#i tried writing some fic myself
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I can't remember if I followed you for the Destiel content or the Dragon Age content. Cullrian in the year of our lord 2023 made me do a double-take so hard I got whiplash.
Well I was a Dragon Age blogger first, then Mass Effect, then Destiel for the loooongest time (season 8 to season 16!). So really, it kinda depends on how long ago it was, but I'm glad you're here for both! lol
I wasn't really into Inquisition, unfortunately, but I always adored Dorian. I went back to play the series again last year at this time, and decided to try romancing Cullen, and experience his romance finally. Over the years I'd seen lots of my DA friends shipping Dorian and Cullen and I always nodded and said "nice" as I scrolled past it. But something about experiencing Cullen's romance made it click in my head, and I started reading fic, and I fucking buried myself in it. I blazed through all the fic, and I'm out, otherwise you'd see even MORE Cullrian blogging in 2023 π
Anyway, got any fic recs? lol
#ltleramblings#reply#alleiradayne#i tried writing some fic myself#but i'm still suffering massive writing burnout#so i didn't get anywhere :(
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holding it the right way makes his hand hurtβ¦
#hua cheng#heaven official's blessing#tgcf#xie lian#hualian#tgcf fanart#mxtx#mxtx tgcf#hes so whiny#my natural art style is more realistic so i tried to make this more stylized and i cant tell if it worked#im going to draw him more seriously and full color at Some Point#i love when xie lian is giving him writing lessons in fics#i eat that shit up#side note i learned how to properly hold a chinese calligraphy brush and iβve practiced myself to imitate the different stroke styles#and it is Very Hard#and it makes your arms sore#i dont blame hua cheng my handwriting is worse than his
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Can't believe I thought I was almost ready to start posting this GamKar winter soldier pastiche like two years ago on halloween it's grown by several hundred pages and 100,000+ words since then. Current count is 325 pages, 167,000 words, 15 chapters. fukkin UNIT of a fic
EDIT for my own personal satisfaction:
10/25: 167,000
10/29: 174,700
10/31: 180,460
11/7: 185,775
11/18: 189,500
#How is it possible to write so much and yet still somehow have so much left to write >8I#And I still need to do some edit rereads when I'm done...... make sure I've gotten a beta read or two.... do illustrations...........#I suppose I should have known it would take exponentially longer than I thought after all I started writing this in#uhhhhhhh college. it's been a while in the making!!!!!!!! But also PLEASSEEEEEE i just want to POST ugh PLEASE QoQ#you open the door that says WRITING ROOM and just see me beating Gamzee with a big stick while Karkat tries to kill me with his teeth#I am glad I held off on just like starting to post and assuming I could finish the fic before I caught up with myself#I always assume I can and will and that is the devil talking U_U#that way lies frustration and months of hiatus
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FIC: BEFORE THE ENDING, A DANCE the quarry | travis/laura | work-in-progress | pacific rim AU
The day after the kaiju attack on Anchorage, Laura Kearney has her first drift compatibility trial with her partner. It doesnβt go well.
Seven years after the apocalypse begins, Laura Kearney enlists in the Jaeger Academy on Kodiak Island. There, she meets Travis Hackett, her instructor and a retired Jaeger ranger. To achieve her dream of piloting a Jaeger, Laura must find a drift-compatible partner. It's just not as easy as she thinks.
#travis x laura#hackearney#travis hackett#laura kearney#the quarry#hackearney fanfiction#my writing#i am so sorry this is not an update of bite the hand buuut i have an almost fully drafted fic instead#that will definitely by finished by the end of the year?? honestly i'm hoping i finish these last couple chapters in a couple weeks#i've got some runway for at least a few regular updates until then#also sorry about the blurry cap for siobhan i tried my bestttt#i told myself i would never write anything but canonverse AUs for the quarry (unless it was for a request) and now well. here i am.#first cap from seaquest; second from pacrim; third from tracker#sometimes i make things
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TD World Tour AU, where Noah doesn't tell Owen that Alejandro is an eel in London... In Area 51, Noah is accidentally splashed with an alien truth potion (which wears off after a few days) and he talks to Owen... Owen asks Noah what he truly thinks about Alejandro, and Truth-Potion Affected Noah says this: "I have mixed feelings for Alejandro. He's a brilliant, interesting guy and I like him, but I don't trust him. He's like a slippery eel dipped in grease, swimming in motor oil. Basically, Heather with social skills. Wait a minute, why am I telling you this?!"... What if Alejandro secretly heard Noah call him all those conflicting things + Alejandro also learns that Noah is affected with an alien truth potion? π½
Alright, you got me. I'm an absolute sucker for truth potion plots, especially when the character(s) effected by them are usually either pathological liars or incredibly secretive- of which Noah absolutely falls into the second category, given he shares so little personal information.
I'll gloss over why Noah declined to shit-talk Alejandro in London (though there's so many ways this change in behaviour could be justified) since the focal point of this hypothetical centred around their time in Nevada, so let's start from the beginning of the Area 51 challenge.
Area 51:
Before we start, it'll have to be established that no one was eliminated in London. Let's say that the majority vote went towards Duncan (team CIRRRRH voted him out immediately because they found his re-admission to the competition unfair, I guess. I imagine he'd also vote himself, if not as a plan to escape the competition he'd been actively skiving from, then just as an act of spite) but Chris instead claimed it was a rewards challenge- much like he does in Greece- because he doesn't want to let Duncan slip away again so soon.
I see no reason to alter the first part of the challenge- the sneaking into Area 51 portion- since team CIRRRRH's course of entry is fairly straightforward. Noah's presence doesn't make much of a difference to how it would play out; the majority of them throw their rocks and run, Owen gets lasered over the fence and Owen-napped, ect ect.
When both teams have managed to make their way into the Black Box Warehouse, Noah immediately suggests they should prioritise rescuing Owen. Tyler's quick to agree, since he's a firm believer in the "no man left behind" mentality (and he probably makes a not-so-subtle jab towards Noah for his chance of tune compared to London, where both he and Owen did leave Tyler behind) leaving Duncan and Alejandro to split from the group- Duncan in search of Gwen, and Alejandro just takes the opportunity to finally be free from his 'incompetent teammates' and prioritises finding an artifact.
Noah and Tyler come across the contraption Owen's trapped in, Tyler punches it in a futile effort to break it open, and the face hugger cube drops into Noah's hands. This is where the point of divergence comes into play; Tyler has his E.T. moment with one of the face huggers, but Noah- who's a tad bit more observant than Alejandro, and used to dodging surprise attacks from his various older siblings (and Izzy)- anticipates his own face hugger attack and promptly starts a game of cat-and-mouse with a taser alien hot on his heels.
The commotion of which attracts the rest of his team. Alejandro and Duncan arrive on the scene to see Tyler being electrocuted by an alien and Noah running in circles evading another.
Duncan attempts to rip the face hugger from Tyler's face, finding success at the cost of sending Tyler trampling into Owen's captive contraption (essentially taking Alejandro's canonical place in this scene) and inadvertently freeing Owen.
Meanwhile, Alejandro swipes up the nearest box he can find and snags the alien chasing Noah, who's still very loudly panicking as he flees, and succeeds! The alien is swiftly captured into the box, netting team CIRRRRH their artifact, and Noah promptly goes careening into the nearest tower of junk in his face hugger-fuelled hysteria. This causes another box to topple from the peak of the tower, landing directly on Noah's head and spilling its contents onto the bookworm- glass vials filled with a mysterious, luminescent cobalt blue liquid shatter into pieces drenching Noah in whatever they contained. (i.e. truth potion.)
