#only for one or two or whatever number siblings to lose it to one sibling in a competition

[thetimelordbatgirl]

Ngl youtube videos suddenly got me slowly turning into a Justin Russo hater.

[bnhaobservation]

Todoroki family and chap 430

In case it wasn't obvious by now, I was very invested in the Todoroki family storiline and one of the things that sadden me the most about chap 430 is this image.

We've Enji, or maybe I should say Endeavor, Rei is pushing his wheelchair as he goes somewhere, we don't know where, some want to think he's visiting Touya but it's not said and, around him there are 3 men and a woman.

It's not his children, it's his sidekicks and Hawks.

The final chapter doesn't touch what happened to Natsuo and Fuyumi, we've to assume Fuyumi is happy with her work and Natsuo with his marriage.

We don't know if Touya is still alive but, anyway, he's going to die. Even if we assume he died happily he had said smiling was why they lived their lives. He could keep on living out of anger and grudge but not out of smiles and happiness?

Fuyumi has fought for all those years so hard because she wanted back her family and she basically get nothing, not her old family as Natsuo leaves and Touya dies and it's not even hinted she has a new one as it was Natsuo the one who got a girlfriend as soon as he entered university and marries her basically a year and a half later.

Natsuo is just rushedly married to this character of which we don't even know the name. We don't know if, in the end he visited Touya again or not, we don't know if he ever managed to overcome all the anger and pain he felt inside for how his father ruined the family.

Shouto became a Hero, but his mother is not with him to support him but she is with his father. We don't see his siblings around him, cheering for him. We don't know which effect had on him to reconnect with Touya only to lose him. We're only told he became a good Hero so people don't call him anymore Endeavor's son, forgetting people also looked poorly at him for being Dabi's brother. How did he overcome that? Evidently it somehow disappeared as all the first years are already all his fans and even Dai said all the kids wanted to be like Shouto... but, at the end of the day, we aren't shown Shouto having a good moment with his family, his good moments come from being a Hero and being with his friends.

Even if we assume that, despite having to marry Enji out of duty to help her family, Rei had fallen in love with Enji while their family was having a good time before he turned abusive, and now that she had forgiven him and he stopped being abusive she's glad to be back with him... skipping this was very vaguely constructed she lost 10 years in a hospital and we can't see her with her children. She's supposed to be happy being with him with one of her children dead and one of her children keeping away from his father because just being in the same room with him makes him feel bad.

Mind you, I'm not saying Natsuo should forgive Enji or force himself to be with Enji or whatever but having a person that's related to you that makes you to feel bad just by being in the same room with you so that you've to avoid that person, is not something that's good. If Enji and Rei live together and Natsuo wants to visit his mother he has to make sure to do it when his father is somewhere else. In the past Rei was split between taking care of Shouto, who couldn't be with her other children, and taking care of Touya, Fuyumi and Natsuo, with the result Natsuo felt neglected because he was very small when all this happened and needed his mother... but likely she ended up neglecting Fuyumi and Touya too because you can't be in two places at the same time. Now, instead than having to take turns with Shouto, Natsuo have to take turns with Enji.

Ad for Enji... all his atonement for what? He doesn't manage to rebuild a relation with his children, apparently his sidekicks and Hawks have replaced them, they're conveniently of the right number. His children would have gotten where they were even without his atonement because all we hear is about others helping them, he only get the cool sentence, we see nothing of his struggle. But this is also supposed to be a happy ending for him. Who care if he doesn't have his kids? He has his sidekicks and Hawks his newfound family he would have had anyway had he focused on his work only.

The story tried it's hardest to make me think he cared about his family but then I'm supposed to think he's happy not having any of the sort apart for Rei and a new found family.

Horikishi had already established in the previous chapter Enji would have his sidekicks and Hawks' support, I didn't need a reminder of that.

I needed to see THIS image at the end...

...maybe including Natsuo's girlfriend as he could have introduced her to the rest of the family... or him holding his firstborn and letting Rei see her grandchild.

I needed to see Fuyumi finding someone with whom to form a family since she can't have her own back and she wished so badly for it.

I needed to have this being shown to me...

...or at least to see Touya out of that contraption as he died in peace, a smile on his lips since happiness somehow couldn't save him but grudge could.

I needed to be told something that Enji did that HELPED his kids, that made them be better. Not something vague, I need something concrete. Even if they would never be with him, since he's supposed to atone to them, I need him to make something more than just give them a new house and pay for the bills because he'd been paying bills through all his life so that's not new.

I would have been fine with him watching them smile from a distance or hearing from Rei how they were doing and smiling.

Mind you, I'm willing to believe in Horikoshi's mind Enji now is a changed man and very sorry for what he did and loves his family and yadda yadda but there's a reason why we say 'show, don't tell' and so far Horikoshi is more interested in telling than showing.

I get that in his mind Enji is a character more important than Rei, Fuyumi, Natsuo or even Touya, I would have been fine with all that I've mentioned being shown through his perspective because he cares about his family and so he's happy if they're happy.

If, in all that talking Midoriya does about reaching out to others, what he wanted to point out was Enji had continued to reach out to help his family even if they had cut him out of their lives.

But no, the good part is that his sidekicks and Hawks are reaching out for him. Okay, I can take this as the test trying again to point out Enji will never be a Hero, in the end he's not the one reaching out but the one others have to reach out to help but, again, it was established in the past chapter so I didn't need a reminder and it kind of steps all over his arc of trying to reach out for his family.

In the end the most he does is to just take it when they want to yell at him and let them live the live they want... I do think it's a great thing if an abuser were to realize what he had done to his victims and try to atone. It's kind of a miracle turned true... but there's just too little of it in this story.

Maybe I'm missing some deep cultural context, maybe Enji is doing something AMAZING for his family that Horikoshi thought he didn't need to show because it's obvious to Japanese readers but... but I wish he had shown it. Instead the moment Enji finally stop being a Hero and could do something for his family, the manga ends with his family disregating but I'm supposed to see it as a happy ending.

I prefer it had just been called a sad ending. Bad things happen, I can stomach them but honestly "Ano Hana" makes a much better work at portraying grief and atonement and the same goes for "Koe no katachi".

Horikoshi knew he was selling this manga also to foreign readers. I'm not saying he should have made his manga thinking to them but, if this atonement arc was so important, maybe he should have made it more understandable for us as well. This makes the diffference between a national mangaka and an international one.

[ayrtonswnna]

ʚïɞ "we crash at the same place" platonic!CL16

↳ masterlist ↳ drop a request! ↳ ferrari '25! (LH44 angst)

✧₊⁺ charles leclerc (platonic) x aurélie leclerc (sister!female oc)

✧₊⁺ word count: > 1,5k⠀⠀✧₊⁺ gender: angst/fluff

✧₊⁺ summary: aurélie is living her rookie year in formula one and charles can't seem to settle down. good thing they crash at the same place.

✧₊⁺ warnings: crash description, merc and ferrari mentioned, cursing, charles giving 0 fucks about team rules, healthy siblings relationship.

"Yellow flag, sector two, Charles. Beware."

"Yeah, copy. Is everything okay?"

The engineer glanced at the screen for a few seconds before saying anything. There was a Mercedes crashed into the barriers; the one with a fellow Leclerc inside. They needed to be really careful with how they worded the news.

Maybe when she leaves the car... They can give him the full information and ease the tension.

Aurélie Leclerc didn't even have a full season in Formula One yet; it was her rookie year. At first, the tifosi team were pretty worried about how things would go down with siblings on the grid, since it was easy to understand how their relationship worked. Charles would retire from the race as soon as he knew there was a chance his sister might be hurt.

Mercedes was facing the same struggle, though. Their second driver was clearly being manipulated every now and then on the radio. While Ferrari chose to just be careful with their timing and take things as far as they could, Toto Wolff decided to just lie. Yellow flag? No, nothing bad. Just a lot of debris on the track, let's box and change the tires.

"Is it?" he insisted.

Ever since the season started, he had become more and more systematic over the radio calls. Always asking for updates on the Mercedes, every yellow or occasional red flag needed to be properly described; he needed to be sure his sister wasn't involved.

"Yeah, Charles. Don't worry. You're P4 right now, the current gap is 0.7 seconds."

"Do you think the flag will take too long? A safety car, maybe?"

Again, the engineer looked up at the screen broadcasting the race cameras. The flag wasn't gone, actually. Aurélie was still inside the car, and the marshalls seemed like they were talking to her.

"No, it’s almost gone. Work on the tires in the meantime."

"Sure— Oh, Mercedes. Is it Aurélie? Is she out of the car? Is she okay?"

By that time, Charles was taking the first turn in sector two. Of course he could see his sister's car, and of course the engineer was double-crossing the idea of lying. For a greater good, maybe?

"We don't know much, but it's all safe. Keep up, Cha."

The man kept his eyes on the screen, waiting for something to happen before he had a Ferrari DNFing on purpose.

"Are you sure? I overtook Hamilton a few laps ago, so... Oh—fuck."

Seconds later, Charles was also against the barriers. The box wasn't able to see it yet, but he was just too distracted trying to catch up with whatever happened to the Mercedes and let the car escape his control, going over a kerb. It caused the rear tires to lose traction, and then it happened.

"I'm okay, leaving the car."

Everyone knew he wasn't just leaving the car. His crash was still in section two, so he wouldn't have to walk much.

"Charles, beware. You can't walk on track and will be noted. Wait for the marshalls to take you and the car."

But he didn't wait. He just left and took his seconds to think, before seeing a Mercedes pass on the track. Number 44.

Of course they'd lie. Of course. If Lewis was on the track, it could only be Aurélie crashed into the barriers.

Charles said nothing else. He walked the few meters to where his sister's car remained broken and crashed, watching as the marshalls helped her out of the seat.

"What the fuck, Cha!" she exclaimed, fixing her helmet. "You need to race! C'mon!"

"I crashed. Are you okay? Did it hurt?"

Aurélie was not the youngest Leclerc; she left that role for Arthur. But she was the only girl, and they always made sure they treated her just like a princess. That's why Charles worried to death about her.

"Oui, Cha. I'm fine," she chuckled. He managed to lift her visor, bending a bit so he could see inside the helmet. "This damn race... I can't have any luck in the rain."

"Yeah, you're a Leclerc," he chuckled, putting her visor down again. It was still raining. "Let's get out of the rain and shower. I'll try to get us home as soon as possible."

"Please... I just need some rest."

It took a few hours, actually. The whole dynamic of DNFing, the team and media duties, and then the private jet.

"You look destroyed," Charles said softly as he handed his sister a bottle of water.

They had done this since forever, a natural and casual demonstration of worry every time they brought water or food to each other. Well-raised kids tend to bring these things to the table.

"Yeah, I bumped into a wall earlier," she chuckled, clearly tired. "Again, how did you crash, Cha? I helped you and gave you a yellow flag! There was no race!"

"Saw my sister crashed into a wall and lost the car." His shoulders shrugged. "You did the same earlier this year, so... let's call it quits because we really are birds of a feather."

"That is highly unprofessional," she took a sip of water, catching a bit of the view as the jet settled in the sky. "And I already told you about that time. It was sibling connection because I felt in my little heart that you said you're stupid. I'm the only one who gets to call you that."

"Because your stupidity has to overcome my stupidity." He rolled his eyes. "Remember when we were kids and we were on the karting track, and you turned the kart around because I was fighting that random boy? Papa was so mad, Jesus Christ."

"But you can't fight! I had to help! Papa forgave me when I told him you were going to get hurt." Aurélie took some of the water, watching Charles seat in front of her with an incredulous look on his face, overreacting.

"I wasn't going to get hurt! Oh my God, you two had no faith in me!" he rolled his eyes, throwing the pillow he was about to use in his sister's direction.

"Us three. Arthur was also afraid of how you'd go around if you had to defend yourself. You're lucky Lorenzo didn't like this racing thing." Of course, she wouldn't miss the chance to annoy him. "Get over it, Pins à Roulettes. You're a lady."

"We raised you like a lady! C'mon!" he opened his arms, like he was very affected by her words even if his playful smirk gave it away. "Mamain had to tell us to stop carrying you everywhere because you wouldn't learn how to walk! We got seats on the bikes and everything! You're the lady!"

"Yeah, that's why all your past hundred and three girlfriends hate me," it's her turn to roll her eyes. "What can I do? I'm the family's princess!"

"You are the family's princess, yeah. If you didn't follow my lead and start this racing thing... it'd be easier to treat you like a princess."

"What? Does that imply that when I'm on your back and approaching to overtake... does that mean you are not letting me win?" she's way better with this drama thing; she's an actor.

She even pouts, looking very disappointed even before Charles dropped any reaction.

"No! What do you think this is? Monaco's indoor kart-track? You have enough knowledge to overtake me by merit." He scorned, standing up to steal his pillow back before taking his time to adjust his seat.

The flight home was quiet after their playful banter, both siblings lost in their thoughts. When they finally landed, it was late, and exhaustion weighed heavily on both of them.

Driving home, the streets of Monaco were almost deserted, the city's lights reflecting on the wet pavement. They pulled into the driveway, and Charles turned off the engine.

"Home sweet home," he said, glancing at Aurélie.

She chuckled, her tired eyes lighting up. "Feels good to be home."

They stepped into their shared apartment, the familiar warmth and scent instantly soothing their tired bodies. Charles headed straight to the kitchen, rummaging through the fridge. "How about a late-night snack? What do you feel like?"

"Anything," Aurélie replied, plopping down on the couch. "I just want to relax."

