#but then again i think some of them are too extreme to be that?? | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

miniseokminnies · 2 days ago

Text

waste a moment —- w.jh

❅ pairing: wen junhui x gn!reader ❅ theme: fluff, strangers to lovers ❅ w/c: 5k ❅ warnings: mentions of food, stressful work environment, mentions of death (not plot relevant) ❅ a/n: written as part of the Winter with You collab put on by @camandemstudios - make sure to check out the full collab masterlist here!! every writer involved is so extremely talented! send over some love! shout out to @tusswrites and @haologram for keeping me sane and beta reading! ❅ tags: @ylangelegy, @gyubakeries, @seungkw1, @myhimbomingi, @crab-ranjun, @heechwe

The only sound you can hear is your own steps on the pavement as you run to your bus stop, you are late, so late. You knew the ninth time hitting snooze this morning was too many, but of course, you did it anyway. The weather outside is slowly getting colder and gloomier as the world prepares for autumn to come, so what could a few more moments in your warm bed hurt?

As it turns out, your feet, the concrete was unforgiving and your flat-soled shoes provided little cushioning. Pushing the last few blocks to your stop your lungs were starting to burn, running was not typically something you took joy in. Rounding the corner, something felt out of place.

The early morning haze was interrupted by the glow of a neon “open” sign affixed to the window of the only permanent building near the bus stop shelter. This building never stood out to you, it was always quiet and dark when you got on and off the bus. Every morning and every evening, without fail whoever owned the building got there after you and left before you. The smell of spices wafted out of the door and almost made you stop before you realized this all meant that you were even later than you thought you were. The bus you usually take was long gone by now and you didn’t even know the schedule well enough to know when the next one would arrive.

Sighing, you accepted your fate and moved toward the shelter and squatted in front of where the stray cats always play. A small orange kitten was playing with the weeds growing out from the cracks in the sidewalk. You reached out to pet him, and as soon as his attention settled on you, he flopped to the side and tried to playfully bite your fingers as you wiggled them.

You heard the bus approach the kitten trotted away toward the restaurant. Once settled in your seat on the bus you check your watch, 7:45 am and still another 15 minute bus ride to work. You sigh and prepare yourself for the reprimand you will surely get once you arrive.

“You’re late.”

“I know, I’m so sorry, Ms. Lee,” you bowed your head apologetically, “I missed the first bus…I had to wait for the next one.” Ms. Lee, the head nurse of your unit, swiveled around in her chair.

“Well, you could have called,” she gestured to the phone at the nurse’s station, “Eunbi had to stay after her night shift to cover for you.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Just don’t let it happen again,” she stood up from her chair, “Get changed,” she began to walk away and turned back to you briefly, “Oh, and Y/N?” You nodded, “I’m sure you won’t mind staying late tonight to even out the shifts for Eunbi, hm?”

“Of course not,” you muttered, a certain dread settled in your stomach as you walked to the nurse’s changing room. By staying late tonight you will run into the same problem you had this morning. You don’t know the next bus after your usual one. You shuffled into the room and caught sight of Eunbi slipping into her coat.

“Good morning, Y/N!” She smiled at you.

“Eunbi, I’m so sorry for making you stay late!” You slumped against your locker, “it was a total accident I missed my bus and-”

“Woah!” She laughed and reached out to smooth her hands over your arms. “It’s totally okay, it happens, you’ve covered for me before.”

“It’s just that…Ms. Lee,” you started.

“She’s a crotchety old bat,” she rolled her eyes. “We all think so, no one else here is mad at you.”

“Thank you,” you let go of a breath you didn’t know you were holding in, “but I’m still covering the first 45 minutes of your shift tonight, don’t try to tell me no.”

“Alright, alright, see you at shift change.” She smiled and squeezed your arms before leaving you alone in the quiet room. After changing as quickly as possible you made your way back to the nurse’s station to catch up on what you missed.

“Mr. Kang in 304 has been looking for you all morning,” Ms. Lee informed you as she pushed his file into your hand, “he will only take his medication from you if you could help him right away.”

Your knock on the door of room 304 echoed down the hallway. It was still early so the quiet of a hospital before a day begins was generally still intact. You pushed through the door to see Mr. Kang propped up on his pillows, smiling at you.

Mr. Kang has been in your care since you started at this hospital a few months ago. You work in the long term care unit, so it isn’t uncommon for patients to form attachments to nurses here. He was an old man, probably old enough to be your grandpa, who became a widower years ago. A week or so before you started here he had a terrible fall at home, breaking his hip.

“Good morning Mr. Kang!” You mustered a smile.

“Good morning, Y/N.” He smiled softly and attempted to sit up straighter. You moved to his side quickly to help him with the pillows.

“So,” you sat in the chair near his bed when he was settled, “I hear you aren’t taking your pills from Ms. Lee or Eunbi?”

“Is that what Ms. Lee said?” He chuckled, “it’s not that I won't, it's just that I’m used to it being you in the morning, and when it’s not, I have trouble.”

“Be that as it may, you still need your medication, Mr. Kang.” You informed him before moving to retrieve the medication.

“It’s a bit late now,” he started, you sighed thinking he was going to try and get out of taking the medication, “but could you take me to the big windows to watch the rest of the sunrise?”

“Tell you what,” you begin to divide the pills into small cups, “take your pills, no complaints, and I’ll take you.” Mr. Kang eagerly agreed. You helped him into his wheelchair and the two of you made the short trek to the back of the wing where the big windows were.

Mr. Kang told you about how he and his wife used to watch the sunset every Saturday morning while they ate breakfast together. These mornings were the highlight of his week, he was so happy to just have moments with his wife where time didn’t matter, just the two of them. Every time he tells you this story, or something similar about his wife, you are struck with the fact that you never have the time to do anything like this. Since graduating nursing school your life has been scheduled out to the minute. This morning at the bus stop was the first time in months that you felt the urge to go against that schedule.

“It’s going to snow soon,” Mr. Kang pulled you out of your thoughts. He pointed a crooked finger at the dark clouds overhead. “Be careful going home tonight, I remember how unreliable those buses can be.”

The cold winter air stung your cheeks and whipped your hair. Mr. Kang was right, it would snow today, the day you had to stay late and miss your bus. Because of the weather the buses weren’t running on schedule, you waited for almost an hour at the bus stop and no one ever came. You had to walk home.

The snow swirled around you and made it difficult to see, you knew that you were almost home, or at least, it felt that way. You were soaked and freezing to the bone, you’d be lucky if you woke up with just a cold tomorrow. Just as the shelter of your bus stop was starting to materialize through the snow you felt your foot catch the curb in front of you. You attempted to catch yourself but there was no use, you were falling. When you open your eyes to assess the situation you realize you fell into an alleyway and were lying on the ground staring up at a few trash cans.

Just as you decided that maybe you should just lay here and die, you hear the door of the building to your left open. A man is yelling in a language you don’t understand, is he yelling at you? Before you had any time to think about that you felt a hand on the back of your coat, pulling you up off the ground.

“Oh,” the man blinked down at you, “it’s you.” With that he pulled you inside. He placed you in a corner near the front door. “Stay there.” He instructed you and held his hands out as if he was taming a wild animal. He backed away from you slowly for several steps then turned on his heel and ran into a back room. You heard him rifling through things for several minutes.

Beyond that the only sounds in the small room were the dripping of melted snow off your coat and on to the floor. You took in your surroundings, slowly dethawing. The room was actually a small restaurant, with tables crammed into the small space. The room the man disappeared into was near the kitchen, judging by the location of the window behind the counter.

“You must be freezing,” he emerged from the room with a stack of clothes, “why didn’t you take the bus in this weather?” He was scolding you like you were best friends for years.

“I’m sorry? Do we know each other?”

“No, not really,” he blinked at you.

“Then…” you searched his face.

“You get on the bus when I get off,” he stated as if it was the most obvious thing in the world, “and in the evenings, you get off the bus when I get on.” He held the clothes out to you again, as if to remind you why you’re in his restaurant. “You’re dripping on my floor.” He mumbled.

“Oh!” You gasped and began searching for a place to hang your coat. He placed the stack of clothes on a nearby table and helped you out of your coat.

“Take them,” he gestured to the clothes with his elbow, “the bathroom is back near the kitchen, change and warm up.” You nodded at the strange man’s kindness and headed to the bathroom to change.

You peeled your wet clothes away from your skin, grateful to be rid of them. In the kitchen you heard pots and pans clanging and soon there was a spicy aroma engulfing the entire building. Once you were ready you walked back into the main dining area. The clothes he lent you were far too big for you, the sweatpants were dragging on the floor and you felt like you were swimming in the oversized hoodie, but you were thankful to be warm.

“Have a seat anywhere!” He called through the window from the kitchen, “it’s almost ready!” You had no idea what he was making or why but you would be thankful for a warm meal after the day you had. The chair scraped across the floor of the otherwise quiet restaurant. Now that you could feel your toes you took another look around the space. The neon sign that you remembered from this morning was turned off, and the windows had their blinds closed. It was like the entire building was shut off from the outside world. Seeing it this way from inside was strange, as it usually was buttoned up like this when you saw it waiting for the bus. Which would make sense, you realized, if what he said was true, that you were on the opposite side of the bus schedule on a normal day.

“I made soup,” he emerged from the kitchen carrying a tray with two bowls. He sat the tray on the table in front of you and contemplated sitting down for a few seconds too long for someone who made two bowls, clearly for the both of you. Finally, he plopped into the chair across from you and passed you a spoon. He moved one of the bowls from the tray so it was in front of him. You watched as he took a large spoonful, blew on it lightly, and popped it into his mouth. His eyes closed and he was obviously proud of the dish.

Suddenly, his eyes snapped open and he stared at you. “Do you like spice?” he asked around the soup in his mouth, sounding muffled and panicked. You couldn’t help it, you burst out laughing. His eyes grew wider than you had seen them all night and he swallowed his mouthful.

“I’m so sorry,” you tried to control the giggling, “yes I’m fine with spice. Is this spicy?”

“Oh, yes,” he nodded enthusiastically, “it’s called Hulatang which literally means peppery and spicy soup. It’ll clear your sinuses.”

“You didn’t poison it, right?”

“What?” He looked at you bewildered.

“Well, you picked me up out of the trash,” you bring your spoon to your lips, “and I don’t even know your name.” You put the spoon in your mouth. The flavor blossoms on your tongue.

“Junhui”

“Okay, Junhui.” You nod, “can I have a glass of water?” He scrambled behind the counter to find a glass. He returned quickly.

“Is it too much?” He asked, sitting back down, “I handle spice well, so I can’t tell.”

“No, no,” you sipped your water, “it’s good, so good.” He smiled and went back to his meal. The two of you ate in silence until the bowls were empty and you felt warm from the spicy broth.

“I thought you were a raccoon earlier.” He blurted out of the blue as he was clearing the dishes from the table. “The raccoons always get in my trash, I was surprised they would be out in this weather though.” He continued, “I do worry about the cats though…”

“First snow of the year, and it’s brutal,” you agreed, “wait, you’re the one who feeds the cats!” You exclaim over the sound of the water turning on. You follow him back to the kitchen so you wouldn’t have to yell.

“Yeah?” He doesn’t look up from his task, “if I didn’t, who would?” He moved the pot he used to make the soup into the sink. You smiled to yourself, remembering the kitten you played with this morning.

“How long have you been feeding them?” You asked, helping him move glasses from the side into the sink. He smiled at you.

“Since I started renting this building,” he thought for a moment, “Almost three years ago.”

“That long?” You gasped, “I’ve only been living in my apartment near here for a few months. I just graduated nursing school and I got a job at the hospital.”

“Oh I live near there,” he nodded, knowing exactly where you were talking about, “we live near each other’s work places.” He pointed out.

“Suppose we do,” you smiled.

“What’s your name?” He asked, turning off the sink.

“Oh my God,” you blushed realizing you never told him, “Y/N.”

“Y/N.” He repeated softly as if tasting the new information on his tongue.

It has been four days since you met Junhui at his restaurant. You made sure to look for him while getting on and off the bus. He always smiled at you, no time to talk so smiles do just fine. You never did get the chance to ask him why he was still out that night.

You rolled over in bed and checked your phone. It was 10:40 am on your day off and you couldn’t stop thinking about the man who runs the restaurant down the street. It would be lunch time soon, maybe you could convince yourself to make the short trip over. To eat, certainly not to see him again.

Without a second thought you were out of bed and fixing your hair in the mirror. Once satisfied with how you looked, you threw on your coat and went out the door. The walk to your bus stop is short and relatively easy. The weather today was much nicer than the last time you found yourself inside Junhui’s restaurant.

The bell above the door twinkled at your entrance. You shifted awkwardly at the entrance of the building as the only other patron shot you curious glances.

“One moment!” You heard Junhui call from the kitchen. Soon, he appeared from the kitchen holding a tray similar to the one he brought your soup on a few days prior. He stumbled and almost dropped the tray when he saw you in the doorway. The other man in the room laughed and said something teasingly in a language you didn’t understand. Junhui glared at the man and then glanced back at you. “Y/N, do you speak Mandarin?” As soon as you confirmed that, no you do not, Junhui was uttering what you could only assume were curses at the other man. He set the plates of food on the table. “You can have a seat wherever you like, I’ll be right with you!” He smiled at you.

