#it’s all going to be Tim drake
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does anyone have the draw your bbygirl like this meme
#which characters should I draw for these#jk#you don’t have a choice#your welcome#dc comics#raven sketchbook#raven scribbles#it’s all going to be Tim drake
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Dick : Jasons been more, relaxed lately. It's unsettling.
Tim : Yeah, I've started spiking his water with mood stabilizers.
Dick : What
Tim : I've been thinking of doing it to the wider gotham water supply. Think about the crime rates.
#Im ngl. him disappearing in comics just to reappear and do wacky insane shit feels like hes going through the mother of all manic episodes#jason todd#dick grayson#tim drake#tim does not want to watch Jason put the batsuit on and try to convince some other poor soul to be his robin#red hood#batfam#CORRECT ME IF IM WRONG I DONT HAVE FAMILY / FRIENDS WITH MANIC EPISODES
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i love the trope of Bruce's kids being yoinked by different parent figures in their lives, and the kids knowing full well and using it to their advantage when they've got any problems with him.
Tim, pissed at Bruce: That's it, I'm staying with Shiva for the week. Cass is now my official sister 2/3 of the way.
Cass, grinning: Baby brother.
Jason, annoyed with Bruce (more than usual): 'Kay I'm gonna go bunker up with Talia for a bit before I put a bullet through you. Cya.
Damian: Say hi to her for me.
Jason, with finger guns on the way out: Will do.
Dick, needing a break from Bruce (again): If anyone needs me I'll be in Kansas.
Tim, nodding: Understandable.
Steph: Kansas?
Dick: I need Uncle Clark therapy.
Duke: Alright I'm gonna go crash at Jeff's for a bit.
Cass: B?
Duke: ... A bit overbearing. I'll tell Anissa you said hi.
Cass, grinning: Good. Bring back Grace's cookies.
Duke, laughing: Got it.
#steph genuinely goes to hang out with ivy and harley#not parents just fun#maybe selina too hahaahha#all of them go to selina tho#mother am i right#dc comics#batfam#batman#tim drake#jason todd#dick grayson#cassandra cain#damian wayne#duke thomas
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You know what would be really funny. If Jason had the most normal/conventional food taste out of his siblings (still very far from regular people’s “normal”), he’s stuck in the manor because of an injury and therefore has to witness the culinary WAR CRIMES his siblings consume for sustenance. Since there’s no Alfred to stop them anymore, they have been running rampant.
Jason: What. The fuck. Is that.
Damian, pouring out a green sludge into two cups: father and I’s breakfast smoothie, or did you hit your head hard enough to forget the concept of a smoothie?
Jason, scooting his chair away clutching his water bottle to his chest: yeah I dont know what nuclear reactive, Gotham harbour concoction you so flagrantly bestow the title of “smoothie” on but keep that shit FAR away from me
Tim: *sits down next to Jason, cracks open a can of energy drink and pours it into a glass, pouring milk on top until it reaches the brim*
Jason, with tears in his eyes looking at Dick for help:
Dick: *shrugs, shoving a fistful of dry cheerios into his mouth*
Jason: *turns his horrified gaze to Cass*
Cass: *grins at him toothily with two heaping plates of a full English breakfast sitting in front of her. He has no idea where she got it from. She is using a set of utensils for each plate.*
Jason: *stands up calmly* maybe I should stop looking for the unstable bomb I lost in the manor the other week *walks out of the kitchen, a few moments later a shrill scream is heard*
#Bruce watching it all unfold: yay :) my kids are here :)#Jason: I’m going to hunt you all for sport#Cass: *BONK*#jason waking up in the medbay: GODDAMNIT NOT AGAIN#Godzilla really fucked them up#you will not get that unless ur android im sorry#batman#dc comics#bruce wayne#dcu#batfam#batfamily#dc robin#jason todd#red hood#dick grayson#nightwing#red Robin#robin#Tim Drake#batgirl#Cassandra Cain#damian wayne#damian al ghul#incorrect batman quotes#incorrect batfamily quotes#incorrect dc quotes#text post
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“Bruce Wayne is actually a really good father and all his children are just like that” is actually my favorite flavor of batfam