Charles whipped up some sandwiches and grabbed a couple of drinks, bringing them to the living room. They ate in comfortable silence, the day's events slowly melting away.

After eating, they settled on the couch, pulling a blanket over themselves. Aurélie rested her head on Charles's shoulder, and he wrapped an arm around her.

"Remember when we were kids and used to do this?" Aurélie murmured. "After karting, we'd come home, eat something, and then cuddle up like this."

"Yeah," Charles replied softly. "I remember. Those were the best times."

They reminisced about their childhood, the laughter and the fights, the shared dreams and the unwavering support they had for each other. Slowly, their words faded into the quiet night, the warmth of their bond enveloping them.

As they drifted off to sleep, Aurélie whispered, "Merci, Cha. For always being there."

"Always," he replied, his voice a gentle promise.

And with that, they fell asleep, the memories of their childhood and the strength of their sibling bond wrapping around them like a protective shield, ready to face whatever came next, together.

ʚïɞ ayrtonswnna, 2024. check my masterlist or drop a request (: reblogs and feedback are always welcome (:

[ryker-writes]

If my last thought of my was too dark… this is nicer I promise 🙏.

Leona with younger sibling who’s treated similar to him. They also are told the same things… how they should be like the first born. But Leona noticed it. So he decided they should have someone to always be there. For anything they did he congratulated them. So you got 90 out of 100? That’s still great, good job kid. You want to try *insert new interest/hobby*? Go for it! If they need someone to talk to… he may not be the best at comforting but he’ll listen. Because of that he was there number 1, just like they were his and that’s all that mattered.

~💜~

Of course my darling 💜 anon! It's so rare that I get nice sibling relationship requests. I love this thank you for requesting it <3

Request rules and Masterlists

Leona as a sibling (Supportive relationship)

most would think that being a part of the Kingscholar family meant you got the best of everything

while that was partly true, it was also very wrong

when it came to most things, Falena got the best while you and Leona got whatever was left

since Leona was older than you, he always got first pick on whatever was left

but most times he didn't care and just let you have it or split it between the two of you

that was just the way things were

the oldest always got the most attention and the most love

Leona tried to avoid Falena as much as he could, so when you would spend time with the oldest, it would just be you two

Falena always tried to make sure the two of you had fun

he would always want to play together or show you a new game he learned about

he was teaching you about a game involving a bunch of chalk squares on the ground

basically you have to get through the squares, sometimes hopping on one foot, without falling

Falena gave you a nice and flawless demonstration before giving you your turn

the first few squares were fine

but then you got to two single squares in a row

once you reached the second square, you lost your balance and fell down

your knees roughly scraped against the ground and would surely start bleeding in a few moments

from behind you, you could hear some of the servants quietly snickering

they were whispering to each other about how clumsy you were compared to how perfectly Falena did it

Falena came running over to you to check on you, and you didn't want to play anymore

that was only the first time you noticed it happen

you started to notice it more after that

while walking through the halls you would hear servants comparing you and Leona to Falena

saying you guys weren't as smart or strong and you guys didn't carry the insanely friendly and cheerful energy

they would talk a lot about how they wished you were like Falena

because that would make you easier to deal with

and when it came to anything involving Falena, they would cheer him on, and only him

you understood why Leona avoided hanging out with Falena

of course, it wasn't Falena's fault he was born first

but that didn't stop the jealous feeling that built up inside you

one time, you were walking with Leona when you heard them talking about you again

you were trying not to react but you couldn't stop the frown

and when Leona turned to look at you, you avoided his gaze

he must've heard it too

one of his ears twitched as they continued talking

then Leona grabbed your arm and started dragging you away

little did you know, Leona had made a decision in his mind

you two were being treated the same, and no one was there to support either of you

so, he would be your support

if no one else did, then he would

Leona started to hang out with you more and play games with you like Falena did

but this time, things were better

whenever the servants would compare you two, Leona would end up losing or messing up somehow

not every time of course

he was trying to prove that neither of you was better than the other

and in return, you supported him

this system followed you two into Night Raven College

so even though you weren't being compared to Falena, you still supported each other in everything

no matter what score you got on your assignments, as long as it passed he was proud of you and congratulating you

you need help? not a problem he can help

he's proud of you for even being able to ask for help

if you ever need to talk about something or he even senses you're having a rough time, he's there

first he simply asks you what's wrong and he'll try to help any way he can

if you refuse to answer, he just silently stays by you and follows you around

he's pretty good and being able to tell what's wrong with little clues so he may find out eventually and try to help

generally he's willing to support anything you do

you've taken an interest in any specific club? he's going to encourage you to try it and may even introduce you to some of the club members

even if it's Malleus' gargoyle studies club

he'll still support you and encourage you to try it

but internally he wishes you had picked anything else

speaking of Malleus

while you two aren't being compared to Falena anymore, Leona would sometimes be compared to Malleus

and it's in these scenarios that you can really support him

so when he has Spelldrive games, you'll be there cheering him on from the crowd

he really appreciates it when you do especially if he's facing off against Malleus

if you want to become friends with Malleus...

he will still support you and reluctantly encourage you to try

even though Leona has a hatred for the guy, he's not going to let that get in the way of supporting you

it's safe to say that you were closer with Leona than you were with Falena

so while Falena may have been born first, Leona was your #1 brother

[groenendaelfic]

you know I wasn't going to comment on anything s3 in detail or write a super long divisive post because that's draining and tiring and I just want everyone to have fun and find joy in fandom in whatever way is best for them. And yet here we are. Who'd have thought?

All I wanted from season 3 was for Wilmon to talk to and with each other, to get to know each other (better) and to try to understand and support each other and grow together. To be a couple in love and working on their relationship, learning from each other. Them against the world, facing problems together as a team. I wanted romance and hugs and honesty, and all I got was them being horny. I mean don't get me wrong I love them being horny, but I don't want that to be their entire (positive) relationship and the only thing they have going for them as a couple. Please just have an actual, proper conversation with each other?

This post however is not about that. This post is about Kristina.

I hate what they did with her. I hate her entire character arc (if you can call it that) in s3. I hate what triggered her breakdown. I hate that instead of breaking the circle of abuse and emotional and physical neglect she no doubt suffered, she perpetuated it.

She left her son alone when he needed her most. When all he needed was a hug and a good long cry and the assurance that he's not alone, that she's there for him. That she understands. For someone (his family) to be there and listen and assure him that for them, Wille comes first. (I mean not all, he also needed proper therapy for one, but that'd have been a great and important start)

Wille is a child. Her child. Wille needed her and she failed him. She pushed him away and she sent him away and she left him alone.

(the same is true for Ludvig of course, it'd be extremely sexist etc to not put the exact same expectations and blame on him as well, but alas this post is only indirectly about him as everything always is at best)

However.

Her son is dead.

She's been groomed to believe her entire purpose in life is to be a mascot (which comes with very specific expectations and restrictions she herself said she struggled to adapt to) and to give birth to the next mascot.

I don't pity her for that, but that's still her entire identity and purpose in life. It's always been, and now the next mascot is dead and she has to burden the son she thought would be spared with it all, pun very much intended.

But let's return to my first point first. Her son is dead. Not just the next mascot. Her son.

Yes, Wille's brother died as well and I'll never make light of that. It's horrible and a grief and pain impossible to put into words. Especially as a kid or young teen. Wille needs all the support. Still.

It's not the same.

I know it's not the same because I know exactly what it's like. Both of it.

Granted I'm not a queen, but I did have a cousin who died aged sixteen. We lived in the same house their entire life and shared a bedroom for years. We were like siblings. It was my first time experiencing the death of a close loved one and it was horrible. We all struggled for a long time. Their siblings and I and the entire family, and they will never be forgotten, but it broke my aunt and uncle. Fifteen years later and they're still broken.

I also have two sons and a spouse who are dead (no I didn't lose them, I know exactly where they are) and I promise you it's not the same. A dead sibling is nothing like a dead child. (not that it's a competition)

I'm not going to talk about what it does to you internally, but I will tell you what you'll experience from the outside world when your family dies excitingly enough to make it to the local newspaper. Then feel free to multiply it by a large number of your own choosing when you're royalty and the entire country is looking at you and you've been groomed to never lose composure.

Everyone will call and show up and want to show their support and their condolences (that lasts until about a week or so after the funeral). And they will get two words in and break down and cry, each and every one of them, and then it's your job to console them and be strong and deal with all the arrangements and lawyers and bureaucracy. And it'll have to be you for most things no matter how supportive your family might be, because it's you who needs to sign shit and show the school a death certificate. Everyone will mean well, but it'll be everyone else who'll require reassurance and you who'll have no choice but to function because at first there's so much to do. So much. You won't have time to breathe until after the funeral, and after that there're still so much more to do and take care of you'd never have considered before. For weeks. You can ask someone else to drive you but it'll still be you who's required to show up and do the thing. Some things will drag out for months and more. You don't have time to break down and be weak. You can't afford to, because you also have a job and other responsibilities and a duty to your dead loved ones.

But then the day comes when it's 'over' and there's nothing more to do. Sure people still look at you with pity and whisper behind your back wherever you go and fall quiet, unsure how to react or what to say, because you're now the lady who lost her family in a freak accident, but everything and everyone else moves on. That's normal. It can't not. But it's that quiet after which is the most dangerous.

I hate that they made Kristina's breaking point her son publicly coming out as queer, renouncing following traditions without thought and admitting to having been in the video. I hate it so much, because that was a choice made with an entirely different motive behind the one I'll expound on now and I hate that. Don't instrumentalize grief and the loss of a child and sibling to further prove and underline your political agenda (which I agree with). It cheapens it and was very much unnecessary. We all would've gotten the point without it as well.

But you know what? I can't fault Kristina for that.

You don't know your breaking point until you reach it. It can be anything. There's a reason the saying goes 'the straw that broke the camel's back'. Everyone has a different one and they often feel very ridiculous to oneself (which is a very helpful feeling in that situation, believe me /s). I've talked to numerous people who've gone through something similar. In my support group and in grief counseling and group therapy. No one I've met had a 'logical' breaking point.

Mine came late last fall when I saw a robin outside my window. Yes a bird. We'd have one come every winter to eat the oats and raisins etc we put out for it, and my youngest would spend endless hours every day before dusk looking out that window waiting for the robin to come and eat for a few moments at a time, less if he started clapping out of excitement.

That was it. Boom. I was useless for the next seven weeks.

You don't let your grief overcome you. That isn't a choice. You don't choose not to function when a loved one dies. You don't choose to be depressed or to have the most ridiculous thing be your breaking point. You don't choose to be too strong to not let the grooming break you or to be too weak to be unable to break out of it. And you don't choose to be unable to sit at a birthday party and enjoy cake with a son you know you'll have to force into a role he never wanted, the one your dead son was supposed to fill.

Does that make Kristina any less of a shitty mom? No, of course not. Nor does it change anything for Wille. Kristina's grief shouldn't be Wille's concern. But you don't choose any of that, and the stronger you have to appear the farther you'll fall once you just can't hold it together anymore.

I grew up with a very large, multicultural extended family. There wasn't an hour I was awake at home as a kid when I wasn't hugged or kissed by a younger cousin or aunt or my mom (it was super annoying). We talked and still talk about everything. I married into a family which was a bit less physical and more Swedish in showing their affection, but they are still very open and loving and genuine. I had all the support I could ask for. They're the best and I couldn't have asked for more.

It's not enough. Your child is dead. And Kristina had none of that.

Is Kristina (and Ludvig) super annoying for going on and on and on about Erik and how perfect he was? About always bringing him up when they have a son right there who needs them desperately?

Yes. It annoyed me too. I kept catching myself being furious on Wille's behalf and Simon's with how Wille reacted to the not-comparison between Erik and Sara. But I understand Wille's reaction to Simon and I understand Kristina and Ludvig.

Because once your child / sibling / spouse / dog dies?

They become perfect. My oldest once poured syrup where he shouldn't (it was a Nordic winter night and the car was thirsty) resulting in us being out of our only car, our insurance laughing at us, and us unable to afford a new one. It cost a lot of money, my spouse almost their job and made our life a lot harder for well over a year. He was old enough to know better (and leave the house by himself to go outside and play). He never did anything wrong in his life. He was perfect. They were all perfect.

Erik? What we learn about him is horrifying, and it being normalized and dare I say institutionalized, with him probably not having second guessed his actions, makes it worse instead of better. I do believe Erik was the kind of guy who just didn't (care to) think and merely did what was expected without further thought. That doesn't make it better either, because those kinds of people are the ones who keep corrupt systems running. I might be wrong about his character entirely, but it doesn't matter, because as soon as he died he became perfect.

It's weird what death does to our perception of a loved one. Or maybe not. It's also weird what death does to our perception of everything, because suddenly everything will remind us of that person.

A cloud? A scent? A sound? Toilet paper? Kristina is at the stage where everything she sees and feels and smells and hears will remind her of Erik and his death. Of how he's dead and now Wille has to become him and that is the worst.

Also her son is dead.

No she can't just pull herself together and eat the damn cake. Everything she talks about is Erik because everything she currently is is Erik. Her son who is dead.

There is a reason this is such an often used trope in fiction.

Kristina spent all her life being told that her duty to the throne is her only purpose in life. Be queen. Represent Sweden. Produce an heir. Part of why she's as old as she is is no doubt because Pernilla August is awesome and you can't not hire her when that's an option, but nothing else in this show is a coincidence and done without thought, so I refuse to believe that Kristina hasn't always been meant to be an older mom.

