experiences differed greatly. In one reality, Alex was a celebrated scientist while Aria was an artist, struggling to make ends meet. Their interactions were tense, filled with accusations and resentment. In another reality, Aria was a renowned physicist, while Alex fought to find his place in the world. The roles were reversed, and their arguments were just as heated. Finally, they encountered a powerful being who tested their choices and decisions, forcing Alex to face the consequences of their actions in both realities. As he returned to his original world forever changed, he vowed to apply this newfound wisdom to create a more balanced life. They continued their research into alternate histories and parallel universes, gaining a deeper understanding of the interconnectedness of time and space. In the bustling city, they encountered a street performer whose captivating act led them to reflect on the power of choice and its effects on their lives and parallel universes. With newfound wisdom, Alex resolved to apply it to their life, creating a more balanced existence while continuing to study the mysteries of alternate histories and parallel universes. Alex and Aria stared in awe at the street performer, mesmerized by her captivating act. The line that resonated with them was, "The choices we make shape our destinies." Alex turned to Aria, their eyes meeting with a mix of wonder and determination. "Do you think...could this be true?" they asked, their voice barely audible above the bustling city sounds. Aria nodded, her expression serious. "It's something we've been exploring in our studies," she replied. "Every decision we make creates ripples that can change the course of our lives and those around us." Alex leaned against a nearby wall, deep in thought. They remembered the powerful being who had tested their choices and decisions, forcing them to confront the consequences of their actions. The experience had changed them forever, instilling a newfound sense of responsibility. Aria placed a hand on Alex's shoulder, her gaze meeting his. "You can use this wisdom, Alex," she said softly. "To create a more balanced life." Alex nodded, a slow smile spreading across their face. "We'll continue to study the mysteries of alternate histories and parallel universes," they promised. "But I'll also strive for balance in my own world. It's time to embrace the power of choice and its effects on our lives." As the street performer finished her act, Alex and Aria knew they were on the brink of a new journey – one filled with both wonder and responsibility. They were ready to face whatever challenges lay ahead, armed with the knowledge that their choices would shape not only their destinies but those of countless others in the tapestry of time and space. Alex and Aria stood at the edge of the hidden gateway, their eyes wide with wonder and anticipation. The air was thick with the scent of adventure and mystery, as they prepared to step into the unknown universe before them. As they crossed over, they found themselves in vastly different lives, each with their own unique experiences and perspectives. In one reality, Alex was a renowned historian, while Aria was a struggling artist. In another, Alex was a successful business owner, while Aria was a dedicated scientist. The contrasting lives caused tensions between them, as they struggled to understand and accept each other's choices and decisions. One day, they encountered a powerful being who tested their resolve, challenging them to question the importance of their choices and decisions. This encounter forced Alex to return forever changed to their original world, but with newfound wisdom from the street performer's act that they had witnessed together. "You see," the street performer had said, "every choice we make creates a ripple effect, altering our lives and those of countless others." With this wisdom in mind, Alex resolved to apply it to their life, creating a more balanced existence while continuing to study the mysteries of alternate histories and parallel universes. Together, they embraced the power of choice and its effects on their lives and countless others in the tapestry of time and space, ready to face whatever challenges lay ahead. The sun dipped below the horizon, casting an orange glow over the cobblestone streets of the small town. Alex and Aria stood side by side, their breaths visible in the crisp autumn air. They had been friends for as long as they could remember, but today felt different. As if something momentous was about to happen. "Do you ever feel like we're living in a parallel universe?" Alex asked, breaking the silence. "Like everything we know is just one version of reality?" Aria nodded thoughtfully. "I've always wondered about that. It makes me think about all the choices we've made and how they could have led to completely different lives." "It's fascinating, isn't it? To imagine what our lives would be like if we had made a different choice at a crossroads," Alex replied, his eyes glistening with curiosity. Aria smiled. "Sometimes I wish I could see the other versions of ourselves. To know how our choices have shaped us." Alex considered her words and then, in a sudden burst of inspiration, he pulled out an old map from his pocket. "What if we could find a gateway to another world? One where all those possibilities exist at once?" Aria's eyes widened in amazement. "Is that possible?" Together, they set off on an adventure that would change their lives forever, discovering the power of choice and the intricate tapestry of time and space. Alex and Aria stood at the crossroads of time, their fingers tracing invisible lines in the air as they pondered the complexities of alternate histories and parallel universes. "What if we had made different choices?" Aria mused, her eyes alight with curiosity. "Would our lives have turned out differently?" "It's like a dance," Alex replied, their voice filled with wonder. "Each step we take creates a ripple in the fabric of time and space, changing the course of history." Just then, they noticed a shimmering gateway hidden in plain sight. It seemed to beckon them, inviting them into an unknown universe. Hesitantly, they stepped through the portal, only to find themselves in a world that was both familiar and strange. As they navigated through divergent lives, their perspectives began to clash. Aria couldn't understand why Alex held back from certain decisions, while Alex wondered how Aria could be so reckless. Frustration simmered beneath the surface, until it finally erupted in a heated argument. "You don't know what it's like!" Alex cried, their voice echoing through the unfamiliar streets. "You can't just dismiss our experiences as if they don't matter." In that moment, a powerful being appeared before them. It spoke with the soft certainty of fate, testing their choices and decisions. As they faced their own reflections in this unknown world, Alex was forced to return, forever changed by their experience. Back in their original world, Alex found solace in the wisdom of a street performer's act. "Each choice we make is like a stone thrown into a pond," the performer said, his hands moving gracefully as he wove a tale of ripples and consequences. With newfound understanding, Alex resolved to apply this lesson to their life, creating a more balanced existence. Together, they embraced the power of choice and its effects on their lives and countless others in the tapestry of time and space. United by their experiences, Alex and Aria were ready to face whatever challenges lay ahead, hand in hand as they continued to explore the mysteries of alternate histories and parallel universes. Alex and Aria stood before the mysterious gateway, their hearts pounding with anticipation. They were ready to face whatever lay beyond, excited for the possibilities that awaited them. "Do you think this will change our lives forever?" Aria asked nervously, her voice barely a whisper. She clung tightly to Alex's arm, seeking comfort and reassurance. "It has to," Alex replied with determination. "Think of all we could learn about alternate histories and parallel universes! We can use this knowledge to make the world a better place." Suddenly, a booming voice echoed through the air. "Choose wisely, for your decisions will shape not only your lives but those of countless others in the tapestry of time and space." The voice seemed to come from everywhere and nowhere at once, leaving Alex and Aria with chills running down their spines. The gateway shimmered and a new world came into view. They found themselves in a bustling city square, surrounded by people going about their daily lives. A street performer caught their attention, his mesmerizing act weaving a tale of choices and decisions. "Look, Aria!" Alex pointed to the stage. "That's what we need to focus on – the power of choice." "You're right," Aria agreed, her eyes glued to the performance. "Every decision we make has consequences, not just for ourselves but for others as well." As they watched, the performer vanished in a puff of smoke, leaving behind an indelible message: the power of choice was theirs alone, and it would forever change the course of their lives. Together, Alex and Aria embraced this newfound wisdom, ready to face whatever challenges lay ahead and continue exploring the mysteries of alternate histories and parallel universes. Alex and Aria stood at the crossroads of time, their eyes locked on the shimmering gateway before them. The air was thick with anticipation as they took their first steps towards the unknown universe. "Do you think we'll find answers here?" Aria asked nervously, her voice barely audible. "Only one way to find out," Alex replied confidently, taking a deep breath and stepping through the gateway. As soon as they entered, their surroundings transformed. They found themselves in an alternate world, where time flowed differently, and history was rewritten. The two explorers exchanged glances, realizing they had stumbled upon a divergent timeline. "We have to be careful," Alex warned Aria, "Every decision we make here could alter the course of this universe's history." They continued exploring, witnessing the consequences of different choices and decisions made by people in this world. As they delved deeper into alternate lives, they began to understand the delicate balance between fate and free will. One day, while navigating through a bustling city, they came across a street performer who captivated their attention with his mesmerizing act. The performer's words held wisdom and insight that resonated deeply within them: "The choices we make shape our destiny, but it is the balance between them that defines our true selves." Alex and Aria knew they had to return to their original world, forever changed by their journey. With newfound wisdom from the street performer's act, Alex resolved to apply it to their life, creating a more balanced existence while continuing to study alternate histories and parallel universes. Together, they embraced the power of choice and its effects on their lives and countless others in the tapestry of time and space, ready to face whatever challenges lie ahead. The powerful being tested choices and decisions. "You see," the being said, its voice echoing through the vast expanse of the unknown universe, "choices and decisions shape the very fabric of existence. They create worlds and destroy lives, and in doing so, they define the tapestry of time itself." Alex, stunned by the revelation, looked at Aria with newfound understanding. "We've been studying alternate histories and parallel universes," Alex said, their voice wavering with emotion, "but this... This is a whole new level of complexity. It means that every decision we make has consequences far beyond what we could have ever imagined." Aria nodded, her eyes wide with wonder. "But if choices and decisions are so powerful, does it mean we can control the course of history?" she asked, her voice filled with hope. The powerful being smiled, a mysterious expression that seemed to encompass millennia of wisdom. "Control is an illusion," it replied, its voice echoing like a cosmic whisper through the air. "You can influence, you can shape, but ultimately, you cannot control the course of history. The future is a tapestry woven by countless threads, and each choice and decision adds another strand to the fabric." Alex and Aria exchanged glances, their minds whirring with new insights. They knew that they had been granted a rare gift - the ability to see the interconnectedness of all things, and the power of choice that resided within them. With this understanding came a sense of responsibility, a call to action. Together, they embraced their destiny and continued to explore the vast expanse of time and space, ready to face whatever challenges lay ahead. Alex and Aria found themselves standing in front of an ancient door, its carvings telling tales of another world. The line that separated them from the unknown hummed with energy, inviting them to step across. "What if we just go?" Aria whispered, her eyes wide with wonder. "What if we don't come back?" Alex replied, his voice steady. "We can't be afraid of the unknown, Aria. We were made for this." With a deep breath, they reached out to touch the line, and as their fingers brushed against it, they felt a surge of power course through them. "Wait, is this really happening?" Aria asked, her voice trembling with anticipation. "It's real," Alex reassured her, the world around them shifting and twisting like a kaleidoscope. "We're in another place now." In this new universe, they met beings of unimaginable power and faced decisions that could change their lives forever. With each step, they learned about the impact of choices and how every decision shaped their existence. And as they embraced the power of choice, Alex and Aria realized they had the ability to change not only their own fates but those of others as well. "We have to take responsibility for our actions," Alex told Aria, his voice filled with newfound determination. "And we need to keep exploring, keep making choices." Together, they continued to delve into alternate histories and parallel universes, their bond strengthened by the challenges they had faced and the adventures they would yet discover. And so, armed with the knowledge of their own power and the responsibility that came with it, Alex and Aria set out on their journey through time and space, eager to explore the infinite possibilities of existence. Alex and Aria stared in awe as a strange, ethereal being appeared before them. The being had an otherworldly aura, with shimmering, translucent skin that seemed to change colors like a kaleidoscope. Its eyes held the depth of countless galaxies, and its voice echoed through the cosmos, "I am Zarael, a guardian of time and space. You have stumbled upon an ancient crossroads between universes, and now you hold the power to shape existence itself." "We've never seen anything like this before," Aria whispered to Alex, her voice trembling with fear and wonder. "What are we supposed to do?" Alex took a deep breath, trying to calm his racing heart. "Zarael said that our choices can change the course of time. We have to decide which path to take and learn from our experiences in these alternate universes." "But how do we know which decision is right?" Alex asked, looking at Zarael with newfound determination. "By embracing the power of choice," Zarael replied, its voice like a gentle whisper through the cosmos. "Take responsibility for your actions and learn from each experience. Only then will you truly understand the implications of your decisions." With newfound purpose, Alex and Aria embarked on their journey through time and space, facing life-altering decisions and exploring alternate histories. Along the way, they discovered the importance of choices and the power they held in shaping existence itself. Their bond grew stronger with each challenge they faced, and together, they continued to explore parallel universes, embracing the incredible power of choice. A sudden flash of light emanated from the mysterious portal, illuminating the faces of Alex and Aria as they stood at the crossroads of time. Zarael's voice echoed through the air, "Choose wisely, for your decisions will ripple through the fabric of existence." Alex turned to Aria with a determined glint in his eyes. "We can't just stand here and let history be dictated by others," he declared. Aria nodded in agreement, her bravery shining through her fear. "Let's explore these alternate realities together," she whispered, her heart pounding in her chest. In one universe, they found themselves in the midst of a bustling medieval marketplace. The sounds of laughter and commerce filled their ears as they watched merchants bargaining over goods and peasants going about their daily routines. Alex leaned closer to Aria, his voice barely above a whisper. "Imagine if we could change this moment. Maybe we could prevent war or bring prosperity to the people." Aria smiled softly, her eyes twinkling with excitement. "We could help them build a better world," she replied, her gaze locked on the scene before them. With newfound purpose, they continued their journey through time and space, learning from each alternate reality and growing stronger together. As they faced the challenges of these parallel universes, their bond only grew more resilient. Through Zarael's guidance, Alex and Aria learned that every choice they made had far-reaching consequences. They embraced their responsibility to shape existence and time itself, knowing that their actions would forever impact the lives of countless beings across the multiverse. In the end, they realized that it wasn't just the power to change history that mattered, but the strength of their unity and the depth of their commitment to each other and the worlds they inhabited. The sun dipped below the horizon, casting a warm glow over the small village as Alex and Aria walked hand in hand through the cobblestone streets. "I've always loved the way the light fades here," said Aria, gazing up at the sky. "It's like time itself is slowing down." "And that's when we found the gateway," added Alex with a smile. "A hidden doorway between universes, just waiting for us to discover it." Suddenly, a figure appeared before them, their form shimmering with an ethereal light. "I am Zarael," they introduced themselves, "and I have come to guide you on your journey through time and space. The choices you make can shape existence itself." With newfound determination, the two friends embarked on their mission, navigating alternate histories and learning the importance of choice and responsibility. Through each challenge, they found their bond growing stronger, understanding that it wasn't just the power to change history that mattered, but their unity and commitment to one another and the worlds they explored. And so, as the sun set on yet another day, Alex and Aria continued their journey, knowing that together, they could face any obstacle and protect the very fabric of reality. Alex and Aria stood before the ancient gateway, their hearts pounding with anticipation. The air crackled with energy, as if time itself held its breath in expectation. "Are you ready?" Aria asked, her voice a whisper amidst the silence. "As ready as I'll ever be," Alex replied, gripping his pendant tightly. "You must remember," Zarael warned them, "that each choice you make has consequences far beyond your comprehension. The power to change history lies within your hands." With that, she opened the gateway, and a kaleidoscope of alternate realities swirled before their eyes. "I can't believe we're really doing this," Aria exclaimed, as they stepped through the gateway into a world where Alex was never born. "We have to find our way back to our own timeline," Alex said determinedly, taking on the responsibility of guiding them through the labyrinth of history. "I'm with you until the end," Aria assured him, her resolve unwavering. Together, they navigated through parallel universes filled with wonder and despair, each decision bringing them closer to understanding the true significance of their choices. As they journeyed, their bond deepened, forged by shared experiences and mutual trust. Finally, they found themselves at the intersection of all realities, where Zarael awaited them. "You've seen the power of choice," she said, her gaze locked with theirs. "Now return to your world, and never forget the lesson you've learned." With a final nod, Alex and Aria stepped back through the gateway, knowing they were forever changed by their journey. Alex and Aria stood before the ancient gateway, their hearts pounding with anticipation as the air crackled with energy. Zarael, the powerful being, warned them that each choice they made had consequences far beyond their comprehension. "Remember," Zarael advised, "your choices echo through the fabric of existence." As they ventured into alternate realities, Alex and Aria found themselves in a world where the Great War never ended. They witnessed the devastation, feeling the weight of countless lives lost. "We must find a way to prevent this," Aria whispered to Alex. Together, they tried different approaches, from diplomacy to brute force, but nothing seemed to work. Exhausted and heartbroken, they retreated through the gateway. In another reality, they arrived in a utopia where technology had advanced beyond their wildest dreams. People lived in harmony with nature, and everyone was cared for. However, Alex noticed something unsettling. "Aria, look at the people. They're all... empty." He realized that in this world, emotions were suppressed to maintain peace. They decided to leave and found themselves back at the gateway. Back with Zarael, they shared their experiences. "We can't change history without understanding the consequences," Aria said. Alex nodded. "But we can learn from these realities and make better choices in our own." Zarael smiled. "That is the true power of choice." With renewed determination, Alex and Aria faced the ancient gateway once more, knowing that the power to shape existence was in their hands. As they stood before the gateway, Aria couldn't help but ask the question that had been lingering in her mind, "What if we made a wrong choice, Zarael?" The mysterious being looked into their eyes and replied, "There is no right or wrong, Aria. Every decision shapes our reality in its own way. We simply learn from each one." Alex added, "But how do we know which choice to make? There are so many possibilities!" Zarael smiled, "The answer lies within you both. Trust your instincts and embrace the power of choice. You'll find that each decision brings you closer to your true purpose." With newfound determination, they ventured into another parallel universe, where a great war had never ended. The devastation around them weighed heavily on their hearts, and Aria couldn't help but cry out in frustration. "Why can't we just choose peace?" Alex, ever the optimist, placed his hand on her shoulder, reassuring her, "We will, Aria. We will." As they continued to explore different realities, they encountered a world where technology had advanced exponentially but emotions were suppressed. It was in this place that Aria truly understood the importance of choice and expression. She turned to Alex, tears in her eyes, "I never realized how important our emotions are until now." Alex nodded, his voice filled with emotion, "And we have the power to choose how we feel, and what we create. We must never forget that." Standing once more before the gateway, Aria and Alex knew they were ready to face whatever lay ahead, armed with the knowledge that their choices shaped not only their own lives but the very fabric of existence itself. Alex and Aria found themselves standing in front of the gateway once more, the air buzzing with anticipation. They glanced at each other, their eyes filled with resolve. "Do you think we're ready for this?" Aria asked, her voice trembling slightly. "As ready as we'll ever be," Alex replied, trying to sound confident. "We've seen the consequences of our actions in so many different realities. We can only hope that we've learned enough from them." They exchanged a glance, nodding in agreement before stepping forward into the gateway. As they crossed over into another universe, their footsteps echoed through time and space. Suddenly, they found themselves surrounded by a bustling city, its inhabitants oblivious to the pair's presence. Aria couldn't help but marvel at the advanced technology before them. "Look at this place!" she exclaimed. "It's like something from our wildest dreams!" Alex nodded in agreement, but his eyes were filled with sadness. "Yes, it is... But there's a cost, Aria. They may have achieved progress, but they've lost touch with their emotions." "We can't let that happen to us," Aria vowed. "No matter where we go or what we see, we won't lose sight of who we are." With determination in their hearts, Alex and Aria continued their journey through the multiverse, knowing they were ready for whatever challenges lay ahead. Alex and Aria stood before the hidden gateway, their hearts pounding with anticipation. As they hesitantly stepped through, Zarael appeared, welcoming them to the crossroads of time. "Choose wisely," he warned, "for each path you take will shape existence itself." In one parallel universe, Alex and Aria found themselves amidst a never-ending great war. The toll it took on the inhabitants was palpable; their once vibrant cities now lay in ruins. Desperate for peace, they sought out the leaders of both factions, pleading for understanding and compromise. In another universe, advanced technology brought convenience and efficiency, but at a cost. Emotions were suppressed to maintain order, and people lived lives devoid of passion or connection. Alex and Aria were struck by the emptiness they felt in this reality, and knew that something was missing. As they returned to their own universe, Alex and Aria were forever changed. They understood the power of choice, and how each decision could either create a harmonious world or lead to disaster. Standing before the gateway again, they vowed not to lose sight of who they were, despite the challenges they had faced in alternate realities. And with newfound wisdom, they embarked on their journey home, ready to embrace the choices that lay ahead and reshape their existence for the better. Alex looked at Aria, her eyes filled with determination. "We have to choose, Aria," he said firmly. "Each decision we make has consequences, and sometimes, those choices change the course of history." Aria nodded, understanding the weight of their words. "But I believe in us," she replied confidently. "Together, we can learn from these alternate realities and make better decisions in our own world." As they ventured through the gateway, the duo found themselves in a universe where a great war never ended. Soldiers marched endlessly, their faces etched with exhaustion and despair. Alex and Aria could feel the heaviness of this reality weighing down on them. "We need to find a way to end this war," Alex whispered. In another universe, they witnessed advanced technology but suppressed emotions. People communicated through holographic screens, their expressions hidden behind masks. The air was thick with tension and unspoken words. Aria's voice trembled as she spoke. "We must find the balance between technology and emotion. If we don't, we risk losing our humanity." With each alternate reality they visited, Alex and Aria learned valuable lessons. They saw the consequences of different choices and began to understand the true power of choice. Standing before the gateway once more, they knew that shaping existence was in their hands. They vowed not to lose sight of who they were despite the advanced technology and suppressed emotions they witnessed in other universes. And with that promise, they stepped through the gateway, ready to face the challenges ahead. Alex and Aria stood before the ancient gateway, feeling the rush of excitement that always accompanied their adventures. "I wonder what universe we'll visit this time," Aria mused aloud. "It could be anywhere, Aria," Alex replied, his eyes scanning the shimmering portal. "Let's go." As they stepped through, the air around them shifted, and they found themselves in a world where a great war never ended. The battle-scarred landscape stretched out before them, with soldiers clashing in an endless conflict. "This is... intense," Aria whispered, her eyes widening as she took in the scene. "Why would we be brought here?" Alex frowned, pondering their purpose. "Maybe it's a reminder that even the most dire situations can change with the right choices," he suggested. Suddenly, they were elsewhere - a world of advanced technology and suppressed emotions. People moved in robotic patterns, their faces void of any expression. It was eerie, but Aria found something else that intrigued her. "Look, Alex!" she exclaimed, pointing at an old book tucked away in a corner. "It's like this place has forgotten the importance of emotions." Alex nodded, picking up the book and leafing through its pages. "We can learn from both worlds," he said, his voice low. "In one, we see the power of choice in shaping existence, and in the other, we see the consequences of ignoring our emotions." They stepped back through the gateway, their minds filled with newfound understanding. As they reentered their own universe, Alex held Aria's hand tightly. "We won't lose sight of who we are," he vowed. "No matter where we end up." "Crossroads of Time," Alex and Aria encounter Zarael at a hidden gateway between universes, learning that their choices can shape existence and time itself. As they journey through alternate histories, they embrace choice and responsibility while strengthening their bond. In one universe, they find themselves in the midst of a never-ending war, witnessing the devastation and heartbreak it causes. In another universe, advanced technology dominates life, but emotions are suppressed to maintain order. Alex and Aria reflect on these experiences and understand that the true power of choice lies in learning from past realities to make better decisions in their own. Alex: "I never realized how much our choices could change everything." Aria: "It's amazing to think that we can shape existence itself, don't you think?" Zarael: "But with great power comes great responsibility. Remember that as you navigate the crossroads of time." As they continue their journey, Alex and Aria grow more confident in their ability to make a difference. They vow never to lose sight of who they are, no matter what universe they find themselves in. Standing before the gateway once again, they know that shaping existence is in their hands. Alex looked at Aria, his eyes filled with determination. "We have to make the right choices," he said softly, his voice echoing through the silent halls of the ancient castle. "We can't let history repeat itself." Aria nodded, her heart pounding in her chest. "But how do we know which choices are right?" she asked, her voice barely a whisper. "By learning from those who came before us," Alex replied, his voice steady and sure. "We must seek wisdom from the ancients, understand their struggles, and learn from their mistakes." As they walked through the castle's halls, the walls seemed to come alive with the stories of the past. They heard whispers of great battles, tales of love and loss, and songs of triumph and tragedy. In one universe, they witnessed the horrors of a never-ending war, its devastation echoing through time like a haunting melody. In another, they saw advanced technology that suppressed emotions for order's sake, leaving a world devoid of passion and joy. Through it all, Alex and Aria held onto each other, their bond strengthened by the weight of the choices they faced. They knew that shaping existence was in their hands, and they vowed never to lose sight of who they were despite the different realities they witnessed. Together, they stepped through the gateway once more, armed with the knowledge of history and the power of choice. In a world where time was malleable and histories collided, Alex and Aria found themselves face to face with Zarael, a mysterious figure who guarded the secret gateway between universes. As they ventured deeper into the unknown realms, their hearts pounded in unison, each step bringing them closer to an understanding of their own existence. Alex turned to Aria, his eyes wide with wonder. "I never thought we'd find something like this," he whispered, his voice barely a whisper amidst the swirling winds of time. Aria nodded, her gaze locked onto Zarael who stood before them, an enigma wrapped in a cloak of shadows. "Choose wisely," Zarael warned, his voice echoing through the air as he gestured towards the gateway that shimmered with the essence of countless realities. "The consequences of your decisions ripple across the tapestry of time." With a final look at Alex and Aria, Zarael disappeared, leaving them to ponder their newfound power. Alex clenched his fists, determination etching lines onto his face. "We can't let history repeat itself," he declared, his voice firm and unwavering. Aria nodded in agreement, her eyes filled with resolve. They knew they had to learn from those who came before them, to navigate the treacherous waters of fate and choice. "Let us take this journey together," Aria said softly, her voice barely a whisper amidst the roaring winds of time. Alex smiled, his gaze locked onto hers, and together they stepped through the gateway, ready to shape existence and make better decisions in their own universe. As Alex and Aria stood at the threshold of the hidden gateway, they couldn't help but feel a sense of urgency. The air around them crackled with energy, as if the very fabric of reality was shifting beneath their feet. Suddenly, a figure materialized before them - Zarael, an enigmatic being from beyond their universe. "You are not ready," he warned, his voice echoing through the gateway. "But you must choose. The fate of countless worlds hangs in the balance." Alex's eyes widened, taking in the weight of Zarael's words. Aria grasped his hand tightly, a silent promise passing between them. "We can do this," she whispered, her voice shaking with determination. And so, they ventured forth, navigating the labyrinthine paths of alternate histories and realities. Along the way, they encountered countless versions of themselves, some successful and wise, others lost and broken. Through it all, Alex and Aria clung to each other, a beacon of hope amidst the chaos. "We can't let this happen again," Alex vowed, his voice filled with resolve. "No matter what, we have to learn from them." Aria nodded, her eyes locked on the distant gateway that would lead them back to their own universe. Together, they stepped through the threshold once more, armed with the knowledge of history and the power of choice. And as they emerged into their familiar world, they vowed never to lose sight of who they were - or forget the lessons they had learned in the crossroads of time.