Owen has his false-amnesia moment, characterised by his Joker makeover, and Alejandro enacts his revenge post-hypnotic suggestion after being addressed as "Al" one too many times.
Noah, understandably, swiftly objects to Owen's treatment and demands that Alejandro snap him out of it. Alejandro concedes, and Owen's brought back to himself. At least, for a moment, before the fatigue of having his mind messed with sends Owen into near-catatonia (the same as canon), meaning he has to be ferried through the Warehouse and back to the Jet by Alejandro and Duncan.
Things carry on canonically from there; Noah's just sort of there for the most part, though there'd be a minor hint to his newfound proclivity for honesty. Something along the lines of him giving an uncharacteristically honest answer to Owen as to who he's voting- Tyler, of course, since he was the one who ultimately threw the challenge for them... and also because Tyler still holds some resentment towards Noah for what happened in London, and Noah feels guilty about it every time he looks at the jock. Wait, why did he say that?
Sometime between this and the elimination scene, Noah wipes the truth-goop off of himself, but not before the effects have already started.
Tyler's voted out, yada yada yada.
The Jet:
Thus begins the start of "Picnic at Hanging Dork". Team CIRRRRH, consisting of just Alejandro, Duncan, Owen and Noah, are slumming it up in the Economy Cabin. Alejandro tries to rally his team by asking how to break apart Courtney and Heather's tentative co-operation. Owen suggests having Alejandro seduce Heather, since it worked for both Bridgette and Leshawna. Duncan makes his "Babe Olympics" comment. Noah pipes up that playing with someone's feelings is pretty scummy, even for someone competing for a million dollars.
Alejandro takes Noah's reluctance towards his methodology poorly; he hadn't spoken up before, when Alejandro had utilized the same strategy against other girls- and even Owen noticed that, so surely Noah did too- so why was he to outwardly against him using the same tricks? Duncan agrees, and offers ''his'' idea of having Alejandro flirt with Courtney to throw both her and Heather off their games (since Heather has an obvious crush on Alejandro), and things follow canon.
Then, the scene between Alejandro and Courtney happens. Noah scoffs at the display from the side lines, prompting Owen to ask him why he's so against Alejandro's plan.
"I mean, you never said anything before, when he flirted with Bridgette and Leshawna." Owen comments, light-hearted in nature but with an underlying questioning tone.
Noah's eyes flicker with a cobalt glow, easily mistaken for a trick of the light, and he speaks without even thinking.
"Yeah, because I was trying to give him the benefit of the doubt. Bridgette was happenstance, and Leshawna's whole deal could've been a coincidence, or some massive misunderstanding. But this?" Noah extends an accusing hand out towards a smug looking Alejandro, then pans it over to a flattered Courtney, "He's outright toying with Courtney's feelings after she was cheated on in front of an international audience. It's scummy."
Owen nods in understanding, momentary contemplation evident in the pouted curve of his lips, and he chimes in.
"Does that mean you don't like Al?"
"I never said that."
"Well, how do you feel about him, then?"
Again, a flash of blue light against the hickory backdrop of Noah's eyes, and he responds thoughtlessly.
"I guess I have mixed feelings about him. On the one hand, he's slippery, like an eel dipped in grease, swimming in motor oil. He's like if you took all of the worst aspects of Heather, wrapped them up in a pretty package, and gave them social skills..." He holds his hands out before him in a scale-like manner, with the left tipped downwards and tie right raised by his chin. Then, the two hands swap positions.
"And on the other hand, he's brilliant. I've never met anyone as talented as Alejandro; he's smart, he's athletic, he's funny. It's almost unfair just how perfect everything about him is- even his face is perfect. It's ridiculous! Infuriating, even. It's so hard to dislike him, even when I know he's bad news, but that doesn't mean I trust him."
Owen stands slack jawed beside his best friend, both impressed and stunned at the raw honesty of Noah's tirade. Noah, now a little more aware of himself, realises that he's said more than he intended to- more than he thinks he's ever spoken in one go throughout the entirety of Total Drama. He's not usually one for speeches, after all, let alone honest ones.
He's always been the type to play his cards close to his chest, so why...?
"I, uh, didn't mean to go off like that."
And he also didn't mean to admit it, either. What was going on?
The look Owen gives him is, in a word, vivid. The blonde has a shit-eating grin stretching across his face, a sort of elated smugness practically glowing from his features.
"Sounds like someone has a cruuuush!~"
What? No? No! Not at all, where would Owen even get that idea?!
Noah splutters to correct Owen's assumption (to disastrous results, because he does sort-of has a crush on Alejandro, so the truth potion doesn't allow him to outright deny it), and in his preoccupied state he misses how a calculating pair of sage green eyes never seems to stray from him.
Alejandro has a lot to think about in regards to a certain cynic, it seems.
#I'd like to apologise for taking this idea and running with it.#Cutting myself off here before I breach 2k+ words or else I'll be here all day.#Sort of entered actual Writing Mode at the end there instead of Outline Mode but this idea is. So Full Of Potential I couldn't help myself.#But from here it'd basically be Alejandro using his newfound knowledge of Noah's crush on him to his advantage.#Whilst Noah's doing his best (and failing) to deny that he has any feelings for Alejandro.#Eventually leading to the two of them having a Bonding Moment where Alejandro gets Noah to divulge some personal information.#And in turn- or an effort to garner some trust (to be abused later)- Alejandro also lets himself be vulnerable towards Noah.#Something something Alejandro tries to use Noah as a pawn but ends up catching feelings of his own.#Then of course the potion wears off and Noah goes back to being just as prickly and standoffish as he was before.#A point of conflict maybe? Imagine bearing your soul out to someone only for them to close themself off to you not even days afterwards.#...Also imagine being practically forced to divulge information about yourself to someone you don't trust because of a truth potion.#Oh yeah. That's some good angst material right there.#Especially is you have Alejandro be- if not fully aware- than at least suspect that Noah's not being agreeable on his own terms.#Anon why have you given me The Thoughts?? I can't keep brainstorming AUs when I already have fics to work on!!#ophe's ranting in the tags again#total drama#td noah#td alejandro#team chris is really really really really hot#alenoah#-ish#silly ideas#other's ideas#long post#replies#kinda drafty in here (posts from the drafts)
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Fandom: Tekken
Relationship: Kazama Jun/Mishima Kazuya
Rating: Explicit (this one has sexy times so not for kiddos)
THIS IS POST TEKKEN 8. BIG TEKKEN 8 SPOILERS. DON'T READ IT WITHOUT FINISHING THE GAME UNLESS YOU DON'T CARE ABOUT SPOILERS.
Additional Tags: Reunion, Reunion sex, Vaginal Sex, Vaginal Fingering, Awkward Conversations About Not-So-Accidentally Trying to Murder Your Son and Actually Murdering Your Dad and Kind of Accidentally Abandoning Your Unknown Baby-Mama, Forgiveness, Getting Back Together, Dealing with the mental fallout of Tekken 2 to Tekken 8, which for both of them is...a lot, but they're getting there
"I am not the man you want me to be," Kazuya admits. "But that does not mean the man I am does not love you."
"...Still?" Jun asks, the word the only thing that can quite get out of her throat.