Maybe she had fertility issues. Maybe she for whatever reason didn't want kids and put it off for as long as she could. She's certainly not maternal. Unlike every other woman her generation, no one ever expected her to be maternal. That's not her job.

Quite the opposite. Kristina is old enough to have been raised at a time when royal mothers weren't expected to have any hand in raising their children except for approving (or rather disapproving chosen) nannies and playmates and tutors and the like. She was very likely the first female heir apparent, or maybe she was simply the heir because she had no (male) siblings. Either way her job was always to be a monarch, not a woman or a mother. That's what staff is for. That's not an excuse, but it does explain her as a character.

She was groomed and forced herself to adjust (I do believe forced is the right word, because unlike Erik she seems to (have) be(en) a lot more like Wille than she'd like to admit). She had to be strong and queen and represent Sweden. And then her son and heir died and she failed at both.

I do believe Erik was always the 'easier' child, doing what he was told and taking only the freedoms he knew he'd be granted, while Wille is willful, argues, has a temper and his own head. (that doesn't mean Erik was happier or better adjusted)

And now Erik is dead and Wille has to fit the mold. Wille who got to go to a normal school and clubbing and was let to run wild with little preparation for the role he'd someday have to support his brother with. Arguments can be made that Kristina and everyone else never cared about Wille until they needed him, but I'd like to think she meant well and gave him the freedom she could, and because she is a bad parent she thought she was being kind, and because she is queen no one told her otherwise until it became a problem.

Kristina has never been a good parent, and I honestly believe saying someone meant well is an insult and not an excuse, but I do believe she tried the best with what she knew, the best she could.

It wasn't enough, it was the opposite of enough, but she tried and her breakdown is not a weakness but something which was a long time in coming.

She's not maternal. Her job wasn't to be maternal. Her job is to be a mascot and have other people make sure the next mascot is fed and watered and able to perform. Her being too brainwashed to see how horrifying that is does not make her innocent or any less of a bad mother, but why would she think of acting any other way?

She's ashamed of her breakdown. She can't be weak. Not in front of the nation and not in front of her son and heir. Wille can learn and grow and change. Everyone can and it's never too late, but Kristina here is meant to be what Wille risks becoming if he doesn't, if he gives up and becomes a thoughtless mascot.

Kristina is not a victim and I can't forgive her for being a shit mom, but she's also not the devil. She's a mother who lost her child, and she's spent her whole life being told that the worst thing she can do is to appear weak.

Well guess what? At one point that simply doesn't work anymore.

This post by the lovely @voldiebeth is what motivated me to write a similar one. I originally planned on reblogging and merely adding my own thoughts, and I did talk to her before posting, but then it became something even more personal than originally planned, and considering the difficulty of the subject I found myself more comfortable making this a standalone post. I know that's not proper tumblr etiquette, but please bear with me. Many thanks to @voldiebeth for motivating me to put my convoluted thoughts and feelings in writing and order them a bit. It was very cathartic.

[rosie-kairi]

I don't think I've ever really spoken in depth about how much I love Lauriam as a character, which is honestly a crime because out of all the Union Leaders I'd probably have to crown him as my number one favorite.

I love Lauriam not only as a character (pink, sibling plotline) but also as an example of how much prequels can recontextualize an entire character. While Ventus is also an example of this, I think we all knew that he probably had some sort of messed up past that landed him in the clutches of Old Man Xehanort. Marluxia, on the other hand, had absolute zero background to infer from his screentime. He was the villain, you're not really meant to think too hard about him and how he became who he is because he sucks and you hate him.

I don't think there were many people chomping at the bit wanting to get info about his past. Like, it would've been cool to get, but I don't think a background for Marluxia was necessary for the story at that point in time. His role was to establish the organization as a threat to Sora and the other guardians, and that was pretty much the extent of it.

And then Union X happened, and Lauriam entered stage right into a tragedy where his fate was already sealed. You look at Lauriam with his polite little smiles and cute little chibi animations and immediately think "what is this man up to" because you are already primed to distrust him on principle due to COM. Did not help his case that he was introduced in the cutscene immediately following the death of Strelitzia, painting a huge target on his back. Fandom reaction was hostile towards him before he was even fully on screen. Occam's Razor, the most obvious answer is the correct one. Lauriam is the obvious suspect because of his actions in the future, so he must be the killer. Literally him just existing in a scene caused more ire to build against him.

But then the Shift Pride cutscene happened. Then it was revealed that Lauriam and Strelitzia -the girl who so many thought he killed- were siblings, and that he was quite worried for her wellbeing, actually.

Every cutscene a clearer picture of who Lauriam is a person was painted, and soon you stopped looking at him with distrust, and it's replaced with the question of "What happened to you?". What happened that caused Lauriam, someone who has been shown to care deeply and immensely about the people he loves, someone who is willing to do anything for those people, become Marluxia? It became increasingly obvious that they were incredibly different people, even though Marluxia came from Lauriam.

And this isn't to say that there was no connection between the two. Lauriam seemed to be incredibly self-confident in his abilities, enough to be pretty steadfast in his resolve to square up with goddamn Maleficent of all people (even if he did get his ass kicked). There's also his very intense anger, as seen in the cutscene where Ventus confesses to being the reason why Strelitzia "vanished", as well as a bit in the scene where he's at Ventus's bedside.

This is all to say that Lauriam was not a necessary addition to the khux cast, he very well could've been swapped with a random new character and the plot probably would've worked fine, all things considered. But because it's Lauriam -the somebody of a character that has already been established to be a prick- it gives his whole plotline a hell of a lot more punch. If it was a new character, people probably wouldn't have been as distrusting of him right of the bat, the sibling plotline would be sweet, but because it's Lauriam and we know how he ends up in the future, it becomes a hell of a lot more tragic. How did the change happen? He's tragic because we know that whatever he does will lead to the outcome of him losing his heart and falling to darkness, something that is essentially the exact antithesis of the keyblade wielder mission statement.

Lauriam is someone who was made to struggle against the destiny that was written out for him with a neat pen and ink, and someone who was doomed to fail in every regard. He could not save his sister, he could not defeat Maleficent, he could not help Ventus, he could not keep his memories when thrown into the future. He couldn't do anything about it.

I realize this is all rounding back around to "the inherent tragedy of prequels" but it's true.

...and yeah that's basically it. I have a lot more thoughts about this guy but I feel like if I write anymore I'm just gonna sound completely incomprehensible bc I'm very tired. Thanks for reading, and don't forget to sparkle on

[blacklegsanjiii]

Thought of a au to add more trauma for Sanji, Law and Robin :) basically the RLS!siblings au

So, after Cora dies, Law ends up finding Robin who decides to help this teenager and they stay together, until they also find a freesly free from the dunsheon Sanji. Both help Sanji and with time, all of them start to feel like siblings.

This is, until a storm happens, separating the 3 of them. After this, things go like the story: Robin joins Baroque Works, Law starts the Heart Pirates and Sanji meet Zeff. But in their minds, they always suffer bc of what happened.

Years later, Sanji joins the StrawHats and him and Luffy start dating short before entering the Grand Line. Then Alabasta happens and Sanji remeet his sister (both are crying when they finally have the chance to be alone). Then Water 7 with Sanji having a damn crisis. Then everything goes until Marineford, where Law helps to save Ace since he is the old brother of his little brother boyfriend's. Punk Hazard where both R and S are relivied to see Law. Dressrosa where Robin and Law can talk again.

And then WCI, who Robin joins bc fuck it, her little brother helped her so much during Water 7 and she's NOT letting him stay with the same fucking people who made all the wounds and scars she saw in the past. After all this, all the 3 of them finally are able to be together again after the battle in Wano (with a Luffy wanting affection from his boyfriend after the fight, of course)

Sure, more trauma, it's fine. (They are barely holding it together fam.) This is very long so there is a cut!

Like 13 year old Law finds 17 year old Robin and they're staring at each other with a lot of distrust. Law is still really fresh off losing Corazon, it's been like two weeks, maybe. Then they find out they both have fruits and train with each other. Especially given their professions it's very helpful. So they travel together and train, stay out of eyesight from the government and the Donquixote family.

Then they find a child in a metal helmet. Law shambles it off the kid and they start checking him over because what the fuck? The kid is fucked up and they find out his name is Sanji and he's eight. Law and Robin take him along and start the Heart Pirates with Shachi, Bepo, and Penguin. The captain is the spotted kid in the spotted hat and the polar bear is the first mate as Sanji is the chef and Robin is the archeologist. Law tells them about Cora-san and how he wants his revenge, Sanji tells them about the All Blue in all the childlike wonder he can muster, Robin talks about the poneglyphs and reading them.

It's before anyone else gets bounties so it's just Robin who has one when the storm hits a couple years later sending them all adrift. Law manages to stay with Bepo, Shachi, and Penguin but his brother and sister are gone. They're gone and he can't stop crying. Law thought he was done losing family. Robin who lost her second family and heaves sobs before she wipes her face and looks ahead. She only allows herself a short time to mourn. Sanji is just numb, he's been abandoned before, he thought it would happen again. He cries when he feels something other than the numbness, the deep bone settled hurt that sometimes comes to the surface. Then he starves with some old guy on a rock.

Sanji doesn't get Law's number in this. Sanji thinks they're dead and they think he's dead too. So when he joins the Strawhat Pirates as the cook and starts dating the captain he just goes along with whatever hair brained scheme they have going for them. When he sees Robin for the first time they both do a double take because they're not dead and they're seeing each other. Law's bounty has been out for a while so they know about him but each other? They ran into each other? And they're fighting? Sure. Checks out for both of them honestly.

Also when Crocodile falls for the Mr. Prince thing Robin is giggling to herself, and when he falls to her baby brother and his crew? Amazing. She has joy in her heart for the first time in a long time, to see Sanji alive and trying to love. Once they have a moment alone they catch up and Robin looks at the smoking man who shrugs and looks back. She nods and that's that. They're alive and together.

After the Buster Call in Enies Lobby and Sanji pulling Robin aside and is just begging to not lose her again and she nods and apologizes. Luffy finds them later curled up after they said goodbye to Merry and are waiting on the Sunny. He joins them and feels the arm of his boyfriend and his sister hold him close as they sleep. When they get to Sabaody they see Law for the first time. They don't even get to talk really as everything happens.

Law might have a giant on his crew now but his siblings are dead.

Again.

Then he sees his siblings' captain claim Fire Fist as his brother with an army of Impel Down escapees. He knows the pain of losing siblings, many times over(Lami, Baby 5, Robin and Sanji twice over now) so he saves them. Barely, but he does. They are dropped off respectively to whoever is in charge of them. Law has a few revenge plots to settle and they'll only hinder him.

Robin and Sanji are able to meet up thanks to them both training under Revolutionaries. They don't even talk about the fact Sanji is cross dressing, the only thing they're talking about is seeing the crew again. And how much they've probably traumatized Law by "dying" again.

Of course when the crew reunites Luffy is over the moon to see his boyfriend. Nobody other than Luffy knows Robin and Sanji are siblings. Ace is there and amused by his brother's behavior with the cook. Ace goes to give Sanji a shovel talk but Robin says not to worry and that was covered ages ago. Zoro gives Ace a thumbs up which concerns him. They do their business on Fishman Island and head to Punk Hazard on Luffy's whim.

Of course the crew is split up and Law doesn't even hesitate to switch the bodies of whoever else is on Punk Hazard. Then he finds out it's the Strawhats and he may have just switched his baby brother into the cat burglar's body. Robin is acting like she doesn't know him outside of the news, which is fair, and he acts the same to the crew. Of course after all is said and done and he's unfortunately informed of how Straw Hat does alliances does really believe that Sanji fought Vergo and only suffered a broken leg, a building fell on his body at some point, Robin knows Fishman karate and they are not dead.

Again.

Law is very tired and very stressed.

And they don't even get to talk about it all that much because there's never a moment of just the three of them. It's annoying. Either a crew member, that samurai,or the kid, or the painter guy, or Caesar are within ear shot and he wants to throttle almost everyone. Then they arrive in Dressrosa and it kind of all goes to shit. Well not kind of, it just does. Law is going to fucking kill(almost) all of them if Doffy doesn't first. Listen, Law doesn't get how Sanji got to where he is physically, he'll figure that out later, but for now the cook needs to go and take Caesar to Zou!

Everything ends up fine. Sure he cut off his arm but he's fine, it's fine, they're heading to Zou after Ace and Luffy's other apparent brother is there, and alive. That's something they have in common Law guesses as they rest for the night and make their escape in the morning. Law is a control freak to the maximum extent so he's ready to get to Zou, see his crew and spend time with his family before they go after Kaido. Except Sanji's poster says only alive and the look he and Robin share is not a good one.

Of course Zou is a wreck because nothing is ever easy and Luffy is off doing something and Ace is chasing him. The Strawhats find out first Sanji was kidnapped first. Law is explaining to his crew that they can't like they're seeing long lost family because the Strawhats don't know. The Strawhats are dealing with finding out Sanji is gone. When they inform the Heart Crew of the plan to get Sanji, Robin and Law share another look as they depart. No one catches it. Not even Luffy. Law is engulfed in Bepo's arms as he shakes because he just got them back and they haven't been able to be together. Shachi and Penguin are looking ahead with a slight dissociation because they haven't been able to see them and talk to them as well. It sucks.

