#firstly because Logan is MY star

[imerian]

Made this keychain while i was sad for Logan after the race. I'm so happy with the result and also i think doodles and references come out good ฅ⁠^⁠•⁠ﻌ⁠•⁠^⁠ฅ

I put more pics under cut if you want to see!!!

There some photos without any drawings plus just doodles bc it's easy to miss something with how much I going on there 😭

Also i finally have plase to rumble about every little detail (tags)

[eiy-lei]

Royal Rumble 2024:A Review (2/2)

Before you start reading, I'd recommend you check out part 1 of this review here:-

Now, onto the next match of the night.

Roman Reigns Vs LA Knight Vs AJ Styles Vs Randy Orton

This match was, to put it bluntly, extremely average unfortunately; it wasn't a bad match but considering the star power and stipulation I feel as though most people (myself included) expected more out of this match, it ended up being the weakest match on an already small card and didn't do much favors for anyone coming out of it.

However, there were some fun spots scattered throughout it, for example, this RKO shown above was absolutely amazing and for a split second, I really felt as though there was a chance for Orton to win it, alas that hope was quickly put to rest as for SOME reason, there was still a bloodline interference, defeating the purpose of the other participants in the fatal four way.

If you wanted to pull off a near fall, the producer of this match could've just made use of the stars already in it rather than recycle the same, uninteresting trope that recent Roman matches are notorious for.

On the topic of the match type, as nice as it was to see Styles and Knight in this position, they didn't do the match much favors in regards to improving the in-ring quality, Knight especially.

At the very least, AJ was involved in some note worthy spots such as a finisher fest leading to this stacked pinfall, other than though they didn't play much of a factor and I, at no point, was convinced that either of them could walk out the building as champion.

I'm not saying they're bad competitors, quite the contrary, it's just that they were both an ill-fit for this match, and it would've been better off just being Orton VS Reigns, and with how abruptly and anti-climactically the match ended, it further proves my point.

Overall, not a bad match, just an uninspiring one.

3/5 ***

Logan Paul Vs Kevin Owens

This match was my sign to stop underestimating Logan Paul because man he showed up and showed out; I should've stopped doubting his abilities a long time ago but for some reason I felt worried coming into this match, however those worries were soon washed away a few minutes into the match.

Of course, a lot of the credit goes towards Kevin Owens, who is one of the best performers of this generation and is usually able to bring a good match out of anybody but this match really broke all my expectations.

A fast paced, hard-hitting affair, the chemistry that these two have is incredible, whether it'd be in a stand-up brawl or high-flying action, Logan and Kevin were able to keep up with each other no matter where the match went, once they kicked it up a notch they never slowed down.

One more thing that also really impressed me was Logan's selling ability, for someone with less than 10 matches of experience (at the time of this match) he sold Kevin's offence like a seasoned veteran: natural, dynamic and in-character, with each facial expression adding to the pain that he felt, he did a marvelous job in playing a snarky, cowardly heel.

Of course I'd have to expect that by now, but it's always impressive no matter how many times I see it.

Lastly, the finish to this match was absolutely genius, it managed to both: solidify Logan as a lucky, conniving heel and protect Kevin Owens' integrity as a competitor in a way I haven't seen done in ages.

Overall, I was blown away and thoroughly enjoyed this match from start to finish.

4/5 ****

Men's Royal Rumble

I feel like this rumble did a lot of things right, was it better than the women's rumble? Not by a long shot but it was still a great viewing experience, that for a casual viewer, was sufficient enough, however for those within the IWC loop, this rumble was hurt by the burden of great expectations for surprise entrants.

As last year's rumble showed, surprise entrants aren't what make a rumble, the quality of the match does, with last year's match being very well done from beginning end, the same can be said of this match, very solid, however unlike last year, never reached that 2nd gear, Punk Vs Rhodes ending the match, to put it simply, just wasn't Rhodes Vs GUNTHER.

El Idolo makes a stunning return

The first thing this rumble did right was it's starting two entrants, with Jey entering at 1 and Jimmy entering 2nd, the first time the twins have faced off since Jey's move to raw all the way back at Payback.

An emotional reunion, the feels ran high right from the get-go, showing shades of what is to come at their eventual clash at mania.

Jimmy's performance in this match was a highlight throughout the rumble as he played the comedic heel very well; trying to form other alliances with other more ferocious heels, getting shut down violently each time.

Our first surprise entrant of the men's rumble came sooner than expected, with Andrade, fresh off of his AEW stint, making his return to the federation, decked out in his AEW presentation and name, which was surprising to me.

I love the fact that he gets to keep his original presentation, as seems to be common with most Triple H hirings, however admittedly I was looking forward to hearing his old theme again.

Andrade had a solid performance in this match, getting out all of his greatest hits like his rolling elbow, running seated Meteora and La Sombra, while also setting up future feuds against the likes of Santos Escobar and Dominik Mysterio until his eventual elimination.

Although not as impactful as an appearance as Jordynne Grace or Jade Cargill, he was still a solid component of this rumble, making his return a successful one.

The Truth is reborn

A great part of this rumble is that similarly to last years, it provided a lot of shine onto the current, stacked roster of the federation; Cody Rhodes, Shinsuke Nakamura, Gunther, Dominik Mysterio, Ivar and a plethora of other stars all entered into this star studded affair, but one of the few names that really made a mark on this rumble was R-Truth.

The fact that R-Truth is essentially in his second prime right now is absolutely insane, with his popularity soaring to heights that haven't been seen since his heel run with the Miz as a part of Awesome Truth over a decade ago.

I'm glad that he's finally getting his flowers as a performer though as, at 52 years old with over 2 decades of experience, it's about time that he'd be treated with the same benevolence as other stars with the same tenure, with his comedic ability being second to none in the current roster.

As highlighted in the video above, where he gets tagged in by Dominik and performs the first ever hot tag in a rumble, which admittedly, had me burst out with laughter.

BREAKKER SPEARS THE COMPETITION (!!!)

However no star shined brighter in this match than Bron Breakker, making his Main Roster PLE debut as a representative of NXT.

As rumours have it, this was supposed to be Brock Lesnar's spot, mowing down the competition and eliminating every moving target in sight as Brock usually would, but as a result of his recent allegations, this spot was filled in by Bron, and goodness gracious did he take the ball and run with it.

Bron looked like a star in this rumble, for consistent viewers of NXT in the past 2 years this was nothing new, but for the wider broader audience, they got their first taste of the unmatched intensity of Bron Breakker.

Agility, power and sheer athleticism all rolled into a ball of charismatic muscle, this match showed that Bron had everything needed to be a top star, sure he didn't make it to the final four of the rumble but the impact of his performance was felt, punching a spear sized hole into the minds of fans across the world.

This match showed that this was simply the beginning of a dominant rumble competitor, and surefire winner in the rumbles yet to come.

From tearing Ivar in half to dog-walking Omos, Bron Breakker IS THAT GUY, and I can't wait for everyone else to find out just how special that man is.

Pat MacAfee, unlike other silly entrants in past rumbles, didn't provide any sort of memorable moment or spot whatsoever, making his entry feel like a waste of a spot.

Not much more to say, short and un-needed, just like his rumble appearance, which is a shame because we all know how capable MacAfee is in the ring.

Sami Zayn at no. 30 wasn't a bad choice whatsoever, it's just that due to the abundance of rumors of various free agents across the industry, his appearance at 30 got a lot of backlash; similar to Rey's appearance in the 2014 rumble, not hated, just not what most fans wanted.

Although, his appearance didn't exactly affect the rumble that much which adds a bit more salt to the wound as if his appearance did impact the ending result of the rumble perhaps the IWC wouldn't have been as judgmental of this decision, however due to this lack of influence, it felt as though Sami was an afterthought in the grand scheme of things, contrary to Liv in the woman's rumble.

Lastly, we of course, we need to talk about the final 2 of Cody Rhodes and CM Punk.

At the time of viewing, I really did enjoy the final two and I'm sure that for most casual viewers it was a great viewing experience; a back and forth between 2 of the hottest stars in the industry, both of which had completely different paths back to the federation.

However, I must admit that, as emotionally charged as it was, it just wasn't as good in ring wise in comparison to Gunther Vs Cody, where Gunther Vs Cody felt like Rhodes overcoming an unbeatable final boss, Punk Vs Cody just felt like a bartender fending off a drunken old man at a pub.

Unfortunately, it was a very sloppy affair, and sure I suppose the struggle could play into how emotional the encounter was, the sluggishness adding to the realism, but that doesn't excuse it from being worse than last year, not bad, just not what it could've been.

Overall, this match was still a joy to watch from beginning to end, despite there being some rather stagnant stages, it always managed to pick up steam whenever it needed to most.

A great rumble, that's overshadowed by the women's rumble that took place only 2 hours before it.

4/5 ****

Thank you for reading everyone (!!!) I know this post took longer to come up than expected but since it's mania season I've been wanting to get these reviews up before Mania.

Have a lovely mania week everyone, see you all next time, good eve-after-morning (!!!)

[illuminatrice-yuletide]

Dear writer,

Firstly, a big big thank you for writing for me this year. I am a long time lurker of Yuletide but this is my first time participating, so I am super excited! I am happy to receive a gift from someone who appreciates the same fandoms, and am really looking forward to reading your gift during the holiday season.

General Likes

Friendship, friends to lovers, enemies to lovers, star crossed lovers, slice of life, hurt/comfort, angst with happy ending, characters with strong motivations, multi-dimensional characters and morally grey characters, world building, bonding over past trauma, staying as true to historical canon as realistically possible (understand it’s not always easy to know what is or isn’t accurate and bending the rules does make for fun fic), and fleshed out characters. Good grammar, spelling, and punctuation helps too.

General Do Not Wants

Omegaverse, Incest, SA/rape, Gore, Scat, Body horror, very graphic violence (i.e a fic that only focuses on violence), mpreg, PWP, any non vanilla sexual kinks, on-canon character death, 1st and second person POV, unrequested identity headcanons (i.e gender headcanons, asexual headcanons, etc), extremely anachronistic views in historical time periods, or language that would not fit the era (such as modern slang in a past century), and writing out dialogue with thick accents. If the story was an AU taking place in the modern era, would be OK with modern ways of communication, like lol or btw used in text messages. I am not a huge fan of having smut be the main driver of the plot, but I do like to read it if it brings complexity to the pairing’s relationship (for example describing them about to have sex, anticipating it, or the day after they’d had sex is good).

Requested fandoms

11th Century CE RFP Requested characters: Harold Godwinson, Tostig Godwinson, William the Conqueror, Edward the Confessor

This part of history is fascinating because there is SO MUCH DRAMA! These characters all have complex relationships with their parents, siblings, and with each other. Historically it’s clear how each of these people met their fate, but I’d be really happy to read a fic that describes snippets of their relationships to each other and how these moments led up to the Battle of Hastings. William and Harold can be demonised depending on which side people are on, so I’d prefer a fic that stays neutral to both. I find it fascinating that William and Harold met in 1064, two years before Hastings, but that it isn’t clear from sources exactly what transpired, so reading your take on what happened during that time would be really fun to read (but this is just a request, so feel free to ignore). I am happy to read William/Harold as enemies, having a brief romantic encounter, or as friends.

Do not wants: writing the characters’ dialogue with thick accents in the fic (describing them speaking with a different accent is fine, but I find reading dialogue in accents detracts from fic), making everyone a pure villain or hero, Edward the Confessor being feeble and weak as a ruler

2. Fable (game) Requested characters: Reaver, Sparrow (female), Hero of Brightwall, Logan

Who could resist Stephen Fry’s wonderful voice? Fable is one of my favourite games because it has such distinct British humour. I do ship Reaver and Sparrow together, and my headcanon is that Reaver is the father of the Hero of Brightwall and Logan (whether by accident or planned, that’s up to you). Sparrow and Reaver are both heroes who are tied to their fates, with no real say in the matter, so I do like the idea of them bonding over this. Reaver stonewalls (or kills) anyone who gets close to him in the game, but I’d love a story that explores more of his mysterious past and his role in the destruction of his hometown of Oakvale (his diaries in Fable II are heartbreaking). I do also like the added twist to their relationship that Sparrow sacrificing her youth to the Shadow Court caused her natural life to end early and Reaver regretting this.

Do not wants: rape in their relationship, abuse of the children, super OOC Reaver

3. WWI Flying Aces RFP Requested characters: Mick Mannock, James McCudden

I would love a fic exploring their relationship, platonic or otherwise. I do like the age/knowledge gap between them, with James being younger but more experienced as a pilot, and acting as a role model for Mannock. Mannock is definitely in awe of James�� skill as a pilot, but I see him as being protective of him as well because he is so young (much to the chagrin of James). Mannock was really an empathetic tortured soul and you can see this in his diary entries (some available here http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/magazine/7952995.stm). James I think hid his trauma better than Mannock, but I believe he would still have PTSD after the war. Both meet a tragic end in real life, but am happy to see an AU where they survive. I would be extra happy if they help each other get over their trauma somehow, whether that be through talking it out, being together, or another situation your imagination comes up with.

Do not wants: abusive relationship, rape, super nationalistic dialogue between these two

4. Dunkirk Requested characters: Farrier, Collins

These two are one of my favourite pairings! (Their interaction in the movie is brief, I know, I know). I would love to see a fic exploring how they both managed their emotions in a place and time where it could be seen as damaging to the cause, and where you had to suppress your true feelings to go out fighting the enemy each day. I don’t have a specific background headcanon for these two, but Farrier definitely has more experience fighting than Collins due to his age, so I imagine that maybe he was a young pilot during WW1, or somehow got into piloting shortly after WW1 ended. A happy ending for these two after all of the pain and suffering they had been through would warm my heart. Writing them either as a ship or friendship would be welcome.

Do not wants: Farrier mistreating Collins due to rank

5. Vikings: Valhalla Requested characters: Queen Emma, Earl Godwin, Prince Edward, Canute

Queen Emma and Earl Godwin have got a strong “I hate you, but I recognise you as my equal (not quite, but in a way)” vibe going on, which I adore. I see Emma as being absolutely faithful to Canute whom she loved in real life so much that she ignored the sons from her first marriage, so I don’t see them being together at any point until after Canute passes. Even then, I’m not sure they would sleep together, but I do like that “will they? or won’t they?” game they seem to play with each other at times. Earl Godwin is cunning and an expert social climber, but has serious hang ups about his family’s past, so if you can incorporate that in the fic that would be amazing! Bonus points if you can write about Prince Edward’s complex feelings towards his mother, who essentially abandoned him firstly for his safety, but then to pursue her own love interests.

Do not wants: abuse, infidelity on Queen Emma’s part when she’s marrried to Canute, physical abuse

6. The Irregulars Requested characters: Bea, Jessie, Leopold, Billy

I don’t think this series got a lot of love which is a shame, so a fic focused on Bea and her family, her relationship with Leopold (whether it continues after the series canon ending is up to you), or the crew having other adventures would be wonderful.

Do not wants: Incest, bad relationships between Bea and her family members, non canonical pairings

Thank you again for generously offering to write some of my most cherished characters, and I am looking forward to reading your work.