#tekken#jun kazama#kazuya mishima#kazjun#kazujun#kazjun week 2024#kazujunweek2024#yes this is SO GOD DAMN LATE#But it took on a life of its own and it's 16K so#;_; I throw myself on the mercy of the Kaz/Jun shipping court#this is the last prompt so now I gotta finish the others I started lol#There will probably be a sequel to this with Jin's perspective at some point because I am mentally ill for the Mishimas atm#because I imagine it would be so fucking weird to seeing your dad and mom get together after all...that#my favorite part of this fic is the repetitive aspect where they mirror one another a lot#....and tbh Kaz going GET USED TO YELLING MY NAME WOMAN which I think is the most in character thing I've ever written for him#this man is a service dom and a terror#I tried to write more realistic sex scene for them here and that was also quite fun!
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i'm a cis woman, but in the past few years i've developed a habit of headcanoning any male character i relate to as a trans women, beginning a fic trying to explore that, and then miserably falling short as i can never figure out how to end the story. i've recently joined a new fandom and started my most recent attempt at writing this ever-elusive character interpretation i've been trying to explain for years. and it occurs to me that maybe the reason i keep trying to interpret these characters i relate to as women and failing to, is because i'm trying to project the wrong experience. because i think that conclusion i can never fully bring myself to write isn't one about coming to terms with womanhood and embracing that identity, but about coming to terms with being a man.
so tldr im a trans man and this is a coming out post.
#shaking a little bit writing this but like. i dont know.#ive felt. alone a lot and ive been very scared of actually doing anything to make myself happy for a lot of my life#and ive felt a lot of shame about particularly. i dont know.#i feel a lot of shame in general#but about my gender. about feeling like i cant transition because i dont want to do it the way you see in media#and that its cool for other people to be gnc and trans and present however they want but#that itd be wrong for me. that id be faking#and i dont know i think im tired of running from it#im acting like this is some terrible truth. like this is an unspeakable evil i would inflict on the world by doing something that could mak#me happy. make me feel comfortable#i dont want that shame anymore#i never deserved it#anyways. i like the name angus. please call me angus from now on although autumn is actually still fine i do fw that name. always have#but i need to say this and put it out into the world and not take it back#this is my experience. this is my starting point. and fanfic and writing have been a big part of that#anyways. shoutout to#james wilson#most recent blorbo ive tried to trans the gender of. i think ill be able to finish this fic though lol.#trans#coming out#fandom#fanfic#personal#queer#lgbtqia
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~ πππππ’ πππππππ ~
ππ πΆπππ πππ πππ: @charismakat ππ
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π΄π ππΎπΌπ΄ ππΈπ²πΊπ»π΄π π΅ππ΅π ππππΛ*β’ Μ©Μ©Νβ©β’Μ©Μ©Ν*οΌΒ·Μ©Μ©Μ₯Ν
πΆππππ: π΅ππππ
πππππ:Β πΊ,π·πΊπΊ
π»ππ: π°ππππ π©πΎβπ¦±π
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πππππππ’: π°ππππ πππ ππ π°πππππππ π·ππππππ’ ππππ ππ πΈ πππ’π πππ π³πππππ π ππππ ππ ππππ πππ ππππ πππ ππ! π±ππ ππ πππ πππππ’πππ πππππππ ππππ ππ, π°ππππ ππππππ ππ πππ πππππππππππ ππ ππππππππ’ πππππ’. ππ ππππ πππ ππππ£πππ ππππππ πππππππ π³πππππ ππ, ππ πππππππ π ππππππ ππππ πππ ππππ π πππ πππ πππππ ππππππβπ ππππππ ππ-ππππππππππ.
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πΎππππ πππππππππ: @shut-up-jo @someone1348 @itzsana-kiddingmenow
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ππππππππ: ππππππππ πππβ¦πππππ’πππ. π±πππππ. πΈπ ππππ ππ ππππππ’ πππ π’πππ πππ, ππππ ππππ ππ ππππππ πππ π πππ ππππ ππππ πππππ πππππππ π’ππ π ππππ/π πππ πππππ’ ;)
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Μ©Μ©Μ₯ΝοΌ*β’Μ©Μ©Νβ©β’Μ©Μ©Ν*Λπ»π΄πβπ πΆπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎπΎ!!!Λ*β’Μ©Μ©Νβ©β’Μ©Μ©Ν*ΛοΌΒ·Μ©Μ©Μ₯Ν
βApril, you gotta focusβ¦β
βIΒ amΒ focused!β
Donatello crossed his arms along his plastron, glaring at his older sister as his eyebrows knitted together in annoyance. βAlright then. If youβreΒ ever so focusedΒ like you say you areβ¦then riddle me this: whatΒ is that phone doing in your hand?β The softshell turtle asked, pointing to Aprilβs phone that was in the palm of her hand.Β
The girl looked away sheepishly, rubbing the back of her neck and not even bothering to say a rebuttal to the question. The younger teen sighed impatiently, pinching the bridge of his snout.
The two siblings were currently in Aprilβs bedroom, sitting on her carpeted floor along with some papers and folders scattered around them. The two were wearing their pajamasβ as it was night time when they decided they should meet up and study. Wellβ¦for April to study.
The girl in question wore a black t-shirt with green checkerboard pants, and also wearing a bonnet for her hair along with her signature green glasses.Β Donnie on the other hand wore his signature purple hoodie, purple leg warmers and as well as his purple mask.
The older one scoffed, quickly sliding the phone underneath her bed and grabbing the history notes that were placed next to her. The girl straightened her posture, pretending to look over the messy notes she took earlier in class, making 'mhmβs' and 'uh-huhβs' here and there.
βWhat phone?β She asked innocently as if she wasnβt on YouTube a couple seconds ago.
The mutant dramatically sighed, massaging his forehead and laying down on the carpeted floor, his plastron facing up. The human teenager dramatically sighed as well, mimicking her brotherβs fall on the floor.
βYou canβt blame me for this, Dee! Studying is so freakingΒ boring.β She groaned. βWhen am IΒ everΒ going to have to know about these old guys in real life?β April asked genuinely, looking at her notes with the Founding Fathers faces on it before shivering, putting the pictures of them face down. The turtle teen sat back up, giving her an unamused eyebrow raise.
βAprilβ¦β
βNo! Like seriously. Letβs be real for a second here, Don. Who the absolute hell is gonna randomly come up to me and say:Β Who was the guy that led the battle of Ft. Sumter?β She said as she sat up as well. The softshell turtle blinked at her, then blinked at her once more, slightly tilting his head to the side in confusion.Β
βYourβ¦history teacher?β He stated, chuckling a bit. The girl threw a nearby pillow at her brother as he laughed, catching it and throwing it back at her. βBesidesΒ him!β She groaned, putting the pillow to the other side of her.
The purple banded turtle sighed, βRiriβ¦I know this is atrociously boring for you but you got to atΒ leastΒ make an effort here. This is your last grade of the 3rd semester!β Donnie stated sternly, reaching into his backpack and pulling out his computer that he brought with him when sneaking into the other's apartment. The older sighed, crossing her arms and glaring at the floor stubbornly. She absolutely hated when Donnie had a point.
Which was usually 99.9% of the timeβ¦but still!
April rested her cheek in her palms, βI have a 88% in History thoughβ¦β She pouted, trying to reason with her brother that they didnβt really need to study so freaking hard to delay the ONE bad grade sheβs about to get.
And anyway, if she flunked this test, whatβs the worst it could bump her grade down to? An 84? Possibly a 80? Yeahβ¦no. Sheβs completely fine with those odds for sure.