Robin goes with the rescue team and finds Sanji with the golden cuffs in the chariot. Held hostage by the same people who put him in that God awful helmet Law had to shambles off when he was eight. Robin is furious but not as furious as Luffy who is taking all the hits from his boyfriend without fighting back. Robin notes everything going on and when Sanji delivers food to Luffy and tries to fully leave the crew, Luffy is Luffy though. So a plan is devised to save them even as Robin gives the blond a look of disagreement. After all is said and done and they're leaving with Jinbei who has come to help. Robin threatens Judge for Law and her both when he's done belittling her brother for all of the good things about him.

When they make it to Wano and see everyone, Luffy immediately goes to fight Kaido much to everyone's exasperation. Law, Robin, and Sanji keep exchanging looks because they can't pin down time to talk to each other. Too much going on and Sanji feels responsible for Pedro's death and everything being behind schedule. Sanji uses his raid suit and Law is fucking losing his mind because what the fuck did he miss as he realizes where Sanji came from. Law knows he and Robin know these comics, they had read them before the storm separated them and Sanji did not like them. So that clicks in for Law like the Doflamingo bit clicked for them years ago.

After the raid, when Sanji is finally able to be pinned down after stressing about cooking the three of them manage to sit and talk. Of course it's not even ten minutes into the conversation that Luffy bursts in, yelling for Sanji. Law sets a room but Robin puts a hand on his and smiles at him sweetly as Luffy sits on Sanji's lap and then looks at them.

"No, no, we are not doing this with him." Law glowers.

"Ah, but we just started talking about my life after the storm." Robin grins at him as Law huffs. They catch up and Luffy, surprisingly, quietly listens as the three catch up. None of them are smiling necessarily, they have these half twitches sort of dragging the corners of their mouths. Even about Enies Lobby and Germa and Dressrosa they share things. Sabaody from Law's perspective is shocking, as is Marineford. Law asks if it's possible to go kill Judge with a thing and Robin laughs and assures the elder captain that the peace pact only applied to the Strawhat crew, so the Heart crew could absolutely go beat Judge to death with 'it' as Sanji sighs as Luffy starts whining about not being allowed to.

When they go find the crews Law tells his to 'have at them' as Bepo pulls Sanji and Robin close and holds them up and coos as Shachi and Penguin wrap their arms around them as others start asking questions. Newer Heart members who have only heard about them in passing and didn't understand why Law had their posters as the Strawhats just ask Luffy what's going on.

"Oh yeah, turns out Sanji and Robin are Law's brother and sister and were his first crew members until they got separated." Luffy shrugs.

"Are they leaving the crew?" Usopp asks in despair.

"Nah, they already tried that remember?" Luffy reminds him.

"I had every intent to get back." Sanji defends himself.

"That makes a lot of sense." Zoro says like he hadn't heard Sanji.

"You're dead, shitty moss." Sanji growls.

"I want a pelt of Bepo's fur to lay on forever." Robin hums as she burrows into the mink.

"I love you too, Robin." Bepo cheers.

"What about us?" Shachi and Penguin whine.

"Human pelts are good for books." Sanji answers. "I could make you both into cookbooks."

"All three of you are so creepy!" Ikkaku yells at them.

"You should have seen us when it was just us three." Law shrugs as the Strawhats start asking questions.

[readersandimagines]

Gone Missing - Chapter 1

Okay so this took me way too long to write! I decided to try and write it in first person but also still keep it neutral enough that a reader could place themselves in the story? I may scrap this and go back to 2nd or 3rd person we shall see! Sooo let me know what you think! Only other warning I have is I didn't proof read this and quickly put it together.

But uhh essentially you're Adam's sibling and he's been missing for three days too many so you do what any sensable human would do and go to the police station to report him missing. Dectective Hoffman is on the case ;3

It had been three days. Three days wondering where in the world my brother, Adam had gotten up to. I sighed, checking my phone for what felt like the hundredth time today. Still no callback. Maybe Adam just got busy, I thought trying to reassure myself that he was fine. The last time we spoke he told me about some ex cop that was paying him pretty good money, so maybe he was just busy with that?

“I can’t do this anymore!” I exclaimed, standing up to grab my coat.

I quickly locked the door to my apartment and headed out. I needed to stay calm, but my mind raced with too many thoughts to grab hold of anything. As I walked and held my phone close; Adam had exactly 20 minutes to call me before I reported him as a missing person. I knew he would be angry, but I couldn’t lose him. He was the only family I had left.

The autumn air was crisp as I started to walk along the street. Cars and people passed by continuing on their way. Their world continued to move forward while it felt like mine froze. I could feel a lump growing in my throat as I pushed the door open to enter the Metropolitan Police Department.

The front was unremarkable dead. A small lobby with a few chairs and a main desk with an officer to greet you. Taking a deep breath, I approached the desk mentally preparing to deal with whatever bullshit these guys could throw at me. As long as they help me find him that’s all that matters. 

“Name and case number?” the voice asked.

“Uhh… I don’t have one?” I answered, earning a sigh and annoyed glance from the man behind the desk.

Normally this man wouldn’t have bothered me so much. I would just sass him back and yet I couldn’t bring myself to do that. 

“You don’t have a name?” the cop asked a little louder, gaining some attention from people behind him.

“I have a name, but I don’t have a case number.” I responded, feeling my chest tighten. “I… need to file a missing persons case.”

“Sweetie people go missing every day in this town, you sure they didn’t just dump you?”

Anger, confusion, sadness. Each one leaving as quickly as it came. I couldn’t understand how walking into a police station was such a problem. The man behind the desk examined me, seeming to want to say something else before another man in a suit walked up. The two officers exchanged words briefly before the man in the suit walked over. I clenched my jaw, I knew I shouldn’t have come here. I would have better luck finding Adam myself than trusting these people.

“Detective Hoffman,” the man called, extending his rather large hand out to me.

“_________ Stanheight,” I answered, taking his hand into my own. 

He had a strong, but gentle handshake as he gestured to the chairs in the lobby. If this had been a regular day, I would have been having to contain my emotions as I looked over the detective. He had the brightest blue eyes and a nice smile. He wasn’t ripped like other cops, but he definitely seemed to be in shape. I just hoped he could help me find Adam.

“I couldn’t help but overhear,” Detective Hoffman said, gesturing towards the front desk. “What makes you think someone is missing?”

“I don’t think anyone is missing. I know my brother Adam is missing. We talk everyday and now I can’t get in touch with him,” I huffed, my annoyance starting to grow as the detective nodded, pulling a notebook out of his pocket.

“Adam huh? How long has it been since you spoke? Could he just not have his phone?” he asked, earning a glare from me.

“It’s been three days. Look, I know he’s missing. We talk everyday. And one of your officers hired him to follow some doctor--” I snapped before he cut me off.

“One of our officers?” 

“Yes! Some old guy-- Bob Tapp? I think?” I exclaimed, mentally kicking myself for not getting the name when Adam had originally told me.

“Detective Tapp? But he’s dea--” the original guy from the desk started to say before Hoffman cut him off.

“All the more reason to take their information,” he said sharply.

“D-dead?” I stammered, my eyes widening. “No, you have to be mistaken, Adam just got hired by this guy.”

Everything around me felt like it was spinning. If the guy that hired Adam was dead-- no Adam couldn’t be dead. My thoughts grew louder and I couldn’t focus. Time seemed to freeze. I could feel tears filling my eyes before I felt a strong, but firm touch on my shoulder bringing me back to reality for a moment.

“Hey, I need you to calm down. We will do everything we can to find your brother,” Hoffman said firmly.

“He can’t die,” I whispered, trying desperately to stop the flood gates trying to open. “He’s… the only family I have left.”Hoffman’s face softened briefly and he nodded like he understood what I felt. I needed to calm down. I needed to give him the information. But I also desperately needed to go out and start my own search. It felt like the wind had been knocked from beneath my sails and yet all I could do was focus on one singular thought: Adam could be in serious danger.

[charlie-lec-stories]

PR's biggest mess // CL16

Pairing: Charles Leclerc/Russell!sister

Summary: Lea Russell was the first F1 female driver, making history for the women’s movement in the racing world. But when things got more and more complicated, her life became a constant PR mess.

Chapter's Warnings: Some suggested sexual activity, not described though. Descriptions of a panic attack. Mention of an accident.

Author's Note: This one is a long one-shot. Hope you like it.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

When George made his first steps into the karting world, Lea always followed behind. They were close in age, she was 10 months older but since she was constantly getting into trouble, people would often say that she looked younger. It didn't help when George hit puberty and started growing in height, it seemed like he would never stop, finally ending with an over ten centimeters of difference over his older sister. They always felt like twins, doing everything together, sharing friends, classes and even sometimes clothes. Karting became a shared passion that them both used as a stress reliever during their teenage years. Lando Norris and Alex Albon were close to the Russell siblings, the four of them going for lunch every weekend after karting.

Years passed and the three boys made their debuts in F1, Lea staying behind. There were many factors that kept her away from the tracks, there was a gender bias and she was well aware of it. People would never pay the same attention to her as they paid to her brother. She learned to live with that, so she looked for other ways to stay close to the tracks. She went to college, got a degree on engineering and mastered on physics and mechanics, then she proceeded to make her way into a team. McLaren were the ones interested in what she had to offer. While the boys raced, she worked on the cars. With her masters, she quickly became Race Engineer and started working with Lando. The two made a fantastic team, she would guide him swiftly through the races, and he would listen carefully to what she had to say.

Her technics were odd, she would constantly be taking notes, calculating things and no one knew exactly what went through her head. All they knew was that whenever she grabbed the pencil and chanted numbers at Lando, he would go faster and cleaner through the tracks. That was the reason everyone was nervous when she looked so worried one Thursday night, no numbers on her pages, only pencil smudged everywhere from using her eraser so much. Lando was the one worried the most. It was his best championship so far, with an easy third place on the grid and 9 podiums. Lewis Hamilton was close behind on the fourth place and Charles Leclerc was extremely close to him on the second place. He needed to win if he wanted to leave Hamilton behind and keep up with Leclerc. Leclerc and Max Verstappen were close to each other, by a just two points difference, so Lando believed that if he could win at least three of the five races left and get second place on the other two, he could be champion. His Race Engineer losing it was the last thing he needed.

"Tell me what do you need and we'll do it, Lee". Lando was willing to do whatever she needed. He could see her calculating things inside her head, her eyes moving frantically around the screen in front of her, full of data about the car, the track and a bunch of things he had no idea what they meant.

"I need to test it". She said out loud, but Lando wasn't sure if she was talking to him or not, she had been mumbling things for hours. They were practically alone on the circuit by that point. Max, who was Lando’s close friend and fellow driver, and Cristian Horner, Max’s boss, were also there at the Red Bull Racing garage doing the same as Lando and Lea, trying to get the last touches done before the first free practice session.

"What is it you need to test?". Lea looked at him and he knew exactly the kind of mess they could get into. "We're gonna get fired. No, Russell". He said shaking his head. There was no way she was driving the car. “That’s what they pay me for”.

“You can’t drive until tomorrow and I would never send you out there with something I’m not sure about”. She of course felt responsible for his life, she was well aware that he trusted her and she wanted to keep that trust.

“That’s unsafe for you too then”. He was not letting it go easy. “If it dangerous for me it is for you too”. She gave him a look of warning. “I’m not suggesting I’m a better driver. I just want us to get out of here in one piece… and not jobless”.

"I need to make sure, and if this gets you the championship, then we'll never get fired". She took Lando’s second race suit and a the whole head security gear.

Lando won that race but didn't win the championship, he finished in third place. Still, that night gave Lea the best contract of her life when Horner saw her drive.

She felt like it was the craziest dream, the pictures, the merchandising, the press. Everyone wanted a piece of her. Max was the only one who could get it, he was her light in the darkness of the sea of people. And for Max, Lea was like fresh air, she was the first teammate that he didn't want to push out of the track. They worked good together and PR saw that as the best way to sell the team. As friends, they were a little uncomfortable with PR's strategy, flirting for fun was natural, they were both flirty people, but the touching was a little too much for them. Hands needed to be on each other constantly, and that wasn't something they liked. She needed to be a lot of things: a good girl with the cocky personality of a bad girl, sexy but not sexual, straightforward but no impolite, cheerful but not annoying. There were a lot of expectations on her and too much of something or too little of anything could mean the biggest fisco for Red Bull. PR knew how important it was to have the first female F1 driver ever on their hands and they didn't want to mess it up. Lea had to be the face and heart of Red Bull, there was no place for something else. She was forbidden from cheering for her brother, Lando or their teams. Alex and Charles, who were good friends for her too, became off limits, she could never be associated to other team other than Red Bull, so Max was the only real contact she had.

Getting P3 on her first race was the most epic moment of her life. The battle with Charles for second place would win awards as the best moment of racing for many decades later, the monegasque winning literally by the distance of the size of a tyre. The celebration was crazy, Max and Charles showered her in champagne while her brother screamed her name and jumped excited. Everyone was out of their minds, the first female driver got a podium on her first race. She wasn't just making history, she was a whole movement. There were little girls dreaming of being her. Things were going too fast for her, and after just four races she found herself running away from everyone. Her chest closing as her head felt heavier. Her trembling legs were taking her to her brother's trailer the best they could, she needed him so fuck PR, but the dizziness that clouded her mind was too much for her. Heart pounding out of her chest, vision almost black she stumbled into the first trailer she could find. Once the door was close, she let the panic take over her. Her body fell to the floor once her legs finally gave up.