You selected a table near the kitchen, the other man was at a table near the only window in the building. The two of them continued to bicker in Mandarin for a few minutes. You smiled to yourself, Junhui seemed close with him. Eventually, he broke away, and made his way to your table.

“Hi,” you smiled at him.

“Hi,” his lips broke into a small smile, “I’m sorry about him, he’s my best friend, we’ve known each other for ages.”

“No worries,” you assured him.

“What can I get you?” He bounced awkwardly on the balls of his feet. He looked less tired today, his eyes were bright and his dark hair was tucked up into a beanie. You eyed the menu he still had tucked under his arm. “Oh!” He scrambled to grab it and all but threw it down on the table in front of you.

“Any recommendations?” You asked, scanning the menu full of dishes. He took a deep breath and sat down across from you. He started in on an explanation of the menu. You struggled to listen to everything he had to say because you were busy admiring him. He was so passionate about his recipes and the food he got to make.

“This one is my grandma’s recipe,” he pointed to an item on the menu and looked up at you with expectant eyes. “It’s ground pork and egg basically.”

“Oh yes, that sounds lovely,” you smile at him. “Tell me how to pronounce it so I can ask for it by name next time.”

“Xiándàn zhēng ròubǐng,” he collects the menu and practically skips back to the kitchen with the promise of you coming back again. You watched him go until he disappeared then you pulled out your phone to pass the time.

“I’m Minghao by the way,” you looked up to see Junhui’s friend standing in front of you. “I’ve heard a lot about you, I hope you keep coming around to keep him company.” He smiled at you before shouting Junhui’s name and telling him something in Mandarin. Junhui responded from the back and with that Minghao knocked twice on your table and turned to leave.

About ten minutes later, Junhui reemerged to clear Minghao’s table. He began clearing it of the dishes left behind.

“Did he bother you?” He asked as he passed your table with dishes stacked in his hands.

“Oh, no!” You assured him, “he just introduced himself.” You conveniently omitted the part about Minghao letting you know that Junhui had been talking about you.

“Oh, good,” he nodded, “your meal should be ready in about ten minutes, I’ll be back then.”

As promised he returned with the food you ordered and a glass of water. He set the food on the table and sat in the chair across from you. “Taste,” he told you, he could hardly contain the giddiness he felt. It was bubbling in his chest and he bounced his knee under the table to expel some of the extra energy he felt.

“Have you eaten?” You asked, picking up your spoon.

“Hm?” He blinked, “oh, no, not yet.”

“Get a spoon,” you pointed toward the counter, “we’ll share.” He smiled widely at you and quickly retrieved a spoon. The two of you split the meal, getting to know each other as you ate. You told him all about your job at the hospital and your trouble with Ms. Lee. Junhui made a disapproving noise when you told him about what happened on the day you showed up in his trash.

“She sounds horrible,” he mumbled around a mouthful of rice.

“She is!” You threw your hands up, “we all think so, even Eunbi, who is the nicest person there.”

In turn Junhui told you about how he ended up owning a restaurant at a bus stop thousands of miles from where he was raised. He was feeling stuck in the monotony of his job, which he found extremely boring, in China. So he set out to find something new and he ended up here. He tried finding a job but ultimately decided to open up this restaurant which is like a tiny slice of home for him.

The bell above the door rang out, ultimately stopping your conversation. Junhui looked up at the customer now standing in his restaurant. He shot you an apologetic look, to which you shook your head and shooed him away so he could take care of the woman.

He greeted her as you began to stack the dishes up for him. You gave a small wave as he was getting her seated. He glanced at you and held up a finger, as if to ask you to hold on for a moment. After the woman is settled in he jogs back to the room near the kitchen and comes back with his phone clutched in his hand.

“Not to be weird,” he smiled sheepishly, “but could I maybe get your number? I’d like to continue talking to you.”

Over the last week Junhui texted you a few times, mostly to send pictures of the cats. Every so often the two of you would update each other on how things are going. On one occasion Junhui requested you come retrieve leftovers from him on your day off so you had lunch for the following day.

You placed said leftovers in the microwave of the staff lounge, you felt your phone buzz in the pocket of your scrubs as you set the time. You were taking lunch later than usual today so you figured it was Junhui checking in on how the food reheated after he finished up the lunch rush. The screen lit up with text messages and notifications as you pulled it out.

Junhui: today sux

Junhui: this guy just came in DURING A RUSH and screamed at me that there wasn’t a table

Junhui: i hope the congee tasted okay reheated

Junhui: can’t talk more. people are the worst!! 😾

The microwave beeps, making you jump. You opened the door and sighed, you knew that there were bound to be days where things got to be too much for him. You were no stranger to bad days, even when you’re passionate about what you were doing. It was one of those days when you met Junhui, you knew how he felt.

As soon as your shift was over you were flying out the door. You wanted to make it to the convenience store on the corner before your bus came. Your left shoe felt like it was coming untied but you didn’t stop to check, no time. Filling your arms with jelly snacks, ramen, and a few drinks you made your way to the checkout.

You made it to the bus stop with your haul as the bus was arriving. Letting out a sigh of relief you paid your fare and found a spot to sit. Feeling a buzz in your pocket you pull out your phone once more.

Junhui: if i see another person today i might lose it

Junhui: [Attachment: 1 Image]

You smiled at the picture, it was taken from the window of Junhui’s restaurant. The neon sign is shut off and the blinds are drawn already. Perfect, this meant that he was more than likely waiting for the bus already. You could just grab him and drag him back inside.

Junhui was not at the bus stop. You walk to the front door and turn the knob, it was unlocked. His forehead was resting on the counter, he looked silly hunched over it like that. He let out an annoyed groan hearing the bell above the door.

“I’m closed,” he mumbled against the counter. When he didn’t hear you leave he snapped his head up, “I said I��oh, hi.” His tone softened immediately when he saw you standing there with a plastic sack held out in front of you.

“Hi,” you hazarded a few steps toward him, “is it safe? Or are you gonna bite my head off?”

“I’m sorry,” he chuckled airily, “it has been…a day.”

“I know,” you nodded, “I come bearing gifts.” You hold up the sack again, as a peace offering. He held out his hands, looking slightly childlike.

“Show me the haul.” The two of you go through the small store bought feast in the bag. Once he saw the cup ramen at the bottom he trotted to the kitchen to put some water on the stove to boil.

You set aside two sets of chopsticks as Junhui plopped the noodles into the pot. He told you all about the people he saw today and about while he was grateful for the business some people could just be so draining. You agreed, you loved your job but some patients were just too much to handle at times.

You watched as he tore open the flavoring packets with his teeth. He sprinkled it over the noodles in the pot, but you were still fixated on his full lips. You know that Junhui is handsome, it’s hard to miss. But should you have been staring so intently? Probably not, right?

That was what you thought until he turned and held your gaze for several moments. He seemed to be just as frozen as you were, his eyes flicked to your lips and for a second you swore he was going to kiss you.

“Ramen’s done,” he said, barely above a whisper.

The day had been uneventful. Your job was monotonous and boring, and to make matters worse you hadn’t heard from Junhui in several days. You still saw him smiling at you from the bus stop but he seemed like he had been avoiding having a real conversation with you since that day you thought he might kiss you.

You watched the city speed by out the window of the bus and wondered if you had done something wrong. Did you read him wrong? Maybe he didn’t like you at all, you’re just some weird person that showed up in his trash one day. That day wasn’t all that different from today, it was snowing again. You were surprised that there was this much time between the first and second snow this year.

Your fingers wrapped around the cord as you alerted the driver that your stop was up next. You gathered your things and prepared for the cold walk from your stop to your apartment. Junhui was standing in front of the bus stop shelter, you knew it was him by his height and the way he shrank into himself to look at his phone. The blue light caught his features in a way that made him look almost dreamlike. The brakes on the bus squealed to a stop, making him look up from his phone.

You expected him to brush you off with a smile, just as he had every day for the last week. However, he just stood there, waiting, until the moment your feet hit the ground in front of him.

“Happy second snow!” He beamed at you. You smiled up at him, just happy that he was talking to you. “I’m sorry about the other day.”

“For what?” The bus stop was clearing out quickly, no one was worried about whatever reconciliation was happening between the two of you.

“I didn’t kiss you when I should have.” He stated plainly as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. He moved closer to you and cupped your cold cheeks in his warm hands. Soon his mouth was on yours and you felt so warm that it could easily have been summer. He somehow made all of the ice melt away and it was just the two of you in the world for this moment. You wrapped your arms around his waist in an effort to bring him closer.

He broke away from you and searched your face, “Date me?” He breathed.

“Date you?” You whispered, your breath turning into fog that he breathed in as he connected your lips to his once again. This kiss was more urgent, like he was trying to convince you to say yes.

“Yes, me.” He mumbled against your mouth, “please?”

“Like right now?” You reach up to kiss him again. He hummed into your kiss.

“Like right now, tomorrow, for the rest of your life if you’ll have me,” he swept his tongue across your bottom lip, which made you shiver. You accept his tongue into your mouth for only a second before he breaks away again. “Was that too forward? I just really like you.”

“No, it was cute.” You assure him. A blush crept across his cheeks, already pink from the cold.

“Cool,” he grinned, “So?”

“Oh sure,” you rolled your eyes, “but could we maybe date inside, I’m getting cold.” He grabbed your hand and tangled his fingers with yours. He began to drag you back toward the restaurant where this all started.

“Yeah, come on,” he looked back at you, “I made soup.”

#svthub #diamond life network #winter with you collab #wen junhui x reader #wen junhui fluff #wen junhui imagines #jun x reader #jun imagines #jun fluff #seventeen x reader #svt fluff #svt imagines #seventeen fics #seventeen imagines #moon junhui x reader #moon junhui imagines #seventeen scenarios #seventeen jun #bennie’s works

71 notes · View notes

musings-of-a-rose · 3 days ago

Note

Could I request Benny x female reader where they engage in mutual masturbation and they make out throughout?

Touch

Pairing: Benny Miller x best friend f!reader

Word Count: 1900+

Rating: Mature - 18+ ONLY!

Warnings: Just like ao3, “creator chooses not to use warnings.” If you click Keep Reading, that means you agree that you’re the age to handle mature themes. Also by clicking Keep Reading, you understand warnings may not be complete in order to avoid spoilers for the story.

Notes: Listen. This was a hot ask. I'll admit, I had to think on this one a bit (and that was mostly staring at the wall). A huge thanks to @mermaidxatxheart as usual for listening to my Ted Talks and insecurities.

**If you want to be added to the taglist, join here or let me know!

❤If you enjoy the fic, please consider giving me a warm beverage! (It is not required in any way!)

→Tell Tumblr this should be shared with others by reblogging! That's what the algorithm loves (it's how it works here. I don't make the rules!)

**Reader is not described

Main Masterlist

Benny Miller Masterlist

“The date went bad I take it?” Benny’s eyebrows are raised as he motions for me to come inside his apartment. He closes the door behind me as I huff.

“He kept taking out his phone and texting. His mom. He was giving her a play by play of our date.”

Benny chuckled. “What? During your date?”

I kick off my heels and set them on his shoe mat. “I’m all for strong family bonds, but maybe wait until after the date? I could barely talk to him. It was literally every 2 minutes.”

Benny chuckled again. “Well I’m sorry it sucked. You’re welcome to come finish this terrible movie I’m watching.”

I follow Benny to his couch, plopping down next to him. We’d been best friends for years. He was always someone I could count on to be there for me, good or bad. He never judged or questioned me, but somehow always seemed to have an answer to my problems. He hands me a drink and offers me some popcorn from the giant bowl in his lap. I grab a handful and watch whatever b horror movie is on the tv.

“Ugh even the ugly ass monster in this bad movie is getting laid why can’t I?”

Benny coughs, choking a little on his popcorn. “What?”

Fuck, I said that out loud.

“I uh…nothing.”

He takes a swig from his drink, clearing the last of the popcorn. “Afraid no one will touch you again?”

I groan, but I’m also desperate for advice. “No. Well…maybe. It’s not even sex. I just want someone to touch me again. Someone that’s not me or Henry Cavill.”

Benny laughs, his head flying back. “You know Henry Cavill?”

I can feel the heat on my cheeks, but I’ve already said it. “That’s…that’s the name of my vibrator.” His laughter is contagious and I can’t stop myself from smiling. He makes some quips about it and then something happens in the movie that captures our attention.

“I can help you with that if you’d like.”

My head snaps in his direction. “What?” Did he just offer to…surely not.

He turns his head, his bright blue eyes boring into mine, a sparkle in them. “I can help you with your problem.”

Heat burns my cheeks and I’m grasping at words. Surely he doesn’t mean…he can’t…without thinking, I glance down at his hands, the grip on his bottle, and how small it looks in them. I swallow hard.

“Ben, be serious.”

He leans forward, the muscles in his arms flexing slightly as he places his bottle on the coffee table before sitting back, casually laying an arm across the back of the couch as if he didn’t just suggest shoving his hand down my pants.

“I’m serious, sweetheart. Look, you’ve had a really rough go of it. And I would make sure you were taken care of. You’re too pent up. Let some steam out.”

