#Duke thomas

[vodrae]

Damian is behind the couch where the family is watching TV, hitting the "that show is so stupid" pose, but won't move. Big city girl is falling in love with country boy.

Suddendly Bruce enters the room: "Kids, that Christmas Eve we are with the Kents. Pack your luggaes we're going to Smallville."

Damian: NO WE'RE NOT !

[incorrectbatfam]

who has a total ban from the kitchen, a partial ban and who is allowed?

(writing a fic, its a passing line but im stucked bc im getting second thoughts every time i place a character in a category, thank you very much)

Allowed:

Alfred, by default

Dick, because he canonically can cook

Luke, because he buys the best ingredients

Bette, because she's hardly ever there

Kate, because she doesn't care enough to use it

Barbara, because she can work the smart fridge

Cullen, because he needs it emotionally

Duke, because he hasn't done anything yet

Conditionally allowed:

Jason, if he doesn't order takeout and claim credit for making it like he would in canon

Helena, if she doesn't launch into a food history lecture

Damian, if he needs a vegetarian snack

Steph, if she doesn't openly one-up Alfred's waffles

Carrie, if she doesn't recreate the candy spaghetti from Elf

Harper, to fix the oven

Banned:

Cass, for her mega-pie

Tim, for telling his friends to help themselves

Bruce, to comply with the Geneva Conventions

Verdict's still out:

Selina, because her food is great but she uses Ivy's mutant produce

[nyukaart]

My take on the batkids:333 this is just a ref sheet for me hehe

[psychemochanight]

That post I saw once of everyone wanting to be Dick's favorite lives rent-free in my head.

Damian: We all know I'm the favorite. He chose me as HIS Robin.

Tim: Only because he sees me as his equal. He thinks highly of me and I'm the only one of you who knows more about him.

Jason: Yes, because you stalked him for years and you continue to do so.

Tim: That's not-

Jason: Obviously I'm the favorite. He's happier to see me than any of you when I come to these stupid family gatherings.

Tim: Just because that way he's sure you're not out there doing something stupid, asshole.

Cass: It's me he taught how to cook.

Steph: I don't think you'll get any points for burning down his kitchen while making pancakes. Me, on the other hand...

Duke: You don't even spend time with him. I'm probably the only one of you who bothers to talk to him and ask how he's doing.

Jason: Yeah, and you hated him too because he was a cop for a few months.

Duke: Fuck off, man. You know my problem with cops.

Damian: There is only one way to fix this. FATHER!

Bruce, who was listening to everything in silence: Yes?

Damian: Who is Dick's favorite?

Bruce, with a slightly arrogant tone: well...

Tim: No, there's no way it's you. Don't even say it.

Bruce: It's me who...

Jason: Just because he has that strange devotion to you that seems like Stockholm Syndrome doesn't make you his favorite.

Bruce: Stockh... What?!

Tim: Yes, you are out of the game, totally. Alfred! Who is Dick's favorite?

Alfred: That's probably me, young sir.

Tim:

Jason:

Damian:

Cass:

Duke:

Steph:

Bruce:

Steph: Who is his second favorite?

Babs, connecting the loudspeakers: It's me, obviously.

All batkids: NO YOU'RE NOT.

Dick: My favorite family member? Oh! Donna, she's my Wonder Twin!

[platitudinalteen]

Dyingggg. I bet he also gets frustrated when someone leaves the fridge open too long and it starts beeping. Or wears the tread way down on his shoes but doesn't replace them until there's literal holes because they're still good, even if they're not in perfect condition.

Duke spent all his childhood and most of his teenage years in a middle class family, so I like to think that he carried these habits into his rich life as well.

Example 1:

Duke: who the fuck is wasting our water? Do you know how expensive the bill will be next month?

Tim: Do you know that even if we had opened all the taps in the manor, Bruce would still have no problem paying for them for at least the next ninety years?

Duke, closing the faucet: yeah, what's your point?

Example 2:

Duke: It's literally a rip-off! Six dollars for a fucking yogourt?! Nah, let's go Cass, bet I can find an analog for three.

Cass, handing him the hundred dollar bill that Bruce gave them to buy two yogourts (he didn't know the price and just hoped that it was enough): ?

Duke, dragging her out of the store: It's a principle now, let's go.

Example 3:

Dick, accidentally dropping his phone: oopsie-

Duke, without thinking: of course, go on and break it. We are all billionaires here, aren't we?

Dick, pretty much confused: well, technically…

Duke: I see you, victim of capitalism.

He also constantly turns off the lights when someone leaves the room for more than 0,5 seconds, because it pisses him off.

[kartsie]

Post patrol goofing

[automaticsoulharmony]

Sorry Jean Paul (I’m not)

Inspired by this post and this one

[azure-tiamat]

This happened. It had to; just as it had to happen that this be reposted.

If there's any scale to operations/ missions planned by Batman, is how many of his kids are out on the playground.

Gotham is a small doomsday area and they are it's own Justice League. For them to all show up, it's definitely the end times. Red Hood being last makes sense, though Spoiler and Signal has me laughing. Though, what level of threat are we talking if Batman were to bring his own rogues on the field? Blackmail, redeemed, etc?

I bet the JL has a “how fucked are we” metric that’s literally just how many of Bruce’s kids are there.

Like if he pulls up to the alien invasion or whatever with just Robin, then everything’s fine. More than fine, actually, because Bruce feels comfortable enough to bring his eight year old along for the ride. This battle will take approximately fifteen minutes and they’ll all get shawarma after. Not fucked in the slightest.

