#but i was also : a bad student when i worked with her
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grison-in-space · 2 days ago
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One of my favorite teaching moments was the time that one of the students in my class (a Classics double major that had long since forgotten that anyone else in Genetics Lab might have humanities interests) snapped the opening lines to another student out in the middle of a play argument. I gasped at him, the other student demanded to know what the first had said, I provided my own translation ("I'll rape you in the ass and mouth, cockslut Aurelius and ass-hungry Marcus") and formally made the point that we do not say shit like this unless we expect to stand by our words when someone unexpectedly understands them. Then we got into a brief argument about whether irrumare is better translated as "to skullfuck" or "to rape one's face" and a much longer discussion about the way that toxic masculinity relates to homosexuality and prescriptive sexual behavior.
For the record, what aetherograph is referring to is actually the Roman verb irrumare itself. It is a violent word, and while all the folks above are right that Romans and Greeks alike had a lot of moral panic surrounding men being the receiving partner of penetrative sex, irrumare is specifically more threatening and insulting than, say, pedicare: you're specifically muting the person and potentially blocking their airways here, making them even more vulnerable. It also implies very strongly that the penetrating person is controlling the movement: this is not a verb that can be translated synonymously to "blowing" a person, for example. The word means to forcibly fuck a person's mouth, an act so degrading that it is beyond imagination that an upstanding man would or could tolerate it without being forced.
These are Bad Words to a Roman, and I think translations should incorporate that as well as trying to convey the violence of the words. I really don't like translations that try to downplay the extent to which Catullus 16 is a very, very vivid rape threat in response to (inferred) loss of masculine status on account of spending too much time and attention with female lovers. I think there is a tendency to be delighted by profanity and obscenity themselves in the hallowed halls of literature, and certainly this is one hell of an ancient Italian poetic tradition that continues well into the modern day. But I also think that obscenity and poetry both exist to turn strong feelings into meaning, and I think Catullus' poetry is most powerful and effective when we stop thinking about how naughtily he was saying something and start thinking about what exactly he was saying as he did it.
Catullus certainly is one of the Roman poets that fucked, but Catullus 16 is not a romantic poem but a violent one. (This isn't that uncommon for Catullus, who writes vividly about sex, emotion, and violence as recurring themes and can be almost as aggressive to women as to men. One of his other famous ones, Catullus 11, involves him feeling spurned by a lover and declaring that his friends Furius and Aurelius should go tell her that he says he hopes she's happy with all her many suitors, her three hundred lovers, none of which she truly touches despite the rupture of their thighs; another (Catullus 58) has him complaining that his lover whom he was so attached to is off lying in the back alleys fucking all the "grandsons of Remus," AKA any Roman who shows up and hikes up his tunic.) He was also very capable of mushy sweetness! But the anger is always there lurking beneath the surface.
He was a complicated guy. His poetry is constructed in careful layers of meaning around astonishingly raw emotions, glittering and artistic to behold. He was absolutely a man of his own time and place, which makes him translator catnip. But that time and place was Imperial Rome, and translators ought to work to communicate exactly what sort of place Rome could be, too.
you cant even begin poems with "i will sodomise and facef uck you" anymore. because of woke .
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jambalaya-enthusiast · 2 days ago
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okay.....inhales...... UNIVERSITY AU!!!!!! Crew members as university professors x student! Reader who has a massive, explosive, crush on them!!!!
💃🏻💃🏻💃🏻
TEACHERS PET— Professor! Crew Members x Student! Reader who has a massive crush on them!
warnings: college! AU, student/teacher relationship dynamics, power dynamics, reader is 18. No NSFW in this one,jimmy being manipulative, the characters being a little inappropriate.
note: y'all want a part 2? I can make one where the reader proposes, and then one with relationship dynamics and how it would play out. angst maybe? Lemme know.
PROF. GRANT CURLY
He would be the professor of data science/and or aerospace engineering, with astrophysics.
Extremely well liked at the University, students and teachers alike look up to him due to his approachable demeanor and calm and respectable nature.
Very responsible as an authoritative figure, in his years of expertise, he's never had a single complaint ever come in from the board or from any student/guardian.
Which is why he basically fell into a dilemma when you one of his top students, started looking at him in a way that he was sure wasn't platonic.
Curly is very strict on keeping his personal and professional life apart.
He tried to convince himself, that it was just a puppy crush and it would soon go away.
But boy oh boy, nothing had prepared him for the day that you snuck into his office in the pretense of asking subject related questions.
He could practically feel your eyes being fixated on him, it didn't help how you were so devastatingly attractive either.
He doesn't wanna risk his career, and your educational prowess.
But God, He doesn't know how he's going to handle this predicament he's gotten himself into.
PROF. JIMMY ZARE
Oh boy. Oh dear.
He's a Psychology Professor fasho.
You've chosen the wrong older man to fall in love, this guy is literally the man LDR sings about.
Sure, he was probably the strictest and sternest professor on campus grounds, but he was also... The sexiest one, and he didn't even hide the fact that he didn't know how many young adults in the institution were practically drooling over him. His rough stud persona.
He never paid them any attention, sure he dropped in flirty smiles and winks every now and then to get the girls weak in their knees, but that all stopped when he laid his eyes on you.
you were this young, bright, cheery and oh so beautiful student, who happened to look at him in a way which he wasn't unfamiliar with.
He knew you were falling, hard.
Normally, he would of just ignored your desperate attempts at getting to know him, telling you off or extreme case just sleep with you to fulfill your desires of extra credits.
But no, you weren't looking at him entirely for lust, oh no no no.
He recognised that you were madly, deeply, in love.
And to him, you just seemed so tempting.
Like an angel whose wings he had to rip apart, a beautiful doll whose innocence he had to taint.
And he isn't quite sure if he's going to pass out on the opportunity.
PROF. ANYA MARINOVA
Psychology/Biology professor.
Extremely sweet, yet extremely stern, like curly, she prefers to keep her work and professional life separate.
She understands body language really well, so she was quick to catch onto your lingering eyes on her.
She acknowledges the fact that having romantic feelings for an authoritative figure is completely normal and part of a normal human psyche.
What she doesn't,is to act upon those feelings.
When she noticed you staying back during classes
She tries to play it coy, not giving you any attention.
But at one point, she begins to question even her morals.
Maybe it's not too bad? Time will tell.
PROF. SWANSEA HAROLD
Definitely the professor of Mechanical Engineering/Computer Engineering.
The typical no-nonsense straight to the point type professor.
Is extremely stern, hence is quite unpopular with the students.
It's a good day if he even acknowledged your existence, let alone engaging in a conversation.
He is quick to call out mistakes, hence if you wanna stand out you have to be a very good student who doesn't make any trouble or aren't inattentive.
He appreciates the students who actually take interest in the material rather than just mug everything up for passing.
But he isn't dumb, he's had his fair share of students crushing on him during his first years on the job.
He knows when a student starts paying too much attention to the guy teaching a boring ass physics formula.
He knows better than to indulge in their fantasies, to give them the delusional idea that something might be possible between the two of you.
But you caught his attention not just for your looks, okay maybe a little bit for your looks. but he'd also noticed how diligent you were as a student.
He's starting to question maybe it won't be too bad, it's been a while since he had some game. and you're both adults, so it should be fine right?
GUEST PROF. DAISUKE JUANEZ
Bro stormed through school and managed to bag the position as a guest lecturer at your college for a mechanical engineering course.
Since he's literally so unbelievably young, he has fangirls and fanboys left and right, and he knows it, he isn't dense.
But he promised himself he won't date any students since he thought they would only see him as a fantasy not someone to genuinely love.
But that was until you came into the picture.
He felt something the moment you locked eyes with him, he saw something in those eyes of yours, staring at him so dreamily.
He knows he's young, and he knows that you're as well, but he also knows that anything inappropriate between the two of you could result in him losing his job and risking even your future.
But he knows how to keep a secret, maybe you can as well?
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wangxianficfinder · 2 days ago
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Fic Finder
Jan 4th
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1. Hello! I'm trying to find what I'm fairly sure was a threadfic, though I could be mistaken. It had single dad wwx dating lwj, but a-yuan hated his dad's new bf, to the point that wwx ended up breaking up with lwj. But then a-yuan felt bad and schemed to get them back together. Thanks!
