#but it was about my depression!!!
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urrghh i wanna draw so bad but that would mean getting up and . errmm
#uhhhhhhhh Depression sorta prevents that frim happening..#No Motivation..#instead i lay here and have a crisis#omg so i volunteered to speak at graduation#and my speech got rejected#tbf i was hella nervous while presenting it#but it was about my depression!!!#and i was Proud of it!!!!!!! what the f!! 😾#oh wellz#i am NOT speaking at the awards ceremony#rambling#oh 2 have friends.. sigh.....
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When a cunty witch beats you to death then steals your boy toy for eternal torment 😢 (based on that 'don't you miss her???' meme)
#the og Pathetic Little Meow Meow#catwin#the cat king#thomas the cat king#edwin payne#edwin paine#dead boy detectives#dead boy detectives spoilers#dbda#dbda spoilers#crystal palace#niko sasaki#my art#i feel like we dont talk about the Cat King's depression outfit enough#its so horrible i love it so much those ugly fucking sunglasses#whats even the point his kept boy is off leash and being tortured by a woman in fishnets#catwin fanart
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more t4t steddie because it turns out it wasn't the black mold and i'm still deranged
#steddie#stranger things#t4t steddie#stevie harrington#eddie munson#context: my hyperfixation lasted my entire year in my last house so i assumed it was mold or co2 poisoning or something#i think it just went away because i was. Severely depressed#anyway today i thought about steph getting her hair coloured or doing her nails and just enjoying being a girl after being closeted#and almost started crying
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Forest Guardians
#artists on tumblr#starting off 2024 with my favorite totally normal size animal the moose#if you've seen a big one irl you know what i mean#the year is starting with seemingly every big corporation hopping on the A I train#depressing#keep on creating my fellow artists#and crafters and writers#and musicians and voice actors#don't let them automate the fun out of your life#i don't care if machines can make art more “efficiently”#i don't want to be efficient!#i want to be unhinged!#be unhinged about your art draw your blorbos draw the things that claw at your brain don't be civil about it like the machines#whatever you're creating i'm proud of you
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a moment of silence for all us disabled ones who had to watch each of their friends move on with their lives without you and get jobs, go to school, have partners come and go, get engaged and move house etc.
shout out to my fellow struggling people who are still sitting in the same bedroom they grew up in. the ones who can't get a job, can't make new friends, can't find a partner or partners, can't move house and can't go to school.
I hope one day we can all find someone to at least sit with us in our rooms. I see you and I understand... and I'm sorry we can't be that person for each other
#hell o void#hell o hadal#disabled#disability#invisible disability#nuerodivergent#nuerodiversity#mental health#agoraphobia#depression#anxiety#chronic pain#chronic fatigue#autistic#autism#i know this applies to more people but i am too tired to think of more tags and i really need to stop posting and do other things#but this is something i struggle with constantly and cant get over so#about#it hurts even more knowing that my friends who have done this are also disabled#like.... what do you mean they can overcome their disabilities and have lives why the fuck cant i do that
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transformers go go is reviving me after transformers one tore my heart to shreds, taped it back together, put it in a kiln and threw it off a cliff where those pieces then get destroyed by corrosion and smashed into by a blind shark, WHY ARE THESE SO SOUL SUCKINGLY CUTE
#the damn fucking whiplash I got coming back from tfone bawling my eyes out going through grief and then seeing cutie patootie baby pies#collapsing from cuteness go go stuff. It requires medical attention I fear and by medical attention I mean therapy#BUMBLEBEE OH BUMBLEBEE MY CHILD im going to kidnap you and keep you in a tower#they're looking at bumblebee because look at the baby!!#ARIEL IS SO CUTE AND PRETTY I LOVE HER#the other two give me depression i can't talk about them rn#transformers#elita one#elita 1#optimus prime#orion pax#d 16#megatron#tf bumblebee#b 127#transformers go! go!#transformers ariel#tf ariel#transformers one
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gooooooooorls
#critical role#fanart#the mighty nein#cr2#nott the brave#jester lavorre#beauregard lionett#yasha nydoorin#i decided to color them#i think it came out pretty neat#still not sure about patterns on beau's coat but euughrrhh#if i not finish now i'll newer finish#yasha's pallet is depressing btw#and i respect her for it#slay you depressed queen#nott is my favorite shade of green probably the easiest part of this whole piece#drawing her is a delight
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There's just something so fascinating about the way the Exandrian pantheon has decided to handle the Aeor Situation™ - by electing a few of their kind to be born as mortals in order to infiltrate the city.