I shift slightly in my seat, which doesn’t go unnoticed by him. It’s not that I’ve never thought about it. Benny is extremely attractive. I just never would ever think he’d be ok with that with me. For me? I can’t even think.

“Ben…I can’t lose your friendship. That would break me.”

He extends a long finger from the hand that’s across the back of the couch and pokes my head. “Do you think I’d ever let that happen?”

I swat at his hand out of reflex. “Is that something we could control though?”

He thinks for a moment. “It’s us. We’re best friends. We take care of each other. I think we’d be fine.”

“But what if it changes everything?”

He takes my hand in his large one, completely engulfing me. He looks into my eyes and does that thing where his eyebrows pull together and makes me melt. “I promise to not let it change the way I feel about you. Do you promise?”

Could I make that promise? The not-so-minor crush I’ve harbored for him for years is begging. Your feelings won’t change because you already like him.

“How would…I mean, what would you…”

Benny shifts to face me better. “I’d touch you however you need me to. Maybe make out a little bit if you need to be distracted.”

I press my thighs together, hoping that he didn’t notice. But judging by the way he shifts and his eyes darken slightly, I think he very much noticed. Pressing my thighs together did nothing to quell the heat, my body begging me to just let me be touched. I feel safe with Benny and I know he’d never cross a line. My skin is hot thinking about it and I finally cave, promising myself that we’d still be friends. Just friends that gave each other a hand sometimes.

Before I can talk myself out of it, I nod, moving to undo the button on my pants. Benny reaches out and stills my hand with his own and I look up at him.

“I need you to say it out loud, sweetheart.”

I swallow hard, trying my best to give him eye contact. Were his eyes always so blue?

“Y-yes.”

“Yes, what? I need specifics.”

I let out a huff and this fucker chuckles. “Touch me, Benny. I..want you to touch me.”

Benny scoots closer to me on the couch, his leg pressed against mine. His large hand cups my cheek as he dips his head close to mine, his breath puffing out over my face, fanning the anticipatory fire between my thighs. “Can I kiss you?” he whispers.

“Yes.”

I barely get it out before his lips are on mine, soft but guiding, his tongue gently probing at my lips. I open them and his tongue slides inside my mouth, gracefully dancing with my own as he moans slightly into me. Both of his hands are on my face now, cupping my cheeks as he continues to kiss me. Then one moves to the back of my head, slightly gripping my hair as he tips my head back, exposing my neck to him. I gasp as his teeth skirt along my skin, gently nipping and kissing along my pulse point. The hand that isn’t entangled in my hair starts to glide down my body, barely even fumbling as he unbuttons my pants. But he doesn’t touch me. Not yet. Over my jeans, he caresses my inner thighs as I spread my legs, tracing the line where my underwear sits, up and down, up and down, driving me mad. My heart is racing, pounding against my ears. I feel him pause just above my mound and I want to cry.

“Can you slide your pants off for me?” He breathes into my ear. My hands fumble as I try to shove and kick my pants off, ignoring the smirk on Benny’s face as the pants land somewhere across the room.

“Panties too. Promise I won’t look.” He covers his face, a large gap between his fingers where his eye is obviously looking out.

“Don’t you need to see?”

He closes the gap in his fingers but keeps his eyes covered. “Nope. Your sounds will guide me to where I need to be.”

Fuck. Me.

I toss my underwear somewhere by my pants. “Ok I’m-”

I have no time to think because he’s back on me, kissing me hard, like he’s never needed anything so bad. My fingers tangle in his hair, the cool air from his apartment hitting my bare skin, but I don’t care. Benny’s large hand is on my inner thighs again, tracing circles, but also pushing them open. I keep them where he leaves them, my body practically shaking with anticipation.

One long finger slides down me and I jolt, my thighs trying to close, but he pushes them back open before resuming his touch. He slides all the way down to my entrance, gently tracing circles there and I gasp, my eyes still closed as I let myself get lost in his touch. Our foreheads are pressed together, his own breaths coming out a little more ragged as he drags his dampened finger back up me, pausing when my legs jump. He takes his time at this spot, small circles across my clit, fast and slow, fast and slow, my breaths coming out in small, fast pants.

He slows his movements, gently pushing a finger inside me. I moan, louder as he pulls out and adds a second finger, curling them inside of me as he moves them in and out. One spot has me gasping his name and that’s where he stays, curling and rubbing inside of me as his thumb resumes circling my clit, slow and fast, gentle and harder, the pressure building quick and fast. I grip his wrist and he stills.

“Can I touch you? I want you to come with me.”

He nods and I move my hand over and undo his button, sliding his zipper down gently. He’s already hard, straining against his boxers. I lower them enough for him to spring free and he grunts. I grip his wrist again and pull his hand out of me with a whimper, but then slide him back in and out, fucking myself with his hand a few times as he moans in my ear. Then I take his wet hand and rub it against my palm, dropping his hand back on me before gripping him with my slicked hand. He whimpers, swearing under his breath before he pushes his fingers inside me again, immediately resuming the slow curling and rubbing, his thumb pressing gently on my clit. I slowly work him up and down, squeezing harder and softer, matching my pace to his. He kisses me hard but then breaks it, our foreheads pressed together as we pant and moan.

In some super move, he pushes me onto my back, his hand still firmly working me over, my legs spread wide as he settles between them, fucking his hips into my hand. His arm strains next to me as he holds himself up, curling his fingers a little deeper, swirling a little more and I can’t hold back anymore. I cum, his name tumbling from my lips in praise, my legs twitching as I pulse around his fingers. Another few presses of his hips and Benny grunts, small pants coming from him as he spills himself over my stomach, my shirt hiked up to my chest. We stay like that for several long moments, both of us trying to catch our breaths. His eyes open and meet mine, holding my gaze for a moment before he blinks, pulling his hand from me as he sits up. He tucks himself back in as he looks around, shrugs, then reaches behind him and pulls his shirt up and over his head. He drops his shirt on my cunt, using the sleeve to clean off my stomach, to hold up his promise of not looking. He glances down and picks up my underwear and pants, handing them to me as he turns his head away. I make sure I’m cleaned off before getting dressed, sitting back down on the couch, the movie still playing on in the background. Minutes pass in silence between us, my stomach twisting in knots with every passing second.

Benny clears his throat. “So…are we never talking about this again or can I finally take you on a date?”

My eyes snap up to him, his already on me. There’s no pressure here, he’d be ok if I said we’re never talking about it again. But that’s not what I want.

“Just so long as we can have dessert at home.”

General Taglist:

@frankie-catfish-morales @chaoticgeminate @janebby @astoryisaloveaffair @balekanemohafe

@greeneyedblondie44 @hoeforthefictional @marvelousmermaid @hauntedmama @icanbeyourjedi

@wretchedmo @sunnshineeexoxo @livingmydreams13 @adventures-of-a-noodle @sara-alonso

@theewokingdead @punkerthanpascal @giggly-otter @f0rever15elf @phandoz

@gallowsjoker @lovesbiggerthanpride @booksarekindaneat @charlispersonallyhell @xoxabs88xox

@amneris21 @gooddaykate @avengers-fixation @paintballkid711 @harriedandharassed

@ladykatakuri @practicalghost @withakindheartx @batdarkladyvampir @justanotherkpopstanlol

@mermaidxatxheart @alexxavicry @justreblogginfics @kmc1989 @veryprairieberry

@mysterious-moonstruck-musings @heartpascalispunk

#benny miller #ben miller #benny miller x reader #benny miller x you #benny miller x f!reader #triple frontier #garrett hedlund #benjamin miller #benjamin benny miller #garrett hedlund x reader #garrett hedlund x you #garrett hedlund characters #garrett hedlund character fanfic #garrett hedlund character ff #garrett hedlund character fanfiction

82 notes · View notes

this-lovely-universe · 6 hours ago

Text

Lore Drop: Maisie unknowningly ruins her life.

Tw: Maisie kinda gets drugged, death, disturbing living conditions found?, get bit and scratched (although it's not super gorey), Me generally putting my ocs through it

Also warning, this is far longer than my other lore drops. like triple the length.

“Well, that was a fun car ride.” Willa chuckled, locking the car.

“I mean, it was a nice nap.” Maisie yawned, rubbing her eyes. “You sure this is the right place? It’s like, the middle of the woods.”

Willa swung her car keys around her finger, before stuffing them in her pocket. “Sketchy ass organsiation, sketchy ass location.” She shrugged. “You got the USB?”

“That fills me with such joy that they have my personal information.” She sighed. “Yeah, I got it.” She held it inside her jacket pocket.

“Again, still don’t understand why they can’t tell you about your parents. Was this place like an NPC they couldn’t get past for your parentage?”

Maisie laughed. “NPC…” She wheezed.

Willa smiled at her, before grabbing her hand and pulling her along.

“How are we meant to get into this place again? I assume it’s pretty specky.”

“I honestly doubt it. The owner is like 120 or something crazy.”

Maisie’s eyebrows shot up. “120?”

Willa hummed. “Surprised he’s not dust yet.”

She laughed again. “Alright, back to my question. What’s the plan?”

“Well, I’m not really sure. I don’t exactly want to scare all the kids.”

“They’re in the building? I thought this would be some sort of headquarters….”

“Nope. Don’t think the dust man’s that rich.”

Maisie smacked her shoulder. “Stop. This is supposed to be serious.”

“Since when was I ever serious, Mae?” She smirked. “Serious is boring anyway. You want serious, you’d date someone else.”

“Ew.”

Willa laughed, pulling her closer and wrapping an arm around her. “Did you just ew the thought of dating anyone else?”

“What? Why’d I want to have anyone else when I have you?”

“Plenty of reasons…” She sighed as they stood in front of the building.

It looked straight out of 1901. It looked dirty, whatever colour brick was caked with dirt and mud and discoloured from the sun.

“What the fuck happened to this building? It looks like it got jumped…” Maisie muttered

“What god did this building piss off…” Willa muttered too.

“Looks like all of them. Every god to ever exist.”

Willa sighed, going up to the door. She stopped, looking around. “Can you see any cameras?”

“I wasn’t exactly looking for them. I thought you meant they wouldn’t have security cause of dust man.”

“I meant alarms.” Willa sighed, getting her phone out. “Can you look?”

Maisie rolled her eyes stepping back to get a good look at the building. “Your logic is extremely flawed.”

“Yeah, yeah.” She turned on her flashlight, shining it through the glass. “Maisie. Cameras?”

“Uh, I can’t see any… Let me check with my flashlight…” She pulled out a flashlight and turned it on. She shone it on the building walls.

It looked even worse in light. The brick was completely crackled and missing chunks on the edges. She didn’t trust this building to be very structurally sound.

“Well, no cameras, but this building doesn’t seem sturdy, if I’m honest.”

“Oh, great!” Willa replied sarcastically, before sighing. “Let’s check for a back entry.”

***

Look, Maisie couldn’t deny that Willa breaking into a building was kinda hot.

Either that or she was still kinda annoyed this cut into their makeout time.

The inside of the building was creepy as hell.

Firstly, it was modern. Like bizarrely modern. The building itself looked like it would be put on a historic landmark list but the inside was blindingly white, like a hospital.

Maisie swallowed, a wave of anxiety flooded her body. She didn’t like this. The building felt… off.

She stepped closer to Willa, taking her hand.

Willa squeezed it as she shivered. “Goosebumps…” She whispered.

Maisie nodded, before beginning to walk.

The further into the building they went, the worse the feeling got.

There was this low groaning, almost scream like. It sent shivers down Maisie’s spine. It was horrible, and brought tears to her eyes.

A part of her told her to grab Willa and run. To get the hell out of there before something terrible happened, but the other part, the far larger part, was itching to know what happened to her parents.

Did they die? Could they just not look after her? Did they not want her? The questions were endless, and she just needed to know.

She swallowed, as they turned a corner. The groaning got louder.

“I don’t like this.” Willa whispered.

Maisie went to agree when they saw a computer.

She has never seen Willa move faster. Literally, it was like she teleported there.

“Come on. We finally have it.” She went to turn it on.

“Wait, stop. Don’t turn it on.” She went over.

Willa raised her hands away from the button.

Maisie looked at it. It was dusty, extremely. “It’s a trap.”

“What?” She looked at her exasperatedly.

“A) There’s no chair, but this isn’t a standing desk. That’s extremely uncomfortable. B) It’s really dusty. Sure, dust isn’t exactly something you blink an eye at, but it’s on the keyboard. The front door’s right there; if some were to break in and want information, well, like us, they’d go for the first computer they find.”

Willa continued to stare. “Holy fuck, that was hot.”

She smacked her shoulder. “Shut up. We need to find the actual computer. Now, perferly. This place is even creepier on the inside.”

***

The building was like a maze. The chances are high that was done on purpose.

It made Maisie feel even more uneasy. She could swear that she’d turn her back for a moment and then three more identical hallways would appear from where they came from.

Each room/area was weirder. Some looked dungy and dirty, others looked straight out of the 1950’s. It was built to confuse you.

It was about 3am at this point, and they were both getting exhausted.

“Urgh, I just want to find an exit and sleep at this point…” Maisie mumbled.

“Me too…” Willa pulled her closer. “We’ve come this far though.”

“Willa, we’re literally lost in what seems to be a magic building. Let’s just go.”

