#jim gordon witnessing all of this like

[frownyalfred]

a scenario where both Bruce and Tim are out and about as civilians and end up needing a rescue from their respective Supers so Jim Gordon has to sit there and watch as Superman (fine as long as he's just visiting) and Superboy (near-identical to the former but says fuck?) carry the two Wayne family members back down to safety while simultaneously playing the "I've never met this man in my life! Just a lucky rescue! / If you even look at my human I'm going to go feral" game all the way down.

[i-smoke-chapstick]

‘COME ON EILEEN!, [PART THREE]

-GOTHAM!VICTOR ZSASZ X READER-

⋆ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 ; Victor isn’t going to let anyone touch his girl. Especially not Jim Gordon.

⋆ tags/warnings. GOTHAM!victor x female reader. This is a 4 part fic. AGE GAP ROMANCE! (reader is still in highschool). Some angst with a happy ending. Gaurd dog Victor. PROTECTIVE VICTOR! Reader is sad. Victor just wants to protect her. Like, you're his world. You just realized it. Set during season 1. Violence.

⋆ 'PART ONE, - 'PART TWO, - 'PART THREE, - 'PART FOUR,

♫ “You're grown (a grown up), So grown (so grown up), now I must say more than ever.” Come On Eileen by Dexys Midnight Runners

You listen to his confirmation and brighten up. You can sense the strange lack of wit in his words, and it frightens you in the same way it excites you. He believes in you. You repeat it like a mantra in your head. This hitman, sadistic homocidal maniac, as Jim eloquently put it, believes in you more then Jim ever did. Believes you’re worth more than everyone elses horrible secrets.

You think about what you said. You don’t even believe in yourself. Be an assassin. You didn’t even know how to shoot a gun until a few hours ago. You think Victor must be joking, but you read no humor in his tone. That dry sarcasm that flits into his speech was completely erased. Devoid of anything at all, except sincerity.

You turn to look at him, about to speak- about to ask a million questions. Would he take you under his wing? What about school? What about Jim? What about the people you’d have to kill?

Surprisingly, none of that seems to matter. And your voice dies on your tongue. You realize he’s been looking at you this whole time. When you meet his gaze, he doesn’t flick his eyes away. He’s lost in his own head, and you understand he’s thinking too. You’d trade an arm and a leg to find out what he was thinking. Regret for believing in you? No. Victor is shockingly honest. You’d learned that in the past few hours too. When your form was horrendous, he’d let you know. There was no sugar coating with him.

His brown eyes are distant, far off. You shift under his gaze and realize it makes you uncomfortable.

But not in a bad way.

No, it’s in the type of way you felt back home, when a dumb crush you had stared at you. The feeling of being mutually noticed and scrutinized. A pit drops in your stomach. What the hell was he thinking?

You two stare at eachother, and look into eachothers eyes. His ever longing gaze falls to your lips, and you slowly start to digest whats about to happen.

Your faces inch closer and closer together. Your high on adrenaline, on the idea your worth something. He’s inexplicably high on you.

A glove hand comes up to your face, cradling it. The city lights hit his eyes just right, you realize. The cool leather on your face makes your breath hitch.

Your not sure what’s happening, if this is a weird fling for him. His mouth is shut tight, and the lines in his forehead crease. You’re sure he’s going to kiss you in some strange turn of events-

His glove hand is placed over your mouth.

You give a short noise of surprise, muffled by his hand. Your eyes widen from there dazed state, and the moment is ruined. Of course he wasn’t going to kiss you. What were you thinking?!?

You stare at him, bewildered. Silently asking for an explanation. After a few seconds, he takes his hand off your mouth, and brings his finger to his lips. He’s shushing you. He nods down, and you follow his gaze to the stumbling men of Maroni. Ah. So that must of been what he was thinking about.

You feel your heart beating out of your chest. Show time. This could be the day you die.

“Okie dokie,” he whispers. “Time to boogie.” He says casually, repositioning himself off the ledge. You give him a slow nod.

The sound of Maroni’s men is loud. They laugh, open mouthed- obviously oblivious to your presence. Your heart beat slows down, and you realize- this is what you were made for. You wanted a purpose- you got it. If you make it out of this alive, you could be an assassin. With Victor, you try to brush that last part out of your mind.

You refocus yourself. You could be more than a resource. No, you could do more. Prove to Jim what happens when you don’t treat people with at least a little mutual respect. No wonder Penguin was asking for favors in return. He knew his worth. Something you lacked knowing, until now.

You follow in Victors footsteps like a baby bird, ready to leave the nest. You throw your legs back, and settle yourself onto the rooftop.

You and Victor share a gaze, and you flash him a smile.

Something in his eyes dies a little bit.

“You ready?” You ask him, as if he’s the rookie. The ghost of a grin on his face is lef, but it quickly dissapears, and your eyebrows furrow.

“…You’re staying here.”

Scilence passes over the two of you.

You physically recoil.

“What the hell are you talking about?” You whisper, trying to internalize his words. Again, theres no humor in them. You damn near choke.

You feel heat rising in your body. Anger. Memories of Jim telling you to stay behind.

Victor just nods at your words, repeating himself.

“You’re staying here.” He reaffirms, voice more gruff, as if he’s impatient. Your mouth drops a little at the audacity. His eyes suddenly look terrifying. Is he trying to scare you? Or is this just how he looks when he’s pissed? You flinch under his glare.

“You said- No, Falcone said, I have to go with you?!? You- you saw! I’m a good shot! I can do this!” You speak, and remember how you sounded begging to Jim to help more. Childishly, your voice rises from a whisper yell into something much, much louder- and his eye twitches.