The first to bring herself low was Ioun, and I can only imagine how lonely that must have been for her. To feel infinite wisdom creeping into her adolescent mind? To rise through Aeor's ranks knowing what they'd do to her if the authorities discovered the truth of her existence? Waiting, hoping, perhaps even praying that the other gods would follow through with the plan.
Sarenrae has a husband and children as Trist. I can't help but consider the parallels to Liliana Temult, with a 'higher calling' pulling a mother away from her family. The conversations in the temple suggest that she would have been aware of what she was by the time she started her family. Yet she loves them, cherishes them, even knowing that she might not see them again. Will Amaris, Haylie, and Topher learn that Trist is a goddess? Or will that only be discovered when they find their way to her realm in Elysium?
The Matron was once mortal, and she willingly returned to that form in order to help her newfound siblings dismantle the Aeorian threat. Her steward since childhood was Purvan, helping raise and guide her despite his old age. Imagine being a little girl, guarded by the Champion of Ravens himself and his wolven companion, completely unaware of your own divinity until later in life. Imagine the night she woke up, remembering her ascendency, seeing Purvan and recognising him.
And what of the families that gave birth to and raised the four Betrayer Gods? What of the halfling family who watched their precocious daughter scale a fence with far too much ease than it should be? The day the tortle's parents found him crying in pain and tearing at his skin to distract himself from a memory so distant and yet so real? Or Milo, who became a priest, not to follow in the light of the Dawnfather (like his parents may have thought), but to mock his brother even as a mortal?
These gods spent entire childhoods with families and friends, taking refuge from the skirmishes caused by their other siblings. Who, despite those similarities, have very different opinions of humanity, of Aeor, and themselves.
#it's late but i'm in my feels about this#like i thought it was mildly depressing how dynasty kids wake up one day with dreams of their old lives#but imagine realising you're a god in the body of a 15-year-old boy and you need to find your siblings so you can infiltrate a hostile city#critical role#critical role spoilers#cr spoilers#cr meta#exu downfall#cr downfall#the prime deities#betrayer gods#ioun#the knowing mistress#arcadia#sarenrae#the everlight#cr trist#the matron of ravens#cr emhira#asmodeus#the lord of the hells#milo cowst#the spider queen#umleta
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a glass sun 1/2
#my art#my stuff#this is really fucking long so im gonna have to break it up into multiple reblogs#(howling) WAUGHHHHHHH#i love aishang by xiaoshiguniang#i love to implicate my alma mater in my art about being gay in the shittiest most conservative corner of singaporean society#by some terrible trick of fate i ended up in the conservative chinese christian cishet circuit from primary school to end of hs#obviously i am not most of these things but there i was. Depressed#and there i was after that at Liberal Arts College. the 4 years i spent there were a clusterfuck#but like a good and outrageous and lively clusterfuck#and i graduated in may this year and when i came back it was for the first time in 10 months. it was like. what da hell#like i love being here in specific ways but there is also the pain of being seen as something you're not constantly#can i blame them? i ask myself this every day. for most of my ex classmates and relatives i Am the only not cis person they know#idk my lottery number was bad this corner of society really is that bad#and so its like. idk dawg anyway i aint offering solutions but u get it like it fucks with your head to be misgendered either which way 24/#but to leave them behind would be to leave the only people who knew me for the first 19 years behind. and thats a lot of my life#i am 23!!!!!! ough#anyway. whatever. if u liked it i have a ko-fi#reblogos appreciated
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they want to talk about mental illness and acceptance and how everyone is a little ocd it's cute and quirky and their "intrusive thoughts" are about cutting their hair off and you say yours are about taking a razorblade to your eye and they say ew can you not and everyone is a little adhd sometimes! except if you're late it's a personality flaw and it's because you are careless and cruel (and someone else with adhd mentions they can be on time, so why can't you?) and it's not an eating disorder if it's girl dinner! it's not mania if it's girl math! what do you mean you blew all of your savings on nonrefundable plane tickets for a plane you didn't even end up taking. what do you mean that you are afraid of eating. get over it. they roll their little lips up into a sneer. can you not, like, trauma dump?
