#lantern batfam

[glitter-stained]

More Star Sapphire Jason from the batfam lantern AU because you gotta feed the hounds:

Jason: *makes a gun construt*

Jason: *makes a shotgun construct*

Jason: *makes a machine gun construct*

Jason: Okay, fine. I understand the appeal.

*****

Jason: *passive aggressively drops a detailed rendition of the Joker's severed head as a construct at Bruce's feet.*

Bruce: And who exactly is fueling your emotion to maintain such a complex construct?

Jason: It's called self-love.

Bruce: Now see, that I will not believe.

****

Jason plays Go Fetch with Dog using construct balls and sticks as practice. It works great, because Jason loves Dog.

***

Jason: hey Kyle, you don't have to look at them like that, you know I don't have tasers there in that uniform right? I really tried, but the space magic won't let me incorporate most of my Red Hood suit features into it.

Kyle, who definitely was staring at Jason's uniform's boob window : What? I wasn't looking, why would I be looking- wait, your other uniform has tasers where?

*****

Jason: *tries his best to make a flamethrower construct, cannot construct the necessary chemical reaction*

Jason: *tries to make a construct of a book he has been wanting to read but hasn't gotten to yet, the pages are blank.*

Jason: *tries to construct himself a cup of tea and drink it, fails.*

Jason: *tries to construct an actual living breathing cat. Obviously fails.*

Jason: I think God hates me.

*****

Jason, beating Bruce up with a baseball bat construct made out of his love for him: So, my relationship with my dad is going great-

_____

Alternate Lantern Lore explained in this post:

[jesterraconteuse]

Hal Jordan finding out about Nightwing: YOU. You have a *kid*?

Batman: well... Technically he's my oldest and age of majority... But he's still my kid.

Hal Jordan: OLDEST? YOU HAVE MORE? 2? 3?

Batman visibly annoyed:... 6... Legally.

Hal Jordan: I'm going home. This has single handedly killed my willpower for a week, I need to process this.

Later....

Superman: Ah so you finally found out. I'm proud of him honestly, good to see he's willing to bond with others again.

Hal Jordan: You knew?

Superman: ...His kids basically call me Uncle Supes. I've babysat. I was around when he still just had Nightwing

WW: They're so cute! Children of such strength and bravery. Not to mention his dog, his cat, his cow... His son has animals even I've never seen before!

Hal Jordan: I've had enough.

And Hal hasn't even learned about his crime fighting cousin, batwing, Oracle, bluebird, Spoiler, and of course Jarro.

Note: everyone knows Supes is a father, he's the dad to talk your ear off about it but he's too nice with too much country charm for anyone to say anything about it. WW and Martian Manhunter are the only ones who listen absolutely intently.

[fakeicecubes]

Reasons why the rest of the JL believes Batman and all of his children are metas/cryptids

-Weirdly good instincts

-They only see the bat and kids at night

-Hasn’t died

-If they have died, they came back within the year

-The JL has seen all of them at one point or another stay up for 96 hours straight and act semi-normally

-One time Batman was stabbed and started bleeding green(it was slime Bruce packed for kids to play with if they were at a crime scene)

-Red Robin didn’t cry while watching A Dogs Purpose for Young Justice’s movie night(he did, the mask hid his tears)

-They all know an absurd amount of Golf facts

-Somehow none of them age

-All of them are friends with a super

Wonder Women has the list and they update it after every mission.

[ditzybat]

steph: why did duke just deck green lantern in the middle of the street, in civvies?

tim: they have beef

steph: cool, ten bucks says duke wins

jason: twenty says this becomes a meme 'random highschooler beats the shit out of justice league member' and hal wont show his face in gotham again

tim: forty, bruce will buy him a car for humiliating hal out of gotham

[batfamhastwitter]

Part 44! Fun fact, I actually am a natural ginger, but I have been able to gaslight a specific few people into thinking that I'm blonde and just dye it. They've thought that for at least two years at this point. I want to see how long it can go lmao

Prev ~ Beginning ~ Next

[superbat-love]

Batman may claim to have no powers, but Green Lantern knows better. He’s convinced that Batman’s cape is sentient.

Green Lantern has observed it on quiet nights in the Watchtower, when Batman thinks no one’s paying attention. He releases control over his cape, letting it unravel and float menacingly around him in different directions. It moves on its own, sweeping across nearby surfaces, carelessly knocking over items.

There’s one thing Green Lantern knows for sure—Batman’s cape has a sweet tooth. Every time Batman passes the candy bowl, it’s mysteriously emptied.

Even stranger, it seems to influence other capes. Once, while Batman was talking to Superman, their capes briefly touched, and Green Lantern saw Superman’s cape come to life—swirling and fluttering as though it had a mind of its own. Superman, unfazed, didn’t even react to the way their capes were flapping erratically around them. Green Lantern was relieved he didn’t have a cape.

He told the others about his theory, but they were skeptical at first. They eyed Batman’s cape with suspicion as he was distracted by a mission briefing with Wonder Woman. But even the Flash had to admit Green Lantern might be onto something when Batman’s cape swiped their feet out from under them, sending them both tumbling to the floor.

Martian Manhunter nodded sagely and agreed on its intelligence, having felt the minds of four little beings flitting around underneath Batman’s cape. Maybe one day they’d feel comfortable enough to run underneath his cape too.

[appleziel]

My favorite obscure DC trivia lore is that Dick Grayson was a candidate for the Green Lantern corp in a comic issue from way back. Because think of the comedy potential. “Night Lantern” is the only GL Batman likes. Hal Jordan gets shit all the time from Batman, but Night Lantern swoops in cheerfully like “where do you need me” during crisis #515273826 and Batman works with him just fine. Even Bruce himself doesn’t understand it.

