#Near is bit to white
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Anyways all my art is gone, and my PC is dysfunctional so I won't be posting art on this platform anymore. Here is one of latest works [unfinished], picture taken with the camera of my phone. I looked up towards this art but shit, this is all I got for now
Also let me introduce y'all to the new character (my OC) and Near's secret boyfriend, Chris. Near isn't with Mello for several reasons in my story (although he loves him), anyways here is Chris. (Never did his left eye)
They are all very pretty because Near dates only 'the prettiest guys', prick
Fuck it, that's all of me guys
#meronia#no more art from suckerforthisshit#near#mello#death note#Near is bit to white#haven't got time to add cool in his skin#fuck it
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they tried to rebrand as The Criminals but riz is literally the city council's treasurer and also turns out people in their late 20s don't really name their friend groups. so now they're The Intrepid Heroes
#fantasy high#figueroth faeth#kristen applebees#adaine abernant#gorgug thistlespring#fabian seacaster#riz gukgak#yes this is sorta from the same thing Ive been doing for future!riz lol. that riz is the same design basically#just the above board sona#u can kiiinda tell which of the bad kids I have a very clear vision for their future design and which I kinda wing it for lol#kristen's tank top is white and the coat is galaxy tie dye btw. I didnt have the energy to express that in ink but thats the ult version#adaine I truly imagine to grow up to be the perpetual t shirt and jeans person but she carries her sword everywhere#gorgugs truth is that shes just hot she can wear anything. but I do give him the skirt hike bc I love him#I really like skirt hike... such a fun thing to put in designs. if ur garment has no variance in how it falls or drapes u can do it urself#this is also a little bit of an exercise in how much of an accessory I can freehand from memory#fig's bass I straight up did not fact check for. just rawdogging it memory only. same with fandrangor and adaine's crocs#I did write in my funny little document that gorgug takes up baking and is good at it bc I think itd be good for him#to do basically chemistry and math that also feeds people#out of them... kristen and riz would be Good good at it. but riz would get way too stressed abt the recipe and kristen bakes by#eyeballing the texture. fabian likes decorating but refuses to get anywhere near the heat of an oven. adaine isnt good at it first try#and is like well my effort goes to other things actually. fig Loves baking and Nobody lets her into the kitchen#idk why this manifests so clear in my head. must be bc of recent foccacia events#living in the subtropics is hell for baking nobody try it ok? I tell u
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PILOT EPISODE
#so glad ppl liked my first post sm 😭#this ones a bit older and i kinda gave up near the end so dont mind some laziness dhhdnsjd#art#jesse pinkman#walter white#skyler white#hank schrader#walt jr#flynn white#marie schrader#breaking bad#brba#also my artstyle is somehow inspired by oingo boingo#idk everytime i listen to oingo boingo i think of an artstyle like this#i love it sm
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one of the few wide angle scenes we get of syd and carm this season, and they’re an entire island apart. literally and figuratively.
i think this scene is the most accurate visual representation of sydney and carmy this season. they have never felt so far away while being so close, and this is for a multitude of reasons.
first of all, carmy is locked deep into the crevices of his own mind because of his trauma and setbacks. secondly, sydney is terrified this season. this is what she’s wanted right? why doesn’t it feel that great then. this isn’t the guy she thought she’d be doing it all with, and now she has this opportunity to not have to do it at all, but at what cost.
third and final, communication has never been syd and carmys best area. as individuals i mean, of course. because when they connect and are together? their communication is truly something out of this world. it can start off pretty fucking a bit rocky, but they get there eventually. but as individuals, their communication is simply… not the best.
and this season, that is exactly what they are. individuals. they are not a team, they are not a partnership. carm retracts this offer while still expecting her all, and sydney doesn’t know how to properly communicate how fucking terrible that is for them, because they both agreed that this would be something they do as one.
but again, that connection has never been farther than it is right now
#ouuu guys i’m not gonna lie im getting into this season#not no where near as much as i did season two#but i am just a little bit#carmy berzatto#sydney adamu#sydcarmy#the bear#ayo edebiri#jeremy allen white
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no matter what he tries, he can't get the eyes right.