they love it on them they like to wear pieces of your suffering like jewels so that it hangs off their tongue in rapiers. they are allowed to arm-chair diagnose and cherrypick their poisons but you can't ever miss too many showers because that's, like, "fuckken gross?" so anyone mean is a narcissist. so anyone with visual tics is clearly faking it and is so cringe. but they get to scream and hit customer service employees because well, i got overwhelmed.
you keep seeing these posts about how people pleasers are "inherently manipulative" and how it's totally unfair behavior. but you are a people pleaser, you have an ingrained fawn response. in the comments, you have typed and deleted the words just because it is technically true does not make it an empathetic or kind reading of the reaction about one million times. it is technically accurate, after all. you think of catholic guilt, how sometimes you feel bad when doing a good deed because the sense of pride you get from acting kind - that pride is a sin. the word "manipulation" is not without bias or stigma attached to it. many people with the fawn response are direct victims of someone who was malignantly manipulative. calling the victims manipulative too is an unfair and unkind reading of the situation. it would be better and more empathetic to say it is safety-seeking or connection-seeking behavior. yes, it can be toxic. no, in general it is not intended to be toxic. there is no reason to make mentally ill people feel worse for what we undergo.
you type why is everyone so quick to turn on someone showing clear signs of trauma but you already know the fucking answer, so what's the point of bothering. you kind of hate those this is what anxiety looks like! infographics because at this point you're so good at white-knuckling through a severe panic attack that people just think you're stoic. even people who know the situation sometimes comment you just don't seem depressed. and you're not a 9 year old white kid so there's no way you're on the spectrum, you're not obsessed with trains and you were never a good mathematician. okay then.
mental illness is trending. in 2012 tumblr said don't romanticize our symptoms but to be fair tiktok didn't exist yet. there's these series of videos where someone pretends to be "the most boring person on earth" and is just being a normal fucking person, which makes your skin crawl, because that probably means you are boring. your friend reads aloud a profile from tinder - no depressed bitches i fucking hate that mental illness crap. your father says that medication never actually works.
you still haven't told your grandmother that you're in therapy. despite everything (and the fact it's helping): you just don't want her to see you differently.
