#suspected PTSD

[lunareclipse555]

🚫MINORS DO NOT INTERRACT🚫 YOU WILL BE BLOCKED!

Hey, this is my first post! I had a blog prior under the same name, but it’s deleted! I still am not used to Tumblr, plus my old blog went untouched for MONTHS! 🙄

Introduction

🍷 Name

People usually call me Luna or Kat.

🌍 Country

🇸🇪 Sweden! 🇸🇪

🍻 Age

21 years old (2003)

🌹 Gender + pronouns

AFAB, she/her

🧠 Diagnosis

Diagnosed with Unspecified Personality disorder and hypersexuality disorder.

Suspected ASPD and PTSD. The PTSD symptoms were present at younger age and have a tendency to fluctuate a lot and is the reason I entered therapy to begin with.

🎨 Hobbies

Drawing // Listening to music // Playing games // Reading // Playing piano // Live-streaming + VTubing // History // Psychology // Philosophy // Biology // Criminology // Movie + video making (esp. acting & editing) // Baking // Hanging out with people

There’s a lot of things I like to do, and still I’m bored.

❤️ Things I like!

• Call of duty: Zombies | I started playing world at war when I was 6 years old and has been my comfort game series throughout my childhood, ESPECIALLY the zombies game mode. Love campaign and multiplayer too though ❤️

• Horror movies, games, artists and books! | For example I really love Harlan Ellison’s I have no mouth and I must scream, Fran Bow, HR Gigers art. Psychological horror is my favourite horror, however I do love slashers too. Kinda like a brain rot for me, lol.

• American McGees plushies dreadful, I love them! ♥️ | Me and the ASPD bunny do have a love/hate relationship. He’s so fugly ❤️ but I kinda like it, idk? Would still wanna see a redesign too!

• Video game collecting | I love the games I’ve collected! Physically I own a PS1, PS2, PSP, Wii, Xbox 360 and a switch! ☺️ I’m proud of my collection soo far, might upload pics ✨

• Fandoms | Besides previously mentioned fandom’s like CoD, slasher horror and IHNMAIMS I’m in a lot more fandoms! I tend to go in and out of fandoms but for example Class of ‘09, silent hill, team fortress 2, Django unchained, metal gear solid and soo on so forth!

🚫 Dislikes

• People who unironically believe in ASPD/NPD/BPD/HPD abuse. Abuse is abuse, let’s not blame certain disorders for it. There’s sexual, physical and psychological abuse, abusers are abusers. Full stop.

• Self-righteous “empaths” who think they’re far better and more moral than others. Hate them, always have.

• Armchair psychologists, generals or whatever else where you think you’re so much smarter than the actual professionals because you said so. I appreciate knowledge, don’t appreciate unnecessary arrogance.

• People who get emotionally attached to their argument unless it makes sense to do so. I understand if you get emotional over conflicts involving human lives, fine. But if it’s an objective discussion, I’m not going to keep the conversation going if you keep being annoying and repeating arguments.

•——•——•——•——•——•——•——•——•——•

I’m here to meet others, whether it’s because of mental health, fandoms, interests or whatever! I’m very open to chat and meet new people! ♥️

[narcvampp]

` I don't give a fuck 'cuz I'm a millionare! `

INTRODUCTION POST

Nonhuman nightmare(godkin, vampkin, zombkin, dollkin, and therian)

HEAVILY disordered; Npd. Bpd. Hpd. Autism. Did. Ptsd

Memory loss. Psychosis. Depression

Anxiety. Suspected bipolar. Aspd traits. Hypersexual. Paraphile(Anti-contact, have multiple.)

'Obsessive love disorder' . StPD . + more

Proudly 'claimed' /ij, but in all seriousness, do not try to engage in a "friendship" unless we do so first. Our guard dog bites.

Taken + dating someone in my thoughts tbh

Minor. MDNI blogs can int, but we also do not check blogs before we int/follow back.

CW for some of our posts; we will post/rb shit about drugs, possible sexual content, violence, and ocassionally triggering topics(e.g., self harm, sa)

All of our names + pronouns.