#leo.txt#leo.png#skyblock kingdoms#drtrog#rubyco#sadmilkman#avidmc#OKAY. ALT TEXT MENTIONS IT BUT HERE'S EXPLANATIONS FOR EACH#i draw trog with triangle pupils. clone trog's eyes are normal.#cloneby doesn't have heterochromia and their scar is on the wrong side#cloneman's eyes are white because his irises are only on the top layer and dnerds was considering him having a herobrine moment lmao#and originally avid's eyes were going to be the same as i normally draw him: purple but with a red tint and red highlights#(which is remnants of him having red eyes during Nightmare)#but that was because of him selling his soul to the Dark Lord and he has a different master now...#and i remembered that one bit of Limbo where his eyes turn pink-purple like Olm's. so#i like this a lot. this came out near exactly as i wanted#OH ALSO THE BG COLORS ARE THE TIE COLORS except avid's. avid's is ossha shirt color#bc otherwise itd be same as cloneman's#sbk#sbk spoilers
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I need advice.
I’m a white intern working in a mostly white southern(ish) high school. Students of Color number at under 2%, perhaps even lower. It’s a very white, rural community - I grew up in a fairly mixed, suburban northern community, and part of my family is Black.
Several of my white students say rude things to my Students of Color. I’ve told them to knock it off *as appropriately as I can* but I’m probably one of the few adults that actively discourage that behavior.
I don’t want to let this shit fly under the radar, but I also know that if an adult of authority *who will only be here for a couple more weeks* interferes, and then doesn’t stick around, it could make things worse. Additionally, I know these kids are probably very very very used to this ‘system’ and that making a short-term change could be more harmful than helpful.
I asked one of my senior students after a very racist incident *where she was laughing along with the perpetrator but I told him to stop anyway* that I can move him, or her, so she could be more comfortable (admin either does nothing or slaps wrists, especially for seniors). She said it was fine and that he was always like that.
I must emphasize, I think they were bantering (they talk so much I think they consider each other friends?), but it was also wayyy fucking out of line, especially in a school setting. And the guy says so much out of line shit I’m surprised he isn’t rocking a full set of dentures to replace the teeth he ought to have lost by now.
Another student took me up on my offer to move people, but I ended up moving him, which sucks because he was the victim in this situation. Unfortunately, I have to keep his aggressors in their spots, as they are highly rowdy in all the ways and require a lot more supervision than he did. And the class is really full. These were also all freshmen, so I wouldn’t be surprised if that affected the victim’s reaction.
So I’d really appreciate advice as to whether I should let it be, or continue as is, or step it up even more, from People of Color in largely white, especially rural, communities. Like any advice from current or previous educators, especially Educators of Color would be appreciated, but specifically southern/rural ones would be wonderful. I’m going to talk to my family members about it, but they’ve lived in more Northern settings their entire lives and they may have less … applicable (?) experience to the situation.
Again, I’m an intern, I’m going to only be there until winter break 2024, and I don’t want to fuck things up for these kids in the long run with my northern ally ‘sensibilities’. Thank you!