#dcu#batfam#batfamily#bat kids#okay all (kinda) their names#ready set go#dick grayson#cassandra cain#cassandra wayne#jason todd#tim drake#duke thomas#damian wayne#damian al ghul#goood enough#batman#bruce wayne#gotham#10k#certified banger
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Tim: *dies* Stephanie: Timer starts now! When do you think he’ll be back? I say two months Damian: Bullshit. One month Dick: nah, half a month Bruce, sobbing: WHAT ARE YOU DOING? TIM JUST DIED! Jason, scratching his chin in thought: One week
#it doesn't matter how often this happens bruce is still devastated anytime his kids (temporarily) die#the others are upset but they just cope with humor of course#also they all know out of all of them tim is definitely not going to stay down#especially when he's got open case files#incorrect quotes#incorrect dcu quotes#incorrect batman quotes#incorrect batfamily quotes#dcu#batfamily#tim drake#red robin dc#stephanie brown#spoiler dc#dick grayson#nightwing#damian wayne#robin#bruce wayne#batman#jason todd#red hood
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I want a fic where Tim unwittingly becomes the rebellious kid after his dad dies because he has a hard time adjusting from his latchkey kid with absentee parents life to the almost constant adult supervision at Wayne Manor.
Like, Tim spent years sneaking around to do Batman shit and even when he got in trouble, if he waited long enough his parents would either leave town or forget about it.
Now he’s getting the ‘I’m not mad, I’m disappointed’ talk from Bruce for skipping school and supplementing half his meals with energy drinks and is just like: ???? Nothing has changed??
Tim gets hurt on patrol and Bruce tells him that Robin will not be out in Gotham the next night, and then gets mad when he finds Tim on a rooftop in his civies taking pictures. Tim is just like: Robin’s not out. I followed your order. What’s the problem?
Tim disappears for a few days following a lead and gets grounded for not telling anybody where he went (even though he did. It’s in the Batcomputer) and for missing school which he interprets as meaning that Robin is grounded (can’t patrol). So it’s confusing when he gets in trouble again for inviting Kon over to hang out because he’s ‘grounded’ which doesn’t even make sense because Bruce isn’t even home??
#Tim is a problem child#he just doesn’t know why#And Bruce doesn’t explain anything so this goes on way longer than it should#all of his siblings are watching his clearly break the rules and are like: damn Tim is ballsy#meanwhile Tim is just going about life as he always has and doesn’t get why it’s a problem now#tim drake#bruce wayne#batfam
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a scenario where both Bruce and Tim are out and about as civilians and end up needing a rescue from their respective Supers so Jim Gordon has to sit there and watch as Superman (fine as long as he's just visiting) and Superboy (near-identical to the former but says fuck?) carry the two Wayne family members back down to safety while simultaneously playing the "I've never met this man in my life! Just a lucky rescue! / If you even look at my human I'm going to go feral" game all the way down.
#thoughts#timkon#tim drake#red robin#bruce wayne#batman#like what are those convos like during rescues#I like to think bruce and tim just continue discussing whatever meeting they got kidnapped from#oh hey that line item on page 778 is totally wrong#clark and kon are twitching going insane#and tim and bruce do NOT have time for it#like what are you both doing here#is one superman not enough??#dc#batfamily#clark kent#superbat#superman#jim gordon witnessing all of this like#taking bets with montoya if they actually are all in relationships#or it's just misplaced tension
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batman and his merry band of robins
#slowly exploring how I want to go about drawing the batfam#dunno if I accomplished my goal exactly but trial and error and all that jazz#maybe I’ll draw the women next as a treat#dc#dc comics#batman#batfam#bruce wayne#dick grayson#nightwing#jason todd#red hood#tim drake#red robin#damian wayne#robin#batman and robin#my art#batkids#batfamily
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DCxDP AU with the typical cultists summon the ghost king stuff, except the spell is supposed to trap him in a mortal body till he agrees to do the cult's bidding.