He flinches in anger, roughly nodding down to Maroni’s men, as to tell you to shut up. You feel scolded.

Betrayl rips through you. So he didn’t think you had what it takes. What would Falcone say? Or was this Falcone’s plan all along? Have Victor leave you here, teach you some fucked up lesson about what happens when you trust people who just want to use you for what you have to offer. Would he kill you when he gets back? Have some other goon on stand-by to finish the job while Victor did the real killing? Were you just an organized collateral? Good for one bit of information, and then sent to die.

The more existential part of your anxiety is soothed, when Victor takes out a pistol. The same one pointed at you earlier. His finger is no where near the trigger, and he hands it to you.

You stare at him, shakily taking it from his hands.

“Protect yourself until I get back. Remember what I taught you.” He speaks, just below a whisper. His gaze is torn off you, unable to look at you and your damn sad puppy dog eyes. He knows what he’s doing.

You watch in scilence as he turns on his heel, pulling two more signature pistols from his suit jacket. He dissapears from the rooftop, and leaves you in your own sulk.

You want to cry, but nothing comes out. You stare at the pistol for a few moments, fiddling with the trigger.

No. You think. I can do this. I’ll prove it.

Before you find it in yourself to stop, you’re following in Victor’s footsteps again, down the stairs of the rooftop.

The lights of the warehouse are dark. You attempt to stick to the shadows. There’s no sight of Victor, and you assume he must be outside, taking care of the men out there.

It’s a big empty space, and you’re surrounded in darkness. You feel your heart hammer beside yourself, and the grip on your gun is shakey. You hear numerous gunshots from outside, and your suspicions are confirmed. You know he can take care of himself, but a strange protectiveness wells up in you. You hope Victor’s okay.

You’re brought out of your thoughts when you feel a grip on your neck. You’re pulled into a tall body, back whisked against it. There’s a knife to your throat, and a quiet rat-like voice fills your ears.

“Falcone’s got rookies doing his dirty work now, boys.” The nasally tone chuckles, and you feel sick. Your breathing speeds up, and you hear the other shallow laughs of at least three other men.

Remember your training. You affirm. WWVD. What would Victor do.

You feel the knife gear up to slice your throat wide open, and you kick your head back. It sends the man flying behind you.

In an instant, you forget all about how these are people. Parents of your “friends”. Your fingers clench around the pistol, and you turn around, shooting directly at the man, just like a stop sign. He falls to the ground instantly, brains blown out.

He looks like the student you saw, face beaten in. You don’t care. You still have something to prove.

The other men look stunned, and your chest heaves. You point your gun wildly, shifting from one to another. They put there hands up. You realize they are unarmed. Idiots, you think. So egotistical, thinking men in numbers and pocket-knives would be enough to save them. They truly didn’t believe they’d get caught anytime soon.

You hear them beg for their lives. You just snarl. No, you think. You definitely could be an assassin. You definitely could be a killer. You were not an informant. No, you had a job to do. A real job; by order of Carmine Falcone. Zsasz and Gordon be damned.

You shot them all dead.

There bodies twitch underneath you, and you don’t stare in horror. No, this feels a hundred times better than a stop sign. You feel useful. First hand. You did this. You did something. And you’re proud.

Watching the bodies on the floor, you hardly realize the flickering lights of a single police car. You don’t hear the call of,

“GCPD! Put your hands up!”

You catch your breath, and feel your fingers only tighten around the gun. You whip around, still in position. No, you’re protecting yourself.

Your vision is blurry from the strong sudden flourescents of the lights. You squint, and make out a single cop. Or rather, a single detective. Jim fucking Gordon.

He stares at you, and he seems a bit bruised himself. Scuffs on his forehead and a bloody bruise on his cheek from fighting. You look at the gun pointed at you. The guns pointed at eachother.

You must look scared. Your previous confidence is replaced with something vulnerable. Intimate. You’re sure you look mousy, hair ruffled, blood sprayed, cheeks pink. Your body is small underneath Jim’s, and you struggle to look him in the eye.

“Y/N. Put the gun down.” He states, firm. He looks at the bodies on the floor. You don’t flinch.

“So you can arrest me?” You fire back, “So I can end up in Blackgate with all the people I helped put in there?”

He doesn’t falter, still in position. But he doesn’t speak.

“Think about it Jim. What I just did,” You nod to the bodies. “I helped! I did more than you ever let me believe I could! And if you arrest me, I’m going to die in that prison, Jim. You know that!” You speak, earnest. It’s true. Sooner or later, everyone would connect the dots. Find out who you are. Criminals would have a bounty on your head for exposing them. Best case scenario, you’d get beat to death in prison if you were lucky.

Theres something sad in Jim’s eyes, dissapointment. You feel tears pool in yours.

“You need me!” You plead with him, “Put the gun down! Let me walk! And I can keep helping you!”

He shakes his head.

“You really think Falcone’s ever gonna let you come back into the precint? Ever let me see you again?” Jim’s voice is breaking. You register his words. “Y/N, you belong to him now. You’re a criminal. You made your choice.”

You gape at him, trying desperately to push his words out of your head. Tears flow freely down your cheeks, and you feel him closing in on you. Subconsciously, your hand begins to drop the gun. Jim breathes a sigh of relief at you, through sad eyes. Gotham’s hero. You think, bitterly. Your only friend.

The gun has almost completely slipped from your hands. You’ve already lost. You faltered.

Until you hear the click of a gun. And look up to hear a familar voice.

“Hey Jimbo.” Victor speaks, gun pressed to Jim’s temple. Jim pauses, but his grip on his pistol doesn’t. Victor speaks through gritted teeth, turning to press it harder into his head. “Drop it. Now.”