#education#help#advice#educators of color#students of color#academia#slightly more context: the senior was a Black girl. there are not a lot of Black students but there’s multiple of them from different#families (though I also tutor her little brother). so she may have community to fall back upon and that might feel like enough for her#the freshman boy is mixed Asian and as far as I can tell is the only Asian kid currently in this high school#since we’re in Appalachia of course a lot of people say shit like ‘my great grandmother was Cherokee’ (apologies to the Cherokee community#but I’m quoting these people) but some of my students are much more tan and experience a bit of colorism. again I try to shut that down but#idk how far to take it. the one girl who is definitely Indigenous (I’m not going to specify further because it’s a small community) doesn’t#seem to be treated negatively for it and seems quite proud so I’m glad for her#but she also passes as one of the tan students so idk if she’s just comfortable bringing it up around me and it doesn’t come up near#racist students or what.#more context I forgot to bring up: I’m pretty sure most if not all of the Black students are mixed or have mixed parents. so they may#have white family members that make this system of poor treatment seem okay? or white family members#who help compensate for the racist people in the community?#I really don’t fucking know and I really don’t want to make things worse for anyone#getting ‘aggressive’ protection from a student intern may NOT be helpful#idk#thank you for reading this far
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just accidentally stumbled on an egwene hate reddit thread and everyone was bitching about how she tries to act like rand's equal when she's only the second-most powerful authority figure on the continent, and one sane person was like "well, balance was a huge theme of the series, so it's pretty clear that RJ did consider the dragon and the amyrlin two halves of a whole and that rand is meant to be egwene's equal co-authority rather than her superior" and of course they were downvoted to hell. and this one little thread just really epitomizes how the readers who approach WOT as a male power fantasy just fundamentally will never understand the series and its themes and the story it was ACTUALLY telling.
#and probably also why they hate the show so much and insist it's nothing like the books#because the show is telling the same story the books were telling#but this medium makes it harder for you to ignore the story being told and convince yourself the version you made up is what's there#wot#wot book spoilers#and of course that thread was full of takes like 'the point is to show that egwene=tuon and amyrlin seat=crystal throne#and the white tower is just as bad as the seanchan and everyone should shut up and listen to rand'#and 'egwene was an abusive bully and thank god she died in TLB or the world would've been screwed in the fourth age'#UGH#and even the argument of people trying to be more ~fair~ is just 'egwene's a terrible person but a great character'#UGH!!!! she is literally one of the most morally righteous people in the series#and her bad moments are nowhere near as bad or as numerous as the war crimes rand pulls#yet no one ever doubts that RAND is ultimately a good person who stumbled here and there#(ig maybe egwene's TAR nynaeve thing is worse than anything rand did? but it's also abundantly clear that RJ had no idea HOW bad it was#so i take that moment with a bit of a grain of salt since i really don't think he grasped the severity of what he wrote there#and if he had he very likely would have written it differently)
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Made this keychain while i was sad for Logan after the race. I'm so happy with the result and also i think doodles and references come out good ฅ^•ﻌ•^ฅ
I put more pics under cut if you want to see!!!
There some photos without any drawings plus just doodles bc it's easy to miss something with how much I going on there 😭
Also i finally have plase to rumble about every little detail (tags)
#ls2#logan sargeant#“matching with osc” bc i used same bead on oscar charm i wear#also used my favourite picture of hin fishing#and his eyes#why can't i understand what colour exactly are they#so i used two beads to represent them#also i love how white and blue line merge a bit when they cross#ones near “Williams”#also metal eyes represent pressure on him this season#i thought it was cool#also i added as much stars ar i could#firstly because Logan is MY star#but also because AMERRRRICA 🦅🦅🦅#also i think I'm sooooo funny for that eagle charm#and i still find so endearing the fact that Logan loves fishing#i needed to find references to draw that fish#also literally everything I drawn with my finger#I'm so proud of the result#f1#williams racing#also moonstone is there for the whole “logan is the moon and oscar is sun” thing#i love pain and loscar as you can see#also i love golden bead for his hair bc it have really pretty colour and the vibe is very right for him#i think that's all#thanks for reading#I'm so in love with creating
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Josie Pinup for @thedeafprophet ;) (full nudity below the cut)