Danny is obviously not going to just do what they say, he will find his own way out of this body he is trapped in, thank you very much.
After escaping he is found by the police and identified as Tim Drake, which okay didn't expect the human sacrifice to be a famous guy, but whatever. All he has to do is pretend to be Tim for a few days while he figures out how to break the spell. Easy, Bruce Wayne is famously stupid right?
Of course the bat family had been listening in to the cult's summoning the whole time from a communicator Tim activated right before he was captured, so they are very very aware this is not Tim.
They can't say anything though because they have no idea what powers the ghost king has or how to get him out of Tim's body. It is determined that the best solution is to play along till they have a plan so the ghost doesn't run off with Tim's body or hurt him in some way.
Thus begins a game of lies. Danny, fake it till you make it, Fenton, pretends to be Tim with only the info available on his Wikipedia page. The bats pretend to not notice anything is wrong.
Danny can't investigate how to break the spell because no one will leave him alone for any length of time. The bats are struggling to figure out how to get the ghost king out of Tim when all their magic users are saying the guy is basically all powerful.
No one is happy about any part of this.
Meanwhile Tim is playing a 5D chess version of psychological warfare on Danny while stuck inside his own head. Danny is just like, 'please have mercy I am trying to get us both out of this safely.' Tim is like, 'anyway here's wonderwall for the 40th time today.'
#danny phantom#danny fenton#dc crossover#dc comics#dc#dp#dpxdc#tim drake#dp x dc#dc x dp#dc x dp crossover#batfam#batman#my post#i just think all if them being forced to play house with each other would be funny#at least at first tim doesn't believe that danny really is stuck and thinks he can annoy danny into freeing him#danny keeps fucking up things Tim would know and the bats just pretend that his acting is great#danny thinks he fooled them but internally that hate him so much#like danny calls Dick 'Richard' because that is what is on his Wikipedia page. so they all just have to go along with it
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Young Justice my beloved
I spent far too long on this but I genuinely love all of them too much so ignore timeline continuity for who’s there 💖
And then also here are some sketches. Originally did the 4 that have hidden faces but once again I love all of the too much so I did all of them ofc
#yj98#yj#young justice#young just us#tim drake#dc robin#red robin#slobo dc#greta hayes#cassie sandsmark#cissie king jones#anita fite#kon el#conner kent#bart allen#dc impulse#superboy#kon el superboy#wonder girl#arrowette#empress dc#secret dc#uno#your honor they deserve peace#one of these days I will go on a rant about Tim and Cassie’s friendship (FRIENDSHIP PLEASE JUST FRIENDSHIP) and you will all listen#also ignore the ? next to Kent I could not remember at what point he was taken in
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Duke: "Bad news guys, he managed to give me the slip."
Tim: "How? Okay, who's got eyes on him?"
Damian: "He's just... gone."
Tim: "Hood?"
Jason, eating takeout: "Stop hacking my comms for this, I'm not even there!" *leaves the channel*
Steph: "Negative from me, I've been tailing some whole other guy."
Tim: "Nightwing?"
Dick, in a whole other city, on the computer, barely listening: "I already told Alfred I left the keys in the--"
Tim: "Thanks anyways. Orphan?"
Cass:
Tim: "Well shit. Everyone, we need to find him now."
Kate, spotting Bruce holding someone's black-haired baby at the Gala and immediately taking the baby from him: "No."
Kate, pressing a hand to her earpiece: "I got him just in time. Don't give me those puppy dog eyes Bruce, you can't even keep all your kids' names straight anymore."
Tim: "Phew, crisis averted everyone, good work. But remain vigilant."