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2. Hi everyone can someane please tell me the title of one fanfic of modao zu shi i seaching. A long time ago i discovered a fanfic of mo dao zu shi wich containe this infos :The plot vaguely is :after being taken under a curse lan zhan and wei ying spend the night in the cave and see know what they did ~~. Wei ying due to the curse was able to get pregnant and left to hide and raise her child (black hair but golden eyes like her father lan zhan). Wei ying and her child are taken care of by ghosts or a ghost I don't know anymore. After more twists Wei ying died like at the beginning of the original novel. After several years despite all these efforts Lanzhan was not able to call the soul of Wei Ying. Her son who became a little older then worked every day in secret on the dark spells like his mother did and tried to bring his mother back and succeeded etc...please if someone know about the title please tell me i read it in wattpad but today as i didn't know the title and as there are lot of fanfic i couldnt find it. @foxfel
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3. Hello once more! Again thank you for finding the fics. This time there's this fic: WWX doesn't die cause Baoshan Sanren saves him after he throws himself off the cliff and he's tended to by her and Lan yi (who's BS's cultivation partner) and is in coma for 10 years. After waking up he doesn't have his memories and is thus named Genxin(Gengxin?)(he's names sth!) and can finally have the life he was denied as a child for the next 6 years. I also remember he wears beautiful clothes with different colors and cuts and this was the aspect that caught my eye. Also Nie Mingxue if found alive when he joins the mystery solving band. Sooo it'd be good if it can be found since all my search didn't bear fruit @raven-hale
FOUND? Until The End by abCEE (M, 365k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, war changes people, no pinning, LWJ learns how to speak, WWX is not oblivious, Established Relationship, wangxian are married and have a son, Mpreg, Good Uncle LQR, a little grey LWJ, a bit of JC bashing from LWJ, BAMF JYL, 16 years of yearning, Canon-Typical Violence, LSZ is LWJ & WWX's Child, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Canonical Character Death - WWX, Canon Rewrite, Happy Ending, Fix-It of Sorts)
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4. Hi! I'm looking for a fic in where cultivator lwj gets zapped into modern times right in wwx's apartment. He says there for a while before retunifn back to his world to investigate some mysterious illness with lxc. Meanwhile, the Wens destroyed wwx life in the modern world and he got kicked out. Lwj doesn't know what happens to hum when he went back but wex switched places with mo xuanyu in lwj's reality and lwj is trying to piece together what happened to wei Ying as they both investigate the qi disease. There are also no duplicates across both worlds. The Wens run a health company called Wenquish. They were trying to ge Wen Ning on it too.
FOUND? take me back to a time by DizziDreams (T, 143k, WangXian, College/University, Modern with Magic, Time Travel, Sharing a Bed, Fish out of Water, Man Out of Time, WWX questionable decisions, LWJ lizard brain, Angst with a Happy Ending, WWX's lack of self-preservation, Student WWX, Time-Traveling Wizard LWJ, Slow Burn, Character Death, reference to abuse, Canonical Character Death, Canonical Abuse, Canon LWJ, Canon-Typical Violence, Mutual Pining, Chronic Illness, Not A Fix-It, WWX be like "i should be scared but instead im just horny", feat: lwj horny grip, Case Fic, Russian Translation Available, Transmigration, America, Spanish Translation Available, [Podfic of] take me back to a time by dreamhazer)
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5. Hello! Merry Christmas and Happy New Year! I hope you can help me find this one fanfic! Lan Wangji was in a meeting i think and Wei Wuxian was walking around the cloud recessess then the lan juniors or juniors in general decided to follow him around (like little duckling following their mother) thankyou!
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6. Hi! So there was this fic which I remember only reading the summary of, I don't actually start it (I think cause it was a WIP or maybe I didn't like a tag??) but it was basically that WRH had a list of all the future oracles, and the last one on the list was WWX
hi! I'm #6 on the fic finder and id like to add that WWX was the last oracle on the list after WRH(??), so WRH wanted to keep him, I think that was implied
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7. Hi! This is fic finder. Set in modern era. A-yuan lives in orphanage. He and the children there is not treated kindly by the matron (? I dont know what they are called) but a-yuan gets the worse treatment. I think the matron is Wang Lingjiao. And then the Lan comes and wants to adopt him. There are trial time i think for a-yuan to decide if he wants to be adopted or not but in the end he accept. Then the Lan announced that they are searching for someone (WWX). I think its because a-yuan asked them? I dont remember why. And then WWX comes using a bus but when he arrived he saw that a-yuan is happy so he go back. I think Su She who work as security for the lan noticed him and chased WWX away. I think he followed WWX too. After that Su She noticed a pendant that WWX wears and accused him for stealing. Something happen and then WWX lives in the Lan estate. Wangxian falls in love. And then it was revealed that WWX wants to adopt a-yuan but WLJ does something that males WWX cant adopt a-yuan. I dont remember if WWX tells LWJ or he found out that a-yuan is the late WRH grandchild. Thats all i can remembeer. Thanks! @idontknowwhattowriteforusername
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8. I had it bookmarked but can't find it. Please help! Ai remember the fic had wwx in the demon slaughtering cave but it wasn't a real cave it was modern au I think and he snuck into the demon slaughtering cave for comfort i think i don't fully remember?
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9. Hello! For fic finder: modern setting, wei ying didnt know about aftercare, so after hooking up with lan zhan he gets confused by his dom trying to take care of him and tries to leave, confusing lan zhan in turn. wen qing had been looking out for him after his hook ups previously. despite not usually hooking up with the same person more than once, he keeps seeing lan zhan. wei ying is scared of being too clingy, but lan zhan explains the concept of aftercare, leading to wei ying wondering why his previous doms never bothered and if he had done something wrong, which lan zhan refutes. they end up deciding to date.
FOUND! try a little tenderness by ilip13 (E, 11k, WangXian, Modern AU, BDSM, Dom/sub, Aftercare, Subdrop, Reference to bad BDSM etiquette in wwx’s past, Reference to wwx’s self-worth issues, Cuddling & Snuggling, Getting Together, Little bit of miscommunication in the beginning but they get better at it, Blow Jobs, Masturbation, Reference to BDSM scenes)
NOT FOUND! like it's the only thing i'll ever do by quothhh (M, 5k, WangXian, WWX/Other (Offscreen), Modern AU, Pre-Relationship, Aftercare, Sub Drop, Pining)
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10. Hello! A good while ago I read a fanfic (modern au) in which wwx had a depressive episode in which he couldn't even get out of bed, I haven't been able to find if and I was wondering if lt sounded familiar to anyone? ♡ @menimimimeni
Hi! I'm #10 in the last fic finder, unfortunately that wasn't the fic I was talking about 😞, that said I read it and it was very lovely
On another note I think it might have been an arranged marriage au, however I'm not sure, what I'm sure of is that lwj was really worried about wwx
NOT FOUND!🔒your heart is mine to fortify by sunflowersfield (G, 2k, WangXian, Modern AU, Bakery AU, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Neurodiversity, Anxiety, Insomnia, Falling In Love, Getting Together, Happy Ending, Sharing a Bed, Pining, Mutual Pining, Strangers to Lovers, Friends to Lovers, Domestic Fluff, Slice of Life)
FOUND? Polishing Jade by Starra (M, 252k, WangXian, Arranged Marriage, Modern AU, Awkward Dates, Slice of Life, Most likely OOCness, Falling In Love, Everyone Needs A Hug, Loneliness, Feelings Realization, Drinking to Cope, Implied/Referenced Abuse, Angst with a Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Suicide, slow-ish build, Might not be slow enough for some people my bad, The real Slow Build is how long it takes for them to actually get married, Eventual Cohabitation)
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11. Can you help me find s fic that was i think a/b/o, but im not quite sure, and it was a mafia au and wwx was pregnant?
FOUND? Baby, You Ain't Seen Nothing Yet by TriviasFolly (E, 177k, WangXian, A/B/O Dynamics, Alpha LWJ, Omega WWX, Omega LSZ, Mafia AU, Modern AU, Sects are Clans, Feral WWX, Feral Omegas, Nurse WWX, Dark LWJ, Dark WWX, Possessive Behavior, Possessive LWJ, feminine WWX, wwx's cannon desire to be a sugar baby/trophy wife, Breeding Kink, Mpreg)
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12. Hello! Good morning/afternoon/evening! I'm asking for fic finder :D Looking for the fic where the entire nie sect traveled back in time except for Nie Mingjue and he's very much confuse on why everyone is treating him differently. specific scenes like the cooks preparing his favorite meals, his cousins/nie disciples taking turns to guard him
thank you!!
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13. Hi! I'm a big fan of your work. Thank you for compiling lists of recs and finding fics!
I've been looking for a specific cannon divergent fic. I remember everything mostly going the same up until the end of the Sunshot campaign.
For some reason, the wens aren't killed off. A new original character is put in charge. Either NHS, WWX or JZX thinks something is up with the new wen clan leader an sect leader Jin.
For some reason WWX ends up in cloud recesses. Marriage or healing?