“No. We’re going to get you answers.”

“Will… I don’t like this. We should’ve left once we came in.”

“Look,” She cupped her face with her hands. “I know this place is weird, but you’ve been-”

Alarms started going off, red lights started flashing.

“You know what, nevermind. Let’s leave. Now.” She grabbed Maisie and started running.

Whether it was the panic that immediately filled Maisie’s body or the alarm did something really fancy, the building managed to get even more complex.

Doors that were walls, dead ends, walls that were doors, windows that opened up to straight up dirt, 8 different hallways on one wall. It was enough to give you a headache and maybe a heartattack if you weren’t ready.

Willa was cursing, her grip tightening on just about ever corner. It was being to become painful at this point.

They eventually came to a dark room. No lights, no alarms. That’s weird…

“Why’s it dark in here?” She whispered as Willa tried to catch her breath.

There was scratching and… was that howling?

“Where’s a goddamn exit?” Willa hissed, pulled out her phone and turned on the flashlight again.

It was a long hallway, it stretched down further than Maisie could see. There were glass on the walls.

It was amazing how quickly this place could get even worse.

“What the actual fuck…”

Willa kept walking, although she was the most tense Maisie had ever seen her.

“Maisie, come on…” She tugged her arm.

She moved forward, just staring in horror. “Willa, have you looked through the glass?”

“Have you?” She swallowed.

“No, I can’t see.”

“Yeah, I don’t think I want to know what’s behind the glass.”

The hallway panned out into a bigger room, the glass continued, making it look like an aquarium you couldn’t see into.

Willa walked forward, holding her breath. “It’s a dead end… A dead end. A fucking dead end!”

“Shh!” Maisie covered her mouth.

The scratching and howling that filled the hallway stopped. Willa finally dared to look at the glass.

An empty room was behind it. It was pretty empty, having nothing in it besides a pathetically small bed, and on top of that bed was a teddy bear, staring back at them.

The room itself was falling apart, water damage, chunks of concrete from the wall completely missing and on the ground.

“That’s-” She screamed, something knocking her down, biting hard into her arm.

She cried in pain, trying to throw the thing off, her eyes squeezed shut.

Willa screamed in horror. The thing let go of her arm.

“Willa, run!” She screamed, knowing her scream caught its attention.

Willa ran.

Maisie finally opened her eyes, looking up.

The thing that bit her ran past, heading straight in Willa’s direction.

It was huge, running on all fours and covered in fur.

“No no no…” She quickly got up, trying to ignore the deep pain in her arm. “Please run please run please-”

Willa, predictable as ever, came back, hitting the thing straight on with a fire extinguisher.

It did not like that.

It stumbled back, taking a moment to recover. Willa didn’t notice, she ran back to Maisie.

“No!” Maisie tried to warn, but the thing had recovered fast.

It slashed Willa’s back, sending her straight to the ground. And it continued to slash.

Willa screamed in pain.

Maisie ran and grabbed the fire extinguisher. She ran back over, starting to hit the thing over and over.

It hurt to do, physically. Her arm was soaking her jacket sleeve by now, and it burned.

The thing howled in pain, pulling away from Willa. She crawled out from underneath it.

Maisie paused, seeing the thing unmoving on the ground. She discarded the fire extinguisher, stumbling over to Willa. “Are you okay? Are you conscious? Please be conscious…”

“I’m conscious, Mae.” She muttered, laying on her side. “Oh, god, your arm!”

She looked down at it. The bite wrapped around her entire arm, and covered her entire forearm. You could see the saliva of the thing covering the bite and her sleeve, being mixed in with her blood.

She nearly passed out seeing it.

“Look away, Maisie.” Willa quickly said, knowing how squeamish she was.

She swallowed, quickly dropping down to Willa’s level. “Uh, your back-”

“Don’t you try and fix it. You’ll definitely pass out.”

“Willa, you’re going to bleed out if I don’t look.”

“Just give yourself- LOOK OUT!” She wailed.

Maisie just turned around to get scratched in the face, being thrown straight into one of the rooms, crashing through the glass.

She landed on the ground, hitting her head on a chunk of concrete.

She didn’t move after that, all sounds around her falling on deaf ears.

Everything felt like it stopped. Her included.

***

When she woke up, she was no longer in the room.

She was in a waiting room, in a line.

There was sobbing all around her, people crying out something that Maisie couldn’t work out.

She looked ahead of her, trying to work out what was happening, but before she could do that, she blacked out.

***

She jolted, feeling her body surge again.

It felt like her soul had been ripped in half and poorly sewn back together.

She felt someone drag her by her feet. She didn’t have enough energy to fight against it.

Her head pounded, there was so much pain she couldn’t even point out where it was.

Was she dead? No, right. Why would she be dragged by her feet in the afterlife? Well, why would she be dragged by her feet in general, but particularly why the afterlife?

She forced her eyes open, as whoever was dragging her dropped her legs, causing another wave of pain to vibrate up her body.

She held back a cry, just swallowing back any noise. She was scared that would cause more pain.

“She’s dead.” A deep voice spoke.

Maisie felt her chest tighten. Please tell her that Willa wasn’t dead.

“You’re sure?” Another voice asked. Wait, was that Willa’s dad?

He didn’t sound that sad. Willa couldn’t be dead then, unless her dad was secretly emotionless.

But why the hell was he here?

“Of course I’m sure!” The deep voice exclaimed. “You saw me check her pulse!”

“Just confirm, Ellis.” Willa’s dad sighed.

A man came into her view.

“Well, would you look at that…” He muttered as he stared down at her. She didn’t like that.

“What?”

“She isn’t dead. Give me the… whatever you call it.”

There was more movement, and Maisie tried to move away, but she barely moved.

“Don’t move. You’re not going to be able to.” Ellis muttered.

Ellis dipped out of her view for a moment, before reappearing.

He crouched down, gently turning Maisie’s head to the side, and holding it down.

Maisie tried to push him off, but she felt more like she was flopping like a fish than anything.

“Don’t fight.” He said softly. “I’m trying to help you.”

This didn’t feel like help in the slightest, but she didn’t have much more fight left to give, and she sure didn’t have enough to do anything.

All she could do was admit defeat, and that was horrifying.

She felt pressure on the side of her neck for a second, before it disappeared.

“30 seconds, right?”

“Yeah, maybe 45, considering everything.”

She felt really exhausted now, and her eyes were starting to close themselves.

One last wave of anxiety filled her. What the hell was going to happen? She was being knocked out in this sketchy place. Oh god, this-

***

Maisie’s body felt heavy.

Everything felt fuzzy. What happened? She felt exhausted, more exhausted than she ever had.

She rolled over, trying to go back to sleep, only to fall straight on the cold ground.

She groaned, prying her eyes open. She was met with chunks of cement right in front of her face.

She sat up quickly, immediately regretting that decision.

Right, firstly, this definitely wasn’t her bedroom.

She gasped, her mind racing as she remembered what she assumed was the previous night.

She looked down at her arm, the bite wrapped in bandages.

She swallowed, looking back up and around. Her chest tightening as the realisation hit her like a truck.

She was in one of the glass rooms.

I feel like I need to write AU stuff for these two after I finish Maisie's lore. They cannot catch a break.

@arisdaughter @childofthewargod @debacleofdaemons @radkatzzstuff

@that-girl-cupid @daonedaonlysk @hispanic-child-of-hermes @daddy-issues-and-mxrder

@gaygirldoodles @smileyalater @if-i-could-cry-i-wouldnt @hellincarnation @your-favorite-mess

If you want to be added, removed or if I forgot to tag you, let me know :)

#m needs friends #camp half blood #pjo roleplay #percy jackson #pjo #pjo rp #percy jackson oc #percy jackson rp #percy jackson and the olympians #percy jackon and the olympians #percy pjo #percy series #pjo series #pjo fandom

69 notes · View notes

v4mpyinred · 2 days ago

Text

ok this might be hella long, but I need to scream about some details about Makoto Yuki in Persona 3 Reload, because they're so missable so I feel like nobody else has noticed or cared about them other than me!!!!

Please someone hear me out 😭 (spoilers ahead)

One underrated thing about Reload, which is my favorite thing ever, is that we get to hear Makoto's thoughts when interacting with the world around him. Compare it to FES where the game's inner dialouge is in 2nd person, Makoto's inner dialouge in Reload is in first person.

I didn't give too much attention to a Makoto's thoughts in my 1st playthrough and I think it's what made me not as attached to Makoto as I would've liked in that playthrough. But god, in my 2nd playthrough, especially after watching the movies, all of that changed...

I noticed that Makoto's thoughts genuinely change as the game progresses. You see him start off as indifferent to everything, to cherishing the memories he's made with his friends.

For instance, take a look at his thoughts on the kitchen. I don't have a screenshot of this, but at first, he doesn't really care and just sees it as another tool. But as the game progresses...

This dialouge makes me swoon every time 😭💜

One of the biggest hidden details is Makoto's inner thoughts when you interact with the book on the dorm table. He has individual thoughts on the handwriting of each member of SEES as they join, which were delightful to read in my 2nd playthrough.

But what shocked me the most was after Shinji dies, if you interact with the book, then here are Makoto's inner thoughts:

That "..." doesn't show up if you interact with the book again. This was very intentional. And god, did that hit me extremely hard. In fact, if you interact with anything involving Shinji after he passes, you can really see how much Makoto respected him :((

Once January rolls around, Makoto's thoughts change to this sweet message 😭💜

Ngl I almost teared up when I saw this for the first time. Especially since it was my 2nd playthrough, and I was actually attached to Makoto this time + I knew what was up ahead :')

shit there's even dialouge if you go to the bathroom on the Promised day 😍

Don't even get me started on Makoto's inner dialouge on March 4th. Pretty much everything interactable is changed to fit the mood of how tired Makoto is, but also how much he's appreciated the year and the memories he's made.

Like when you interact with the kitchen, his inner dialouge about the kitchen changes once last time to this (credits to alanamisako):

This shit made me burst into tears so badly 😭😭😭 "I'll never forget those precious memories" FOUL atlus, FOUL!!! His thoughts on Shinji's room change on March 4th as well 🥲

Just seeing how much Makoto had grown throughout the game, and knowing what was to come, made this, and all the other March 4th dialouge, even harder to get through in my 2nd playthrough. It also resonated with me, because I too will never forget the precious memories I've made with this game...

Things like this make me appreciate Reload so much. Interacting with every little thing is my favorite pass time in video games that allow me to do it. I've probably wasted so much time in games doing this. But most game's interactables don't have this depth, and they certainly don't change at all, even as the game and protagonist develop. I also feel like nobody else takes the time to really interact with everything or see if there's anything else to see before they progress (trust me, if a game says go left, I'm always going to go right first), and it makes me sad that so much of this, and other details, go unnoticed. I've certainly heard "I've never noticed that" a lot when sharing these sorts of things with people 😭

Things like this really help flesh out the protagonist people call "bland". I really love silent protagonist and developing their personality based on their thoughts on the world around them. I also love worldbuilding and learning about other characters through it.

And I'm trying so hard to not let Makoto take Joker's place as my favorite protagonist (cuz the rest of SEES have already done that to the PTs LOL) but it's been getting harder these days. Makoto is just so perfect! I love his growth & seeing all of his inner thoughts and combining it with movie Makoto's AMAZING characterization (plz watch the p3 movies ya'll) just made me super attached to him!! I could scream about Makoto all day. He cares so much for his friends, and it's thanks to them that he's able to appreciate the life he didn't know he could have 🥲

So I highly encourage you to interact with everything when playing Reload! From NPCs, to random things that aren't the main objective (trying to leave when you're supposed to be fighting a full moon shadow leads to some funny dialouge for instance), etc etc.. especially as the game progresses. I mean, we all laughed at the 3 coffins in the Love Hotel, and there's so many other details and foreshadowing like that I can't even get into! It really immerses you and attaches you to the protag, but also makes the end of the game hit hard...That "my eyes feel heavy" got me horribly in my 2nd playthrough after keeping up with Makoto's thoughts the entire game HOO BOY!🥲

I also recommend you do this with other games as well. Video games have always been an experience over just a game to me. And I want to experience as much of the game as I can, even silly little things like this :)

#makoto yuki #minato arisato #persona 3 #p3r #persona 3 reload #p3 mc #my gawd this is so long..the adhd took over. do ppl even read these tumblr essays?#someone please enthuse about this with me #i've been going so insane i love yukiiii my baby boy #and i love P3 Reload so much man i dont think anything on the planet could top it #i hope my yap session made you appreciate Reload a bit more as well #or maybe i just sound insane. eh i'll take that

65 notes · View notes

floraleevee · 1 hour ago

Text

Caveats/notes:

Many growers have reported success with “ZeroWater” filters. Not recommended if you have a lot of plants, as you’ll burn through filters quickly (but if you do, you probably already know all this). Additionally, ZeroWater filters have a tendency to FLOOD your water with nutrients when the filter is old (like, higher TDS than normal tap water). So highly recommended to have a TDS meter to make sure it’s still good. Tbh I’d just get distilled at the store, but some growers prefer this option 🤷

There are cheap RO systems that hook up to sinks. I’ve used an RO Buddy for over 5 years without having to replace any of the filters. Since I used to have hundreds of carnivorous plants for the majority of that time, that’s pretty dang good. I think I was going through ~10 gallons a week during my peak years, though am down to 4 gallons a week now. iirc it cost about $60. I don’t use the optional 4th filter, as it’s unnecessary and is so fine that the flow rate is reportedly abysmal. I will say the RO Buddy is fairly slow when using a sink - I get about 1 gallon every 15 minutes. The RO buddy generally can hook up to kitchen sinks in the US just fine, but idk about outside the US. Additionally, I’ve found it doesn’t work on bathroom sinks. You can get a cheap adapter at a hardware store for like $5, though, and then can use your bathroom.