"It's okay. Breath with me". She heard the voice but couldn't even process who was talking to her, so she just assumed it was George. She gripped at him for dear life, feeling like she could die any moment. The arms that wrapped around her pressed her so tight she actually felt like she was snapping out of whatever state she was in. She felt him breath and tried to follow him. The voice became more clear, guiding her breathing at the top of her head, and the rest of her senses started coming back with each deep breath. When she was finally able to smell, she noticed that the person wasn't George. She lived her whole life with him and she could recognize her brother with her eyes closed anytime once she was feeling like herself again. Her foggy vision subsided and she saw the red and black clothing on the good samaritan that helped her. "Are you feeling better?". Charles voice filled the air, his hands going up and down her back and his voice vibrating on her face that was tightly pressed against his chest.

"Yes". She managed to squeal out and she felt him kiss the top of her head. She always found Charles nice, but he was pretty shy around her and she never expected him to be this affectionate. She wasn't complaining though. "Thank you. I'm sorry. I didn’t mean to intrude into your trailer. I was actually looking for Georgie". She could feel him laughing softly, it warmed her inside, discarding some of the embarrassment she felt for the whole situation.

"It's okay. I'm glad I could help, even though I'm not George". They stayed like that for a moment, silently breathing through their noses to lower their heart rates. Both of them for different reasons, but Charles had no plans on letting her know that. "Do you want to talk about it?". He asked on her hair, trying to ignore the fuzzy feeling on his chest brought by the closeness. He then tried to pull away a little to look at her face, but she grabbed his race suit tight and forced him back onto her.

"Please, don't go, I think I could fall apart any minute". She sounded so desperate he couldn't help but pull her even closer.

"I'm not going anywhere, Lee". She sighed in relief, her face still buried on his suit. He sat more comfortably on the floor, bringing her to his lap and they stayed like that. "You can always come to me if you need to".

And so she did. When things got too much, she would sneak into his trailer and they would lay on the small couch, chests pressed together, her face buried on his neck while they talked about nothing and everything. They would avoid each other in public, like oil and water, only talking when it was necessary and then they would let everything out when they were alone. He could feel his hands aching whenever they were close on the paddock, and Max's would go up and down her arm while they talked. He wasn't sure about their situation. But he knew that what they secretly had couldn’t be something that Max could be okay with. Why don't go to Max when she felt like escaping? They seemed so close and she always talked so good about him when they were cuddling. Why was she sneaking into his trailer when she could openly go to Max's? Why would she need him when she obviously had Max eagerly willing to get close and she always let him? Too many questions he didn't have the guts to ask.

PR got a little more indulgent with time. Around Silverstone time was also Lea's birthday and she was allowed to celebrate however she wanted since she was doing great on the championship, but she had to at least post a picture or story with Max. If there was something she was grateful for was that her friendship with Max was strong, otherwise they would have hated each other by then. Fans were shipping them together and PR was constantly shoving them onto each other, it was exhausting. For her birthday, Lea decided to invite some of her closest friends to her home in London for a night of partying. She could finally let loose of all of the tension. Max, Charles, Alex, Lando, George, Carlos and Pierre, with the girlfriends of those who weren't single, were all gathered around a fire on her back yard. Jokes and bottles of different brewages were exchanged between the group. Max and Lea published their picture together and then immediately went on their different ways, Max sat next to Lando to plan their getaway for the summer break, while she sat next to a pretty drunk Charles, who was missing the upper three buttons of his shirt and was loudly laughing at something Pierre had said in french. It seemed that what he had on his glass was good, so she poured some on a glass for herself, and then another... and another, and another.

"You shouldn't drive". Was the first thing that left Pierre's lips when he saw Charles looking up at him to say goodnight. "Maybe you should stay here, man".

"I have a guest room". Lea said in between sips of whatever was on her glass at the moment. George got up and took the glass away from her.

"You should slow this down, sis". She smiled and nodded her head. It wasn’t the first time they partied together and they both knew how she got with alcohol. They also knew that she would drink again once George went out the door, but that warning gave him the excuse to scold her later, while the worst hungover ever ached inside her head.

Once everyone was out, Lea plopped down next to Charles on the couch. Her eyes felt heavy and her skin cold. She was falling asleep when Charles started getting up from the couch. She looked at him for a moment, slightly sobering up from the realisation of what he was doing when she saw him reach for his jacket, wallet and phone.

"You're going...?". She wasn't sure if she was asking or not. Charles looked back at her. He knew he was going to cross a line if he stayed. There was this caged desire inside his chest for years and it really wanted to get out. He was dying to kiss her.

"Max won't be happy if I stay". Max and him might be rivals who were constantly fighting each other for almost everything and they were extremely petty about it, but he wasn't playing with something as serious as a relationship. He would hate to be on Max's end of the situation. They must have been a lot more serious that what she had with Charles for them to be so openly touchy and post about each other all the time. She furrowed her eyebrows and looked at the fire, as if trying to connect the dots.

"Why would he be mad?"

"Aren't you... something?". He emphasised the word 'something', since he wasn't sure what they were.

"We're friends and teammates". She said giggling a little. "Damn, we're better at acting than I expected". Her words flew into his drunken mind with some difficulty. "I never thought you would buy into that PR shit".

"PR?". He felt stupid asking, but he wasn't exactly on his smartest state to process information.

"It's fake". She assured him, sneaking her arms around his neck, feeling a lot bolder thanks to the alcohol. "We're just touchy because Karen at PR told us to. Well, more like she forced us to. Max and I are just friends, really good friends, but just that". She smiled up at him. "I don't want you to be my friend, Charlie".

Once the words sank into his brain, his lips crashed on hers. Finally, all that pent up want was out. His hands went to her ass and squeezed, signaling her to wrap her legs around his waist. She followed the command eagerly. Before they both could process what was happening, they were lying on the couch inside the house, him on top of her, leaving a trail of kisses down her neck and chest. Her hands went under his shirt, ready for the only birthday gift she was actually wishing for. The next morning they woke up to the faint light of the raising sun coming through the back yard glass door. Charles was the first one up, running one of his hands up and down her arm while he covered his eyes with the other. His hungover was killing him. She stirred a bit on his chest, releasing a whine when the sun kissed her eyes. The sound reminded him of the night before, a smile appearing instantly on his face. On his chest, he could feel her smiling too.

After three months and a summer break of sneaking around for make-out sessions, sex and cute dates, they finally had to let PR know. They were sure of their relationship, and wanted everyone to know. They haven't even told their families and Lea felt awful for lying to her bother. She had never lied to George before, not even for the most embarrassing things, so lying about something as great as her relationship with Charles was painful for her. Charles wanted to tell his mother like crazy, he was on the best time of his life, winning races, loving the woman he liked since he met George, and the car was on its prime. Again, he was close to be world champion. Max had the same points than him, but Charles was leading on winnings. He just had to keep winning, and he totally felt like he could. He looked at Lea before opening the door, kissing her one last time. Outside, he checked no one was around the trailer's area and let her go. She walked straight to her PR's office, searching for Karen.

To say that the conversation was awful would be an understatement. Lea was even surprised that Karen could raise her voice to the level she did and even though Lea has always been someone to stand up for herself, she could barely say a word. Charles didn't have much luck with his agent either. The point was clear: They couldn't date a rival, it wasn't good for business, and the whole market worked around competition and rivalry. Max and Charles had a long history of pressing each other's buttons, Lea dating Charles was like treason to Red Bull. It also didn't look good for a raising driver to be romantically involve with another driver, it made things messy and made her look like she 'got the seat sucking the right guys', Karen's words exactly. One thing was flirting with Max and a whole another was officially dating a fellow driver. The pair found themselves under the most intense scrutiny, purposely booked on different interviews and placed away from each other on public events. Lea's spirits were going down by the day and Max was more than capable of noting the change on his friend's aura.

"What is it, Lee?". He asked her once he quietly took her to his drivers room. She just looked at him tired, like the flame usually burning inside her was nearly dead. "You've been losing power lately".

"That's nonsense, Max. I'm fine". She tried to get out but he placed his hand on her shoulder. He didn't press or forced her to stop, she just obeyed the motion, like a robot.

"You're not". He made her turn around and look him in the eyes. "You're my friend, we've known each other for years and you're the only person I talk to every day. I know you". He could see the guilt pass her eyes momentarily, so he kept talking. "I know that for the last few months something really good must have happened to you. I've never seen you so happy, not even after your first race. I was waiting for you to bring it up yourself and tell me, but seeing you so down I wonder-"

"I'd tell you, Max". She cut him off. "God knows I'd tell you, but I would literally get fired. Plus, I don't think you'd be happy if you knew".

"Try me". He sat on the bed and grabbed her hand to make her sit with him. "I know I have a temper, but I won't get mad. And I won’t tell anyone that you told me. I promise".

"I am- was- am. I don't even know anymore". She stopped and took a deep breath. "I'm dating Charles". She could see his brain working. He made a face of slight disgust, he definitely wasn't a fan of the idea. His teammate and closest friend dating his rival and a guy he didn't have the best relationship with. Charles was usually nice and he tried to be nice back, but he daydreamed a lot about Leclerc losing and DNFing for him to like the idea of him and Lea dating. "You're not the only one who made that face". He was about to justify himself when she kept talking. "Don't worry, I get it. It's okay, I didn't expect you to love the concept". Max relaxed a bit. "PR doesn't love it either. They have been suggesting me, rather intensely, to break up with him".

"And what do you want?".

"I want Charles".

Max went from hating the idea to fan number one. He would make up almost any excuse to keep people busy and give her a small window to see Charles. The Ferrari golden boy also talked to his teammate, Carlos, who was more than eager to help. Lea knew that she had to come clean with George, the fact that other people knew before him was eating her alive. But when the conversation finally happened, George took the news way different from what she expected.

"I know". He said chuckling. They were on her hotel room in Spain, sitting on the bed while eating homemade biscuits that their mother sent. She furrowed her eyebrows. "I guessed it since your birthday, you were too comfortable with each other. You two weren't like that before. Plus, Charles has liked you for ages, I already knew that too".

"You never told me that!". He just shrugged his shoulders.

"It was not my place, and you never told me you liked him. If you had just told me, I would have done something about it!". He raised his hands up in defence.

"I didn't thought of him like that before. We kinda hit it off this year". She blushed and George giggled only to be rewarded with a pillow to his face.

Ferrari's PR was ready to give Charles a free pass when he won the championship against Max, but they weren't exactly keen to give him the only pass he actually wanted. Tired of hiding, he finally told his mother and brothers and before they both knew it, the circle of people knowing the secret became larger than they expected. The holidays came and Lea decided to spend them in Monaco and her family was okay with that. They took a few pictures with the outfits before she went to Monte Carlo, so they could post them online and keep the façade for her. Christmas with the Leclerc's were great, she got to hang out with Charles' brothers and finally they got some time alone at Charles' apartment. They enjoyed every second of it. They celebrated Charles' first championship and their six months together.

Before they knew it, another championship started and Lea had a real chance to win. The races became more and more interesting, with Lea, Charles and Max constantly fighting for the top. The three of them were highly equipped to win and they weren't slowing down. With a secret relationship and the championship competition, Lea and Charles were constantly pent up and they became less careful when sneaking around. The first picture that appeared online was of a terrible quality, so most people assumed it was fake. But it was a close call: They needed to do something about it. People started to suspect that something was happening and PR's stunt of Max and Lea wasn't selling anymore. They did the best they could to turn things down a notch, but they were playing with fire and at some point, they were going to burn themselves.

It all started with a crash. It wasn’t a big one, but it meant a DNF for Charles and Max, who were pretty heated up about it. They started their argument on the track, next to their cars, shoving each other while throwing accusations partially muffed by the helmets. Nothing got recorded since they were already disconnected from their radios, but it was clear that it was an intense discussion since Charles ended up falling butt first to the grass from a particular hard push from Max. Things kept escalating once they reached the garages. There was no calming them down. People was used to them exploding at each other, but they have never gotten that physical. Their helmets were off and their voices could be hear clearly. The race had still 15 laps to go and the teams were doing the best they could to control the situation in the garage while still concentrating on Carlos and Lea who were fighting each other for first position, left to their reach with their teammates’ DNFs. Max was completely out of it, he was already pissed from last year’s loss of the championship, and this was the last thing he needed to jump at Charles’ throat. On his end, Charles’ was uncomfortable with Max and Lea’s public image and he could barely stand whatever Max did. The race finished with Lea in the front and Max was trying to be forced to the podium to be a good teammate and support the winner, but things were too out of control and Max’s desire to hurt Charles got the best of him.

“You did it on purpose. You’re just jealous of me and you know it”. He could see the fire in Charles’ eyes and that only fuelled him up to keep pushing. “You’re scared she will leave you for me”. Max had no interest in dating Lea, he knew it, she knew it, but he also knew that the comment would make a large wound on Charles’ pride. The moment the comment hit the air everyone stopped what they were doing. Charles, initially taken aback, broke the silence.

“Take that back!”. Before he could launch himself at Max -again- he was dragged inside the Ferrari garage and forced to his driver’s room. Max, on the other side, was suddenly changing his mood, running into the Red Bull garage by himself, well aware of the implications of what he had just done. He silently preyed for the argument not to have been recorded, but he knew that it was, people loved drama and their argument was the perfect show for all the cameras present. All hell broke loose. He didn’t just outed his friend’s relationship to the media, he also made it seen like he was involved in the whole thing as wanting to be a possible candidate for her. PR was going to kill him or, worse, fire him. But whatever they’d do to him would be nothing compared to Lea’s rage when she’d find out. He had to tell her himself, before things kept going down further.