[fayevalcntine]

On the topic of Logan and cheating

I've seen a some different interpretations on this scene and one of the more infamous excuses for it is that a) Rory didn't call Logan after their argument at the bar, which meant that Logan could easily interpret the silence on her end as breaking up, and b) Rory was Logan's first serious relationship, therefore he doesn't exactly know how to properly communicate as a boyfriend and know whether they are or aren't really broken up. Another one that I've heard is that "you don't need to talk to someone in order to be broken up. Just look at how Jess and Rory broke up, he left and that was the end". All of these arguments are faulty to me for several reasons:

You can't compare Jess leaving for another state without properly telling Rory to be the same as Logan simply leaving a pub in Hartford and then not calling Rory. Jess relocated to the other side of the country. Logan on the other hand, simply stopped calling her. These two events aren't even remotely the same, especially when Rory didn't even know whether or not Jess would ever come back to Stars Hollow, let alone to see her. Logan by that point in season 6 still lives near Yale.

To place ultimate blame on Rory for this entire situation by saying that she was the one solely responsible for the "break"/"break up" because she didn't call him is in my opinion complete bull because Rory is not the only one in this relationship. She's not the only one that has to manage it, communication has to go both ways and on this end Logan repeatedly lacked awareness of by this point. "It was a fight. People fight." is Rory's response when Logan comes in trying to get her back, and his only excuse for seemingly breaking up with her through his sister is: "Yeah, well I don't fight, I don't want to be screaming at you at a bar. I can't take that. It's too much drama." To which Rory says: "Well, if you can't take the drama, then you shouldn't even be in a relationship, [...]" Rory knows that couples can have arguments and they need to communicate after that, which is something Logan doesn't even consider when presented with that point and just continues to badger Rory to get back together. At this point, his own story even switches depending on what is useful for him. At first he says that he only told Honor they were broken up to get her off her back, and once Rory asks if he then meant it, he backtracks and says he did.

This leads to my further point that Rory being Logan's first serious relationship is not a good excuse for his behavior, either. His way of handling this by completely shutting off any chance to simply call her after their fight is more reminiscent of how he behaved when they were "casual" in season 5. He kept ghosting her even at her repeated attempts at calling him, she has to get his attention by going out with his friend, and it's only until Rory shows up and tries to break things off that Logan decides to get together with her. By this point in season 6, even taking out the time where they weren't technically together, they had been dating for at least 4-5 months. There are numerous moments where we see Logan attempt to communicate with Rory about some stuff before this fight. So how is it any excuse to say that he "isn't experienced in relationships" if we can easily see that he has no problem wanting to be on the same page as Rory? If this has to depend on his own mood about it, then that's a lame reason for not even making it clear to Rory that from his perspective, they are likely broken up.

Even if you were to strictly think that Logan didn't cheat, his entire handling of the bridesmaids situation at the wedding with Rory was awful. Firstly, he doesn't even try to warn Rory in any way that he was involved with the bridesmaids. He could've easily lied to her and said that they were involved prior to him getting together with her. But instead he just says nothing and lets her have to handle the humiliation of finding out that her boyfriend slept with several of his sister's friends when they were apart. When Rory asks him about it, he states that he deliberately didn't tell her because he knew she would be mad about it. This just tells me that Logan knows there's faults in his "break up" excuse to Rory, but still clings to his side of the story and doesn't even take the time to consider her perspective. Even after the wedding, he corners Rory until she has to begrudgingly accept his side of the story, and even when it's clear that she's still mad, he behaves like a victim who "hasn't been forgiven", as if he even asked Rory for her forgiveness or apologized for how he handled the bridesmaids situation.

The series itself doesn't even resolve this issue because Logan conveniently has an accident that prompts Rory to feel guilty for being rightfully mad at him, and this entire issue isn't even brought up because of her own internalized guilt. That's how poorly this whole thing is handled within the writing. If your character has to almost die in order to be absolved of his mishandling, that's not a good resolution. It's a cheap way to make him seem completely innocent at the end because "look! He almost died! Let us now have his girlfriend feel sorry for his awful state."

I'm not even touching the topic of the revival because in that, Logan is very much the obvious cheater. We're never presented with any excuse that he and his fiancee have a "strictly business engagement" going on, the most Logan alludes to is it being "within the dynastic plan". But this doesn't explain why Odette would go to live at his place if they a) had an open relationship agreement, or b) were strictly marrying for their families. Again, Logan presents neither excuse to Rory. You can headcanon any excuse you like, but that doesn't mean it's canon.

[anxiouspotatorants]

I agree with you and @stellaluna33 's tags on Mitchum. Even if you think that Rory wasn't cut out to be a journalist, his criticism was crap. He gave her no such constructive criticism, he didn't even have any reference to make that constructive criticism on except that she didn't speak up during a meeting at which she wasn't even a direct member of but just an intern at. She's here to observe and learn, not act like a regular paid worker when she doesn't even have the status of one. And his condescending suggestions make his criticism look even worse and blatantly show how to him, this type of thing is just a power move on his side because she's a young, inexperienced intern and he's a big CEO of a company. Like firstly, why are his only suggestions stuff like assistant/secretary? Is that truly the only thing she can do as a woman in the professional writing field? Rory doesn't even have to do creative writing solely, she could easily be a content writer/editor for any company that is in need of one. His suggestions border on subtly misogynistic given how Mitchum is because he takes one look at Rory and is all "meh, she can do for a secretary". And the whole "well he was right about her" again, make no sense and aren't true because he actually wasn't. Rory DID get her work published in journalism, she's worked as one for 10 years by the time AYITL takes place, she's just stagnated and lost the will to be in the business anymore. And that's perfectly fine? People switch careers all the time, just because Rory doesn't want to be a journalist anymore doesn't mean she can't still be a writer or have anything to do with the field. And she doesn't have to be a journalist till she dies in order to disprove Mitchum's point. Even with how tough the industry got later on, Rory was still a journalist for a period of time.

I know I'm getting repetetive with my initial reactions to your asks but yes!!! This!!!

Like I do still stand by my opinion that Rory's best future job isn't 24-hour news cycle type journalism (she's a wordy girl who reads doorstoppers and churns out essays like nothing and those types of news demand dry, short and to the point writing), but that doesn't mean I don't think she's fit for any journalistic writing. I mean the fact that her debut in AYITL is going to be a biography proves to me that she's a non-fiction writer moreso than a fiction-writer. She could do longer exposés, content writing like you said, non-fiction books about anything she wants from coffee around the globe to Stars Hollow history to the war of her choosing. Rory is very clearly some kind of writer and that kind is very close to if not directly journalism. In my head she either ends up being an editor for a not-so-giant but incredibly respectable paper or she writes non-fiction and freelances one-off articles and short commissioned pieces between books. But to get there she will need years of experience in the journalism business, which she canonically gets and is suited for.

I might be clouded by anger, but I think Mitchum is being downright misogynist in his review. The fact that he could be doing this all to mold her into the wife his family might accept for Logan is twisted enough on its own, but add his "you should speak up more" argument and the "you'd make a great secretary" and especially that damn vague "you don't have it"? Like does he mean that what she doesn't have is a dick, metaphorical or physical? All these arguments are textbook of sexist people with authority who don't think women are suitable to lead, and Rory's not even looking for a boss-like position! He's just the proverbial boys' club boss if you ask me, hiring only guys who are similar enough to him that he thinks they can do the job but not so similar they become a threat.

[d-c-it]

I rather forget- 7

Intro, One, Patton, Logan, Roman 1, Roman 2, Virgil, Dark

Summary: It always starts with a kiss and goes downhill from there, doens't it.

Ships: platonic DRLAMP, romantic Roceit, platonic anxceit, platonic intrulogical

Warnings: sympathetic Deceit, Remus being a trash man, mentions of blood, a lot of innuendos and curses, panic attacks, you know, the usual.

Not beta-ed we die like man.

A/N: Ha…hahaha… heyyyy. Not sure anyone is still interested in this. But I decided to finish it for the sake of my sanity. I found It on my drive and re-read it and… kinnnda tried to remember where I was going with it.

Kindly reminder this story is set just after Remus was introduced. Gonna proof read the other chapters and edit them on ao3, not here tho. Too annoying. Still going to post them here. Gonna tag the ppl that asked to be tagged. If you don’t want to be tagged anymore pls lemme know.

.

“Roman!”

When the creative side opened his eyes, the first thing he did was kiss Deceit.

There were plenty of things wrong with that decision though. Firstly, he had thought he put those urges behind him. Secondly, surely, surely he didn’t feel that way about the lying side anymore. Thirdly, even if the first and second statements were untrue, it wouldn't matter, because the Deceit he was trying to kiss was a memory… right? He would pass straight (gay?) through him, right? RIGHT? So why were the lips on his so warm and soft…and…?

“Ouch!” he said, as he covered his now bitten lips with his hand. “What the hell?” he glared at Deceit. 

Oh god.

“I should be asking that!” hissed the snake side, Roman felt a little smug at the subtle blush on his cheeks. “You’re ice cold! What are you, especifically you, doing here?” The hold on his arms was bruising hard, Deceit helped him up, one hand on his waist as the yellow side realized Roman could barely stand.

“We were trying to find… what were we…?” Roman could barely think. Deceit was basically carrying him through the halls that now looked more like a maze.

“We? What is this we? The others are also here?” he was glaring, Roman was getting glared at. What a pair of pretty eyes… “Focus, Roman.” 

Roman frowned, trying to remember what exactly he was doing just a minute ago. Wasn't he on a date? What was Dee panicking about? Weren’t they having a good time? Another one of Deceit’s hands was brought to his face, caressing his cheek. Roman melted under it, closing his eyes and getting ready to be kissed.

“Roman!” Deceit hissed instead.

The prince opened his eyes wide, in a moment of clarity he freed himself from Deceit’s grasp. He looked around frantically. Where the heck was Virgil? 

“Anxiety brought you here?”

“No!” Roman finally stood up, realizing he had spoken aloud, but just as he found his balance the place rumbled. Deceit’s face turned pale as both of them stumbled.

“Thomas is here.” Roman turned to look at him so fast he almost got whiplash.

“How…?” 

“Come on. We need to get you out of here and Thomas.” Roman could only mutter a quiet ‘but Virgil…’ as Deceit dragged him around. “Shit.” He stopped and turned, following an unknown path for Roman. “He must be close… Let’s go, my prince.”

Blame it on the state the subconscious had him in. Blame it on his cold limbs or the confusing state of his mind. But Roman may have swooned at that.

.

“I don’t think this idea is worth us all dying.”

“We are not dying, Thomas, you silly goose.” laughed Patton, as they dodged the gray frames that had catched up to them. “...Right, Lo?”

“Indeed.” answered the logical side, looking a bit out of breath. “We are… after all…figments…”

“Of my imagination, right. Well, I am very real!” screamed Thomas, as one wave of frames almost touched him turning a corner. 

He screamed again when, having successfully made it to the new hallway, he came face to face with Remus. Thomas didn’t know who’s screech was louder, his, Remus’s or the others, but as he fell to the floor he watched the Duke smash down the closest frames with his morning star. Patton grabbed his hand, Remy holding his other one as they turned to keep running. He saw Remus grabbing Logan by the back of his shirt pulling him back to start running too. He would have laughed at the funny image, but there were more worrisome things going at the moment.

“You so owe me a blowjob after this, Logi.”

“Not the time, Remus.”

“OH, so there will be a time?”

“Can you horny bitches focus!?” yelled Remy. Thomas thanked him mentally, he didn’t need that image on his mind, perhaps he could put it here? 

Another wall went up between them and the threatening frames, having got some distance thanks to Remus’s intervention. Everyone sighed in relief, running around was starting to tire them up. Well, everyone except Remus.

“So? What’s with this party and why wasn’t I invited? I know some cool party tricks.” he said, balancing his morning star on his nose. Some of the spikes pierced his skin and made him bleed. Thomas suddered, but also realized something.

“You saved us!” he exclaimed. Startling the Duke, making his weapon fall from its balancing position. He looked down at it with a pout, when he looked at Thomas his face was free from scratches. “Why did you save us?” The Duke only shrugged, picking at his nose. Patton scolded him.

“Of course he saved us.” answered Logan instead. Fixing his tie. “ We are all part of you, Thomas. As I have exhaustedly reminded you, we want what's best for you…”

“Hey bitch, can you make me a starbucks? I’m dying here.” Thomas heard Remy say, still processing Logan's words. He saw Remus appear what at first glance did look like a Starbucks coffee, but…

“Eugh, are those dicks?”

“Stardicks coffee, my own brand!”

“And it’s neon green because…?”

“It’s radioactive!”

“...In our own kind of way.”finished Logan, shaking his head. “Why are you here, Remus?”

“I knew Roman was here!” squealed the Duke. “For a while now, thought the kinky bastard was jerking off somewhere near, thought about giving him a scare you know?” he cackled, playing with his mustache. Patton made a face, Thomas frowned at the statement. There was something weird with it. Logan just nodded.

“You were worried about him then.” Remus screeched, making everyone flinch, but didn’t deny the statement. Thomas blinked.

“Oh my god, I completely misjudged you.”

“DON’T LISTEN TO THE NERDY WOLVERINE! HE DOESN’T KNOW WHAT HE’S TALKING ABOUT!”

“I always know what I’m talking about.” defended Logan.

“Infinitesimal.” grinned Remus.

“THAT WAS ONE TIME.”

.

Virgil was pacing. He wasn't panicking. He was living his best life. The floor wasn’t moving on its own and the room was definitely not getting smaller by the second.

He gasped for breath. He couldn’t breathe. If he couldn’t breathe he was going to die. He was dying. Wait, no, he couldn’t die, Logan had said so. Many times in fact. He couldn't die, but he was going to be feeling like this forever because he didn’t need oxygen. He was going to be drowning forever. No. Focus. He had to focus. Logan. Oh god, where was Logan? No, what did Logan say? The five things, five things he could see.

“Blue frames, red frames…” where the hell had Roman go? “Orange frames, green frames, yellow, yellow…” 

He curled up against the wall, sitting on the floor and hugging his legs.

“I can feel the wall, I can feel my clothes, I…” 

Everything started to shake again, making the colorful frames shake where they were hanging until eventually they started falling. He unthinkingly catched one.

It was green.

.

tag list:

@the-strawman

@mochasandwords

@askthesnake

@no-no-no-no-6

@korsaromantic66

@that-one-nb-kid

@scared-ghosthunter

@avocados26

@itsabsurd-and-terrifying

@thewormsheep

@immoral-bitch 

@thenaids

@xachery-apollo

[jungle321jungle]

Slither Into My Heart (Gorgon AU): Part Seven

Deceit didn’t bother to knock as he slammed the door open and glared down to wear Remus sat on his bed polishing his morning star.

“What did you do?” Deceit hissed.

Remus gave him a large smile as he looked him up or down, “Do you have the snakes just up there or are they down below too?”

If asked by Patton later, Deceit most definitely did not try to strangle the other side in that moment. Not all.

Also known as: Deceit is turned into a Gorgon. And the new annoying little snakes on his head seem to have an annoying obsession with Virgil.

Ao3 - Masterlist

Part One

Part Seven

Dee wasn’t sure he had ever moved faster, but just like that he was in his room slamming the door and standing behind it. His initial instinct upon hearing Logan’s words was to throttle the other side- but then he had seen Virgil’s embarrassed- Virgil’s blushing face and he had run- he had sprinted.

His face felt hot, and his heart drumming in his ears was drowning out whatever the hell the snakes were saying. God why the hell had Logan even fucking dared. That wasn't his place! When he got the courage to leave his room he was going to-

“Dee?”