βBesides, itβs in two days.β The human girl said, getting up from where she was sitting to go on her phone again. Donnie huffed, now starting to grow annoyed at his sisterβs lack of motivation and focus. βThe test is in two days and yet you still donβt know the 8th amendmentβ¦β The younger spat, glaring at his computer screen as he began to type more harshly by every passing word he typed.
ββ¦Isnβt that the one which gives us the right to keep and bear arms?β
βThatβs the second amendmentβ¦the eighth amendment is not being able to give cruel or unusual punishments.β Donnie explained whilst rolling his eyes.
Oh sweet pizza supreme in the skyβ¦April was so screwed for this testβ¦
βI was close enoughβ¦β The older groaned, going over to sit next to the other, leaning on his shoulder. βWhatβre you doing, anyway?β She asked, poking the purple banded teenβs cheek as she saw the evident scowl on the younger oneβs face. The softshell rolled his eyes once more, pushing his sister slightly but with no real force to it.
βIβm looking at youβre grades, actually.β Donnie said in a very calm voice which only worked to his benefit as Aprilβs eyes bulged like saucers. She grabbed the young genuis' laptop, looking through the tabs to actually make sure he was on her school app and he didnβt just hack in and steal her account.
βWhaβ since whenΒ the FUCK did you have access to my grades, Donatello?β The older teen asked, looking at the younger as if she was .2 seconds away from hitting him with her bat from here, all the way to New Jersey.
βIβve always had access to your grades.β The younger teenager shrugged, trying his best to ignore his older sisterβs very angry tone. βYour username is April and your password is OβNeilβ¦both in caps. It wasnβt really that hard to figure out, sis. Itβs literally your well-known catchphrase.β He chuckled.
βYour password for all of your electronics is literally Bootyyyshaker9000! You have no right to talk about 'bad passwords.'β April scoffed, raising an eyebrow at Donnie who only laughed more at her retort, taking back his computer. βTouchΓ©.β He nodded.
βBut the reason why Iβm under your school account in the first place is because Iβm looking over your notes and I have made digital flashcards based on most of them. Youβre welcome.β The softshell explained, showing the other teen the flashcards heβs made. The eldest to laughed fondly, βAlright, Mr. Tech wiz. Show me whatcha got.β
βLetβs seeβ¦β The taller teen mumbled, scrolling through the flashcards before settling on one to ask his sibling. βOkayβ¦who was defeated in the Battle of Gettysburg?β He asked, looking up at April only to find a nervous expression plastered on her faceβ¦an expression translating to 'I dunno what the answer is.'
βAbrahamβ¦Lincolnβ¦?β April guessed in a small voice, knowing she was completely 100% wrong in every which way but couldnβt help at least trying.
βWrong; obviously. Butβ¦you already knew that. The correct answer was Robert E Lee.β Donnie stated before looking down at his computer, searching for another flashcard. The softshell was about to ask another question but before he could muster up a word, he saw his sisterβs facial expression.
No longer smug. Nor bored.
She wasβ¦blushing?
βSomething wrong, Riri?β The younger asked, finding the flustered state of his older sister completely hilarious. The girl in questionn cleared her throat, rubbing the back of her neck before looming at her sibling again, βAreβ¦Are you sure thatβs his last nameβ¦? Theβ¦Robert dude you just mentioned.β The older asked as the softshell looked back at the computer, re-reading the text. βMhm. Iβm positive. That is what it says. You can look him up yourself if youβd like.βΒ
April groaned for probably the millionth time, putting her face into her palms. Becauseβ¦Lee? Fucking really? This Robert E Lee guy couldnβt have picked a better last name for himself?Β He HAD to choose that as a last name?
Donnie shook his head fondly at his eldest siblingβs flustered state, searching for more of the flashcards he pulled up on his computer. Preferably more about this Robert E Lee fellow.
This embarrassed state of the eldest was a very rare sightβ kind of like a once-in-a-full-moon sort of thing. So Donnie would do what any good sibling would do in this moment and enjoy the literal hell out of it while it lasted.
The purple cladded teen smiled, βIf you were too much inβ¦a mood to study, you couldβve just told me, April.β He giggly joked, which only caused the older to bury her face into her hands more, muttering a quiet 'shut up', but with no real venom behind it. The softshell chuckled, scrolling through the flashcards before pausing.
Holy mother of Pearlβ¦hold ON a freaking second.
Now that he thought about it, it made so much sense that April was inβ¦a mood. No wonder she was so unfocused! Either heβs completely over-analyzing this wholeβ¦situation or Aprilβs just being a drama queen instead of just asking him to help with her wholeβ¦situation. Either or.
But he was going to bet his money on the first guess.
Suddenly, Donnie was snapped out of his thoughts as April grabbed his shoulderβs and started to shake him back and fourth somewhat in an aggresive manner. She sighed, noticing the pure surprise in the softshellβs eyes that he was now in fact out of Donnie-land and back on Earth.
βOh thank Godβ¦I thought I was going to have to whack you with my bat to get you to respond.β April joked. But the purple banded turtle knew damn well (definitely not because of past experiences) that his sister would not hesitate to use her bat if she needed to.
βAnywaysβ¦we should take a break.β The girl said suddenly, trying to change the subject. The younger teen raised an amused brow, knowing exactly what his sister was doing and decided to play along. The turtle let out a a small laugh, βWe took a break ten minutes ago.β
The eldest rolled her eyes, crossing her arms across her chest a she huffed, βSo letβs take another one!β
Donnie pinched the bridge of his snoutβ he was so SO close to punting April out of her apartment windowβ¦head. first. Oh sweet Gram-Gram up above have mercy on him.
The duo had just spent thirty minutes just arguing back and forth whether or not they should studyβ¦but they havenβt even truly studied yet! If they couldnβt get back on track soon, Donnie would fear he would be here all nightβ¦whichβ¦he wouldnβt really mind, of course. He loves spending time with his sister but he has more important things to do than help her study.
Like watching Bridgerton for example!
β¦Donβt judge himβ¦
But anywayβ April needed to start getting these facts in her brain ASAP! The test was in two days for crying out loud. And Donnie knows that April studying at the very last minute would not always give her B+'s and solid A-'sβ¦much to the olderβs disagreement.
βY'knowβ¦I actually have an idea to help you with youβre sudden lack of motivation towards studying, Ririβ¦β The younger smiled, trying to keep his tone as monotone as possible but couldnβt help the cheeky smile spreading across his face. The human girl raised suspicious a brow, not liking the sudden change of tone and facial expressions from her little brother.
That goofy little turtle was up to something. And April just KNOWS sheβs going to be the victim of whatever he was planning.
βWhatβs this idea of yours, little brother?β She asked, suspicion clear in her voice as her chocolate brown eyed narrowed at him. βFor it to work, can you sit directly in front of me so your back is facing towards yours truly?β The mutant asked, voice still very calm but his expression clearly mischievous. Aprilβs suspicion only rose as her younger brother spokeβ¦but did as she was told, sitting in front of him so her back was facing his front.
βOkaaaaayβ¦? Now what? Any more instructions?β The girl asked, her suspicion being replaced by genuine confusion. The younger teen snickered, βI think it would be better if Iβ¦use an example.β He explained.