Deionized water is good too. Most people probably don’t have access to it, which is why I’m guessing bogleech didn’t mention it. But if you work in a lab you may have access to deionized water.

Some people collect the condensation from their a/c units. Don’t ask me how, I don’t know.

Be careful with rainwater. Some roofs are treated with chemicals that over time begin to leach out. Nothing too terribly harmful for the native plants around your house, but can reportedly kill carnivorous plants.

I just want to reiterate bogleech: Not all wetlands are equal! Even if you do have a bog nearby, I highly recommend not using that water. For one, bogs are extremely sensitive and it’s generally recommended you don’t step in one if you can avoid it. I’ve done conservation research in bogs and had to submit my plans to the land manager, who came back to me and said “you’re permitted to access this small portion of the bog. That’s all I’m willing to sacrifice for research”. Because, yeah, they are THAT sensitive. Also, there are gonna be potential pathogens in the water that you don’t want on your plants.

You actually can get away with tap temporarily. If the options are “let my plants dry up and die of thirst” or “water with tap water”, give them tap. As soon as possible, flush their pots/soil with DI/RO water. If your plants are in trays/nested pots, don’t let the water collect in them when flushing. Growth will likely be stunted for several weeks/months as the plants work to regrow their damaged roots, but stunted growth is better than dead. This is highly variable between taxa, with at least one study showing Sarracenia having some of the most resilient roots (though anecdotally I’ve heard Nepenthes hold up fairly well as well).

Related to the last point: some people live in areas with really low TDS tap water. Generally, this seems to be from people that use well water rather than city water. Again, TDS meters (total dissolved solids meters) are a handy tool. The lower the TDS the better, with consensus being that ~50 ppm* is the upper limit (again, anecdotes from growers report Nepenthes can actually handle a bit higher, but those are circumstantial and I wouldn’t risk it) * it might actually be parts per thousand. My TDS meter is already set to the units I need, so I don’t remember which. Sorry 😅

I highly, HIGHLY recommend anyone looking to grow carnivorous plants read The Savage Garden by Peter D’Amato. There’s a good chance you’re going to mess something else up with your plant(s). Carnivorous plants are extremely sensitive to other factors, such as soil type and (in the event of pathogens) fungicides/pesticides/miticides. Most want more sun than you think they do. Peter’s book is incredibly well detailed and organized, so you can easily find whatever info you need. I’ve also found most libraries carry it both physically and digitally, and both types of copies are generally not checked out.

Every day in carnivorous plant groups someone asks why their carnivorous plant died and reveals that they used pond water, or filtered tap water, or mountain spring water.

Carnivorous plants cannot adapt to anything but water with the properties of fresh condensation. This is ABSOLUTELY INFLEXIBLE, there is no wiggle room, you cannot get away with giving them the wrong water, not temporarily, not even once!

The only sources for this water are:

Bottled water with "distilled" on the front label, and no other different wording, no "purified" or "spring!"

Water from a reverse osmosis filter. Not a brita filter or any other filter! A reverse osmosis filter is a large expensive system, so no filter you just plug onto your tap will count.

Fresh rainwater that has not touched soil, ie collected in a plastic tub.

Water from a natural bog, which is a very specific type of wetland and very rare in most of the world!

449 notes · View notes

ghost-bison · 1 day ago

Text

a christopher eccleston appreciation post

i will never say this enough because i don't know enough words, nor do i think such words exist, that could even begin to summarize how much i love christopher eccleston, but... i love christopher eccleston. and, more importantly, i have a deep-rooted respect for that man.

i started doctor who as, let's be honest, a sci-fi hater, forcing myself because i was obsessed with david tennant, and i was kind of dreading the first series because of this. but i was dead wrong.

he broadened my mind, gave me so many laughs, and so many cries, and i'm not the first to say that whenever eccleston is on the screen you just can't take your eyes off him, even when he's not supposed to be the main focus of the scene.

the way he can switch from silly goose to traumatized soldier in a matter of seconds will never cease to amaze me. or how he can play with both like he's on a swing by balancing it out with sarcasm?

i think whoever doesn't give him the title role in their shows/films is either an idiot, or they know the main character just isn't always the best.

i think it's downright idiotic and shameful that he gets rejected from ever playing some shakespeare just because of his northern accent (they're just posh elitist pos). now that he's older, and that times are evolving (i mean, i hope the world of theater is vibing with this evolution, but i'm not delusional), i hope we get to see him portray a character like leontes in winter's tale cause i know he'd be absolutely perfect for the role, and who better than shakespeare (this character especially, with his nuances and highs and lows and breakdowns and breakthroughs) to match acting like his?

saw an article where eccleston talked about how the moment he really knew he wanted to be an actor was when he had to wear mascara for a play, and had enjoyed it. i think he talks about it in his autobiography too (you should read it, btw, it's frankly affordable, and he happens to be a marvelous writer as well).

eccleston knows he is mistakenly type-cast, because of his background, as macho men and tough blokes in general. he's aware that it's kind of a big part of his culture. again, he talks about it i think in the very first chapter, how for instance he used to dress up as james bond, the pinnacle of "masculinity", which i think was a disguise in the metaphorical sense of the term, to mask his delicacy and femininity (or at least, that's my interpretation of it).

in his biography, eccleston talks about the differences between him and his dad, ronnie: he was surprised, as a child, whenever his father's affection manifested as a kiss or a hug, cause that usually wasn't his father's way of doing things. he compares it to how he, in contrast, has the habit of kissing his own son, albert, and telling him he loves him.

you can find it as well in how he talks about his anorexia, his body dysmorphia and, i think we can call it that, gender dysphoria. he's from a time when those concepts didn't even exist, they weren't a thing to the public eye. my father and my step-father, both feminine men in their own way, and both around eccleston's age, both told me about the struggle that it represented, not being the stereotype of the macho tough guy, and being surrounded by boys who didn't struggle with that issue. it made my dad a junkie, my stepdad a depressive artist, and, apparently, it made eccleston an anorexic actor.

i think it takes a lot of courage for people that age (the boomer generation as we call them), especially men, from whom we expect toxic masculinity, masculinity pushed to an extreme, to be able to openly call it out and dissect it into what it is: a ridiculous standard. but to be a PUBLIC FIGURE, in his 60s, and still find the strength to express it? damn. takes guts, i think.

most of us on this website, we're babies. most of us are at most in their thirties. the millenials and the gen z, and now the gen alpha, we take that for granted. or get offended and scandalized that being able to express oneself isn't yet a basic standard.

but then, i talk to my mum, and i realize that she had to stray from her catholic, sexist education, she had to make up her own mind about things in order for me to be born a free spirit. and that's just considering my mum's a cishet.

christopher eccleston expressed in other words that he doesn't fully consider himself to be cisgendered. i have mad respect for the way he talks about it, and for even talking about it at all.

then, there's his honesty. the more interviews i watch, the more it impresses me. he knows honesty goes hand in hand with dignity. i'm sorry but i'm tired of people who are nice all the time. you never know when they're being honest, and maybe some of them are, who knows. but i'm not stupid enough to think that so many people are just pure sunshine all the time (respect for tennant for lashing out publically about transphobia, i think he passed the test).

eccleston? he knows how to be both brutally honest and yet respectful at the same time. no ukulele apology from this man and holy fuck, it feels good!

i've seen him call russel t davies out for his lack of professionalism on the set of doctor who, and then list him amongst the great writers he's worked with. which makes me want to believe eccleston's side, because, if you're always either too polite, or too full of spite about eveything, who's to say you're not the problem? i've got way less trouble believing you if you can stay unbiased about a person you're having beef with than if suddenly everything said person does turns into shit just cause you don't like them. that's just maturity and wisdom.

one last thing i love about eccleston is that he is interested in other people's lives. there's a critic by marcus berkmann in his book that perfectly expresses my point: "you know what to expect from the autobiographies of most actors, i think: anecdotes, charm, more than mild self-satisfaction and faux-modesty by the bucketload. but christopher eccleston is not most actors".

and that's it. watch him in interviews and at convention panels, where he lets his younger co-stars speak before himself, and seizes the occasion when journalists ask him questions that are meant to make him talk about himself to praise his writers and other actors instead.

read his autobiography, which is both a love letter to his dad and a big let's-be-honest about the struggles of growing up poor and his personal struggles, because he thinks raising awareness is just as important as protecting himself.

look at his instagram posts where he unabashedly disses the monarchy and stays true and loyal to his background even after getting a taste of money. and his other posts where he shares his love for acorns and spending time with his kids.

i've seen him nearly break down in shame and regret on television for having stolen a kid's crisps in primary school. and not trying to find lame excuses for his behaviour. no ukulele apology, just facts, just christopher eccleston showing us what masculinity in its purest, most beautiful form should be about

38 notes · View notes

oh-sturg · 3 days ago

Text

TADC is about suicide and here’s why

TW : Suicide

CW : Spoilers

Okay so. First of all, this might be a cold take. Someone else might’ve done this already or come up with this theory, I haven’t watched any videos EXCEPT for the actual show. So maybe I’m late to this

Additionally, we’re only on episode 4 of season 1 I could be COMPLETELY wrong on this. I might be looking too deep, so give me a grain of salt

The circus itself is giving very. Place after death vibes. Not purgatory, or heaven, or hell. But just… somewhere people go after they die. Yes I know in the first episode Pomni says she can’t get this stupid headset off so hey, maybe she’s still alive?? I DONT KNOW FOR SURE but maybe the headset is giving her a glimpse into the afterlife?

That, or it’s some kind of therapy program

IGNORING THAT

All of the main cast act like stereotypes of suicide victims, maybe it’s just me

Jax is an asshole, that much is obvious. We haven’t been given many inclinations into whether or not he has a softer side, but he seems to be compensating for something. It could be insecurity

Gangle is assumed to have been a shift manager at either a fast food restaurant or some other similar chain job, and it’s implied she wanted artist only to be told her dreams were unrealistic. Something that some people don’t know about people who are suicidal is that they can become extremely happy before going through with it, which we see with Gangle in episode 4 before she’s hit by a truck. Now the truck thing could be an accident, but she literally leans into the road. She looks surprised to see the truck, and maybe she was unaware of her surroundings at the time, but it could be that she also was surprised to go through the same experience again. She literally says that she snapped under the pressure of the job and responsibility. Could be headcanon. There’s also the whole masking emotions thing which is quite literal in its presentation

Ragatha is obviously toxicly positive. She tries to make things better and look on the bright side of things. She’s courteous and compassionate, but there’s no way she can be like that constantly. It’s just not humanly possible. Gangle says in episode 4 it’s hard to tell when she’s being genuine after you spend a lot of time with her, so perhaps it’s a coping method? Or a habit? In the pilot episode/episode 1, she literally tells Pomni she understands if she leaves her behind while she’s in pain. Maybe I’m misremembering, but she values others over herself. After a certain point that becomes exhausting. You can’t do it anymore

Zooble clearly goes through body dysmorphia as seen in episode 3. They don’t like their body, no matter how many times they can change it. This could also be a gender dysphoria thing, but we don’t see a lot of their relationship with their gender other than their pronouns being non-binary

Kinger is one I struggle with a little bit. We know he had a relationship with Queenie, and now she’s gone, but we don’t know if that relationship started in the circus or before either of them were brought into it. What we do know for sure is that he’s paranoid. In his first appearance the cast literally speculates that he will be the one to abstract next, with abstraction being the product of heavy dissociation. Sure, he’s not all paranoia and fear, but he’s wary. He’s a kind soul who broke under everything

Caine’s influence in all this is that he’s someone who isn’t depressed or suicidal. He’s the person who tries to fix those people, but goes about it in the wrong way. He’s trying to take their mind off of what makes them suicidal by shifting their attention. When they try to open up to him, he doesn’t understand their issues because he just isn’t suicidal like they are/were. Like Ragatha, he’s toxicly positive and tries to change the topic when things like that come up. Think of someone who doesn’t want you to show symptoms of mental illness around them because they “don’t like it” or “are offput” by it

That’s really all I’ve got on this. Again, I could be wrong or I might be totally late to the party but I can’t get this out of my head so

47 notes · View notes

thewalrusespublicist · 2 days ago

Note

"Tbh I was starting to feel a bit down about my blog and what I was putting out ( the eternal crisis on how to give full answers and opinions without being stupid, boring and annoying lol)"

OMG no way! Your blog is one of the best here! What i love the most is reading the analysis and meta from the users, there's always more information and good takes, and yours are always quite deep and insightful.