No DNI, block us if we fit yours, we'll block you if we want. However, some of our stances are; anti-endo(of all breeds), anti-transid/radqueer/whatever you call yourselves, anti-contact paraphile for harming or non consenting actions.(e.g., acting on pedophilia or zoophilia)

Tags for posts; #vamp diary - all basic posts, #vamp sillies - responding to asks, #utterly insane - vent posts, #millionare - reblogs, #coffinshipping brainrot - exactly whar ir sounds like.

If you have any questions, our asks are open.

(Div creds @/mmadeinheavenn)

[lastoneout]

Day 3 of not sleeping: Didn't have any nightmares, thank god(I had a very long and involved One Piece dream??), but I tossed and turned and woke up a bunch and def didn't get anywhere near enough sleep. I'm awake now but I feel like completely shit, no migraines yet at least but I have a feeling that's going to change soon. Idk how tf I used to live like this.

[likelyapsychopath]

Say it with me, folks:

Having special interests and difficulty socializing doesn't mean you're autistic.

Being forgetful doesn't mean you have ADHD.

Being terrified of something doesn't mean you have a phobia.

Being deeply affected by a traumatic event doesn't mean you have PTSD.

Not trying to be a dick here, but I'm tired of seeing every deviation from an "average neurotypical" being diagnosed with a clinical condition by random internet people.

Can you share some of the symptoms of these conditions, and can those symptoms cause significant difficulties in your life without meeting the criteria for a diagnosis? Absolutely! I'm not trying to invalidate anyone's struggles here. I'm also not saying that the internet isn't a valuable tool for people seeking answers when something doesn't feel quite "right" or "normal." What I am saying is that these diagnoses have detailed, specific criteria, and cannot be properly diagnosed without help from a medical professional.

Yes, I'm aware that not everyone wants or is able to pursue a clinical diagnosis. That's fine (unless their inability stems from poor access to healthcare/systemic disadvantages, which is obviously very un-fine). I suspected I was autistic for years before I got my diagnosis, and I was frequently using resources for autistic people.

Saying "I believe I have undiagnosed X" shouldn't make you any less welcome in spaces for X than people with Official Diagnoses™️. Anyone who isn't a massive shitstain will help you get what you need.

That being said, that doesn't change the fact that seeing a list of symptoms/traits online and thinking "hey, that sounds like me!" still isn't the same as a diagnosis. Please stop trying to diagnose medical disorders online, especially for someone else.

[thalassic-p4rk]

My catsona! It is 1am I do not have energy to elaborate further rn. I get up for work in like 5 hours.

Ngl I have no clue what this looks like my vision went out when I started the background 2 hours ago. I am heavily relying autocorrect rn I cannot see for shit.

Inspired by this bitch <3:

[yuga2000]

"Unhappy kids turn to unhealthy habits"

[loislaina]

one thing i find people rarely talk about regarding trauma is how utterly *old* it makes you feel. im 34 and mentally/emotionally i feel like im a thousand years old most days. (other days i feel like a tall child but that's probably beause the trauma happened in childhood, my inner child acting out the past or whatever). physically i have very little energy, and almost zero motivation. there are days when i don't eat or sleep or even go to the bathroom unless i really need to. these symptoms have gotten better as ive healed but im still not up to a hundred percent, and there's no way i'll ever be the same person as before. but that last part is okay, because being alive means inherent change, and we all change as we grow... its just that some of us change in more severe ways sometimes

[kucherovv]

college summer break is kind of just school assigned rumination time. like enjoy 4 months off to do fuckall and spend hours thinking about your trauma

[moodr1ng]

recently been seeing (and seeking) more info on moral ocd and its like wellll it does seem like i definitely have that but talking about the stuff i obsess over w my psychiatrist feels impossible bc i cant admit to thinking about it without feeling like a horrible person, so im just gonna keep sweeping it under the rug lol....

