#cdd introject

[chemicalcarousel]

Yeah, I'm a fictional introject alter 😎 I'm kinda like if your favourite character was real, but instead of being all cool and hot I'm pathetic and not like that character at all actually sorry to disappoint 😔

[iwillbreakyourfuckingskull]

Broke ❌🤓🤦: Dressing up the body to resemble your internal sense of self

Woke ✅😎👍: Going absolutely insane and treating the body like you're customising a cool character in a video game

[just-another-alter-blog]

Age is very weird when you got a complex dissociative disorder

I am physically 28, but internally, I see myself as a man in my late 30s, but also I formed as an alter when we were 18 or so and then I went dormant for most of our 20s, so even though I identify as older than the rest, I almost feel like I'm the youngest. I feel awkward and insecure like I was when I stumbled through the last part of high school as a misdiagnosed neurodivergent person who was bullied and mocked for "being weird". I feel like a teenage girl even if I internally see myself as a man nearing 40. I was formed by the brain of a high schooler and since I went dormant for almost a decade, I kinda didn't mature in many ways. It's especially weird being an introject and feeling this special type of shame around not being as capable as your source. I am not some strong man, who can handle intense stress. I'm essentially a traumatised child playing pretend. I'm holding on to so much shame and guilt for being such a poor excuse of an adult person. I feel so anxious and wrong for just existing - just like I, or we, did back when I split off

I'm still trying to get used to our current life as a 28 year old living alone away from our abusers, and hopefully I will feel more mature as I process my trauma and forgive my past self. But as of now, I am basically a 38 year old man in a 28 year old body with the mind of an 18 year old neurodivergent girl from 2014

[reimeichan]

Think systems with a high number of fictional introjects are a new phenomena? Kluft's paper on polyfragmented/extremely complex DID from 1988 includes a patient with LOTR introjects, and another based off of Shakespear's Tempest. Fictional introjects have been a thing for a very long time!

[leviafin]

Exotrauma

Having exotrauma from a "cringe" or "silly" source sucks. It feels like you're taken infinitely less seriously than those who have trauma from grittier, adult-geared and/or "acceptable" sources. Which in and of itself just isolates you and makes it worse.

I'm not just a silly little thing from your silly little Roblox game that could never show signs of trauma because it's 'just a kids game'--and I'm not your blorbo either. It feels like there's 2 common options for how people treat fictionkind with exotrauma:

Oh my poor little scrunkly, my little cardboard box meow meow.... Going to hold you because I love babying you and treating you like you're not even a person because I see you only as my favourite character. (Mind you, this is distinctly SEPARATE from actual friendly support, you can tell the difference.)

You're not a fictional character, get over it lmao. Yeah I know you are them but like you didn't ACTUALLY live through that, stop claiming it, it's disrespectful. Why are you upset at my memes about your death lol. Get a life.

So like... Maybe fictionkind are people. Maybe I don't want to think about the worse parts of my source. Maybe I don't want my trauma shoved in my face as a little funny joke, even if the context is changed. Maybe, just maybe... Leave alterhumans with fictional sources alone. Even if their source is lighthearted, even if it's for kids, even if it's the most "cringe" media you can think of.

Sonic the Hedgehog might've seemed fine in-source but maybe he's fucked up from all that he's been through. That warrior cat alterhuman isn't just being edgy, maybe they're suffering from the memories of fighting to survive day in and day out. Bluey is allowed to be not okay, and their source shouldn't dictate their experiences. Do you ever think that some Pokemon or trainers don't have amazing, adventurous lives travelling around with their best friends? Mario might have nightmares and flashbacks from his source. Mickey Mouse is allowed to be hurt, and allowed to express that. That MLP alterhuman isn't always going to be just a happy colourful magic pony with no issues whatsoever.

We are PEOPLE, and our sources being "happy", "for kids", "light-hearted", "fun" or anything of the sort should NOT dictate how we are treated here, what our experiences are "allowed" to be, or how we are expected to act. Treat fictionkind--of all sorts--like PEOPLE.