#writeblr#warm up#to be clear let me state again: i think you should id however you fucking want if it helps you seek peace#but there is a HUGE difference between being like '.... im undiagnosed but i think i might be X'#and a person who is like ''omg my intrusive thoughts made me buy a birkin!!!''#babe mine made me throw up bc they disgusted me so much <3#mine made me hurt myself evenly. even when i wanted to stop. i have had to put my hand on the stove MULTIPLE TIMES#and again i'd rather have 10000 people get help for something they don't need help for#than have 1 kid NOT get help#but there has GOTTTTT to be a middle ground here#bc at this point it isn't ''raising awareness''#it's . fucking misinformation. and ''what this picture says about you!!!!!''#& yes! im mostly talkin about ppl who are actually disgusted and offended by signs of mental illness#but use it to defend THEIR actions#like babe you hate when kids start yelling in the walmart? but you YOuRSELF can yell?#you are depressed so it's fine you were cruel to your spouse?#but if your spouse spends too much time in bed she's a lazy fuck?#your partner needs to do everything for you bc of your history in trauma? but when SHE has needs she's being clingy and gross?#HUGE difference here between whom i think most of my followers are btw. like#all it takes is fucking anyyyy empathy or kindness . like.#anyway it's hard to explain im hoping we all know the person im talking about lol
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Council of lovefools.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wei wuxian#jiang yanli#jiang cheng#They don't have an actual sleepover in this scene but the vibes were so sleepover coded...I had to get them cozied up.#Late night talks with friends and family are some of the best conversations.#My siblings and I used to have room sleepovers with each other (Actually an excuse to stay up and talk about runescape)#Currently my flatmates and I also have really great heart to hearts late into the night.#Pondering shit like 'What defines confidence?“ and ”Why are people terrified of letting themselves fall in love?"#All that aside; There is a really great conversation between JC and WWX here. They are so close and yet so far way from each other!#Fundamentally they *agree* about many things - but JC now has to play the role of someone more 'mature'.#His temper is reigned in and he had to take a more nuanced approach. Whereas WWX can be far more reactionary.#JC has changed to become someone more mature (or at least he is trying).#Contrast this attitude with the scene *right* after where WWX literally goes baby mode with JYL. Rolling around going “I'm Fwee years old”.#When children are hurt we comfort them with hugs and warm food and a laugh. It's not enough when you're an adult. It's not simple anymore.#WWX is stuck in the past when everyone else is shifting and moving on! It's a depression allegory (and just...actual depression)#But we also get to see how some things have stayed the same. They still bicker about soup. They still tease. They are still together.#They all care for each other very much but they are struggling against trauma and are not equipped to talk about it.#You can't really blame WWX for being so protective over JYL. But JC is right: “You don't have a say in who she likes.”#It may have started as an arranged marriage but *she* is *choosing* what her heart wants. JC sees that. WWX cannot.#The final act of love is letting go after all.
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no time to celebrate
#drew this thinking their bdays were during night yorb summer for some reason#i went looking for the clip midway and when i saw it was the other way around i kinda died a little inside#BUT I AM NOTHING IF NOT COMMITTED !!!!#fantasy high#dimension 20#fantasy high junior year#gorgug thistlespring#riz gukgak#so anyways we can pretend this is a time quangle thing yes yes#they fall asleep making the solar lasso and no one has it in them to wake them up (esp riz)#so the rest of the bad kids leave them stuff for when they wake up#joint birthday party is real and depressing ! but not really ! the power of friendship is still very real#dont ask me the logistics of the hangvan interior ill die#i dont wanna thnk about this piece anymore it aged me 10 years#my art
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People ask me sometimes how I'm so confident that we can beat climate change.
There are a lot of reasons, but here's a major one: it would take a really, really long time for Earth to genuinely become uninhabitable for humans.
Humans have, throughout history, carved out a living for themselves in some of the most harsh, uninhabitable corners of the world. The Arctic Circle. The Sahara. The peaks of the Himalayas. The densest, most tropical regions of the Amazon Rainforest. The Australian Outback. etc. etc.
Frankly, if there had been a land bridge to Antarctica, I'm pretty sure we would have been living there for thousands of years, too. And in fact, there are humans living in Antarctica now, albeit not permanently.
And now, we're not even facing down apocalypse, anymore. Here's a 2022 quote from the author of The Uninhabitable Earth, David Wallace-Wells, a leader on climate change and the furthest thing from a climate optimist:
"The most terrifying predictions [have been] made improbable by decarbonization and the most hopeful ones practically foreclosed by tragic delay. The window of possible climate futures is narrowing, and as a result, we are getting a clearer sense of what’s to come: a new world, full of disruption but also billions of people, well past climate normal and yet mercifully short of true climate apocalypse. Over the last several months, I’ve had dozens of conversations — with climate scientists and economists and policymakers, advocates and activists and novelists and philosophers — about that new world and the ways we might conceptualize it. Perhaps the most capacious and galvanizing account is one I heard from Kate Marvel of NASA, a lead chapter author on the fifth National Climate Assessment: “The world will be what we make it.”" -David Wallace-Wells for the New York Times, October 26, 2022
If we can adapt to some of the harshest climates on the planet - if we could adapt to them thousands of years ago, without any hint of modern technology - then I have every faith that we can adjust to the world that is coming.
