#tw vent

[dcveluve]

for me it's js my tummy which is js there but then hippies wtf 💔💔

my body is so weird…. my collarbones and hipbones are so visible, sometimes my ribs when i stretch out. but i also have fat thighs legs and arms and a lower tummy pouch 😭😭😭😭😭😭 like girl what is this

[borderline-culture-is]

bpd culture is

i hope leaving me was fucking worth it. you and i both know i'm the best friend you've ever fucking had. i don't want to see you crawling back to me when no one wants to deal with your "hey so you've been doing something that upsets me for years but i just didn't bother to tell you so i hate you now... sorry! ^_^" ass bullshit. i hope it fucking hurts when people call you out for the asshole you are. i hope you end up as alone as you made me. you would deserve every second of it, you unfeeling piece of shit. fuck you.

...but also please come back, i need you like i need oxygen. i'm so goddamn miserable (because of you) i can't fucking take it anymore. please, take pity on me again just one last time. i'd let you use me for all i'm worth. i'd do anything you asked, no matter how arduous, if you just stayed with me. please. just stay. give me a chance to fix this. that's all i ask. i'll be a good dog this time. i promise.

.

[mel-loly]

-Am I the only one who cried with the ““last”” (I know it's not the last) chapter of Dan Da Dan..?

[dushpshpsh]

the dodder

[jaxrants]

I'm crying... again

Adrian hardly talks to me anymore. I'm always the one texting first, and it hurts. I feel like he's not really putting forth any effort. I know he's going through something, but he won't tell me what. That hurts too. I tell him almost everything, even if I feel terrible and like I'm annoying him after. I wanna help him, but everytime I ask whats wrong, or why he's distancing himself from me, he leaves me on read.

I'm scared. What if he's found someone else? What if he's falling out of love with me? What if we moved too fast, and now he's realizing just how much of a loser I am? I don't want him to leave me. I love him, a lot.

If he's falling out of love with me, what do I do? I don't wanna leave him, but I also don't wanna make him stay if he's unhappy. He's hardly able to visit me.

I thought him moving in with his mom would make our relationship better, but I feel like he's drifting away from me.

I feel like just shutting down. I feel like stopping being open and letting him know stuff. I feel like leaving him on read more often. I feel like making him feel how I feel.

He goes to school, so I understand not being able to talk most of the week days, but when I stay up, or wake up at 5 in the morning to wish him a good day, and tell him I love him, you'd think he'd have the decency to tell me he loves me too. You'd think if he loved talking to me so much, he'd try to keep the conversation going more instead of depending on me to keep it going. You'd think he'd try to talk to me more often, instead of leaving me on read everytime I try to talk to him about issues I have.

I just wanna sit on call until we fall asleep like we did a few times, but everytime I ask, he shuts me down, using some kind of excuse. "If we sit on call, I won't be able to go to sleep." You say that as if I don't see your ass active on TikTok. "I'm sleeping on the couch in miss Vicky's room." And? You were sleeping on the floor in your cousins room while he watched porn right next to you and still sat on call with me. Not to mention the times you woke him up while on call with me.

I don't know anymore. I'm scared he's falling out of love with me because of our lack of communication, but I don't know what to do to fix it.

Also, I'm sorry if you actually read all of this. You really don't need to hear me rant about a boy when it's more than likely going to end up just being my brain hating me.

@puppet200 @purpleeggyboi @zeroisreallygood @im-a-simp898 @luciluck2046 @evry1h8s-me @aflairforthemelodramaticc @caretaleandotherstuff @beecha @blooming-skeleton

[crush-echoes]

sometimes i just get hit with the feeling

i wasnt supposed to make it this far

also what do i do now

[ryomaandgundhamkin]

Okay. I have a lot to explain. First:

Listen- I am REALLY sorry for not drawing a lot. For the last month (by this point it’s probably been a month), I’ve been really, really behind on drawing and TSAMS lore. I don’t really feel that I’m apart of the fandom anymore. I just lost all my energy to actually dedicate myself to the lore of the show. I feel exhausted. Plus, school isn’t helping. For the last two weeks it’s been kind of hard for me, I mean aside from my trip, but then I had to catch up on work then do 1 project. I had two tests today.