Virgil’s voice may have well been ice in Dee’s veins the way he froze. But he also didn't respond, so a knock sounded at the door. “Dee?” he asked again. “Um, I... um... I yelled at Logan for you. Um, and about um...” He heard as Virgil gave a cough. “If you want to talk then yeah. If not I’ll just go.”

Bad Logan. Nice Vee. Vee not mad! Logan mean. Talk Vee. No talk Vee. Hide. Hide good. Talk good. Talk bad.

He wasn’t sure when he had fallen asleep- he wasn’t even sure he remembered dragging himself on his bed, but he did remember waking up. He was sitting up gasping for air, tears burning in his eyes. He swallowed trying to calm himself down but unable to he forced himself to get up and walk to the kitchen. He ignored the gazes of everyone who watched him pass in favor for filling a cup with water and downing it.

“Everything alright Deceit?” Patton asked slowly.

“Fine,” he breathed out refilling his cup.

“Talking may help, kiddo.”

“I don't-”

Talk. Talk good. Maybe help. No nightmares. Help. Talk.

He gave a sigh and after a pause he turned- taking in the fact that Patton, Logan and Remus (aka not Virgil) were sitting at the table before he joined them.

“Deceit,” Logan coughed awkwardly. “Firstly I’d like to apologize for earlier. It’s come to my attention that I shouldn't have overstepped my bounds.”

Dee shook his head, “I really don't want to talk about that right now.”

“What’s up with the snakes?” Remus asked leaning back in his chair. “Are the little devils refusing to be trained in dance?”

Dee didn’t even want to ask. So instead, he told the truth. “I... I haven’t been sleeping. I’ve been having nightmares about my snakes. I thought I had finally gotten used to them and then the shedding happened, and other things which just make it seem stranger and stranger but also forcing me to realize that I’m who I am now... a gorgon. But um... I can't help but wonder and worry about how far that goes...”

“What do you mean?” Logan pressed.

Dee gave a swallow before he let his eyes fall to the table, “I... I keep have nightmares about accidentally turning you all to stone.”

“That would be pretty sick, not gonna lie.” Dee’s head snapped up to see as Virgil walked in the kitchen. “Sorry, I’m not helping am I?”

“Oh! Maybe Remus can set rules for them,” Patton suggested. “He made the connection for Thomas after all.”

“I don't think so,” Logan mused. “The connection was initially made with him and medusa after all... the connection would need to be made with a different gorgon I assume. But that may threaten the snakes themselves.”

No like rules. Rules bad. Want stay. But stone bad! No stone! No want!

The conversation was continuing around him but his focus was primarily on Virgil. Because Virgil seemed to have been functioning as if yesterday had never happened. And Janus wasn’t entirely sure if that was a good or bad thing.

“Don’t worry Dee!” Patton said loudly while clapping him on the shoulder. “Remus will take care of it.”

Dee paused to look at Remus’ smile before he pushed the hand away and stood, “I don’t know how trusting Remus with anything is supposed to make me feel better. I’m going back to my room.”

~~~~

He slept in short bursts. Falling asleep for five minutes awake for ten, and then asleep for ten and awake for five. It wasn’t anything more than exhausting, but it was how Dee was apparently going to spend the day. He had resigned himself to that. And it seemed the snakes agreed. Their usual buzzing conversations were at a minimum or nonexistent all together. Rather they seemed to be just as exhausted and out of it as he was.

Dee held in a sigh. He wished he could bring them some peace at least. His nightmares were about them turning people to stone after all, there was no way they were in a good place. But he wasn’t sure what to say. Unsure what else to do he reached a hand up to his head and felt as the snakes moved to rub against his hand.

Hand warm. Pets! Want pets. Hand warm. Hand keep.

Dee gave a slight chuckle despite himself, “You can’t keep my hand. If you’re cold just say so.”

Cold. Not cold. Yes cold!

Dee rolled his eyes as he slowly sat up, “Do you guys want me to lay on a blanket or do you want to be in a hat?”

Their answer however wasn’t heard as a soft knock sounded on his door. But when he didn’t respond it came again, this time with Virgil’s voice. “Dee? Can I come in?”

Dee gave a sigh, as if he could say no, but to avoid looking Virgil in the eye he moved to the closet to find an extra blanket. “Sure.”

He heard the door open slowly followed by the sound of unsure footsteps and the door closing.

There! Blanket. Cozy! Warm. Want cozy!

“There’s only one blanket in here I can figure it out without the peanut gallery.”

“Sorry for interrupting,” Virgil said from behind him.

Dee took a deep breath as he grabbed the blanket and turned around. Virgil was standing in his doorway looking around as if he had never been in the room before. But more interestingly he had something behind his back.

“What did you need?” He asked awkwardly as he wrapped the blanket around his head.

“Um... I-I had an idea to help with your nightmares,” Virgil started his gaze now firmly fixed on the floor. “But it’s a bit childish.”

“What do you mean?”

Virgil gave an awkward swallow before he pulled something from behind his back and held it out. But quite frankly Dee had no clue what it was. It seemed to be a large hamster pillow with a long nose like an elephant.

“It’s a baku,” Virgil explained. “Its um a Japanese mythological creature that’s supposed to eat bad dreams. I um, I’ve had it for a long time and maybe it sounds childish and cheesy but um... if there’s a small chance it could help? And if it doesn’t if it helps we are part of Thomas so I don’t think you can turn us to stone. But I guess there’s still a chance- but I’m not scared um... just- just take the baku if you want. Not that you have to of course.”

Dee paused before he took the pillow, “Thank...thank you.”

Virgil gave a sharp nod as he turned away. “When you’re feeling better I, I wanted to talk to you about something else so um. Good night.”

“Night.”

As Virgil left Dee laid down and held the pillow in hands as he examined it. As he did so he couldn’t exactly stop the slight blush on his cheeks.

~~~~

“Dee! You’re not dead!”

“Obviously I’m not dead.”

“It’s been almost two days!” Patton protested squeezing him tighter.

“I was sleeping,” Dee told him, pushing him away. “And now I’m hungry.”

“You slept well then?” Virgil asked.

“Yeah... thanks.”

Thank Vee! Yay vee! No bad sleep!

“No problem.”

Dee made himself a plate and sat down at the table, “So um... you wanted to talk about something?”

Virgil gave a nod, “Yeah. Um... firstly, Patton can you uh?”

Patton cocked his head slightly in confusion before he seemed to understand and nodded quickly, “Oh uh I’ll be right back! I just remembered I have to... to uh... uh... make the bed!”

When he had left Virgil gave a soft sigh, “So um, about the other day. And what Logan said...”

Oh no. Oh no. Oh no!

Dee felt his face heat up and he was standing before he knew he was, “We can just pretend that never happened! Let’s just go back to normal, okay?”

Virgil’s head fell so his face couldn’t be seen. “But I... I don’t want to.”

“W-what?”

Virgil’s head lifted up slightly and Dee’s heart skipped a beat at the blush on the other side’s face. “I... Shit you’re really gonna make me say it? I... I like you Dee...”

For one of the first times in his existence, Dee was speechless. Truly speechless. Even the snakes were silent.

Virgil was giving him a slight glare, “Say something!”

“When’s the wedding?” Roman called from the next room.

“Fuck off!” Dee and Virgil yelled back as one.

As Roman cackled Dee sunk back into his seat and looked across from him at Virgil. “I like you too.”

Virgil gave a slight laugh, “Yeah I already figured that out.”

“Right...”

A weight fell from his shoulders, and Dee couldn’t help but give a sigh of relief.

Yes. Yes. Vee! Vee like! Vee like!

Yeah... Virgil liked him. It didn’t really make sense that Virgil did, but Dee wouldn’t exactly complain. “I don’t really know what happens now,” he admitted.

Virgil gave a shrug, “Me neither.”

Before Dee could respond, Roman walked in the room his eyes sparkling, “If you guys are looking for date ideas then I have a whole list that we can test before we send Thomas on one.”

“We just-”

“It’s in my room I’ll be right back!”

Ooo. Date! Need fancy clothes. Dates fun? Yes, fun! Spend time with Vee!

Dee rolled his eyes, “Want to move into the living room? I feel like this is gonna take awhile.”

“Or, we could always just go elsewhere before he comes back.”

“Anywhere in mind?”

“I found it!” Roman’s voice called.

“Does it matter?” Virgil asked heading into the hall.

Dee didn’t answer, rather he grabbed Virgil’s hand and reveled in Virgil’s blush as he let himself be pulled down the hall to who knows where. Because it didn’t matter where they were going, because if Virgil was going to he knew he'd be happy.

~~The End~~

Thanks for sticking around!

[yourwakingnightmares]

Scott Summers Character Study

Okay, does anyone else have those characters that they don’t follow full-time, but they always come back to? Kind of like that old sweatshirt you keep: sure, you have new ones, and they’re great, but that old one is just comfortable, and perfect.

Scott Summers has always been that character for me; like, sometimes I might go months, or years without writing, or looking up anything Scott Summers related... Then something happens, and boom. There it goes, I’m on a roll again. And so... Here we are with my rant of the day.

Buckle in folks, this is gonna be a long one.

I think a lot of people have dismissed Scott as a character, saying that he’s ‘flat’, or ‘one-dimensional’. And if you only periodically glance at comics, or peruse through the movies, I can see how you’d come to that conclusion.

Because unlike Logan (who I do enjoy, this isn’t an anti-Logan post), whose story is easy to follow, easy to understand, Scott’s story is nuanced; it’s something developed over time, with small hints and glimpses thrown in.

For example... what we find out is that Scott is the way he is, because Xavier made him that way. Xavier needed a leader, but he was stuck with Scott: a boy who had lost his parents. A boy who’d suffered from a horrific brain injury. A boy who’d been experimented on, and mind-raped by Nathaniel Essex, also known as Mr. Sinister for Scott’s formative years following his brain injury. A boy who escaped a sadistic telepath, only to end up in the hands of an abusive criminal.

So what does Xavier do? Well, he smooths out those edges; he puts subtle compulsions to turn Scott into the leader he needs him to be. He takes the edge off of the worst memories, and turns them into something distant; something that Scott can look at like a movie starring someone else as the traumatized kid.

Now, don’t misunderstand me: Scott was a brilliant leader. He had the tactical ability, the logistical knowledge to be a leader, even without Xavier. Which is what makes what Xavier did that much worse.

Because what that means is that Scott could’ve gotten there on his own; he could’ve been that leader without Xavier screwing with his head.

Xavier took a kid who needed a home, who needed stability, who needed therapy, and said, “Aha! I know a quicker route! Screw that other stuff; that’ll take years to be effectual! I’ll just do a bit of mental landscaping, and wall off the emotions he felt; I’ll just take the edge off those memories! Surely, nothing can go wrong!”

Looking at Scott’s relationship with Jean from this perspective also sheds new light on it: Scott’s mind had been violated by three telepaths, all of whom had only their own goals in mind. Mr. Sinister, Jack Winters, and Charles Xavier all were concerned more with Scott as means to an end, than they were with Scott himself.

Enter Jean Grey. A young girl, who is a freak even by mutant standards. She struggled to keep her telepathy under control, and we’re frequently shown in comics, books, and even the movies, that she picked up stray thoughts from almost everyone, leading to some very embarrassing moments for everyone. She was an outcast among outcasts.

Not to Scott though. When everyone else is worried about keeping their thoughts locked up tight around Jean, when everyone else is avoiding her so she doesn’t accidentally read their minds... Scott embraces her. He falls in love with her.

And I don’t think we truly ever look at why. Because here was a kid who had every justifiable reason to hate Jean -he’d spent roughly half his life being a plaything for telepaths, people who plucked out things they didn’t like, or added things they wanted. Out of everyone at the Mansion, Scott truly had the best reason to fear and/or hate Jean; out of all of them, Scott best knows the dangers of having a telepath rooting around in other people’s minds. But he doesn’t. Instead, he falls in love with her.

Why? Don’t misunderstand me, they had things they loved about each other in their relationship, but how did it even begin? Why was Scott so open and accepting about Jean’s fragile control over her telepathy in their teenage years?

Because he’d never had any say in who played in his head to begin with. To him, Jean’s accidental slip-ups were nothing compared to the other telepaths he’d interacted with. While everyone else saw Jean’s powers for what they were (an invasion of their most sacred thoughts, accidental or not), Scott was so screwed in the head that it wouldn’t have crossed his mind to be angry or upset about it.

This isn’t to malign Jean, or her and Scott’s relationship; after all, Jean hadn’t done anything wrong either. But it casts a rather dark shadow over the beginnings of their relationship.

But why does Scott become so enamored with Jean? To the point where, after her death, he marries a woman who -although he doesn’t know it -is quite literally a clone of her?

Because Jean was the first telepath who didn’t screw with his head; probably the only person who truly knew what was going on in Scott’s head, and didn’t run screaming. Although he would later meet another, for many years, Jean was the only telepath Scott had had in his mind who didn’t remake his mental landscape.

And think about it: how many people would’ve been comfortable having a lover who literally knew what you were thinking, 24/7? That’s not being mean, that’s just pragmatism: we rarely share our innermost thoughts with anyone, and yet we see that Jean was as comfortable in Scott’s head as she was her own.

We see that Jean’s death devastated Scott; for the first time, he went against his programming. For the first time, we start to catch glimpses of Scott beyond what Sinister, Winters, and Xavier created.

Now, what Scott did to Madelyne was wrong; there’s no two ways around it. However, what can we learn from this, when viewed in context with everything else?

Following Jean’s death, Scott acted like a man who’d lost a piece of himself. He starts searching for his past (finding his grandparents in Alaska), where he meets a woman who is practically the physical twin of his soulmate. Within months, Scott proposes, and they get married, eventually having a son (and we won’t even get into the fact that Scott allows Madelyne to name his son after a man who nearly broke him).

As an adult, these actions can only be looked at as selfish, and reprehensible. But what if we look at it through a different lens for a moment.

These actions would be considered ‘normal’ by teenagers, and young adults; hell, most of us went to school with couples whose story emulated Scott and Madelyne’s. Scott’s first and only girlfriend dies tragically, and he decides to try and learn more about his past -for the first time since his parents died. He meets a girl, rebounds hard, and gets married quickly, only to realize what most adults already know: rebounds never work, and never last. Looking at Madelyne was a benefit at the start, but as time went on, it became a knife in his chest: she was the physical twin of Jean, after all, but she wasn’t really Jean -in fact, Madelyne and Jean had very little in common beyond the physical.

Any healthy adult would have understood this; that physically looking like someone doesn’t mean two people are the same. While this doesn’t excuse Scott’s treatment of Madelyne, it at least gives us a reason. He’s acting out, searching for his origins, and falling in love with a girl who looks like the only person who loved him for who he was. Just like a teenage boy would do.

Now, again: this behavior is unacceptable. As a society, we teach boys this, and they learn through experience. It’s a life lesson -however, it’s one that Scott never got to learn. Scott never got to be a teenage boy; he never got the chance to learn, because Xavier had turned him into his perfect little soldier who never questioned him from such a young age (and prior to that, his only consistent interactions were with the men who abused him, mentally and physically).

Later, we see Scott with Emma Frost -a woman most consider to be a villain, a woman who had fought against the X-Men before. Why?

Well, firstly, let’s consider the implications that Scott chooses another relationship with a female telepath. Sure, with Jean, we explained why they ended up together, but by the time Scott meets Emma, he’s older; he’s more experienced. Why does he put himself in a relationship with someone with the same telepathic abilities as the men who nearly destroyed his very sense of self as a child?