βLet me just think of a random questionβ¦oh! During WWI, what did the British manufacture and poison?β The young genius asked, waiting for his sister to answer. He couldnβt see the otherβs expression as of right now, but he could just tell by her body language that she had absolutely no clue. The older rubbed the back of her neck, shrugging, βPshβ¦uh, I dunnoβ¦gunsβ¦?β
Donnie paused for a moment, trying his best to cover up his laugh with a cough. The younger wiped a happy tear from his eye before fixing his posture, putting the computer to the side of him. βIβm sorryβ¦guns? April, how can you poison a GUN?β He asked, trying to understand the logic behind his eldest siblingβs answer.
April groaned, βDude I just said I didnβt know! It was the 1600βs or something! Whoβs to say they DIDNβT poison guns?!β
The softshellβs left eye twitched, βWWI takes place in the 1800βsβ¦β
The chocolate brown eyed teen turned around to her brother slightly, βAre you sure about that?β (John Cena reference goes crazyβ¦)
βYES!!!β
βAlright alright! Jeezβ¦no need to shout. Heard you loud and clear, Houston.β She mumbled, resting her cheek on her palm becauseβ¦
Houston, she definitely had a problem.
Her Civil War test was in two freaking days and she barely even knew what century it took place in. She was screwed. She was the definition of the word screwed.
And anyways, tenth grade sucked major ass anyway. Flunking one History class wouldnβt be so bad. But April knew damn well Donnie, along with Raph, Leo, Mikey, Splinter, her Mom and literally everyone else in here life would not let her even touch an ounce of flunking.
She sighed, ββ¦How is this supposed to be helping me again? Because this is literally the same tactic weβve been doing but instead Iβm facing away from you.β
The young genuis hummed knowingly, looking at the computer screen behind him, βYou got the question I asked wrong, correct?β
βIβ¦mean, yeah. Why are you askiEEEEKβ!β The girl shreiked, hugging her middles as her younger sibling randomly poked her in the ribs. She turned her head around once more, glaring at the taller teen, βDonnieβ¦what the actual fuck?β She seethed.
Which, in retrospect, that tone wouldβve had the young genuis running for the hills any dayβ¦but today was not that day.
βOkayβ¦so hereβs what weβre gonna do, sis.β The younger one grinned cheekily, βIβll ask you Civil War questions from the flashcards. If you get a question right, nothing happens. But if you get a question wrong Iβll have to tickle you.β He finished like it was the most casual sentence to say.
βHow is that fair?β April huffed.
βThis studying tactic helps you with youβre current mood AND helps you study more. Itβs pretty fair if you ask me.β The softshell snickered.
βI hope you get run over by a car when youβre heading back to the lairβ¦β The eldest grumbled, turning back around to face away from the taller teen.
The other barked out a laugh, finding this whole situation completely and utterly hilarious. βLove you too, Riri.β He smiled, βNow! Shall we get started~?β
βDo I even have a choice at this pointβ¦?β
βNoβ¦not really!β The purple banded turtle shrugged, going onto the computer to pull up a question. April giggled slightly, trying to stifle her laughs by covering her mouth. Donnie snickered at the adorable sight, poking his sisterβs side, βI havenβt even tickled you yet and youβre already giggling up a stormβ¦I wonder why that isβ¦β
βShuhut uhup yohou Megaha-mihihind looking thing...β The smaller teen grumbled, swatting at the otherβs hands as he merely chuckled, βAlrightβ¦in what year did the Civil War begin?β He asked.
The glasses wielding teenager thought a bit, βWellβ¦you said earlier tonight it was started in, like, the 1800'sβ¦β
βMhm. So what year?β
βLikeβ¦1855β¦?β She guessed, which resulted in Donnie carrying out his promise as he to tickle her underarms. The older let out an inhuman shriek, clamping her arms down as she kicked her feet on the carpet, βDOHONNIE!!β She shouted through her laughs.
βHm? Whatβs up? You need something April?β
βSTAHAHAP IHIT!β The smaller teen cried out, squirming back and forth. The softshell rolled his eyes fondly, βYouβre just a couple years off. C'mon, just guess.β
β1843?!β
βHigherβ¦β Donnie commented as he scribbled his nails on the sides of her neck. The human girl shrieked, scrunching her shoulders as her back fell against the turtleβs plastron, β1865!!!β
βLowerβ¦thatβs when it ended. But youβre still super close.β The mutant stated, moving his fingers down to tickle at her sides. April shook her head hugging her middles as she banged the balls of her feet harder on the floor, β1864???β
βLowerβ¦β The turtle said as he gave one quick squeeze to her hips. The girl jolted, letting out a loud, hilarious and genuine scream as she laughed, β1861!!! IHIHITβS 1861!!! DAHAHAMMIT *squeal* STAHAHβ!!β The human teen covered her mouth in surprise, blushing profusely at the noise she just let out.
The mutant couldnβt help but giggle in amusement, happy and somewhat shocked at the noise that escaped his siblingβs mouth, βAwe~! Okay, now that was straight up adorable.β
βShuHUT UHUP.β The girl threatened, still hugging her middles which Donnie couldnβt help but chuckle to. βI do not know why you are so hostile towards me. My tactic is helping you!β
βLihihike hehehell ihit ihihihisβ¦β April grumbled. The young genius raised an amused brow, crossing his arms, βWhen did the Civil War start?β
ββ¦1861β¦β She mumbled.
βAnd when did it end?β
ββ¦1865β¦β
Fucking smartassβ¦
βPoint takenβ¦β April huffed as she glared to the side, crossing her arms as the taller teen pulled up another question, βAlrighty then. What fort did Confederate General P.G.T Beauregard fire on to officially start the Civil War?β
The girl blinked, ββ¦What fort? Likeβ¦a pillow fort?β The turtle jabbed her in the side, resulting in a loud squeal from his sister. βIHIβM BEING SERIOUS, YOHOU ASS!β
Donnie feigned a fake gasp, wrapping one arm around Aprilβs chest, keeping her arms in place as the other hand worked its way down and tickled all over her stomach.
The eldest let out an ear piercing scream, kicking her legs on the floor even harder. βIβll ask again: What fort did Confederate General P.G.T Beauregard fire on to start the Civil War?β
βIHIβ *squeak* DAHAβ *hic* FUHUCKIN DAHAHAMMIT!!!β
βMmmβ¦nope. Thatβs not it~!β
βDEEHEEHEE!!!β
βIβm barely even touching you!β Donnie scoffed, βTo think what would happen if Iββ
βFAHAHβ *hic* FAHAHAβ *squeal* FOHORT SUHUHUMTER!!! IHIHIβ *hic* DOHOHON!!!β And just like that, the taller teen stopped yet again as he scrolled on his computer. βCahan Ihi gehehet breaks at leheheast?β April giggled out. Donnie chuckled at the question, βThis right now is your break. Enjoy it while it lasts.β
Oh God up above that little walking talking green beanstalk will be in a world of hurt after all of this was overβ¦
The purple banded turtle released April from his embrace, βThis is an easy one. Who was electedββ
βLIHINCOLN! ABRAHAM LINCOLN!!!β The girl shouted immediately, letting out a huge wave of relief wash through herβ¦that lasted, like, a good second and a half before she felt fingers poking her in the back, causing her to flinch involuntarily. βIHI ANSWERED COHORRECT, YOHOU FOHOHOUR EYED FREEHEEK!β
Donnie let out a satisfied huff, resuming to scribble at the elderβs underarms, βWell first things first: Your wearing glasses right now. So I donβt even know why your setting yourself upββ April squirmed so frantically that her glasses fell off of her face. The softshell turtle couldnβt help but laugh at the sudden action that played in front of him, βI stand corrected.β
The girl wheezed softly, a small tinted blush spreading on her face, βYOHOUβ *squeak* THIHIS IHIHIS CHEATING!!β
βHohow is this cheating?β Donnie asked innocently, tickling the otherβs underarms harder.