[snarkywrites]

Saturn Direct: Onward

Saturn stations direct on September 29th, 2020 and we can all breathe a little better knowing that one of the astro  giants is finally moving on. We have been on a ride with Saturn in Capricorn since 2017, learning a lot about ourselves and our relationship with authority. We continue to experience the impact of government with these Saturn and Pluto transits. Where we are now is not the same place, we were several years ago. This has been a transit of maturity of growth and pain. Many people saw the world with new eyes, our rose-colored glasses were shattered. The horrors were outlined for us, but we have also learned to see some hope in the darkest of hours. Saturn in Capricorn has exposed the changes that need to be made on a societal and political level. This has been a powerhouse transit, moving and reshaping us from the core and reflecting in our environment. The collective has felt Saturn in Capricorn, but we know that together, we can all hope for greater change in the future after learning the lessons and facing the consequences from this transit. Here’s to growth for the years to come and hope for a better tomorrow.

Aries – Saturn has placed you in a position where you can either sink or fly. If you have worked and powered through the last couple of years, with the fire and drive of not giving up, congratulations! Saturn direct means you can continue to go forward without feeling blockages when it comes to your career. However, with your ruler currently retrograde it is still not smooth sailing. Consider this a time to get your plans going and feel the momentum building until dreams start to take off in November.

Taurus – This transit will have you sticking to your convictions without second guessing yourself. Saturn direct powers you through the next phase which will have you more focused on status and achievements. You are very much in a contemplative state, analyzing your past achievements and failures but the good thing is you are learning from them. Get ready to feel more empowered as we approach the end of the year.

Gemini – You have been going through one of the harshest transits for the last 2.5 years but now you are slowly feeling the weight being lifted from your shoulders. That sense of optimism will begin to peak through with Saturn finally going direct and exiting Capricorn at the end of the year. Use what you have learned during this transit that has shaped who you are and where you will be headed. You are not the same person from 2017, instead you have grown and matured. The road has been tough, but you will see how the journey was worth it.

Cancer – Saturn direct means you will finally be able to see the truth behind your relationships. No longer will you feel like you are mirroring partners because now you have grown to learn more about yourself and what you seek in someone else. This Saturn transit has been rough but empowering. There is more motivation to get the achievement you desire and the recognition from your peers. You are learning to embrace the limelight and to allow yourself to shine. No more hiding your glow since you have so much more to offer to the world.

Leo – You have given it your all during this Saturn transit since 2017. There have been a lot of obstacles for you to overcome but Saturn has taught you a lot about being diligent and patient. You have learned that even if you give it your all, you are still going to face challenges and the outcome will not be what you originally planned. You’ve excelled at coordinating, fought and learned to understand your limits while refusing to back down or give up. During the next several months you are rekindling with your fire energy thanks to the trine your sign is making to Mars. You can see the finish line and are awaiting your victory.

Virgo – The state of your romantic life is probably not the same as it was 2.5 years ago. Saturn might have brought about a person who turned your world upside down but the experience, although tough, was a learning lesson for you. For those who are single, this transit made a change in your social circles. During the retrograde it was possible you reminisced and learned about the changes you need to make for romances. Your dynamics with others will also change moving forward. Saturn direct will have you focused on rebuilding and restructuring how you view yourself and your ideology.

Libra – One of the tougher transits for you and it would make sense why you will not miss seeing Saturn in Capricorn. The retrograde period brought you back to your roots and the emotional experiences you might have felt with partners. This Mars retrograde might also have brought back some painful memories that you need to learn to cope with to move forward. Mars and Saturn are making you move from the tough waves that life brings you and the unexpected changes. Your identity has changed because you might feel more empowered and mature given the position you have been put in. It is possible you were thrown into a leadership role at work, school or even made some tough decisions at home. Saturn showed you what you were capable of and how independent you can be.

Scorpio – A rough transit to have because it can open some emotional wounds you might have at home or with friendships. Saturn retrograde taught you that to interact with people, you need to listen and be patient. Being explosive during this transit over the last several years has led you nowhere. To avoid drama and fights, you needed to truly listen and change some mannerisms. You have developed a sense of courage, especially in the workplace or school. With this planet finally going direct, you know your strengths, how good you can articulate your thoughts and how to manage situations with different groups of people.

Sagittarius – This Saturn transit has felt like a redo of Saturn in your sign. You continued to face similar challenges with identity and truly learning the meaning of independence. Saturn in Capricorn taught you to be more open to accepting and forgiving yourself and this is what you are working on now that the planet is direct. The boost from Mars will allow you to burn through the emotions as you continue to reshape your thoughts and philosophy during this process. Get ready for some excitement as you can feel the cashflow begin to change and the optimism growing since Jupiter, your ruler, is also direct.

Capricorn – Who am I? Is the question you probably repeated to yourself several times during this transit. Saturn retrograde had you pouring through different situations as you tried to maintain stability in your life while the chaos ensued. You are the fighter, with Pluto, Jupiter, and Saturn currently in your sign. The pressures and responsibilities piled but you managed to keep your cool (sort of). Now with Saturn and Jupiter doing direct, you can once again plan and see the road ahead with clearer eyes and a smile. You will feel renewed as Saturn stays for the next few months before finally exiting your sign.

Aquarius – With Saturn direct here, you feel some of your pressures melting off as you come to peace with your subconscious. The issues now with Saturn will involve your own maturity but that all begins to manifest when Saturn enters the sign of Aquarius. This is a period where you will be mentally stimulated, driven to connect with others and will discover your own inner voice. Many will be open to listening to what you have to say. Your experiences can serve as a healing experience as well. Saturn has taught you how to heal, to grow and to motivate others. You will wake up from the cloudiness Saturn presented and will take on the world inspired.

Pisces – The pressure is off and now you can once again feel like others have your back. Saturn direct will have you remembering the pain or excitement you felt during this transit. There might have been close friendships that have ended but you made new ones. This path has not been an easy one for you and Saturn in Aquarius will present some of the similar themes from this transit. You are learning to become more independent and self-reliant. However, you will also learn to seek help from others if you are in need because certain situations can be hard for us and we will need the support system from others.  

[writingdayandnight]

Line Without a Hook - Rafael Barba Imagine

Pairing: Rafael Barba x Reader (Fem. Pronouns) 

Word Count: 2650

A/N: Inspiration struck, perhaps a little OOC. Will probably go back later and edit. Just a little treat for everyone who misses Barba like I do. 

10:56 PM.

There was not a doubt in Rafael’s mind that he would not be home until after midnight. This case had been excruciating--brutal, really. Everyone had been pushed to their breaking point. Blood, sweat, and tears were poured into this case.

And here Rafael was with a pen cap fastened between his teeth, struggling to write an opening argument. It all seemed trivial. That words had the power to make or break a month’s worth of hard work. And that all he could think about was going home to his partner. 

He wouldn’t allow himself the privilege of a break until he finished his opening and prepped the summations, which was always his least favorite part. Tying everything together with a neat bow seemed to minimize the effort put into seeking justice. But it was his strong suit. There wasn’t a jury he couldn’t convince if given enough leeway during summations. 

His mind wandered yet again, back to the person that was waiting for him. He knew she would still be waiting for him when he got home, undoubtedly doing work of her own. She found solace in the quiet of the night. She would sit at the dining table with papers scattered across the surface, highlighters uncapped, lukewarm tea cooling unforgotten. 

Then there were her expressions. A furrowed brow while drafting a proposal. A lip bite accompanied by pensive tapping on the table. Her head slowly moving to the beat of the music that was playing from the speaker in the corner of the room. An exasperated sigh escaping as she typed another after-hours email. All of these things were the tiny details that Rafael loved noticing, learning, anticipating.

Finally, Rafael caved and placed a long-awaited phone call.

“Raf,” she answered, voice as tender as kiss goodbye.

“Cariño,” he replied, feeling a million times better just knowing she was on the opposite end of the line.

“When will you be home?” He could hear her trying to hide a yawn behind the scenes.

“Not any time soon.”

“Rafael, please take care of yourself,” she pleaded, yet it was to no avail. She knew this.

“I have to finish this prep, Cariño.” He could hear her eyes roll from across the line, “I bet you’re still doing work, too.”

“That’s none of your business,” she retorted, with a guilty shift in energy. 

“Take care of yourself,” he repeated, “I’ll be home soon. Don’t wait up.” 

“I love you.”

His heart grew full, “I love you more.”

Rafael ended the call, reclining in his leather chair. He had been overcome by love, both for his partner and for the way his life had been going lately. Despite the monstrosities he witnessed at work, everything had been going well. Even then, he enjoyed working with his coworkers; they acted as a support system, making the job a little more bearable. 

Then there was his love life. For once, everything was going right. He felt loved, supported, and capable of doing the same for his partner. It had been too long since he had that privilege. He knew too well the outcomes of a loveless life and he was trying desperately to escape them. Deep down, he understood that he didn’t deserve that. 

But there were times where he thought he didn’t deserve the love he had stumbled into. Never in a million years would he have thought that he would have fallen in love with the girl from the bar. 