We have to remember that, at first, Emma simply offers to telepathically counsel Scott; to try and piece together the shattered void of his mental landscape. Meaning that Emma was the first person at that point to see the emerging Scott Summers -Jean knew the Scott that had been created, manipulated, and ordered around by Xavier, but following Jean’s death, we start to see glimpses of the real Scott. And Emma is the first telepath to get to see inside Scott’s head, as he starts to throw off the remnants of what Xavier had turned him into.

And she starts to fall in love with him. Unlike with Jean, there are no demands or expectations in place; Emma accepts him for who he is. He questions his loyalty to Xavier? Emma’s okay with that. He questions who he actually is? Emma offers to help him find out.

(Please note: this isn’t knocking Jean; she was as much a victim of Xavier as Scott was, in her own way).

But for the first time, we see Scott Summers start to come into his own; we see him making decisions, expressing opinions, expressing wants and desires outside of life as an X-man. We see him show doubt of Xavier, we see him struggling with who he actually is, and who he was made into.

And Emma... Emma just accepts it. She accepts Scott for who he is, with no agenda, no pressure, not expectations.

Moving a head a bit, let’s look at the action that turned Scott into one of the most reviled comic characters: his killing of Charles Xavier, while under the control of the Phoenix Force.

Now, you can look here for my opinions on Xavier, and why I think we should’ve all been celebrating his death. But let’s look at this for a moment.

Most people’s reactions to this were ‘Xavier raised Scott! Scott was like his son! Scott was one of his first students! How could he?!’

I think the better question, when we look at all the events in Scott’s life is... how did he refrain that long? Xavier’s betrayal of him was so much worse than Sinister’s or Winters’ because Xavier did it as a friend. As a parental figure. Sinister just rewrote, erased, or destroyed things in Scott’s head as he pleased, simply for kicks. Winters’ used his -admittedly limited -telepathic abilities to force Scott to help him steal.

But Xavier saved him from that, right? Xavier gave him a safe place to stay. A place with no more experiments, no more mind-control, no more pain. He earned Scott’s trust, gave him a home, a life, and a purpose.

Only... he didn’t. Xavier betrayed Scott, in a way that Sinister and Winters couldn’t have done. Because Scott didn’t trust them. He trusted Xavier, and Xavier fucked with his head just as badly as Sinister had done. Whereas Sinister and Winters had taken a sledgehammer to Scott’s mental landscape... Xavier just chiseled away at it until it became something he wanted. 

I’m going to end this here, because really, there wasn’t much of a point to this post, other than to detail out a lot of thoughts that have been kicking around for a while. If you agree, or disagree, I’d love to hear it. 

[lucyreviewcy]

The Three Three Musketeers (or Where The F*ck Did All The Stupid Hats Go)

I read The Three Musketeers and then I watched the 1973, 1993 and 2011 adaptations. Which one wins tho?

Adaptation is a fascinating concept, especially of texts which are frequently adapted or parodied. After I rewatched the 2005 Pride and Prejudice I was reminded how weirdly divisive the two dominant adaptations of that book are. A lot of people consider the 2005 to be an inferior betrayal of the 1990s BBC version. I actually prefer the 2005 because I think Matthew McFadyen’s Mr Darcy is a wonderfully complex character. McFadyen imbues Darcy with social awkwardness and anxiety, which Lizzie misinterprets as his pride. To overcome the “Lizzie doesn’t fancy him ‘til she sees his house” debate, director Joe Wright includes a moment where Lizzie glimpses Darcy alone with his sister. He’s comfortable, his body language is completely different, and he’s smiling broadly. That moment really sold me on the entire film because it made Darcy a full character and was a really simple addition that rounded out the story. I still like the 90s version but for me, it’s the 2005 that takes first place.  (Although an honourable mention for Pride and Prejudice and Zombies because it is an excellent romp.)

Look: adaptation is always a complicated topic. You can’t untangle one adaptation from another, because it’s pretty rare that somebody adapting a classic text like Pride and Prejudice or The Three Musketeers is not already familiar with existing adaptations. The most recent adaptation of any classic text is not simply an adaptation of that text, but the next step in a flow chart that includes all the previous adaptations and the cultural context of the newly created product. These three adaptations of Dumas’ 1844 novel are all texturally and stylistically very different, and two of them diverge significantly from the original text. What I found truly fascinating was what all of them had in common, and what each new era (these were made at around 20 year intervals) decides to add or remove. What do all these movies agree are the essential parts of the story, and what are some adaptations more squeamish about including from Dumas’ original narrative?

Before we dive in, no I have not seen every single adaptation of the story, that would be a dissertation level of research and I do actually have things to do right now (although, I will admit...not many.) I’m looking at these three Hollywood adaptations because they all had star studded casts (for the era they were made in), they’re all English language, and (crucially) they were all easily available on the internet for me to stream.

What are the essential ingredients of a Three Musketeers adaptation?

Firstly, there should be at least three musketeers. Secondly, D’Artagnan (Michael York 1973, Chris O’Donnell 1993, Logan Lerman 2011) should be a young upstart who is introduced part way through a sword fight. He should also have silly hair. He is also consistently introduced to the musketeers in all three films by challenging them each individually to duels at noon, one o’clock and two o’clock. 

The films all maintained some elements of the original “Queen’s Diamonds” storyline, and featured the Queen, Milady and Constance. The characterisation of these three varied a lot.

Our villains in each case are invariably the Cardinal, his pal Rochefort (who always has an eyepatch, although this trope is not in the book and is actually attributable to the way Christopher Lee is styled in the 1973 film), and Milady de Winter. Satisfyingly, at least two of the villains usually wear red because they’re bad. Red is for bad. 

All three are very swashbuckling in tone, have elements of physical comedy, and two of them include one of the three valet characters Dumas wrote into the original story, Planchet (1973 Roy Kinnear, 2011 James “ugh why” Corden). They also all bear the generic markings of the movies made during the same era, our 70s D’Artagnan feels like a prototype Luke Skywalker. The 90s version features a random martial arts performer. The 2011 version has CGI and James Corden in equal measure (read: far too much of both.)

What are the big differences?

I’m going to divide this category into three main segments: character, story and style. My own three musketeers, the three musketeers of movie making.

Character

D’Artagnan

D’artagnan in the book comes across as a pretty comical figure. He’s nineteen and there’s something satisfying about how similar Dumas’ caricature of a nineteen year old is to a modern character of the same age. He’s overconfident, has a simplistic but concrete set of morals, and falls in love with every woman he sees. If D’Artagnan were a 2021 character, he’d really hate The Last Jedi, is what I’m saying. He’d definitely have a tumblr blog, probably a lot like this one, but perhaps a scooch more earnest. He really loved The Lighthouse but he can’t explain why. Isn’t it nice to know that awkward nineteen year olds have been pretty much the same for the last three hundred years at least? 

In all three films he’s kind of irritating, but at least in the 1973 this feels deliberate. This version has a certain “Carry On Musketeering” quality to it and D’Artagnan is your pantomime principal, he’s extremely naïve and he takes himself very seriously. This is the closest D’Artagnan to the book, and the 1973 is, in general, the film which adheres most faithfully to that source material. 

The 1993, which is (spoiler alert) my least favourite adaptation, has Chris O’Donnell as the least likeable D’Artagnan I’ve come across. I’ve only seen O’Donnell in one other thing, the Al Pacino movie Scent of a Woman. He’s bearable in that because he’s opposite Al Pacino, and so his wide-eyed innocence makes sense as a contrast to Pacino’s aged hoo-ah cynicism. Rather than being introduced in a practice sword fight with his father, as in the other two films, D’Artagnan is fighting the brother of an ex-lover. This captures the problem with the film in general: this adaptation wants D’Artagnan to be cool. He is not. The comedy of the 1973, and indeed the book, comes from D’Artagnan being deeply uncool, and from his blind idolisation of the deeply flawed Musketeers who actually are cool, but not necessarily heroic, or even good people. Their moral greyness contrasts with D’Artagnan’s defined sense of right and wrong, but he still considers them to be role models and heroes. 

2011′s version also suffers from “Cool D’Artagnan” syndrome, with the added annoyance of that most Marvel of tropes: the quip. One of the real issues with this film is that the dialogue has a lot of forced quippery that doesn’t quite land, and the editing slows the pace of the entire film. D’Artagnan’s first interaction with Constance is a bad attempt at wit which Constance points out isn’t very funny. The problem is that Constance has no personality so there’s no real indication that she’s in any position to judge his level of wit. She’s just vague, blonde and there: three characteristics which describe an entire pantheon of badly written female characters throughout the ages. Cool D’Artagnan also means that Constance should be additionally cool, because in the book, Constance is older than, smarter than and over-all more in charge than D’Artagnan. 

Female Characters

Let’s go into this with an open mind that understands all these films were made in the sociological context of their decade. The 1973 version would absolutely not be made in the same way now. Constance is a clumsy cartoon character who is forever falling over and accidentally sticking her breasts out. This is not the character from the books, but does at least leave an impression on the viewer one way or another. 

In contrast, the 1993 has a Constance so forgettable I literally cannot picture her. I think she holds D’Artagnan’s hand at the end. That’s all I can say on the subject. 

The 2011 has Gabriella Wilde in the role, and absolutely wastes her. Anyone who’s seen her in  Poldark knows that she can do sharp-tongued beautiful wit-princess with ease. It’s the writing of this film that lets her down, in general, that’s the problem with it. The storyline and design are great, but the actual dialogue lacks the pace and bite that a quip-ridden star vehicle needs. This Constance is given simultaneously more and less to do than the Constance of the original book, who demonstrates at every turn the superiority of her intellect over D’Artagnan, but doesn’t get to pretend to be a Musketeer and whip her hat off to show her flowing golden hair like she does in the 2011. 

The best character, for my money, in The Three Musketeers is Milady de Winter. Even Dumas got so obsessed with her that there are full chapters of the book written from pretty much her perspective. In the book, she’s described as a terrifying genius with powers of persuasion so potent that any jailor she speaks to must be instantly replaced. My favourite Milady is absolutely Faye Dunaway from 1973. She’s ferocious and beautiful and ruthless, but potentially looks even better because the portrayals in the other films are so very bad. 

The 1993 version has your typical blonde 90s baddie woman (Rebecca De Mornay), she wouldn’t look out of place as a scary girlfriend in an episode of Friends or Frasier. 2011 boasts Milla Jovovich who presents us a much more physical version of the character, even doing an awkwardly shoe-horned anachronistic hall of lasers a la Entrapment except instead of lasers its really thin pieces of glass? The “yeah but it looks cool” attitude to anachronism in this film is what makes it fun, and Jovovich’s Milady isn’t awful, she’s just let down by a plot point that she shares with 1993 Milady. Both these adaptations get really hooked on the fact that Athos used to be married to Milady at one time (conveniently leaving out the less justifiable character point that Athos TRIED TO HANG HER when he found out she had been branded as a thief - doesn’t wash so well with the modern audiences, I think.) Rather than hating/fearing Milady, the two modern adaptations suggest that Athos is still in love with her and pines for her. This detracts from Athos’ character just as much as it detracts from Milady’s. Interestingly, and I don’t know where this came from (if it was in the book I definitely missed it), both films feature a confrontation between the two where Athos points a gun at Milady but she pre-empts him by throwing herself off a cliff (or in the 2011, an air-ship.) I think both these versions were concerned that Milady was an anti-feminist character because she’s so wantonly evil, but I disagree. Equality means it is absolutely possible for Milady to be thoroughly evil and hated by the musketeers just as much as they hate Rochefort and the Cardinal. If you want to sort out the gender issues with this story, round Constance out and give her proper dialogue, don’t make Milady go weak at the knees because of whiny Athos (both Athos characters are exceedingly whiny, 1973 Athos is just...mashed).

The Musketeers

These guys are pretty important to get right in a film called The Three Musketeers. They have to be flawed, funny but kind of cool. Richard Chamberlain is an absolute dish in the 1973 version, capturing all those qualities in one. Is it clear which version is my favourite yet?

Athos is played variously by a totally hammered Oliver Reed (1973), a ginger-bearded Kiefer Sutherland (1993) and a badly bewigged Matthew McFadyen (2011). They all have in common the role of being the most level-headed character, but the focus on the relationship between Athos and Milady in the 93 and 11 editions undermines this a lot. Athos should be cool and aloof, instead of mooning over Milady the entire time. The 2011 gives Athos some painfully “edgy” lines like “I believe in this (points at wine) this (flicks coin) and this (stabs coin with knife.)...” which McFadyen ( once oh so perfect as Mr Darcy) doesn’t quite pull off. 

Porthos seems to be the musketeer who is the most different between interpretations. A foppish dandy in the 1973, a pirate (!?!) in the 1993, and then just...large in 2011. I think the mistake made in the 2011 is that large alone does not a personality make. There are hints at Porthos’ characterisation from the book: his dependence on rich women for money and his love of fine clothing, but these are only included as part of his introduction and never crop up again through the rest of the film. Pirate Porthos in 1993 is... you know what, fine, you guys were clearly throwing everything at the wall and seeing what stuck. 

Aramis is our dishy Richard Chamberlain in 1973, followed by womanising Charlie Sheen in 1993 and then strikingly suave Luke Evans in 2011. I actually didn’t mind Luke Evans’ interpretation, his dialogue is forgettable but his sleek charm stuck in my head. For some reason, this version has Aramis working as a parking attendant for horses, it worked for me as a fun A Knight’s Tale-esque bit of anachronistic character development. Charlie Sheen has never managed to appear likable or attractive to me and so his role in the 1993 falls flat. In fact, in that edition there’s not much distinction between the musketeers as characters and they’re all just very 90s and American. As anyone who’s read this blog before will expect, I think Keanu Reeves as Aramis would have really upped this film’s game. In fact, Keanu Reeves as Aramis, Brad Pitt as Athos and Will Smith as Porthos could have been the ultimate 90s adaptation, throw in DiCaprio as D’Artagnan and Roger Allam as the Cardinal and I’m fully sold. 

The King and Queen

All three films try and do the “Queen’s Diamonds” storyline, but only the 1973 actually includes the Queen’s affair with Buckingham. The queen, played by Geraldine Chaplin, is a tragic romantic figure (she doesn’t have a tonne to do besides being wistful and sighing over Lord Buckingham). The king is played as a frivolous idiot by Jean-Pierre Cassel (voice dubbed by Richard Briers). He doesn’t really think of the queen as a person, more as a possession that he doesn’t want Buckingham to have. 

In the 1993 version, Buckingham doesn’t really feature, and it’s the queen’s refusal to get off with the Cardinal that prompts his fury at her. The book does touch on the Cardinal’s desire for the queen, but it’s placed front and centre in 1993. This is definitely the boobsiest version, with quite a lot of corsetry on show and a cardinal who hits on literally all the women. The king is shown as a stroppy teenage boy under the thumb of the cardinal, who just wants to ask the queen to the dance but doesn’t have the nerve. The king is, essentially, a Fall Out Boy lyric. 

The 2011 also seems to be really squeamish about the idea of the queen having an extramarital affair. It paints Buckingham (played with excellent wig and aplomb by Orlando Bloom) as a stylish villain, who’s advances the queen has rejected. Like the 1993 version, the King is a feckless youth rendered speechless by the presence of his wife. Both these versions want the King and Queen to be happy together, while the 1973 doesn’t give a fuck. 