βNAHAβ *hic* IHI GOHOHOT IHIT *hic* RIHIHIGHT!!!β
βOh. My apologies then.β The taller teen said, chuckling as the other in front of him grumbled curses and threats here and there. βOkayβ¦what was the CSS Hunley?β
ββ¦Thehe whahahatβ¦?β
βI talked about this several timesβ¦β The turtle mused, his finger inching excruciatingly close to Aprilβs hips. The eldest held onto her little brotherβs wrists, shaking her head back and forth as loud cackles echoed around the room, βIHI REHEALLY *hic* *hic* DUHUHUNO! DOHOHON *squeal* PLEHEASE *hic*!!!β
βOho donβt you even. You should have been listening to me when I was explaining this to you!β
βIHI WAHAS IHI *hic* WAHAHAS!!!β
The softshell chuckled at the retort, tasing April in the side causing her to let out a goblin-like shriek. βWohoahβ¦Iβve never hear thatΒ noise beforeβ¦β The smaller teen wheezed out a tired laugh, slumping against her brotherβs plastron.
Maybe instead of just flunking this test she could just simply pass way right here right now. The younger rested his chin on Aprilβs shoulder, giving her a knowing look. She gulped in giddy panic, small giggles escaping her mouth once again.
He wouldnβt. He would neverβ¦oh, who is April kidding?! Of course that windshield wiper look-a-like wouldβ¦
βWeβll skip this one. The answer was a submarine. We literally listened to Yellow Submarine by The Beatles to help you get the jist of itβ¦β The softshell sighed knowingly, βThis is an easy oneβ¦β
βWhose military genius and personality is often credited with holding the Confederate Army together?β The softshell asked, wiggling his fingers near Aprilβs sides in an anticipatory manner.
βSTAHAP DOING THAHAT!!!β April yelled. βIβm not doing anything! Youβre going to get it wrong anyway so Iβm just participating in the inevitable.β The young genius said, putting his hands in his lap and smiling down on his computer. More nervoud giggles escaped the otherβs mouth, wanting to absolutely punt her little brother right here and right now.
Because believe it or not, she did actually know the answer to this questionβ¦since the answer was that dumb Robert E. Lee guy.
And worst of all, Donnie knows she knows the answer to the question. He just wants to be a little shit.
βTimes up, OβNeil~!β
βWHAHAT!?!? YOHOUΒ NEHEVER *squeal* SAHAHAID IHI *squeal* WAHAS TIHIMED!!!β The eldest squealed.
βWell I did just now, didnβt I?β The younger one teased, pinching the spot where Aprilβs side met her hips. βOHO YOHOHOUβ *squeak* FUHUHUCKIN SHIHIHIT!!! MY *hic* GOHOD! NAHAT *hic* THEHERE!!!β
βAw but why not~? Is riiiight here better~?β The purple banded turtle asked innocently, tickling his sisterβs hips mercilessly. The girl lurched her back up out in hopes that she could at least buck Donnie off of her, but the younger turtle only smiled and continued his attack as he drilled his fingers into his sisterβs hips.
April screeched, βDEEHEE!!! YOHOU LIHITTLE SHIHAβ *hic* NAHAT *squeal* THEHE HIHI- *hic* PLEHEHEASE!!!β
βD'aww~! Is my tough big sister too ticklish for this~? I think she is~!β Donnie teased. βSTAHAP STAHAP!! YOHOU *squeal* GEHET *hic* OHOHOFF OHOF *hic* MEEHEE!!!β
βOho my banana pancakesβ¦I forgot how ticklish you are despite your usual tough teen demeanorβ¦βΒ
April screamed in laughter, βDOHOHONNIE!!!β
βYes, my beloved older sister whom I love dearly?β
βSTAHAHAP *hic* IHIT NOHOHOW!!!β
βThen whatβs the answer~? I know you know it~!β
βOKAHAHAY! OKAHAY!!! THAHAT RAHAβ *squeak* THEHE ROHOBERT *hic* GUHUHUY!!! DEEHEE COHOME OHOHON!!β The girl laughed, happy tears welling up in her eyes slightly. The taller teen stopped, letting the other slump against him as she giggled tiredly. βSo~! Based on everything weβve gone over tonightβ¦could you give me a quick little summary on what we went over?β
April rolled her eyes, adjusting herself so she was facing her little brother again. The softshell grabbed a Sprite from Aprilβs mini fridge at the bottom of her bed, tossing her one of the sodaβs.
The elder teenager basically chugged the drink, putting the empty can to the side, pondering her answer a little bit before saying, βThe Cihivil Wahar staharted inβ¦like, 1861 and ended in 1865. Basically, Confederate troopsΒ fihired onΒ Fohort Sumterβ which ihihis in Charleston Haharbor. Sohouth Carolina could nohot put uhuhup with a federal fohort blohohocking aha sea portββ The teen paused, looking at her brother in pure shock as the other just smiled back at her.
ββ¦Holy fucking shit. I sound like yohou explaining sohohome gadget ohor something.β The girl chuckled out. βIβll take that as a compliment.β The purple cladded turtle said, crossing his arms amusingly.
April chuckled at the gesture, resting her cheek on her palm again, βYeheahβ¦I guess. Thanks fohor the help, Deeheeβ¦β
βAnything for my big sis!β The softshell smiled, turning to close his computer. βWe should do these study sessions more often! It helped you know more about your topic and it helped you with your current mood.β He grinned teasingly.
βYouβre out of your damn mind.β The eldest glared, crossing her arms as she scoffed at the offer. But the younger did 100% take notice that she didnβt deny the suggestion by any means.
Β·Μ©Μ©Μ₯ΝοΌ*β’Μ©Μ©Νβ©β’Μ©Μ©Ν*Λπ΅πΈπ½Λ*β’Μ©Μ©Νβ©β’Μ©Μ©Ν*ΛοΌΒ·Μ©Μ©Μ₯ΝΒ
(πΏ.π.: πΈπ π’ππ πππππ’ππ ππππ πππ, ππππππ ππππππ!!!)