i think october wants her cloak back josie 🤭
(based on this:)
#(yes i can draw legs properly HOWEVER josie has EDS so i wanted to have her hyper-extending the one knee because. she deserves to be#seen as pretty Including her bendy joints damnit!!!!!!!)#anyways#phantom of the opera moments much josie? my my#you guys would not BELIEVE how my phone has SLAUGHTERED this piece in particular!!! i can't even do my normal little photo app editing trick#(telling my phone to use the 'enhance' or 'contrast' settings :( )#like. in person josie is super super smeared and washed out in her reflection! but october is actually only a tiny bit smeared and not#washed out at all! so she Sticks Out a lot!!! because she's a parabolan ghost with a lot of parabolan power mastery and i wanted her to seem#... Disturbingly Tangible#but my phone picks up on fucking NONE of that#and yet somehow it's picking up and EMPHASIZING all this white texture and spotting that is legitimately Barely Visible in person#and like. her stretch marks are nowhere near as bright!! they're nice and natural looking i prommy#and it's over-emphasizing the lightness of her palms too aaaaaaaa#anyways. I'm crying over how my phone just. murders my art for funsies. waugh#please please please i promise it looks a thousand times better in person 😭😭😭#her face too :(#alas alas.#dye stained art#suggestive#also tmblr don't kill me this is a fuckung pinup. artistic nudity. aaa#sometimes i will just draw ocs naked for stress relief!!! because i like how bodies are shaped#hnnnnnng gold ink <3#mirrors#ask to tag#others ocs#josie
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Hello dear followers! It is I, white artist! Because I believe in diversity I took this Japanese character (who I view as white) and turned them into a Black character (which is the only (overgeneralised) ethnicity I see the inclusion of as diversity) Perhaps when this does well I shall make some fanart of my favourite middle eastern, south east asian, and desi characters (whitewashed, of course) as a reward! and then maybe I'll write a rant about how Japanese Media about Japanese characters lacks diversity due to its all white cast.
#Like everytime I see this (spesificially with Japanese characters) it just tells me the artist views them as white people by default#I'm not talking about drawing fanart and changing the skin tones to be a bit varied and realistic that's good and greay#I'm spesificially talking about making “race headcanons” about charactersv#Also can I also mention this media I like where there's a mixed character who's half Japanese half French which is an aspect in the story1#2with him being treated as a gaijin even though he was born in Japan and only grew up there but the fandom barely acknowledges it#And then 3 there's a middle eastern character but people erase the fact that he's middle eastern in favour of making him a different-#Ethnicity and like as a MENA person I Love him dude we barely have representation that's anywhere near positive he's great lemme have him#Stop making him another ethnicity for more diversity points#anyways Japanese people are poc stop seeing them as white and racebending them for more diversity#Anyways#Japan#Diversity#Fandom#Canon diversity#canon vs fanon#Fanon#Art#Drawing#Fanart#tumblr
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(mgv) adam's an only child and always wanted siblings but never got them. he's still estranged from his parents. when he gets with lawrence and he sees how sweet he is with diana, what was a passing thought of "he's such a good dad, shame diana's not got a sibling" spiraled entirely out of his control.
"i have the equipment to give him another pup one way or another"
"look at how happy lawrence is when diana stays for the weekends! he'd love another one around all the time!" maybe, like hell we're having that conversation though
"this way i can have the big family i always wanted" since when do i want kids???
"since you saw lawrence be a good dad to diana" ..... FUCK
#saw#sawmegaverse#chainshipping#mgv#taking some things from the early screenplay here#and of course. personal hc that adam found lawrence being a devoted father incredibly attractive#(i am not projecting. i am not projecting. i am not proje)#lawrence wouldn't mind a new baby but he wouldn't be crushed if adam didn't (maybe a little bummed but he'd get over it)#and lawrence just assumes adam wouldn't want one because.... he just never seemed interested#he's like besties with diana sure and he coddles her a bit when his heat starts nearing like an omega parent with their pup#but larry also already kinda. put adam in this mold of young punk. and wanting kids is not a trait he associates with “young punk”#(not an mgv exclusive trait. lawrence is just unfortunately an older white man raised to be stuffy)#but if adam shows interest in having pups lawrence is with him 110%#i am thinking a Lot of pup thoughts tonight clearly
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It's always interesting to hear about people's weird/unexpected "alternate life paths". Like, something that you could have done with your life, a job you almost took, a school you almost went to, etc - that was still actually realistic enough that it could have happened, but NOW it seems to not suit your current personality.