Showered in champagne, she walked to the garage followed by the cameras and the press. She was so happy that she didn’t even try to listen to what the press was asking her, she just wanted to get her ice bath and sneak into Charles’ trailer to have the best sex of her life. But her track of thinking was suddenly interrupted by a very worried Max that was running towards her. Before she could make her way towards him, Charles appeared by her side. She turned around to greet him, maybe ask him how he was feeling after the DNF, but his hands grabbed her face and he crashed his lips in hers before she could actually say ‘hi’. Since the first time they kissed she was physically unable to resist, she just loved to kiss him too much to ever say no, so her first reaction was to instinctively kiss back. Her hands went to his chest as Charles moved his lips on hers kind of desperate. The moment of clearness came and she moved away, Charles almost falling forward for how much he was pressing into her. She all of sudden became aware of the cameras and the people yelling at them. She sent Charles a warning look but he wasn’t even staring a her to notice. His jaw was clenched and his eyes were focussed on the garage to her side. She followed his gaze and saw a scared Max looking back at Charles. She quickly gripped Charles’ arm and pulled him towards the Red Bull garage and to her driver’s room, motioning for Max to follow them, who walked behind the pair looking down at his feet and cussing under his breath in Dutch.

“What was all of that about?”. She asked once the door was closed behind Max. None of them said anything, Charles kept his eyes glued to Max, while the other tried to keep as much physical distance with the Ferrari driver as possible. He was actually worried about his safety, he knew he crossed a line and he could see himself paying for it. “I asked a question, gentlemen”. Lea continued, her voice hard and cold.

“I messed up”. Max admitted looking down. “I pushed Charles’ buttons on the wrong matter”.

“What happened?”. She was now looking at them more worried than pissed.

“What happens it that your teammate wants to fuck you, that’s what happens”. Charles said through gritted teeth. She could feel the anger radiating from him. Charles wasn’t a jealous person at all, it was actually weird to see him that possessive, so it had to be a pretty direct comment for Charles to get to that point. She knew he was as uncomfortable with her and Max’s PR stunt as they were themselves, but they talked about it plenty of times and he always understood.

“What are you talking about, baby? We’ve talked about this. Max and I are just friends”. There was this hurt expression mixed with the anger on Charles’ face and she could see that he was feeling like shit under his threatening demeanour.

“Seems like he didn’t got the memo, because he’s sure that you’ll leave me for him”. Max sighed loudly and Lea moved her attention from Charles to her teammate, her confusion clear on her face.

“I didn’t mean it, I swear. I know it’s no excuse, but I just wanted to make you mad. I was furious, I shouldn’t have said that. It’s not true, Charles”. The other softened his expression a little, but he was still loudly breathing through his nose. “I wanted you to hurt, like the championship hurt for me last year. I crossed a line”.

“You did”. Was all that Charles left out, his shoulders a little more relaxed and his gaze moving from Max to Lea. “I’m sorry for making a scene, Lee”.

“Me too”. Max added. “And I’m sorry for what I said earlier, Charles. I really am”.

“You two being sorry won’t solve this mess”. Now it was her turn to be furious. “You two outed something that we weren’t allow to out. Our jobs, our sponsors and my bloody fucking career are on the line here! You’re men, you can give two shits about your reputation and someone will always support you. I don’t have that privilege. Karen will have our heads on sticks outside by night. You fell into this testosterone pitty party and I’m the one who got burned!”. Both men looked at the floor. “Get out. Both of you. I need time to think”. With that, they walked out of the room. Outside, photographers pictured the battled men walking side by side silently. They sat on the floor of the garage, backs against Max’s broken car, facing the door of Lea’s driver’s room. They spent fifteen minutes in silence, until they saw George get into the garage, his pissed off expression fired at them when he saw them. Max tried to speak up, but George shook his head and raised his hand to shut him up. The younger Russell kept walking and entered his sister’s room.

“They’re gonna get the cold shoulder for a while. I don’t care how much time they camp outside this door”. He said once inside the room. His sister was laying down on her little bed and he sat on the floor in front of her.

“You’re kidding, right?”. Her brother answered no with his head making a groan leave her immediately.

“They’re sitting outside. Actually, I think I never saw them this quiet around each other, like, ever”. She chuckled at the comment. “Their ‘I-am-truly-sorry-I-was-a-cunt-please-forgive-me’ faces are pretty good though”. He added, earning a full laugh from his sister this time.

“Thanks for always making everything better, Georgie”. She said once her laugh subsided. Her brother smiled big and giggled a bit.

“That’s what brothers are for, sis”.

The press conference post race was messy. Carlos, who got second place wasn’t even asked one question, Lando’s presence and his third place weren’t acknowledged at all, and Lea was only asked about her personal life. She had to explain that she had a recent, she had to lie there, relationship with Charles and that since Max and him didn’t get along pretty well, they would usually say things they didn’t mean to get into each other’s nerves. Karen made her say that it was all too new and that they were still trying to see if things worked out. PR decided to explore the ‘jealousy trope’ for a bit to see if it could help to raise the tension of the competition. Lea wasn’t comfortable at all with that, but she was well aware of who she could piss of and who she couldn’t. Charles and Max refused interviews and they both posted apologies on their social medias to address their fight on the track, explaining that the adrenaline of the race sometimes leads to things getting out of control and that they were really sorry for what happened. It was a half truth and they were satisfied with that, after all, driving at 300 kph was for sure something difficult to get down from, the high being too high not to come down with a crash.

“What do you want, Charles?”. Asked George that night when he opened his sister’s hotel room door after hearing the monegasque knocking on it non-stop.

“Is Lee here?”. He said timidity. George had always seemed to him like the sweetest guy ever, but the look he was giving him was anything but sweet. If looks could kill, Charles would be visiting the Titanic for eternity.

“You already gave her your half-assed apology”. George was being way meaner that he needed to be, but he really wanted to make Charles suffer before letting the matter go.

“You can let him in, Georgie”. Lea authorised from inside the room. George moved aside to let Charles in, grabbed his jacket and walked out of the room, not before telling his sister to call if she needed him and throwing Charles a nasty glare. “What do you want, Charles?”. She repeated her brother’s greeting with the same tone but a higher pitch.

“I want you to forgive Max”. Charles answered while he shifted his weight from foot to foot. “He’s your friend and the truth is that I said awful things to him too and it was wrong of me to do that. I pushed too hard and made him mad”. Lea saw the video of their fight, she didn’t know what was said when they had their helmets on, but she saw that Max was the one who outed the relationship and by far the most pissed off, even pushing Charles to the ground at some point. Charles taking the blame for Max was definitely new. “I know that he’s important to you and I don’t want you to lose a friendship because I couldn’t keep my mouth shut. I’m sorry for all the mess I put you through”.

“It’s interesting”. She said when she saw him walk towards the door after a moment of silence that he took as a refuse to listen to him. “Max came here an hour ago telling me something different”. She continued. That caught Charles’ attention. “He told me that I should forgive YOU, because it was all his fault, that you are a great guy and would be a real shame if I’d let you pass me by”. Charles frowned in confusion, Max talking his side wasn’t a common sight.

“He did?”. She nodded her head. After a long sigh, she patted the spot on the bed next to her and he took a seat. He looked at her in the eyes, trying to figure out if he was forgiven or not. Since the answer wasn’t clear, he choose to ask. “And did you follow his advice?”. Lea smiled and nodded again. He copied the motion and kissed her tenderly, already feeling the weight on his shoulders subside a little.

“I will follow yours too. But I will give you the same condition I gave Max”. She said once they broke the kiss. Charles nodded and she kept talking. “I want you to get along with him. There’s a lot that I can’t do, this world is ruled by politics that are way bigger than us. It’s full of pressures that make me do things I don’t want to do. It’s a lot, Charlie, and if I can do just one thing to make my life easier, this is it. I want to keep you both. I want my friend and I want you”. She looked down, another sigh leaving her lips. “I’m already PR’s press puppet for as long as I keep racing. I want to keep close the last few things that still remain real”.

“Deal”. He said without doubt. Max had sticked his neck for him earlier and got him forgiven, so the least he could do was try and be nice to him. He could see how much pressure Lea was under, how making history as the first female F1 driver also implied giving herself to whatever political wave was currently controlling the market without a say. He didn’t want to be a burden, on the contrary, he wanted to be forever one of those things that remained real.

“Good”. She smiled. “Now start taking this shirt off”. She said pulling at the hem of his shirt. “Today I won and I want my price”. He let out a chuckle and took off his shirt. Then, he kissed her, grabbing her by the waist and lying on top of her, a giggle from her slipping between their lips.

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

Hi, I’m back. I’m leaving this one-shot here for you guys. It’s pretty long. I know that the series are still ongoing, it’s just that the next two chapters need a lot of change to fit the F1 plot and I haven’t been inspired to change those lately, so here’s this one that was a lot easier to change. I hope you like it.

[angelsworks]

Hello, a while ago I requested a second part of lost obsession for the yandere brothers mikaelson.

Lost Darling Yandere!Mikaelson Brother x reader (separate)

Type: Headcannon

Kind of a part two to this ask

Summary: After some time with your yandere they grow tired of you for one reason or another only to feel regretful later on.

Warnings: Yandere themes, unhealthy relationships, death.

Note: For anyone else who has had this happen please re-request so I’ve got some way to track it. Sometimes if you request in a message I forget. I don’t mean to of course. But an ask would really help in future. Thank you ❤️

Klaus Mikaelson

Following from the previous ask he’d moved on and left you. Well not officially of course. He still came and went as he pleased. Not letting you move on, but not giving you any sort of real relationship with him.

You fell into a state of being lost and confused. Everything Klaus had twisted and made you believe was false. It was hard to live such a solitary life. Knowing that any relationship you did form Klaus would still ruin somehow.

His version of always and forever ended when it came to you. That was what hurt the most. That for 1000 years he’d stood by his siblings and put them before anything else. Then after a questionable start to your relationship he’d made you believe you were in that category. A person he would move heaven and earth for.

It was sometime after the last visit from Klaus. The space between visits could be anywhere from days to months. It made you question time and any thoughts of leaving him.

Yet the constant limbo of emotions was too much for you. Leading you to plan an escape. Well not really an escape when your captor was no longer interested in you.

You knew it was guilt more than anything that kept Klaus coming back to you. He didn’t really love you anymore. He’d found someone new, a new obsession to love and pour all his affection into.

Despite his many promises of forever and eternal life, in the end you were only a play thing to him, something he easily tossed aside when things got boring.

When Klaus returns months later after enough guilt has built up inside him, he finds the house empty. No note, no number, no scent of you.

From this he assumes the worst. That you’ve been taken by some of his enemies. It takes him a few moments to realise no one knows where you are.

The very last thing he thinks of is that you’ve left by your own accord. The idea stays with him and bothers him more than it should.

His current obsession suffers your previous fate. He loses interest in them and it causes them to be tossed aside. He can’t get the idea of you out of his head and he needs to get you back.

He spends the next few months going through his contacts to try and find you. In the end he inevitably does. Not that you were trying to hide.

He’s surprised by what he finds. It’s you but a more competent, independent and confident version of you. He’s not sure if he likes it or not.

When he confronts you about leaving you spew out your well thought out arguments against him. Telling him that he can’t use you like a toy and that whatever relationship the two of you have had is over.

He doesn’t take it well, but he sees that you’ve changed in his absence.

It could go one of two ways. He could leave you and forever think of you as the one that got away.

Or he could fall back into his obsession with you. Stalking you and trying to understand everything about this new version of you. As you’ve definitely changed compared to the last time he did this.

Elijah Mikaelson

Like Klaus, Elijah had set you up in your own house - all expenses paid.

Unlike Klaus, he’s chosen to sever all ties with you.

You your new found loneliness independence, you’ve learnt to do everything by yourself again. You quite enjoy the new life you lead away from Elijah’s thumb.

You’ve got enough money to last for a long time thanks to Elijah. A town is close enough that you can walk to it from your house. The town is filled with people you can now talk to freely.

You almost feel thankful that elijah found someone else. Although you were at first incredibly hurt and shocked by the news, it seems to have turned out for the best. Regardless of the new impenetrable walls that now sit around your heart.

Elijah thinks this new obsession is what he wants. As time goes on he finds himself becoming more agitated and less composed with them. He finds everything they do to be wrong in some way, too annoying, too loud, too not you.

He realises a few months down the line that no amount of dressing them up in clothes similar to the ones you used to wear or calling them your nickname will make them you.

Despite his process of dealing with his obsession being identical to how he dealt with you, it doesn’t create an identical version of you.

So after much compulsion and compensation he moves on from that obsession and seeks you out once more.

He expects to see you as a shell of your former self. He feels waves of guilt at the image of you curled up in a ball, tears in your eyes, bones visible from lack of food, waiting at the door for him.

When he gets to the door, he doesn’t see you there. He doesn’t see you anywhere in the house.

He panics and tracks your scent. Following it to a nearby town where he sees you floating around freely, eyes wide with wonder as you appraise various items at the market, rays of sun getting trapped amongst the strands of your hair.

You definitely has not starved, your body was as perfect as the day he first saw you. He could feel him falling back into his obsession.

Only now he had to win you back in some way.

Kol Mikaelson

Maybe all the murder sprees and drinking don’t help him move on. Instead he always falls back to you.

After a lot of thinking he comes up with the idea of resurrecting you some how.