[sysventing]

it’s so hard being a fictive-heavy system sometimes… we have 17 fictives at last count, and i’ve been anxiously worrying over them near constantly. or uh. less of themselves specifically and more about how people treat them. some people just get so… weird about it! please, stop idolizing them because they’re your favorite character! we’ve had multiple people genuinely get upset at us because our fictive sysmates don’t closely align with THEIR OWN HEADCANONS??? THAT THEY ARE PROJECTING ONTO US FOR??? SOME REASON?

this isn’t even scraping the surface! we’ve had people get so condescending about their identity to their source, whether they still identify with it or not! someone once attempted to force one of our sysmates to completely separate himself from his exomemories when he hadn’t even existed for a day, and it nearly sent him into a dangerous spiral that would’ve ended with us hurt! can people PLEASE be normal to fictives for once?? would it kill them to be respectful and kind for once??

.

[plurapony]

Introjects are SO much more than "I'm Just that Character!"

Introjects, whether fictive or factive, all have a role they contribute to the system, they have a reason why they exist. Sometimes that is being source connected and an exact copy of their source! BUT THAT ISN'T ALWAYS THE CASE!!!!

To demonstrate what I'm talking about I want you all to meet Shy, Flora and Petalfluff. All three are introjects of the character Fluttershy from My Little Pony. But all three are very very different and the ways they have introjected from Fluttershy is different.

Shy introjects mainly Fluttershy's shy and innocent qualities. He himself scares very easily and his role in the system is to be a childlike part.

Flora introjects Fluttershy's love for animals as well as her assertiveness. Flora does not have any qualities of being shy - to the point where sometimes she says it's like she's introjected from Mean Fluttershy. Because of her fierceness, Flora is a protector in the system.

Petalfluff introjects the well roundness of Fluttershy's character, the assertiveness when she needs to but also the timidness. The most important part of what Petalfluff introjects is Fluttershy's ability to be kind and see the best in the world. She's hopeful and encourages us to always take the route of kindness. Petalfluff's role in the system is housekeeper.

Introjects rely on perception, and as you can see for a multi-faceted character or person there can be multiple different perceptions. Introjects themselves are multi-faceted and there's so much more under the surface than what a lot of people think.

The brain is simply taking some, or all, traits from a pre-existing character or person in an event of stress or trauma in order to benefit the well-being of the overall system. If you are an introject and are super source connected! That's so cool, a bunch of our introjects are also source connected! Just know that isn't always the case :)

[IMAGE ID: ponyville is (pro) endo free zone break dni and get blocked loser! END ID]

[hellgai]

✦ Planoject …

A Planogect is a term used to describe a headmate whose source is a planet. This doesn’t have to be one of the eight, any planet. { includes pluto }

[moonpool-system]

I love you fictives with problematic or hated sources. I love you fictives that're terrified of showing up and existing around others because of terrible things that your sourceselves, source content, or creators have done. I love you whether or not the hate toward that fiction is justified because you're not your exact fictional source. You're real. I love you fictives that desperately try to explain yourselves and your situation because it was so different from the inside and you're trying so hard to be better. I love you fictives whose identity and experiences still mean a lot to you, and you're working every single day to balance that with the reality of media either harmful or perceived as harmful.

You're real. You're people. Your existence is not inherently terrible or amoral- only you decide your impact on this world.

[All plurals can interact, singlets can too if you don't clown]

[jwi-coins-stuff]

Brand New Introject Term Let's Go

Source Twin

This term is meant to be used as an alternative to "double". This term is both inspired by identical twins as well as the concept of "twinning" with someone (which in this context means that there's some aspect of two people that match in some way shape or form). Rather than feeding into the idea that introjects are "copies" of each other, this term refers to introjects as their own unique person while still acknowledging similarities between introjects that are sourced from the same character.

As a little bonus for you guys, here's an introject flag! (Flag made by @ambonexus as usual <3)

[Image ID: A five-striped flag with a light purple stripe, light pink stripe, white stripe, teal stripe, and blue stripe from the top down. End ID.]

[chemicalcarousel]

Our introject everytime we see someone thirstpost about their source self

[iwillbreakyourfuckingskull]

When someone tells you (pwDID) that you used to be a little girl suffering through horrific abuse, but you are a 35 y/o man who's always been that age:

[just-another-alter-blog]

I doubt I'm the only person who's dealing with this, but I'm feeling quite lonely in being an alter who formed as having an internal age being much older than the body (mid-late 30s), but I formed in our late teens and went dormant in our early 20s? maybe 20-21? And only resurfaced again a few months ago now we are 28.