I would love if you share your opinions about Stuart as well. I feel like he is obviously more sanctified that he should be since he died young (like that insane quote from his mom saying that Brian told her that Stuart could have been the Beatles' manager, no way lol) and i feel his memory has been used to attack Paul, sometimes in a very unfair way. Like, i don't deny the teenage drama and jealousy that Paul felt about him but he *was* a shitty bass player and the band was Paul's future, he was allowed to criticized him not only for being John's new bestie. I also think John played with them both but i lack of your eloquence so i will love to read your take about it.

Hi anon! And the other anons!

Thank you again and to all the other messages I got, they were extremely sweet and really made my day. :)

From my inbox, it's clear you guys want to know about Stu and his role in the Beatles legacy. Well you asked for it and a novel you shall have. Be warned this might be the longest post I've done so grab like a drink or something.

A few disclaimers: I wish and had intended for this to be more of a deep dive into Stu as a whole person rather than just his relationship with John and Paul. Unfortunately I just didn't have the space to do it. If you want to know more about Stu I would highly recommend @eppysboys' blog which is the source for all things Stu Sutcliffe and where I got a lot of this info. Please check their stuff out. Also, I'm going to be a bit blunter on this than maybe I usually am because this topic has been irritating me for some time. Oh also I’m trying my best to answer a lot of asks in one post so please forgive if I don’t fully answer your specific ask about this!

Stu in a perfect world should be a fandom darling: an exciting cipher, a handsome artistic talent that died way too soon who had a major influence in the early Beatles style. It's like there’s this secret other James Dean looking mf Beatle hidden away to uncover, that's cool and he is cool! The problem is that he’s sort of becomes radioactive to talk about in a normal way due to how he's been portrayed and utilised in some biographies and fandom spaces, particularly those that have been infected by John Lennon aspirational boy bestie syndrome. As those types of spaces cannot seem to exist without tearing down Paul to prop John up as their special lil guy, Stu as John's other best friend has become the ideal heavy object to hit Paul McCartney over the head with. It's like a corrosive element, the minute Stu hits a Beatles bio, the biographer suddenly loses all training in objectivity and source work and starts waxing lyrical about 100 percent reliable never biased or wrong Saint Stu of Hamburg who died for our condom arson sins and that Paul McCartney should feel bad about every day of his life for not worshipping Stu and not accepting his own ‘place’ in life as John's just-some-guy placeholder best friend. I’ve personally seen so many posts and forums where Stu being mentioned leads to a legion of comments about how Paul could never have been Stu (correct both ways) and how John would never have even glanced at Paul for much longer if Stu had been alive. Sidenote: If you seriously think that the musical savant from down the road whom John went on to produce the most prolific song writing partnership in history with couldnt have kept his attention for long then I'm begging you on hands and knees to get your head out of the arse of your John Lennon body pillow and be serious. But anyway…

This boy bestie battle royale approach has in turn lead to a reflex reaction where Stu gets studiously ignored by other sections of the fandom as a precedent has been set that shining a light on him diminishes Paul and John's relationship with Paul. It's frustrating because if people weren't so keen to cut Paul out of his own story then we would get a much better nuanced view of every single person involved.

So let's put aside all of our defenses, cut the John Lennon loved one ranking system bullshit and lets look at the actual question here which is what was John and Stu's relationship really like and what did he mean to John?

John and Stu met at art college a year or so after Paul and John met. Up to that point John and Paul had their fun little codependant thing going on but Stu quickly became a huge fixture in John's life. Stu had things that Paul couldn't really offer at that point in time. John was at his heart a musician who aspired to be seen as an artist (he would later express surprise that he didn't become an artist). Stu was the passionate artist who knew tons about the art of the period that could teach and inspire John. Their creative leanings meant they could work on projects together and share art notebooks and poetry. (Including yes the one with anti-semitic story which I mention again as I believe it's an important thing to remember when it comes to both John and Stu and the culture of the time.) Stuart by the sounds of it was even writing a novel about John at the time of his death. They were fascinated and inspired by each other.

So, creatively they fired each other up but more importantly perhaps, Stu and John were peers. It's funny to think about when you see the Beatles later but at the time Paul and George were the kids in their school uniform coming to see their cool older friend at art school. That's an important divide. When Paul and George's parents insisted their kids do their homework and go to bed, John and Stu could stay up and talk all hours of the night, which they did. They also could rent a place together and spend long hours chatting (despite John moving out later after realising electricity cost money lol.) There's a different dynamic that the age similarity offered as well. Whilst Paul would later somewhat grow into this role, Stu could act as an authority figure to John as well as open up to John in a way you can really only do with your peers. Stu was the person John opened up to throughout Stu's life:

How long can one go on writing and writing like you. I now don’t really know who I’m writing to or why it’s quiet peculiar. I usually write like this and forget about it but if I put it in a little part of my [almost?] secret self in the hands of someone miles away who will wonder what the hell is going on or just pass it off as toilet paper. Anyway I don’t care really what happens because when I think about it, it’s so bloody unimportant – but what is important who has the right to say that this letter is not important and this is a something any way – anyway – anyway – yeah! I wonder what it would be like to be a cretin or something. I bet it’s gear. & how are you keepin Stuart old chap are you as ok – is life as good – bad shite, great – wonderful as it was or is it just a thousand years of nothing and coolness on and on and on. I think this is it Goodbye Stu don’t write out of – er what is it? well not because you think you ought to write when you feel like So goodbye (from John you know the one with glasses) ANYWAY BYE BYE see you soon I don’t know why I said that I remember a time when everyone I loved hated me because I hated them so what so what so fucking what I remember a time when belly buttons were knee high when only shitting was dirty and everything else clean + beautiful I can’t remember anything without a sadness So deep that it hardly becomes known to me so deep that its tears leave me a spectator of my own STUPIDITY + so I go rambling on with a hey nonny nonny nonny no

Extract from a letter to Stuart Sutcliffe from John Lennon, 1961

By lots of accounts Stu was gentle but firm when it came to telling John he'd gone too far. John references this aspect of Stu to Hunter Davies:

"I looked up to Stu. I depended on him to tell me the truth. Stu would tell me if something was good and I'd believe him."

The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (Hunter Davies)

In this way I kind of see Stu as a proto-Yoko. John was so insecure and uncertain about his grip on the world and reality that he relied on Stu to be his point of reference and guide. Paul did this too later and I think in Hunter Davies John mentions this, but not at this time period and not as much due to their competitiveness. This may be why some people saw Stu as the person that really understood John at this time period:

"During the turbulent adolescence that prefaced a turbulent manhood, hardly anyone knew Lennon as intimately as Stuart Sutcliffe. If they weren't exactly David and Jonathan, June Furlong, one of the life models at Liverpool's Regional College of Art, had "never seen two teenagers as close as those two."

The Gospel According To Lennon by Alan Clayson

Now this person likely never met John and Paul together but this is only one of many similar quotes and even Julia captain of John and Paul's friendship boat seems to agree there was a period where Stu dominated and Paul 'kept his distance' from the John-Cyn-Stu 'menage-a-trois'. But the friendship wasn't perfect and his position as John's ultimate best friend was never iron clad. This is best outlined by the shit they pulled when John convinced him to join on Bass for the Beatles.

Despite being John's best friend, Stu was teased and bullied:

"They argued as usual amongst themselves, but most of all they picked on Stu, the newest member of the group. John, George and Paul had been with each other long enough to know that rows and arguments and criticism didn't mean much. If it did, you just argued back. "We were terrible," says John. "We'd tell Stu he couldn't sit with us, or eat with us. We'd tell him to go away, and he did." At one hotel they stayed at, a variety show had just left. There had been a dwarf in the show and they found out which bed he had slept in and said that would have to be Stu's. They certainly weren't going to sleep in it. So Stu had to. "That was how he learned to be with us," says John. "It was all stupid, but that was what we were like."

The Beatles: The Authorised Biography (Hunter Davies)

Why John encouraged this I have no idea, maybe jealousy over Stu's looks and wanting to play people off each other? Things were tense in both Scotland and Hamburg, especially between Stu and Paul. As I said in my last post, the girls were fighting and it was mutual. Paul was mad for both fair and immature teenage-boy reasons. Stu could not be bothered with the bass most of the time and couldn't really play well and was only there as he was '(John's) best friend' (ouch for Paul). Paul conversely had given up higher education to be there and was sending lots of money back home. He also was dating the girl Paul fancied. Stu was popular with the new group and also did mean things like help John steal Paul's money when money was really tight for him. Paul in turn was a passive aggressive, jealous and mean. It all came to ahead in the punch up onstage which according to Spitz came about from Paul wanting money back and saying that Stu could borrow some from Astrid. Stu goes for him and reports vary from full-on bust up to embarrassing scuffle. Stu then goes to where Astrid and Paul's gf Dot are, demands Dot leaves and goes on a rant about Paul. Now all of this must be framed in the context of Stu receiving increasing brain damage from his condition that seemingly lead to mood swings and anger. Nevertheless, the mutual needling and anger, as well as John's refusal to do/say fuck all about it, especially given how protective John was of Stu, suggests that it wasn’t straightforward and/or John may have been playing some games to make both feel threatened. This would also make sense as to why we hear conflicting accounts of John and Stu being the centre of everything and everyone else in orbit AND John and Paul being the centre and everyone else playing catch-up, as well as John giving Paul the lead to take him round the Reeperbahn when John got dressed in the gorilla costume. (I know Paul may have just been the closest there but that always gave off bestie behaviour to me.)

(I did get an ask about how John and Paul's friendship survived it, I think it was damaged by Hamburg. When Paul got back home he got a job at a construction site and there's just a vibe of everything being a bit on tenterhooks. John also acts a bit weird at the period, not talking to anyone for a few weeks then making a lot of weird demands from Paul. I'm really not sure what to make of it.)

Even when he's back in Liverpool, John still writes long letters to Stu and vice-versa. I can't find it at all but I’ve read a really sad interview with John saying he missed his best mate and it's a shame that he's not with them. He had no idea at that point that Stu had already died of a brain hemorrhage at 21.

John is said to have gone into hysterics when he found out Stu had died. A lot of people who've spoken about this time (Aunt Mimi, his sister Julia, the Exsis) concur that at this point Stu was his best friend and the death shattered him. He even told Astrid he wished he could give his life for Stu’s. This is backed up by the fact that John never forgot Stu and his shadow lingered for the rest of John's life:

Stu was recalled in In My Life

Years later, after John composed the first of his truly poignant and heartfelt Beatles songs, "In My Life"—with its lines about "friends I still can recall/some are dead and some are living"—he revealed to me that the two people he had had uppermost in mind were myself and Stuart Sutcliffe. And then he stunned me with a statement that I'd never heard him address to anyone—least of all to another man. "You know, Pete," he said softly, "I do love you. But," he quickly added, "I loved Stuart as well."

Weird that Paul isn't mentioned surely you think that he would be mentioned if Pete was there too okay, okay my tin hat is going away this isn't the time

Pete Shotton, Nicholas Schaffner, John Lennon: In My Life

In 1965 John drew Stu on a postcard

He apparently said this about Stu prior to sending the postcard, prompted by an article about Stuart.

The card had been sent from Genoa mid-way through the Beatles' Italian tour. [...] But the conversation had become maudlin when I reminded him that he was going to talk to me for an article about Stuart. [...] In that sad telephone conversation before they set off for Milan, I asked him if he was happy: 'I'd be a lot happier if Stuart was still part of us,' he said, 'The Beatles would be complete.' And before he rang off he said 'Ill send you something.'

He also appears on the cover of Sgt Pepper

As mentioned, Stu gets mentioned in Hunter Davies in terms of wistfulness and guilt AND he gets a mention in John's insane 'if I were a homosexual' ramblings in early 70s. According to Yoko, John also wanted Yoko to write letters to him and didn't think it would be strange because Stu wrote letters to him.

I have a pet theory that as with a lot of things for John, his unresolved grief over Stu really came to the fore in the late 60s now that he had actually had a chance to sit down and think about things. I believe it was partially why he wanted Yoko to write letters and why he gets mentioned in the early 70s as a collaborator/best friend and not in 1980 where John only gives that credit to Paul and Yoko. I think with the cracks with Paul, John had started to think back on his old friend and guide and what advice he would give.

Stuarts presence is still felt throughout the seventies:

“He told me everything. He loved to talk about Hamburg. There were no secrets. It was the kind of life I never knew…. It meant total freedom. At his side always was Stuart, sweet Stuart. There wasn’t a time in John’s life when he didn’t think about Stuart. He spoke always of his love and respect for Stuart.”

Yoko discussing Stu in When They Were Boys: The True Story of the Beatles’ Rise to the Top by Larry Kane

Coming to grips with his death is also present in Skywriting

SEAN O’HAIRE: What happened to Stuart Cliff? DR. FISCHY: What happened was a full exchange of energy where it was not needed within the expression of your own self or in the energies involved around and about you. We cannot call it a happening. We’ll say it is an awakening, for in that way it has served an expression from the past to the present and to the future to where there shall be more of that incomplete vibration expressed to you in a more fuller understanding.

Skywriting by Word of Mouth, John Lennon

This isn't exhaustive but I think from all this it's pretty clear that John adored Stu, John grieved Stu and kept grieving Stu. Stu had a specific place in his life as a confidant that he tried to recreate with Yoko. At the time of Stu's death, he was John's best friend, probably slightly over Paul. Stuart had been able to be both a friend and paternal presence, a confidant and an artistic collaborator. His presence and loss was one of the foundational points in John's life.