The rain had finally let up outside, encouraging a few stragglers to clear the bar. Rafael remained, nursing a scotch on the rocks, muttering to himself about the news on the television overhead. It was a bunch of nonsense about the news anchor he and the SVU squad had just charged. He couldn’t listen much longer. 

A gust of wind hit as the door to Forlini’s opened; it sent shivers down Rafael’s back. Inquisitively, Rafael turned to see the person who just waltzed into the bar. Much to his surprise, it was a beautiful woman. He smirked and returned to his drink, secretly hoping that she would find her way to the bar.

She did just that, taking a seat two stools down from Rafael. He continued to watch the television, discreetly listening to her conversation with the bartender. Small talk. Nothing more, nothing less. Aside from her order--a vodka cranberry. 

“Will you get a load of this idiot?” She chirped, scoffing at the story of the news anchor. Her head was tilted in Rafael’s direction. 

He took a moment to answer, pausing to make sure she was directing her remarks towards him. 

“He’s surely a handful,” Rafael replied. 

Just then, his face appeared on the television screen. They had played his interview on the courthouse steps. He had been ambushed by the press, and even though he delivered better than most, it was not his best work. He silently thanked the Lord that the sound was off.

“Is that you?” She asked, spinning in her seat to face Rafael.

“Yes, it is.”

“It’s a shame, you look better in person,” she tisked, taking another sip of her drink.

Rafael couldn’t respond out of awe. No, that wasn’t the right word. He couldn’t respond because he was flustered. That was a first. 

“Sorry, it’s the vodka talking,” she retracted, making a face that suggested she was embarrassed. 

“No, I’m flattered. It’s not everyday the pretty girl at the bar tells me how attractive I look while sulking alone.”

“This is your version of sulking? Sitting at a bar surrounded by a bunch of people?”

“Perhaps,” he smirked, “Rafael,” he offered his hand.

“Y/N.”

“Beautiful name for a beautiful woman.”

“I was named after a comic book character, please don’t give my parents that kind of credit,” she laughed. It was contagious, infecting Rafael with an affliction that could not be easily cured. Not without an exchange of numbers and a couple of dates.

The memories of their first meeting flooded Rafael’s mind. It further distracted him from the task at hand. But how could he not think of the most impactful night of his life? Screw graduating from law school or getting promoted; nothing could top falling in love with Y/N. 

Nothing could top her love. From the little notes she dropped in Rafael’s briefcase to the silent support she offered when Rafael was not strong enough to ask for it. That’s when his mind wandered even farther, thinking back to the night he decided he was in love with Y/N. 

Rafael sat on the couch in a near-catatonic state. He couldn’t muster enough energy to move. His mind kept circling back to the horrors he had witnessed over the past 24 hours. In his ten years, never once had a case hit him this hard. It just cemented the callousness of man, something he had been trying to deny for so long. There was no such thing as a good person.

There was a knock at the door, a sound that should have startled him. Instead he was too lost in thought to react. He simply got up from the couch and headed to the door, only to be greeted by Y/N on the other side. 

“Rafael,” she mused, before noticing the hurt behind his eyes, “What’s wrong? Are you okay?”

She invited herself in, dropping her overnight bag by the door. Concern washed over her.

Rafael tried to speak but no words came out. He couldn’t find the right thing to say. His choices were to expose Y/N to the horrors of his job or simply keep it bottled up. His choice was the latter; he couldn’t bear the thought of unloading this grief on her. 

“Raf, please talk to me,” she quietly pleaded. 

He did not respond. Instead, he made his way to the couch, taking a seat in the same spot he had been sulking in for the past three hours. 

Y/N followed without command. She rested her head on his shoulder, wrapping her hands gently around his arm. She placed a kiss on his cheek. It made Rafael’s heart jump, yet he still remained silent. 

But that didn’t deter Y/N. She remained glued to his side, occasionally laying a gentle kiss on him or drawing circles on his bicep. She didn’t push; she knew better than that. Still, just her presence brought Rafael to his knees. 

After an hour or so, Rafael could feel her heartbeat slow. He could see her eyes fluttering shut from the corners of his. 

“I love you,” he whispered, hoping that she wouldn’t hear. Rafael felt guilty saying those words for the first time in such a terrible state. 

“I love you more,” she replied, drifting into a slumber in his arms. 

Rafael knew this could never be true. 

The hands on the clock seemed to turn at an unprecedented pace, yet Rafael had gotten little done. It all seemed pointless. There had to be more to life than this. Hours spent in some poorly-lit office drinking dirt flavored coffee, waiting for his mind to stop running a marathon so he could focus. Watching people suffer everyday for some little bit of justice. Doubting the existence of good in the world with every passing moment. 

But the thing he couldn’t stand was being away from the love of his life. For such a pointless endeavor. It was pointless, but it wasn’t what he wanted. Not anymore. Not with the prospect of love sitting right in front of him. In that moment, he decided to be the most spontaneous he had ever been. 

He whipped open the bottom left drawer of his desk, pulled out a copy of his resignation letter, signed it, and placed it in the mailbox of his boss. He grabbed his jacket, briefcase, and cellphone before practically running to the lobby of Hogan Place. By a stroke of sheer luck, a taxi had been idling outside. Rafael got into the taxi without hesitation--or permission--and called out the address to the apartment he had shared with Y/N. Getting to their front door was his only objective. 

As he settled into the taxi, he reached inside of his briefcase and felt a small item lodged at the bottom. Rafael quizzically pulled it out, determining that it was cube-shaped. As it was illuminated by the passing streetlights, he recognized it instantly. And that’s where he decided to make the best decision of his life. 

“Mami, are you going to be okay if I’m gone for two weeks on vacation?” Rafael asked, changing a lightbulb in his mother’s apartment. 

It was a Saturday which meant it was his day to do chores around his mother’s apartment, with much reluctance on behalf of Lucia, while Y/N went through her laminated chore checklist back at their apartment. Rafael had come straight from his office, totally forgetting his to-dos. Until Y/N reminded him--a pretty common occurrence. 

“I promise, Mijo,” she said, taking his hand and guiding him down the step stool, “I’m just happy you’re taking time off.”

“Me too,” he sighed, a wave of bliss flooding his mind as he thought of going to Greece with Y/N. He’s dreamt of her sunburnt cheeks and wine-stained lips since the moment he bought the tickets. 

“It seems like an awfully romantic vacation. Have you thought about asking yet?” Lucia hinted, pointing to her ring finger. 

Rafael didn’t want to say ‘yes.’ He didn’t want to let her know that he had been planning it since their six-month anniversary. He couldn’t wait to spend the rest of his life with the woman he loved. 

“I’ve considered it,” he teased, “but Greece is too cliche. She wouldn’t appreciate it.”

“You underestimate her, Rafi. She loves you.” 

“And I love her. More than anything.” 

Lucia scoffed, furrowing her brow in disgust.

“Besides you, Mami,” he sang, pulling her in for a hug,

While in Rafael’s arms, Lucia slyly removed a small box from her pocket and slipped it into Rafael’s briefcase. It was his grandmother’s ring, the one she always talked about leaving for him. The one she made sure to mention everyday she was sick. Lucia would never forget something that important. 

Rafael grabbed his belongings with haste, basically throwing $50 at the cab driver, telling him to keep the tip. He slammed the door behind him, jogging to the apartment elevators. He was too lost in thought to greet the doorman or the security guard at the front desk. He was focused on one thing and one thing only.

The elevator couldn’t come fast enough--Rafael tapped his foot anxiously, cursing the damned thing. As soon as it opened, he pushed the 8th floor button at least ten times. He felt a rush of nausea, excitement, fear run over him. The elevator dinged and Rafael ran, rummaging through his pockets for his keys. 

He opened the door as fast as he could, revealing Y/N calmly making a cup of tea in the kitchen. Lamplight illuminated the living room. Her laptop was opened to a document, purple and yellow sticky notes scattered on the table. 2000s Pop Hits playing in the background. He had captured her in her natural element; he was witnessing the essence of Y/N.

“Baby, it’s midnight,” he spoke, calmer than he had been all day. 

“I know, but I was in the zone. I thought you wouldn’t be home tonight,” she answered, walking over to place a kiss on his lips, before strolling back to the kitchen to stop the whistling kettle. 

Rafael’s heart was beating out of his chest. His hands were shaking, mind racing. This was it. This felt right.

“Y/N?” 

“What’s up, babe?” She gently blew on her tea to cool it down. 

“I quit my job today.” 

Y/N almost did a spit, “I’m sorry, what?” She exclaimed.

“I couldn’t do it anymore. It broke me, Y/N.” He sighed, walking to her side, “There are better things in life than case briefs and court.”

Y/N was shocked but supportive, “Well, I’m glad you’re finally free. Why don’t you get ready for bed and sleep for the first time in a decade?” She laughed, placing her hand on his shoulder. 

“There’s one more thing,” Rafael said, reaching into his pocket and for the emerald box that housed his grandmother’s ring, 

Rafael expected the words to escape him; he hadn’t prepared anything in the taxi. These weren’t summations, he needed guidance.

But that didn’t stop him. 

“Y/N, you made me realize that I don’t want to live my life circling the drain and going through the motions. You have brought color to my black and white life. The joy you bring me everyday is immeasurable. Every second I spend away from you makes me feel like the world is ending. I can’t live without you, Y/N. That’s why I’m asking you-” Rafael began to bend his knee before Y/N cut him off.

“Yes! You don’t even have to ask. Yes, yes, yes!” She exclaimed, a tear already sliding down her cheek.

Rafael pulled out his grandmother’s golden ring from the box and slipped it on Y/N’s finger with extra care, as if she was made of glass. Tears had formed in his eyes as well, seeing the ring that reminded him so much of the other most important lady in his life. The most romantic person he had ever met. 

“I love you, Y/N. I wish I could have given you a better proposal, but I couldn’t wait,” he chuckled, once again admiring how well the ring hugged her fingers. 

“If you waited any longer, I was going to ask you,” she laughed, kissing him again and again. “Let’s go to bed,” she whispered, placing a kiss on Rafael’s neck.

[transgenderteensurvivalguide]

So I looked through a detransition blog just out of curiosity, since it was one you reblogged, but now I’m super... freaked out? I have a top surgery consultation in April but now I have this weird fear that I’m faking it or that I’ll regret it afterwards. I’ve identified as somewhere along non-binary and trans (he/they!) for over a year, and I’ve known I’m not a girl for even longer, but now I’m just so afraid that maybe I don’t know myself at all. Do you have any advice on what this is?

Lee says:

Discussing your feelings with a therapist can sometimes help you untangle the anxiety from everything else. It’s reasonable to have some apprehension about a major surgery that can have a big impact on your life because it is a big change- and like any other surgery, it also has medical risk and can result in complications. 

And reading about other people’s feelings about their surgeries can be helpful! I do recommend reading things from people who were happy with the outcome and reading things from people who weren't to get a better perspective on the range of experiences that can exist. Only reading the negative or the positive doesn’t provide a balanced view!

But even if you read other people’s stories, and talk to them about why they feel the way they do about their choices and bodies, nobody else can tell you what you should do for yourself. Even a therapist can’t know for sure if you will regret surgery (or anything else that you choose to do) because nobody can see into the future, see into your heart, and see into mind simultaneously to and determine for certain what it is that you need. 

As soon as I came out as non-binary when I was 15, I started saving money for top surgery. I was someone who ran towards top surgery at full tilt and I didn’t give myself any space for doubt about whether it was the right choice for me because I felt it was the only choice I had-- forwards or nothing. I was pretty severely depressed at the time and had a brief hospitalization the month before I turned 18, and I was sort of pinning all my hopes on top surgery reducing my dysphoria and booting out my depression. So I scheduled my consultation as soon as I turned 18 and was legally an adult and could do so without parental permission. I immediately scheduled my surgery for the soonest available date, and had inverted-T incision top surgery about 3 months after I turned 18.

Now I’m 21 years old, and I’m 3 years and 5 months post-op from my top surgery. 

In retrospect, top surgery was 110% the right choice for me. If I could do it all over again, I’d do it in a heartbeat. Top surgery really did reduce my dysphoria by a significant amount, and that made it easier for me to cope with my depression and other mental health issues. I was proudly parading around the house shirtless as soon as I was able to stop using post-op compression, before my incisions had even healed into scars.

I don’t have any dysphoria about my chest anymore, especially now that I’ve gotten tattoos to cover my scars. I finally feel like I look like how I always knew I was meant to look.

I don’t post pictures of my chest anymore because I have distinguishing tattoos but I’ve posted a few before/after pictures when I was 3 years post-op and I think things have only gotten better now.

I was lucky to not have any complications; I don’t have any nerve pain, and hypertrophic or keloid scarring, and I didn’t need any revisions. But there are some things that are non-ideal compared to if I had just been born with a typical cis-guy flat chest. My nips are a little wonky in color and shape, and I plan on getting medical tattoos at some point to even the edges out. I also have slightly muted sensation in my chest now, so everything is like slightly number than it was before.

When I was pre-op, I did enjoy having nipple sensation that was pleasurable; even though I had inverted t-incision top surgery which preserved the nipple stalk, I still only have tactile, temperature, and pain sensations in my chest. If you put an ice cube on my nipple and my eyes were closed, I’d know it was cold. If you poked me while I was looking away, I’d still feel it. And if you squeezed me, it would hurt. But somehow it doesn’t feel good anymore like it used to. 

I don’t know how much of that loss in erotic sensation is a mental thing and how much is a physical change caused by scar tissue build up around the nerve. But regardless, it is a real loss. 

For me, that loss is well worth it. While I might have been physically capable of experiencing erotic nipple/chest sensation before, I rarely actually did have that experience because it made me too dysphoric and I didn’t like to take my shirt off during sex. Now I feel more fully present and comfortable in my own body and it makes me more engaged so I can focus on my partner and on the other feelings I’m having and how I look isn’t something that is detracting from the experience. 

In general, top surgery has made my life better in a million ways. I love running shirtless with my college cross country team, I like going swimming at the beach with no shirt, and I like the way I look now when I see myself in a mirror after stepping out of the shower. 

When I get dressed in the morning, my day starts off on a neutral note because it’s just me putting on clothes. Sometimes I pause to think about how I can just put on a shirt and feel good about it and move on. Before, I used to be upset every morning because the first thing I’d be reminded of when I woke up was that my chest was there and I didn’t want it to be. I’m Autistic, and binding was Not comfortable for me sensory-wise, so not having to bind was also nice.

I would choose to get top surgery again, but that doesn’t mean that it’s the right choice for each and every person. I am sure it was the right choice for me, and I have no regrets at all, I never want to have breasts again. But someone else might think that not having erotic nipple sensation is a dealbreaker, or they might not be comfortable with scars if they tend to heal with more visible raised scars that are harder to cover with a tattoo like I did mine.

So I can tell you that top surgery has made my life better and I’m glad I got it and I don’t think that there would have been any way for me to be as happy as I am now if I had not gotten it. Top surgery is life saving and life-changing for some people, and I am one of those people. I might be more inclined to tell people that if you think you need surgery you should get it because my surgery went so well and because I’m still identifying as genderqueer, transmasculine, and non-binary, just like I was when I was 15, so my identity is pretty static there.

Some other post-op people may tell you that they regret their surgery, that they wish they hadn’t done it, and they would make a different decision if they could go back in time. They might want to help warn other people to not make the same mistake that they did.  Detransitioned folks often (but not always) have a different perspective than folks who persisted in being transgender and that’s okay- it isn’t a better perspective or a worse one, just a different one. But both trans and reidentified people can feel this way, even though it’s usually more common for de-trans folks to regret surgical procedures that it is for trans folks.

I semi-rushed into surgery for both emotional and logistical reasons but I knew it was right for me. But that isn’t the best choice for everyone and if you aren’t 100% sure that it is what you want and need then there’s nothing wrong with having the consultation with the surgeon to learn more and then thinking things over before you schedule a surgery date (or don’t), you don’t need to immediately schedule a surgery date after the consult. Think of it as an interview and as an information gathering session.

Neither of us can tell you what you should do because neither of us are “right” or “wrong” about top surgery. It’s just a different experience and a different perspective. We all have biases based on our own way of seeing things, and that can inform our advice.

If you know what the risks are, and you’ve given it careful thought and can provide an informed consent, then whether you should get surgery is your decision. I won’t tell you “go get it!” or “don’t go get it!” and I don’t think that any blogger should be telling anons what medical procedures to get or not get. 

Worrying that you’re faking it, that you don’t know who you are, and worrying about regret is something that can be pretty scary and frustrating, but you don’t need to figure it out on your own, and it’s okay to take a little longer to come to a decision and talk it over with a therapist if you think it’s necessary to help you cope with that anxiety.

But yeah, I believe that ultimately you have to trust your gut feelings on what you know to be right for you.

Top surgery 101 links

Finding a therapist

Side note: While we do our best to avoid reblogs from obvious TERFs/truscum/transphobes/racists/sexists/ableists/etc to avoid exposing people to triggering content by boosting the blog’s visibility, and we do appreciate getting heads up asks about reblogs from a problematic OP, if we reblog a post from someone we do not necessarily endorse all of the content in every post they’ve made, and we don’t necessarily agree with all of the blogger’s opinions either. We reblog a specific post if we think seeing that post might be helpful for some of our followers.

[avengerscompound]

Until the End of the World - 10

Until the End of the World: A Captain America Fanfic

Masterlist PREVIOUS //

Buy me a ☕ Character Pairing:  Bucky Barnes x Steve Rogers x F!Reader

Word Count:  1801

Rating:  E

Warnings: pregnancy

Synopsis: Four years after Steve and Bucky got to the bottom of the HYDRA conspiracy that had led to you and your son being hunted for the first three years of his life, you, Bucky, and Steve have carved out a nice life together.  Things are calm and you feel like a family unit.  When Geo starts calling Bucky and Steve ‘dad’, a decision is made to try and add to your family.

Things aren’t as calm as they seem.  When your pregnancy hits the papers, HYDRA rears its head once again, and Steve and Bucky need to track you down to protect the family they had created.