Like for example, I currently hate advertising (how manipulative it is, brands trying to be 'relatable', social media amplifying it to an obnoxious extreme, etc.) so much that even seeing a little ad before a youtube video is grating to even witness, but there was a point in time where I was genuinely seriously considering going into marketing/making commercials as a career lol. Or like, I have a relative who was very inclined to be a pastor when they were younger, even though today they're a super strong atheist, etc. etc.
#BECAUSE I knew I really liked filming and editing things and doing set design and costume design (from having done little bits of that#here and there in media classes and my own stuff - i used to be a lot more into making videos than I am now). BUT I was always thinking#that a movie is WAAY to big and long. even a short film. So I was trying to think of ways I could still like#have the fun of scouting locations to film and dressing up actors and etc. etc. without it having to be a Huge Million Dollar Production#on tv show or movie level. SO then I was thinking about like... just doing commercials. Or music videos. Like shorter things where I still#get the fun of the filming and everything but it's less of an intensive long term project.#So there is an alternate version of me (I suppose if i somehow did not end up having physical and mental health issues#as badly somehow.. or like.. randomly came into wealth and was able to pay my way through a nice college despite missing#days constantly being out because I'm sick or something lol) that works in some corporate advertising office coming up with commercials#and directing or filming them or doing the sets for them or something in that general vicinity.#I also was considering being a corporate psychologist. or whatever its called.. oh from google:#''Industrial and organizational (I/O) psychologists study and assess individual group and organization dynamics in the workplace''#I don't think I even knew what the job entailed. I was at the time just thinking like.. the type of person that comes into a business offic#and gives everyone personality assessments or does MBTI or big-5 testing crap for whatever reason that some businesses get that#done for people. Really i just wanted to be in a Corporate Big Office setting yet still do psychology. Because I used to be really fixated#on living in a big city. Like the ideas of everything being walkable. picking up a coffee in the morning. walking to my job in a Big#Skyscraper Building. people watching in a huge hotel lobby for lunch. flying frequently (I love airplanes and airports aesthetically).#living in an apartment with a giant window overlooking the city. etc. etc. BUT that was before i had really BEEN to a city. Then I actually#hung around a city a few times and went places and I was like... AUGh... The Sensory Overwhelm.. cars people lights loudness noise scary#everything happening all at once. etc. etc. (though even when I wanted to live in a city i NEVER strove for the Night Life. when i say I#enjoy city imagery I mean like... in the day time. Many people who like cities talk about The Night Life and post pictures of cities all#lit up at night and clubs and dancing and restaurants. none of that EVER appealed to me. perhaps a sign I am not a real city person. Like#I am NOT standing in a crowded bar full of loud people in the middle of the night lol.. get AWAY from me!!) but I do adore the#architecture of like bright white clean sterile modern spaces like huge airport lobbies or malls or etc. I think thats what reminded me of#city and what I liked about the idea of that life. Like I always LOVED the layout of schools and hospitals and trainstations and public#transport in general. Though even then I knew enough that I would not be a good architect/city planner. so I guess my adoration for those#spaces was merely to be channeled into LIVING there. but then I realized I didn't even really want to do that that much. I mean I still#definitely aim to live NEAR a city. like the little areas outside of it. I would never live in a rural place 4 hours from anything. I liter#ally just COULDNT since I need close access to hospitals sometimes lol. But I used to want to live in the CENTER of citites like high rise#condo. and now I'm like.... eh....... perhaps a smaller quieter walkable space nearby lol.. ANYWAY.. alternate me in my Business Suit eheh
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Sometimes I feel like I'm shit at cooking
But at other times I feel like I've absolutely fucking peaked with the culinary arts
#meg is rambling#this is one of the latter moments :3#i was completely winging it to use up some mince that was near expiry#fried some diced mushrooms up; added white wine to the pan they were fried in with a bit of water garlic and salt#after it cooked down a bit mixed in some double cream until it was a bit thicker; threw in some pre-cooked homemade meatballs#(then cheated because I was overheating and added peppercorn sauce granules to thicken it and give it a peppery taste)#then mixed in mushrooms for those who liked them and dumped it on a pile of oven chips#🥺🤤 so fucking good