#If you are unawareβ¦YES. Robert E Lee is an actual person#Heβs ugly afβ I donβt reccommend searching him up#HIS LAST NAME THO?!?!? MY GOSH during History class in Middle School I was blushing up a STORM#I projected onto April sm in this itβs not even funny ππ#Where are all the Lee!April tickle fics bruh???#We need to show her some love you guys π₯Ήπβ¨ππ#Rottmnt#Rottmnt tickle#Lee!April#Ler!Donnie#Rottmnt tickle fic#Rottmnt tickle fanfiction#I love these two sm theyβre the duo EVER (I say that with every duo EVERβ¦)#ππ#DNA DUOOO AHHHH#Whoever came up with that duo name ur a genuis u deserve an Oscar#Also Don watching Bridgerton is canon (idk how to spell it HELPPPPP)#I was in the writing room TRUUUUST βΊοΈπ
πΎ#Tmnt tickle#I do *COugH* have another *COUgh* Lee!April fic in the *cOugH* works so look out for that#Whaaaaat I mean I didnβt say anythingggg π«£π«£π«£β¦#I hope you guys like this though#π₯²ππΎ#Idk how well this will do since I donβt think ppl like Lee!April a lot over the turtles but ughmshdhdm#THROWS THIS DUMPSTER FIRE OF A FIC ON UUU πππππ©·#Also uhβ¦this is gonna be like my 6th Rise fic I think??????#Damn.#If no one is going to write for this girlboss I will GLADLY do it myself π₯Ήπππ©·#Tried making this one a TAAAAAAD bit longer ππ
πΎβ¦#The Grape duoβ¦my absolute babiesβ¦Iβm gonna SOBBBB I love them smΒ β¨ππ
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me waiting for my writerβs block to fuck off and leave me alone so i can finish this chapter:
#my creativity is just so dead rn and it makes me want to crawl out of my own skin#iβve been waiting MONTHS to finally have a little bit of free time to breathe and catch up on writing stuff#and naturally now that i have i am so mentally and emotionally drained i can barely string a sentence together#i feel so distant and detached from my characters#and yes i know itβll pass#but i just feel so caught in this headspace rn and needed to vent#iβm SO close to finishing this chapter for good but i have well and truly fallen at the final hurdle#the perfectionism has got me#ugh#also if anyone reading this is worried about four walls being updated#please donβt#i literally circle through this headspace every single chapter#and it hasnβt stopped me yet#(and it never will either. i couldnβt give up on this fic if i tried)#but itβs just hitting me particularly hard this last week#why is writing such an agonising process sometimes#anyway#enough rambling from me for one night#iβll drag myself back to my laptop and see if i can work some magic#wish me luck#writing stuff#lulu posts
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Just finished rereading ITNL chapter 2 again
Yknow, it's long felt like a weaker chapter to me, especially compared to chapter 1. It's a Necessary chapter, but it's basically an entire chapter of introspection. Add in the fact that I wrote it in a single day and was half falling asleep by the end of editing it, but pressing onwards anyways bc I wanted So Badly to get it out that night...
The Legato part was the weakest for that. I remember staring at it and breaking my brain just trying to make it sound better before just giving up and posting. But when I worked on my full-fic re-edits about.. a year ago now? A year and a bit. I think it was October ish of 2023. But I focused on that part again, trying to get it up to my standards to be satisfied with it.
Coming back to it after some number of months, my brain relatively fresh, I think I actually did a pretty decent job. Despite being an introspective chapter, it really drives home how Wrecked vash is about it all. I like to say that chapter 1 is like a thesis to the fic, where you get vash's goals laid out pretty clearly (him picturing the things he wants to fix + him picturing his dream of having all the people he loves around a table with him, including Knives. It serves as motivation for him jumping back in time in the first place and it remains his driving force throughout the fic). In contrast, chapter 2 is... almost a secondary thesis. We see his doubt, his fears, his panic. We see the things that he's going to be struggling with throughout the whole fic. His wish to handle it all on his own, as well as how overwhelming it all is to him. Chapter 2 is the necessary second side to chapter 1's thesis, showing the weakness in his own strength and drive.
The cracks in his own unstoppable force.
Idk it's just interesting to me. Having been away from it long enough, I think I really do appreciate chapter 2 after all.
#speculation nation#itnl shit#kinda wanna post Thoughts for each chapter as i work on rereading this fic#anecdotes about what i remember doing while writing and thoughts about the chapters themselves.#part of my goal with rereading this fic is to reconnect myself with who i was while i was writing it.#ive changed so much since then that it feels like a different person wrote this fic. which gets in the way of my immersion#and is part of why it's been so long since i last updated.#i tried to force it back in july. managed to get a chapter out but im not entirely satisfied with it.#im probably gonna try to do some editing on it when i get to that point. there are a few things i want to improve about it.#the key thing being that i just Cant force it or else the finished product wont be to the level of quality i want#and i cant Keep writing in the same way i would if i was fully immersed.#this isnt to say chapter 19 is bad. people seemed to really like it. but theres just... something missing from it for me. just a bit.#i think the thing that most influences my writing's quality is how much i put myself into the character's brain#so even if the prose itself isnt the most masterful. the writing is so in touch with the character's mind that it's really impactful.#i'd like to think at least π
#but the other side of that is the fact that my writing just isnt as good if im not fully invested and immersed. it just isnt.#so that was the problem with 19. and im gonna try to fix those parts where that feels most apparent.#the chapter will overall be the same. just. this is my perfectionism speaking probably lol#anyways yes. full reread to really get back into it. replying to comments to remember that people love my fic.#engaging with readers and also with my own analysis. i think that this will help a lot with re-engaging myself.#and if i do this right then it wont be many months before another update again.#i'll be able to go back into it and Stay in it. for hopefully Plenty more chapters and updates#gonna write at least 100k of ITNL this next year Just You Watch. maybe even more if i can manage it.#πͺπͺπͺπͺπͺ i believe in myselfffff
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how the fuck is it already november 25th?!!?!!?
(time is so fucked up)
anyway, happy one year anniversary to my fic βif only there was more timeβ and posting on ao3 for the first time!
sincerely canβt believe that iβve been writing for a year, how did that happen???
#i still canβt believe i decided to post anything at all#i remember wanting to keep fic writing to myself#but right after clicking post on ch 1 i went to my roommates and was like#guess what i just did!!!!#i didnβt even know i liked creative writing until this fic#but i feel so incredibly happy that i found this hobby#it helped me in so many ways#it got me out of the cave#i got my creative spark back that i foolishly thought i lost#this is the largest writing project i've ever worked on#i had no idea what i was doing at any point#the idea just needed to get out and i tried my best#is it completely accurate to the characters? probably not but whoβs to say?#i like to think i have some idea now but i can never really be sure#i sincerely love this fic despite its flaws it'll always hold a special place in my heart#also still canβt believe that ppl actually liked it and left such nice comments!! that's actually crazy!!#like iβll never get over that it still doesnβt feel real#here i am now with 6 works and 227k words in total written#that is so fucking much i have no idea how i did that#and how the fuck did i write this fic in less than 6 months??? where did that drive go???#anyways shout out to my followers that are here bc of this fic#i love you more than anything <3#and to the few that have read the entire series: i will write the last installment one day!!#i will not leave it unfinished!!
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s-series? frenemies to lovers? no? π₯Ί
series yes!! i have not forgotten about it!! i waz literally thinking of it last night in bed bcos my overconfident brain thinks it may manage to do two series so i can do both frenemies & friends to loversβ¦.
but gah damn i also have to write the second part to a little less conversation soβ¦. π€² spare patience? i have lots of ideas but working on getting them written!
#yeah the vibes i had for frenemies to lovers was so insane i was like naur i cant waste them#figuring out how to do them tho. i have plot for one (1) of them#iβm also writing the biggest fic iβve ever attempted on my other blog currently so iβm maxing out my writing brain HAHA#but iβve always tried to be less hard on myself on this blog so i am CARRYING that energy in some series#jay answers#anon
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5, 9, 12!
crab!! hi hi hi hi hi hiiiii~! ty for quastions :3
from fanfic asks for the new year
5. Which WIP is first on your list to complete this year? Will you post a snippet?
aha, well. technically the first is mini heist!au but none of it is written that is in the shape of the final thing that i haven't already posted on here so i'm gonna cheat and say uh. wow huh okay then i kind of have no idea. ah! maybe my arthurcobb fic then! cos it sure won't be narrative!fic, lol!
here is a snippet from the current draft which is uhh three and a half years old (by which i mostly mean to say, there are a couple things in here i would write differently now.):
Arthur brings his coffee up to the counter where Dom has already deposited his onion rings and says, βExcuse me, can I purchase a β a temporary phone?β If he doesn't call it a burner maybe he will come off as more the kind of person he actually is. The cashier puts up a finger in question and Arthur nods but behind him Dom says firmly, βTwo.βΒ Arthur turns, surprised. βWhy β we donβt need two?β Theyβre traveling together, after all. Arthurβs not about to leave Dom alone, so itβs not like Dom will need his own phone. Itβs not like Domβs super functional, anyway. The three days heβd spent on Arthurβs couch before they read the news and had to leave town extremely suspiciously, heβd really just spent on the couch. βWe donβt need two phones, Dom,β Arthur repeats.Β βWhat if we get separated,β Dom points out. βHow would we get in contact with each other again? You should have your own phone, too.β Arthur would rather not think about circumstances that would separate them. Dom says, βArthur,β and it feels pointed. Something like panic hollows Arthurβs chest. Things are already out of control, apparently. Two days into being on the run and apparently Dom can call these shots but he canβt be on the run by himself.