He seeks out witches and forces asks them to bring you back. To which they have to agree.

When your back you remember little. You know you felt ill and very tired before you fell asleep.

With your missing knowledge Kol decides to pretend you had just fallen asleep. Never mind the fact that you had died.

He decides to be a lot nicer to you. Knowing now how fragile you can be. Life becomes a lot nicer after the ordeal. Kol may even decide to change you to prevent any further mishaps.

Finn Mikaelson

He missed you.

After leaving you to inevitably die in a cave you can’t escape from, he feels bad. More than bad he feels horrible. Like he’s the cruelest being on earth.

After little self control and seeing the error of his ways he comes back to the cave.

Only to find that he was to late. Either due to natural or unnatural causes you had died.

Being alone with no hope of escape in a cave had gotten the best of you.

He can’t bring himself to try and resurrect you. He feels he’s put you through enough already. His obsession dies here.

He might even sought out some white oak stake if guilt becomes too much.

[voloslobotomyservice]

Elias Blackwood

(he/him)

Class: Oathbreaker of Devotion Paladin

Race: High Half-Elf

Age: 32 years

Background: Folk Hero

Game Progression: Middle of Act 3

Elias grew up in the small village of Goldenfield, raised by his mother and father. Mama took care of the home while Papa, a cavalier, would go away on crusade. He also has one younger sister, Elora, who was born eight years after he was. After his father failed to return home from a crusade, he decided to devote his life to becoming the best paladin he possibly could. He trained for years, practicing on his dummy and fighting off monsters and fiends to keep his hometown safe, while also helping his mother raise his sister, who was only three when their father passed. When he was in his early twenties, Elias moved to Baldur’s Gate to start his career as a paladin. His first night in the city, he went to The Blushing Mermaid and met Leila, a rogue half elf. Although they were never in a relationship, he considers her to be his first love. They were in each other's lives for over ten years, even sharing a home and a bed together. One day, the two were out on a mission beyond the city limits and were attacked by a pack of gnolls. Leila lost her life in this fight, and Elias blames himself for her death. If he had just been a bit more courageous, didn’t miss his swings, then he could have saved her. Leila currently serves as his Dream Guardian, adding on to his ever-building grief after losing her.

In Act I, Elias makes a poor lapse of judgement and decided to attack a bugbear in the goblin camp. The creature wasn’t aggravated, but he thought that it would if he stayed around long enough, so he wanted to get the battle over with. Because of his actions, he broke his Oath of Devotion. The Oathbreaker Paladin paid him a visit, and gifted him Oathbreaker powers, along with a slightly altered (hotter) look.

Just outside of Rosymond Monastary, Elias (32) ran into Elora (24), who he had not seen in over ten years. They would still write letters to keep in touch, but she became worried when he stopped returning her letters. Worried for the worst, Elora set off to go find her brother and hopefully bring him back to Goldenfield, as their mother had fallen ill and needed his help. She had wanted to be just like her older brother and trained to become a strong fighter. Elora asks to join her brother's party and to help with whatever mission they are on. Elias accepts, adding her to the troupe with open arms and a strange story about how a tadpole was placed in his head. (If she could she'd probably want to romance Karlach but this page isn't about her!!!)

Over the course of his adventures, he’s had three hair styles: short and trimmed, a little loose, and all grown out

Near the middle of Act 3, Elora received a sending from a family friend that their mother has passed away. She is devastated due to the loss and takes it out on her brother, because he refused to go back home to spend her final days as a family. Elias tried to explain that his life was at risk with the tadpole and that removing it was his number one priority. Their conflict drove a wedge in their sibling relationship, and they didn’t speak for days. They finally spoke after defeating Orin the Red at the Temple of Bhaal, where it was Elora who actually knocked the changeling into the abyss below the temple. They both apologized for their cruelty towards each other, recognizing that they were the only family members they had left. Their friendship is stronger now due to all that they’ve gone through!

He is currently in a loving and devoted relationship with Shadowheart and they are so cute together that I want to cry about it. Watching them grow so much as individuals and as a couple has been adorable, and I know that post-game they spend the rest of their half-elven lives together. 🩷

[madfantasy]

Dears;

Sleepless

I didn't know that I could be more sleep deprived, more in the sense that the nightmares of death and murder wakes me up in fever and chest burn now.

I thought I was okay and I was just witnessing and grieving over everything happening in this world, I can't much speak on it but with my siblings, my guardians ofc know and part of our family even affected by the "wars" that raged in and around 🍉, I still feel just as suffocated, useless, helpless and isolated as I feel everyday if not more. The internet remains my only window to the world..

The only thing I could able to talk to my guardians about is that telling them I feel immense guilt, my other half, my other home is being wiped out, land stripped of human warmth, from recent and ancient memories, all the structures old and new, the nature that hugged it tightly and the music that floated from it's midst. And here I am carrying nothing but a blood connection and writing in immaculate Arabic, one thing I was consistently praised on and ment alot to me in terms of belonging, but literally can't understand the casual/slang part of it no matter how I think I get it. Which I understand finally is what called: a late diagnosis of autism, possible related to those specific speaking patterns.

I'm 80% nonverbal, and when I find my voice, specifically when it comes to expressing myself, everything I say sounds like riddles or poems instead of plain direct speech with clear indication and values. I take so long revising these little writings to make sure at least they are coherent. It's often frustrating as suddenly not being able to scream when u need..

In the same time, I can't deal with being perceived, I can not even interact with what I've shared on my TT or @madmanii because my brain just shuts down, it doesn't matter what's the situation, as long there's social interactions, my rational blanks and stops translating sense to me.. it might be so good I can't even say how much intensely I love it, same as bad.. Even through art, and I thought because it is in art form, something I feel more able expressing, I can't say more or do more or give more engagement than this. While engagement with my art shocks me each time as if It was the first time. It takes all my remaining soul to make this art, this last tether to my sanity and humanity, so I have unmeasured gratitude..

The only release to this raging sense of belonging and grief I had all my life is to make stories, OCs. Those two are just fantasy-ed version of the 2 homes I'm from. But never shared more drawings of them because I did not want to be identified and get any "anything-against-mainstream" phobia towards me as I've been punished for it severely lots in real life. They are even not a romantic pair, just bromancing and 'too' beautiful, and I still drew many other romantic ships and posts them, regardless..

But I worry too much and often my art, posts or whatever is never seen..

Whatever it's the algorithm or doing communication, I can't not do more of what is socially 'required' to be seen and heard, my art is all I can offer and as it always shows me it's never enough, I tried so hard that my art for the first time in my life became just another burden and chore instead of a sanctuary and brain food. Whatever I did, I don't have a presence online, I only have the few Snape fans who truly care about me and showed me humanity I've never known. But I still don't have numbers or popularity, and at this point I'm so burn out from trying that I don't care I'm losing followers or have no likes, it's silence on both ends now...

I wish I could achieve more and be more helpful and not worry about fearing anything, my existence here online is done by secret to begin with and not consistent cuz I have trash net, and I don't know how to do more.. even for myself..

It's my birthday month, and that's ticks down one year of six..

About perception I relate to Hard: https://vt.tiktok.com/ZSNQeJy8u/

Thank u for reading, Sweet dreams, precious 🖤❤️

[iloveyanderes]

Shikama doji/sika madu yandere analysis, this is mainly for me and my friend that will probably never read this despite the fact that they'll probably never read it, warning bad words and sexual themes.

This same friend made me read the manga and I have to say no character has such a big of an impact on me as shikama doji gives me, this man is number two on my list of favorite characters, sitting right next to my beloved shiraori(btw I headcanon the both of them as siblings) and I've noticed a very short amount of fics on him, I've really only found one so if someone could send me some more I haven't found it be very appreciated.

Anyway moving on the analysis we go into the first part, his character.

To this day he remains very mysterious, he's an angel like character who's intentions still remain partly hidden, my greatest guess is that he wants to revive his son Mika but Mika is kind of alive? Maybe there's like two Mika's and he attempted to create a perfect replica of his son but failed so many times until we got our current Mika? Maybe our Mika is a reincarnation of his son and shikama knows this but that wouldn't make sense since he kinda was really unnice towards Mika when he was turning into a demon and destroyed his dreams, one thing is clear is that he has an attachment towards his son because he quite litterly kept him in a clear coffin for an unknown amount of time, I'd guess about a thousand years.

He also is very manipulative while making himself seem almost saintlike, he uses people and then abandons him, he seems to care about people by calling them endearments before threatening to kill them and attempting to follow through with it.

I imagine him as a controlling yandere, while also being a training yandere(one that trains you to act a certain way), he's not one to lose his temper but on the rare occasion he does I pray for you. He's also not big on physical punishments, most of the time he'd opt for mental ones, even so he does really not like punishments going more for positive reinforcement. Kidnapping you is a pretty much guaranteed but locking you up really depends on the situation, a bit protective but really possessive.

I have so many ideas for this guy and I'm so excited to share them with you.

If we were talking Platonic yandere I have a couple ideas.

1.you being the angel Mika's twin brother, after his son died he'd probably lock you up, on a tower like Rapunzel, funny enough I could imagine him singing mother knows best,.in this idea I don't think he'd ever let you talk to anyone other then him, he would leave you alone for days sometimes even months, only to appear at the most random times, brushing your hair so delicately as if he didn't just leave you totally isolated for the longest time. He's overprotective anyone that even dares go near you will meet death, you wouldn't believe how many of his fledgling vampire accidentally walked into your quarters and perished.

2. Your one of the orphans he took in and turned into vampires, in this idea he would give you a lot more freedom, not consistently worried that your going to die if someone bad even looks at you, though he would keep you with him all hours of the day, those other Orphans and salves he brought? They wouldn't even have the chance to express there jealousy towards you simply because you have never once left his side, he'd also occasionally wrap you in his wings and hold your tiny body next to him, I don't think he'd let you age, preferring to keep you as a tiny child that he could forever manipulate.

3. This is my final idea for platonic yandere and definitely the funniest in my opinion, imagine if you were his younger sibling and he absolutely adored you from birth, taking over the job of whatever parents the two of you came from, being there when you said your first word, when you took your first steps, EVERYTHING. The funny part of this comes from you, you've always known that your brother Is a psychopath, you know about the people he's tortured despite how hard he's tried to hide it, you want nothing more to get the absolute fuck away from him, he's absolutely fucking delusional, everytime you try to hide from him he somehow convinces himself that your playing hide and seek, every time you run he's right behind you asking where your going in such a hurry, he follows you everywhere and your trying to get the Frick away from him. Imagine you somehow manage to seal him away for a couple hundred years and you meet our Mika and yuu and get super confused about it, wtf is his son here and the weird creation that he made. Imagine just dreaming peacefully, feeling happy you don't have to deal with your brother anymore and waking up terrified when your brother whose now possessing shinoa is hugging you, screaming on the top of your lungs and bolting down the hallway of whatever house you decided to sleep in. Basically this entire idea is you running while screaming and him following you.

Moving on the the romantic yandere:

1. Imagine being a cute little bird he found one day, one of that he ended up liking a little too much, so much that he turned you human and kept you in a cage, a cute golden one only for the most beautiful of birds, almost no one knows about you and it's going to stay that way, he's very territorial over you, being an angel himself he thinks of birds as lesser beings, so technically he owns you.

2. Instead of shinoa getting him as cursed gear, he gets you instead, though unlike shinoa he ends up liking you a little too much, haunting your dreams every night, clinging so close, and forcibly possessing your body just so he could be a little bit closer to you, he's with you all hours of the day.

3. Your one of his servant, you were a slave he bought and you listen to every single one of his orders, when he wants you to kill someone you do it, when he wants you to watch as he tortures an innocent person you had the audacity to help you do it, when he demands that you place your head in his lap you do it. With him you don't have anymore free will, just him only him.

This is all I've got for now, pls let me know what you thought of this and feel free to give me your ideas! Have a great day.

[dearestwoods]

12.

...Time passes, circumstances change. You lose a memory, you gain another; you lose a parent... you gain a sibling. Or two, if you're really lucky.

But it can't last, right? It never does.

Cooper would say I'm being superstitious, Sahrami that I'm too infatuated with order for my own good. But fairytales have morals, and someone like me isn't supposed to get a happy ending. I would be fine with that, if it weren't for the possibility that it might also affect the people around me. My loved ones, who deserve so much better. And because of this... I've been afraid. Deeply, deeply afraid of the future.

But fear is usually a sign of ignorance, and if there's anything I'm good at, it's finding answers. And so, I've been reading up more on entropy, hoping it might, well... decrease some of the entropy inside of me, perhaps.

Entropy is the measure of disorder, but not disorder as in "messiness". No; a messy cottage has less entropy than a tidy manor. It's about the number of possibilities. Flip a coin, you get one of two answers. Flip two coins, you can get four answers. Three coins, that's eight possible answers. Four is sixteen, five is thirty-two, ten is one thousand and twenty-four… More coins, more entropy.

The more entropy you have, the more difficult it becomes to reverse it into "negentropy", or what we usually call "order". If you shuffle a sorted deck of cards, you're extremely unlikely to ever achieve the same original order again just by continuing to shuffle. You need some sort of extraordinary intervention, some way that you can reliably find the one specific possibility you want, and then manipulate the odds until you get it. That's not something any ordinary human can do.

Sahrami can. He reads the chaos, and he finds the state he wants, and he shuffles the deck until he gets it. (At least... This is how I understand it.)