His voice is low, and threatening. Ah, you get it now. This is the sadistic homocidal maniac.

You can’t register anything thats happening clearly. Jim reluctantly drops the gun on the ground, hands going up in surrender. You heave a sigh of relief.

You realize, Victor is not yeilding. You thought he’d run with you. No. He keeps his gun pointed firmly at Jim. And you feel panic rising inside of you. You don’t want your only friend…if you can still call him that…dead.

“Victor.” You breathe, and he doesn’t look at you. His gaze is hard, eyes wide in alert as he focuses the gun further into Jim. “Victor, please.”

You plead with him. Jim is deadly silent.

“Victor, don’t kill him. He’s the only friend I have.” You beg, and Victor’s eye twitches, as if the sentiment makes him even angrier. He finally looks at you.

“I told you stay on the rooftop.” He grits out.

“…You also said I could do this.” You nod, to the bodies around you.

You two argue like a lovers quarrel, Jim stares intently, holding his breath. He’s realizing the extent of your feelings for eachother before even the two of you do. He makes a mental note. Zsasz has a weakness, and it’s you. The quiet, desperate, small girl he met that faithful day on campus.

Thankfully, before Jim can internalize just how useful this information is, a gun hits him square in the head, knocking him out. You whisper a quiet thank you to Victor, who had opted for roughly knocking him unconscious. For now. Victor thinks. He’ll kill Jim for pointing a gun at you. Eventually. When your officially his girl.

He grabs you by your arm, pulling you up. The sounds of more police sirens ring out. Jim called back up.

You look at Victor, trying to think it through. Why did he protect you? Why didn’t he let Jim arrest you?

Before you get the chance to ask, he’s dragging you along, sneaking through a back entrance. Hes silent the whole time, and you catch a glimpse of the five fresh cuts littered into his forearms.

When the two of you finally cross over, running hand in hand into an alleyway, he pushes you back into the building. It’s still dark outside, and the only thing you can make out is the glint in his black eyes from the streetlamps.

He looks at you, scanning you over, just like he did when you met him. Which you can’t seem to believe was just this morning.

You bite your lip, and search his eyes.

They are worried for you. Protective. A dark gaze connects to yours, and you swallow.

You get it. You get it now.

He’s in love with you.

[in-the-moodboard]

Bat fanfic recommendations

Bruce Wayne - Venn Bruce by icarus_chained

General Audiences - J'onn J'onzz/Bruce Wayne; Selina Kyle/Bruce Wayne; Clark Kent/Lois Lane; Alfred Pennyworth & Bruce Wayne; Clark Kent & Bruce Wayne; Jim Gordon & Bruce Wayne

In a quiet moment, in bed with his lover, Bruce considers the sum of his parts, the people who had helped shape it.

Kate Kane - If I Never Tell You by LesbianArsenal

Teen And Up Audiences - Diana (Wonder Woman)/Kate Kane

Kate Kane isn't used to being flustered, but she finds herself exactly that every time she's in the presence of a certain Amazonian Princess. Who wouldn't be, she justifies. But when a demonic threat enters Gotham, she starts seeing more of Wonder Woman, and much more of the woman behind that title.

Bette Kane - hate to see you like a monster by flamebirds

General Audiences - Bette Kane & Charlotte Gage-Radcliffe; Tim Drake & Bette Kane; Duela Dent & Bette Kane

The Joker's Daughter has kidnapped Huntress and there has only ever been one person that Batwoman would turn to.

Damian Wayne - Damian Wayne v. The World by superstar_socrates

Teen And Up Audiences - Bruce Wayne & Damian Wayne; Duke Thomas & Damian Wayne; Cassandra Cain & Damian Wayne; Mia "Maps" Mizoguchi & Damian Wayne; Alfred Pennyworth & Damian Wayne; Talia al Ghul & Damian Wayne; Stephanie Brown & Damian Wayne

Damian Wayne's second semester at Gotham Academy begins by being roped into playing the titular character of Shakespeare's Macbeth. Meanwhile, Batman and Robin come to a horrifying realization regarding a series of murder victims.

Barbara Gordon - Being Wanted (The Aggravated Assault Remix) by Mara

Teen And Up Audiences

Oracle gets a little tired of being on call.

Jean-Paul Valley - in space (all I think about is you & me) by KathrynShadow

General Audiences - Luke Fox/Jean-Paul Valley

It starts out as a tickle at the back of his neck, the Azrael armor’s contacts embedded in his nervous system reacting to his new suit detecting something.

Cassandra Cain - do I dare disturb the universe? by Hinn_Raven

Teen And Up Audiences - Cassandra Cain/Christine Montclair; Stephanie Brown & Cassandra Cain; Cassandra Cain & Bruce Wayne; Cassandra Cain & Duke Thomas

Cassandra Cain was falling, and there were stars. When she landed, she found herself stranded in a universe where there never was a Batman. Good thing that she’s a detective.

Tim Drake - to find a town where we can live by batwitches (goodwitches)

Teen And Up Audiences - Tim Drake & Dick Grayson; Tim Drake & Dick Grayson & Jason Todd

“Tim, do you want to go home?” And his little brother, all scathing wit and teenage nonchalance, replies, “Don’t ask me that,” and walks out the kitchen door without looking Dick in the eyes. A seventeen-year-old Tim Drake leaves Gotham in the rearview mirror, catches a bus to New York, and moves into his brother's shitty Hell's Kitchen apartment. It's hard to be an adult when you've never been a kid.