Chapter 10

The tabloid sites all latched on to the story of you being pregnant very quickly.  Due to the fact you were often seen out with either Bucky or Steve or both, there had been speculation about who exactly you were.  Theories went from dating one and cheating on them with the other.  Being a ‘close family friend’.  Dating one and the other being a close friend.  Bouncing between them both like a ping-pong ball.  Many fans speculated that they were polyamorous.  Bucky had even made the mistake of going deep into the ‘Avengers fandom’ and discovered people doing what they called ‘shipping’ the three of you together.  Not just the three of you but him and Steve with all kinds of people.  He’d stopped looking when he saw people writing stories about him and Tony together.  It turned out there were things he was better off not knowing.

None of the tabloids ever assumed polyamory though, and neither he nor Steve was going to confirm it for them.  That made your pregnancy the subject of a lot of speculation.  Whose baby was it?  The most loved version of the story was that it was Bucky’s love child conceived while you were cheating on Steve with him.

It was a little stressful, but Bucky had heard worse.  There was still a vocal majority that considered him a threat that should have been tried for his crimes years ago.  Bucky had learned a long time ago not to google himself unless he was feeling particularly self-destructive.  You, on the other hand, were still learning, so it took some reassuring that this matter was no one else's business.

Besides the ever-present gossip mill, things were going well.  Every doctor's appointment showed that the baby was developing well.  All the tests you had were coming back fine.  You seemed to be full of energy and Geo was starting to get excited about the idea of having a little brother or sister.  The new place was nearly finished.  Bucky hadn’t been sent on a mission for a long time.  He felt happy - and that was a feeling he liked to experience as fully as he could because he knew from experience how fleeting it could be.

The three of you had decided to take Geo along to the ultrasound where you’d be finding out the sex.  He had only seen pictures of the baby so far and you’d thought he might like to see them moving around and find out if he was having a brother or a sister.  According to you, the baby was kicking a lot at the moment, so you weren't worried about bad news being delivered.

Geo sat on Bucky’s lap while Steve sat beside you, holding your hand as the technician squeeze the gel onto your stomach.  “Have they been kicking much?”  Brown asked as she began to move the wand around on your stomach.  Bucky looked up at the screen, waiting for the baby to come into view.

You smiled and nodded.  “So much.  The little nugget is going to be a fighter.”

Brown smiled.  “Just like it’s dads, huh?”  She said.  “Has anyone else felt the kicks?”

“Not yet,” Steve answered.  “I can’t wait though.”

The baby came into view on the screen.  You’d been getting pretty regular ultrasounds with your checkups and Bucky liked how the little blob was getting bigger and looking more like a baby every time.  “It shouldn’t be too much longer.  I’d bet by the end of the week you get a little flutter against your hand.”

Steve looked at Bucky and grinned and Bucky couldn’t help but lean over and peck his lips.  Geo didn’t seem that happy with the action and he wriggled in Bucky’s lap.  Bucky chuckled and pulled back.  “Can you see the baby, G?”  He asked, pointing at the screen.

Geo nodded.  “The machine is really cool how it works.  It’s using sound to make the shape of the baby inside mom.”

“That’s right,” Brown said.  “You’re a smart kid.”

Geo looked up at Bucky and grinned obviously very proud of himself.  Bucky smiled and ruffled his hair.

“If you see here,” Brown said.  “This is the baby's head, and their spine.  They have hands and feet and you can even see their toes and fingers…”

Geo watched on fascinated by the digital image of his new sibling.  Not just because that was his new sibling, but because he had a scientific fascination with where it was developmentally and how the machines could show what they show.  He asked lots of questions about whether it could hear or see and how it absorbed food.  Bucky couldn’t really remember what kids were like, and so he had no idea if this was advance thinking for a seven-year-old or not.  He felt like it was advanced though, and he made a mental note to ask you later.

“Do you know if it’s a boy or a girl?”  Geo asked.

“I can find out,” the tech said.  “Is that okay, Captain Rogers?”

Steve chuckled.  “It’s not just my decision to make.”

Brown hid her face behind her hands for a moment and shook her head.  “I’m so sorry, that is such a default reaction.”

“It’s fine,” Steve said.  “Please just relax.  We’re just patients.  And yes, we already decided we wanted to find out.”

She moved the wand around to get it into position.  “Well, bud,” Brown said.  “Did you have a preference?”

“I dunno,” Geo said.  “I don’t have either.”

“Well you don’t have a brother,” Brown said.  “You’re going to have a little sister.”

“It’s a girl?”  Bucky asked, looking over at you and Steve to see your reactions.  Steve looked like he’d been lit up from the inside, and tears had pricked your eyes.

“That’s right.  It’s a girl,” Brown confirmed.

“A little girl,” Steve said, softly.

“Now we have one of each,” Bucky said, and Geo turned around on Bucky’s lap and hugged him.  Bucky closed his arms around the boy, hugging him tightly.  “You’re gonna be such a good big brother,” Bucky whispered as he hugged the boy.

“Do you want any pictures this time?”  Brown asked.

“Yes, please,” you said, quickly.

Brown cleaned off the paddle and pressed the button to print out the photos of the baby.  You grabbed some kleenex from the counter and cleaned the gel off your stomach.  “You think Morgan will be excited there’s going to be another little girl around?”  Steve asked Geo.

“Probably,” Geo said.  “As long as she likes robots too.  Umm… you think the baby will be able to talk to the computers like I can?”

Steve furrowed his brow as he helped you up.  Bucky shook his head to clear it.  It was strange, despite the fact that Geo had powers that he’d clearly gotten from you, and the fact both he and Steve had the Super Serum, the thought of a super-powered baby had never really crossed their minds.  It was like all that was just such a normal part of their lives now, they didn’t really think about how it impacted things.  You didn’t have powers and it was possible the only reason Geo did was that both you and his father had been through experimentation so close to his conception.  It could be that those drugs were now completely out of your system, but no one had thought to look into that first.

“You know what?”  Steve said eventually.  “I don’t know.”

“Probably should have considered that before we dived in with both feet, huh?” You said.

“You could ask your obstetrician about doing an amniocentesis,” Brown suggested.  “Then they could do a genetic workup.  Check for abnormalities.”

“Don’t they have risks involved?”  You asked.

“Sure, but normally it’s one of those things where there are risks involved either way, and you decide which outcome is worse,” Brown explained.

You furrowed your brow and nodded and Bucky wondered what you were thinking.  “Thank you, Miss Brown,” Steve said.  “We’ll see you next time.”

“Of course,” she said, brightly.  “See you.”

The four of you walked out into the ward and headed to the elevator.  “I’m sorry if I upset you,” Geo said as the doors opened.

“You didn’t, G.  Don’t worry,” you assured him, kissing the top of his head.  “It’s just not something we thought about when we probably should have.  Because you got your powers from me and your birth dad, but Bucky and Steve have their own powers.”

“Well, we’re enhanced,” Steve corrected them.  “Not the same as what you have.”

“I think…” Bucky said slowly, aware that this was not a discussion that should be held in front of Geo, but also knowing that the boy needed to be reassured that his powers were not a negative, nor would he be losing the sister he really only just met.  “I think it might be too late to worry about.  I mean… what if they do find out the baby is enhanced?  It’s not like we would love them any less, or not want them.  They’d just be special, like Geo.”

“Of course,” you said quickly.  “We would have done this either way I think.”

“So… let’s just wait and see.  We don’t want to risk anything bad happening,” Bucky said.  “The baby looks normal, so we know it’s not a tentacle beast.”

Geo started laughing.  “That would be so cool.”

“She might not be able to talk to computers even if she does have powers though, G,” you said, stifling your own laugh. “When I had powers I could hear people’s thoughts.  And your dad, he could run really fast.”

“Wow,” Geo said. “I hope she can fly.”

“Oh my goodness,” you said.  “I don’t.”

“Yeah, imagine having to change a diaper on a baby and it’s zooming around over your head,” Bucky said, making Geo breakdown into fits of giggles.

“Alright, Geo,” Steve said.  “You go wash up and we’ll have some lunch.  Do you want to see if Morgan can come to play and you can tell her all about your sister?”

“Yeah, alright,” Geo said, running off to the bathroom.

Steve turned to you and Bucky and took your hands.  “It’s going to be fine,” he said.  “We can face whatever happens, I know we can.”

“Let’s just hope they can’t fly,” you joked.

“We’ll handle that too,” Steve said.

“Yeah, we’ll put a little harness on them, and weigh them down with rocks,” Bucky joked and you burst out laughing.

Steve wrapped his arms around you and pulled Bucky in close so that all three of you were holding each other.  Bucky closed his eyes and breathed you both in, confident that together, you could all handle whatever powers she may or may not have.

// NEXT

[buzzykrueger]

I hope it's just the hiatus that is giving people negative feels regarding Gon and Killua going their separate ways. But the way it was presented and the subsequent launch into what is shaping up to be a long arc without them in it probably had an impact on how people viewed it. I mean, Gon received the same treatment as Illumi of all people from Killua in the election arc (re: leaving with Alluka as a "replacement"). Fingers crossed for reunion, but if there is none, it was a sad end for them.

I know it’s hard to not think negatively but some people get to the point of mischaracterizing Gon and Killua. What some people can’t see is that leaving with Alluka shows how Killua feels about himself and his still ongoing pattern. And not wanting to overbear Gon with his feelings when he’s about to finally meet his dad, while it shows one of the aspects of this pattern, also says everything about how much he actually cares for Gon and want him to be happy. Illumi is literally one of Killua’s abusers and must be taken away from their sight, because Illumi means danger. I can’t think how Gon and Illumi got the same treatment if Killua had to ask Nanika to send Illumi away, while Gon and him mutually agreed to part ways for some time.  

I must say that I dislike the whole “replacement” thing, because Alluka is more than that, she’s someone who, like Gon, loves Killua deeply. And it’s clear that Killua wants to spend time with Alluka and deeply loves her too.

But he’s not replacing a love with another, this is a mix of two things: wanting to be with Alluka because he loves her and wanting to protect Alluka because he needs to feel he’s useful enough to earn her love, since he broke her free by his choice and needs to take responsibility for it. It’s his pattern.

He’s trying to feel he’s needed again, because his self-esteem was shattered into 10.000 pieces. Gon have found Ging, so he probably thinks it’s over for their journey, plus Killua felt rejected when casted away from battle (and it makes a direct parallel to the dodgeball scene because, if “it had to be Killua” before but this time it doesn’t, he took it as a personal rejection) so it’s tough to measure that what happened didn’t erase what Gon have said before about their friendship or rejected him due to not being “helpful” like Gon expected him to be. It’s not random that all of his breakdowns involved wanting to be of any help for Gon.

He lacks experience in healthy relationships, and thanks to the Zoldycks dynamic, he doesn’t know that you don’t have to earn affection by proving you’re useful just like a tool - with no personal feelings and desires, “since you’re not worthy of/don’t need them” ‘cause might give trouble to the person you love and you don’t want to bother at such a difficult time, or you’ll stop “being useful” and rejection is now a possibility ‘cause “you failed”. You just hope to get loved back by doing so, because for you, it’s hard to understand that love can be for free.

When Alluka scolds him when shutting Nanika away, she said she'd hate him and being “rejected by Gon” was painful enough, now Alluka is the only one left who still loves him. So he wants to stay with her while also fearing that he’d be rejected again or at least someone who failed being useful. But this is about Killua self-esteem. He did not mistreated Gon when leaving, he was trying to look confident about his new “goal” while being visibly unsatisfied with the outcome.

This just proves how much he longs to be loved but still having a hard time to learn how to accept it. He’s stuck with that pattern and still uncapable of properly wording his feelings, because vulnerability and being selfless can’t combine. So he chose the other one’s feelings. And letting Gon go is part of this selfless thinking, he wants him to be good for himself.

I know that Gon have always reassured Killua of their friendship and some people might get “damn Killua how can you doubt it?”, implying that Killua was just being unfair. But feelings are not logical, he saw Gon giving up on everything and probably feels like he failed to prevent that from happening, because he couldn’t keep Gon in line this time. This is part of Killua’s mistakes: he needs to rethink this whole unhealthy dynamic of sacrificing, how he bottled up his feelings and created some distance.

I understand how uneasy the separation makes people feel, but I personally can’t think of a better decision for them after all those understandable mistakes. We cant get to see the apology scene, but it’s because either was “incomplete”/unsatisfying or because it wouldn’t add things we don’t know already, so showing us could give the wrong impression like things being done.

They clearly wanted to stay together, but then, what would’ve happened? Things would remain “just fine”, clouded by love, with that needed inner change waiting to be touched. They need to break the pattern and facing the consequences might look a bit extreme, but wasn’t it everything? I hope Alluka someday will say “boy please, go live your life, let your heart speak, it’s not selfish to desire things by your own”. 

[sugoikawaiimiyafuji420]

My Life Can’t Be This Boring! (My Mahjong Tournaments Retrospective)

The Wheel of Fate Is Turning.

Riichi mahjong is a strange game. At its core, it is traditionally a gambling game where players’ necks are at the mercy of Lady Luck’s guillotine. One decision, a doorway brimming with light and hope, could house a grim reaper behind it, waiting to behead you. Obviously, it would sound foolish to compete in such a game where a stroke of misfortune can sway your tournament results, right? Well, jokes on you! I was born a fool, nya!

In these past months, probably nearing two years by now, I have had the chance to participate in multiple online mahjong tournaments. Not that I was bored or anything, but really I was bored and felt like taking a stroll into a psychedelic inner chamber of insanity. And while I may not have had any success in any of the tournaments except for one, going through a mental Hell back and forth was a worthwhile journey, as disbelieving as that may sound. To fight through the unknown, taking on risks, gathering courage while all the same seeing it shattered immediately. In a chaotic, frenzy environment, a slight misstep in decision could lead to a disastrous fall, the end of a tournament life. 

To combat, players equip themselves with knowledge and information accumulated from experience and study materials, allowing them to more accurately read their opponents hands and possibly deduce what they hold. The problem is that with the impact of luck, deduction skills are not foolproof. It is near impossible for players to have a correct assessment at all times, as such skill is resemblant of an upper deity’s. Multiple variations of patterns can occur in a single situation, and using process-of-elimination to narrow down to a specific shape is not viable in nearly all scenarios. As a result, players take every possibility into consideration and assign a risk percentage to each one, leaving the ultimate choice to be a gamble if they want to pursue victory.

With the risk management mindset and the random element established, a single mahjong game is not enough to determine who is the better player. Sure, it may be enough to see the difference between an incredibly bad player and a good player, but it’s not enough between two players with close skill gaps. Only in the long term, as more samples and statistics are recorded, the difference in capability becomes more apparent. With that said, what’s the point of tournaments, an environment where a single game of randomness can decide your tournament life? Why go through such an ordeal only to be unluckily busted out by newbies and pros all alike? I probably have a better time with my tummy out, snacking on ranch doritos while watching Joshiraku and not getting any of the cultural jokes again.

Competitions can turn a man upside down, twirl him around, and put him back upright. A man of pride can enter a competition and leave with the lowest self-esteem. Thoughts of doubt, thoughts of hatred, intermingling with thoughts of confidence and thoughts of goodness in a short span of time. Repulsive elements chaotically intertwine in a downward spiral through a game of randomness, conjuring an experience of pointless meaning but simultaneously a newfound perspective of what it means to fight. 

As one passes through the nauseating wave of emotions and competitive turmoil, stumbling and tumbling, the ocean of misfortune plunges them into the deepest depths of despair. And then at some point, at some space and time, what was left of an emotional resistance becomes a reprieve of the soul. The still body, battered and scarred, floats back to the surface and reaches the shores of enlightenment. 

A state of no expectations, 無心 (mushin), a state of no mind.

A concept in Zen philosophy, mushin is a mindset where one does not expect anything, great or less. What happens, happens, and one reacts accordingly in a simple manner, with no fear and no euphoria behind their actions. Prior, in the whirlwind of emotions, focusing on a grander goal, emphasizing victory, fearing defeat, the dopamine shots of riichi and the dread of dealing in. Packs and layers of such thoughts could obstruct decision-making and lead one astray from the golden path. Reading defense theory, paying attention to the discarded tiles, and calculating probabilities may put one into a state of comfort and control. But that amount of knowledge they put forth does not prevent illogicalness. The tower crafted from collecting information can be easily toppled by a pebble of whimsicality, creating a double-edge sword that challenges one’s beliefs in their learning and casts them back into the fear of the unknown. Thoughts of self-doubt and uneasiness reverberate through the corners of the mind, otherwise known as ‘tilted’. But at the end of the day, all the worries and frustration belong to a natural cycle that one must accept. Being slighted and rejected, experiencing mental pain, expressing sadness is all part of living. Getting hurt is part of the risk and acknowledging that is part of the maturity. Putting forth energy into the extraneous, echoing thoughts hides the core question of what one should be facing at the mahjong table: “Which tile do you discard?”.

Carrying no expectations, be void of outside noises and focus on the task in front of you. The simplicity of it all is in reality, hard to practice since there is a sense of hypocrisy. Mushin is a state of no mind, but that does not mean the absence of critical thinking. Intelligence is not mutually exclusive from mushin. Rather, what mushin means is to free oneself from unnecessary, cumbersome thoughts, to have a quick wit. A punch is thrown and a person dodges. He doesn't think about what happens when he dodges, how to dodge, the advantages of dodging, the fear of failing to dodge, and all those big and however small miscellaneous assortments of dodging thoughts in the heat of battle. He simply dodges with no hesitation.

It lies here where a form of self-confidence starts to sprout. Not being tied down by extravagant thoughts, an appreciation for the simple and mundane act of doing and not doing. Even if a failure occurs, or when things don’t go in a favorable way, to decisively make a choice and accepting all possibilities of the outcome leads to a renewed faith in oneself. The willingness to accept the truth of their existence and dying in comfort knowingly. In mahjong, one can calculate the Bayesian probabilities or make a chart to weigh the benefits and consequences of each choice, but at the end, it is simply whether they want to take the risk and discard that tile. And once one full-heartedly embraces everything about their decision with no hesitation: the worst case scenario, the best case scenario, and everything in-between, their action is an honest and confident representation of their true self.