There are also two memorable sect conferences in the story where JGS uses demonic cultivation (either WWX's work or help from the new wen sect) to control people. The first one is used to upset the sect leader's and get them angry. WWX finds out about this one and tells people. For the most part it backfires, and JGS tries to blame it on him then uses someone else as a scapegoat. JYL is pregnant with JL, and the array makes her feel sick and leave. I don't think NMJ was affected though.
The second time, an array is hidden in JGS bedroom and is like some kind of aphrodisiac/compulsion array for JGS to assault some young woman.
In the end, JGS next victim kills him publicly and the Jin and Wen sects are exposed. Wen Qing is the next Wen leader and the Jin sect has a lot of restructuring to do. @hopesteapot-blog
FOUND? Back To The River (So Learn To Swim) by kalany (M, 83k, CSSR/WCZ/JFM/YZY, XuanLi, WangXian, Fix-it fic, self-reincarnation, autotransmigration, time travel adjacent Pregnancy, access to appropriate obstetrics care, Childbirth, Unplanned Pregnancy, Polyamory, Polygamy, survival sex, unwanted pregnancy ending in termination, on-page death of a child, Murder of a Child, non-explicit discussion of sexual assault, Sexual Coercion, brief glimpse of sexual assault, Canon-Typical Violence, Canon-Typical Sexism, background asexual JC, bisexual JFM, bisexual YZY, Bisexual CSSR, bisexual WCZ, Sect Heir JYL) the conference stuff is from this fic
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14. Hi! This is a request for a 3-Jun centric fic. Really hoping you will find it...
It’ set with Meng Yao and Nie Mingjue as assassins, working under Jun Guangshan and Wen Ruohan respectively. Lan Xichen is a teacher in some kind of a politically cordoned off sensitive place and holds the secret to access the Yiling patriarch through his brother, LWJ. MY NMJ get assigned to LXC, being forced to work together to get their hands on some weapon or something… WWX is rumoured to be dead, but actually is the elusive Yiling patriarch, secretly working for the Jiang siblings. It is a complete story, and sooooo good and I wanna reread it, but i cant find it 🥲
Thanks so much!!!
FOUND? The Man From Y.I.L.I.N.G. by Eleanor_Fenyx, little-smartass (Linxcat) (M, 123k, 3zun, WangXian, JYL/JZX, JC & WWX & JYL, The Man From U.N.C.L.E AU, Spies & Secret Agents, Modern, but make it mid-1960's cold war China, JGS's A+ Parenting, The homoeroticism of falling in love with your mark, and also your unwanted mission partner who irritates the shit out of you)
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15. Hello i'm looking for a fic where lwj was an emperor, the kingdom held a concubine selection and wwx was forced to participate by yu ziyuan, and unfortunate for him he was chosen. The wen siblings became his servants. In the fic i think he tried to be kicked out of the palace/harem but emperor lwj was quit smitten,and i think lwj already knew wwx, but wwx didn't know him. In one of the scenes lwj found out that he got treated poorly from the other servant/concubines, and wangxian where intimate real fast. @ahiku-chan
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16. happy new year, mods! looking for a fic: I'm not sure if it might have been in a modern setting, but it's one where there are multiple versions of wwx from the past, including a child, that the present wwx buries in his garden and has to kill (?) over and over. lwj initially doesn't know but eventually finds out about this secret. thank you! @potatokunst
FOUND! Howling by MimiSpearmint (E, 40k, WangXian, Modern with Magic, Mortal Instruments Fusion, Horror, Eldritch, Domestic Fluff, Single Parent WWX, Witchcraft, Getting Together, shifter!lwj, yllz!wwx, Intercrural Sex, Hand Jobs, Angst with a Happy Ending, Switch WangXian, a bit of a degradation kink, anti-STI sex talismans, Anal Sex, Oral Sex)
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17. hello, I'm looking for a fic where a young LWJ meets his older self multiple times during the canon timeline. The first time the younger LWJ sees him, it is around the time of the cloud recesses study arc, and he mistakes his older self to be his father. He has multiple conversations with his older self. Thank you as always for your help! @classygreydove
FOUND? 花无百日红; the flower that withers by yiqie (M, 29k, WangXian, Time Travel, Fix-It of Sorts, Case Fic, Spells & Enchantments, Hurt/Comfort, Forgiveness, It’s about the emotional catharsis, If you have ever laughed at WWX clowning himself for the 'no one will marry you’ scene, This fic is: for you) I’m pretty sure 17 is the flower that withers, it’s from adult LWJ’s perspective, but the description otherwise feels right.
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18. Hi I’m looking for this fic where lan wangji and Wei wuxian are already together post canon. Wwx is messing around with his talismans and accidentally curses lan zhan to kill him. The rest of the fic (3-4chapter I think) is wwx trying to undo the curse and lan zhan trying to kill him. There’s an explicit scene and wwx uses that as a distraction to escape and there’s a river I think?? Anyway thank you!!
FOUND? all the broken things that I made by ilip13 (E, 43k, WangXian, Post-Canon Established Relationship, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Lovers To Enemies, (then back to lovers I'm not a monster), Dubcon Kissing, Dubious Consent, But mostly not in the way you might expect - see notes for details, Explicit Sexual Content, Bondage, Flirting, Competence Kink)
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19. Searching for a fic that I read a along time ago on archive and any help in locating would be appreciated.
Wei Yings a god and he meets kid Lan Zhan one night. He drops some sort of Wen artifact that helps Lan Zhan save Gusu when the Wens attacked. Wei Ying is punished and doesnt see LanZhan for a long time. Next time they see each other Lan Zhan is grown and Wei Ying fondly calls Lan Zhan his little light bearer. Lan Zhan falls in love but Wei Ying does not understand human feelings. Push and tug, Wei Ying seals with powers as a god within bells to experience human emotions. Cant remember anymore details. Any help is appreciated @katwkay
NOT FOUND! Flaming Gentians by Honey_and_Chocolate (T, 28k, WangXian, WIP, Immortal WWX, Fox WWX, Dragon LWJ, Older WWX, Younger LWJ, Child LWJ, Burial Mounds, Attractive WWX, YLLZ WWX, Soulmates, Self-Indulgent, Fluff and Humor, WWX likes to wear accessories, earrings mainly, WWX has been friends with almost every important figure of the cultivation world, presumed engagement, heaven is just another world, one that WWX has made scared shitless of him for eternity)
FOUND! classygreydove: 19 is "Lying on the Edge of a Star" I'm pretty sure. It was a fic I also asked wangxianficfinder to find and later discovered the fic was moved to a hidden collection. I spent a lot of time tracking a copy of it down using wayfinder/internet archive. @/katwkay if u want the pdf of the fic feel free to dm me
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20. Happy new year buddy!
A) Can you help me find a fic where WWX comes back alive (looking like a hobo. I think he was in his original body) and learns that people are competing to marry LWJ. He receives proposals from various sects including an older woman I think..
Obviously none would win. I think WWX wins against all of them (lookin like a hobo).
B) There is a similar fic where people trying to defeat LWJ so that they can marry him. There was a instance where both of them where walking and a man outta nowhere came and have a sword fight with LWJ much to WWX's chargin.
.