Jason: "Tim, I swear to God--"
#batfamily#I don't even know if this makes sense lol#another obligatory ��they're all at a gala thing”#Okay roll call let's go:#Duke thomas#dc signal#kate kane#batwoman#tim drake#red robin#dick grayson#nightwing#jason todd#red hood#damian wayne#robin#stephanie brown#spoiler#cassandra cain#orphan#black bat#take your pick#bruce wayne#batman#dc comics#batfam#textpost#shitpost#batposting
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The first time, Tim notices someone observing them from afar, it is when they are all settled for a brief dinner together. It is the middle of the week, and Bruce gathered all of them together to... relax. Which is strange but not unwelcome. Everyone is so involved in chattering and bantering that they don't notice a lingering gaze through the window; they don't, but Tim does.
It takes him a few seconds to figure out that it is Jason.
He is not sure if Bruce reached for him to invite, and Jason just declined, or there was no offer to begin with, but Tim knows for sure Jason lurkes behind windows for a few minutes before disappearing in the night.
And the funniest thing? Tim understands him.
He thinks he is not Jason's replacement — never truly was, despite what the other thought — but in a way, they did swap their places. Because in the past, it was Tim, who hid on the rooftops, staring at Bruce and his family, listening to the snippets of their conversations. And now it is Jason.
It is still different, of course. Tim had a choice, and it was his... enthusiastic project, if anything — Jason doesn't really. But if anyone understands the feeling of standing far away from everyone, it is still Tim.
That's why the next time in happens, Tim reaches out.
It is after the particularly easy mission, when Tim spots the red motion on the rooftop. He slips away from Nightwing and Robin, who debate about something with Batman through the comms, and finds himself standing behind Red Hood.
The way Red Hood taps his fingertips on the balustrade makes Tim remember that he is not included in their comms anymore. He wonders how lonely it is, to hear the voices of his brothers, but never being able to grasp the whole conversation they have.
'Hood,' he calls for him.
To Jason's credit, he doesn't scramble in panic, even if it seems that he is surprised by his appearance.
'Red,' he mutters back, instantly defensive. 'What, came to mock me?'
Tim rolls his eyes; he wishes things would be easier with Jason, but they are not, and he can't really blame him for that.
'Had I ever mocked you?' He copies his stance, arms folding in the chest. When Jason tilts his head, almost asking, "Really now?" Tim rolls his eyes again. 'Okay, I did a few times. But it mostly were jokes about your death.'
Jason chuckles.
'Good one, punk. It changes everything.'
'You like jokes about your death,' Tim protests. 'And I know you allow Arsenal to joke about it, so it is not entirely closed topic.'
'I don't remember allowing you to joke about it, though.'
...
This conversation is so fucking stupid. Tim didn't even came here for this, but-
But fine. He still can win.
'So, you only allow it to your friends. Fine. Let's be friends,' Jason chokes on his own exhausted sigh. 'Do you need some friendship questionnaires to fill to be my friend? I can arrange that.'
Jason kindly flips him off under his breath before disappearing in the night, leaving him alone with whining Nightwing and irritated Bruce in his ear.
The next time he stalks down Jason, who in turn is stalking Damian and Bruce, he shoves in his hand twenty three papers filled with bunch of friendship questions — half stripped from internet, half made by Tim that involve the specifics of their jobs.
He doesn't expect anything to come after it, but in two weeks after Jason returns to the city after his mission with Outlaws, Tim finds these papers filled with surprisingly neat, calligraphic answers.
And he gets the printed copy of the same questions, with one page of an additional one, written in the same handwriting, and with a little sticky note atop of it.
Your turn, Timbo.
Tim smirks.
Oh, he will so drag Jason back in the family, somehow.