I feel simultaneously like a depressed teenage girl and a 30-something y/o man. It's very confusing, especially because I'm a fictional introject and I don't really feel like many people would understand how different I am to my "source"? I see myself as looking similar, but this character is a ruthless military commander and I'm the manifestation of teenage girl depression 😅 Like, I remember we used to be extremely depressed and were attempting or at least planning our suicide all the time and we felt like we were the worst person in the world. Uh, I still feel that. I hold all those old feelings of guilt and shame like I'm just "wrong" for just existing. I guess this character had a part of his story being that he hated himself for causing his dad to die by accident and he felt like he could never atone for his sins as he lead people to die on the battlefield as a military commander and had a lot of survivor's guilt. Like, I get why we introjected him, I guess? But I'm feeling so embarrassed by being such a failure of an alter. I guess my whole point as a part is to hold all of these feelings of shame and survivor's guilt from our trauma, but it's hard. I feel like I was supposed to be a big, strong man, but I'm weaker and more fragile than our parts that visually look like children. Or that's how I feel. I think being dormant through some very important years, including me last being host/co-host when we still lived in our abusive home and were wrongly diagnosed/medicated, has made me more "immature" in many ways

I'm actually genuinely shaking right now writing this 😅 I feel like crying. It's so confusing and weird surviving trauma. It's so weird being an introject and not matching your source that much. Idk what to say, but I just need to let some of this out

Anyway, I'm gonna try to be brave and talk more and let myself exist if I can. This healing journey is scary, but uh... I'll do it scared 😅

[reimeichan]

We have an introject of our mother. Of our father. Our middle school crush, our ex who was our partner of 14 years, a teacher, a friend of a friend. I wish people talked more about the introjects of the people around them. It took a long time for these parts of us to understand and realize they're not literally the people they introjected, and even longer to unlearn the behavior they picked up trying to be the source in our head. Telling us what to do and how to act.

They're replicas of our abusers and of people who are non longer in our life. A reminder of the people who affected us that we can't escape or ignore even when the person themselves are long gone.

And there's the introjects of people who are still in our life. How do I explain to people that I have a mirror image of my partner as a literal part of me? When that mirror image takes control of my mouth and body and eerily imitates the person they're based off of, in the very same room we're in?

I know the community likes talking about introjects of fictional characters or celebrities or streamers, people who you likely would never have a personal relationship with. I want more people talking about the introjects of people that existed in their lives and left such a mark that you carry them with you as a part of yourself. Maybe I just want to be less alone, being one of them myself.

[ratinacoat]

Why people are against RAMCOA

If you scroll through posts in the system community you have most likely seen a handful of people posting about RAMCOA being a bad term. Here is why!

Contrary to what many people think when they see these posts; those people are not denying that your trauma is real. When people are saying RAMCOA isn't real, they're talking about what that term actually means. RAMCOA is misused and misunderstood a lot on the internet. How? I'll go into that.

Where it came from

RAMCOA (Ritual Abuse, Mind Control, and Organized Abuse) is a term that used to be used to be called SRA (Satanic Ritual Abuse) and is now called OEA (Organized and Extreme Abuse)

These terms were created by the ISSTD (International Society for the Study of Trauma and Dissociation), an organization that studies trauma and dissociation, if the name didn't give that away. Each of these terms were used at different times, replacing one another on the ISSTD's SIG (Special Interest Groups) page. In order, it went: SRA, RAMCOA, OEA

SRA was created during a point in time called the Satanic Panic. The Satanic Panic is still going on today but isn't as talked about anymore. It is/was a moral panic about Satanic cults that had over thousands of victims. The thing is, those cults never had proof of existing. Despite thousands of accusations of murder being made, nothing was ever found to prove this. The Satanic Panic is considered a conspiracy theory.

Over time it became clear to groups such as the FBI, CIA, and general law enforcement that these claims weren't actually true, or at least the stories were twisted. FBI Special Agent, Kenneth V. Lanning stated that "ritual" child abuse was not something people should fear due to that lack of evidence despite 50,000 claims of children falling victims to these cults being made.

