#vent tw

[t-errifier]

also, i'm really sorry for being this way. i really am a patient person, but. when it starts to feel like someone replies to everyone but me. that's when i kind of start to softblock. it turns into not a matter of a lack of patience, but rather just degrading on me as a person. so, if anyone is wondering why i soft blocked them out of the blue, or seemingly so . yeah

[pwppydracula]

i just wish i wasn’t unlovable, this shit hurts so much idk if i can handle this anymore

[infamouslydorky]

Honestly upsetting how many issues would be solved if billionaires were content with having their income capped at 999,999,999.99 and the rest of their profits went to taxes but instead we have a situation where they're almost trillionaires and people are dying in the streets because of poverty and negligence

[zxlofttt]

[thecommunalfoolboy]

It’s crazy how many people just don’t understand why a lot of aro and or ace people don’t like that Alaster gets shipped. It’s not that hard to understand we don’t have a lot to let ourselves lose. I mean can you name 10 asexual characters? 5? Can you name two aro characters. There’s the guy from Archie who they made have a sex scene in a movie version. There’s a few books. I think a background character in Heartstopper? Do you see the theme here??? You’re all queer people, do you not get it? How it feels to have nothing? Is it so wrong to be upset that there’s finally an outwardly aroace person in popular media and instead of people embracing that they’re fighting on the internet about why it’s ok to ignore it? And I will never in my fucking life have anything against the people who are aro and or ace and portray him in THEIR experiences, even if it is a romance or sex favorable experience, but it is obvious that way too many of you guys are allo and it just leaves a bad taste in my mouth. I don’t even like him as a character that much, he isn’t even made by an aroace artist. The show isn’t even that fucking good, I just want to keep someone like me for once in my life. If there were a million other aroace characters I wouldn’t care, but it just hurts seeing erasure coming from my own community. It just sucks, man, I don’t know. It just sucks

[island-76]

It's so aggrivating seeing your health get worse while you're helpless to stop it

It's so aggrivating to have to adapt to brain fog when there was no fog a month ago

It's so aggrivating to deal with so much fatigue, when 2 years ago, you were so lively

It's so aggrivating to deal with all of this and find yourself slipping into anger more and more

To find yourself holding your tongue so you don't hurt those around you because you're tired and don't have the energy for it anymore

It's so unimaginably aggrivating

[citruscitrushope]

Also terfs trying to use pcos to push their ideas can fuck right off. Women with pcos's and transfems' experiences aren't exactly the same, but they're almost like a venn diagram. "It's truly something only biological women can understand" the woes over body hair? Body type? Voice? The constant feeling that you're not a "real girl"? The dysphoria? The disrespect from medical professionals? The feeling of otherness compared to other women?

You all claim "you can always tell", but go after women with pcos who don't shave. You scrutinize hormone treatments when they're key to helping us not have extremely painful periods or hate our bodies. You push rigid definitions of what it means to be a woman when being intersex throws all of them out of the window.

You're not for women, you're just against those who don't fit into your rigid gender binary and expectations.

[errrr-vent-blog]

god gives his siilliest schizospecs the woorst days of theiir lives every siingle dayy non stop.

[candyheartedchy]

My comfort characters are now starting to feel discomforting to me.

I might have to hide merch of my f/os from my sight because I keep getting distressed whenever I see them. I can’t watch anything they are in as a distraction. I can’t even look at my drawings or screenshots of them either without feeling shame. I had to hide merch and avoid stuff of the one character in the past when I dropped him as an f/o before bringing him back. But now I feel like I have to do it for the other two mains now. Hell I probably have to for all of my f/os at this point. I keep getting reminded of shit that hurt me related to them and every time I see these characters I’m feel physically sick. I constantly feel like an embarrassment or joke when I interact with a fandom or the self ship community in general.

I’m fucking scared of everything now.

[system-of-a-feather]

Honestly a skill that many develop that can be easily missed for those that grew up in abusive or neglectful home is the skill of "receiving / being taken care of" and I really dont see people providing advice or "explain it to me like Im a toddler because I am emotionally at or BELOW that level of understanding it"

And I know in a lot of trauma spaces, people struggle with learned helplessness and/or not knowing how to care for themselves; but I think its important to acknowledge how fucking HARD and confusing and difficult it is to learn - as an adult - how to receive care, attention, or help.

I find, from observation of others, its something that comes a lot more naturally and almost like breathing when someone offers or begins to help out and logically, I know it is easy to break down the steps to 1) someone gives help 2) you accept it (here we are ignoring the entirely other difficult skill of asking for help which is a whole seperate but related thing)

But its like... really not that simple, because even if you physically "accept" the help and they help you, thats only like the surface level application of the skill / concept and ugh

I dont really have the words for it atm and am mostly venting but man, 8 years of therapy and its still such a hard concept and skill for me to learn, apply and integrate into my life. I think - of all the skills I missed due to my trauma and upbringing - its the skill I struggle with the most

(open for anyone to add their two cents on)

[t-errifier]

is soft - blocking when you unfollow people really that hard? hard block me if you're that lazy. just don't make me embarrass myself continuing to support your content when you dislike me enough to unfollow me lol.

[pwppydracula]

damn it!! i hate being jealous!!!! i hate being so paranoid and anxious and overthinking everything!!!!!!!!!!

[infamouslydorky]

Really feeling the quiet before the storm right now

[damagedcoda6669]

TW: CHILD ABUSE/NEGLECT

[zxlofttt]

uncensored ver on twt