#jason's answers stuck somewhere between being some batshit lore drops and the sweetest shit ever#like yeah when he was six he witnessed a man in the neighbourhood killing his daughter... and the next answer is like OH I LOVE DOGS :(#tim gets concerned after reading bunch of his lore like poor boy yeah#BUT JASON GETS CONCERNED AFTER TIM'S ANSWERS BECAUSE WTF IS GOING ON IN HIS BRAINS?#tim also encourages jason's pettiness so now they have comm only between each other that they demonstratively use all the time#dick is restless wdym he is not included??? he is their favorite#jason messages him that tim is his favorite now#the chaos ensues#jason todd#red hood#dcu comics#dc universe#dcu#batfamily#bruce wayne#batman#batfam#dick grayson#tim drake#red robin
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Bruce Wayne is canonically a very handsome man (he is called a "pretty boy" and he is in his 40s, for fuck's sake), and he is pretty famous as a rich philanthropist who doesn't want to leave his awful cursed crime infested city. So, there must be a ton of people thirsting over him on the internet. Fancams, edits, fanfics and imagines ("kidnapped with Bruce Wayne 😍 by a Gotham rogue"), the whole charade!
And anytime one of the batkids stumbles on a thirst post, they have the most dramatic disgusted reaction, loudly gagging, before sending the link to the batkids chat, because if they must suffer, then they should all suffer. Clicking on a link in this groupchat is like playing russian roulette, and getting rickrolled is a good ending.
#bruce wayne#batman#batfam#dc comics#my ramblings#no I'm not tagging them all I want to live#being a batkid is being cursed to see everyone thirsting over your father figure as Bruce Wayne AND as Batman#tim: guys what do you think about this?#jason: FUCK U FUCK U FUCK U FUCK FUCK U FUCK U#cass: 😬🤢🤮#damian: drake your end is near#steph: thanks i'm going to bleach my eyes now#dick: this is how you treat me??? your perfect big brother who loves and cherishes you???#harper: i know i should never have given you my number#barbara build a program that block any bruce thirst content so she never gets the fright but she will send a link to one from time to time#because of his years of stalking Tim cannot escape the Bruce thirst posts they pop up all the time
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I think the Batkids reaction to a Bruce who isn't de-aged to 8 but rather 29 (pre-Jason death, post his adoption) would be fascinating.
Their reaction would vary wildly:
Dick: Oh. Bruce is soft again. Bruce calls them ‘chum’ and ‘buddy’ and gives head pats for no reason. He still isn’t perfect, his communication skills are still a work in progress, but compared to his future self? Without actively dying Dick is hugged plenty. Bruce asks him to go to the zoo, unrelated to any case, just to spend time together. Dick is hit with more nostalgia and longing for the past than he knows what to do with.
Also notable: his dad is younger than him. That is something. Second, holy existential crisis Batman, his dad is younger than him and already one adult and one teenage kid??? Dick is not ready to feel this old yet. Third, Dick has absolutely no idea how Bruce managed to stay patient through his no-pants years. He is going to thank reason every day from now on that Damian wears full protection.
Jason: After his death and League he clung to an image of Bruce. One many tried to beat out of him, but he still kept it somewhere close to his heart, buried deep enough even he couldn’t see it. When he came back Bruce wasn’t like this idea of him. How stupid of him to believe the mind of a traumatized kid. Trying to create one good thing before the kid drew his last breath. Making up memories that never even existed.
But they did. Every smile and hug and even his words reflect the image tugged safely against his still-beating heart. His dad very clearly, very deeply loves him. Which is so much worse. Because he can understand why a Bruce, who never cared, didn’t kill the Joker. But he cares. So why the fuck did he not kill the Joker?
Tim: The reason he joined the family, the reason why he became Robin in the first place was because he saw a problem when Bruce started self-destructing and thought ‘Someone needs to fix that!’. Therefore he went and collected Dick, who didn’t seem keen on fixing it. So, the job fell to him to fix it.
He thought he did a good job, he thought he fixed the problem. Except now he sees who Bruce was, and he knows he failed. Their Bruce is less soft, less affectionate, less like he was before. Batman needs a Robin and Tim didn’t manage to be good enough of one to save him.