I'm not sure if both of the above fic are the same....😅 @grrumpywoof
20B)
FOUND? dream of a funeral; hear of a marriage by defractum (nyargles) (T, 36k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Happy Ending, Domestic Fluff, First Time, Fluff and Humor)
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axolotl4days · 1 day ago
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Batman Dead Daughter AU part 2
I'm so sorry this took so long, I ment to post this like the day after the first one but I kept getting distracted and didn't have time to write it TwT
Anyways-
We are starting off with Damian after patrol and approaching Bruce
I also realized how my writing is a lot closer to script in the last one, especially with the dialog, and it's something I'll work on
Without further a due: Angst :D
Damian POV:
'This is really unordinary, first a new student in the middle of the year, who looks... similar to Father, but now she's hiding under a bridge? What is going on with that girl. Somethings not right, it's clear there's something she's not telling me, I should be angry, she could be some sort of threat. So why am i not? This isn't anger its.. something else. What even is this feeling? I feel like I know her. One things for certain, she needs help. Maybe I should speak to Father about this. He does have a habit of adopting children.' Damian thinks to himself as he removes his vigilante gear, he decides to approach Bruce and bring up his concerns
"Father." Damian says, commanding his attention away from the computer
"Damian. Is something wrong?" Bruce asks
"I'm not sure, it's about my new friend" Damian says
"Ah yes.... y/n correct?" Bruce asks but his voice waivers as he says her name
"Correct, father. I believe y/n may be in trouble of some kind. As you know she joined the school at an odd time, which is weird enough as it is. However, during patrol, I found her under a bridge. She claimed that she couldn't go home but wouldn't say why. And to make matters even more confusing, she didn't seem to know who I was." Damian explains
"What do you mean? Like she didn't know what a vigilante was? It's possible if she's new to Gotham, unlikely but possible." Bruce says
"No, she wasn't suprised, or confused, she acted as if meeting a vigilante were normal, but she didn't know my name, she seemed to know about vigilantes, but didn't know which one I was." He explained while gesturing to the cases of costumes throughout the years. "She also didn't have anything with her. When I found her, she only had her backpack with school supplies and a few clothes. No blankets or food items, nor any personal belongings. It seems like she hasn't been here for very long, but she's been attending school for a few weeks now." Damian says
Bruce pauses for a moment "That's... odd. Even if someone had recently become homeless, they would have more than just school supplies, especially if they've been living outside." Bruce says mostly to himself before turning back to his son "What are you thinking Damian?" Bruce asks
Damian remains silent for a while before responding, "With your permission, Father, I would like to invite her over after school tomorrow. Perhaps we could learn more then. I heard it's supposed to rain tomorrow as well, and I'd feel bad knowing my friend was out there getting sick." Damian states and waits for a response
"I see. Very well then, you may invite her over, I'll inform Alfred so he will make extra for dinner." Bruce says, calling Alfred in. "In the meantime, you need to turn in for the night, I'll speak with Alfred about tomorrow"
"Very well, goodnight father." Damian says, walking past Alfred
Bruce POV:
"Master Bruce? Are you alright?" Alfred asks having heard the conversation
Bruce doesn't speak for a moment, but eventually, he turns to face the loyal butler
"Alfred I... I don't want to get my hopes up. I know that it's probably just a coincidence, but... when you pick the two of them up tomorrow, I want you to call me immediately and let me know if it... if it's possible.. if it could be -"
"I will Master Bruce. I promise that the moment I am able to confirm, I will let you know." Alfred says
"Thank you Alfred." Bruce says, as he unlocks one of the drawers in his desk, and he pulls own a dusty photo and cleans it, the photo being a photo of him, and his long lost daughter smiling eating icecream
"I know it's... highly unlikely, but would you like me to prepare her favorite? Even if it's not her, I know that you enjoy the meal as well, and it's been awhile, it'd be nice to relive the good memories." Alfred suggests
"That... that would be nice Alfred, thank you." Bruce says before looking at the photo again and putting it away
The next day:
Damian was right, it is raining and by the looks of it, it'll be raining all day, the day begins the same as normal with Damian getting prepared for school, and packing a larger umbrella with him before heading down to breakfast where he finds two of his older brothers
Damian POV:
"Grayson, Drake" Damian greets them
"Hey kid, you got everything you need? It's raining cats and dogs out there" Dick says causing Damian to roll his eyes
"I'm well aware Grayson, I already knew this would happen so I prepared accordingly, even grabbing a larger umbrella to fit us" Damian replies
"Us? Who's us? We aren't going out today" Tim asks
"Us, as in me and my friend, I'm bringing her here after school today. I've already informed Father and Alfred. You two better not freak her out." Damian warns
"Woah, you're bringing a friend home? That's new" Dick says
"You have friends? Like. Real friends? From school?" Tim laughs
"Yes I have friends. What's with the laughter. And whats real friends supposed to mean" Damian snaps
"Well, considering your always calling people peasants it's surprising, not to mention it's someone who's not like us." Tim replies as if it's common knowledge
"What is that supposed to mean. Y/n doesn't have to be like us. We're friends, and that's that. Honestly, we're practically siblings. That's what the people at school say." Damian says. "Oh, and for your information, she may be in a tough situation right now. I don't yet know the details, but something is up, so when she gets here, you guys better not say anything suspicious, got it?" Damian basically orders before he walks away to head to school.
"Y/n? Huh..." Dick mutters to himself
"What is it? You know this person?" Tim asks
"No no it's just... I swear I've heard that name before." Dick says almost serious
At school, y/n pov:
'Okay, y/n, there's no need to panic just yet. No one's said anything, so he didn't tell anyone. What do I say if he brings it up? It happened while in the suit, so he probably won't approach it as himself, but what if he does? Or if he asks me about home? What do I do if he asks me about my parents? I need to think of a plan. Dad always has plans, but what do I even do? I can't just go up to the manor and explain who I am. It's been..' y/n pauses to do math but fails 'it's been an unknown amount of years, it's possible more things have changed than what I can tell. It's possible they won't even remember me, or they could think I was some sort of clone like in a Sci fi movie. I don't know anything for certain yet, so I have to play it safe... even if it hurts'
Y/n braces herself, thoughts of things that could go wrong still swirling about in her mind, but she can't think about that now, she has classes to attend.
Damian arrives to class and greets her like normal, she holds back her sigh of relief knowing that it's probably because it was 'Robin' that she talked to last night, she's seen her dad shift between personas before and if he learned from him then he won't mention a thing about what happened.
The two start talking about homework, which y/n suddenly realizes she didn't do, but before she can worry about it, the teacher speaks up
"Good morning class, today's going to be a bit different as we're starting a new project and for this you'll need to work in pairs, so before anything, everyone needs to go around and get into pairs and then when that's done I'll start handing out information on the project and explain what it is."
"Y/n? Would you like to work on this project together?" Damian asks
"Sure, we work together on some stuff already so this should be a peice of cake" y/n replies
"Perfect, we can work on it at my place after school as well, speaking of which, would you like to come over today? It's Friday, and I was thinking we could have a uh... sleepover. There's lots of stuff we could do, and it'll be easier to find time for the project that way and you could stay for the whole weekend" Damian asks, hoping to convince his friend without sounding weird. But he can't stand the idea of her being outside all weekend, especially with Gothams weather.
"Oh! Sure I would love to come over for a sleep over it sounds like a lotta fun!" Y/n replies, trying to hold back her excitement 'oh my god this works out perfectly. Now I can see what's changed, maybe I can talk to dad, I hope he's okay, this'll let me find out if he remembers me or not. I'll finally have Alfred's cooking again!' Y/n thinks to herself
"Good good, I'll have our bulter Pennyworth pick us up straight after school. We have a library in the manor so we don't need to use the schools library, oh and just a warning, my brothers are probably going to be at the manor as well, just ignore them, they're fools." Damian says
'There's more of them?!' Y/n thinks to herself, trying to hide her shock, but Damian notices anyways but he doesn't say anything about it.
"Alright class, now that everyone is partnered up I'll explain the project, this one will take a few weeks so listen up" the teacher says, gathering everyone's attention and explains the project
They spend the rest of class working on the project, writing notes, and during breaks they talk about what they're going to do at the manor, Damian discovers y/n knows even less movies than he does so they decide they could have a movie marathon when they first get there.
Before they know it, school is over and it's time to head out. Just as Damian said, Alfred comes to pick them up right after school, and parks somewhere where the rain isn't as intense.
"Hello Pennyworth, this is Y/n." Damian introduces the two noticing the pale look on Alfred's face just like he had when he first mentioned Y/n
"Hello, thank you for picking us up Alfred!" Y/n says, happy to see Alfred again after all this time, though a bit shocked to see how white his hair has gotten, but otherwise he looks the same. She too sees the pale in his face, but is still too nervous to say anything.
"Of course miss Y/n" He says, while getting into the car "If you'll excuse me, I have a phone call to make while we head to the manor, so I'll put the sound dividers up, in the mean time the two of you can pick what music you wish to listen to during the drive" Alfred says
"Alright, here y/n, we can listen to almost any song with this" Damian says
As the two begin to look through the music, Alfred sinks into the sea as he processes what he's seen. Could it really be Y/n?
