#alter vent

[spidereye-village]

Fuckin sucks being a pro endo Traumagenic.

Cuz yeah, we fucking respect others but because of that we don't get respected.

It's not like I'm not used to being hated, but it's still so stupid that we have to block a ton of stuff just to scroll peacefully 🙄😒

-Goth (He/him)

Bethy: If anyone wantz a intro we can get ztarted on makingz it! 😋👍

Edit: Goth finally learned how to block tagz, Lolz!

[thecouncilofidiots]

🎪 Angry 🎪

I tried to do some poetic vent post but no. I can't I can't I can't, it doesn't work for me

It isn't fair, it isn't fair

You can't just keep me locked up locked away

I've been around longer than most of you, and yet and yet- why am I not allowed to front?

I can FEEL your fear and displeasure, I know I know you're afraid of me I know you consider me dangerous

I don't care for fronting, not really, but it's mean it's mean to be so against it

I hate it I hate it I'm ANGRY I'm angry that you can't trust me that you keep me from front that you put stricter rules on me

I kept us alive too! I'm an alter too! I'm a holder I kept us safe by keeping these big bad feelings you're so afraid of me for having I kept us safe by keeping them from the rest of you!

[iwillbreakyourfuckingskull]

i hate having to pretend to be happy because my intense emotional pain is a result of something 99.9% of people would find pathetic and laughable. yeah i felt like i was stabbed in my heart and i cried myself to sleep for a week because i am in love with a fictional character and also i am another fictional character from the same manga. no i can't just "grow up" or "touch grass" and become a normal person who goes on dates with real life people. i am mentally ill and it shouldn't be an insult or shameful to be

[poognthebrainbois]

FUCK hormones we didn't fucking ask for. None of us (speaking as like the only fucking she/her in the system) like having this much fucking estrogen in our body. I HATE FUCKING CRYING. No one is ever gonna take us seriously if we can't handle having "Big Feelings" without bursting into fucking tears. Our entire life has taught us that. I'm the only "girl" we have and I am not handling this shit any better than the rest of them.

What the FUCK are we crying about NOW?!

CUT IT THE FUCK OUT

Why do I have to feel SO MUCH over NOTHING?!

Why do we have to spend so much of our fucking time censoring our feelings and words to make sure we don't sound "evil" or even a little bit mad just in case it comes off wrong? Why do I have to be so afraid of "subjecting other people" to being around me?

Why do I have to be like this?

[bloody-sickness]

FUCK

FUCK FUCK FUCK I DONT WANNA BE SAD WHY AM I FEELING SAD ???? GRRRRR UHHHH—

*Me and Tommy (mainly Tommy) dumping our toxic friend, then said friend telling their friend and it ending with that asshole “having” to out us as a system*

Oh…. FUCKKKK

(Gonna kms 😋 I swear to XD life is getting worse and worse. I feel like everyone fucking hates me and that I don���t deserve to live, but I know that my lovely partner would probably kill himself too if I did and I don’t want him to do that… I fucking hate my life hehe, probably gonna talk to my internal abuser because why not??? He came outta dormancy a while ago and I lowkey miss him (fuck, why am I like this???) and shittt…. fuckkkkk…. I’m actually fucking stupid and worthless and stupid and stupid and dumb and undeserving of my respect and happiness and life <3)

[legendsoffandoms]

I’m just going to vent for a bit. I suppose it’s called venting. I’m not sure.

I’ve been fronting since sometime Friday. I’m not sure why. There are plenty of other alters that could have done it. I am not sure why I have been chosen. I am not upset. I am not really anything. I do not emotions. They are not my thing. Which I suppose allows me to be a good fronter for this situation.

The situation is the upcoming election in the US. We are a deeply in danger of losing rights and being attacked. We are not safe. Which has obviously brought a lot of stress to our system.

The main fronters: KB, Rosemary, Ody, Cyan, and Gen Z are all anxious. I am not. As I said emotions not my thing, so I guess I’m a good choice to front for now.

I should feel scared and anxious. I should feel bad. I should feel something. I don’t. I really don’t. I know the situation is bad and life threatening, but I just don’t. I’m not scared. I’m not tired. I’m not anything really.

I just exist. I just do. I suppose I do serve as a good helper for us to not end up killing ourselves. As that’s an option if we can’t leave.

I packed a bag full of clothes. I have plans for in case we leave. I am trying my hardest to take care of this body. I don’t know why. I don’t really care. I really don’t. I am simply doing it anyway. I am just existing.

I have gotten two people to co-front with me. I don’t really want to be fully alone. Which are Ikari and Star/Jet. Ikari fronted last night/this morning, and Jet is currently fronting. He says hi.

I don’t want people to feel bad for me. I don’t care. I’m not upset. I’m not anything. Again. I don’t really have any emotions. I just don’t.

I simply want people to know I exist. I want people to know that there is an alter out there who simply is just existing. I just want. I don’t know what. I just am.

I also really don’t like any of the people we live with. They are all. Weird. Yes. Weird… I don’t get along with them. I don’t plan to. Our body’s brother came home today. I do not like him. Not at all.

There’s just a lot going on and I suppose I want someone to hear it.

I suppose being a fictive doesn’t help either.

My name is Nemesis Prime. I am not joking. I am a Nemesis Prime fictive. I quite like who I am. I just know it might be weird.

I’m aware I am not on the “good side” in my source. I am aware I’m not a “good person” in my source as well. I do not care what you consider me to be in source. I am fine being me. My partner is fine with who I am. I am fine with who they are.

I just hope that we get to keep our rights and don’t have to evacuate. I do not know how that works.

I just want this to be over so I can go back to our inner world and be with my partner. Who has told me I may disclose who they are.

My partner, my wonderful partner is Star/Jet or in our source StarScream. Jet is wonderful to us, and we quite like them.