[Or: Tim has a guilt complex a hundred miles wide and blames himself for things that aren’t his fault part 52]
Steph: Jason and she are very similar. Both come from the Narrows, both have a mother addicted to drugs and a shitty father. The differences start when Steph keeps waiting on the roof of their apartment for Batman to whisk her away, while Jason tries to steal the tires of the Batmobile and is taken in.
When Steph started out as Spoiler Bruce tried to keep her off the field, and obviously this one would too (even if he would probably be less paranoid about it), but she knows this Bruce would have also taken her in. This Bruce would be the father she always wished for when she sat on their roof and couldn’t see any stars.
And she didn’t get to have this because Jason went ahead and died. (Of course, she knows she isn’t fair to the guy. Dying isn’t fun… And she knows the only reason she lived is because he died. When Batman rescued her from Black Mask she was in such terrible shape that Leslie managed to convince the World’s Greatest Detective that she died. If Jason hadn’t died Bruce wouldn’t have been as paranoid, wouldn’t have noticed her missing so soon, wouldn’t have been as urgent in his response. Would have been just a minute slower, a minute which would have killed her. Just as it had Jason.)
For her, this Bruce is a distorted mirror into a past which never was.
Cass: This Bruce and B are not the same person. They don’t move the same. In a fight, this Bruce is younger, faster, stronger. Doesn’t compensate for a previously broken spine. Less experienced. Still one of the most experienced she knows, but less.
He still moves differently, outside a fight, less pain. More likely to engage in physical affection, more likely to hug and pat and talk. He talks more than B. B knows what she means without words. This Bruce doesn’t.
She likes this Bruce, warmth, and softness. But not as much as B. He knows what she means, when she wants a hug, when she tells him ‘I love you’ without words. B doesn’t need words. This Bruce doesn’t know her, doesn’t communicate like her. She wants B back.
Damian: At first, when this version of his father seemed uncanny and oddly familiar, he assumed it to be due to the stories of his mother. After all, she always told him tales about his father. He simply did not have the frame of reference to understand the kindness she spoke of. Clearly, the clash between the ideals of the League and the ones of his father causes these feelings, just as they did when he first entered the manor.
He presumed this to be the case until one day on patrol Batman laid a hand on his shoulder and told him he did a good job after no particularly impressive fight and he nearly called him ‘Grayson’. Because the stories of his mother may have painted the picture of this version of his father, however, it wasn’t what made it familiar; no, he knew this kindness. These hugs and compliments one would bestow upon a child. Compliments which, despite the indignity, still warm him. Because Grayson learned how to be a… caregiver from his father.
His father used to be like Grayson, used to be until his grief hardened him. Damian could have had this. Damian could have a brother and father who would- But he doesn’t because of Todd. He loathes Todd. Loathes him for ruining the life he could have had.
Why did he die anyway? Damian certainly wouldn’t have a problem escaping bonds created by the Joker, Damian would have disarmed the bomb in time, Damian would have never thrown this life away like he did.
[Or: Damian is a child who was raised by assassins and has unreasonable standards for fighting abilities and also is a child who needs to focus his rage on someone.]
Duke: He was neither there before Jason died nor in the aftermath [according to my math he was around 4 when Jason died] he joined the family when Jason was already back for 4 years or so. He mostly skipped all the drama. For him, Bruce is the way Bruce is because he is Bruce. It’s weird to see him so different, to see how grief shaped parts of Bruce which Duke assumed were just Bruce things.
He’s glad this Bruce is brighter, or not because it just highlights how much that light will dim? Who knows, certainly not him.
What he does know is that, with their Bruce, he has a distance which, with his parents still alive, he appreciates. With this Bruce, he can understand why Dick struggled so much whether he wants to be his ward or son, how he doesn’t want to replace his parents but still have this Bruce as a dad. It definitely explained the ted talk Dick tried to give him after Bruce officially took him in as a ward.
He likes this Bruce well enough, but he doesn’t necessarily want him to stay this way. Yes, their Bruce is less happy, less open but he did heal, he did grow. Duke met a Bruce who tried to learn from his mistakes, learned to communicate better, and learned when to pull and when to push. For Tim, Damian, Dick, and certainly Jason there is too much baggage, too much history in their relationships, it’s difficult for them to ever move past- anything really.