Alfred pov:
He takes a moment to compose himself, he has a cold sweat, but he calms himself and calls Bruce
The phone feels like it rings forever before Bruce answers
"Hello Alfred, any news?" Bruce asks, for he was waiting for this call ever since Alfred left
"It's her Master Bruce. It has to be. She looks exactly the same as she did before. She sounds the same, too, I froze for a moment, but neither of them addressed it." Alfred says
"Are you sure? Did she say anything?" Bruce asks
"She didn't say much. However, when Damian introduced us, he referred to me as Pennyworth as he always does, yet Y/n referred to me as Alfred, regardless. Her eyes were unmistakable, even if it were someone who looked like her, those eyes, I would never forget them." Alfred says
"I see. Come get me once you arrive at the manor, we need to discuss how were going to go about this, see what she knows and confirm everything for sure." Bruce replies
"Of course Master Bruce, we'll be their shortly" Alfred informs him
The drive passes quickly and they arrive at the manor, quickly getting in as the rain pours harder and harder. Alfred takes their umbrellas and coats
"Alright, I have some business to attend to, but I shall make dinner shortly. Feel free to do whatever you wish in the meantime, but stick together, wouldn't want anyone to get lost." Alfred says side eyeing Y/n
"No need to worry, Pennyworth. I've memorized the layout of the manor. We will be heading to the theater first, you may find us there when dinner is ready." Damian states
"Wow, you weren't kidding, you actually brought a friend," two voices call out, causing Damian to scowl
"Grayson, Drake." Damian turns to the approaching duo."Y/n, these are my older brothers and nuecences. Who have apparently decided to bother us." Damian says
"Awe, don't be like that, Dames. we just wanna meet our baby brothers new... friend, " Dick says, meeting Y/n's gaze "Anyways- the names Dick Grayson, pleasure to meet you" he introduces himself before elbowing the boy next to him to stop his stareing
"Ow- oh uh, I'm Tim Drake. Sorry about Dick, it's not every day we meet a friend of the demons. Are you guys going to be working on something?" Tim asks
"Oh well, technically, we have a school project, but we have plenty of time to work on it, so we were going to have a um, 'movie marathon'" Y/n replies, unsure of how to react
"Yes, we plan to binge some movies that neither of us have seen before, I also wrote a list of other activities we could do, including but not limited to, various board games" Damian replies
"Wow, sounds like fun, maybe we'll pop in for a movie or two later on" Dick teases
"Grayson-" Damian hisses before being interupted
"Ahem, boys play nice, Master Dick and Master Tim, dinner will be ready in a few hours, I have some matters to attend to with Master Bruce, so please behave yourselves." Alfred states
"Alright, alright, we'll let the two of you go have fun, but don't think we won't drop by for some family board games." Dick says
Groaning, Damian leads Y/n towards the theater while Alfred heads to Bruce's office, leaving Dick and Tim alone
"...... So I'm not the only one who noticed she looks exactly like Bruce, right?" Dick asks
"No, no, you were not. How is this even possible she looks like she's Damian's age, so it's not like Bruce had another affair? But she looks so much like him it's kind of creepy, it could be another clone situation." Tim replies
"Makes Damians little comment about them being siblings earlier seem like it may not have been a joke" Dick says
"He didn't say anything about it, though. You'd think he'd have made all sorts of blood siblings comments by now." Tim says
"Yeah..." Dick says absentmindedly
"You good Dick?? You look like your thinking which is never a good thing" Tim jokes
"Ha ha, very funny. I'm fine. I was just. I feel like I've heard the name Y/n before but can't remember where, " Dick explains, and the two of them stand there for a moment before deciding to actually join movie night
With Alfred:
"Master Bruce?" Alfred approaches the office and lets himself in, noticing the papers all over the place, recognizing all of them
"Is it really possible? Even if it is her, how hasn't she grown up? She'd have been older than Dick by now. And if it is her, why didn't she come back? Why did it take until Damian invited her over for her to come here? Are we sure she even remembers us? What if it's some sick joke? What if some villain made a clone of her and sent her here to toy with me? What if -"
Before he could spiral any further, Alfred cuts him off
"Master Bruce. Calm down. I'm aware of how... odd this situation is, and there is much to discuss. However, I feel it would be best for you to speak to her yourself. I'm sure there's a reasonable explanation for all of this. She is her father's daughter, I'm sure she'll explain everything." Alfred says
"And what if she can't? What if it isn't really her and just a huge coincidence? What then? We would be back at Square one not knowing what happened to her or where to find her or-"
"You're doing it again Master Bruce. Please, go talk to her" Alfred says
"Alfred I- I don't know if I can. If I can face her. It's been so long I.." Bruce, finally looking away from his papers to look up at his butler
"It'll be okay. I'll be there with you as well. You... you don't have to see her just yet. You could wait for then to finish with a few of their movies and settle in before approaching. It'll give you some time to brace yourself as well." Alfred suggests
"That.. sounds like a plan Alfred, thank you." Bruce says
"Of course Master Bruce. I'll go ahead and start dinner now, it shouldnt take too long, so I'll fetch you when it's done, and we can go talk to her. And then have dinner afterward," Alfred replies
"Alright Alfred." Bruce says
After some time passes, the kids have watched around two and a half movies, they're in the middle of third when they hear footsteps approaching
Y/n Pov:
Y/n slightly tenses up. She knows those footsteps, even through the sound of the movie, she can hear them. Her father always taught her to notice the little things like that. The boys notice but don't think much of it until
"Ah, there you all are, Alfred told me you guys would be in here," Bruce's voice calls out as he walks over the greet the others, he looks more tense than usual, but he has been for the past few days it's probably case related the boys think
"Hello father, this is my friend y/n" Damian turns to look at Bruce who after making his way over to everyone finally lays his eyes on y/n, and he freezes
Dick and Tim don't say anything, both looking back and forth between Bruce and Y/n wide eyes, there is a long awkward silence before Damian decides to speak up
"Alright, what is with everyone today! I swear you have all been acting strange. It's not even that rare for me to have friends. If I knew you'd all act like this, I would've thought twice. Even you father, I can't believe it -" Damian starts to scold, but Y/n cuts him off
"It's okay, Damian, cut him some slack, it's not every day a dad sees his dead daughter again" Y/n says while putting a hand on Damians shoulder with wet eyes
"It really is you, Y/n..." Bruce says, tears forming in his eyes
"Hey, Dad... I'm back, I'm sorry I didn't say anything sooner, and I know you probably have a lot of questions, but -" Before y/n can continue, Bruce pulls her into a hug, and the two let out their tears
The others can only stand there and watch as the two cry and apologize to another
"So, I'm all for new family members but what the hell is happening right now can anyone explain" Dick asks
"I agree with Grayson for once, what is going on?" Damian adds
"It's... a long story that we can discuss later. First things first." Bruce stands up but doesn't let go of Y/n almost like he's worried if he let's her go she'll disappear again."Right now, all that matters is that it's time for dinner. Alfred made your favorite Y/n, we weren't sure if it was really you but we wanted to hope it was." Bruce says and they all head to the dining room, still all in shock
They sit at the dinner table and-
"Wow Bruce, another kid? You seriously have a problem." A voice calls out causing the others to look at him and try to signal that it's not the time to say stuff like that
"Hello Jason, it's good to see you too. And for your information, this is Y/n, and technically, she was my first kid, " Bruce says. "Are you here for dinner?"
"Yeah, I wanted some of Alfred's cooking- hold on. What do you mean she's your first kid she's like the same age as the demon spawn??" Jason acts
"Oh that's because I was dead for- ..... uh dad how long was I dead for? I didn't do the math" Y/n says
"It's been... 20 years now" Bruce says hesitantly and watches the realization set in in everyone's eyes
"Oh... wow... that's a lot longer than I thought... but yeah, I've been dead for a while. I only came back to life earlier this month... Also, dad, I know we'll do questions later, but I don't actually know how I came back to life, I was completely alone when I woke up, and I wasn't where I died." Y/n tells him
"I see. That's alright, my dear, we can worry about that later, Damian told me about where you were staying after he found you during patrol, so I'm sure you're hungry" Bruce says
"Father! "Bruce!" The boys yell
"What?" He turns around confused
"Pft wow bruce" Jason laughs only causing Bruce to look even more confused
"Dad I think they're talking about the fact you mentioned patrol" Y/n tells her father while giggling
"Oh, guys, y/n already knows. Well, she knew about me and knowing my daughter she put two and two together when she saw Damian as Robin" Bruce explains
"Yeah, the moment I heard about there being more vigilantes and that apparently dad had more kids, I figured he started a family business, speaking of which dad how many kids did you have after me??? Did you lean into the 'Brucie' persona that much?" Y/n asks, nudging her father
"Okay, in my defense, most of them are adopted. You and Damian are my only biological children, and technically.... these aren't the only ones there's a few more, but they're out right now. Technically Dick and Jason don't live here anymore. They come here for Alfred's cooking most of the time, " Bruce says and almost as if on que y/n's stomach growls, "Speaking of which, it sounds like it's time to eat."
They finally settle at the dinner table, and Alfred brings out the food, y/n practically drools at the smell alone
They eat, and none of them say anything, but they all notice y/n crying while eating the food, and they wonder what she's been through in the month since she woke up before coming here. Bruce and Alfred especially make mental notes to do a health check-up and get her back onto a proper and healthy diet once she's settled back in. Alfred has many mixed feelings seeing y/n eat. She eats much faster than she used to. Jason notices this also and knows what it's like trying to find food on your own as a kid. He not so subtly gives her some of his food.