And there is something unique and transcending when people in earnest are in battle for glory. An experience that is difficult to translate to words, and can seem contradictory. Like two climbers clinging desperately towards the peak of the mountain within the harsh, unpredictable wind of fortune blowing in folly. In those instances of times, the brief silent moments of the cruelty of battle, spark a connectivity between humans. A passage of relatability and a source of warmth in the blizzard. The duality of understanding each other and the acceptance of the death of another, no words spoken in-between. A high-stakes, ephemeral stage: the proof of exchange of one’s life’s emotions and hardwork.

As the conclusion nears, as one eventually falls from the mountain peak, they stare back in wonderment if they were honest in their struggles. Their efforts fading like sand in the wind only to be caught by the love of the sport and rebuilt again.

In turn, the wheel of the competitive cycle continues to spin, the experiences and exchanges among different people help build a steel foundation of perseverance and respect amidst the unexplained insanity of luck and flow. Shifting fortune can strip a person bare whilst making a person wealthy, underlining adaptation and calmness as landscapes morph haphazardly through the flow of time. And while sceneries change into unrecognizable crossroads, walked by new, ever-changing people on their own mental journeys amidst the formidable chaos, the familiar lingerings of the bond that was once felt among the glory mountaintops still remain.

The Wheel of Fate Keeps Turning.

[elaz-ivero]

The Worldbuilding Diaries- Chapter Two; Your Main Character

Main characters are the crux of a story and they can carry it well or sink it in seconds. As I began constructing and developing my main character for my fantasy series I realized that there are lot of things a main character can be and how the way we, as writers navigate creating our main characters can be super influential in the outcome of our stories. 

This post is going to delve into a couple points 

1. What are main characters and what’s their purpose? 

2. How the rest of the cast can effect the mc

2. ...and how to make your mc memorable 

Main characters are the vessels that the events of our stories pass through and their opinions, perceptions and interpretations of events can change depending on who they are, their purpose is to tell the story the way you want it told and to experience as many of the inciting incidents or main events as they can. Sometimes our desires for our main character are incompatable with the plans for our stories for example as I began drafting Project Sun Ballad I realized my main character was stupid...frustratingly stupid and a scaredy cat which was not intentional. He lost all the stubbornness and brute anger I initially intended and as a result the events of the opening chapter felt underwhelming and childish less adult fantasy and more scary Dr.Seuss book. This was because of his new personality and all the softer language I used in my first drafts, so I aged him up into his early twenties and made him slightly more cynical. 

Your main characters personalities should help communicate or add to how your story is relayed. Their voice (the thoughts they add in) should help drive the story forward. Their actions should either have consequences or improve/propell them toward their goal. Your main character can care about everybody or nobody and still make decisions that help or hurt people. Figuring out those consequences or how they are going to learn about a secret meeting via non-coincidental means can help spur your creativity and can lead to some really interesting plot points or scenes. When making your main character imagine that they are the blurb of your story and details about them, their name, where they live and their personality should give the reader information and a basic idea of what they are about to read. 

So you have a main character, they could be a lone-wolf ranger in the wild south with a trusty dog by her side or a glamourous prince suddenly trapped in a heavenly domain but whats just as important is their side kicks, the antagonist in the story, the wise mentor etc Your stories cast, whether that be a handful of small secondary characters or a full set of royal families and servants to suit are important and their engagement with the main character helps support your mc’s narrative and story. Compatability within your cast helps add life to dying scenes, banter, encouragement, calculated insults and emotive decisions are so much stronger and memorable than a main character with some sweet monologues. Whenever I read a book and the main characters and side characters, interact and remember each other and think about each other before they act???? It’s great and I live for it. In my book every three of the four main cast come from different cultural backgrounds, with differen’t patrons and goals, their differences helps them connect with each other and help my mc grow and establish his worldview and moral beliefs. 

I like to place my main character in a room with every character even if they could never reasonably come into contact and forcing them to have a conversation, will they talk about similar things, will one apologize to the other it helps me identify whether certain characters are too similar or if my main character is terrible and has nothing to add or nothing to say to anyone. 

There are billions of characters out there with varying physical descriptions and personalities and sometimes it can feel impossible for your main character to feel anything but another carbon copy of the usual main voice in your chosen genre. For my fantasy novel I took the time to step back and reflect on my main character and the tropes associated with the genre, young boy, small town, magical abilities, simple features, mentor figure he leaves behind. So I took him and pretended that he in my minds eye had levelled up like he would in a video game to level 20. I dropped the simple features and gave him violet eyes and made violet eyes as common as blue eyes normalizing it within my world but still giving my character a memorable physical description. I was also inspired by a lot of my favourite main characters, specifically Aang from Avatar and slapped a symbolic geometric shape on my mc’s face, an upside down triangle painted with black liquid chalk. It helped clarify his appearance in my mind and hopefully the readers mind. You can create memorability in an array of things simply by deviating from the carbon copy, cookie cutter mold and in order to do that I encourage you to actively look out media and stories no matter how short that feature unique and rarely seen main characters, voices and setting. By diversifying your reading you reduce the risk of seeing a simple pale unexciting cast as a normal background to prose perfected by watching writing tip youtube videos. One of the best ways is to treat your characters like people, humans have disabilities or simple issues, I’m a writer with inflammatory arthritis, vertigo and stunted fine motor skills from a bad birth, people have these issues today and people had those issues throughout history. Here are some other ways...

- Embrace culture, face paint is prevelenant in many cultures and a character that embraces their culture and/or wears it regularly can make them distinctively unique. Interesting clothing, jewellery, hair etc can make characters more recognizable and provide a good point of departure in a scene to explore some characters culture. 

- Make their body unique in ways that can lightly impact them and show them growing to learn ways around it, an extra finger, deafness in one air, a physiological limp, rosacea, port-wine stains and other cosmetic things (I love giving characters who can shapeshift unique details that can subtly give them away like missing fingers, scars and/or birthmarks.

Overall how you decide to go about the construction of your main character and cast and whether you decide to change their designs or personalities is up to you!

Till next time, stay creative

[buddha-in-disguise]

I have so much to unpack from last night's Supergirl episode. Since it ends at 3am UK time, I often tweet a little before I finally fall asleep. But it is now midday, so here goes on further thoughts on it all. I know this is going to be pretty rambling but I hope it makes sense.

First. Up until this half of the season, not only did Supergirl consistently trend in the UK, so did other words associated with it, most notably Kara and Lena.

Since 5B began, the trending has failed to materialise in the UK. The hiatus of two those blocks almost immediately on top of each other hasn't helped, but it is still a salient point.

Now for the rest. I'm not even sure where to start, but I will try my best.

The opening scenes in the bar.

No Nia. No Kelly. Where were they? Nothing was even mentioned. It wouldn't have taken much to have Alex say if Kelly was working, or running late. Anything. Hell, they had Kelly/Dansen and Nia meet up in a bar scenario in 5A. Why suddenly are they not there? They wouldn't necessarily need dialogue (I mean, Kelly has barely had any since Crisis anyway, so what's new?)

Yet in walks William and suddenly Alex is teasing Kara about inviting him. Winn is also there saying, hey it's okay. You barely know the guy, you had a shitty relationship beforehand, but go ahead, date the dude.

We had a prime opportunity for the Danver sisters to do karaoke together. Instead it was with William. At the expense of sister time (so many would’ve loved the sisters singing together).

So much here is wrong for me as a viewer.

If you have a show about female empowerment, yet the lead of that show is having to be told by others that dating a guy she has barely shared any positive moments with, let alone any romantic feelings for beyond a really awkward moment the episode before; that is not empowering a woman.

All too often Supergirl (as the lead in the show) is looking at dating, but not being capable of making her own romantic choices without the interference from others around her.

The only one I can think of who didn't need that was S1 James and to some degree Adam. Kara showed interest, but ultimately made the decisions on her own. Kara also recognised that with Winn, they were better off as friends. Yet S2 began and inexplicably Kara and James had broken up, and the need for Kara to get told to go for it by others began.

Mon-El was extremely problematic. As is William. Both were allowed to lie, to treat women like garbage at times with immunity. Yet here is another double standard. Kara and the Superfriends lied to Lena for 3 years, yet Lena is a bad person for reacting. I will repeat what has been said I don't know how often about Lena's reaction. It isn't without issue in how she is dealing with it. She isn't evil, but she has handled it badly. Her own emotional trauma, that was partly unpacked in 5A helps though explain why she behaved as she has.Yet, Mon-El faced no consequences for his actions. William can be a complete nightmare in how he treated Kara in 5A, but all is suddenly forgotten about or forgiven because of the reset? That is a cop out if ever there was one.

This hypocrisy is what annoys me the most, and frankly it is misogynistic all too often.

I actually pity any woman who believes it is okay for a man to behave as many do towards Kara. The message it sends is awful. I know the men in my family would be horrified by the actions of these love interests. I know of some men watching the show who feel the same way.

As for Lena and Kara. The trauma both have faced has shaped them. Yet Kara appears unaffected by losing her world a second time when Earth 38 was destroyed. On losing Argo. Sure they got it back, but as a changed merged World. You expect us to believe having to watch an antimatter wave destroy those you love has no effect? That being trapped for months with only the other paragons and Lex didn't cause trauma, even with a positive outcome. That seeing Krypton destroyed the first time wasn’t traumatic enough. That’s not something that just goes away. Add in losing Jeremiah, losing Astra (again), the trauma Supergirl must face when she can’t rescue everyone, that has a lifelong impact.

Lena has shown her emotional trauma has also been lifelong, albeit in a different way. To dismiss the emotional abuse Lena has suffered to attack her actions now is pitiful. Winn even suggests to Kara, that in the future, Lena does come through this, and isn't evil personified some want to make her out to be.

Yet Mon-El gets excused, William gets excused. Ugh. I’m sick of the double standard.

So, let’s unpack this further. Kelly Olsen was in the military. She wasn't just trained, but had an active role in the army. She recounted an event at a checkpoint where she was serving in S4. So she had active service, and it was in that moment when Kelly decided she wanted to help others more.

Kelly also knows the stress of keeping an important part of your life secret. She then also fell in love with a woman, someone who was her Sergeant, who was then killed on patrol (another reason we know Kelly was on active duty). It devastated Kelly who hadn't even told James of her relationship.

Later, upon completing her service, Kelly became a psychologist specialising in trauma.

Nia is also someone facing problems. Not only did her becoming Dreamer lead to discord with her sister, as well as the tragic loss of her mother, she has problems with Brainy. Nia offered to be there for Kelly when she was upset over watching Alex get hurt, but we saw nothing to suggest they had a heart to heart. Azie posted something that suggested they filmed a scene that did this, but it never made it on the final edit. Instead, once again we had William taking screen time.

So anyway, the point of all this is: guess who is placed to actively help Lena and/or Kara with the problems?

Kelly. Who apparently doesn't know Kara is Supergirl yet. So while Kara wonders if she should tell William, she could have the exact same conversations with Alex, only substitute Kelly for William. Overall, the plot could easily be maintained, and the established cast get good solid and plausible screen time. She could even talk to Nia about it, yet doesn't.

Another thing I find hard to understand is why haven't they used the link of Kelly, working at Obsidian North, where they could establish the Leviathan link.

If Lex has made the connection to Leviathan, you are telling me, even without Brainy helping them, Alex, Nia, J'onn and Kara haven't made the same connection? C'mon. Two investigative journalists, one who has won the Pulitzer, two DEO trained agents, and if Kelly was brought in, someone military trained; aren't able to make the connections? J'onn has all those computer banks in the tower, and while none of them are Brainy or Winn, he can't use said computing power? Why bother having it, if they are only props in the background. They could even ask Lena to help, since she has shown willingness to work with them if the reasoning was good enough. Leviathan is someone she knows (after all, Lena could have her memories returned by J’onn too). She knows the danger Leviathan poses. She could use the leverage to still get the lens from Obsidian in a similar way to now, but through Kelly if needed.

Actually, if they are using the tower, how does J’onn afford to pay for all this? I can only assume being as old as he is, he made some great investments over time, allowing him to be independently wealthy? But again nothing really suggests this.

Oh as for Alex leaving the DEO, great. After all, she was the Director but hasn’t been able to lead the DEO in all that time. Let alone some of the morally grey areas the DEO skirted around all too often. Still, where will she get her income from? Does she get paid as part of J’onn’s PI firm? Kara barely makes rent and food costs (at least she says her apartment is rent controlled so wouldn’t be able to afford it otherwise), so no way can she afford to help Alex out financially. Kelly might be able to support her, but again I cannot imagine it would be sustainable.

I feel like banging my head against a brick wall.

Onto Nia. I've said this a few times now, but here I go again. Back to William. I get the reason he came along in regards to Russell and so the Andrea connection. That story made sense. What hasn't made sense - William being used as a journalist, when Nia is right there! Nia has barely had any screen time, and virtually none as a journalist; you know - her actual job. I'm not sure what the minutes on screen ratio has been this season between the two, but it has felt completely slanted towards William as a viewer.

Instead of Kara and Nia investigating Leviathan after William was 'exposed' in 5A, now Nia is sidelined again, because they want Kara to team up with William to investigate Lex. Why do they need that journalistic pairing of William and Kara, when Nia - who as a Superhero, is better placed if danger from Lex occurs. But no, they're making it about Kara having to work with William because Lex threatened to kill him. Plus Nia was being mentored by Kara. Is she no longer being mentored by Kara? Are they a team? Even if the mentoring has ended, Nia is still not being utilised as a journalist. As the saying goes, make it make sense!

As for Lex. I love Jon Cryer. I’ve loved his version of Lex, but once again I feel Lena is just as well placed to take on his role in bringing down Leviathan. Why add another villain to this plot? We were told it was Leviathan who were the bad guys for this season, but once again we barely have a glimpse of them, but all the screen time on Lex, also to the detriment of Lena. We could be using this time to begin to mend Lena’s relationships with not only Kara, but the Superfriends. Instead we are getting bit and pieces, that seemingly bear little resemblance to the ‘fight for Lena’s soul’, or the ‘Stronger together, weaker apart’ tag lines the SG team used to market the series in 5A. (See attached photo). So again, this is frustrating for us to watch, as there is absolutely no cohesion to the storytelling. We know it is the ‘nothing is as it seems’ season, but to have no really coherent storylines so far this late on? It is baffling for me.

The sidelining of Nia and Kelly also brings to the fore the way the LGBTQ characters are being treated.

Dansen feels like a long lost legend from the mists of time. As I said earlier, there was a perfect opportunity for a Dansen scene in the opening part of the show, yet we might as well watch tumbleweeds fly past, for all the screen time Dansen or Nia have had. Well, rather haven’t had.

It seems we shouldn't ask for justification as to why William is on the show, but when we say the LGBTQ characters are being sidelined, that it doesn't matter one jot how diverse a cast can be; if said cast are not being given credible storylines or screentime, and if we say as much, we have to continually justify why that is the case. We get told to take what we are given. To insist on better, is oppressing white CIS men (in some cases CIS women have argued the same). This isn't oppressing anyone, but asking that if we get given relationships, given characters we want to invest in, they get the storylines to accomplish that. Supergirl is failing the LGBTQ audience so badly at the moment. So many have the same complaints it is ludicrous to suggest this is just one section of a fandom or trolls.

What I'm taking from all this at the moment is that 20% of the main viewing demographic as per GLAAD figures (and more besides, as I've seen straight viewers recognising the problems as well), have serious concerns with Supergirl.

But keep telling us we are overreacting. Or we should take what we are given. Or that we are delusional. After all, it is the kind of crap we have sprouted at us continually away from Supergirl, why shouldn't it be the case here.

I look at S4, heck even 5A, to what the show is doing now and it feels like an unmitigated disaster. Episodes are running out fast, so even if they increase Dansen, or Nia's screen time, it won't be enough to make up what has been lost. They're running out of time to give us a solid ending that ties up the mess they've created.

I really don’t know where this will end? CW Supergirl - do better. You have some phenomenal actors and actresses in your cast. Do them and your audience justice. Because right now you aren’t at all.

[ataswegianabroad]

Alone Amongst the Gum Trees Part 3 - It Was Murdoch All Along

NOTE - this article has been migrated to Medium. As of 2021, A Taswegian Abroad will be closed down, and all of my writing will be published on my Medium profile.

“For some time, Australia’s democracy has been slowly sliding into disrepair. The nation’s major policy challenges go unaddressed, our economic future is uncertain and political corruption is becoming normalised. We can’t understand the current predicament of our democracy without recognising the central role of Murdoch’s national media monopoly. 

There is no longer a level playing field in Australian politics. We won’t see another progressive government in Canberra until we deal with this cancer in our democracy.”

- Kevin Rudd - THE CASE FOR COURAGE

Foreword

I started this as a brain dump on July 25th, 2016 just before I flew back to Australia for 4 weeks. I decided to wait to finish it as an “Alone Amongst the Gum Trees” piece after the 2016 US election as it would have directly impacted the outcome. 

That was the plan, anyway. I forgot entirely that I had written this draft for almost 5 years. The next thing you know: it’s early 2021, I’m married, have a dog, a car, and my first child is due in August. 

My last political opinion piece was from April 11, 2016: a piece on how Bernie Sanders was being treated in the lead-up to the 2016 presidential election.

So what happened from mid-2016 to early 2021? I didn’t jump back down the political commentary rabbit hole. No more rants on Tumblr blogs. No angry posts on Facebook. The odd spicy tweet about the current election happening between my old home (Australia), my new home (Canada) and the messed up cousin next door (United States). I instead chose to divert my love of writing to sports (see https://thefiftyfooty.com/), technology, and music.

