#turns out i just have autism

[ragefromwithout]

if your mom never tried to cast demons out of you as a kid, did you really grow up southern baptist?

[saturnsocoolioyep]

In the same vein as "I've been taking my medication for long enough that I haven't experienced any symptoms in a while, I must not need to take it anymore! (Spoiler alert: the meds are why you haven't had symptoms)" I present to you a similarly clownish thought process- "I haven't experienced that trigger in a long time, maybe I was just exaggerating how bad it was and it'll be fine to engage with this! (Spoiler alert: take a fucking guess babes)"

[kkoct-ik]

some vaguely on model doodles as i try to work out what is wrong with them (what they look like)

[cluedoenthusiast]

can't sit still [x]

more of al talking about headphones

[mango-sideburns]

My fav thing about TAZ is that any aspect out of context sounds fucking bonkers.

Like, in the balance finale there's a scene in which Garfield (who is very specifically never described visually bc most people imagine him as like. The Lasagna Cat. Who in this universe is the most powerful warlock in the realm and also has a hobby of cloning people, which is great for the one character that got forced into haunting a mannequin) is summoned by an alien spaceship that runs on the power of friendship so he could beat up some flashing balls. In D&D.

And that was just. Such a normal scene in the narrative. No one blinked an eye. I would like to bow down to Griffins clear unmatched talent for making me feel such big emotions over ridiculous shit like a goddamned umbrella or a regular ass pair of jeans or the idea of a taco recipe.

[some-teeth-in-a-trench-coat]

hey uh I've only used airbnb twice because I don't live in America but I'm seeing posts about how hotels are better in every way and while I can't speak to the accuracy of most arguments I'd like to point out the nuance that for people like me having access to a kitchen (something hotels basically never give) is absolutely a requirement if I'm staying more than like one night. The vast majority of food served in hotels and restaurants I can't eat and chances are I won't be able to check in advance if I'm going to run into enough exceptions to not make myself sick (twice I've gotten sick traveling because I wasn't able to find enough foods and spent a week eating like two ingredients, due to unforeseen complications). I need a kitchen or I can't risk going. Kitchenless hotel rooms are an accessibility issue.

[moomeecore]

im actually really good at admitting when i dont know things its just that people keep talking to me about things that i know a lot about and am objectively correct on

[scificrows]

Is there a 300 page essay about Murderbot's armor (specifically the opaque helmet) as a not-so-subtle metaphor for masking in a clearly neurodivergent character already? Because I need it.

The way Murderbot is unvoluntarily without its opaque armor in All System Red in front of the crew (i.e. unmasking) and appears surprised at its own strong facial expressions and other people's reaction to it? The vulnerability that comes with that and how Murderbot spends pretty much the rest of the book wearing or actively missing its armor which keeps it safe from the mortifying ordeal of being known (yet sometimes other characters suggest it might help for it to not opacify the helmet in order for others to see it as a person and to trust it (and in the end idk if it would have achieved the rewards of being loved by its humans and have had its needs met if it hadn't unmasked in this relatively safe environment sometimes)).

Also there's the whole avoiding-looking-directly-at-people-and-using-drones-instead thing which Murderbot usually hides using the opaque helmet, but whenever it doesn't have that people notice it and many react negatively/confused. I think that's a whole neurodivergent-applicable situation in and of itself? Like damn

And then Mensah encourages Murderbot not to wear armor on Preservation station since it would not need it there, Murderbot is hesitant but ends up not wearing any (like 4 books later when we finally get to that bridge) (going for the comfortable clothes it chose for itself instead, with very strong feelings about the whole being able to make choices thing that I cannot go into further at this point because I would absolutely end up BITING SOMETHING OR SOMEONE).

And I'm not going to advocate for unmasking all the time in any setting because hell no, sometimes it absolutely sucks and people are irritated by Murderbot's now visible quirks and are afraid of what they don't know, but many GET TO KNOW Murderbot better and because there are other people that make sure Murderbot is safe and respected and are willing to get people fired for it if they disrespect it (Pin-Lee my beloved) Murderbot can experiment with this situation without being exiled to some abonded part of a planet and other people are forced to spend enough time around ot to learn to respect it and even like it. I just....... It must be so scary and Murderbot is handling so much at once and in this essay I will

PS sorry this is a disorganized mess but so am I and I have so many Thoughts and even more Emotions and so little patience.