After dinner and desert (Alfred was so relieved to hear it really was her, he made cookies to celebrate)
Y/n starts to look really tired
"Are you alright sweetheart?" Bruce asks
"I'm okay, dad, just stuffed. It's been a while since I've eaten that much. I'm probably going to have a food coma - that was a joke. I'm not actually going to fall into a coma. " She quickly adds, knowing how much her dad overthinking things
"Well, food coma or not, it's been a long day, I think it's time for you to head to bed." Bruce says, standing up
"Aw, dad already? We haven't even gotten to talk, and I know you have questions, and I do too, and" Y/n starts
"Sweetheart." Bruce says firmly but warm as he crouches down to meet his daughters eyes. "You're right. There are many questions, but those questions can wait. You need your rest. As much as I want to know everything, I want to make sure you're okay first. We can talk in the morning, and the day after, and so on. Your home now." Bruce says
"Yeah... I'm home now." Y/n says, as she starts to cry again and Bruce gently scoops her up in his arms
"It's okay, sweetheart." He says cooing
"I missed you so much, dad." y/n cries
"I missed you too." Bruce says, "Let's get you to bed, I'm sure you've missed your room too. " He starts to walk through the halls while the others are still sitting at the table stunned
"You still have my room?" Y/n asks as Bruce carries her
"What kind of question is that? Of course I still have your room." Bruce replies
"Well... it's been so long, and you probably knew I was dead so I figured-"
"I never accepted you were dead." Bruce cuts her off. "I always hoped I would find you one day. Even if you were a grown adult, I kept your room the same." Bruce says
"Dad..." Y/n says, knowing that this whole time, her father has been looking for a daughter that he would never find "I... I *was* dead... I'm sorry-"
"Don't you dare apologize. Your only a kid it isn't your fault. Whatever happened wasn't your fault. We can talk about it more in the morning. But for now.." Bruce takes out his keys and unlocks the door to Y/n's room and tucks her in. She yawns and Bruce starts to get up but Y/n grabs him
"Dad... could you stay with me until I fall asleep? I know you have work to do and that those guys are probably waiting but-" y/n pauses
"Of course I will. Just rest now my dear." Bruce says and it's not long before y/n is out like a light
Bruce after a few more minutes finally gets up, he plugs in a nightlight and makes his way back to the dining room where he is then greeted by the boys and he sighs
"Boys."
"Bruce" "Father
"Alright. I suppose it's time to explain." Bruce starts as he pulls out a chair "Where do I even begin?"
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Aaaaaaaand another cliffhanger! Sorry not sorry but I've been working on and off on this post for weeks I think. Theres still a good bit of story left (aka the explanations) I don't currently have much planned afterwards but I feel like when I write the next part depending on how I write it this may become a mini series (I say mini because again, I don't have much planned this started out as a random concept in my head) if i do write more after the explanations I'd definitely lean even more into the yandere aspects (I attempted to start planting some seeds of it with the batfam getting more concerned and protective, and the next part will definitely tip them over the edge :) hehe )
I'm sorry if the characters are well, out of character but, *points to the fact I'm new to this fandom and new to writing fanfiction in general*
Also I'm sorry there's no cass, duke, barb, or steph
I don't know much about them yet, I know who they are but not really how they act or solid personality traits so I don't know how to write them yet, but I'll probably allude to them or say that the others explain the situation to them or smth
Thanks for being patient with me for this part lol
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the-mountain-flower · 19 hours ago
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Adding a personal anecdote for emphasis:
For context: I'm from the USA (unfortunately). One of the stereotypical "get rich by doing this" jobs is a doctor, right? Well it's not exactly the case in reality bc the pay really depends on the field and how much the business ppl think they can get away with and also student loans for med school. But one of my moms is a doctor. A really good one, and is actually pretty well-respected in her field, having definitely made a name for herself. My parents are, in the context of being working-class people where literally every single one of the family is disabled (which is damn expensive!), somewhat rich (upper-middle class). Especially in contrast to when Dr. Mom was in med school, with four children (three of whom were known to be disabled), and a dog, and moving several times. Trust me when I say money very tight for a large portion of my childhood (also big props to Mom for being pretty damn good at managing those finances. As well as, well, everything).
Now remember that as I tell you about how that went for our latest move. For various reasons I shan't get into, one of us had to move a year before the rest of us. So for about a year, my parents were managing the expenses of two houses. One of which is in one of the most expensive places to live in the country. While definitely not as bad as when Dr. Mom was in med school, money was pretty tight again. It affected our living options way more than it did before the move.
Now, consider how much money would need to be hoarded for, say, three houses. Or, two mansions and a vacation house. Or four houses and two yachts. Or all of the above and full fancy-ass housekeeping staff.
Now consider how much money would need to be hoarded in order to have all this, and have it not even make a dent in your bank account. To have all of that, and still have more money than any human could possibly spend in their lifetime.
That's absurd, right? Well guess what? That's what billionaires do.
Meanwhile an inconceivable amount of people suffer and die every day because they can't afford groceries. Much less shelter, or healthcare, or the amount of money needed to bribe politicians to pass laws that make it legal to suck every single extra penny out of everyone with less money than you.
Thought: I do NOT think that 50% of the world’s billionaires should be women. I think there shouldn’t be any billionaires at all.
So you are saying 0% of the world should be billionaires?
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taniahylian · 2 days ago
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Ms. Grace: a Foundation spy
Okay, buckle up because this is a wild theory, which was sparked by just a single word, but it's backed up by a lot of facts, so let's dive into it, shall we?
First of, left's look at the description of an event that will become available next patch: Phototaxis in study.
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You see it, don't you? Now, let's first remember that we, as the player, see everything through Vertin's eyes. As such, if someone named "Moth" sent intel to us, they're likely affiliated with the Foundation in one way or another.
Moth is likely a codename, however, and not the character's actual name. Why? Because we have already seen a character associated with moths, and her name is Ms. Grace, and she's a spy.
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Quite a lot of moths in her design, right? Seems rather intentional. Not to mention that, when she's disguised as Kayla, the only difference between them, aside from the eye color, is that Grace has a moth pattern on her bandana.
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Not to mention that, when Vertin encounters Grace for the first time, an odd detail is mentioned; a white moth landing on the flowers Grace was holding.
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Okay, so we've stablished that Grace is heavily associated with moths, but how do we know she's a Foundation spy that infiltrated Manus Vindictae? Very simple; a trail found in this event.
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First we see this report from Andreas Sylvester who, if you remember, is a low-ranking Zeno soldier that was left behind at the abandoned Texas facility. As such, he is unlikely to be privy to classified information and, although he does in fact seem to know that Grace is a spy, he came to the rather logical conclusion that she's a Manus Vindictae spy that was sent to report to them about Zeno's activity in Texas. However, Constantine's response is very suspicious.
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She recommends him to not interfere with Ms. Grace's work, likely because she knows Grace is actually a Foundation spy, carrying out her orders, rather than an actual Manus member.
Also, if Ms. Grace is a spy, that would explain why she was using transformation rituals; she needed to change her appearence into someone the Manus would have no knowledge of (since she's likely a high-ranking Investigator, the Manus probably already knew her original appearence), so she picked a random country girl (Kayla) to change into her, and ended up accidentally trapping her in a mirror in the process... or perhaps it wasn't accidental at all; after all, it'd be very bad if the Manus ever met the real Kayla.
Let's also not forget that, according to Vertin, the Foundation teaches this particular transformation array to their SPDM students, which furthers the connection even more.
There's also what happens at the end of Anjo Nala's trailer. If you need a refresher, after the Manus members give Anjo order after order, she snaps and kills them... but here's the thing: Anjo physically can't disobey the commands given to her by the seal, and she also can't even touch her master, much less harm them. So how could she kill the Manus members? ... Unless she was ordered to.
And who was holding Anjo's seal during that scene?
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Ms. Grace, of course. She's also the one who says the final line in the trailer, in the format of some sort of report: "Towards the end of 1990, the succubus left for Sao Paulo". And we know for a fact that, indeed, Anjo followed their orders and ended up going to Sao Paulo.
So, Ms. Grace isn't dead; she's the only survivor of that massacre and, if my theory is correct, she's also the orchestrator. She used Kimberly to kill these high-ranking manus, while at the same time not blowing her cover, and making Kimberly seem unstable/unreliable, so the Manus would probably want to get rid of the seal. Quite a smart move, if you ask me.
But what do you think? Too crazy? Honestly I can't wait for the big reveal that Grace was working for the Foundation all along, if it happens at any point in the future.