And, like, people confuse Dick with Kyle all the time. So sometimes they just go with it and pretend to be each other just to keep the joke running.

Maybe I should draw Jason Todd star sapphire edition

[demonicsuffrage]

At the justice league watchtower

Batman, pouring coffee into his cup listlessly, looking more depressed than usual:

Hal: What's up with him? He's been like that all morning

Clark, whispering: Robin left on a mission with the titans

Hal, in a deliberately loud stage whisper: So Bat's got empty nest syndrome, huh?

Bruce:

Hal: Get it? Empty nest, because he's a bird-

Bruce, taking out the Bat-green-lantern repellant:

[incorrectbatfam]

Teen Titans first meeting except they independently get in trouble and are put in timeout in the same room at the Watchtower, Breakfast Club style

[ciricearts]

more prompts!!

[file808]

I have a head cannon that non of the batboys favorite superhero is batman, but they don't know that he isn't Tim and Damians favorite.

---‐----------------------------------------------------

Jason or the most loyal Wonder Woman fan: Dick I can't believe that you're a Superman fan

Dick an superman fan: Hey at least I'm better than him. *Points to Damian*

Damian: Tt I'll have you know that I'm an avid fan of Black Canary. Father is not my favorite hero unlike somebody. *Glares at Tim*

Tim: You know that Batman's not my favorite hero right?

Dick genuinely shocked: WAIT WHAT!?!?

Jason: Yah Tim, Damian makes sense but you??? You have been such a Batman fan sense the beginning.

Tim: Like a year after becoming Robin Batman stopped being my favorite. Why is this such a surprise?

Damian: So Drake who's your favorite now?

Tim: Green Lantern!

Dick: Which one? There's a whole Corp of them.

Tim: ...

Jason: Tim...which one??

Tim:*Sigh* Hal Jordan.

Bruce in the distance: REALLY HAL JORDAN?!!!?!!

[glitter-stained]

Jaykyle enemies to lovers misunderstanding AU where they hatefuck once during Countdown to Final Crisis and part ways. Jason becomes Star Sapphire from a different mechanism than usual just because he's so powered by love, and forgets to mention it to just about everyone but Carol. Cue a very confused Kyle being accosted by a bunch of curious/angry bats and/or outlaws who think the reason why Jason's struggling with his power (his magic keeps exploding in his face) is because Kyle broke his heart. (It's not, Jason just needs to learn about self-love). Upon learning that, Kyle goes through three different crises in ten minutes and decides that while he still doesn't like Jason he has to "take responsibility" and "make this right" because he thinks Jason loved him and was being defensive of Kyle's hostility and he used and ditched him, so he decides to help Jason with his powers and resolve the situation. Eventually this is what they needed to give eachother a chance and they fall in love, but god does Jason laughs his ass off when he finally learns about the misunderstanding.

[theaceofarrows]

The Justice League meeting Jason for the first time

Robin Jason: Come on, you egg sucking piece of gutter trash! You like pushing people around who are smaller than you? Well, I'm smaller. Try pushing me!

Lex Luthor: What did you just call me?! Egg sucking-

Robin Jason: [launches all 4ft of his feral self at Lex]

Superman: Uhh, should we help him?

Batman: [shakes his head]

[Jason running circles around Lex while mocking him]

Wonder Woman: Are you certain we shouldn't assist him?

Nightwing: Nah, don't worry he's fine. He just has a case of crime fighting zoomies to work out

[Jason, knocks Lex down after throwing as many smokebombs and batarangs as he can]

Jason: Learn your place you Mr. Clean looking B-lister lump of trash!

Everyone other than Batman and Nightwing: ...

Green Lantern: I really like this little dude! Let's keep him!

[freefallintothevoid]

Whenever Bruce can't do something as Batman he sends one of his kids in the cowl. Literally any of his kids. To deal with having to wear the cowl, they turn it into a game: will the justice league notice that Batman isn't the person under the mask?

Spoiler alert, they don't.

Somehow, the league never notices when it's not Bruce under the cowl, or at least that it's not the same person they all know.

Like never.

______

Hal: Hey Bats, you look taller today.

Jason, determined not to lose: hm

Hal, sensing danger and immediately backtracking: uh, that's not to say you don't usually look tall, I mean you just look taller today, um did you change your ear thingies?

Jason: *Batglare intensifies*

Hal: uh, I'm just gonna go

_______

Aquaman: you've been quiet this whole meeting, Batman, even for you.

Cass, currently wearing shoulder pads and absolutely insane platform boots: *a fim huff of breath*

Aquaman: right sorry, I forgot you were dealing with another mass break out from Arkham this week, you don't need to stay for the whole meeting. We know you probably know everything already anyway

Cass: *nods*

_____

Flash: Morning Batman. *zooms past*

Duke, absolutely befuddled:

Duke, quietly into his comm: you'd think the speedster would have the time to notice

The several batkids on the other side of the line: *laughing hysterically.*

Dick, wheezing: just do the thing where B tucks the lower half of his face into his cape like he's Dracula. You're doing great.

Bruce, from somewhere in the cave, actively giving up on the assumption that his coworkers have at least one working braincell between them: stop comparing me to Dracula, Dick

[mikeluciraphgabe]

I never really wanted the heroes to be in this but I thought this time it would be funny. You may or may not see them again idk yet

Part 6 master-post

[tiredofsatansbullshit]

Another chapter of my "The Waynes on Twitter" work on AO3

Masterlist of Tweets

43 - *chuckling awkwardly* uh what

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