Stephanie Brown- These Twists and Turns of Fate by Hinn_Raven

General Audiences - Stephanie Brown/Cassandra Cain; Stephanie Brown/Tim Drake; Harper Row/Carrie Kelley; Stephanie Brown & Harper Row; Stephanie Brown & Jason Todd; Stephanie Brown & Damian Wayne; Stephanie Brown & Cassandra Cain; Stephanie Brown & Crystal Brown; Stephanie Brown & Tim Drake

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Helena Bertinelli - Robins are an Invasive Species by Havendance

General Audiences - Helena Bertinelli & Tim Drake; Tim Drake & Dick Grayson; Helena Bertinelli & Barbara Gordon; Jack Drake & Tim Drake

Team up with a teen vigilante once and you'll never get rid of him again. Helena didn't sign up for any of this.

Dick Grayson - soft clocks by dustorange

General Audiences - Dick Grayson & Bruce Wayne; Dick Grayson & Damian Wayne; Dick Grayson & Tiger

Side effects of being revived by Lex Luthor may include amnesia, going undercover into a high-level espionage agency, not recognizing your family, fighting your family, and dealing with the emotional weight and guilt associated with encountering said family. Ask your doctor if being revived by Lex Luthor is right for you.

Jason Todd - YOU MUST KNOW LIFE TO KNOW DECAY. by orpheusaki

Not Rated - Jason Todd & Bruce Wayne; Dick Grayson & Jason Todd; Jason Todd & Willis Todd; Catherine Todd & Jason Todd; Catherine Todd/Willis Todd

Bruce starts, eyes glaring down at the city and unwilling to look anywhere else, especially in Jason's direction, "You always… hated the rain." Jason's breath gets caught in his throat. (For as long as Jason can remember, it's always been raining.)

Duke Thomas - and you breathe, sunshine, for you're not alone by Aelig

Teen And Up Audiences - Dick Grayson & Duke Thomas

"There’s a knocking sound against the window frame. “Hey,” the vigilante says softly, and Duke immediately takes a breath only to choke on it. “Robin,” Duke stammers out, and it comes out with a sob." OR: in which Dick and Duke meet years before, and it doesn't really change anything, except for a little bit of comfort.

Mia Mizoguchi - MAPPING out Neo-Gotham (Eh? Get it?) by theycallme_ook

General Audiences - Terry McGinnis & Mia "Maps" Mizoguchi

"Mia! You were in the clock this whole time?" cried Kyle, running to check on his baby sister. "I was in the future!" Maps responded eagerly, waving off his concern. "It was--will be?--preeeetty goooood!"

🫒

[bougiebutchbitch]

happy izzy headcanons, off the cuff:

ed's adhd ass remembers the most random shit about him that he said one time, like that his favorite color is green, he doesn't like sweets, and he used to feed a stray cat when he was a kid (despite not remembering ostensibly more important things / things that were repeated or told to him directly. RIP iykyk etc)

he called the cat Miss Lady and sometimes to get out of "playing" with "fellow" "children" and other such tedium, he would claim she was his boss and he had to go to work for her in her estate (he's like ≤8yo or something when he pulls this)

still has not gotten much better at lying than that tbh

his parents loved each other and him and his big sister very much. they were as happy as they could be in their level of poverty, and iz's youngest years were filled with unconditional love

he and his sister both got their first jobs at the same little shop, but izzy was immediately and comically fired for being crass and rude to customers lmao (also for wearing pants)

he was part of the navy for an astounding one (1) year before being discharged - equally comically - for being the singular most insubordinate little shit ever seen. regular punishments had absolutely no effect on his behavior, and though they threatened to do worse by that point they could not catch him.

his criminal record is just as long as ed's, but the bulk of his charges are morality based. he fucks so severely it is a crime. (not that hard to do really, at the time, but he's proud of it lol.)

Jewish

was taught to read english and hebrew as a kid (Jewish communities at the time had higher literacy on average than other groups & taught girls as well as boys to read, iirc)

can buy and sell in many languages, but can't really converse. is in the process of learning spanish from jim and french from frenchie (with much more unsavory instruction provided by roach, for surprise use on frenchie lmao)

not necessarily about izzy i guess lmao, but i have a scene that runs in my head of izzy telling jim something private in spanish and jim interrupting (but not fast enough) to yell that oluwande is fluent, to which olu nervously says "no, i forgot. those words. don't use 'em much, so. you know. whoosh. gone. didn't understand any of it."

he and anne fake dated way back, to make ed and mary jealous

he and jack tried this also, after it worked for anne but not for izzy, but in the process they accidentally dated for real (jack... might have had ulterior motives lmao)

takes ye olde hrt, in the form of an herbal tea recipe that he got from a midwife who clocked him at 50 paces. they are still friends.

bottom sub leaning, but still a vers switch!!!

explores his gender further, with encouragement and some minor guidance from wee john. he has a little bit of a crisis at first, wondering if he only felt like a man because he didn't make a very pretty woman, but he talks it all through in fits and starts - primarily in out of context ambushes - with john and jim, learns more about drag, etc, and eventually gets comfortable with being a man who pretends to be a woman sometimes and just happens to be very good at it due to certain biological advantages lol

later functionally becomes ed's drag mom, the way john was for him - featuring many more instances of dressing him up like he did for the party in season one

realizes after being folded into the found family that he LOVES cuddling, and physical intimacy of all kinds. like basically discovers acts of service is actually not his only love language. nothing makes him feel more content than being physically in sync with someone.

at some point pete decides he wants to stop being all talk and actually live up to all the shit he's bragged about, but he doesn't want everyone else to know and/or there to be any witnesses to him being bad at stuff at first. so he solicits secret lessons from izzy, and izzy gives them and keeps the secret without condition.

he's basically the gordon ramsay of piracy. if you're learning and you're working at it, he's patient and attentive. if you act like you don't have anything to learn or make claims you can't back up, he calls you a fucking donkey.

grows his hair out. adores having it played with.

takes his job as "unicorn" very seriously. all of his duties are pretty much assigned to him via his own perception of what the fuck being the ship's unicorn even means, but if he says something is or isn't his job everyone goes with it without question. he sometimes abuses this fact, but only with ed lmao.

has each member of the crew add their own x to his tattoo and ends up with a little constellation of slightly differently shaped stars across his cheek/temple

SHRIEKS IN JOY

oh these are PERFECT. Excuse me while i squeal over each and every one.