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howlsmovinglibrary · 2 days ago
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hi, im sorry if this sounds stupid but like. how do you get your brain to switch from academia to fanfic. like when im done with my lab reports and finally have time to write i feel like a textbook mimicking human speech
hey anon! none of this is stupid at all, please don't feel bad for asking a question :)
i think i should preface by saying, I wasn't a girl in STEM. I'm an English lit girlie, so often my academic work got me thinking about stories, which made me want to write stories, and thinking about D&D which made BG3 the perfect outlet! I couldn't write a paper titled 'D&D vampires are weird, huh?' but I could write stories around those themes. So sometimes my fic just became a place for me to explore the stuff that interested me but had no place in my professional work, which obviously made it easy to generate ideas and content.
but I have my advice under the cut! (bc this accidentally became a long post lol).
what advice I can give, however, is advice that was given to me by another friend, who is also a PhD student. She said (in quite a clinical way, but that's the kind of person she is) that she saw her fic and her writing as 'building mastery' - which was something she'd learned in therapy. the idea that practising something and working at it makes you better at it but also makes you feel better about yourself, because you can find enjoyment in the hobby and see improvements in your work. she wrote fic, to see a progress and a learning curve she didn't see in academia.
Idk what STEM is like, but often my experience in academia left me feeling stupid or inadequate. everything I wrote there mattered, and it didn't always bring me joy. I actually started writing fic, because I had just finished my PhD funding applications, and after sinking 100+ hours into something that made me miserable, I just wanted to write words that were fun for a change.
it doesn't always feel like it, of course, but fic doesn't matter. it should be fun. it can be silly, it doesn't have to fit a wordcount, it can be whatever you want it to be and it's never getting assessed at the end. and - unlike academia - typically it only receives positive feedback. so I write fic, bc it doesn't make me feel like shit, even when academia does. it's a different ballgame, and it has a much lower stakes, and more forgiving relative curve. i like it, becuase i switch my brain off, and get to have fun and play around in a way i don't in acadeimia.
so I guess my advice for this particular question - other than "please rest", bc like the last person who asked me about this you sound a wee bit burned out beloved - is.... it's literally fine, if you sound like a human textbook. forget the words and how they're coming to you as you write them - are you having fun with the idea? do you like the positive feeling of writing them, and the positive feedback you get either from yourself or others? that's how i switch from academia into fic mode. I find something that i actually find recreationally enjoyable (lol, academia).
let go of all expectations, and just follow the story or plot noodle that itches the happy parts of your brain. don't let it be about quality at all.
and, in case I've misunderstood the question and this is actually more an issue of stylistics - my fic got wordier as a result of my academia. even worse, my ACADEMIA got wordier as a result of my fic!!! (when the adverb curse follows you into your day job lmao). I don't think there's any way to prevent crossing the streams. But you can be sillier in fic, so add some jokes! make the stupid reference! let everyone be a little less formal!
and, if all else fails, get a second pair of eyes :) maybe from someone outside of the institution. they can tell you if you've become a pretentious ass overnight or not x
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bmpmp3 · 6 months ago
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finding out ur coworker is way older than you thought and having to very quickly reorient how you talk to them
#art#traditional art#watercolour#fanart#synthv#synthesizer v#genbu#kasane teto#rikka is also here :) i think she likes to cause problems sometimes. because all the adults in her life are dweebs#and very easy to cause problems with <3#anyone else have this happen before. im older than a lot of my university peers and i always have been#because i took 5 years in highschool and my undergrad has been like 6 years and counting#(hashtag learning disability <3 ) and like thats chill to me i dont mind#but now i usually assume everyones way younger than me and i get shocked when theyre not. a buddy in some of my classes#when i first met her i absolutely and completely assumed she was like barely 19 and talked to her as such#like i dont talk down to people or anything but i do soften the way i talk a bit and give a bit extra patience with younger peers#cause yknow. i remember what it was like being 19. being 26 is WAY easier lol so i wanna give em a bit of leeway yknow#anyway a few months after meeting her i found out she was actually a year older than me and a grad student when she ended up as a TA in#another class i took. i felt so bad. we bonded tho and she didnt mind she thought it was kinda funny when i was like WAIT UR A GRAD STUDENT#i thought she was like a first or second year undergrad..............#also yeah im a 31yo teto fan. i dont mind the popular fanon that she has a separate age that makes her actually 15 and#i dont mind that more interpretations have her like that BUT for my internal canon she is a grown ass woman because i think its fun <3#she pays taxes. she goes to work parties. she can rent a car. i love it#let teto rent a car. let her rent a car.#yknow im exicted to be 31. i still got a few more years of being a 20 something which is fun. but being a 30 something sounds like it rules
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cocoabubbelle-newblog · 9 months ago
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My personal opinion
Spoilers
Marvel Writers: Hank McCoy/Beast is irredeemable. He is a despicable villain. The version you will see in the upcoming comics is a clone of himself with only up to his mid-1980s memories/portrayal. If original Beast does come back, it will still be as a villain and he can never come back to the original team as a hero. He has no one to blame but himself.
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blkkizzat · 7 months ago
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i just wanna say tysm for all the sweet comments, reblogs, likes and new followers. literally have been dealing with some bs from school where i have to file a bias report and contest my grade because my professor is a bitch (tea in the tags). But you all really cheered me up and kept me going over the past few days!!! 🩵🩵
im off from work today for summer fridays! so hope i can write more today.
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autisticlee · 7 months ago
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sometimes I think about how when I went to college for a year before I dropped out (basically failed out,) the counselors/dean told me they can't help me at all or give any accommodations unless I have an official autism/adhd diagnosis. that might sound logical at first, but when you think about it more, it's actually quite fucked up. if someone is struggling really bad, what's the harm in helping them? why do they require a paper to get even the smallest amount of help? people who don't need help aren't going to be failing miserably without help! even NTs could benefit from some adjustments to the horrible school system! (but changing the entire system is a whole other conversation that the school system isnt ready for)
but even if you do agree to jump through their hoops, you realize it's even more fucked up that the diagnosis process requires YEARS in most cases (in my case it took 4 or 5 years, can't recall exactly now, for autism/adhd diagnosis, which would have meant i finished school before getting it if i managed to mot fail out, or i wait that long before going back, which is a whole struggle itself) and they also tried billing me for THOUSANDS of dollars because of insurance issues!!
so you put a ton of time and money into this, and then get told the only accommodation they are willing to give you for autism and adhd is "a little extra time on tests"
....
my test scores were the best part of my whole class experience. that was NOT what I struggled with!!!!! those tests were all online and could be done in the comfort of your home where you can accommodate yourself and have plenty of time left over when you finish them because you are comfy in your own space, (and also, no one was stopping you from having your notes/books/google open to find the answers,) and you don't even need a time consuming, expensive diagnosis for that!
SO WHAT'S THE POINT!!!!!!!
#mind you this was over 10 years ago now. it *could* have gotten better but id be extremely shocked if it has#autistic#autism#actually autistic#adhd#neurodivergent#audhd#school#school problems#yes i know theres rules or maybe even laws for this and its why they are like this but its bad and should change#if they offered smaller classes with less sensory overloading bullshit and other things i needed it would be great!#but they refuse to accommodate your actual needs and make up useless accommodations to legally say they help disabilities#ND people (not just audhd) and other disabled people that graduate with no useful accommodations are so strong and cool. proud of you!#ones who had to drop you youre also cool for not dealing with their bullshit snd allowing yourself to not suffer for a sheet of paper!#(though i know it can feel bad when everyone around you makes you feel bad for needed to drop out or failing out and not going back)#i completely stopped going to my psychology class because i started a week late due to scheduling issues and#suddenly we are told theres a paper due in 3 days and need to hse the textbook i didnt have yet as the source for it all#and it was in the syllabus i didnt get because i was a week late and didnt know we got one. the professor didnt notice me out of#the 100 other students in that large lecture hall. that room was also a sensory nightmare hellscape#too many students made things noisy and distracting. multiple fluorescent lights were flickering constantly and never fixed#the professor used a mic to speak to us and it had a constant horrible loud buzzing. it did that loud mic screech noise randomly#without warning. all the time. the quality of the sound was horrible so it was hard to understand her. on top of that she had a very thick#accent i wasnt familiar with so that on top of the horrible buzzing mkc quality that also cut her out constantly was auditory processing#disorder HELL. I dont know how ANYONE survived thst class but i seemed to be the only one struggling. everyone else turned in their papers#and i gave up and stopped going. was too late to drop the class to get my money back so i wasted probably a few thousand dollars#and THATS what i mean by give me reasonable and useful accommodation. test time would NOT make that class better at all#fix the mic and light issues at least or give me a smaller class with more attentive professor or something!#offer smaller classes for struggling disabled people! if the issue is not knowing who needs them then offer a switch to those struggling!#i got called onto a dean/counselor meeting because a professor noticed my horrible grades and stuff so its possible to catch us and help!#THESE SCHOOLS JUST NEED TO START BEING WILLING TO. dont make us do all the work to accommodate ourselves and expect to do well in school!
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thetimelordbatgirl · 8 months ago
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Ngl youtube videos suddenly got me slowly turning into a Justin Russo hater.