[a-concert-just-for-me]

QB ADHD test is crazy for autists bc tell me why you’re gonna strap this super uncomfortable headband to my head and also have the lights bright in the room bright af and then have the laptop flash images at me too

Like????????

[wisecrackingeric-2]

Can I be mega autistic here and vent for a second and ask if anyone else is lowkey scared for whatever the next RE game is HSBWHDNDJ

[conanssummerchild]

me and my dad are like abed and jeff in the way that jeff always gets abeds references, theyre two characters that mirror eachother, they understand and relate to eachother in a way thats different from other characters relationships, but also in the way jeff fantasises about strangling abed, "you try to get him to do something normal without abusing him!", "youre a robot, abed". and still jeff goes in for two hugs before abed leaves.

[loverpupz]

meeting with your fam for christmas so crazy cuz ure just reminded where u got ur autism genes from

[autisticlee]

sometimes people who struggle like to make jokes or find positives about their condition that causes them to struggle so they can escape the constant negative and struggle. sometimes autistic people will say things like "the 'tism" or use the "autism creature" or say their autism helped them have a *positive trait* to feel better about their struggles. because living your life only focusing on the struggles and negatives is depressing and makes it hard to want to live, even if those struggle take up 100% of your life and you can't actually escape them. sometimes any little seemingly positive thing can help a lot.

but there's so many other autistic people that hate when we do that and call it "reducing autism to a cute trendy thing" and say it takes away from *their* struggles and is bad and shouldn't be used. maybe *you* want to only focus on your struggles, but some people can't live in constant negative and need some positive or to find ways to make their condition more positive so they can feel better about living with their struggles. life is hard. I take anything I can get.

I cant get jobs. I can't make and keep friends. I can't get help and support for doing "normal" things so sometimes I go weeks without being able to shower and without eating more than a bowl of cereal a day. most times can't even do things I like. struggle to communicate. have meltdowns. i'll never be able to live independently. I struggle a lot. but instead of sitting here always depressed and having no motivation to live, i'd rather try to joke about "my 'tism is acting up again" when i'm struggling (just an example. don't think I ever actually used the 'tism thing but i saw others use it) or say "i'm just being a creature" when I need to stay in my dark room because everything is too much and I personally find it cute to be a little creature meant in a positive way. i'm not actually downplaying mine or anyone else's struggles. I still acknowledge them and that silly jokes dont make them go away. i'm not trying to be trendy. i'm not doing any of the things people say we do by making silly little jokes. i'm using the silly little jokes to convince myself life can be a little more than pointless, painful garbage all the time.

(continue in tags)

[waitineedaname]

hey I have something in my mind, can you help me? a lot of people say binghe was going to confess after the immortal conference but I don't remember anything about that in the novel? i'm asking you cause you're the svsss encyclopedia for me 🙇🙇

omg i'm so flattered to be the svsss encyclopedia! I'm always happy to be someone's canon consultant lol

binghe planning to confess after the immortal alliance conference is just a common headcanon! there's nothing in the novel that says this is his plan, though there are some things that point to it making sense -- binghe is very confident about his place in his shizun's affections in this point and pretty blatantly flirty about it (at least blatant to anyone who isn't shen qingqiu). consider the "am I pleasing to look at?" bit. he's seventeen at this point, and he probably thinks that's Adult Enough (it is not, but good try binghe) so it would make sense if he was planning to use the conference as a way to prove himself as a cultivator and prove he's worthy to court shen qingqiu. so it's not canon, but it's a headcanon that makes sense in the context of canon! I can't help but wonder what would've happened if the abyss incident never happened and he'd actually succeeded in confessing...

[bookwyrminspiration]

just like queer people, autistics will find each other even before knowing they’re autistic, and one by one everyone will have their realization until you’re comically losing you’re shit every time because fucking AGAIN?!? ANOTHER ONE?!?

[stabyou]

the way i need genuine intense psychological rewiring just so i can talk to people in a normal setting is just crazy to me. i would ask what happened to me but i have always been this way, it just keeps getting worse and worse