From a political standpoint I chose to mostly stop talking, and to listen. Now don’t become misconstrued: I did not ignore it. I was very active over the Provincial and Federal Canadian elections of 2015 and 2019, I followed the unprecedented US political climate very closely given our proximity to the United States (and learned a lot in the process), and I voted in the most recent 2019 Australian election (my third from Toronto since leaving in 2012).

If I take a step back - I still need to be self-critical: I was defeated and I surrendered to the tidal-wave of the far-right. I was watching the US tear itself in two over race, alternative facts, and radical ideology. I was watching the UK go down a similar path with Brexit and Boris Johnson. I was watching my beloved homeland of Australia continue to confusingly elect damaging conservative governments despite the polls, trends, movements and more indicating it was time for a change.

As I matured into my late 20′s and now early 30′s (*gulp*) I was asking myself: was this how it was going to be? Did the western world just decide “we’re done with progressive views, let stick it in reverse for a bit and see how we go”? If that was true, then why did Canada buck this trend with Trudeau in 2015 & 2019? Why was New Zealand thriving under Arden after 2017 and 2020?

I went to a dark place on this. 

But then something amazing happened. Enter former Australian Prime Minister Kevin Rudd talking about wanting a royal commission into Rupert Murdoch and his News Corp empire who control 70% of print media in Australia.

Did he say 70% of all print media in Australia?

I STRONGLY recommend taking 15 minutes to watch this video. It will do a much better job of painting the scene than I ever could. If not, you can still read on through.

After doing some looking into this: all I can say is that I didn’t have to dig very far to have my fire reignited. All I can think about now is this #MurdochRoyalCommission

My world view has changed, and what I am about to write next will explain a few things that I hope will change yours too.

This is not a left vs right piece. This is not a blame, shame, or complain piece either. I won’t curse or abuse, because this is a self reflection, a cry of encouragement, and a call to action to all who live in and want to protect the political integrity of democracy around the world.

I am here to explain my thought patterns with the goal of having at least one more person under the thumb of Murdoch’s “beast” realise just what’s going on, and to encourage that person to make more informed decisions knowing the facts.

The Path to En-frightened-ment

February 2014 was the last time I updated the long-form political arm of my blog. Back then as a young man exposed to his first bout of political and social disappointment after the 2013 Australian election - I felt the need to get it all out and I did in a little more linguistically brash Part 2 of “Alone Amongst the Gum Trees”.

I was in an interesting position then. I was a 23 year old finding his place in the world - personally, politically, spiritually, environmentally. I was mostly deciding whether or not I was done with Toronto and it if was time to stay home permanently after spending 3 months back in Australia.

I chose no. I left. I came back to Toronto and the rest is history.

Then one day a couple of years later I got us flights back to Australia for a visit. After nearly 3 years avoiding it (mostly because of my post-election distaste for Australian ignorance), it was time to bite the bullet and go home for a bit.

In 2014 I mentioned:

...let’s talk about Australia, how things changed, how it looked from outside the huge wall that the government apparently has built around the country now, and how it looks from a bloke who literally can not wait to leave again.

I had been anxious about that trip for a while. Not because I hadn’t seen everyone for so long or because it was my wife’s (then girlfriend who became my fiance on that trip) first time visiting, it was because Australia had a chance to move away from the “ignorance, inequality, narrow-minded idiocy, and over-conservatism” I mentioned in 2014. 

But we didn’t. Turnbull won the 2016 election. I was so angry at the Australian people. I was so scared of that ignorant, greedy, racist, xenophobic, homophobic, narrow minded, privileged, climate denying creature that seems to be slowly devouring the planet.

From that point in time, all I could think about was some sort of big right-wing populist shift happening across the globe. Outside of the obvious ones: Trump in the USA, Johnson in the UK and Abbott/Turnbull/Morrison in Australia, there were a few more extreme cases: Putin in Russia, Marine Le Pen in France, Viktor Orban in Hungary. Then there’s Cambodia, Brazil, Turkey, Egypt etc who saw this as a huge advantage as well. It may not be the end of a progressive vision of the world but it definitely seemed like the beginning of a big switch.

One thing I learned during my political writing hiatus while serving my self-induced “exile” to Canada is that this country was one of the few blips in this trend. Why did Canada choose to elect Justin Trudeau in 2015, a left wing liberal, after 9 years of Harper’s conservative government? Was it simply because Canadians were good and fair people? Did they just fundamentally understand that you need both conservative and progressive governments to advance society? Perhaps they do, and Canadians are most definitely good and fair people regardless of election results. I am even set to become a Canadian citizen myself (and a dual-citizen overall) in 2021.

So where is this all coming from? Why are the United States, Australia and the United Kingdom on a continued path to segregation, protectionism, populism and division while Canada and New Zealand show basically zero of these tendencies?

The News Corp cancer that is Rupert Murdoch’s media empire is the deciding factor.

So What Does Kevin Rudd Have To Do With It?

Mr. Rudd has been living in the USA for the last 5 years and is firmly spearheading the charge in that Rupert Murdoch’s media behemoth “News Corp” has been unlawfully influencing Australian opinion and undermining elections in Australia, the United Kingdom, and the United States for close to 3 decades (more predominantly in the last 8 years). 

Before you read any further I have to be transparent about my opinions of Kevin Rudd. I accredit his “Kevin 07″ campaign as the catalyst for my interest in politics, my decision to study economics at university, and my ongoing support for progressive policies in every federal and state election since 2007. His work has played a big part in shaping me into the person I am today.

Despite my positive position on Mr. Rudd, I am also disappointed he did not action this during his time as prime minister. However, I am “all in” when it comes to what he is standing for, and that is:

Eradicating monopolies in all forms (be it political, business, journalism, etc)

Improving media literacy to encourage fair and unbiased journalism

Avoiding the pitfalls of Murdoch's divisive influence on the USA happening to Australia

There’s a few key factoids to his claims of mass-media bias:

70% of print media in Australia is owned by ONE MAN: Rupert Murdoch (100% owned in Queensland)

Print media influences the national conversation on a daily basis

Rupert Murdoch owns the biggest YouTube channel in Australia (news.com.au)

The line between fact-based and opinion-based reporting continues to blur, resembling that of CNN (Democrats) and Fox (Republican) extreme partisanship in the USA

All of Murdoch’s papers have backed the Liberal/National party in all 19 out of the last 19 federal and state elections 

The ABC is breaching the Australian Broadcasting Act of 1983 by not standing up to Murdoch media purely out of fear

Politicians are not standing up out of fear of character assassination

Whether or not Murdoch is backing left or right, Labor or Liberal, the question still remains:

Do you think it is healthy for a FOREIGN PRIVATE ENTITY to own a monopoly level of influence on a sovereign country’s political system for that private entity to use for their own personal gain through targeted media attacks and character assassinations? 

Watch This Space...

There are utter mountains of evidence to accompany these claims, and to make sure you can digest what I am trying to say, I recommend that you sink your teeth into the following videos to validate and truly comprehend the size of the tumour we are dealing with:

Feb 20, 2020 - 1h - Friendlyjordies informal interview with Kevin Rudd

This is right before the Covid outbreak in March, which delayed Mr. Rudd’s ability to move for a formal commission into media bias

Provides excellent insight into the ABC’s lack of action, the opportunism of the Green party, and the complete absence of unbiased reporting in Australia

Feb 18, 2021 - 1h 30m - Kevin Rudd Officially Requesting Royal Commission to Australian Senate

The first 20-30 minutes provide Mr. Rudd’s summary of the situation

The remainder of the video consists of questions from both Labor and Liberal senators about Mr. Rudd’s claims

Mar 1, 2021 - 2m - Kevin Rudd speaks to Sunrise about the Murdoch monopoly

Mr. Rudd went on a national flagship morning show to discuss his concerns regarding News Corp

LISTEN to the questions being asked of him: completely disregarding his valid points and dismissing him as “sour grapes”

Channel 7 is not News Corp, so why try to discredit Mr. Rudd? Fear of being targeted by News Corp

Mar 9, 2021 - 1h - National Press Club: The Case for Courage

Mr. Rudd stands up in front of The National Press Club of Australia to promote the four big challenges facing Australia in his upcoming book “The Case for Courage” 

He takes questions from journalists from both Murdoch and non-Murdoch media outlets

As I start to conclude this piece, for action to happen, an independent royal commission is required to get to the facts. Mr. Rudd already gathered over 500,000 signatures that were recently sent to Prime Minister Scott Morrison asking for the royal commission to take place, but this is not enough.

Even former Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull, a friend of Rupert Murdoch and political opposite to Mr. Rudd, signed the petition and said the following:

Mr Turnbull, a former Liberal prime minister, said the Murdoch media used to be a group of traditional right-leaning outlets but has now become "a vehicle of propaganda."

He told ABC television's Insiders program on Sunday that Australian democracy was suffering for allowing the "crazy, bitter partisanship" of social media to creep into the mainstream.

"We have to work out what price we're paying, as a society, for the hyper-partisanship of the media," Mr Turnbull said.

"Look at the United States and the terrible, divided state of affairs that they're in, exacerbated, as Kevin was saying, by Fox News and other right-wing media."

I recently sent a (somewhat long) letter to Mr. Rudd expressing my concern for the state of Australia’s media landscape, with it culminating in the following questions:

I am deeply moved and inspired by your bravery to take on "the beast" as you so aptly name it, and I want to boldly ask: how can I help? How can I get involved? 

I am yet to hear back from Mr. Rudd himself - but I think if you’ve gotten this far, you know what I am about to say next.

I want to help, learn more, or get involved.

That’s amazing. We’re not asking for money, just action. Here’s some ways you can help is stop the rot:

SUBSCRIBE TO and FOLLOW direct updates from Kevin Rudd:

Website / Newsletters

https://newsroyalcommission.com/ 

https://kevinrudd.com/

Social media alongside the #MurdochRoyalCommission hashtag on all platforms:

Twitter

Instagram

Facebook

YouTube

Boycott News Corp media sites, publications, and channels

I’ve linked a list of all assets by News Corp above

This includes steering clear of ALL mediums of news owned by these publications and outlets including the respective:

Social media channels and pages

Television and radio news channels 

Print and online newspapers and articles

SHARE and spread the word of this cancer affecting our democracy

Talk TO your friends and family (not AT them) and LISTEN to their views - people are not dumb: this will make sense if given time to digest

WATCH the videos posted above as a start, alongside a few more recommendations:

This interview between Friendly Jordies and former Labor Leader Bill Shorten from earlier in March 2021

I learned more about Bill Shorten in the last 20 minutes of this interview than I did in his entire run as opposition leader. 

This just goes to show you how utterly mistreated he was by Murdoch media

For a laugh - every episode of Kevin Rudd: PM from Rove McManus’ late night show

I want Australia to remain a safe, secure, and lucky country to raise my family in someday. I care about this very much and plan to ramp up my content around this until we are free from the Murdoch beast and its lies.

Thank you so much for reading, as always, I am happy to discuss.

List of Murdoch (News Corp) Owned Outlets [Expanded Below]

Television

Foxtel (65%)

Australian News Channel

Fox Sports Australia

Streamotion

Fox Sports News

Fox Cricket

Fox Footy

Fox League

Kayo Sports

Binge

Sky News Australia

Sky News Weather

Sky News Extra

Sky After Dark

Australia Channel (News Streaming channel)

Sky News New Zealand

Sky News on WIN

Internet

Punters.com.au — Australian horse racing and bookmaker affiliate.

SuperCoach

Australia Best Recipes

hipages

odds.com.au

Mogo

One Big Switch

Knewz, a news aggregator

Realestate.com.au

Advertising, Branding & Tech

Global

Storyful

News UK

bridge studio

wireless Group

wireless studios

urban media

First Radio

Switchdigital

TIBUS

ZESTY

News Corp Australia

SUDDENLY - Content Agency

Medium Rare Content Agency

HT&E (Here, There & Everywhere)

News Xtend

Radio

News UK & Ireland

wireless Group

talkSPORT

talkSPORT 2

talkRADIO

Virgin Radio

FM104

Q102

96FM

c103

Live 95FM

LMFM

U105

Scottish Sun 80s

Scottish Sun Hits

Scottish Sun Greatest Hits

Times Radio

Magazines and Inserts (digital and print)

News Corp Australia

Big League

body+soul

Broncos

Business Daily

delicious

Escape

Foxtel

GQ Australia

Hit

Kidspot

Mansion Australia

Motoring

Sportsman

Super Food Ideas

taste.com.au

The Deal

The Weekend Australian Magazine

Vogue Australia

Vogue Living

Whimn

Wish

News & Magazines (digital and print)

News UK

The Sun

The Times

The Sunday Times

Press Association (part owned, News UK is one of 26 shareholders)

The TLS (Times Literary Supplement)

News Corp Australia

The Australian including weekly insert magazine The Deal and monthly insert magazine (wish)

The Weekend Australian

Australian Associated Press

news.com.au

New South Wales

The Daily Telegraph

The Sunday Telegraph including insert magazine sundaymagazine

Victoria

Herald Sun

Sunday Herald Sun including insert magazine sundaymagazine

Lions Raw

Samizdat

Queensland

The Courier-Mail including weekly insert magazine QWeekend

The Sunday Mail

Brisbane News

South Australia

The Advertiser including the monthly insert The Adelaide magazine

Sunday Mail

Tasmania

The Mercury

The Sunday Tasmanian

Northern Territory

Northern Territory News

Sunday Territorian

Community suburban newspapers

Cumberland/Courier (NSW) newspapers

Blacktown Advocate

Canterbury-Bankstown Express

Central

Central Coast Express Advocate

Fairfield Advance

Hills Shire Times

Hornsby and Upper North Shore Advocate

Inner West Courier

Liverpool Leader

Macarthur Chronicle

Mt Druitt-St Marys Standard

NINETOFIVE

North Shore Times

Northern District Times

NORTHSIDE

Parramatta Advertiser

Penrith Press

Rouse Hill Times

Southern Courier

The Manly Daily

The Mosman Daily

Village Voice Balmain

Wentworth Courier

Leader (Vic) newspapers

Bayside Leader

Berwick/Pakenham Cardinia Leader

Brimbank Leader

Caulfield Glen Eira/Port Philip Leader

Cranbourne Leader

Dandenong/Springvale Dandenong Leader

Diamond Valley Leader

Frankston Standard/Hastings Leader

Free Press Leader

Heidelberg Leader

Hobsons Bay Leader

Hume Leader

Knox Leader

Lilydale & Yarra Valley Leader

Manningham Leader

Maribyrnong Leader

Maroondah Leader

Melbourne Leader

Melton/Moorabool Leader

Moonee Valley Leader

Moorabbin Kingston/Moorabbin Glen Eira Leader

Mordialloc Chelsea Leader

Moreland Leader

Mornington Peninsula Leader

Northcote Leader

Preston Leader

Progress Leader

Stonnington Leader

Sunbury/Macedon Ranges Leader

Waverley/Oakleigh Monash Leader

Whitehorse Leader

Whittlesea Leader

Wyndham Leader

Quest (QLD) newspapers

Albert & Logan News (Fri)

Albert & Logan News (Wed)

Caboolture Shire Herald

Caloundra Journal

City News

City North News

City South News

Ipswich News

Logan West Leader

Maroochy Journal

North-West News

Northern Times

Northside Chronicle

Pine Rivers Press/North Lakes Times

Redcliffe and Bayside Herald

South-East Advertiser

South-West News/Springfield News

Southern Star

The Noosa Journal

weekender

Westside News

Wynnum Herald

Weekender Essential Sunshine Coast

Messenger (SA) newspapers

Adelaide Matters

City Messenger

City North Messenger

East Torrens Messenger

Eastern Courier Messenger

Guardian Messenger

Hills & Valley Messenger

Leader Messenger

News Review Messenger

Portside Messenger

Southern Times Messenger

Weekly Times Messenger

Community (WA) newspapers

(50.1%) (Formerly)

Advocate

Canning Times

Comment News

Eastern Reporter

Fremantle-Cockburn Gazette

Guardian Express

Hills-Avon Valley Gazette

Joondalup-Wanneroo Times

Mandurah Coastal / Pinjarra Murray Times

Melville Times

Midland-Kalamunda Reporter

North Coast Times

Southern Gazette

Stirling Times

Weekend-Kwinana Courier

Weekender

Western Suburbs Weekly

Sun (NT) newspapers

Darwin Sun

Litchfield Sun

Palmerston Sun

Regional and rural newspapers

New South Wales

Tweed Sun

Tweed Daily News

Victoria

Echo

Geelong Advertiser

GeelongNEWS

The Weekly Times

Queensland

Bowen Independent

Burdekin Advocate

Cairns Sun

Gold Coast Bulletin

Gold Coast Sun

Herbert River Express

Home Hill Observer

Innisfail Advocate

Northern Miner

Port Douglas & Mossman Gazette

Tablelander – Atherton

Tablelands Advertiser

The Cairns Post

The Noosa News

The Sunshine Coast Daily

Townsville Bulletin

Toowoomba Chronicle

Townsville Sun

weekender

Daily Mercury (Mackay)

Tasmania

Derwent Valley Gazette

Tasmanian Country

Northern Territory

Centralian Advocate

International

Papua New Guinea

Papua New Guinea Post-Courier (63%)

United States

New York Post

Wall Street Journal

realtor.com

Move (80%)

Dow Jones & Company

Consumer Media Group

The Wall Street Journal – the leading US financial newspaper

Wall Street Journal Europe closed

The Wall Street Journal Asia closed

Barron's – weekly financial markets magazine

Marketwatch – financial news and information website

Financial News

Heat Street - news and opinion website

Mansion Global - global luxury property website

Enterprise Media Group

Dow Jones Newswires – global, real-time news and information provider.

Factiva – provides business news and information together with content delivery tools and services.

Dow Jones Indexes – stock market indexes and indicators, including the Dow Jones Industrial Average. (10% ownership)

Dow Jones Financial Information Services – produces databases, electronic media, newsletters, conferences, directories, and other information services on specialised markets and industry sectors.

Betten Financial News – leading Dutch language financial and economic news service.