The Cardinal and his Cronies

The cardinal is kind of universally an evil creepy guy. One of the characters from the 1973 version who actually left the least impression on me, played by Charlton Heston. I think he’s overshadowed in my recollection by cartoonishly evil Christopher Lee as Rochefort. Lee’s Rochefort is dark, mysterious and wonderfully bad, and so influential that all other incarnations’ design is based on him. The 1993 version had truly over the top Michael Wincott as a character I could honestly refer to as Darth Rochefort from the way he’s framed, while 2011 boasts a chronically underused Mads Mikkelsen in the role. 

Cardinal-wise, 1993 was my favourite with Tim Curry in all his ecclesiastical splendour. It was disappointing that everything about this film, including the Cardinal’s sexual harassment of every single female character, really didn’t work for me. Tim Curry is a natural choice for this role and gives it his campy all. 

2011 has not one but two trendy bond villain actors, with Mikkelsen working alongside Christoph Waltz who was...just kind of fine. I was really excited when he appeared but he didn’t really push the character far enough and left me cold. 

Story

The story is where the different adaptations diverge most completely. 1973 follows the plot of the novel, D’Artagnan comes to Paris, befriends the Musketeers and becomes embroiled in a plot by the Cardinal to expose the Queen’s affair with Buckingham through the theft of two diamond studs. D’Artagnan, aided partially by the musketeers, must travel to London to retrieve the set of twelve studs gifted by the King to the Queen, and by the Queen to Buckingham. He does so, the plot is foiled, he’s made into a musketeer! Hurrah, tankards all round.

The 1993 version drops D’Artagnan into the story just as the Cardinal has disbanded the Musketeers. I found the plot of this one really hard to follow and I think at some point D’Artagnan ended up in the Bastille? There was this whole plot point about how Rochefort had killed D’Artagnan’s father. In the original, and in the 1973 version, D’Artagnan’s entire beef with Rochefort is rooted in a joke Rochefort makes about D’Artagnan’s horse. I guess for the producers of this one, a horse insult is not enough motivation for a lifelong grudge. That is really the problem with the entire film, it forgets that the story as told by Dumas is set in a world where men duel over such petty things as “criticising one’s horse”, “blocking one’s journey down a staircase” and “accusing one of having dropped a lady’s handkerchief.” The colour palette and styling are very 90s “fun fun fun”, but the portrayal of the cardinal and the endless angst about D’Artagnan’s father really dampen the mood. 

The 2011 version, this is where the shit really hits the fan. We meet our musketeers as they collaborate with Milady to steal the blueprints for a flying ship (it’s like a piratecore zeppelin). Milady betrays them and gives the plans to Buckingham, they all become jaded and unemployed. D’Artagnan arrives on the scene (his American accent explained by the fact that he’s from a different part of France) and befriends the Musketeers. The cardinal tries to frame the queen for infidelity by having Milady steal her diamonds to hide them in Buckingham’s safe at the tower of London. Something something Constance, something something help me D’Artagnan you’re my only hope. MASSIVE AIRSHIP BATTLE. The king and queen have a dance. James Corden cracks wise. 

It seems like as time has passed, producers, writers and directors have felt compelled to embellish the story. I think, specifically in the case of the two later versions, this is because they wanted the films to resemble the big successes of the period. Everybody knows no Disney hero can be in possession of both parents, so D’Artagnan is out to avenge his father like Simba or Luke Skywalker. In the 2011 version, the plot is overblown and overcomplicated in what seems like an attempt to replicate the success of both the Sherlock Holmes and Pirates of the Caribbean franchises. Remember the plot of Pirates of the Caribbean: At World’s End? No, me neither. 

Style

The style of these films grows increasingly wild along with the plots as time passes. The 1973 features a lot of slapstick comedy, some of which really made me cackle, and some of which was cringeworthily sexist (Constance’s boobs through the window of a litter.) That’s the 70s though! I love The Godfather but Diane Keaton’s character is unbelivably dull and annoying. Star Wars features a pretty good female character but she does end up in that bikini. The 70s seems to be a time of movies that were great except for their occasional headlong dive into misogyny. That doesn’t mean the entire movie is bad, it just means it’s suffering from the consequences of being made in the 70s. There were other consequences of this, I doubt many modern productions could get away with physically injuring so many of it’s cast members. From a glance down the IMDB trivia page, this film yielded a higher casualties to cast ratio than the My Chemical Romance Famous Last Words music video, and that’s a hard figure to top. 

The 1993 version is a Disney feature and suffers from having a thin sheen (not Charlie in this instance) of “Disney Original Movie” pasted over every scene. It looks like The Parent Trap might be filming in the adjacent studio a lot of the time. The vibrancy of the colours makes the costumes look unrealistic, while the blandness of the female characters means this movie ends up a bit of a bland bro-fest. Also occasionally the sexual and violent moments really jar with the overall tone making it an uneven watch. One minute it’s Charlie Sheen cracking jokes about trying to get off with someone’s wife, the next minute you see Milady throw herself off a cliff and land on the rocks. Weird choices all round. 

The 2011 version, as I’ve already mentioned, was trying to borrow its style from the success of Sherlock Holmes and Pirates of the Caribbean, with a little Ocean’s 11 thrown in. The soundtrack flips between not quite a Hans Zimmer score and not quite that other Hans Zimmer score, and after the success of Stardust it ends with a Take That song (for it to match up to the story it should have been Take That feat. Harry styles imho). Visually, there’s some fantastic travel by mapping going on, there’s far too much CGI (one of my friends pointed out that the canal in Venice seemed to be full of Flubber). Everyone is dressed in black leather, and there are not enough big hats at all. One of the best things about Musketeers films is that they’re an excuse for ridiculous hats, and in a film with a quite frankly insane visual style, I’m surprised the hats didn’t make it through. The cast, unfortunately, really lack chemistry which means the humorous dialogue is either stilted or James Corden, and the editing is just very strange. It’s one of those films that feels about as disjointed as an early morning dream, the one where you dream you’ve woken up, gotten dressed and fed the cat, but you actually are still in bed. 

Conclusion

Adaptations focus on different things depending on the context they were created in. The 2005 Pride and Prejudice is deliberately “grittier” than its 1990s predecessor, at a stage when “grit” was everywhere (The Bourne Identity, Spooks, Constantine). The Musketeers adaptations demonstrate exactly the same thing: what people wanted in the 70s was bawdy comedy and slapstick with a likeable idiot hero, the 90s clearly called for... Charlie Sheen and bright colours, and the 2010s just want too much of everything and a soundtrack with lots of banging and crashing. The more modern adaptations simplified the female characters (although the 1973 version definitely is guilty of oversimplifying Constance) while over-complicating the plot. There’s a lot of embellishment going on in the 2011 version that suggests the film wasn’t very sure of itself, it pulls its plot punches while simultaneously blindly flailing its stylistic fists. 

The film that works the best for me will always be the 1973 because it’s pretty straight down the line. Musketeers are good, Milady is evil, falling over is funny and the King’s an idiot. The later adaptations seem to be trying to fix problems with the story that the 1973 version just lets fly. The overcorrection of Milady and the under characterisation of Constance is the perfect example of this. If you want your Musketeers adaptation to be more feminist, don’t weaken Milady, strengthen Constance. Sometimes a competent female character is all that we need. A Constance who is like Florence Cassel from Death in Paradise or  Ahn Young-yi from Misaeng could really pack a punch.

I adored the energy of the 2011 adaptation, I loved how madcap it was, I loved how it threw historical accuracy to the wind. I thought the king was adorable, and I really enjoyed seeing Orlando Bloom hamming it up as Buckingham. I was genuinely sad that the sequel the ending sets up for never came, because once they got out of the sticky dialogue and into the explosions, the film was great fun. It was a beautiful disaster that never quite came together, but I really enjoyed watching it. I love films that have a sense of wild chaos, some more successful examples are The Devil’s Advocate, Blow Dry and Lego Batman. I think the spirit of going all out on everything can sometimes result in the best cinematic experience, it’s just a shame the script wasn’t really up to muster for 2011 Musketeers. 

I’m excited to see what the next big budget Musketeers adaptation brings, even if I’m going to have to wait another ten years to see it. I hope it’s directed by Chad Stahelski, that’d really float my boat (through the sky, like a zeppelin.)

[virge-of-breaking]

Petals In The Wind

Trigger Warning: Small argument, slightly unhappy ending

Roman is a petal in the wind. His turns soft, his laugh carrying itself across his and Logan’s home. His feet skim over scratched hardwood floors, his hands twist and turn letting himself truly be free to nature's whim. His dancing was the kind that entrapped anyone who saw it, his light step and slow turns seducing the viewer, letting them sit, and just for a second fall weakly to his very way. To Logan, Roman’s dance was intoxicatingly serene. When he looked at him, He knew. In that one small moment he finally let himself feel. He would dance to his own siren song, each step purposeful, each beat meaningful. They’d spend hours in a poorly lit kitchen, dancing in his self imposed uniform, while the more flamboyant of the two sang for an audience of one. Performing like they were in the Don Quixote. Roman was funny like that, he made any ordinary situation a performance. As he twirled, his lips parted. The wispy voice that haunts Logans nights spoke. They spoke nothing but ten words to each other, but in that blunt conversation the ground he stood on was ripped from under him. Leaving Logan falling, alone, just a forgotten petal in the wind.

Roman had been trying to get Logan to dance with him, properly dance, for weeks. Either by entrapping him in a surprise spin, which would usually end in an awkward stumble for either party involved, or humming a slow tune into his flower’s ear. He even tried to figure out a bullshit way to win a debate about how dancing is good for not only the body, but the mind. And as much as Roman had learned, Logan was having none of it. And slowly Roman gave up. The constant song in the key of Roman had slowed to a stop, the sound of dancing feet just up the stairs had turned into endless pacing. And when Logan walked into a silent kitchen, seeing a silent Roman stirring a mug of tea he finally had enough. Their home was silent, the man, the actor, the character he had fallen in love with grew into a cold stranger, and to Logan he might as well have left.     “Alright Roman, what is wrong?” Eyes the color of a decaying rose lifted from the mug on the cold marble countertop. Eyes that usually held a warmth Logan found to be almost comforting, the shadows reminding him of the darkness between the constellations, the highlights the stars. Eyes that he could have grown lost in now looking at him with what looked to be... pain. 

“Nothing- Nothing is wrong, that is like asking the sky why she is blue. Don’t ask questions just let her be beautiful.” His voice rose and sunk with almost planned perfection, an over exaggerated crease dug into his forehead. Taking a step closer Logan extended a hand to grab Roman’s, but stopped himself. Deciding to try and keep the situation from getting any worse, and ignoring the ever growing urge to reach forward and hold Roman, to shake him and ask why he was so closed off, but instead he stood behind a kitchen island, watching the man in front of him try to perform out of the questioning.

“Firstly the sky is blue because the particles scatter in the earth's atmosphere, and blue particles make up the majority. Giving the impression that the sky is blue. Secondly something is clearly wrong. You have been moping around the house all day, you haven’t sang one song in at least three, which for you is cause to call the authorities, and you have barely look at me when we talk.” As he spoke Logan’s shaky voice rose, almost raising to a shout, before he stopped himself. The rolling eyes of Roman was almost enough to make Logan sick. Anger and snapping had been an issue of his for the year they had been romantically involved, and he tried to work on it. Honest to the catholic god he had, but sometimes his voice was cotton filling his mouth, and the only way to get relief was opening it. With a slow shaky sigh Logan pinched the bridge of his nose shaking his head slightly. “Roman my dear, I’m sorry for raising my voice. I am just… concerned with your recent behaviors. You have been pulling away from me, ignoring your usually constant need, to perform in some sort of way, and it makes me feel like something is up.”

Finishing his sentence with a slow sigh Logan made a small nod toward himself, giving himself his own appreciation. Silently walking through the checklist he and his therapist had worked through. Use I feel statements, Take a deep breath, and let him know you need a break when needed. So far he had been 3/3, and he smiled softly at the small sense of pride welling in his chest. The light diminishing when he saw the growing infuriated expression of his counterpart. Romans hand let go of the tea bag, the contact announced with a single splash. He held onto the side of the counter almost like it was his life raft, and the ocean inside of him was raging.

“Pulling away from you?” Roman echoed his words, his voice a deadly quiet. Barely enough to hear, a hushed and angry whisper. “Who’s the one who shooed me away when I tried to hold you? Who’s the one who hushed me when I ‘performed’? Because it wasn’t me.” “Roman I was busy-” But Roman had just started, and he was far from over. The tsunami that was his words had been building up, and Logan just opened the floodgates.

“What about every other time? You’ve made me feel like a guest in my own home Logan! God when I moved in I thought things were going to be different.” “Are- you’re serious? All this because I wouldn’t dance with you? I want to make sure I’m hearing you right. You’re questioning living together because I won’t dance with you?” The disbelief was thick in his voice. Part of him knew he should have shut up, and when the decaying roses that made up Romans eyes retreated back to the mug, and as a few tears started to fill the spots the wilting rose left behind Logan knew he should’ve said something else. And the growing pit in his stomach told him he needed to say something else. But he didn’t. Silence hung over them, the tension thick enough to cut through. And just when Logan was about to turn away Roman spoke again. His voice quiet, like he was vocalizing a thought he wasn’t sure of yet, and the subtle tremble in his voice sent a cold shiver down Logan’s back. “It’s not… just about the dancing. I was trying to tell you I loved you, and everytime you pushed me away it felt like you were… rejecting me.” Oh. Oh. How could he not see it, Roman was pulling away, the entire time he was pulling away because of him, and he was too blind to see it. Letting out a slow sigh Logan gave into the urge to pull Roman closer. Picking up his hand gently he took note of how warm the others hand was in his, how cold his must have been in comparison. Making sure Roman set the mug down he pulled him a little closer, his other arm slithering around his waist. Doubt started to wash over himself in waves. Actions like this weren’t something Logan was accustomed to. He loved Roman, he truly did. But he always thought it was something that was assumed, something he already knew. Only when Roman’s eyes widened slightly, and the crease in his brow smoothed over just for a bit, and only when the preformed facade Roman had faltered for a second, he realized. Roman had no clue that Logan actually cared about him. And that fact made his heart crack slightly. This wasn’t supposed to happen. 

“Roman. I could never, would never, and will never reject you. You make… you make things make sense. You make feelings seem natural. I used to be terrified of feeling, of love, of you! But… you made it all seem okay. You made it less scary because while this is all new territory to me, you were right beside me. Your eyes are like the most perfect galaxies, to the point I don’t need to stargaze anymore. Roman god… you’re my stars, my moon, and everything in between. You are perfect to me, and I would be insane to think anything else.”

Roman looked up to him, the tenseness in his back slowly relaxing into Logan's touch. Shaking his head quietly he let out a small sigh, a slight frown tracing pink lips.

“Lo… it is nice of you to say that, but I need to feel that in order to be happy in this relationship. This isn’t love if all I get is a monologue every month. Do you get where I’m coming from?”

“Yes… yes of course. I promise I will be better at that, now. Would you care to dance?” “Nothing would make me happier.” And the two danced, spinning each other around their poorly lit kitchen, and for the first time for a while, Roman felt loved.

[nonpuppet-sanderssides-ep]

Learning New Things about Ourselves Transcript

This transcript was done by @rosesisupposes​ @everphantom @crushingonanartist @fandomsofrandom​ (who’s urls may or may not have changed at some point, and others, who��s urls had been lost to time and my disorganization.)