But as we've been asked to play this stupid game and so many bios like to make a hoopla about it, were they at their closest ever as close as John and Paul were at their height?

No.

How do we know? Because John told us so:

" He [Paul] still is the closest friend I've ever had, except for Yoko, so I'm still close to him whatever goes on."

John Lennon to an interviewer, 1971

But Walrus! John just says shit! How do we know he isn't leaving out Stu because the press don't know Stu. Well true John does just say shit but this is at a time where John isn't the most glowing about Paul and he's had no problem mentioning Stu in this time period ('one of my best friends ever' would have made a similar point).

But Walrus again! If John picked Stu over Paul when they were young why wouldn't he be the boy bestie of all time, and why would John say that he was closer to Paul? Well, because of the environment and timings. Stu's death happened near the beginning of John and Paul's major bonding moments. If you look at their personal timeline, Paris, the Nerk twins, and getting signed happened just before Stu died. That's missing the major years of Beatlemania, Key West, LSD, Paul growing more into being John's peer and a load of other huge moments in their lives. It's like how John writes to Cyn in 1962 about wanting the house to themselves and not have Paul around all the time. Would you say because he feels closer to Cyn then that John in his overall lifetime loved Cyn more than Paul? No, because relationships change over time and theirs were no exception. (One thing to consider as well is that we don't yet have many letters between John and Paul during their Beatles years and earlier, probably because they were spending so much time with each other. We know a couple exist that Paul considers too personal for publication but I'm sure there are others. It's easy to understand what John felt for Stu as we have the letters, I think we would also have an easier time understanding what John felt for Paul if we had the equivalent of those.)

At the end of the day Paul was the man he believed he had a psychic bond with, the man he couldn’t shut up about, the man whom he’d conquered the world with with their endless collaboration, the man with a twin personality to him and according to John spent more time with throughout the 60s than he had with Yoko ever. To be frank if Paul had died in 67' I don't think this would have been a conversation.

As mentioned early, in early 1970s John elevates his partnership with Stu to his collaborations with Paul and Yoko but by 1980 he’s pretty clear that Paul and Yoko are their own category.

"I was saying to somebody the other day, “There’s only two artists I’ve ever worked with for more than a one night stand, as it were. That’s Paul McCartney, and Yoko Ono.” And I think that’s a pretty damned good choice!!"

John Lennon interview with DJ Dave Sholin, 1980

There are of course the what ifs. Would Stu still being alive mean that John was not as close with Paul? Maybe, highly doubtful though as the Beatles experience was so intense. If Stu remained a Beatle would John be as close with Paul? If Stu remained a Beatle he wouldn't be Stu so no. At the same time who knows what it would have been like if Paul and John were peers from the off? I said this to @the62ndbugsfan when it comes to Stu vs Paul (hi girl sorry i've made our chat a whole ass post lol) but to go a bit Wuthering Heights, soulmates are made as much from the earth as they are of the stars. What binds us is our experiences just as much as our personalities. There may be a universe where Stu and John took on the art world together or became inseparable bffs again after the Beatles disbanded, but it is not our universe. In this universe Stu tragically died and John and Paul chose to become Lennon/McCartney and artistically unite themselves forever.

Even going back to Stu's lifetime, I've said it before and I'll say it again I find it interesting that not only did John choose to go to Paris with Paul rather than pay to meet up with Stu somewhere but that they arranged to meet up with Juergen and nobody told Stu until they'd already gone. Stu was shocked and didn't know if it meant the end of the Beatles which is a pretty big thing for him not to know about. Why didn't John tell him if they're apparently still writing long letters? Was it because he really wanted to do this with Paul and didn't want to hurt Stu's feelings? And that's really the point I want to make here. Due to his trauma John was preoccupied with reinforcing ranking of relationships within his life. But the thing is friendship rankings are made up guidelines and the reality is far more complicated. You can have a designated best friend but feel closer to another friend at times, you can want to do one thing specifically with one friend and not the other for various reasons. You can (as I do) have more than one equal best friend. Friendship as with most relationships are in a constant state of flux and each friendship you have will give and mean a different thing, even if they are of similar value to you.

Paul may have ended up closer to John than Stu had been, but that doesen't make John's relationship with Stu any less special. Nor does Stu negate the significance of Paul. Whilst both fit into John's pattern of intense relationships and demands related to that, both had unique positions and meaning to him. Considering what I've gone into about John's closeness to Stu, it actually says something deeply, borderline unnervingly, intense about John and Paul that Paul pipped Stu to the post. Maybe it's time Beatles bios accept the fact that John Lennon just wouldn't be into them like that, stop using a tragically prematurely deceased young man as a prop in their jealous psychological warfare against Paul McCartney, stop perpetuating one of the most damaging games that John did to his loved ones and allow both relationships the space to shine and showcase the amazing talent that was the Beatles and those that surrounded them.

51 notes · View notes

snailsgoingdowntown · 2 days ago

Text

Help, I Reincarnated as the Female Lead’s Sister-in-Law!

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 10

Chapter 9

‘Slight’ Yandere! Dion Agriche x Fem! Reader

Arranged marriage AU

Warnings: thoughts about self-harm (biting thumb again), accidental self-injury(? + biting inside of lip which causes it to bleed), thoughts about implied murder, near panic attack, implied depression, slight blood, small/slight themes of obsession and possessiveness, slight themes of misogyny/some toxic behavior from Reader's family, please tell me if I missed any.

Nsfw warnings: OKAY, I honestly think Maria, if she becomes fond of a daughter-in-law, would absolutely push for grandchildren and take things into her own hands unless someone (Sierra) tries really hard to convince her otherwise. I’m really sorry for writing her as a creep but this will be the last time (either completely or for a very long time) I’ll write her like this. Anyway: suggestive, throwback to their 1st night, gifting of lingerie and aphrodisiac by Maria (again will not write her like this either completely or a long time, I tried rewriting this chapter so fucking much but this is what I settled on because it felt the most natural to me.) pushing for grandchildren, Maria somehow got the Reader’s measurements, please tell me if I missed any.

DISCLAIMER: I DO NOT CONDONE ANY OF THE HARMFUL AND/OR DANGEROUS/TOXIC ACTIONS AND/OR BEHAVIORS THAT TAKE PLACE IN THIS PIECE OF FICTION. THESE ACTIONS/BEHAVIORS SHOULD NOT BE NORMALIZED NOR ROMANTICIZED AS THEY ARE BOTH EXTREMELY TOXIC AND DANGEROUS.

MINORS/BLANK BLOGS/BLOGS THAT DO NOT INTERACT OR REBLOG ANYTHING FANDOM RELATED (FICS, ART, ETC.) DNI.

===

‘Dear father and mother,

I am doing well so far. The food is nice and the clothes comfortable. I haven’t personally spoken to my father-in-law yet, but I’m going to meet him for dinner tomorrow at the time of writing this. My husband, Dion is different from what I expected. Too nice. He’s not as brutal as others described him. It was surprising. But he’s a pervert and I almost hit him out of frustration and rejected his sexual advances like any sane person would. I know that you’ll say I should have let it happen, mother, but it hurt so bad I don’t think he’ll ever fit. Speaking of those vulgar activities, you lied he wasn’t flustered in the slightest until I started crying. Can you believe that? He’s a creep! But hopefully he doesn’t kill or torture me he’ll continue to treat me nicely.

Of course, as his wife I’ll do my best to support him in fear of him or Lant killing me otherwise in every field to the best of my abilities. Just how you forced taught me.

I have talked to a few in-laws, including my mother-in-law. I heard that you drank with her, mother. She's very lively and has a sadistic unique personality. She’s very sweet to me. I have also met the fourth wife, Sierra. She’s lovely, I think you’ll also get along with her, mother.

I hope that the two of you are faring well. The same goes for Zac and Elena, of course. Speaking of them, how has Zac’s studies been? He’s not skipping them again, is he or planning something dangerous like that stupid but well-meant plan he informed you, father, about? Yes, I overheard everything?

Is Elena doing well in her pregnancy? I know she moved out before me, but I’m still concerned about her and the baby. And Albert, he’s taking care of her, right?

I’m not sure what else to write, so I’ll just leave it here. Please take care of yourselves. The same goes for my brother and sister.

Your daughter, (Name)’

“... I ended up writing what I really think… I need to rewrite this… again.” You sigh, leaning back in your chair as you crumble the letter. This was your fifth try, and while each one became less hostile and more casual, you weren't satisfied with any of the rough drafts to turn into a final draft.

If you weren’t married to Dion, into this family, would writing to them be easier? You shake your head. No point in having these useless thoughts. Especially as Hana comes in with a knock and your permission, rolling in your lunch.

In the end, you ended up going with Hana’s suggestion - basically saying that your husband fucked you too hard and rough last night and you needed to recover. Thanks to that, you didn’t have to change into the scarlet dress she picked out either - it was decided to be saved for the dinner you’ll have with both your husband and father-in-law tomorrow.

You already asked Hana for indigestion medicine for tomorrow.

“Thank you, Hana,” you put your stationary away and picked up the crumbled balls of paper that were failed attempts. She eyes you curiously but doesn’t comment on it. Instead she readies your lunch, placing the plates onto the table.

The thought of eating makes you sick. You could barely hold down breakfast - could you hold down lunch? Or would your body give up immediately and reject the food?

Warily looking at it, you notice two prettily wrapped up boxes - one pink with light red polka dots, the bow purple in color. The second box, a flatter one, had red wrapping paper with a tiny black hearts pattern, with the bow also black. Your heart speeds up as your gut twists painfully. If they were meant for you, they contain nothing well meant nor innocent.

“Oh, right,” Hana starts before handing both ‘presents’ to your unwelcoming arms, “Lady Maria sent these to you. I don’t know what they are, unfortunately.” With a grave look on your face you shakily thank her, a pained and forced smile stretching your lips.

Maria sent these… oh boy, I sure do wonder what they are…

“Later today, please help me pick out a gift for her. It’s only right that I repay the favor, especially since she’s my mother-in-law.” Placing them down next to your feet, you ignore the urge to kick them far, far away from you. It’s hard to keep your eyes off of the boxes. It’s hard to focus on your food, picking up your fork and knife as you cut into the grilled fish.

It’s hard to chew, accidentally biting your lip hard enough to taste blood. It’s hard to drink the water as it threatens to choke you. It’s hard to not wince at the sharp sounds of cutlery against the plate as you imagine your head being chopped off like nothing.

It’s hard to breathe.

How much longer until you go crazy?

By the time you finish your meal, you’re sweating buckets. You hate it here. You want to go home -

“My Lady, are you alright?” Hana’s voice drags you out from your thoughts, flicking your eyes to meet hers. She’s picking up the silverware and placing it back onto the tray, but quickly takes a clean napkin from it and hands it to you. You take it with shaky hands, doing your best not to drop it. Thankfully your brain didn’t lag for too long for you to realize it was for your sweat.

You pat down your temples with the white cloth.

“T-thank you… v-very much, Ha-Hana.” Why is your voice so shaky? Why are you stuttering? Hell, why are you sweating?

You already had one panic attack - you don’t need another one. Your right thumb throbs at the memory and your teeth want to clamp down on it. The bandages suddenly feel too tight around the digit and you want to rip it off so you could dig your teeth into it. You bite your lip, only worsening the newly formed wound. The taste of your own blood spreads throughout your mouth again.

You need to stop.

Your attention switches to Hana, the woman staring at you uncertainly. It wasn’t necessarily out of concern but rather confusion - just how was she supposed to comfort her master? …you’re probably putting her in a rough spot.

…right. I just need to accept my new reality… but today is not going to be that day.

Taking in a deep breath, you force your nerves to settle down - positive thoughts, positive thoughts. The sun is warm, the birds are lively, the bed is comfortable, your husband is gone -

This isn’t the first time, and clearly it won’t be the last.

“...thank you for bringing the food, Hana.” You’re not fully composed, not fully right of mind, but as the saying goes: fake it until you make it. You did it once, you managed to do it throughout the duration of the engagement, during the wedding despite feeling horrible, you did it while consummating your marriage despite being ripped open by Dion, you did it while at the tea party with Maria and Sierra, you did it last night when you told him off.

You did it back then, too.

Force yourself to smile now. Tilt your head innocently. Act happy. Act happy.

“I enjoyed it. Please give my thanks to the chief.” Your smile isn’t bright as the sun and slightly wavers. Your eyes aren’t shining brightly like stars, instead seeing past her. Your mind isn’t calm as you recall the brutality of this family that was shown and described in the story.

Fake it until you make it.

Yes, you think. Maybe you will have a conversation with Roxana.

- - -

Hana left an hour ago yet you haven’t moved from your spot. No, instead you’re staring intensely at the presents in front of you on the table. They’re pretty, a bit childish. But knowing Maria…

“...is it a trap…?” Carefully, you pick up the stereo typical present box and lightly shake it; it rattles. “Sounds a bit heavy… like a box within a box.” Curiosity gets the better of you and you gingerly untie the purple bow before ripping the wrapping paper. Despite the damn thing nearly sending you into another panic episode, it was satisfying to unwrap.