Strategic Alliances

STOXX (33%) – joint venture with Deutsche Boerse and SWG Group for the development and distribution of Dow Jones STOXX indices.

Wireless Group

Talksport

TalkRadio

Books

HarperCollins

4th Estate

Collins

Ecco Press

Harlequin Enterprises

Harper Perennial

Harper Voyager

Kappa Books

Modern Publishing

Unisystems Inc.

Zondervan Publishing

Christian publishing company taken over by HarperCollins in 1988

Inspirio – religious gift production

[suitvan13]

Fat Freezing Center In Kings Hillside

Does Coolsculpting Work In The Past As Well As After, Coolsculpting Fat

Content

Target Persistent Locations Of Fat.

What Results Can I Get Out Of Coolsculpting?

Why Pick Clatuu Fat Freezeing?

Ultimately there can be approximately a 25% decrease in fat in a particular area. The most noticeable outcomes of the fat freezing procedure show up 1 month after the therapy, the whole process of fat elimination last until 3 months after the treatment. Julie aids our people by taking tray impacts for tooth lightening, blood samples for testing and also treatments for skin restoration.

Over the following weeks the fat cells breaks down and also gotten rid of from the body totally. Following Lipoglaze/Cryolipolysis therapy the fat cells die as well as are gotten rid of from the body using the natural removal process. Over the following 2-12 weeks after treatment the fat cells break down and inch loss results can be observed. The cooling modern technology is so efficient since fat cells often tend to be abundant in saturated fatty acids, indicating they are delicate to the cold. Various other cells, such as skin tissue, capillary and also the nerves are not so sensitive to cold and also continue to be entirely untouched. Scientists additionally performed their very own professional tests through the Institute of Asthetic Medication in Glasgow. The outcomes revealed Lipoglaze ™ to be secure with normal results of 33% fat removal and also an astonishing 59% fat decrease attained in some tests.

Target Persistent Locations Of Fat.

For your chin as well as neck area, one treatment might suffice however up to 3 therapies might be called for, depending on your body and the outcomes you're looking for. During la-lipo.uk’s accounting software , it will certainly be made a decision the amount of therapies will be needed for this location. Several individuals select CoolSculpting for their chin in order to decrease the appearance of a dual chin.

https://la-lipo.uk/radlett/ ">

What actually works weight loss?

Here are 26 weight loss tips that are actually evidence-based.Drink Water, Especially Before Meals. Eat Eggs For Breakfast. Drink Coffee (Preferably Black) Drink Green Tea. Try Intermittent Fasting. Take a Glucomannan Supplement. Cut Back on Added Sugar. Eat Less Refined Carbs. More items•

The final disclose was truthfully extraordinary, I was not anticipating such amazing results. One thing that really stood apart was Dr Sach's enthusiasm of what he does - he was virtually as excited as I was.

What Results Can I Get Out Of Coolsculpting?

Download our FREE brochure to uncover just how our therapies can minimize persistent fat and make you look wonderful from every angle. Our specialists are dedicated to assisting you reach your private body objectives. If you have an inquiry concerning our therapies or would such as help to customize a prepare for the areas you 'd like to treat, after that publication a totally free appointment with our friendly group. The excellent customer is someone aiming to target and also reduce details areas of fat that are difficult to lose with diet regimen as well as exercise.

During the complimentary assessment our professionals will review your objectives as well as establish whether CoolSculpting is the appropriate procedure for you. Normally talking, if you can grab it, we can treat it with CoolSculpting.

Later on, over some tea and also a little cake, we had a conversation as well as we saw the in the past and after photos. Also, it's fantastic to assume that later on in the day, just two hours after my therapy, I was being in a conference and also no one recognized. They simply maintained claiming I looked great later on in the workplace (what can you state yet thank you?). CoolSculpting is made for those that have unwanted fat that resists diet and also workout.

Your chin can be one of the last locations to shed fat throughout a weight management programme as well as makes it a popular area for therapy. At Wellness & Visual appeal, we provide DualSculpting which means that two applicators can be applied at the exact same time. This is particularly useful if greater than one area is being treated or for locations such as the arms and saddlebags where 2 therapies are called for. During a first assessment, we will certainly discuss the location you would like to target as well as the outcomes you 'd like to attain. Each patient is various so we will take the amount of fat, your current shape and also your case history into account when making a decision the number of CoolSculpting treatments or sessions may be needed. The CoolSculpting treatment can be performed on many different areas of the body. If you're already near your optimal weight, it's possible that a person CoolSculpting session will work.

A small location of fat can be lowered sufficient to show a visible distinction after the very first treatment. We are available for clinical therapies, online consultations, recommendations and skin care products. CoolSculpting is preferred with both males and females; if you're close to your perfect body weight however have a particular amount of subcutaneous fat-- the fat that you can squeeze! For curvier clients that are dedicated to reaching a certain weight, CoolSculpting can help attain the body shape they prefer. Well they're in fact very comparable, yet polar revers at the same time. They both work by killing off fat cells, which your body naturally gets rid of using the lymphatic system and liver and also ultimately out in your pee.

The majority of clients locate it a comfy treatment and also make use of the moment while being dealt with to read magazines, listen to music or watch your favorite programme on Netflix. As soon as the fat cells are frozen and eliminated from your system, those cells are permanently gotten rid of. The fat cells that are destroyed will certainly not come back on the very same area treated, nevertheless there are other smaller sized fat cells on the location that could increase the size of if you place on more weight. Lipoglaze/Cryolipolysis is medically proven as an efficient alternative for those wanting to stay clear of the greater cost, pain, threats, as well as recovery time connected with surgical procedures as well as laser therapies. The best prospects are those who intend to minimize persistent fat on particular locations of the body and also whom are not normally over weight. It is necessary to consume alcohol a lot of water to clear out the crystallised lipids in the fat cells.

I was suggested to this place by a good friend that couldnt talk a lot more highly of Dr Sach and also his method. The ability of the physician was REALLY impressive, I felt I remained in secure hands and also was exceptionally kicked back, which I really did not expect.

Cryolipolysis, also described fat freezing is a non-invasive choice to liposuction that entails the localised application of a low temperature tool to damage down and also ruin stubborn fat cells.

After the death of the apoptotic fat cells, the cells decay gradually due to the gradual dissolution of lipids.

Structures such as skin tissue, capillary, as well as our nerve system are not as conscious freezing as well as are for that reason completely untouched by the treatment.

These dead cells are after that carried by the lymphatic system, refined and also gotten rid of by the body.

Fat cells are extra at risk to cold temperatures and freeze at reduced temperatures compared to various other cells.

When fat cells are exposed to a specific cooling between -1 ° C and -5 ° C they go through crystallisation, this process creates an inflammatory response which creates the fat cell to diminish and after that pass away.

[lifesbecomings]

The email

Hi Drew— I just wanted to  clarify something and share some perspective. First off, I want to say that I understand and respect Denison’s admissions process. I reached out a few days ago to everyone just curious about the process and wanted to talk about options to continue my education, IF even possible, through Denison! With the positive feedback from everyone and your first email, and then mention, even as a slight possibility, of spring enrollment...one certainly can understand my excitement and push for more discussion and my initiative to get applied/enrolled. With that said I am still curious about steps in general. And maybe I applied as the wrong type of student.  I know there are openings still this spring, and especially in the EDUC classes (like EDUC 390), and thought "wow, maybe this is all aligning because it's meant to be."  If it is or isn't meant to be, I'm at peace with whatever the decision is or remains. But Denison will always be my first choice. I did leave in 2017 as a medical leave student, and technically I wasn't pursuing a degree through CCS, just taking classes, many students take summer classes or semesters (like if on academic suspension), and then come back and return to campus. I know usually students typically return 1-2 years, and I understand there are deadlines and I know their importance. In no way shape or form am I trying to surpass these. When I first reached out, I said I'd be happy to discuss ANY options in a return.  Others, throughout the thread, were mentioning a spring return and spring availability and how fantastic this could be. Both Karen Graves and Baker were on board in the Educ. department, where I am majoring, presumably for a spring enrollment.  Maybe it is the fact I only have art credits as transfers. Was it that they were hoping for more core class transfers? Either way, to be perfectly transparent, whatever the outcome is, I will be taking spring classes. As well as summer classes. I want to get my degree. My first choice is Denison. If there is anyway to make this a possibility still. You already know, It would be my pleasure to stay in touch, and I will happily move to Ohio and take classes back on campus in the fall. Denison holds a special place in my heart. I hope my time on campus impacted those I came into contact with, as much as they impacted me. The Briefing: Within the last 2 weeks. Literally, two weeks, a series of events occurred that made me see the potential I could have. It started with a ski lesson, we had philosophy lessons up the chairlift, and the technical skiing lessons going down the hill. It was eye opening. I realized I need to work on my patience, but It also made me realize that I don't have to do something I do not enjoy. Moreover, it made me recognize I need to stop running from what satisfies me the most, people, education, learning, and teaching. I shut myself off in 2017 to the idea of "traditional schooling". I thought, "It's not for me". " I'm not good at it".  It stuck.  That is, until January 6th 2021, when I had this ski lesson. The ski lesson in combination with my parents friend, a teacher from Brother Rice High School,  got me thinking. I was thinking and analyzing myself. My change in perspective was shocking. I needed to accept my talents and embrace them, instead of shutting them out and rejecting them. It is so funny how we sabotage ourselves.  This is the start of my story. About how I found my drive and fulfillment. Below are three personal stories I would like to share. 1.  Monkey Bars. 

There is a story my mother always would tell me growing up about my perseverance and determination. When I was very young, 4 years old, there was a set of monkey bars on the school playground. After school one day I told my mom I wanted to go across the monkey bars. The only problem...I did not know how to do them. But, I had watched other kids that day at recess. So I was determined to figure it out. We were there for 2-3 hours. I was bound and determined to do those monkey bars. I knew that was what I wanted. I had numerous failed attempts, failure after failure, my mother began to beg me to leave with her because my hands were all beaten up, blistered, and bloodied, I still kept going. I made it all the way across those monkey bars that day, and every day after. There is another story, too, a similar story about me riding a two wheeler. Same determination, different goal. Both accomplished. 

2. My Miracle.

A senior in college, to the modern western world, is still considered "young". If you're in school, attending high school or even attending university, to have a child anywhere, at any time in that mix, It is looked down upon, plain and simple.  I chose to not tell any of my peers, while I was at Denison, my fall semester, that senior year, in 2017. I kept this knowing to myself. I told my parents, and told the father/ fathers parents. Guess what was encouraged? An abortion. Whether verbally spoken (which it was) or unspoken, I knew this is what was wanted from me, wanted for me. I mean, it was, after all, the easiest thing to do. I could still finish my degree and the family could always come later in my life. So, I did just that. I went in for that appointment, at 5 weeks. 

Statistically speaking it is 99% effective. Did you know, 1:4 women will have had an abortion in their lifetime. It's neither here nor there, just an incredible statistic. I actually came back to Denison to finish out my degree after. Putting the past behind me. I enjoyed a fantastic fall break that year in Philadelphia with friends, because through Denison my Junior year, I did a "study abroad," in Philadelphia (the best experience ever. Cannot speak enough about that program! So grateful Denison is a part of the Study in Philly!) 

Anyway, after coming back from break I wasn't myself that week at school. I came home, went to a doctor's appointment. Pregnant. I was 11 weeks pregnant. 1-2 weeks away from being in my second trimester. I knew. In that instant, I was keeping him. No one else understood, at the time, my decision. I was blamed on one side, entirely, for this outcome, the father still lives in denial. This is important information in my story, as it describes where I have been, who I am and who I've become. The father isn't, and has never been involved. This is fine. It's been uncomplicated. I'm actually very lucky. Besides, I know that my son and I deserve someone 100% interested in me AND my son, not an either or situation. So once making my decision, to continue with the pregnancy, I took one day. One day to be broken hearted, to feel like it was me against the world. Later, to my surprise, I found I had a support network bigger than I could ever have imagined.

I am blessed. I am loved. "We" are so loved. But it took me that one day to realize, the easiest thing is not always the right thing. I knew honestly from the day I first found out, I wanted this baby. And my god, has it not only blessed me, but this child of mine blesses and brings joy to anyone and everyone he meets. As a biased mother would say, he truly is something special. My choosing to bring this new life into the world, is an amazing and miraculous testimony to my dedication and character. Being a mother (parent) is one of the toughest jobs in the world. 

3. My Bakery.

First, back story: I tried to take some classes at College for Creative studies in 2018. Knowing I was more than "just a mom". I've done a lot of "soul" searching and self love in my time away. I didn't reach back to Denison at this time because I was convinced traditionally schooling just must not be for me. The root of it, I later would find, was that I was somehow undeserving of it. (super messed up mental ideal). Disclaimer: I, like many, struggled with self worth. Therapy is necessary and beautiful.  Anyway, continuing---I had a hobby of sketching.  Homes and houses always intrigued me, so I picked up some classes at CCS, interior design classes. This is where I realized a hobby does not make for a career. More importantly, I remembered the promise I had made to myself, that I didn't want anyone else raising my baby boy.  I was spending 60hrs + a week on projects and classroom time, leaving him home with my parents and babysitters, a little bit at first, then, more and more. So, I pulled the plug. 

When I give of myself I want to give 100%. If I was giving my school work 100% there was none left for my son. I had to pick between the two, and clearly, without a doubt, my baby boy was the sure pick. Schooling this time round failed because It was in person, he was not in school yet, and it was not practical or logistical. I stopped in OCT of 2019. Between October and December of 2019 I went stir crazy. I was 24/7 with my son, living at my parents home still, and my mental health was on the decline. I felt trapped. I needed a way out. And thus "A Degree Above Bakery" was born. I have made over 5,000 dollars in profits from this business. I have a standing order, weekly, with Westborn Market. However, this flow, and work is at my grace.  I can shut it down, permanently, or temporarily. I can drive it forward more, or scale it back, starting tomorrow.  I was determined to find a way out and give myself some "me" time, as well as doing something I enjoyed that gave me flexible hours to work with my son present. I originally started in my own home. Operating under the cottage food law. That is, until I started to rent space in Plymouth MI from Westborn Market in April 2020.  I bake Sundays currently. 

I created and established then registered my name. I created and bought a web domain.  I have my own labels and packaging I created. Every aspect of my business I have built and created. The brand, the marketing, getting into a grocery store. My point here, being, when I think of something, I do everything in my power to try to reach my goal, whatever the road block. When I get an idea, I see it through. To the best of my ability. __________ My overarching theme is determination. You will have nothing without it. I will be respectful and understanding of any final decisions, acceptance, reinstatement, or lack thereof. If there is still a slimmer of possibility to qualify for spring semester at Denison or be considered again... It would be an honor and mean more to me than any words could begin to describe. I had to take one last shot with you all,  before seeking another institution.  Rules and regulations will be forever. I understand this, but If there is anything I can do to help enhance my application/reinstatement/case/enrollment/scenario please don't hesitate to ask. I would be honored to commit to in person class on the hill in the fall, after taking summer classes, and taking the spring classes online at Denison, I also will be able to pay, in full, for the spring tuition as well as on campus next fall/winter. I also paid in full while being on campus every year from 2013-2016. Please also hear me when I say, yes, obviously I would do whatever and help to see a successful spring enrollment, but I would be happy to transfer credits from this spring (elsewhere), and summer, to complete classes on campus in the fall.  I will stay open minded to all possibilities, as I know Denison does! 

With much respect and appreciation, and excitement,

Sarah McNaughton

[writing-prompts-for-friends]

Notes on Robert McKee’s “Story” 25: The Four Things You Need for a Perfect Scene

In this chapter we are going to look at all the essential pieces that go into designing a scene and how they impact it. I recommend that you revisit my notes on “the gap” because it will be discussed heavily. Get ready for a long but INCREDIBLY important post about all the little parts that go into writing great scenes that culminate in a great story.

I’d also like to preface this by stating that when I first read this chapter, I thought to myself, “There’s no way in hell I could live up to these expectations and write a story in which every scene ticks all of these boxes” and I felt really downhearted. 

But then I remembered, That’s why I’m here reading this book, taking these notes. And maybe that’s why you’re reading this post, because you’re like me and feel that your writing has room for improvement and/or you want to learn more about how storytelling works. 

Don’t read this post and think, “Oh my God, every single one of my scenes has to have all of these things happening or it’s worthless.” That would be the entirely wrong way to use this post. Instead, think of these parts of the scene coming together as one brilliant, glinting golden statue of The Perfect Scene that’s sitting up on a pedestal. Not all of your scenes have to be this flawless. Maybe not all of them can be. 

Instead, I advise you use the below information when you have written a scene and something about it seems “off” to you, but you can’t put your finger on what it is. Take a look at these four essential parts of the scene and ask yourself: “Does this problem scene have all of them? Is it missing something?” If it’s missing at least one, rethink the scene and work it in. Already this has proven eye-opening for me and several of my works where I’ve been stuck.

I think that this has turned out to be the most helpful section out of the entire book so far.

1. Turning Points

“A scene is a story in miniature--an action through conflict in a unity or continuity of time and space that turns the value-charged condition of a character’s life. No matter locations or length, a scene is unified around desire, action, conflict, and change.”

In every scene, a character is pursuing a desire related to their immediate time and place. This immediate desire (Scene-Desire) should be an aspect of the Super-Objective, the story-long quest that spans from Inciting Incident to Story Climax. In other words, you don’t want to have a scene in which the character is pursuing something that has nothing to do with the main plot. 

Within the scene, the character acts on their Scene Objective by choosing under pressure to take one action or another. However, from any or all levels of conflict comes a reaction they didn’t anticipate. The effect is to crack open the gap between expectation and result, turning their outer fortunes, inner life, or both from positive to negative or the opposite in therms of values the audience understands are at risk. 

Example: 

Let’s say the story is a crime novel in which a serial killer is behind bars and a copycat is suspected of being on the loose. Our protagonist the detective must put a stop to this. 