I KNOW THAT PAIN, ED, BABYBOY, DARLING, PRINCESS WITH A DISORDER. He is theeeee most ADHD gremlin. He will randomly describe in perfect detail a day from 10 years ago that Izzy only has the vaguest recollection of, down to the precise inflection in whatever Izzy said to make that moment stick in his mind - but he still doesn't know Izzy's birthday sldkfhgklsdfhg

oh no. OH NO. Tha'ts horrifically cute. And I love that Izzy is a gritty old pirate who can kill without a moment's hesitation - but he cannot tell a good fib to save his life lmao. It's the 'tism

:cris and holds happy baby Izzy close:

I'm WHEEZING at tiny angry scowly Izzy getting fired from a shop for being a bastard refusing to wear a dress, saying fuck this, running away to join the Navy where the wearing of dresses is not requisite, and almost immediately getting fired for STILL BEING A BASTARD. :chinhands: it's so him

I am just. Imagining. Lucius getting hold of Izzy's criminal record in S1 before they really get to know each other. And just being supremely confused that Izzy has actually walked the walk lmao

JEWISH IZZY JEWISH IZZY JEWISH IZZY :clutches that headcanon very close to my chest:

ohhhhhh gosh I LOVE the crew teaching each other casual little things.... language tutors Jim and Frenchie and co., my favourite. I wonder if Izzy teaches them a tiny bit of Hebrew, too? Or if he keeps that very close to his chest. (I love the headcanon that he and Ed are both Jewish, and it's part of what drew them together~)

SCREAMS at Izzy accidentally Revealing Things to Olu because he doesn't realise he speaks that much Spanish.... And at Jim warning him! I also imagine that like, AS SOON as Jim gives that warning, they get the fuck in front of Oluwande with a knife, juuuust in case Izzy goes for him - but Izzy just glares at Oluwande, jerks a nod, and mutters 'first time I've given a man amnesia without having to hit him in the head'. Oluwande awkward-laughs and flees, but though Izzy's a tiny bit wary of him for a few weeks, he doesn't stab him?? So, y'know, success?

also, as ever, I am OBSESSED with Jim and Izzy being casual quiet trans buddies and helping each other out now and then. :gently pushes my headcanon of Izzy helping Jim acquire Ye Olde Top Surgery towards the fandom on a silver plate:

FAKE DATING FAKE DATING AHHHHHHHHHHH

CJIZZY AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHh (I love Jack being like. 'Yeah I'll fake date you to make Ed jealous, Izzy :D Yeah, absolutely no strings attached. Yeah we're not gonna actually fuck or anything. Of course.' then pulling EVERY string available to get in Izzy's pants dsfklghkdsfgkdlsgf

YESSS TO BOTTOM SUB LEANING VERS SWITCH IZZYYYYYY he has the range, darling! I love the idea that he was Ed's service top for ages, and is legit good with a strap~ >:3c Almost as much as I love subby top Izzy who always comes too soon and goes jellylegged so his partner has to sigh and take over and fuck him into the mattress while telling him what a disappointment he is (which, ofc, only makes him wetter). ......Yes, I blame carryme for this one entirely.

TRANSMASC DRAG QUEEN IZZY TRANSMASC DRAG QUEEN IZZY - I vibe with this on a spiritual level. Also: I can imagine Izzy was REALLY rigidly 'I am a man so I have to be masculine' as a result of internalised transphobia/fear of discovery, so this whole process of realising he can do whatever the fuck he wants, actually, involves a lot of unworking of societal assumptions and confronting past traumas and fears, and Wee John only meant to share something transgressive and fun with Izzy but now Drag Hour is therapy hour too. And honestly, it's good for him and Izzy and Jim, and Izzy's expression goes this amazing mix of offended and delighted and terrified and excited whenever he realises that yes, he is allowed to present himself however he likes and he will 'still be a man'. Although I do think he might draw the line at dresses, and keep to more andro drag? Like, he tries on a pretty dress ONCE and it's a bit Too Much when he sees himself in the mirror - but that's completely okay too, and Wee John and Frenchie are more than happy to help with tailoring outfits that he actually likes!

i AM SCREAMING AT IZZY BEING ED'S DRAG MUM YES YES YES YES YES

ohhhhh.... Izzy being just an absolute cuddle magnet.... be still my heart. I like to imagine that he was too awkward to approach anyone at first, but was SUPREMELY touch starved, so he'd sneak into the cuddle pile on deck at night and then try to wake up in the morning before everyone else. But of COURSE, everyone realises and knows and thinks it's very cute and one day when he tries to make his usual escape (moving slow to try and draw out the warmth and the contact, as well as so as not to wake anyone up) Lucius sleepily grabs his wrist and grumbles, "Izzy, staaaaaay". And, well. How can Izzy say no to that?

PETE IZZY FRIENDSHIP AHHH???? I would read that fic in a heartbeat.