This transcript was created for the purpose of creating a comic-version of the video for those who were uncomfortable with the puppetry. This project has been effectively abandoned, and the blog shall be treated as an archive for the work that had been completed. (as explained in this post)

The transcript had been partly split up to create places for artists to draw individual sections, which has remained in tact in this transcript. If people want to utilize this transcript for creating a comic or drawing, I entirely welcome it! As long as all the characters follow a human design, tag this blog and I’ll reblog it. 

14:58 Thomas: Oh, Logan! You’re up!

14:59 Logan: If by up you mean I am not down...to do this, you are correct. 

15:04 Roman: Oh big surprise coming from no fun-son honey dew-dew. Last second addition there, made it, stuck the landing.

15:10 Patton: Aw, Logan come on! We need you at the table if we’re gonna be learning!

15:14 Logan: Please. It has become quite clear that me cosigning all of your ridiculous antics is just a formality. When all of you decided on using puppets to address a serious issue, logic was already figuratively thrown out the window.

15:25 Roman: *dramatic sigh* Again, you don’t have to use the word figuratively. We know you that you weren’t literally thrown out of a window.

15:31 Logan: How? Have you been watching me constantly?

15:33 Patton: Don’t assume Roman! You know what happens when you assume. You make an as out of su and me. 

15:39 Logan: *exasperated sigh* *mumbled* Thank you Patton. *back to normal volume* I just don’t want to concern anybody by suggesting I was throw through a window. I wanted to communicate five by five that I’m five by five. 

15:47 Thomas: It’s okay Roman, his intentions are there. I mean, who does going above and beyond with clarity hurt?

15:54 Roman: Going above and beyond? *laugh* More like going overboard. It’s stupid.

15:58 *Logan inhales, glares at Roman as he crumples up a paper and throws it at Roman with a yell*

16:01 Roman: Ow! Oh my gosh. Oh my gosh!

16:02 Patton: Meep meep!**

16:03 Roman: You hit me in the eye. You hit me in the eye, you freaking bookgerm!

16:07 Virgil: Geez, L, that was pretty rough.

16:09 Logan: Eh- I’m sorry. I-I don’t know what that was. *pause* Maybe I should go.

16:13 Patton: NO! We are not about to leave it there, mister! We can’t continue this convo, if you’re gone-zo

16:21 Thomas: THAT’S RIGHT!

16:21 Thomas: Look, Logan, you can be like one of those Sesame Street human friends!

16:27 Logan: Like Maria?

16:28 Thomas: Like Maria!

16:29 Logan: Okay... I mean, a more accurate comparison would be that you’re our Big Bird, and we’re all your… Snuffleupagus**.

16:36 Thomas: Pre-1985, before they canonically confirmed Snuffleupagus wasn’t imaginary.

16:40 Logan: Of course. *softly* Clarity

16:41 Roman: Hmph-

16:42 Logan: Okay, so- you’re puppets. Care to explain to me how this is going to help?

16:47 Patton: Well, we could start by having an open and honest conversation about our feelings?

16:54 Thomas: *takes a deep breath*

16:55 Roman: Hmmm… 

16:56 Virgil: *groans softly*

16:57 Thomas: I don’t think so.

16:57 Roman: Yeah, I don’t like that.

16:58 Virgil: I’d rather go live in a garbage can.

16:59 Patton: No! Really, this is important, guys! Thomas, you have to face your feelings head-on! Tell me… *singing* do you ever feel like a paper bag?

17:10 Thomas: Wha- I thought we were talking about a loop!

17:13 Patton: Well, how do you suppose we get out of the loop, mister Looper?

17:16 Thomas: Well, I guess I don’t know… but I mean... like- what do I have to feel bad about? I mean, really. Like- yeah, I feel iffy with my videos. So what?

17:27 *Roman sighs as Thomas continues*

17:27 Thomas: Big deal. The ‘problems’ I have wouldn’t even exist without all of the incredible privileges I’ve received. I should feel lucky. I asked for this. So I- I don’t feel like I’ve got a right to feel this way, but-

17:42 Patton: Thomas, that’s ridiculous! Now should you count your blessings? Absolutely! Lots of people are way worse off! 

17:49 Thomas: … oh

17:50 Patton: Yeah, I should not have said that as cheery as I did. --break-- *louder* But… you shouldn’t feel guilty for having feelings! Sure, sometimes your feelings may not make sense, but it’s not your feelings job to make sense! You just… experience them. And you have to do your best to deal with them.

18:07 Thomas: Well that… makes sense. 

18:11 Patton: Not talking about them... is not dealing with them.

18:14 Thomas: Yeah, but I don’t even know where to begin talking about my feelings, because I don’t… understand them right now.

18:19 Virgil: Maybe you won’t have to understand your feelings if you fix the problem.

18:24 Patton: Well…

18:25 Virgil: Logan’s gotta cool it with the deadlines.

18:26 Logan: What?

18:27 Roman: *blows a kiss at Virgil* Thank you!

18:28 Virgil: Too much pressure.

18:29 Logan: Oh, I’m sorry. Except I’m not! Are the deadlines really the cause of that pressure, or is it… I don’t know… *quickly* Roman’s inability to perform adequately?

18:35 Roman: *offended gasp* No!

18:37 Virgil: Well- it’s a little of that. 

18:38 Roman: *weird shocked noise[?]* What??

18:40 Logan: Exactly, boom.

18:40 Virgil: Look dude, doesn’t it make sense to think you have something to do with this? The issue has to do with creating content and his pride? That’s a lot of you.

18:48 Roman: Well pardon me, Vomit-y Central, but when were either of you the experts on creative content? Who are you to criticize my work??

18:58 Virgil: Oh my gosh, what is up your butt?

19:00 Roman: An arm!

 19:00-19:34

THOMAS: Okay, I think it’s clear that pointing fingers is getting us nowhere. So let’s avoid that

PATTON: [Pointing at Thomas] Agreed. Oh, butterfingers!

VIRGIL: [Muttering] That’s not what butterfingers means

THOMAS: Logan, would it be fair to say that with all of this arguing, order is not actually being obtained?

LOGAN: Perhaps we are in a state of disorder because no one is adhering to my instruction

THOMAS: Okay, okay, well, okay, I’m - I’m happy to hear you out, then. What do you think we should do, Logan?

PATTON: Yeah, Logan, help us out, what can you tell us about learning new things about ourselves?

19:34-19:58

LOGAN: Well, it all goes back to the point you made earlier, Patton. Asking the right question: why?

ROMAN: That’s right, today’s video is brought to you by the letter “Y”

LOGAN: No, stop it, stop it, the question “why,” W-H-Y. “Why?” So much of what you feel, Thomas, comes down to whether or not your actions are aligning with your goals.

PATTON: Oh! I think I get it!

LOGAN: What?

PATTON: Yeah!

19:58 - 20:12 [Cut Scene]

[Electric Company Bit: Profiles of Patton and Thomas]

PATTON: Why do you make videos?

THOMAS: Because they’re fun

PATTON: Why did you make it a job?

THOMAS: So I could support myself, and so I could try bigger things

PATTON: Why did your old friend’s question stick with you?

THOMAS: Because…

[End cut scene]

20:12-20:42

THOMAS: Because I always wonder if I’m doing the right thing for a living

LOGAN: Okay, interesting! Elaborate on that. And nobody do any puppet bits

PATTON: Well, that was from The Electric Company

LOGAN: [Waving arms at Patton] Shhhhhh. Thomas?

THOMAS: I don’t know, I guess… As far as I know, we have one life, and I guess I have doubts about… whether or not I’m making the most of mine.

LOGAN: Okay! We’re getting somewhere. Expand upon those doubts

THOMAS: Oh man, um, I… I don’t even know where to go from there

20:42-21:02

LOGAN: I mean if you asked me, I could certainly list off several factors that could be contributing to your doubts.

[Cut to Thomas, then Patton, then Roman all silently looking around as well. No one responds]

LOGAN: If you asked me, I could… gladly share them

THOMAS: [Sigh]

ROMAN: Welp

VIRGIL: [Sigh]

LOGAN: Just lemme know if you want to hear what I have to say

21:02-21:45 epilepsy warning

VIRGIL: Hey Logan, can you list off some of those factors you mentioned?

LOGAN: I’m glad you asked, Virgil. Firstly, there’s no job security, I mean, people fall out of public favor very quickly

VIRGIL: One! One cause of unease, ah ah ah [lightning flash]

LOGAN: You’re balancing a great deal of responsibilities. People have limits; perhaps you can’t continue at this pace indefinitely 

VIRGIL: Two! Two nervous thoughts, ah ah ah [lightning flash]

LOGAN: Your work is inessential. Several may claim that they have been [air quotes] “inspired” by one thing you’ve said or another, but who’s to say they couldn’t have found the inspiration they needed elsewhere?

VIRGIL: Three. Three depressing speculations, ah ah ah [lightning flash]

LOGAN: And oh, oh! I can think of another one. No one takes you seriously!

PATTON: [Audible gasp]

VIRGIL: Four. Four uncomfortable characters in this room right now.

THOMAS: Logan, is that really what you think?

-

LOGAN: Thomas, I have held back my opinions for too long, and that’s obviously not benefiting you. I refuse to withhold my perspective any longer. You need to get a real job.

ROMAN: Hey, yeah! Like being a movie star!

LOGAN: No! A real job.

VIRGIL: Sheesh, you sloppily eat some jam, accidentally make a few puns and now you’re all sensitive about not being taken seriously?

LOGAN: [Interrupting] I’m not a joke! I mean, I can’t be thought of as such. Because there will be times in which I must be heeded and given our current circumstances, I clearly haven’t been. So I’m saying what must be said. I can’t tolerate this foolishness any longer. [To Thomas] You need to change your life around.

-

VIRGIL: Logan, I appreciate what you bring to the table and all, but the thing you just recommended would be a massive change in Thomas’ life sooo I kinda hate you a little bit right now andddd shut your dirty mouth

LOGAN: Ah, typical

THOMAS: I don’t know, Virge, maybe he’s right. Maybe that’s the cause of all this

VIRGIL: Thomas, don’t start. I have plenty of hate to go around

PATTON: Ohhh very funny, Virgil, you cute little muppet! Thomas, you know he doesn’t mean it. And Logan, that was… helpful! When the chips were down, you brought up some very meaty points, you ol’ crackerjack, but this stuff is more than just silly or cheesy, and I’m sorry I keep bringing up food, it’s just the inside of this bag smells like first grade lunch in the cafeteria and so many memories!

ROMAN: [Snaps] Patton, stay with us

23:17

PATTON: Sorry! Boy, I really milked that bit, wakawaka!

ROMAN: (stares in silence, before taking a deep breath) What I think Patton is trying to say is that Logan’s just proven that he’s the worst, and that he’s been the thorn in your side all along

VIRGIL: Could you even contribute like an ounce of constructive input to our conversation today, Dr. Doo-the-Most?

ROMAN: Okay, why don’t you just go get lost in a dryer

VIRGIL: You know, Roman, it’s just too bad your brain isn’t as big as that chin

ROMAN: Well you smell like FOOT!

THOMAS: Roman-

ROMAN: No, Thomas, I know. That wasn’t helpful. In truth, I do feel bad

THOMAS: You do?

ROMAN: Yes

VIRGIL: Well then maybe you should say you’re sorry

ROMAN: You’re right

VIRGIL: Oh, really?

ROMAN: Logan-

VIRGIL: Okay

ROMAN: -earlier, I made you angry. I do that quite a bit, actually. I provoke you, and you retaliated with violence… like a stupid caveman. But! I am responsible for my actions and my actions alone. So, I’m sorry.

LOGAN: Oh, well. That’s. Very kind.

ROMAN: Okay, well, I gave that a shot. I still feel bad.

PATTON: Well, why not try expressing your feelings in a way that makes sense for you?

24:27

ROMAN: Well, that might work. Let’s see (clears throat, then gestures to his right) Maestro?

[MUSIC STARTS]

[Singing] So you’ve gone and called someone stupid And in response, they damaged your eye But, there is where the conflict must end Lest you both end up blind

LOGAN: [Speaking] Another song? Really?

ROMAN: [Singing] Sometimes, the problems at play Are not all plain to see So, we lash out at our loved ones Disregarding our bond sanctity PATTON: There are several sides to us that may seem abstract at first Until we discover where everything fits And, people can be like a half-missing puzzle set As we find the pieces, things make more and more sense THOMAS: Nice imagery, but I'm not sure I follow.

25:27 - 26:00

PATTON: Well I’ll give you an example.

PATTON: [Singing] I had this problem where I’d often hide my less than awesome feelings so when I would feel like sobbing I’d just smile and crack jokes! I thought that that was coping. Only joking, never showing sadness, hoping it would go away.

LOGAN: [Spoken] Did that work?

PATTON: [Singing] Nope! I still felt bad

ROMAN: [Spoken] Aw pat..

PATTON: [Singing] It’s okay

THOMAS: [Spoken] How’s that?

PATTON: [Singing] Everybody gets sad. Even dads that have people to care for! And therefore- You don’t have to hide your pain. Life without rainy days is incomplete!

PATTON: [Speaking] Or, like not even a thing, you know? Rain goes to plants, plants feed animals, plant-eating animals feed animal-eating animals, and humans feed animals corn and inject them with hormones until they can barely walk anymore

THOMAS: Patton?

PATTON: Yes?

THOMAS: How does all that relate to rain?

PATTON: Oh, right! Rainy days. Forgot what I was talking about. Umm... putting it simply, rain is a necessary piece of the puzzle that is, uh, life.

LOGAN: So true. Are we done singing, or is this just one of those musical interludes?

26:22

VIRGIL: On the subject of storm clouds because, you know, you need storm clouds to... make... rain. I'm just gonna get into it. [Singing] You once knew me as real gloomy This weird spooky broody dude Because I knew you'd listen to me As too scary to ignore I thought that I could take it All the hate could just be shaken But when you lo-- care for someone Not much hurts more than their scorn I also felt bad 

ROMAN: [Speaking] Come, now

VIRGIL: [Singing] In a different way 

THOMAS: [Speaking] Different how?

VIRGIL: [Singing] By bad I mean, well, mean But I did what I thought that I had to Which is bad, too I don't have to act all tough

THOMAS: Sometimes love is enough

PATTON: Or what we need

27:00 [END]

[thecatprince]

My Favourite Characterisations of the Sides

Disclaimer these are just how I like to characterise them in my fics and my opinion so if you don’t like these or like something else that is good too!

Roman

- Actor!!!! Obsessed with acting and theatre. He loves being able to transform into a different person and tell a story. Likes to use it as a form of escape

- bookworm!! I love bookworm/writer Roman because firstly projection and I get to put all of my favourite books in my fics, but also for the same reason as he likes acting he likes readings and writing, for the escapism and telling a story.

- I love diving deep into Roman’s insecurities and having him use acting and escapism to run and hide them. Roman who feels like no one knows the real him because he is constantly putting on a mask of confidence and bravado

- I also love the headcanon that @manyfandomsonelog has of Roman writing down the nicknames beforehand because it is funny and also something I feel Roman would do

- I love Roman who sings songs that reflect how he is feeling. Like if he is happy he will sing happy songs and sad he will sing sad songs and if he is feeling insecure he will sing songs about that insecurity (once again totally not projecting at all)

Virgil

- MUSICIAN VIRGIL!! Partially for the projection of my music taste and I also tend to base to base him off of one of my best friends who deals with general anxiety, and gets performance anxiety so bad where she has to record her speeches for school and send them to the teacher instead of talking in front of a class but can go up onstage in front of tons of people with her guitar or drums or piano and just play (she gets nervous of course but music is the one thing that cuts through her performance anxiety). She also plays music really well and plays almost every day.