Art block is hitting hard and I hope you understand. I just feel like I want to draw, I have a lot of ideas, I just can never get a result I actually like. It’s a process of drawing and deleting all my progress. I feel like it’s either 1., I make too much art, which in turn exhausts me further, or 2., I don’t make art at all. I’ve just been lurking around Tumblr and going around, like “oh I’m so going to draw this”, but I’m realizing that I definitely do not have enough energy to draw anything TSBS right now.

My main focus at the moment is school and school only. I hope you understand this because I had a shit ton of late work I had to do from the days I missed while I was away (7 fucking pages), and I had to zoom through that, THEN I had the science test. I had my math test today and I did well and now I’m tired af. I just don’t feel like drawing in general, period. Coloring maybe, but I just have too many things to do OUTSIDE of drawing online on here. Basically this is just me taking a small break. I’m sorry that content may be slower on my account, but I feel like I need this or else I will eventually just actually pass out from the stress. No one did nothing wrong aside from me. I’m just torturing myself. My brain hurts and my sleep schedule is damaged. Planning events is NOT fun and every weekend, I seriously just want a break, but OH someone’s coming over or we’re doing something or we’re going somewhere. I seriously cannot take a break unless I have NOTHING TO DO, which is kind of impossible considering my mother’s plans.

I just don’t feel like drawing. I feel like I’m starting to sleep more early everyday. My mind is a mess. It hurts. It hurts.

I’m just so sorry about this. I hope you guys understand I may not be in the best mental state (even if I act like I’m not, and same at with school, @kiwikay3 …), and I don’t feel like drawing for a bit. Just expect me to give you updates once in a while and maybe that’s it. Just don’t expect a ton of content or doodles from me.

This problem has nothing to do with you guys, I just want you to know this and know what to expect from me from now on. I’ll catch up with all my art requests and things like that eventually, I just feel like school has taken a toll on me. On my health. But, just myself overall. I don’t want anyone to worry. I’ll probably be active less and less so it’s fine if you unfollow me or something because I feel like I’ve already failed you all, and I’ve already reached the peak of my art journey (mid-October or so). I’m so sorry but I feel like when I write these I just get so emotional and I can’t really describe any of it in words. I’m probably going to sleep after this before I actually start crying. I’m actually so annoyed and sad and I just feel so many emotions. My brother is not helping, because HE does not care about his physical health so me and my parents do instead.

Sorry. Thank you all.

I feel like I’m going to have a mental breakdown fuck i hate this

[a-hospital--for-souls]

"It's all in your head." - Thank you Janette, that's why it's called mental illness. It cannot be in my ass.

[fvckyujay]

“Binging because you ate two cookies

Is like

Stomping on your phone because you dropped it”

[thecorvidforest]

boy it would be nice to be able to google something related to personality disorders, psychosis, intellectual disabilities, autism, DID/OSDD, etcetera without finding majority articles that are like “how to deal with a person with X” “how to cope with your child with X” “how to spot someone faking X” “can people with X be cured?”

[chiyeko-kurea]

My last breath will be a sigh of relief.

[borderline-culture-is]

vent tw and violence mention

suspected bpd is fuck you for not reblogging my posts, fuck you for not talking to me for days unless im the one that reaches out first. fuck you, bitch. wait, they reblogged something? yay maybe i misjudged! but then reaslising its not my post.. just a reblog i did.. they dont reblog anything i make, my art, nothing. fuck you actually again. and fuck my other friend for gasllighting me and telling me "oh theyre just struggling and they find it difficult to initiate contact" THEN WHY THE FUCK DO THEY DO IT FOR OTHER PEOPLE AND NOT ME?? cunt cunt cunt cunt i m going to fucking kill you

🐦‍⬛🪽

.

[themindofmine]

I feel like I’m already dead but I have to keep on living

[puppyguur]

:33

[vixensofdeath]

the urge to die and become nothing becomes stronger every day

[jiraikeiangel]

it's funny how little things make me violently upset and angry