Antisemitism

When you look at what RAMCOA means on social media, the words alone, and simple definitions, it's not easy to see the antisemitism behind it. However, looking into what the term describes, is used for, and the history of it allows you to see just how the term is antisemitic.

To understand, we need to first go back to the Satanic Panic and what that was. Moral panic about Satanic cults with no proof behind them. During the Satanic Panic, many people were falsely accused of being members of these cults, sacrificing and abusing children, ECT with no proof behind it. Now, we move on to another topic; Blood Libel.

Blood Libel is an antisemitic conspiracy theory that has existed for a very long time. It is the belief that Jewish people are sacrificing non-Jewish children (typically Christians) to use their blood for rituals during/close to Passover. There have been accusations of these things made on Jewish people with no evidence of them what so ever.

Sound familiar?

This is exactly what was happening during the Satanic Panic. The only difference is that they are not out right saying it was Jewish people. However, take into consideration that hardcore Christians often call anything or anyone that doesn't follow their religion "Satanic" and investigators have noticed that within the SRA/RAMCOA conspiracy theories as well.

The Satanic Panic, SRA/RAMCOA, and Blood Libel all directly connect to one another in terms of belief, theories, and actions even if they don't explicitly state that. Conspiracy theorists don't want you to doubt them for any reason, they want you to share their beliefs. Making their antisemitism less explicit helps them do that.

What's wrong about using it

You can't separate something like this from its origin and meaning. It's a harmful term directly connected to these conspiracy theories rooted in antisemitism. The ISSTD changed SRA to RAMCOA and RAMCOA to OEA but the meanings still stay the same. They still discuss "ritual abuse" and "mind control" in their OEA SIG.

The meanings have always stayed the same despite the names/acronyms changing. Members of the RAMCOA SIG were still a part of the SRA SIG and now moved on to the OEA SIG. They still use the term SRA within the SIG with certain members that have been around since the SRA SIG.

By using these terms you are labeling yourself with outdated/controversial terms (ritual abuse and mind control) that are directly connected to the antisemitic conspiracy theories that hurt Jewish people still. Normalizing the usage of these terms is harmful, it allows the conspiracy theorists to further push people away from associating the term with their wrong doings while they continue to do wrong. Jewish people have expressed their discomfort with this. They have expressed how unsafe they feel in the system community because of this.

You cannot call your blogs, servers, accounts, ECT a safe space for systems if that doesn't include Jewish systems.

Alternatives

Instead of using harmful terms such as RAMCOA or the outdated/controversial terms like ritual abuse and mind control, use the more common and correct terms to describe your abuse.

Institutional abuse

Religious abuse

Phycological abuse

Sexual abuse

Organized abuse (Not OEA)

Sadistic abuse

Cult abuse/survivor

Trafficking (survivor)

Some people have expressed concern that these downplay their experiences. Remind yourself that these terms are not specific to the severity. Any severity of physical abuse is still physical abuse. The term you use will never downplay your experiences. You don't need a term to tell other victims "I had it worse than you."

These terms are just more specific terms for abuse. If it helps you, put "severe" in front of the term you use. It may help you feel less like you're downplaying your experiences. But keep in mind that your experience stays the same no matter what. A term does not change what you went through.

Sources

Sources listed below show proof of connection between the ISSTD and RAMCOA, the things they believe, the psychiatrists from the SRA SIG being involved, Kenneth V. Lannings report on SRA, time lines of the Satanic Panic, and articles showing how Jewish people are being effected/how QAnon is a part of this.

Investigator's Guide to Allegations of "Ritual" Child Abuse

Blood Libel

The Satanic Panic in the Missouri General Assembly

RAMCOA SIG (Web Archive)

Ritual Abuse, Mind Control, & Organized Abuse Special Interest Group (RAMCOA SIG)

Ritual Abuse, Mind Control, & Organized Abuse (RAMCOA) SIG

QAnon, Blood Libel, and the Satanic Panic

America's Satanic Panic Returns - This Time Through QAnon

[thickramen]

PLEASE for the love of GOD stop treating introjects like they're some special type of alter. Unless they're pathological, they're exactly like every other alter you have. And if they are pathological, that just means they need extra therapy for source separation and building up their own identity.

And please people I BEG you stop treating your introjects like their damn source !!! It does no one good and encourages unhealthy source connection.