The Super-Objective: to identify and stop the copycat killer as soon as possible

In this particular scene, the detective who arrested the original serial killer must go question him to learn whether the copycat is in leagues with the serial killer. 

His Scene-Objective: to learn whether the copycat is in leagues with the serial killer.

The detective steels himself. He knows that it will be difficult to face this man again, even if he is chained to his chair in the safe interrogation room within the prison. The criminal is more beast than man, and the detective nearly lost his sanity and life putting him behind bars. He knows the serial killer is manipulative and knows the most cutting things to elicit the emotions he wants out of his victims. The detective refuses to be swayed by this.

Choice: Steel himself and face his old nemesis, or have someone else do it.

Expected Outcome: The detective, having steeled himself sufficiently, will not be swayed by the killer’s cunning words and will obtain the information he needs.

Actual Outcome (Gap): Before entering the interrogation room, he takes a look through the small glass window in the door and sees the killer staring right back at him with the same flinty eyes and bone-chilling grin he wore when he killed the detective’s partner all those years ago. The detective has a PTSD flashback and backs away from the interrogation room, unable to go inside. He is escorted away, and now there is doubt over whether he can handle this case.

Conflict: Inner, Personal (He is fighting against his own mind and emotions.)

A scene causes change in a minor, albeit significant way. A Sequence Climax is a scene that causes a moderate reversal--change with more impact than a scene. An Act Climax is a scene that causes a major reversal--change with greater impact than Sequence Climax. 

“Accordingly, we never write a scene that’s merely a flat, static display of exposition; rather we strive for this ideal: to create a story design in which every scene is a minor, moderate, or major Turning Point.”

There are four main effects of Turning Points:

Surprise (”I thought the detective could handle the interrogation!”)

Increased Curiosity (”What exactly did the serial killer do to his partner?”)

Insight (”The detective always seemed kind of aloof until now. This case and the loss of his partner made him become a cold person scared to let people close.”)

New Direction (Now the higher-ups are questioning their decision in choosing our detective to head this case and are thinking of taking him off it.)

The Question of Self-Expression

...Okay. I want to be professional and summarize this in my own words, but McKee has written it so damn well I can’t water it down or reword it, so here is this section its entirety. I think it’s very important for all writers.

“The storyteller leads us into expectation, makes us think we understand, then cracks open reality, creating surprise and curiosity, sending us back through his story again and again. On each trip back, we gain deeper and deeper insight into the natures of his characters and their world--a sudden awareness of the ineffable truths that lie hidden beneath the film’s images. He then takes his story in a new direction in an ever-escalating progression of such moments.

To tell a story is to make a promise: If you give me your concentration, I’ll give you surprise followed by the pleasure of discovering life, its pains and joys, at levels and in directions you have never imagined. And most important, this must be done with such seeming ease and naturalness that we lead the audience to these discoveries as if spontaneously. The effect of a beautifully turned moment is that filmgoers experience a rush of knowledge as if they did it for themselves. In a sense they did. Insight is the audience’s reward for paying attention, and a beautifully designed story delivers this pleasure scene after scene after scene. 

Yet, if we were to ask writers how they express themselves, more often than not they’ll reply: “With my words. My descriptions of the world and the dialogue I create for my characters. I’m a writer. I express myself in language.” But language is merely our text. First, last, and always, self expression occurs in the flood of insight that pours out of a Turning Point. Here the writer opens his arms to the world, saying: “This is my vision of life, of the nature of the human beings that inhabit my world. This is what I think happens to people in these circumstances for these reasons. My ideas, my emotions. Me.” Our most power means of self-expression is the unique way we turn the story.

Then come words. We apply our literary talent with vividness and skill, so that when a beautifully written scene is acted, the audience is carried willingly and pleasurably through our Turning Points. As important as language is, however, it’s only the surface by which we capture the reader to lead him to the inner life of the story. Language is a tool for self-expression and must never become a decorative end of its own. 

Imagine now the difficulties of designing a story so that thirty, forty, fifty times over, scenes turn into minor, moderate, or major ways, each expressing an aspect of our vision. This is why weak storytelling resorts to substituting information for insight. Why many writers choose to explain their meanings out of the mouths of their characters, or worse, in voice-over narration. Such writing is always inadequate. It forces characters to a phony, self-conscious knowledge rarely found in actuality. More important, even exquisite, perceptive prose cannot substitute for the global insight that floods the mind when we match our life experiences against an artist’s well-placed setup.”

2. Setups/Payoffs

“To express our vision scene by scene we crack open the surface of our fictional reality and send  the audience back to gain insight. These insights, therefore, must be shaped into Setups and Payoffs.”

To Set Up: To layer in knowledge

To Pay Off: To close the gap by delivering that knowledge to the audience

A setup is a little nugget of information or a seemingly small event that, come payoff (or the big reveal/plot twist), takes on a bigger an deeper meaning. 

Take THE EMPIRE STRIKES BACK for example. When Darth Vader reveals that he’s Luke’s father, we rush back to the scenes in which Ben Kenobi and Yoda are greatly troubled over Luke’s command of the Force, fearing, we presume, for the young man’s safety. We now realize that Luke’s mentors were actually concerned for his soul, dreading that his father would seduce him to the “dark side.”

Setups are delicate in nature. Be too subtle about them and they will fly under the radar. Beat the audience over the head with them and they’ll see the payoff a mile in advance. Keep your target audience in mind, creating more and bigger set ups for youth audiences, and more subtle ones for middle-aged audiences. 

“Turning Points fail when we overprepare the obvious and underprepare the unusual.”

3. Emotional Transitions

This was a pretty enlightening section. I don’t think I’ve thought this hard about emotion since I took a class on Buddhist Philosophy back in uni. How do we move our audience? How do we make them laugh or cry or become outraged? 

“We render the precise experience necessary to cause emotion, then take the audience through that experience. Turning Points not only deliver insight, they create the dynamics of emotion.”

In order to create emotion within our audience, we first have to understand that there are only TWO emotions that can be broken down into variations: pleasure and pain.

Pleasure

Joy, love, happiness, rapture, fun, ecstasy, thrill, bliss, etc.

Pain

Anguish, dread, anxiety, terror, grief, humiliation, malaise, misery, stress, remorse, etc.

The audience experiences these emotions when the telling takes us through a transition of values. However, in order for the audience to feel these emotions the following criteria must be met:

We must empathize with the character

We must know what the character wants and want the character to have it

We must understand the values at state in the character’s life

Basically, we aren’t going to feel sad if some henchman gets offed, but we will feel sad if the protagonist we’ve rooted for and grown to love becomes unable to achieve his desire. 

As McKee spoke of in previous sections about the importance of alternating the positive/negative charge throughout the telling of the story, it is important to alternate between shades of pleasure and pain, because the Law of Diminishing Returns applies to story as much as it does real life.

Law of Diminishing Returns

“The more often we experience something, the less effect it has.”

When you have a slice of pie, it’s the best thing ever. The second slice isn’t too bad. The third and you might hurl. 

“The first time we experience an emotion or sensation it has its full effect. If we try to repeat this experience immediately, it has half or less than half of its full effect. If we go straight to the same emotion for the third time, it not only doesn’t have the original effect, it delivers the opposite effect. The repetition of “serious” emotion is, in fact, a favorite comic device.”

I think maybe this is why I’ve always had a hard time getting into most angst fanfictions. First off, I’m an emotional sponge soaking up everything on the pages, and I don’t like to feel sad. Secondly, I think there are a lot of angst fics that are just non-stop pain and it gets old for me. 

McKee points out that there is one exception when a story can go from positive to positive or negative to negative and successfully elicit an emotional reaction from the audience. If the contract between these events is so great, in retrospect the first takes on shades of its opposite.

Example: A couple argues and breaks up (negative). Next, one kills the other (DEFINITELY negative). The second turn is so powerful that it makes their break up seem almost positive in retrospect. “At least they were still talking then.”

Once a transition of value creates an emotion, feeling comes into play. However, “emotion” and “feeling” are not the same thing. 

Emotion is a short-term experience that peaks and burns rapidly.

Feeling (also known as “mood” in film) is a long-term, pervasive, sentient background that colors whole days, weeks, even years of our lives. It can even dye a personality. 

Depending on the feeling that dyes the character, scene, or story, the emotions evoked can change. If a man is feeling good about life and his career and relationship are going well, but then his lover dies, he’ll grieve and recover and go on with life. But if, on the other hand, he is already dark, stressed, and depressed and then his wife dies...the story may take an even darker turn.

“The arc of the scene, sequence, or act determines the basic emotion. Mood makes it specific. But mood will not substitute for emotion. When we want mood experiences, we go to concerts or museums. When we want meaningful emotional experience, we go to the storyteller. It odes the writer no good to write an exposition-filled scene in which nothing changes, then set it in a garden at a sundown, thinking that a golden mood will carry the day. Undramatized exposition is boring in any light.”

4. The Nature of Choice

“An original work poses choices between unique but irreconcilable desires: It may be between two persons, a person and a lifestyle, two lifestyles, two ideals, two aspects of the innermost self--between any conflicting desires at any level of conflict, real or imagined, the writer my devise. But the principle is universal: Choice must not be doubt but dilemma, not between right/wrong or good/evil, but between either positive desires or negative desires of equal weight and value.”

I think in this age of prolific superhero films, a lot of creators feel the need to frame their story in “good vs. evil” or “right or wrong.”

Human nature dictates that each of us will always choose the “good” or the “right” as we perceive the “good” or the “right” one-hundred percent of the time. Therefore, a choice between “good and evil” or between “right and wrong” is not an actual choice.

However, each person’s perception of what is right or wrong is different. A thief knows that society views stealing as “wrong.” However, if he is stealing food in order to feed his family, in his own eyes, he is doing the “right” thing to keep his family fed. 

“True choice is dilemma. It occurs in two situations. First, a choice between irreconcilable goods: From the character’s view two things are desirable, he wants both, but circumstances are forcing him to choose only one. Second, a choice between the lesser of two evils: From the character’s view two things are undesirable, he wants neither, but circumstances are forcing him to choose one. How a character chooses in a true dilemma is a powerful expression of his humanity and of the world in which he lives.”

To construct and create genuine choice, we must frame a three-sided situation. 

“As in life, meaningful decisions are triangular. The moment we add “C” between “A” and “B,” we generate ample material to avoid repetition. Now there are three possible relationships between A and B: positive/negative/neutral, love/hate/indifference, for example. And we add the same line between A and C and B and C. This gives us nine possibilities. Then we may join A and B against C; A and C against B; B and C against A. Or put them all in love or all in hate or all indifferent. By adding a third corner, the triangle breeds over twenty variations, more than enough material to progress without repetition.

What’s more, triangular design brings closure. If a telling is two-sided so that A vacillates between B and no-B, the ending is open. But if choice is three-sided so that A is caught between B and C. A’s choice of one or the other closes the ending with satisfaction. Whether B and C represent the lesser of two evils or irreconcilable goods, the protagonist can’t have both. A price must be paid. One must be risked or lost to gain the other. If, for example, A relinquishes C to have B, the audience feels a true choice has been taken. C has been sacrificed, and this irreversible change ends the story.”

There’s a lot to be digested here. But basically, what McKee is saying is that a choice between yes/no, good/evil, right/wrong, he loves me/he loves me not is boring and inconclusive. If during the whole story the character vacillates between loving and not loving a man, if the story ends up with them breaking up again, the audience will just think, “They’ll just end up getting back together again at some point.” 

But if you add in a third variable, a price to be paid, something to be gained and lost with the final choice, there is an interesting story. 

In Summary

I know this was a LOT of information to take in at once. But remember the four key elements that create a beautiful scene:

Turning Points

Setups/Payoffs

Emotional Transitions

The Nature of Choice

If you have a problem scene that just doesn’t feel right, that feels flat, take a look and check whether it has all of these four aspects within it. And never give up.

Source: McKee, Robert. Story: Substance, Structure, Style, and the Principles of Screenwriting. York: Methuen, 1998. Print

[hideyoshineki]

True and Deserved

So basically I wrote my own V After Ending

Pairing: Jihyun Kim (V)/MC

Word Count: 1414 words

Summary: 

After Jihyun returns from his two years away, he and MC's relationship develops, and Jihyun experiences what it is like to be in a truly healthy and loving romantic relationship. 

Read on AO3!

- 

Once Jihyun returned knowing more of himself, he could now properly get to know MC. To really know her.

Not that he had any doubts as to how genuine and special the relationship between himself and MC was. It was just that what they had gone through together had made the progression of learning about each other different to that of normal couples, so he didn’t quite know what to expect when he returned two years later. He had no idea how their relationship would be in a normal, day-to-day life.

He found he didn’t have to worry. The more time he spent with MC, the more the relationship showed itself as being the one he both wanted and needed, providing him with more happiness than he ever imagined he could possibly have, more than he ever thought he deserved.

MC had been genuine during their first eleven days that started it all, and she remained so as their relationship developed. Back then, Jihyun had seen her kindness, her empathy, and her drive to help people, and he continued to see those traits within MC every single day.  

He also came to know the other aspects of MC he hadn’t gotten the chance to see before. He would see her quirky sense of humour, one that could even match Saeyoung’s, which he would often find making him laugh. He would discover that she was a dog person rather than a cat person, although she would never say so in front of Jumin. He would learn about her family and her childhood experiences, her life before they had met, her likes and her dislikes. He would become familiar with her strengths, her weaknesses, and her flaws.

While the core of MC he had initially fallen for was the same, the new things he would learn about her, big or small, only made him fall in love with her even more.

Being with MC also made Jihyun realise how much had been missing in his past relationships. He hadn’t been aware of what a healthy romantic relationship truly meant until he was with MC.

He almost didn’t know what to do when he was being treated as someone precious, rather than the other way around. MC treated him with care that he didn’t recall ever having received before. He felt safe and loved with her.

MC listened to him and never judged him. She made him feel like he was able to be say what he wanted to say or be emotionally vulnerable and not be criticised for it. Jihyun never felt tested when he was with MC, never needed to second guess reasons for her actions or doubt her words.

She also made him feel treasured physically. MC cared over whether Jihyun was eating enough or was getting proper rest whenever he got so passionate over working on a new painting that he would forget to do so. When the two of them were at home, sitting or lying together, she would often hold him and make him feel so comfortable that sometimes he would fall asleep in her arms. When they had been at their most physically intimate for the first time, she focused all her attention on him, appreciating everything about him, including giving special attention to the scar on his torso from two years ago by kissing it tenderly.

Jihyun had grown to love himself in the past two years, but it still touched him deeply to experience such love from someone else.

While Jihyun and MC had their strong relationship that brought out the best of each other, they could stand as their own people. They didn’t rely on proving themselves or their worth to each other.

Jihyun, after his absence finding himself, was finally allowing himself to paint without feeling like he should hold back. He painted for himself. He did hope his art could be beautiful enough to be appreciated by others as well of course, but it was not his primary motivation. His main drive was for that of his own satisfaction, to do what he was born to do and express the ideas he had in his artistic mind.

MC still took her role within what was now known as the VFA seriously, and was becoming better and better at it with every party that was held. She grew into her skills of negotiating with party guests, and her organisation only kept increasing in efficiency and effectiveness, resulting in even more successful parties than there had been before.

It had been Yoosung’s idea to change the name of the RFA, and after some hesitation, Jihyun had agreed with him. Rika was no longer a part of the association, and was now very far away in both distance and participation. The association had changed since then, so much so that it felt like something different now. He also knew the name change was something MC appreciated, but never would have asked for. If Rika’s name was to be removed from the Association’s title, it would have to be from the people who were most involved with Rika and had been part of the association the longest.

Rika…

Both Jihyun and MC knew that her impact upon him could never be gone completely.

When Jihyun had returned, he and MC had sat in his home and had a conversation about her. He had wanted to have it as soon as possible, considering how much of an elephant in the room she was, and he didn’t want to run away anymore.

“What happened to Rika while I was gone?” he had asked.

MC saw the seriousness in his eyes, and didn’t even try to soften anything in her response. Jihyun wanted the clear answer, and so she would give it. “She was sentenced to imprisonment,” she spoke solemnly. “She’s going to be placed into rehabilitation programs and extensive therapy to help her as much as possible throughout, and afterwards she won’t be permitted contact with any association members, Saeran, or any of those who were in Mint Eye.”

“I see…”

It was as much as Jihyun could’ve hoped for. For the sake of all the suffering she caused, the lives that had been so damaged from her, and the scale of her severe actions, such a decision was necessary for justice for all her victims. Perhaps afterwards, Rika could finally be on the road to her own healing.

In all honesty, he hoped she would be. Despite all she had done, Jihyun couldn’t bring himself to wish any further despair on her than she already had. If she could live the rest of her life after her sentence doing good things, then that would be the best outcome for everyone. He didn’t need to forgive what she had done in order to hope she would one day have a happier, more fulfilling future.

“MC, I…” he said. “I know… that it brings up a lot of negative feelings for you when Rika is mentioned, and after what you- no, we- went through with her, that’s completely understandable.” He sighed and looked downwards as he spoke. “But nevertheless, she was a part of my life for so long. A part of who I am today has been shaped by that time with her. As much as I heal and as far away as she goes, I cannot fully remove that from my past and myself. It’s not something we can entirely move on and forget about.”

MC leaned forward, gently placing a hand on the side of Jihyun’s face and bringing his head up to look at her. “I know,” she said. “I could never ask you to do anything of the sort. That was a huge part of your life that affected you, and I would never expect you to erase that. I am here for you and all parts of you.”

Jihyun reached up to place his hand against MC’s. He would never cease to feel blessed by MC’s warmth and understanding. “Thank you,” he said so quietly it was almost a whisper. He intertwined his fingers with MC’s as he slowly leaned in to kiss her.

Jihyun had his regrets and many mistakes from the past, but would he actually go back and change them if he had the chance? Considering where he was now, happier than he had ever been and with MC, if changing his past meant changing anything in the present, then he probably wouldn’t.