What matters now is how fast we can change, because there is a wide, wide gap between "climate apocalypse" and "no harm done." We've already passed no harm done; the climate disasters are here, and they've been here. People have died from climate disasters already, especially in the Global South, and that will keep happening.
But as long as we stay alive - as long as we keep each other alive - we will have centuries to fix the effects of climate change, as much as we possibly can.
And looking at how far we've come in the past two decades alone - in the past five years alone - I genuinely think it is inevitable that we will overcome climate change.
So, we're going to survive climate change, as a species.
What matters now is making sure that every possible individual human survives climate change as well.
What matters now is cutting emissions and reinventing the world as quickly as we possibly can.
What matters now is saving every life and livelihood and way of life that we possibly can.
#hope my reasoning here makes sense#idk I'm just a person who does a lot of research and posting talking about my take on things#I'm not any kind of Real Authority#but still#and for what it's worth the climate and climate transition data I've been following DOES make me confident in this conclusion#I struggled with the line between recognizing the very real damages of climate change#especially on the global south and especially in the last few years#and focusing on the positive instead of regaling you all with depressing situations#especially when there is so much amazing work being done throughout marginalized countries and marginalized groups#literally if rich countries just paid climate reparations and did actual decolonization/landback#a lot of communities could sort out the shit they need to sort out themselves#and/or in alliance and solidarity with each other#or at least most of the things they need to sort out!!#cough anyway#climate change#climate action#climate emergency#climate crisis#global warming#climate solutions#hope#hope posting#not news#me
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Traveller
#artists on tumblr#at it again with the detailed backgrounds#there's something so relaxing about drawing 49285947 leaves#it seems we've kind of skipped the colorful part of autumn here#went straight from summer hot days to winter depression grey#all of my DMs are on hiatus or travelling so no D&D for a couple of weeks#bless them all on their journeys and forays#i hope every DM is having a good day actually#thank u for your service
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I’m curious how binary cant work for admech since day 1. At first, I thought it’s just high speed alternation in frequencies of sounds to denote 0 and 1, just like how computer cable does with voltage. So I wrote a python script to convert natural language to binary code then to sound based on the idea (so that I can curse in binary in ttrpg). However, since the human auditory cortex can only distinguish sound about 20ms apart, the current commonly used binary coding method (Unicode) that requires 8 bits to encode for one letter (16 bits for one character in Mandarin) would make binary cant less efficient than natural language through the bare ear. As a result, binary cant users not only need vocal implants but also auditory implants to receive info (or perhaps cortex implants to decode). Based on these assumptions, binary cant would be able to happen in sound frequencies not perceivable by the original human cochlea so techpriests conversation can be extremely quiet. And more efficiently, just through data cables.
Or it could be the other way around, scientists might develop more efficient binary language without basing it on the symbol system of natural languages (I’m not that familiar with linguistics so I don’t know if this is possible or not).
However, the sound techpriests made in the game mechanicus doesn’t sound like my assumption. There are definitely more than 2 pitches used in the conversations (which makes it less binary...) and they seem to be faster than natural language. I still couldn’t figure out what’s happening here. Do the twisting pitches actually encode more than one bit? Is binary cant actually an analog signal encoding a digital signal? Or is the sound effect just mean to sound better for the game?
The binary curse program (turn the sound on!):
#warhammer 40k#adeptus mechanicus#binary cant#question#I should think about my BDNF & depression paper now but#each time I have a paper due I start to think about every irrelevant thing
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kim yoosung, the man of 1000 hobbies
#this is genuinely brightening my depressive episode#i love my boy ;;-;;#inspired by yoosung talking about his countless school clubs#artists on tumblr#fanart#mystic messenger fanart#mysme fanart#mystic messenger yoosung#mysme yoosung#kim yoosung#otome game#mystic messenger#mysme
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