Vis-a-vis the Gordon Ramsey comparison: he has ABSOLUTELY called poor Stede an 'idiot sandwich'

LONG HAIR IZZYYYYYYYYY AHHHHHHHH

Izzy wearing each of the crew's little 'x' kissy marks besides Ed's.... oh, be still my heart. This one got to me. That cheek and his neck and chest are just a map of tiny stars and - OHHHHHHHHHHH you know they're all getting gently smooched

[bruciemilf]

MORE I NEED MORE OF BATGORDON WITNESS PROTECTION AU

Bruce being so eerily quiet. He moves around like he's never been there and it creeps Jim the fuck out. In the course of one week, he also made a lengthy list of Bruce's peculiar but strangely endearing quirks?

Firstly, he doesn't kill bugs. Even spiders. Jim tried to and Bruce threw a tantrum of monstrous proportions (Bruce raised his voice a little bit and felt guilty for 2 hours bc he's still shaken by how mean he was to Alfred)

Bruce doesn't waste food; If they're eating pasta he'd eat the leftover sauce with a piece of broken, fluffy bread. No crust, ever. Tomato looks cute on his pink lips.

Bruce journals everywhere; On his napkins, on his skin, right on his wrist or legs. Small thoughts, big thoughts, -- Jim guesses, at least. He never wants to show Gordon anything.

(Bruce writing like, "Jim does not like sweets. That is sad. Will darkness finally devour me, or have I gotten too bitter?")

Give me Jim who talks abt Bruce like dog owners talking abt the mutt they saved from the pound, or a grumpy husband talking about their spouse, " Well, can't complain. I knew what I was getting myself into.".

He really didn't.

But oof. The Sexual Tension.

The Batman equipment Is still in the cave, and Bruce is constantly stressing the police officers crawling around will find it. Every night he tries to sneak off, and every night he's almost successful.

Because at first? Jim couldn't care less. " Do your thing, man. Go give some kid bad dreams or whatever it is that you do."

But the longer they're around eachother, the closer their connection is. Jim doesn't consider himself a possessive or controlling man. But when Bruce tries to tip toe his way out of his, -- their apartment? He has to speak up.

Except Bruce won't just roll over belly up and pliant. No, he pushes and avoids and bumps shoulders with him, but Jim won't have it,

Grabbing Bruce by that diamond sharp jaw and more or less slamming him back into the couch, " sit the fuck down and listen to me when I'm talking, boy."

Bruce goes ruby red. We all know he's a sucker for it

[starlightshadowsworld]

Imagine if in Batman returns instead of Bane as the villian, it was James Gordon Jr.

A kid who would've spent the last 8 years with the public trying to convince him that Batman is the villain.

Because he took the fall for all of Harvey's crimes.

Lil James Jr who refutes that claim entirely. Because Batman saved him from Two face.

He's grown up, knowing the truth and hates that a criminal has to be defended like this.

It's not justice and James Jr won't stand for it. He doesn't understand why his dad continues to praise the man who tried to kill him, his sister and his mum.

So what if he made it so that Batman would have too return? Cause an idiot so horrific it would lure him out of hiding?

The people would see that Batman was truly their hero, that Harvey Dent was a murderer and the Dent act destroyed for good.

His tragic backstory is the end if The Dark Knight Rises and what he witnessed in Batman Begins.

James Jr knows that the true hero that Gotham needs, and he will bring him back.

No matter what.

And they'd all pay for their lies.

I mean James Jr canonically becomes a serial killer and what are the Nolan Batman movies for other than traumatising poor Jim Gordon.

[sebeth]

Who's Who In The DC Universe: Batman of Earth-One and the Batman of Earth-Two

Batman of Earth-Two by Dave Gibbons & Batman of Earth-One by Dick Giordano

Batman, Superman, and Wonder Woman had versions on Earth-One and Earth-Two, mainly due to being members of the Justice Society and the Justice League. Other heroes like the Flash (Jay Garrick/Barry Allen) and Green Lantern (Alan Scott/Hal Jordan) were separate individuals using the same identity on different earths while the Trinity were always Bruce, Clark, and Diana.

The easiest way to cover the Batman entries would be to start with the similarities:

Both Batmen are named Bruce Wayne and hail from Gotham City

Parents were named Thomas and Martha Wayne

Both have an uncle named Philip Wayne

Thomas and Martha Wayne were murdered by Joe Chill after leaving a movie theater. A traumatized Bruce witnessed the murders.

Bruce spent his formative years developing his mind and body to perfection.

Bruce adopted the Batman identity. A large bat crashing through a den in Wayne Manor inspired the creation of the Batman.

At first Batman had a rocky relationship with the police but later formed a partnership with Jim Gordon

Bruce took the recently orphaned Dick Grayson under his wing. Dick later became Robin the Boy Wonder.

And now, the details unique to each version:

Earth-Two:

While Thomas was shot by Joe Chill (causing his death), the shock of seeing his death caused Martha to have a fatal heart attack.

Bruce was placed under the guardianship of his Uncle Phillip who raised him to adulthood.

Bruce moved back into Wayne Manor after coming into his inheritance.

Batman carried a gun in his first few cases but soon gave it up.

He was a charter member of the Justice Society and the All-Star Squadron.

He maintained his playboy image until the late 1950s, when he married Selina Kyle (Catwoman).

He semi-retired the Batman identity once he reached middle age and became the Gotham City Police Commissioner upon Jim Gordon’s retirement.

Bruce and Selena had a daughter named Helena.

Selina died at the hands of a former criminal colleague, inspiring Helena to become the Huntress. Bruce gave up the Batman identiy entirely after Selina’s death.

A year after the debut of the Huntress, Bruce donned the Batman uniform for the final time. He died aiding the Justice Society, saving Gotham from a super-powered criminal.

Relatives unique to Earth-Two Bruce: Selina Kyle (wife), Helena Wayne (daughter), and Karl Kyle (brother-in-law).