- Virgil has freckles but is embarrassed by them and hides them with concealer or foundation!

- Also I love my headcanon of Virgil’s old hoodie getting torn up or stained or something but he loves it too much to let go of it so Roman patches it up with purple patches and gives it back to Virgil as a gift. This only works in AUs but still!

- I also love Virgil being snarky and cool, but once he goes too far he will immediately retract and apologise.

- Virgil who it takes a while for him to warm up to people but once he does he is friends for life. He is ride or die!!

Patton

- I love baker patton. Call me basic but him making cookies and dancing around the litchen covered in flour and everything feeling warm happy and cosy is such a nice image. But he can’t cook for shit.

- I love Patton who is kind mainly because he had to deal with a lot of shit when he was younger or has seen how dark the world is and doesn’t want anyone else to feel like that. Because of this people assume he is naive and he feels like no one knows the real him because they just brush him off as kind.

- I sort of try and make Patton’s arc in my AUs a bit like Joy’s in Inside Out, where he always feels the need to be happy and always tried to cheer people up when sometimes they just need to be sad. Also Patton represses all of his sad emotions and learns that sadness is important.

- Patton is generally the shortest and a peacemaker but if you dare insult his friends he will murder you.

Logan

- ASTRONOMER LOGAN RIGHTS!!! I may be a little bit obsessed with a Logan who is obsessed with stars and galaxies and the sky in general!!

- I love a Logan who feels deeply but has trouble expressing it or hates to express his emotions because he hates being vulnerable.

- I love Logan being costantly like ‘are you kidding me?’ with like his head in his hand while the everyone is running around like chaotic gremlins and the house is burning down.

- Also one of my favourite Logan headcanons is that he has plastic glow in the dark stars stuck to the ceiling of his bedroom in the shape of constellations and when he is stressed or anxious he will lie on his bed and name the constellations and the stories behind them to himself.

I will add to this with Janus and Remus and then general later!!

[ts-unpopular-opinions]

Two questions, one sanders sides one not. Firstly: How are you doing? Genuinely just wanna know and check in because if you are dealing with too much in terms of being attacked or such things, please take care of yourself! Hope you are doing well! Secondly: just random but we see the "dark" sides (and patton apparently) having some animal traits. What do you think the light sides would have/what animal do you think fits even if it is less conventional, ie dolphin for logan instead of an owl.

Hi there! Thanks for the questions 🥰 Don’t worry too much about me, I know my limits and will gladly shut off my inbox or delete asks that are rude or innapropriate. Take some time and worry about yourself too 💛

As for your second question: I’ve never been a huge fan of the “each side has an animal trait” theory because I think it may just be coincidental that Remus and Janus both have one. That being said, if this is purely for fun and not really considering canon, then I’d love to give some ideas!

I’m a sucker for when people draw Virgil with those creepy long spider legs coming from his back, and Patton has always given off cat or dog vibes. As for Logan, I’d have to say that owl still seems like the best fit. It goes along with the headcanon that he doesn’t get a lot of sleep and that he loves space and the stars. As for Roman... Man I never really thought about it. Probably some mythical creature like a dragon or a pheonix or something extra like that. I personally thing Janus and Remus are perfect, so I wouldnt change them!

[nyxwordsmithwrites]

60. "You'd be a great dad."49. "Let's have a baby."72. "They're going to love you, don't worry." Analogical

 So I’ve had this one saved in my drafts for a while, and it was much longer than this, but it was a potential AU I didn’t really want to continue (I have so many as it is).Characters: Virgil Sanders, Logan Sanders, RemyDad/Foster AUWarnings: Anxiety Mention, Nightmare Mention

_______

 Virgil didn’t like surprises. To his dying day he would profess how much he hated surprises. And yet, Logan was a constant surprise. There was always something new he’d learned and wanted to gush about, something interesting he wanted to share. Some cool new thing to show Virgil, even if that meant he’d deconstructed and reconstructed something in the living room at four a.m.

 He didn’t mind Logan’s brand of surprises. They were quirky, odd, just perfectly nerdy. Never like Roman’s surprises...ever since childhood they’d been extravagant affairs that made Virgil embarrassed on Roman’s behalf and wish the world would just eat him whole.

 Virgil thought he’d suffered enough of that when the boys accidentally double-proposed to each other. He still couldn’t forget how happy Patton and Roman had been about that...gushing at Virgil and Logan at different times of day...then they’d had the wedding and that was a whole different mess of surprises and second-hand embarrassment…

 So, yeah, Virgil hated surprises. And this one might damn near kill him.

 “I...I’m sorry, what?”

 Logan was beaming at him, that wide toothy smile Virgil had yet to see Logan flash at someone else, his nose scrunched up at little so his glasses sat too high, his eyes bright and shining with little stars. He was excited, that much was obvious to even a passing bystander, but Virgil had just woken up.

 The nerd chuckled as he tried to get his own mop of crazy hair under control with his fingers, “Let’s have a baby.”

 Virgil couldn’t help but stare at Logan in disbelief, his eyes shining excitedly as he managed to get his hair completely under control and searched Virgil’s face.

 Either Logan was really, really excited, or he hadn’t fully processed Virgil’s blinking, shocked stare, because Virgil didn’t snap out of it until the coffee machine pinged softly behind him.

 “How much have you thought about this?” he asked softly, and Logan bounced a little on the toes of his feet, trying to smooth his tie down.

 “A lot.” he whispered, taking Virgil’s hands in his own, “I know it is a lot to take in first thing in the morning-”

 “You proposed to me over morning coffee.”

 “-But...I would really like you to think about it.” he said softly, squeezing Virgil’s hands in his gently, “I think...I think our own child would…”

 Virgil squeezed Logan’s hands back, “Firstly, you gotta stop having amazing, life-changing ideas in your sleep.” Logan flushed a little and giggled, eyes still shining when they met Virgil’s again, “Secondly...does it have to be an infant?”

 Logan blinked a few times, the cogs whirring away behind his eyes, his excited grin softening into a warm and gentle smile, “No.” he answered softly, “No, it does not.” he reassured, “Perhaps phrasing it with ‘baby’ was not my brightest idea.”

 A disbelieving but infinitely fond chuckle escaped Virgil, pulling his husband in for a warm, slow kiss, “Let’s talk about it more.” he offered gently, “Take it slow?”

 Logan beamed back at him, the excitement back in his eyes and Virgil couldn’t help but smile back fondly, “Just like us.” Virgil’s smile turned into a grin as Logan gently kissed the skin just behind his wedding band, flushing as Logan looked back up at him.

 “I am basically a small woodland creature.” Virgil teased and Logan laughed warmly, pulling Virgil in for a warm embrace.

 “My little rabbit.” he teased softly.

 ***

 The conversation had been officially shelved for a few months, save for a few harmless musings between the pair, and though Virgil worried that Logan hadn’t really meant it-

 He kept catching Logan longing for a child.

 It was true that Logan was not exactly...what many considered paternal. Patton easily held that over him, being warm and bubbly and brimming with Dad jokes, but Logan was...definitely pining for a child.

 He’d found a poorly hidden catalogue for children’s furniture in the living room, come across Logan’s laptop with child behavioural research, caught Logan scanning the living room...clearly considering how he’d have to babyproof it…

 And if the proposal, engagement and wedding was anything to go by, Logan was waiting for Virgil to bring it up.

 So, Virgil managed to corner Logan in his study. He hurriedly tried to hide the book he was reading, offering a sheepish smile and blushing, pushing his glasses up his nose, “Virgil!” he chirped, clearing his throat, “I did not hear you knock.”

 “That…” Virgil stepped in, “Would be because I didn’t.”

 Virgil sidled over to his desk, gently pushing things aside to sit on it, legs spread in front of Logan, feet on his chair.

 His expression fell into one of very slight disapproval, “Virgil, I believe I requested-”

 Virgil slid down into his lap, silencing Logan and fishing the book out, “Baby names, huh?” he teased and Logan fell silent, blushing brightly and clearing his throat, “Oh, and child psychology.”

 “Well- uhm- you see-”

 Virgil cupped his cheeks, kissing him gently, “I have some stipulations.”

 He could count on one hand the amount of people who managed to stun Logan, and Virgil himself was on the top of that list, “Oh?”

 “For our first kid…” Logan lit up, “No newborns.” Logan’s face schooled into something more serious as he listened, “Preferably school age and...we take it all slow...learn everything and...make sure we do this properly.”

 Logan’s hands settled on Virgil’s hips, squeezing gently, “I can agree to all of those, if you hear out one of mine?”

 “Hm?”

 “Our second one is a baby.”

 Virgil chuckled softly and nodded, “So...are we-”

 Logan nodded and beamed as Virgil rested his head in the crook of Logan’s neck, “Yeah…” he whispered.

 “Would you hate me if I said I’m scared?”

 Long, strong fingers slid through Virgil’s hair, “Considering the severity of your anxiety and ptsd, I have come terms with the fact that you are fearful most of the time.” he assured gently, “Though, by no fault of your own and no less real whenever  you bring it up.”

 “So...no?”

 Logan chuckled softly, “No.”

 He sighed into Logan’s neck, “I’m just...worried, ya know? What if...they hate me?” he asked softly, “Or...I do it all wrong and I’m a bad Dad and-”

 Logan squeezed his hip and Virgil sat up, meeting Logan’s eyes. Those long, strong fingers of his gently stroked along Virgil’s jaw, “You’d be a great dad.”

 “How do you know?” Virgil asked softly.

 He playfully rolled his eyes with a slight, fond smirk, “You would have me believe otherwise?” he asked, “I have plenty of evidence to the contrary.”

 “Lay it on me.”

 Logan chuckled, pressing a few buttons on his laptop, “One moment-”

 “You didn’t.”

 “-and-”

 “It’s the wedding all over again.”

 “-there it is.”

 A powerpoint was open on the computer, simple in design, but it was clear Logan had taken pointers from the wedding and proposal powerpoints...considering they had been plain white and Virgil’s eyes had started hurting after a while.

 In the sidebar were clear comments and sections and Virgil couldn’t help but smile at one slide, aptly marked ‘To-do list’. Another one of Virgil’s pointers, a short summary so Virgil could see what needed to be done and what had been...so he didn’t get overwhelmed.

 Logan had learned that one the hard way with the wedding.

 “How many slides is this one?”

 “Fifty-seven.”

 “Fifty-!” Virgil exclaimed.

 “To be fair, twenty of them are infographics or cute photos.” Logan explained, “Now, may I?”

*

 Virgil wasn’t sure how to explain how this felt. A death march? His wedding all over again? Walking down the aisle had been downright terrifying...even if he’d been able to see Logan at the end, eagerly waiting with his hand out. This was different...there was no goal in sight, even if it was in this building specifically.

 Logan rounded the car to him, hand slipping expertly into Virgil’s like it was made to be there. His skin was warm against Virgil’s, squeezing lightly as Logan pulled him closer, “It will be alright.” Logan reassured gently, kissing his cool skin, “Breathe, my love.”

 Virgil forced a deep breath, barely able to tear his eyes away from the building to meet Logan’s, “What if they-”

 “They are going to love you, do not worry.” Logan’s warm voice interrupted Virgil.

 “I wasn’t-”

 “Sure, you weren’t.” Logan teased back gently, kissing the tip of his nose, “It is only the one major concern you have had throughout the process.” Logan continued, his voice teasing and light, “And the source of many nightmares, I presume.”

 Virgil huffed, “I didn’t tell you for a reason.” he pouted and Logan smiled gently.

 “And that is why I did not ask.” he answered lightly, pulling Virgil in for a slow kiss. It started out chaste and gentle, intended as nothing more than a few seconds of contact to try and reassure his husband. But when Logan tried to break away, Virgil pulled him back. Hungry for more reassurance, afraid of what would happen inside.

 And as always, Logan heard his cry. He knew that sometimes it was hard for Virgil to say what he needed with words...but touch was another language altogether. And Logan had tried hard to learn Virgil’s particular dialect.

 His arm slid around Virgil’s narrow waist, pulling him flush against him as the kiss slowly deepened, Logan’s touches firm and reassuring. Confident, even, while Virgil’s felt more frantic and nervous, shaky and hungry.

 And in time, as Logan held him close and let Virgil search for the touch he needed, Virgil calmed. Finding the reassurance and drinking it all up.

 When they parted, they were panting softly, sharing breath that smelled of toothpaste, mint and a trace of coffee, Logan’s eyes glowing warmly down at Virgil’s, their foreheads pressed together.

 “I’m ready now.” Virgil whispered, blushing a little as Logan grinned at him and guided him inside. He couldn’t quite recall what happened after that. This was more Logan’s territory, speaking with multiple strangers, answering questions, filling out paperwork.

 It was, quite frankly, one of Logan’s jobs.

 But it all flew over Virgil’s head. He was too busy trying to get acquainted with a room before they were shipped into a new one, over and over, new offices, new waiting rooms...it took several hours but it felt like a blur for Virgil.

 Finally, Logan pulled Virgil into another waiting room. This one was brightly coloured, reminding Virgil of the pediatrician’s waiting room when he was child. He’d hated it then too…

 It was quiet, save for a television faintly playing a children’s television show on the other end of the room, and Virgil followed pliantly as Logan pulled him into a plastic seat.

 “Not long now.” Logan reassured softly, “Do you need help centering?”

 Virgil blinked at him, “I- Logan, I’m-”

 “You are pale, love.” Logan assured, pulling a handkerchief out of his pocket, “And sweating.”

 “Oh, ew.” Virgil took the thin fabric, gently wiping his face.

 “I know that was a lot of movement and faces for you.” Logan assured, keeping his voice low in the near silent waiting room, “But try and relax now.” he kissed Virgil’s cheek gently, “You need not look so afraid.”

 “It’s okay if I say I am afraid, right?”

 Logan nodded, “Yes, it is.”

 Gentle and slow, Logan started to tap on Virgil’s knuckles, the pair silent as they waited. Virgil slowly calmed, resting his head on Logan’s shoulder and sighed deeply.

 “Tired, love?”

 Virgil chuckled softly, “A little.”

 “Already a perfect Dad.”

 “Dad joke.”

 “Sh-”

 “Logan and Virgil Lewis?”

 Logan got to his feet as Virgil’s head snapped to the voice, “That is us.”

 The warm woman beamed at them both, looking just as excited as Logan did, “Just through here.”

 Of course, walking across the waiting room, Virgil’s fears naturally preyed on him. He remembered rooms like this himself, though...they were never intended as permanent homes.

 And Virgil knew enough about this child that he would expect the same from them.

 Hopping from home to home, listing several different issues, but none seemed willing to settle on the same cause. Bully, manipulative, rude, poor behaviour, difficult, problem with authority…

 It depended on who they asked, apparently.

 But Virgil knew what that really meant...it was a kid who was scared and probably angry or sad, lashing out at a system that insisted on keeping them moving and unstable.

 These people fostered troubled kids, expecting fear to make them angels...but even Virgil knew that wasn’t how kids worked. And Logan knew that wasn’t how foster kids worked.