9. Short term goals⦠what do you hope to complete this week or in January?
ahaha actually, getting this ask made me decide that i'm going to try my absolute best to finish the project i've been calling "mini heist!au" (which ... at this point ... is just an au of heist!au without any heists in it, lmao) this month! i used answering this ask as my bribe for reading through all the existing material and drawing up a revision plan / new fic story structure actually. i'm not sure i'll be able to, i suspect there are 2-4 drafts and i simply do not write that fast (at least one from scratch based on a new outline, possibly a second from scratch, and then a second/third that's just like. content/theme/cadence/character arcs etc revisions. though that might get complex enough to be two drafts). but we'll see! there are still 24 days so at this current moment i am optimistic :3
12. Will you change anything about the way you edit or rewrite this year?
YES I SURE FUCKING WILL. I HAVE BEGUN IT ACTUALLY, mostly i'm continuing to test a thing i tried in december 2023 to see if it still works for projects that aren't the specific situation of the beginning of devotion (so far, yes!) anyway the way that process goes is like this (recipe below):
first, write a terrible draft. some scenes can just be a note of what needs to happen. ideally: expend as little fucking effort on this as possible bc like. almost none of this will stay. just write enough to get the vibes of what you're going for.
second, read through that draft taking notes of what you like or don't like (or, the way i phrase it for myself to make the goal clearer "what feels like it is aligned with my vision for the fic vs what isn't") but most importantly. WHY.
for me doing this second step has 2/2 turned into "here is a rough outline of the story, completely restructured" but also, with no ending (which is fine, i just have to trust that the ending will appear when more of the draft is written).
third, compile those notes on a new draft into a narrative-order outline (linear for me).
fourth, write the new draft.
fifth, try to do step 2 again. but what i found for the beginning of devotion and therefore what i'm to a certain extent expecting, is that i will just have a bunch of Ns/dislikes and then go. ah. because the things i dislike are too granular to require big-picture story structure changes now.
sixth, copy the most recent draft into a new doc. and read through and revise directly on the page. maybe title at some point so that revision stuff is aligned with the mood/tone/content/vibes/whatever of the title. and maybe come up with initial tags and a summary here also to make sure the vibes are all aligned. hopefully the content of the ending will become clear at this point and you'll draft that for the first or second time.
seventh, idk i like to do an out-loud readthrough bc reading cadence is important to me personally. and also i am scared to lose the skill of reading aloud considering i do it about zero times a year other than this.
that's it basically.
#hidey speaks#ask game#hidey talks fic#is that my tag lol#man my paragraphs used to be so chonkyyy#but also wow im kind of emotional ... some of my older writing is so fucking beautiful#in a way i tried to train myself out of pretty hard the last two years. and now mmm. i'm better at structure but#i'm not sure i know how to get some of that lyricism back
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As a writer, do you think you read fic differently in fandom's you've written in, or differently once you do write for them if you haven't before?
huh! yeah, i think i do. i'd never really thought about this until now. i guess writing or having written for a fandom makes me look at other fic more closely, especially at character voices - do i think He Would Fucking Say That? am i buying this? would they sound differently if i were writing this? i don't think it takes away from the enjoyment of reading fic at all, but once you've tried to pin down a voice yourself, you get more persnickety about it.
#like i'm glad we don't all write characters the same way (and im a defender to the death actually of ooc fic bc well. it's fic)#(it needs diversity even if some ppl find certain takes or cliches or fanon things bad. i think it takes all sorts yknow. healthy ecosystem#but i def look out for which writers make a character sound the way i'd also want them to sound if i've written for a fandom#and conversely for things that He Would Not Fucking Say etc#and i never really care that much if i've not tried to write for sth myself#asks#anon
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> posts a fic i'm proud of about dark subject matter to do with five and his abuse, which came from a very personal place, on AO3
> gets a comment
> it is, Course, a hate comment from an anti, demanding on anon to know why i would 'spend my value as a writer who's read Legacies' to write it
> roasts their ass like a thanksgiving turkey and immediately goes to write more of the thing
#LL tag#antis cw#the entitlement is unreal and it Will get you made fun of sorry#like for one thing first and foremost my art is for me; unless i am specifically writing something as a gift for someone else#which i do when i do it because it brings me joy#but also i do find happiness; joy; and fulfillment in posting art that i made for myself; and it being meaningful to other people#i've got LL fics that are ten years old that people still mention having loved now and then; and that i still get kudos on#and it is so humbling in the best way; i cannot express how much my opinion on it is not 'lol go fuck yourselves i don't care'#.......BUT. your 'value' as a writer/artist/etc in fandom is not something you '''spend'''#you are a *person* who shared your time and effort and a little part of your soul#that nourishes people it resonates with; until they have enough left over to maybe share some of theirs right back#a fandom that is good for you and treating you decently will leave you with more of yourself to share; not less#the value you are bringing to a fandom is *you*#what your value to the fandom is *not* is#'someone who's read the thing i like; puts words on paper; and is therefore categorically capable of making content for me to consume'#'and ONLY content for ME to consume'#'if you write anything i don't want to read you are personally taking food out of the mouths of me and my starving children'#writers and artists in fandom are not ATMs for the fandom to leave empty#and if anyone tries to treat you like one they're an entitled weirdo who's actively dehumanizing you & i advise you to drop their ass & run#anyway i just have a lot of thoughts about the subject and i am grateful to people in fandom who aren't Like This#whereas anon can use the block button or cry themself to sleep at night every time i post another fic about five being an abuse survivor#the salt files#abuse mention cw#grooming mention cw
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sorry to get sappy on main but i wanted to pop in and say thank you for the love that βnot mineβ has been receiving :β) out of all the fics iβve written thus far iβd say this one is not only my favorite but the most personal, so it has genuinely meant the world for me to read through all of your feedback on it π€
#when i hear shit like people being able to resonate/relate to the not mine mc i MELT#bc i was nervous to include as much emotional turmoil and vulnerability as i did#and i not only feel seen as a writer bc of comments like this but as a human being#because the fear of losing a friend is so real!!!#as is the fear of love!!!#and while i was by no means writing the mc with myself in mind (πππ i would never)#i most definitely tried to incorporate a more realistic approach to their feelings#which inadvertently required that i reference some of my own experiences w/said emotions#as a result the fic very much ended up being a part of myself put into words#and that is a very strange thing to have happen indeed#OK I HAVE RAMBLED ENOUGH#but seriously thank you all#i truly do love that fic (and lix) so much#*musings
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