A slightly smaller box is what you see once you manage to open the outer one. It was black and had a fancy red bow. Still a good size not to be something small. Unless it was a perfume. Breathing in deeply, you undo the ribbon and take off the lid.

You’re met with a glass container roughly the size of your hand. Your heart drops at the yellow liquid inside.

It looks exactly like the aphrodisiac your mother-in-law gave Roxana in the manhwa.

“...what in the actual fuck… she’s basically telling, no, begging me to fuck her son… haha!” Your head rolls back as laughter overtakes you and shoulders violently shake. “I knew she was crazy, but fuck, how morally corrupt is this woman?”

Instead of throwing it across the room like you should, you place it down on the table. You would have slammed it down if there wasn’t a chance that just smelling it could cause your body to heat up and become needy for a thing - a person - you don’t even want.

“I’m scared to open up the other ‘present’...” in spite of that you pull at the black bow and unwrap it. You shake it - sounds like something soft. Like clothes.

Oh.

Oh no, no, no, no, no no -

“She didn’t. No fucking way… maybe it’s a sweater. Or a shawl. Gloves?”

Trembling fingers take the lid off, a pink ribbon undone easily. This time, you throw the box to the floor after seeing what it held.

A sheer black babydoll lingerie set.

“Maria Agriche… you fucking creep…,” without another thought you shut the lid on it and shoved it into one of your drawers on your side of the dresser. Away from sight, out of mind you chant in your head, slamming the drawer shut. Your cheeks feel warm as both embarrassment and disgust fill your head and chest.

… even if you wanted to sleep with him… or if you were in a healthy marriage with someone you love…

“...I could never wear that… it’s too revealing, too embarrassing.” Even in your old world you never wore such things. Not because you viewed them as dirty or slutty, but because they don’t suit you. Besides, putting in so much effort just for it to be taken off…?

‘I’m only going to ask once - would you rather keep your clothes on or off?’

“MMMMFFFF!!” throwing yourself onto the bed at the memory, scream muffled by the pillow, you mentally curse both son and mother. The son because he made your first time so horrible you’re mentally scarred and the mother because she’s a creep. More so than her own fucking son.

A few minutes later you manage to collect yourself somewhat. Dreadfully you go to the dresser to pull out the offending clothing. You don’t plan on putting it on or to hold it over your clothes to get a vague idea of it either. Just to get a better look at it.

Opening it and picking up the article of clothing, you examine it; pretty lace details on the him and breast cups, a flower pattern. It was soft as silk - clearly made from expensive materials. The straps were thin but they didn't feel too rough or stiff. Probably comfortable on the shoulders.

Not like you would know - you never tried anything like this on.

Curiosity killing the cat, you decide to see where it ends by holding it over your clothes; it barely brushes past mid thigh.

When you go to put it back you notice an envelope and panties in the box. First, you pick up the lacy underwear, frowning as you realize that somehow, someway Maria had gotten your fucking measurements. Did your mother also tell the crazed woman your three sizes… “No, she wouldn’t. Even if she was drunk, she wouldn’t tell anyone such private details.”

Carelessly dropping it into the box you grab the letter, opening it after a moment of hesitation. It takes even longer to unfold the letter. And even longer to actually read it, only for horror to come across your face and enter your heart.

‘Sierra told me it may come across as inappropriate to send such things to you… but I’m just so excited for grandchildren! Oh, but don’t feel pressured into wearing or drinking those things tonight. The aphrodisiac lasts a rather long time. Besides, considering it’s Dion, I thought you might need some help to get in the mood whenever you decide to lay with him.

- Maria’

“No. Never.”

Shoving everything back in, you shut the drawer close, making sure to hide the items underneath some layers of your… underwear…

You give up.

“Ahh, why and how did I stumbled into the scene…” You turn around only to notice the yellow liquid contained in the glass bottle. Right. You forgot about that. “Maybe I should just pour it out…”

Not once did you realize nor notice how all the fear and fright left your body and mind, instead leaving caution and annoyance in its wake.

- - -

Your husband returned at midnight, small amounts of blood splattered on his left cheek. When you look up from your book to greet him you notice that in the candlelight his eye bags seem darker. Deeper.

“...welcome…back.” Your body starts to quiver and your heart beats loud enough you could hear and feel it once you meet his eyes. Quickly scanning his person you notice he’s wearing the standard male servant uniform:

black shirt with red rimmed shoulder pads that have the Agriche crest on top, the shirt long enough to reach below his knees and splits at the hips, tied together with a brown belt at the waist. If he were to turn around you would see the family crest proudly engraved into the fabric. Blank pants that disappear into nearly knee-height boots with long, tied laces.

The last time you’ve seen him in that uniform was the first time you met him, bored expression plastered on his face as Lant introduced him with a smug smile on that disgusting face of his. All he did was shake your hand as you stood still with prayers to a God who held no love for you. With your father glancing your way every minute as you were left in some corner with your then fiance to hold a conversation that never happened. When he didn’t spare so much as a glance at you, instead staring off into space as you couldn’t take your eyes off your lap.

Wait.

No.

Maybe back then, you were too deep in your thoughts to notice that unnerving stare.

The same one he has now - looking at you as though you were his prey, scarlet eyes glowing in the candlelight, like you belonged to him and he would never change that fact. That he would never let you change it, either.

“Wife.”

The word mixed with his sleepy voice sounds like nails on a chalkboard - it makes your ears bleed and eye twitch as you hold back the grimace of how he addresses you. He only wants you because you’re a normal person.

The moment you become insane he’ll let you go.

That’s the only explanation. It has to be. That’s the only explanation your brain could come up with and accept.

You’re too scared to bring up the night before yesterday. Beads of sweat slowly roll down your temples and breathing shallow as Dion walks towards the bed, heavy boots echoing. Time stops as your heart drops once he reaches the bed, reaches you and without a single word, he grabs your right wrist and -

“What happened here?”

Oh. You forgot about your bandaged thumb.

#yandere x reader #dion agriche #dion agrece #dio agriche x reader #dion agrece x reader #yandere dion x reader #yandere dion agriche x reader #yandere dion agrece x reader #yandere dion agriche #yandere dion agrece #the way to protect the female lead's older brother #twtptflob #twtptflob x reader #yandere twtptflob #yandere the way to protect the female leads older brother #roxana #male yandere #yandere twtptflob x reader

34 notes · View notes

read-write-thrive · 3 days ago

Text

Charles Rowland Week Day Two - Chorb/Comfort

After over three decades as ghosts, you would think that Charles and Edwin would have a good grasp on what ghosts can and can’t do, or even what ghosts could or couldn’t feel, so, etc. Like, ghosts can eat, but it tastes awful. Ghosts can’t sleep at all. That sort of thing. Edwin called them “ghost rules”. Charles also called them ghost rules, but he did his best not to talk about them at all unless directly asked. He’d opened up about missing being alive and all that baggage, yeah, but no need to poke at it, alright?

But lately they’d discovered a new ghost “rule” (ability? Function? Who knows) completely on accident. You see, after the entire fiasco with Esther (and the following quest to get Niko back) the boys had been, frankly, exhausted. They’d done a lot in their thirty years but never so much in so little time. It was weird, to say the least.

“Are you guys sure you’re okay? We can stick around—“ Crystal had tried as they all but herded the girls out of the office. It was past midnight and they should’ve left hours ago, but the boys must look especially bad if their looks were anything to go by.

However, this exhaustion was wearing on the boy’s patience (well, Edwin’s, but Charles had to mediate so it was getting to him too) and frankly, they needed a break. Charles was happy to say as much.

“Nope, all good here! In fact, I think we’ve all earned some time off, so maybe take the next few days to rest, yeah? You sure you don’t want us to walk with you to the tube?” Even his face hurt from smiling, which hasn’t happened since long before he died. There was an alarm bell in the back of his head, but he felt too exhausted to have a proper look at it. He just needed a break is all.

The girls shared a look again. Is this how people felt when he and Edwin did that? Charles didn’t realise it was so annoying.

“We’ll be fine. You have my number right? If anything happens?” Crystal pulled on her coat and helped Niko with her accidentally inside-out sleeve, “And you’re sure that ancient landline even works?”

“As I’ve said, the phone was enchanted to work even without electricity. Barring extremely dire circumstances, it works.” Edwin snapped, lighter than his proper angry tone but still on the edge.

“Do you want us to call you before coming back?” Niko asked towards Edwin, but with a significant, pointed glance at Charles. Charles knew there was something in that look, too, but thinking felt a little difficult at the minute. His head kinda felt like the jar of bees. Maybe he should fish it out of the backpack to compare.

Edwin replied to Niko kinder than he’d been with Crystal but not by much. Crystal snapped at him, probably about his tone with Niko, and then those two were arguing again. Charles really should break it up so the girls could get back to their flat.

God, was this a migraine? Could ghosts get migraines? It’d be just his luck, too. Was there ghost paracetamol he could take? He’d have to dry swallow it since the drink would taste like sand—

There was a hand waving in front of his face. Someone grabbed his arm and shook him. Suddenly Edwin grabbed him by the shoulders, staring him down intently. He was saying something, too. Charles moved to smile and nod, even as he had no idea what was going on, but that seemed to make the pain spike again. He flinched against it. He crossed his arms across himself, though he couldn’t say why. Comfort? Warmth? Guess it didn’t matter much, really.

Several sets of hands were pushing him somewhere—oh, the sofa, right. That seemed like a good idea. Weren’t the girls going somewhere? Or supposed to be, at least. He assumed they were some of the other hands pushing and pulling him along.

He landed on the sofa with little grace, the bouncing making something pulse in his brain is a not nice way. Edwin was there again, hands on Charles’s cheeks and forehead as if checking for fever. It was silly—surely ghosts couldn’t get fevers, if they didn’t have bodies. Edwin knows that.

They were talking to him again. It sounded like he was underwater, sound carrying but only barely. Oh, right. Ghosts weren’t supposed to have whatever was happening now, either. That would explain Edwin’s furious note taking and fussing. Niko was up and about helping him, which meant Crystal had to be the one next to him. Turning his head felt like a bad idea, so he was glad they only had so many people in the vicinity. Process of elimination and all that.

Pain struck at his abdomen next, dull ache turning stabbing in the matter of minutes. He curled in on himself, bringing his feet up onto the sofa and his knees to his face. Clutching at his stomach, Charles squeezed his eyes shut and pressed his forehead into his knees. Maybe if he just curled up tight enough—

It was like his ears popped and every joint cracked at the same time. Charles was pretty sure it was an audible pop! too. But suddenly everything was peaceful, like he was stretched out and condensed into the best full-body hug at the same time. The world was a warm yellow, bright but comfortable. Sure he couldn’t see his friends anymore, but it was blessed relief from whatever the bloody hell that pain was and Charles was absolutely going to bask in it.

After a minute or two of adjusting, Charles realised he could almost hear what was happening in the office. Crystal and Edwin were fighting again, though now Niko seemed to be— cooing over something? Muttering reassurances? He couldn’t catch all the words, but he was pretty sure that was her “finding a literal creature and/or inanimate object adorable” voice. Who/what was she talking to? Shouldn’t she be splitting up the other two? Actually, weren’t the girls supposed to be heading home?

He wanted to ask all of that, but this blissful state didn’t grant him the power of speech, apparently. Charles’s questions came out as a humming noise instead. Surely this should be worrying him—no sight, no speech, hell he’s pretty sure no body—but it was hard to feel worried, or frustrated, or sad here. He felt so good, why would he ruin it with all that? Besides, taking a step back and being relieved of his headache gave him the chance to carefully consider what had just happened.

And he would do that. Definitely. At some point. Look, this was probably the closest he’d gotten to sleep in over thirty years, you can’t blame him for wanting to bask in it for a while, alright? Just a little bit, so Edwin doesn’t kill Crystal (or Crystal somehow double kills Edwin). A bit of rest then he’d figure out how to go back.

When Charles “popped” again, returning to the mortal plane or whatever, it was to a pile of blankets and pillows in the middle of the office, wood burning stove lit and his three best friends circled around him. Thankfully they left him enough room to not pop on top of someone.

The girls were asleep, but Edwin was instantly focused on Charles. He went so far as to scurry forward, kneeling between Charles’s flailed legs to, again nonsensically, press at his face for a fever that wasn’t there.

“Charles, you’re back! Are you alright? Do you know what happened? Lord, I— we were worried.” Edwin admitted, dropping his hands and rocking back on his heals to create a smidge more distance.

Charles, genuinely smiling this time, decided he wasn’t a fan of this embarrassment or shame or whatever it was Edwin was dealing with. So, naturally, he leaned forward and threw his arms around his best mate.

“Oh, mate, it was brills…”

—

Day two of @charles-rowland-week !! I am vvvvv sleepy rn so if there’s mistakes no there isn’t 😌 hope y’all enjoyed!

#charles rowland week #charles rowland #edwin payne #crystal palace #crystal palace surname von hoverkraft #niko sasaki #chorb #orb charles #orb charles rowland #technically the comfort is the other three building a little cushion for chorb and then sleeping around him #but that would only get explained after this and I don’t feel like writing all that #use your imagination #dead boy detectives #dbda #dead boy detective agency #save dead boy detectives

47 notes · View notes