But if Red Robin shows up too… hmm, okay, this is getting somewhat serious. Tim is one of Bruce’s most trusted partners; he’s the smart Robin, the tactician, the loyal one, and so if Batman brought him along then it means he’s at least a little bit worried about shit hitting the fan and wants one his advisors around. But the combined brain power of Bruce and Tim is pretty much unmatched (DC plot armor for the win), so everything will be fine, basically. Superman might take a hit, but everything’s going to be fine. Just keep calm and you’ll all make it home in time to Door Dash some Panda Express before it closes. So not that fucked.

It starts to get serious after that. When Signal and Spoiler roll up the scene, shit has definitely hit the fan. Batman’s worried enough to call in reinforcements and he’s probably doubting the League’s ability to listen/obey his orders, so he needs a backup plan in case things go really south. But with Signal’s abilities and Steph’s superpower of turning anything into a joke, chances are you’ll be okay. Maybe impaled or something, but okay. But still, fucked.

When Nightwing shows, the JL knows it’s starting to get dicey out on the field. See, Nightwing’s got his own team, his own issues—the fact that he set that all aside to help out his dad is cause for concern. On a scale from 1-10, they are at a 7. Above moderately fucked.

And… oh God. Black Bat? Most of the time the JL doesn’t even see her, but once she makes herself known and starts fighting alongside her siblings, they all start to silently freak out. Black Bat is a fucking machine and if she’s breaking a sweat trying to fight the Big Bad, things are definitely not going to go well. They start praying that Batman figures something out. They freak out. They are intrinsically fucked.

But God Forbid you catch sight of the Red Hood. The prodigal son is a legitimate killer, and if Batman’s letting him blow out brains then the JL knows he’s desperate. And a desperate Batman is not good. At all. They are definitely fucked.

[jasonsthunderthighs]

Dick: Which one of you was goin to tell me tea tastes different if you put it in HOT water?

Bruce: You're puttin it in cold water?!

Damian: Grayson. Answer the question, Grayson!!

Dick: Yea, I thought for like five years that people just put it in hot water to speed up the ✨Teaification Process✨

Dick: Didn't realise there was an actual reason.

Tim: You don't have the patience to microwave water for three minutes?!

Jason: Why are you puttin it in the microwave to boil it???

Tim: Do you think I have the patience to boil water on a stove?!

Jason: It takes less than a minute!!

Tim: Jason, is your stove powered by the fuckin sun?!

Jason: HOW LONG DOES IT TAKE TO BOIL A CUP OF WATER ON THE STOVE?!

Tim: LIKE SEVEN MINUTES!

Jason: Just stick the mug on top of the stove on medium heat. And it boils in like two minutes. Less than that and you use a saucepan.

Tim: You're puttin the whole mug on the stove on medium heat?! YOUR STOVE IS ENCHANTED!!!

Duke: Every single person in this place is a fuckin lunatic.

Alfred: DO NONE OF YOU OWN A FUCKIN KETTLE?!

[eggfriedricedwasian]

I need more Tim protects his family from any racist, homophobic, what not comments.

Like Tim, who is white, non-religious, and queer takes all the negative comments towards him and just steers it past him. So people comment about him a lot, because he just doesn't care and lets it happen.

But then someone comments something about the color of Damian's and Dick's skin, the scarred face of Jason, a stereotype of Cass, called Duke a thug, talked bad about Bruce being a Jew? Oh just consider your life over with.

He will publicly humiliate you. He will grill into you so hard your bones will be scorched black. He will break your company down. He will make you bankrupt. He will expose all of your secrets. Ruin your marriage. Ruin your family. Ruin your image.

Mess with Tim Wayne all you want, but if you mess with the rest of the Waynes, just expect Janet Drake's sole child, her carbon copy, Tim Drake, to appear and put your life to shambles.

It is no joke that Tim Drake is far more protective of his family than Tim Wayne is of himself.

Janet and Jack Drake's forthcoming comes in the way of Tim Drake destroying your life entirely, digging up your secrets and uprooting your company at one small discriminatory comment towards his family.

[xy-ale]

[kisnroses]

Also Dick got him arrested and leveraged Duke's fear of heights, anyway I kinda wanna reread Robin Wars now

Tim: do you guys ever think about the fact that we’ve all hated someone here at one point?

Jason: what the hell are you talking about?

Tim: well, Dick you hated Jason when he first became Robin, right?

Dick: uhh, yeah I guess?

Tim: and Jason, you hated me when you came back from the dead.

Jason: I mean sure. I mostly hated B for replacing me and I took it out on you. But sure

Tim: I hated Damian when he first became Robin and he hated me

Damian: hm

Dick:I guess I see where you’re going, but what about Duke? He’s out of the loop isn’t he?

Tim: no. He hated you.

Dick: WHAT? You hated me Duke? Why???

Duke: you’re a cop dude… you know I hate cops

Dick: oh yeah i totally forgot that

Jason: HA! Get wrecked goldie

[cryiaw]

The batfam doodles I owed

Fav batsiblings me thinks

I need to draw them more, THERELL BE MORE

Andd here’s a comic bc I couldn’t stop finding parallels between them and it was eating me alive I love them sm

No, I don’t CARE if it’s ooc, I LIKE IT AND THATS WHAT MATTERS, THXX

That’s all :3

[irl-batsignal]

3

Week old

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