#like mainly later seasons him#early seasons him is fine#but like i guess plot wise you could argue he becomes more iffy because you know the competition will be soon#and justin does want to become the family wizard#as for some reason this show still never fully tackled the fucked up shit of the idea that wizard siblings have to grow up studying magic#only for one or two or whatever number siblings to lose it to one sibling in a competition#like stevie was the closest we got to that#but like it still dont make it less bad with how justin was#like the worst example i can name is him literally refusing to save alex whose his sister btw and shes always dropped shit to save him#because he wants to project onto her that she purposely fucked up his chances to get back into the competition via#pushing the students to take the test only for them to be failed because bad guy being bad guy in reality#and basically blames her for the failure and such as a result and acts like its all an act when she is mad on the students behalf and shit#and his students have to drag him kicking and screaming just to save her from the bad guy's shit#and there's also the competition itself where harper and zeke get grabbed by a creature during it#but alex has to convince her brothers to save the two and thats just cold already on justins end with zeke#but cause they took too long they all lose the competition and magic#and both brothers especially justin proceed to treat alex like shit even during work hours meaning#fucking over family business just to get at alex#and when the dad ultimately almost sells the place justin STILL blames alex#like she was the only one working fully max was being max and justin was being a little bitch to her#aka the infamous refusing to make her orders only max's and when he does he throws the sandwich at her#and cause she was holding drinks at the time and didnt see it coming the drinks went on a customer#and also throwing table trash into her already full bin shes carrying around while cleaning tables#and therefore messing it up for her like#and alex's logo...well from sounds of shit thats just justin again being a hateful bitch to his sister with zero consquiences#even one commenter pointing how he sadistically smiled while telling her all her friends hate her#like dear god if the show was doing this to make everyone root for alex its working i hate later season justin#gonna be interesting if hes matured or not as an adult
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c0rpsedemon · 1 year ago
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ok fr last one but there's actually a bootleg of my school's anastasia and i'm linking it bc you all NEED to understand that my infatuation with this one girl's voice which started when i was in the 6th grade and still hasn't really worn off isn't based on nothing
#brielle's the one in the n95 mask (the video is too grainy to actually make out any of the ensemble's faces but she stands out)#and i'm the in my 'teenage tboy's diy first short haircut' era in every scene she's in#apart from everything abt the girl who plays anya. the tea on everyone else is that our director liked the boy who played gleb's voice so#much that she actually lowered some if not all of his parts to be in his range. the guy who played vlad was a total diva and uhm. the phras#'peaked in high school' has been tossed around at him a lot. and the fact that he came back to sub the year after he graduated isn't helpin#his case. also he pressured the girl who played anya's grandmother into wearing old age makeup + spray her hair grey bc he decided he was#going to wear it and since she's supposed to be older than him she had to too and used to waltz into the girls' changing room whenever he#wanted. everyone was like super shocked during auditions though bc we all thought he was a shoe-in for dimitry esp since seniors get#priority casting bc it's their last chance. but at callbacks (we had singing auditions via video and dance auditions in person and callback#were tacked on to the dance auditions) he kinda flubbed his song and then this freshman. who was with us via google meet bc he literally ha#covid at the time absolutely blew him out of the water and i remember walking away w brielle like 'holy shit [first name] [last name] just#lost a part to a freshman' (he's the kind of person you just have to full name otherwise it sounds wrong). that said i do think he made a#much better vlad then he would've made a dimitry and while he is. a lot. he's always been nice to me and i did briefly idolize him and his#stage presence way i did anya's singing voice but that faded when i got into hs and started actually observing his prima donna ways#(the one production we were in together before in middle school we didn't have any scenes together). the girl who played the grandma#actually shouted me out in cast circle and that's the only time that's ever happened to me. also i'm p sure her dad is/was dating someone m#dad and by extension myself work with so that's. Oh My God. like she (the one who works for my dad) brought him w her to a comedy show as i#think her bf but i'm not 100% sure and when he found out what school i went to he mentioned his daughter went there and despite the fact#that i basically have a script for when people ask me that question bc i do NOT pay attention to most of my fellow students and don't know#anyone i was like 'holy shit' bc i actually did. hm what else. the guy who played the tsar and i used to shittalk bad period dramas#backstage during the first part of act 2. also during the press conference scene i need you to picture all the bolshevik soldiers and#romanov royals doing the macarena behind the curtain bc that was absolutely what we were doing back there. speaking of the press conference#the really high singing w/o a clear source was actually anya standing behind the curtain on the other side of the stage bc she's the only#one who physically could sing the part. also in regards to the bolshevik soldiers. we were originally supposed to have wooden rifles but fo#some reason our director took them out so we had to just walk menacingly towards the romanovs. you can't rlly see me that well in that scen#but that jacket would NOT stay closed and for 2/3 performances i had to awkwardly hold it closed the entire time. luckily the one that was#filmed was the one where i was smart enough to bring safety pins and also saved like all of the ballerinas bc their costumes all started#falling apart at once backstage.#romeo.txt#theatreposting
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blueish-bird · 9 months ago
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sorry if I don’t remember your name or conversations/experiences or basic things about myself, every few weeks my brain gets factory reset and I have to relearn how to be alive
#lighthearted but also serious bc what is going on here buddy#been feeling weird as hell these past few months#like I can remember some stuff… but it doesn’t feel normal to forget the names of anyone I haven’t seen/heard the name of in a few days#or forget about basic interests and personality traits and experiences and feel like a blank slate every day#idk like ultimately life goes on and I’m happy to live in the moment but it would be nice to understand why my brain is doing this#just thinking#meposting#I think my brain just. does this sometimes when I’m stressed. which is annoying#I recall (lmao) feeling similar during earlier parts of life so this isn’t *new* it’s just unexpected and much more disruptive as an adult#I’m feeling better about it than I was. after like. acknowledging it. bc my mind has not always felt like a sieve it isn’t always this bad.#whatever#I’ll tag as dissociation just in case it’s related/reminiscent and ppl don’t want to see that#dissociation#me and her go way back… haven’t seen each other in years though#she wasnt all bad! coping mechanisms can provide relief and a sense of safety#and as far as coping mechanisms go it’s not the most unhealthy. though it ranks high in ‘socially stunting’#I kind of miss the distance sometimes to be honest everything’s just So Much all the time#I’m so solid now#so stuck in the ruts of capitalism#fuck capitalism#I wish my imagination didn’t feel so dulled#sorry I love talking#and I don’t miss dissociation when I feel mentally present because I feel so Here with the people and things I love but rn?#it’s like a lose-lose bc I am not Here nor am I untethered. I’m heavy yet hold nothing#I enjoy being dramatic/poetic about it — I feel pretty fine. I just hope this isn’t a permanent and/or long-term state of existence.#like it makes me awful at my job I went from remembering a solid amount of the student body’s names (built up over a few years) to. like 5.#overnight it felt like. like Stressful Thing happened and I went to work and I couldn’t remember anyone’s names.#can’t believe I have to start from fucking scratch AGAIN I’d be better off quitting and working at a different school#bc at least then my lack of knowledge/remembering is justified rather than strange and seemingly rude#I’m getting better now but at the beginning of this it was blue screen in my brain all the time
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cloneboywonder · 1 year ago
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#I gave my mommy a bartskull for her car and she hung it up right away :3#my student cancelled so I didn’t go hang out so I just went right to my moms and we went to Starbucks and to a couple stores#and then we went home and planned costume stuff#and I wanted a hair cut so bad and the only appointment they had was like IMMEDIATELY so we left and then me and my mom both got one#we look so good I love her#and then we went and got lunch w her husband my buddy and then I hung out w Andy and we watched law and order I love barba I love making#like ytp sounds when he comes on screen and andy repeats them I love goofer to goofer interactions#and my mom was tired so she went to sleep while we watched and then when she got up we started costume stuff for real#we have like 3 of the pieces half done but we need to go get a special foot for the sewing machine or something#idk she’s the genius I’m just there#me and Lydia are gonna look so so so insane at the Boston concert I’m so excited#I need to make a bunch more bracelets I want to just give them away again#and it stormed super bad on the way home I was worried my car was going to get struck by lighting and I was scared I was going to crash#and I was crying so then I was more worried I was going to crash but I was fine and also I got gas I hate pouring gas they need ppl that#like pump it for you bc I don’t want to anymore#ough tk mom is waking up so early and I told her to call me so I will also get up early bc I need to most time possible to costume work#bc I have to be on a plane in like 6 days lol WITH THAT COSTUME in my suitcase#ough okay I love personal diary posting my apologies#my posts#byeeee byebye :-)
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morphogenetic · 1 year ago
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fuuuuck meeee i wanted to join the DEI committee in my department as a grad student but the one prof who i almost worked with and then didn't (......partially because she misgendered me even after I corrected her multiple times.......) is of COURSE going to be vice chair. fucking kill me
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