[roseapprentice]

ugh, I listened to the podcast "Fur & Loathing," and it was a terrible, terrible mistake

I'm so mad at this podcast. It spends 5 episodes lulling you into a sense of trust and security by investigating the furry fandom with real curiosity and respect

And then the final episode is a sharp heel turn into ableist vilification

Like, "Look, this guy is clearly guilty because he's exibiting symptoms of PTSD from being repeatedly questioned by police! He even says weird stuff when we spend hours pushing him far past his stated boundaries and he starts dissociating. Clearly a terrorist!"

I'm not saying the guy they accused didn't do it. It sounds like he probably did, for all the same reasons he was the main suspect for years.

I even get not having much sympathy for the suspect. By the show's account he's a mean, vindictive, nazi-flavored troll.

But if you're going to report about someone through the lense of their mental illness, you take up a responsibility to at least handle that illness with some modicum of respect. Disgusted pity is not a valid substitute. The podcast's closing arguments were mostly just reframing evidence of trauma as evidence of guilt.

This show actually had me fooled that it was trying to be responsible journalism, and then it went full true crime genre gross. In a way that's super triggering for anyone who's experienced ableist gaslighting.

(*cough cough* Just any old hypothetical person.)

They didn't even have disclaimers in the body of the show saying not to harass the guy. And the host goes on about his years of experience doing journalism about internet communities, so he has no excuse for that oversight.

I'm so, so pissed.

[astriiformes]

[sighing] The demon won today.

[anglerflsh]

How did you find out about the autism?

My dad told me that his psychiatrist said he was autistic (and also me by extension), when I was around 17/18. Kinda sucked that the psychiatrist later told me he would have never told me.

I really didn't like him lol.

I met a group of people that were professionally diagnosed when I was in England and after two weeks of knowing me they asked if I knew I was autistic

I've done decently extensive research on autism + a lot of my family members have shown the same non-neurotypical traits as I have. I wouldn't say I have it just based on that happening lol. I'm not in a space where I could get a professional diagnosys yet

[crippled-native]

I have made good progress with my unilateral vestibular hypofunction flareup and am able to read a bit again so I’m diving headfirst into hEDs research and documenting my symptoms!

[bvtchcas]

im sure it has been said before but the thing is i genuinely would absolutely love a prequel about john and mary if it was done the way i want

heaven's breeding program for making vessels is one of the most horrifying things in the show, and it's just mentioned so briefly but just completely recontextualises everything!

I would love to see a show about Mary and John meeting and just like. not really getting on. not hating each other necessarily, but not liking each other either. And then circumstances just keep pushing each other together and that forced intimacy ends up exacerbating things so that not liking each other turns into more active dislike

and then, suddenly, theyre in love! they love each other so so much and its amazing and isnt it so funny how they used to not be able to stand each other at first but now theyre so in love?

and its like that thing where ppl fall out of love for the same reasons they fall into it, their quirks that were endearing becoming insufferable, but the opposite! except also not, because even tho they love each other now (they love each other so so much!) they still dont really like each other

but no matter how much they piss each other off sometimes, they still cant keep away from each other- they get married, have kids, build a life together. and they keep fighting, they cant stand each other, they drive each other crazy, they each keep trying to escape, but neither of them can stay away, they keep coming back. no matter how much it hurts them both to be together, resentment constant, inability to get along, they just cant let go because they just love each other so much!

and then mary dies and its the worst thing that could happen to john, its heartbreaking, its tragic, the love of his life is gone, but his love for her isnt. he still cant let go, it hurts so bad and he misses her so much and he needs to do something, anything to put her memory to rest.

he is tortured by the loss of her, hes brokenhearted, hes obsessed, hes still in love with nowhere to direct it. he never even liked her.

[seagullcharmer]

still feeling unwell abt leonard vanderboom btw. if you even care

[verved]

New therapist agrees w my suspicions of The Tism so that's a weight off my shoulders. I've been brushed off in therapy so much and it's nice to actually have someone agree w my anxieties and be realistic that my situation does indeed suck and we will focus on what we can instead of telling me to set impossibly abled goals.