 The meeting room was the same gaudy colouring as the waiting room, clashing shades of green, orange, red and yellow with some blue for contrast, making Virgil almost sick at the memory. What was it with brightly coloured but clashing rooms for kids?

 There were various toys scattered around, no doubt fiddled with by other kids who’d been in that day, all spreading out from a box at a far window.

 But Virgil’s eyes slid along the room, even as Logan chatted to the social worker until he found him. The child they’d come to take home.

 Sitting at the other large window overlooking the city, his brown hair was a greasy mess, flopping into his face as he stared out at the cityscape before him. His shirt was too big and ratty in some places, no doubt a hand-me-down from a family some time long ago, and his jeans were worn through, the knees completely torn open and the ankles worn away into tatters.

 Virgil looked to where his belongings were being kept for the time being, and frowned at the single plastic bag waiting for them. It didn’t even look full...twelve, and this kid had already learned to pack light.

 “How long has he been in the system again?” Logan asked quietly.

 The social worker sighed as the boy shifted uncomfortably. Ah, he could hear the whispers.

 “Six years.” Virgil answered softly, “On average two homes per year.” he added and Logan’s face twisted with pity.

 He asked more questions to the social worker as Virgil peeled away, making his way slowly across the room toward the child. Early puberty hadn’t kicked in yet, still round and soft features as he sat curled in a ball, staring out at the cityscape and passing birds.

 Virgil caught a wary glance as he folded himself down beside him, looking out at the city in silence for a few moments. He knew the kid was getting uncomfortable...even Virgil knew most families expected the typical ‘run-into-your-arms’ scenario like they had a hero complex…

 “It’s quiet up here, huh?” Virgil asked softly and the kid jerked in surprise, eyes wide as Virgil leaned closer to the window, “All those people...seem so small from up here.”

 The kid nodded slowly, choosing to keep quiet, though Virgil caught disdain hidden in his eyes. He was fidgeting with a pair of shades in his hands, grimy from his fingers over the lenses.

 “Can I clean those for you?” Virgil asked gently, hand open and palm up on his knee but not encroaching on the kid’s space.

 He was wary, pale green eyes wide as he looked from Virgil’s open hand to his face and back again a few times, before hesitantly relinquishing his shades. Virgil cleaned them carefully with the hem of his shirt, smiling when they were clean and inspecting them.

 “Hmm, they’ve been loved a lot, huh?” he asked quietly, offering them back, “You’ve got a screw loose, maybe Lo could fix it for you.” the boy took his sunglasses back but left them in his lap.

 They were quiet a few more moments, the soft murmur of Logan’s and the social workers voices providing a soft hum to fill the void.

 “I’m Virgil, by the way.” he spoke softly, smiling gently when the boy nodded slowly, “I know I’m supposed to say I’m your new dad…” the boy tensed a little, “But I’m happy with just cool uncle too.”

 He knew that would throw the kid for a loop, his shoulders dropping and head snapping to his, eyes wide in disbelief, “You’re not...like, forcing me too?” he asked quietly.

 Virgil met his eyes, careful not to look too intimidating, “I’ve been in the system, I know it’s...weird.” The kids face screwed up a little, “Meeting a parent for the first time-” Virgil looked back out the window as the kid kept staring at him, “-and being expected to call them Dad or Mom…” he sighed, “Especially if you already had those.” The kid swallowed hard, “So...you can call me Virgil, if you’d like.”

 “Virgil…” the kid tested it out in his mouth, looking out the window. More silence fell over them for a time, though the social worker left and Logan milled about with the file. “I don’t like the name on my file.”

 “Oh?”

 The kid nodded, “Call me...Remy.”

 A warm smile split onto Virgil’s face, “Remy...I like it.” he nodded and saw the slightest tinge of pink from Virgil’s approval, “Tell me...Remy…” the kid tensed again, “Is that all you brought with you? That bag?”

 Remy nodded slowly, looking down to his shades and fidgeting with them, “It’s all I got left.” he whispered, “Sometimes...they didn’t gimme enough time to pack so…”

 “Things got left behind…” Virgil finished for him, frowning as he looked out the window. A few minutes of silence passed and Remy eventually realised he didn’t have to stare at his shades, looking back out the window again.

 Logan moved a little closer, keeping a fair distance and Virgil smirked as Remy regarded Logan suspiciously, dodging his gaze and tensing when Logan met his eyes with a warm smile.

 “Hey, Remy.” Virgil spoke softly.

 “Yeah?”

 “Why don’t you put your shades on?”

 Remy fidgeted, “They...said I’m not allowed to.” he answered quietly, “I’m supposed to...look parents in the eye.”

 Virgil huffed, “Who’s to say you can’t do that with your shades on?” he smirked when Remy lifted his face to Virgil, “I also know you’ve got some photosensitivity.”

 Remy frowned, “They make me take medicine for that.”

 “But it doesn’t make it go away, huh?”

 Remy shook his head slowly, looking down at his shades. The kid was seriously considering it, fidgeting with them for a little bit, “You...don’t...mind?”

 Virgil’s heart broke at the hesitation and fear in his voice, like Virgil would take it back or break them if he did without making absolutely sure. Virgil had hoped no kid would live through what he did but...here he was.

 Another example of a broken system.

 “I don’t mind.” he assured softly, smiling as Remy slowly slid the shades on.

 Virgil let the quiet fall over them again, giving Remy time to relax and adjust. It was clear for a few minutes that Remy didn’t believe he could wear them repercussion free, not until Virgil huffed and stretched his legs.

 “Ya know, the colours in this room are gross.” Remy’s face twisted in agreement, “And I wanna get out of my suit.” A slight smirk threatened to pull on Remy’s face, “You wanna bounce?”

 Remy shifted, clearly torn...but he knew he couldn’t stay there. Sure, if he said no, the office would put him back in another facility but...the facilities sucked even worse than homes.

 He got up slowly and Virgil groaned as he got to his feet, “I’m getting too old for floors.” Remy stifled a giggle behind his hand, “Can I introduce you to my husband?”

 “Hus-band?” Remy asked, glancing nervously to the door and back, “You’re gay?” he whispered.

 Virgil snickered, “Flaming gay.”

 Remy gasped and followed Virgil as he moved toward Logan, who glanced up from his file.

 “Remy, this is Logan.” he spoke warmly, as Logan offered his hand to shake, “He’s my giant nerd.”

 That earned a surprised giggle and Remy shook his hand, calming and relaxing a little even as Logan got to his feet, “I am a giant nerd.” Logan countered warmly, earning another giggle from Remy, “Now, I am led to believe that bag is full of your belongings?”

 Remy shifted on his feet and Virgil realised how worn out his sneakers were. And it wasn’t just that the shirt was too big...the kid himself was too small. Had they fed him at all?

 “Yes, sir.” he answered softly.

 Logan shook his head, “You may call me Logan.” he reminded, “May I carry your bag?”

 Remy had clearly never been asked that before, looking nervously up at Virgil for some kind of guidance, “Yes or no, kid.” Virgil teased with a slight smirk, “Your choice.”

 Remy blinked behind his shades, considering his options, “I...um...yes, please…?”

 He nodded, moving over to the bag and easily picking it up into his hands. Logan’s eyes flashed with concern at how little was in the bag and Virgil raised his eyebrows. The kid was in school. He should have had books or a backpack to make it heavier…

 Virgil hummed, “Remy?”

 “Yeah?” Remy clearly struggled with swallowing the ‘sir’ that time.

 “Do you have a jacket?” he asked quietly, “It’s kinda cold out.”

 “Um, no.” he answered, rubbing his arm as Logan’s wide eyes met Virgil’s in alarm, “It got...stolen...I’m-”

 Virgil shrugged off his blazer and winked to Logan, “Here.” Remy jerked in shock as Virgil set it over Remy’s shoulders, “That’ll help a little.”

 “But, sir, I-!”

 Virgil crouched down to his level, “Can I carry you to the car?” he asked quietly, “I know you’re twelve-” he reminded Remy, “But those shoes look painful to walk in.”

 Remy hesitantly slid his arms through the sleeves, clearly surprised that Virgil didn’t reprimand him, “I...guess?”

 Virgil grinned, pulling Remy up onto his hip, “How’s that?” he asked, smiling warmly when Remy only nodded and rested his head on Virgil’s shoulder, the sleeve of his blazer pressed to his mouth.

 Logan led the way out and Virgil couldn’t help the smug pride that filled with his chest at the surprised looks from social workers and secretaries. Clearly Remy had fought before, and probably with good reason, and Virgil feared what they’d find once they got Remy home…

 But he already knew Remy was a good kid. Somewhere beneath the shell he’d had to make and the twisted lessons he’d learned in the system...there was a good kid. He just needed a safe place to come out.

[puffbts]

Full moon

(Inktober day 18)

Pairing: Analogical

*

"You'll bump into something if you keep looking up at the sky like that." Virgil nudged Logan in the shoulder.

They were walking in the street and Logan was taking advantage of the clear sky to observe the moon. He allowed himself a quick glance at Virgil and looked back up.

"Nonsense. Firstly, I have a peripheral vision that renders me aware of my surroundings even if I'm not looking directly in front of me." Virgil rolled his eyes at that. He hadn't asked for a lesson on the functions of the eye.

Logan continued his explanation, although he sensed Virgil's reaction. "Secondly, you're right next to me and looking in front of you, so you can intervene if anything occurs."

"Or I might save myself and forget you."

Logan ignored him and extended his hand towards the moon.

"Isn't it incredible that we always see the same side of the moon?" Virgil was about to answer but he understood that it was a rhetorical question when Logan continued. "I wish I could go to other countries to see what their moon looks like."

Virgil frowned at the idea and then his face softened. "You could do that, you know."

Logan finally focused back to Virgil. "What?"

"What stops you from going around the world and do that?"

"Hm. The cost, the inaccessible places, the time, the-"

"Yeah, I get it. But it's your dream, so you should try hard to achieve it."

Logan frowned. "I don't think about going to other places to watch the moon while I sleep."

Virgil didn't know whether to laugh fondly or to be seriously concerned.

"You need to stop taking everything I say literally. I mean it's something that you want, a lot."

"Oh, yes. It doesn't mean I can achieve it easily."

"I guess you're right in that." Virgil shrugged.

They walked a few minutes in silence, one watching the sky, the other watching his feet.

"Lo?"

"Yes?" Logan replied, not wincing at the nickname like he used to in the beginning of their relationship.

"Why are you so interested in the moon?"

Logan looked at Virgil, raising an eyebrow.

"Do you really want me to tell you?" He asked, knowing in some corner of his mind that he tended to annoy people when talking about a subject that he was passioned about.

"Yes, I want to know." Virgil smiled warmly.

"Well, it's not only the moon but the whole universe, the stars, the galaxies, all that system. As for the moon, I love the mystery that revolves around it, because it means you can discover new facts about it even when you think you know everything. I also like that even though it's a long distance from the Earth, it still has a lot of consequences on it, such as the movement of the seas or-"

"Or the werewolves?" Virgil cut in, smirking.

Logan frowned at him, then studied his face.

"I know that this is supposed to be a joke. And it's not funny, because mythical creatures are a fruit of the imagination of men. So the moon has no relation whatsoever to these."

"I'm sorry, I know I shouldn't be teasing you on that subject." Virgil couldn't help but laugh.

"You are forgiven. Do you want me to tell you more about the moon or would you rather we talk about an interest of yours."

"You are an interest of mine, so we can talk about the moon if you'd like."

Logan pulled a face at this weird statement, but when Virgil stretched out his hand, he took it in his own.

"Then, I'd like to hear you speak."

***

[ellistruggle]

he should be asleep by now

Virgils Room / Logans Room / Pattons Room

@thatsthat24 Romans Room how I imagine it 

(more details under the cut)

so... here it is... i am done with my exams and sketched that real quick =D i am so sorry if anyone is dissappointed or imagined something else! believe me, i didnt think it would look completely different too but somehow it ended up like this =D  i really overdid it with Logans Room. it had too much detail and i didnt wanna work on the next one for that long too so i cut some of the ideas out of the drawing but imma list some things which i imagine are definitely in the room but i was too lazy to draw =D: Firstly, i wanted to make as many playbill prospetcs and disney posters into the room.. just imagine they are in the drawers and on the walls which you can’t see on the pic =D i wanted to make a gigantic mirror to challenge myself again with yknow.. drawing everything in the mirror but i ended up with a small one =D i wanted to add many sketchbooks full of ideas because he is infact, creativity... they are in the drawers too now i wanted to make a wardrobe full of all the stage outfits thomas had for all of his productions.. now they are also in the space you dont see =D i wanted to draw an instrument, either a piano, or a violin... idk i scratched that idea real quick cause i am lazy.. imagine a white piano in the room somewhere i wanted to add a microphone.. i even sketched it, then i forgot the lineart for it and after finishing it, it doesn’t fit into the aesthetic anyway tbh alright, time for some CLOSE UPS!!! WOHOOO

the outfit had to be in the room somewhere so, the sash and one part of the prince outfit !!! the papers: i had to add something to show that he is literally the embodiment of creativity. so here are some quick drafts with some musical notes, a list with video ideas, a half finished poem for a loved one and a list on how to stop insulting people  =D

you can see two tiny pictures here... its actually Thomas in both of those, wearing the outfit from Into the Woods and from Heathers.. yknow.. cause he is a theatre kid and Roman likes to think back on these stage performances

a glass door leading to Romans Kingdom, where he gets to have aventures every now and then! i read so many fics and headcanons, where Roman owns a castle and stuff and i just wanted to add it somehwere 

so, these are inspired by @poppysanders headcanon about how Roman can give experiences to the others =) and they wrote how he took Patton out to fly on clouds on his birthday! also, @starlight-sanders wrote an add on, where Logan and Roman discuss over the stars and the universe, and where Roman went to a concert with Virgil and i just loved this soo so much.

these are Romans favorite experiences with the others and he had to put memories of those into his room =)

there is a small book on the nightstand. i believe this is his diary for writing down all of these experiences.

also, @pipapatton is a sweetheart and gave me the first feedback and noticed, that the R on his pyjama should be mirrored... i am so stupid =D but again, i was too lazy to change that, so know, that i am aware of that. 

THAT WAS IT, FAM!! i hope you like it =) if you like my art, you could donate a kofi on my page here! if you dont, its fine! 

reblogs and comments are HIGHLY appreciated!

Taglist:

@lamp-calm-sanders @ultimate-queen-of-fandoms2 @xxashwiixx @davidthetraveler @eclectichedgehog @anxiousklutz @i-am-hughesless @cringyfander @missmashmain @romanasanders @aquilacalvitium @ziallwarrior @just-fic-me-up @angered-turtle @sanders-sides-thuri @pandagirl0730 @notalwaysthevillian @virgiliananxiety @alkimara @thesoftestlittlepuffball @grumpymoonbird @llamaavocado @angst-patton @pearls-of-patton @toujours-fidele @teacupfulofstarshine @mandeebobandee @praiseforphan @hopeful-gaming1205 @lostwithoutmyblogger-wink @owlish-lesbian-rebooted @wicked-delights @aaydence @roxiefox23 @book-of-charlie @bobolovesoze @punch-you-with-friendship @smearly-a-little-blog @wildheart49 @vigilantvirgil 

i am sorry if i tagged anyone who didnt want to be tagged or if i forgot anyone (some blogs on my list arent there anymore?? tumblr fucked up again) also i am very surprised that so many peops wanted to be tagged!