Earth-One:

Relatives unique to Earth-One Bruce: Lord Elwood Wayne (uncle, deceased)

A young (pre-murders) Bruce Wayne admired a costume Thomas wore to a party. It would later inspire the creation of the Batman uniform.

Joe Chill was acting under the orders of Lew Moxon. Moxon was seeking revenge against Thomas Wayne as his testimony had sent Moxon to prison.

Bruce way placed under the care of his uncle Philip. Philip was a world-class traveler, so Bruce spent his formative years under the guidance of Philip’s housekeeper, Mrs. Chilton. Unknown to Bruce, Chilton was Joe Chill’s mother.

Bruce served an apprenticeship under Harvey Harris (the world’s foremost detective) while training to be Batman.

Frustrated by laws that seemed to help criminals more than their victims, Bruce left law school.

As on Earth-Two, Bruce took Dick Grayson under his wing. The difference being that Dick’s costume was inspired by the one Bruce wore while serving as an apprentice under Harvey Harris.

Bruce left his playboy image for a time and devoted himself to running Wayne Enterprises and building the Wayne Foundation into one of the world’s foremost philanthropic organizations. He later relinquished his day-to-day involvement in the organizations to devote more time to being Batman.

Bruce has recently become the guardian of Jason Todd, a young circus performer whose parents were murdered by Croc. Todd has since become the new Robin.

Batman, a founding member of the Justice League, has recently resigned due to a philosophical dispute over law and justice.

He has recently formed a new team called the Outsiders.

The next few entries are of Batman’s utility belt, the Batmobile, the Batplane, and the Batboat. Mostly drawings with some basic information.

Everybody knows Batman. Ask any non-comic book fans to name a superhero, and you have a ninety percent chance of the person responding with Batman. He’s had a bazillion comic books where he is the focus and has made millions of guest appearances in other comics. As for non-comic book media…he’s easily the most featured hero of all time. No one else comes close. Batman has starred in radio dramas, multiple movies and tv series, along with many cartoon series and animated movies. And numerous video games. Not to mention all the merchandising.

Whether you love or hate the character, if you were to make a list of the top 100 super-heroes of all time, you would have a hard time justifying not putting Batman in the #1 spot.

I love certain versions of Bruce (the bronze age, BTAS/DCAU, Justice League International, Young Justice cartoon, Wayne Family Adventures) and despise others (the majority of the 2000s).

As for the actual Who’s Who entries:

I miss the Bruce – Selina marriage. The cop-out during the King run was lame. And infuriating if you spent money on all the tie-in issues (which I did not).

I wish Helena would be born during curing continuity (I know adult Helena is running with the JSA but I want baby Helena just for the interactions with her bat-siblings).

If the “Bruce was placed under a housekeeper’s care while his guardian travelled the world” bit was canon in the post-Crisis era it would have been a great element to add to the Bruce-Tim Drake bond.

I don’t like the Dick’s costume was inspired by Bruce bit. Dick’s Robin indentiy is inspired by his parents only.

I hate Jason’s pre-Crisis origin. “He’s exactly like Dick but with red hair but we’ll dye it black” – that’s the best you could do, DC? Seriously?

[izunias-meme-hole]

THE BATMAN/BRUCE WAYNE

"I am vengeance."

After witnessing the demise of his parents as a young boy, Bruce Wayne was forever scarred by this event and dedicated a great majority of his life to finding out how he can entirely remove crime from Gotham City. He spent his teenage years studying psychology, traveled the the world as a young adult to learn martial arts, spent a great amount of time perfecting what he learned when he returned to Gotham, and had put some of his own resources into making a special suit and some weaponry. By the time he was ready, Bruce Wayne had actively disappeared from public life, and had embraced his new identity as "The Batman." As Batman, Bruce would travel the streets of Gotham, leaving criminals of many types beaten, battered, and exposed for all of the city to see, becoming an urban legend in the process. Not even some of the corrupt cops were safe. However as time would begin to pass, Bruce would begin to see the rise of a new breed of criminal in his first few months as the ever-so terrifying Batman, and would begin to see how much deeper the corruption in Gotham ran. He would never give up on his mission, but he's slowly beginning to realize that this one man crusade he's on might be tougher than he realized.

Yep. This is my re-interpretation of Batman, and from what I have written in my own mind so far, he's going to go through an arc where he starts out as "vengeance," punishing criminals, installing fear in them before leaving them for the police, and fighting this one-man war on crime. Then after realizing that he cannot truly do this alone, he allows his butler and surrogate father, Alfred, and Captain Jim Gordon to assist him in his endeavors, and as more time would begin to pass he would develop into less of a symbol of fear for all of Gotham, and more a of symbol of hope for the innocents in Gotham. As this evolution would take place, Bruce himself would begin getting somewhat better in the head overtime.

In-case you cannot tell, this is my more idealized take on the "Batman Timeline" which is based entirely on the arcs of Battinson and the Lego Batman, and some parts of the DCAU's Batman lifeline. Starting out as a young and angry man trying to literally eradicate crime as a whole by himself that fears losing people that he cares for all over again, and ending as an old man who's managed to finally get some of his own problems resolved and is a better person because of it, even if he can never truly "fix" himself.

As for the character of good 'ol Batsy, it's pretty much what you'd expect. Cold, calculating, distant, persistent, skeptical, manipulative if he wants to be, dedicated to his goal, and overall a jackass on the outside. Yet despite having a lot of negatives, Bruce still has some level of compassion and empathy, and overtime he begins to show that to those who need it. He's also not that much of a socialite, but after go back into the public occasionally AS Bruce Wayne, he tries his best to fake being a slick billionaire with not much to worry about, but he has occasional cracks of his true self slip.