Sure, when Dick and Bruce are on the same page they are essentially invincible but then the past catches up again and they don’t talk to each other for months. And honestly? Apart from Cass, Duke’s pretty sure he has one of the best relationships with Bruce simply because he got to know him at a better time.
Duke doesn’t mind this Bruce. But their Bruce loved Jason, cared for him so deeply the scars still show to this day. And he still chooses to open up again even if just a bit by bit. Even if just Duke can see it. He is used to being the only one that can see.
And maybe knowing this care extends to him, this love even grief can’t shake? Maybe it makes him feel just a little bit safer, a little bit warmer, a little bit brighter.
#Anyway Alfred is just very sad.#Also i like to believe Bruce learned from each of his kids#just that Dick wanted space and Jason closeness#Tim just wanted Bruce to be more careful and steph wanted him to do more#and bruce kind of tried to learn and then applied the thing that would have been amazing for one kid for another who hates it#by now he kind of gets that one solution isn't going to work for all his kids.#but his relationships are already strained#bruce wayne#jason todd#cassandra cain#dick grayson#tim drake#damian wayne#duke thomas#batfam#batfamily#stephanie brown#batdad#de aging#fic ideas#batman#i have thoughts on Steph & Jason parallels#most of them come from writers not caring about steph but still#that makes them even more interesting to me
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The idea of the batkids scaring Bruce with “a new grandchild” to only show an animal is so funny to me, because imagine Bruce is so used to it that when Jason wants to introduce him to his new grandchild Bruce almost falls out of his chair when there’s an ACTUAL KID!
Dick: You’re a granddaddy now Brucie!!!
Bruce: WHAT?!? Who?? When??? How??? Actually don’t tell me how. Who is she??? When did she give birth???
Dick: What? No, meet my kid *holds up a cat* her name is biscuit and shes the love of my life!
—
Steph: Cass and I are adopting…
Bruce: Holy shit, actually???
Cass: Yes, it was a tough choice, but we want to adopt
Bruce: Do you need any help with paperwork and stuff? It’s kinda my thing. Also consider the fact that you might be too young.
Steph: Too young…?
Bruce: Yes, I mean you’re only in your 20’s, are you sure you can handle a kid?
Cass: Too young for an iguana?
—
Damian: It happened again, I have a kid.
Bruce: What do you mean AGAIN?!?
Damian: This is my second kid, duh
Bruce: Are you talking about goats?
Damian: Of course I am father
—
Tim: BRUCE YOU’RE GOING TO BE A GRANDFATHER!!!
Bruce: Tim I didn’t think I was going to have to tell you this again after the whole thing with Stephanie, but just kissing someone doesn’t get them pregnant
Tim:
Bruce: Is it a dog?
Tim: No it’s a tiger
—
Jason: I have something to tell you
Bruce(not looking up from his paperwork): Okay, what’s up?
Jason: I have a kid, I want you to meet your granddaughter
Bruce: I can’t possibly imagine what type of animal you’ve gotten, but I’d love to meet her
Jason: What the hell are you talking about?
Bruce (looking up to see an actual child): You actually have a kid????
Jason: Yeah, Roy and I thought it was time I adopted Lian
Lian: Hi Grandpa!!!
Bruce: I’m going to faint, grab me some ice will you?
#this has been sitting in my drafts for months now all because i didnt want to tag it#my adhd kicked in#i wrote it all in one go then decided i had better things to do than tags#then i reread it multiple times and decided therr are better things to do than tags#but its just so silly so im manning up and doing it!#here are my awful half alseep tags#that was it#bruce wayne#batman#jason todd#roy harper#damian wayne#tim drake#dick grayson#lian nguyen harper#jason is lians dad obviously#cassandra cain#stephanie brown#stephcass#dc comics#dcu#dc#batkids#man i love batman
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