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bad wolf soda <3
#level of obsession reached where i zoom in on screenshots to see what shes reading#p sure that says kierkegaard in white but thats as far as im getting#'first existentialist philosopher'#okay i really gotta find out what the fuck existentialism really means now bc carmilla seems to like it#'related to the meaning purpose and value of human existence.#Common concepts in existentialist thought include existential crisis dread#and anxiety in the face of an absurd world and free will as well as authenticity courage and virtue.'#SCREAM OKAY I SEE I SEE#kierkegaard beauvoir sartre nietzsche camus yep p sure those all get mentioned#okay this is fun#kierkegaard was like an existentialist before the word and hes from the first half of the 19th century#dont know if you can call vampires contemporaries of people bc....immortal. but carmilla was a contemporary of him#technically#and then when existentialism gets named halfway the 20th century carmilla has just escaped her blood coffin punishment#and so shes alone for a little bit without direction. perhaps free or perhaps waiting for mother to show up again#it's fun that existentialism seems sort of to be abt there being a choice abt who you want to be#that youre not defined by an essence. that What You Are is not defined pre what you do#so you can shape yourself#it's interesting the tension between that belief and the position carmilla is in. no wonder theres self-loathing#but also! she starts resisting the What She Is that is imposed on her. after 1945. starts sabotaging plans#i gotta go download some books#'ive got a talk i wanna catch on goethe' hang on im googling#1749-1832 she lived through that too#oh right faust and young werther i know of those#'Goethe admitted that he 'shot his hero to save himself' a reference to Goethe's near-suicidal obsession for a young woman a passion he que#relatable#god theres so much to read in the world and i have not read any of it#carmillaposting#i wonder what she'd write her dissertation about
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i need to speak to a man my age or i will kill myself
#back home i got a good mix of genders amongst who i have befriended. here its all girls. because i go to an all girls school#i did not want to. i am a pushover#the other day i saw a white dude my age at the supermarket and i seriously considered going up to him and asking if he spoke english#^he is the only other white person ive seen in my ward lmao#other day a kid of maybe 17 tried to get me to join his sailing team. i almost said i would#if not men i need to find some masculine dykes at leeeast#time to look up gay bars near me. because i guess i can do that now wow.#the gay bit not the bar bit ive been to my fair share of shitass pubs
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#hiding this in the tags bc it’s kind of embarrassing and i need to get it off my chest#and i could journal about it but i just want someone to see me#sorry for being cringe <333#but i don’t know what the hell i am like i don’t know if i’m even nonbinary anymore and that scares me like being nonbinary felt like coming#home after a long trip#and now i’m having all these thoughts about wanting to be a man? like near tears rn bc i want to be a guy but then when i think of actually#being a guy i freak out a bit#bc i like being seen as feminine too and i know that there are feminine men and they get treated so terribly#and i feel like all the men i see that i want to be like or look like are white! why don’t i see any black trans men like i feel so alone#and i’m scared to look/be openly trans bc there’s so much violence against people like us that it feels safer to just cosplay as a cis woman#even though i’m not#like i don’t want to be a boy but i want to be one and i absolutely don’t want to be a girl but i’d like to be seen as someone sometimes#it’s all very confusing#AND like i know i’m biromantic like im attracted to all genders and people#but im like? am i on the ace spectrum#bc i have a low sex drive am often sex repulsed and will sometimes ‘test’#myself to see if im sexually attracted to people and most of the time it’s like#it’s like meh not really but sometimes im like sure but that’s rarer and rarer these days?? and like. tmi here but i jerk off and enjoy it#so i can’t be asexual right?? i tried looking it up but the articles just confused me#but then i also am like with the right person if i had a connection to them i wouldn’t mind having sex with them! but like. then i think#about actually having to be in a relationship and i’m like gross no but i think that’s just relationship trauma and fear of being#vulnerable#and like i know i don’t HAVE to have a label on my gender or sexuality but for me personally it helps to know What i am#and and i love butches so so so much and if i’m a man how can i love butches? like#it’s all so confusing#i feel like i’m 14 and going through puberty again
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