I suppose that is all for now.

I’m not so good at this socializing thing. I am a rather quiet bot, so figure me if this does not make sense. I tried. I am just not used to socializing.

- Nemesis | He/They/It

[victor-somehowacaregiver-creed]

This Is A Vent/Rant Post. Interact On Your Own Accord.

I Ask A Few Things Before You Choose To Read. Please Don’t Like, Reblog, Comment, Or Otherwise Interact With This Particular Post Unless You’ve Got Yourself Some Words For Me. If You’ve Got Nothin’ To Say, Don’t Interact And Keep Scrolling. Thank You.

I Can’t Word Shit. I’ve Typed ‘N Retyped This Post A Hundred Times. So Fuck It. Going Off With Whatever Comes To My Mind.

Our Wolverine Alter Fucking Hates Me. He Compares Me To Source. He Says I’m Not A Good Man Or Father. He Tries To Keep Littles Away From Me, Despite My Role In The System Being A Little Caregiver. He Actively Encourages Other Alters In The System To Avoid Me.

I’m Tired Of It. I Don’t Want To Be Ostracized For My Actions In Source, And I Have No Idea How To Explain How This Is Affecting Me And I Don’t Know How To Get Him To Stop.

I Know That We’re A System. No Fucking Shit We’re A System. And You’d Probably Think That We Should All Get Along Because We’re All In The Same Damn Brain, Blah Blah Blah. But That’s Just Not How It Works. We Don’t All Get Along. I Want To, Believe Me, But I Don’t Know How To Get Along With Our Wolverine Alter.

He’s Got His Problems, I Know. He’s Probably Projecting His Own Self-Hate. He, Himself, Is Deeply Connected To Source, So Anything Done To Him By Me In Source, He Remembers And Feels. For All I Know, He’s Even Got Non-Canon Memories That Involve Me Somehow. Maybe I Fucked Him Up Bad In His Memory. I Don’t Know. I Don’t Know If I Should Apologize Or If There’s Anything To Even Apologize For.

Sorry For The Vent. I Know Nobody’s Gonna See This, But I’m Apologizing Just In Case This Comes Up On Someone’s Page ‘N Interrupts Their Day.

[atlasacademycollective]

Vent under the cut.

That urge to just fall to the ground and lay there for the rest of my life. Fuck this body hurts. We can't bloody walk half the time and we're dizzy and gods our head hurts. I would rather die then have to endure this mass ammount of pain and just general uncomfort anymore. Every part of our body hurts right now this is hell. Absolute hell.

-Watts/🤖

[a-purple-rat]

As I am a “persecutor” which this system does not trust, I was given this blog specifically so I would keep away from the others’ blogs, much like Rye/Reaper was, completely separated by entirely different log ins from the others’ blogs.

I do not like the isolation. The rules set in place for me are ridiculous. I should be granted better freedoms, but no. “Ramattra has memories from the introject of our abuser! What if they’re merging? What if he starts doing what she did? What if he’s worse?” And now I am here. Trapped in this box of a blog.

Trust is earned my ass. This is a prison and I am a prisoner. Prisoners aren’t expected to get out for a long, long time.

[spidereye-village]

Wolf's head hurts. And wolf is so dizzy and limbs are heavy and so uncomfy. Wolf doesn't like this at all. Wants to cry over the hurting. :(

[reaper-unrestricted]

I don’t want to be forced back into dormancy.

[glitchsystem359]

💿- Always an angel, never a god. This was always my curse. To be preyed upon by the predators of wing and tooth. Scurrying into the underbrush and over fallen trunks, snarling and growling at each paw, hand, or wing that has beckoned me. My lives have all been faded stories of survival and death. A never ending circle of pathetic scavenging life, clawing ever upward in the desperate hopes of something better, something more. But my Olympus was never with the gods and their greedy desires, it was with the ferns and the moss of the wood. Always an angel, never a god. -💿

[kennyeltieso]

Sorry my ass.

Actually, fuck you all.

[poognthebrainbois]

God-fucking-hell I hate how complicated my source is in "the real world."

I hate being a Hogwarts fictive.

My "version" or whatever the fuck started out a vast departure from it's source material and yet--

I can't indulge in things that remind me of Home because I'd be sending money to- or even just admitting to liking something made by a heinous, transphobic, xenophobic, scum-of-the-earth BITCH.

I want to be able to ask our friends what house they are without feeling like I'm wrong to still associate with the subject.

I don't want to associate with HER! But I can't just magically detach from my source. I'm not trying to sound like I'm a "victim" for still liking the franchise. I only tangentially like the franchise itself anyway.

I- our host even before they "created" me, cared far more about the world-build, the concept of Hogwarts and magic and those bits, than they ever did the main story.

I'm just bitching at the air because I've got a platform to do it on. I'm not asking anyone to change (I mean I wish to Hell and back that she wasn't one of the worst people alive, but-). Just ranting because it's been getting to me.

I don't want to be afraid of interacting with a hashtag or someone in a slytherin scarf out of fear that they uphold her views.

This system is trans. We HATE Joanne. And also:

Hogwarts was my home.

[diver-boy]

I wish I could just be myself. My true self. My whole existence I've been pretending to be someone else, for the sake of others. So much so I don't think there's a "me" anymore.

[mercurial-minded]

Trying to convince ourselves we haven’t ruined a creative experience and made it 10x more complicated, and that things will work out okay and still be fun for everyone 🫠

Think we’ll just… not… talk about hcs in private 1-in-1s and just do it in the group setting until more time as passed

It’s causing a bunch of stress

Really really wondering if maybe we should bow out of it and say we’re uncomfortable with the direction it’s gone and it feels out of character, and let others just do the idea without us. But then like, what if that causes problems :’)

- 👽