But you can't get something from nothing. Overall entropy will always increase in the universe; for entropy to decrease in a subpart of a system, it needs to increase somewhere else. Take a piñata, for example—before I strike it, I won't know what's inside (high entropy for me). After I strike, I will know what the inside of the piñata looks like (low entropy for me), but now candy is scattered everywhere on the ground (high entropy for my surroundings). If I pick up the candy and place it in a bowl, the ground's entropy will have decreased, but now I will have increased entropy in the bowl. Beyond this, the effort of striking the piñata and picking up the candy will have expended some of my energy, releasing heat into my surroundings, which also increases entropy (because it allows molecules to move faster, thus increasing the number of possible positions on a micro level).

Similarly... if Sahrami expends energy to decrease my entropy, his entropy will increase instead. What better example, really, than how exhausted and anxious he has been ever since he met me? And while I may be able to slightly and slowly decrease some of his entropy in return by showing my affection... It can never compare to the increase I cause. One step forward, five steps back.

So, what about the moral of my story, then...? Well, total entropy can never decrease, only increase or stay the same. I've been increasing entropy all around me ever since I was born—most often, as a result of my own efforts to decrease the entropy inside of me. To sort my shuffled deck of cards into neat little categories, give them names, pretend that I'm in control. Pretend that I'm not a piñata filled with razor blades.

I've been trying to do something different, now. In some ways, I've been increasing my inner entropy, by shuffling the cards again and playing the hand I get. I'm no longer the controlled caricature of "Inspector Whatever-his-name" or any of the other attempts at negentropy I've made over the years. I'm Silvano Kara Boscoverde, a piñata that sometimes gives candy, sometimes razor blades, sometimes a dumb pun. And you won't know which of the multitude of possibilities you'll get until you poke me. In fact, you won't even know how many possibilities there are. And neither will I.

But in order to make this work, and not make it lead to complete and utter chaotic failure and tragedy, Sahrami has to give up himself for me. He has to be able to pick up on the slight variations in chaos that imply razor blades rather than candy. He has to reshuffle the deck into an order that won't harm me or anyone else. He has to suffer constant increases in entropy, only because I can't regulate my own in a healthy way.

And he's not the only one. My existence in the lives of good people such as Soregina, Fratellastrogi, Mystère, or Starling... It only increases their entropy. Sometimes it may seem as though it temporarily decreases, but... I can't help but wonder whether there's really any way to stop this build-up of entropy around me, inside me, without sacrificing too much in exchange. Whether there's any way to avoid the moral of the story.

After all, Entropy himself has shown a willingness to interfere to assure my continued existence. If that isn't a sign that I'm the ultimate source of entropy in this universe, then I don't know what would be. A part of me hopes that he wouldn't have told his son to keep me alive if he knew it would only bring him suffering. A part of me hopes that I'm missing the point of it all, and that maybe there's another moral to the story. But as France is approaching, entropy keeps increasing around me, and I am finding it increasingly difficult to hope for another outcome than tragedy.

I would stay at home, if I thought it would increase the chances of a happy ending. I don't. And maybe, sometimes, an increase in entropy is better than nothing. At least it means there are still possibilities ahead.

So let's throw a handful of coins into the air and see how they land.

[prcdo]

have you heard from NICOLAS PRADO yet? back home they’re said to work as a REAL ESTATE COPYWRITER.  before this trip to blackwood pines, i’ve heard that they’re known to be ACTIVE, JOCULAR, AND ADAPTABLE. but on the downside, they’re known to be BRASH, COMPETITIVE AND BLUNT. when you think about them, you’ll probably see JERSEY NUMBERS WORN LIKE MILITARY MEDALS, BURST BOXING BAGS, CRUSHED SODA CANS, TARNISHED TROPHIES, AND KNUCKLES BRUISED TO THE HUE OF BUSINESS SUITS. and because of that, i would say that they’re known to be THE JOCK.

STATS. 

full name.  nicolas meza prado. 

nicknames.  nick is, in fact, his preferred name. nods at variations thereof with the notable exception of nicky.

date of birth.  13 october. 

place of birth.  odessa, texas, usa.  

current residence.  detroit, michigan, usa. 

languages.  fluent in english and spanish.

education.  has an mba from michigan state. paid for by a sports scholarship, of course.

occupation.  real estate copywriter. 

gender.  cisgender male. he/him. 

orientation.  bisexual. 

marital status.  dating, more often than not.

family.  a father, a mother, and two siblings sandwiching him into a suffocating space stuffed with birth order stereotypes.

PERSONALITY. 

the brief.  in one word, nick is winning. not a moment in his life has been spent without incredible drive, nor with any consideration as to local speed limits. he holds his head high and, in the process, can lose track of the bigger picture as easily as he can paint a new landscape of goals with loaded words and laborious action. whether this is concerning or endearing depends on a lot of factors, but he’s not dead yet, so he can’t be too insufferable. or maybe the team just needs some muscle. that’s probably it.

the good.  nick wants to help people. although he’s a primary proponent of self-love, he leads by example and is eager to learn whatever he can from whoever he can – the dumb jock stereotype didn’t pop up without any strict basis in reality, after all – and he’d sooner exile himself to an athlete’s foot locker than force someone to take a risk he wouldn’t seize first. 

the bad.  nick wants to help people with the absolute outlier of himself. he builds his plans around others, if he has any plans at all, yet has shoved his expectations for everyone above the stratosphere to the point where he feels personally degraded should anyone reject his get-pushed-in-the-pool-to-learn-how-to-swim teaching techniques. he does not deal well with having his opinions ignored in any capacity and nurses grudges as well as anyone with a doctorate in self-centredness would.

the ugly.  nick needs to be needed. being disliked macerates his mind into this mush of desperate people-pleasing, even if he knows the only path to justice is the one paved with potholes. if a friend asked him to jump off a cliff, he’d only ask if they wanted to film him doing a flip on the way down.

APPEARANCE. 

height.   5’9. good posture and a gleaming smile had most intramural coaches thinking otherwise.

build.  athletic, with a mean leanness that puts both his obsessive gym-going in adolescence and overwhelmingly green diet in adulthood on full blast. you know, as if he’s not enthusiastic enough about divulging all the sordid, sweaty

style.  comfort over couture. everything in his closet but his collection of immaculate basketball sneakers is best described as devil-may-care. colours stay neutral and t-shirt graphics stay slightly crude. sleeves must be rolled up regardless of weather and whether he’s even wearing something with long sleeves.

notable features.  jet black hair styled with water and confidence. the uncertain beginnings of a bristly moustache. a tattoo of the number one in a compact collegiate font on his right shoulder blade.

BIOGRAPHY.  content warnings for brief mentions of hazing and injury.

tl;dr.  annoyingly smirky middle child stomps his way into acquiring eldest child syndrome + a humiliating defeat to cap off his last collegiate basketball season, and proceeds to do everything in his power to not become the guy who peaked in school. which actually amounts to just throwing himself into work with little regard for sleep schedule or personal relationships, but a quick winter getaway could help him unwind a little, right? right.

first quarter.  nick’s a good kid, but good isn’t always good enough. his parents drill that lesson into his skull as soon as he’s out the hospital and in the prado household’s singular bedroom. they do it unintentionally, which is how they do a lot of things, but however much he wants to play hercules by hurling his weight around the run-down playground, every time he slices one head off the hydra of approval by joining this club or scoring that letter, another two pop up in its place, born of his brothers’ very existence. the one who came before him is their meal ticket making his way through med school, the one who came after him is already on track to become an accountant, and he’s… good at throwing things in hoops. things being homework, hoops being over trash bins. but he’s always been a good-natured kid, so when he secures a spot on the jv basketball team after trying out as a total joke, he soaks up the sugared electrolytes, the electric sound of applause, and the endless opportunities to sink his energy into something until the end of time. or until 6pm. you know, whenever practice ends.

second quarter.  nick’s a good guy. his parents call him the fun one, which might not be a compliment, but warping any and all descriptors into compliments is how nick’s become something of a casanova and kept his name relatively clear of any scandals. that is, until he semi-consciously continues a secret hazing ritual that results in the severe incapacitation of his fraternity brothers and a wicked hangover that, gasp, results in him ruining the next week’s championship game. then he blows his birthday money on veneers of all kinds to coast through police interviews and changes his course from sports officiating to business administration. then he realises that being impressive is way more important to the status of being good than making a squeaky-clean good impression.

third quarter.  nick’s living the good life. sure, he’s got little to no time for recreation, but he’s strongarmed his way up the corporate ladder and isn’t coming down at any cost. also, he can still toss his assignments in the trash can. he’s got a photocopier now. his friends tell him there’s no place better than blackwood pines, and if only to prove them wrong (and maybe prevent himself from getting hypertension at thirty) nick brings himself and a basketball along for the ride to the rockies.

fourth quarter.  nick’s story may or may not have a good ending. aka this is the part where i’ll put summaries of all super important life-changing in-character events so i don’t lose track of them <3

MISCELLANEOUS. 

radio.  beastie boys. no doubt. oasis. rage against the machine. red hot chili peppers.

potential relationships.

childhood friends.  people who witnessed his evolution from tryhard to hard-ass and has, by some miracle, decided to stick around. nick’s definitely drafted up at least one microsoft word nda regarding his tragic past and its secrecy for these folks. whether or not they unblocked him long enough to read the final document is trivial.

college classmates.  nick may or may not be the reason the general public does not desire a 5’9 brown-eyed man in finance. while not as egoistic as he was in his younger years, his enthusiasm for extra credit was well recorded.

former teammates.  while he never went pro, nick’s played basketball for as long as he’s been alive and was a volunteer coach at a couple of summer camps in his must-join-every-extracurricular-ever-or-perish days. whether you knew him as the point guard of your dreams or the gatorade purist of your nightmares, nick was sure to make games interesting.

gym sibs.  they stay hungry, they devour, put in the work, put in the hours, et cetera.

former coworkers/clients/employers.  nick’s had a host of less-than-dignified jobs with less-than-humane pay, including but not limited to arcade janitor, junior assistant dishwasher at a fast food joint, and human directional.

current coworkers/clients/employers.  being a real estate agent isn’t much more dignified when you get to the cold calling, door-slamming phase, but at least nick gets to do it in a fancy suit! and maybe you want to do things in a fancy suit too. or own a beautiful home in the suburbs with so much fluorescent lighting you’ll never think of going to the hospital again.

flings.  nick commits to everything except for relationships. go figure. he’s never lied about what he wants out of a night or two, but he has driven off way more than two dates by insulting their interior decorating skills during pillow talk.

assorted headcanons.  has a southern twang to his voice that gets exponentially stronger on the rare occasion he experiences an emotion aside from pride. says that he bikes everywhere for health reasons but has actually been banned from several buses for playing his super hype playlists without headphones. also hates cars because the smell and sight of exhaust pipe smoke reminds him of his older brother lolol. doesn’t curse much in general but absolutely refuses to do so in the presence of a lady thanks to mami, even if she has a sailor’s mouth of her own. very physically, if not emotionally, protective; will not hesitate to be someone’s meat shield in any given situation.

[somedeadbeatloz3r69]

There was a dog named Rasmi, it had two puppies. It loves the mother of the puppies so much, Eslam. They're a happy doggy family. They play fetch, groom each other and chase each other around and play. They have over eleven other dogs in their pack that they love oh so much. They were happy, day from day living contentfully. Then one day disaster strikes, the pound hunts them down. They do whatever they can to capture them. They kill random street dogs, kick them and abuse them. Shove them in blenders and cover them in glue. They're relentless, and they abuse them badly. One by one, eleven members of the pack die. Imagine how bad the father dog and mother dog must've felt, hearing that dogs of their pack died. Ones they loved, ones they had stories with, ones that they played with. Kicked, hurt, gone. The members of the pack were gone, and the poor pups could barely process it. They're starved, their mouths dry from so little water. They fell ill, really sick. Their fur was matted and dirty and their paws were so bruised and their skin under the fur affected by a disease. 'It'll be okay' the father pup said. but would it? would it really be okay if no other animals bit back? if the birds didn't fight, the cheetahs didn't bite, the cat's didn't hiss, and the mice didn't help find food? would it really be okay for these dogs? One day the pack will die. Rasmi. Rasmi and his two pups he loves dearly. Eslam, the mother. They all might die if the other animals don't help. Now what if I told you these were humans? Humans, with dying kids. Humans with their families, grandparents, cousins and siblings dying before their very own eyes. years and years of memories lost to a unruly bombing. These humans, barely surviving, breathing, HUMANS. TODDLERS. BABIES. are losing family, starved, sick and ill. No more laughing and smiling. just surviving and crying. One day this family might die, their story will end and everything they've done is gone to shreds. No pets. No food. Death. Gone, and lost after fighting. Fighting for what? for death? This can be prevented, they can be saved. But you need to take action. They can't save themselves. A bird cannot fly with no wings. A bird with no wings can only fly if someone makes them new wings. Or if the other birds in the sky help them fly.

"Hello, I'm Rasmi from Gaza supporting my wife, Eslam, and she a mother of a 2 daughters. We have been subjected to bombing, siege and starvation. Unfortunately,

I HAVE LOST A 11 NUMBER OF MY FAMILY MEMBERS❗ and I cannot bear to lose more.

Can you write a post talking about my story and share my story with your friends? I hope that you will donate a little, 40$ or 50$ from each person.

It will make a difference with me so that we can start a new life outside of the stricken Gaza.💔

My daughters are suffering from many diseases such as skin diseases , malnutrition and hepatitis." - @rasmi-gaza