And before you point it out, yes his design is inspired by the Keaton suit, however the cowl has red lenses and it covers his entire face. Also it's armored in a similar way to the Battinson suit underneath that cape. As for Bruce's design, the suit is an inverse of his nemesis's colors (We'll get to him later), and I wanted him to look active and colorful, while also looking sleep deprived and dying on the inside.

I hope I expressed my vision clear enough for MY Batman. I thought this up for funnies, and not like actual writing purposes (I already have a project), but if I were to take an attempt at writing the Bat, it would be similar to what I spoke about here.

[reality-detective]

Allow me to take you back into history a little bit, a small Rabbit 🐇 Hole 🕳️ into JFK's assassination. The untold part after the shooting. 👇

Remember... Dr. Charles Crenshaw mentioned there was absolute mayhem at the hospital.

The other thing he mentions in this You Tube clip: 👇

Jackie walked up to JFK’s body and kissed him on the Great toe. Then she walked around to his right side and put her ring on his little finger.

I’ve also read that she took his ring.

Was this just a normal reaction after someone dies? Or was this too some type of a ritual/symbolic gesture?

Could it have been a marker for her to identify which body was Tippet’s and which was JFK’s?

(Hence the mayhem or confusion as described by Crenshaw).

Jackie went to 3 colleges/ Universities (George Washington, Georgetown, Vassar)...colleges that were either associated with MK Ultra, Jesuits, or witches/covens.

I’m going to leave all options on the table.

At 1:00 pm...30 minutes after JFK was shot, Kennedy’s Press Secretary...Malcom Kilduff not only announced to the world that Kennedy was dead, but he also (correctly) showed the direction of the bullet travelled in regards to Kennedy’s head wound.

Kilduff was acting press secretary for the trip because the main White House press secretary, Pierre Salinger, was traveling to Japan with six members of the Cabinet... for a joint meeting with the Japanese Cabinet.

☝️Pocket that paragraph. This may come up if I dive into everything further “X”, but also the strange phenomena of differing time lines/time travel/ the Mandela Effect. 👇

Moving on with our timeline...

At approximately 1:10-1:15pm Dallas Police Officer JD Tippit was driving east on East 10th street. He pulled alongside a man...most believed to be Oswald.

Tippett was ordered to be on the lookout for Oswald.

The man walked over to Tippit’s car...they exchanged words.

Officer Tippit got out of the car, at which time the man (thought to be Oswald) pulled out a gun and fired 5 shots in succession.

2 bullets to the chest

1 bullet to the right temple

1 in the stomach

1 completely missed

JD Tippett was pronounced dead at the Methodist Hospital at 1:25. Note...he was pronounced dead at the Methodist Hospital.

Remember... Lee Harvey Oswald had a Doppelgänger. Some say he possibly had 4 or 5 body doubles or look-allies.

Did it appear that JD Tippett was a second patsy? 👇

Police later arrested Oswald at the Texas Theater. They accused him of killing JD Tippett.

Jim Garrison did not believe Oswald killed Tippett. The timelines put out by the Warren Commission didn’t match for one thing.

Who did kill Tippett? At this point it won’t be our focus. But I’ve read that it could have also been Roscoe White or G Gordon Liddy.

G stands for George.

A lot of “George’s” were part of the plot. 👇

Why was JD Tippett killed and seemingly a purposeful piece of this grand scheme? Could it have been because of his appearance? JD Tippet looked so much like the President that people often commented about it. Fellow policemen would often kid him about it, calling him “Mister President” and “JFK.” 👇

The bullets were removed from Tippett’s body. He was then moved from the Methodist Hospital to Parkland Hospital... Where JFK’s body was also.

While the media circus was distracted on the Casket of JFK, they completely missed the ambulance that was transporting JD Tippet’s body to AF2... The plane that usually flies the Vice President. 👇

JFK’s body was then transported to Loveland Airfield.

The story goes that the people aboard AF1 were told to go forward...so that they could witness the swearing in of LBJ.

Supposedly that was just a ruse so that Jackie would leave her husband’s body, and the cover-up plot could continue.

Once she was away from his coffin, JFK’s body was taken and placed aboard AF2...where JD Tippett’s corpse was also. 👇

Who was waiting aboard AF2 to be with the corpses?

John Melvin Liggett.

Liggett was a CIA agent. He was also a funeral director, and one of the best reconstructive surgeons and embalmers in the business at the time.

Why this guy? 🤔

There is a lot to this story that NOBODY knows, it's a twisted dive. If I can I will add another update later. It seems like every time I dive into these History Lessons I discover they lied to us with just about everything. 🤔

[brucewaynerater101]

Year One: Two

Bruce

It's just the cover

10/10. He looks like a freak. I love it.

First "appearance" in the comic so far

10/10. It's gorgeous, spooky, and hints at what's to come. I'm also so happy Bruce committed to his bit.

Batman's first appearance on the street

7/10. Leg.

It's also hilarious that he's reflecting on his costume. He's all like, "It works! They freeze and stare and give me all the time in the world." Buddy... I don't think it's because you're so scary.

Some guy trips over the ledge and Bruce dives to save him despite it leaving him open to attacks

4/10. So... I guess he didn't kill those cops in the last chapter. Negative points for the sexist comment of "he screams like a girl."

He's sitting on top of unconscious bodies

8/10. He's referring to himself as an amateur

Jim is chatting about Bruce's seventy-eight acts of assault

10/10 for the police sketches.

Flashback of a witness to Batman

7/10. I feel like he's about to bark at the gunman

Bruce is reflecting on Jim

8/10. He's just a little guy. Also, rad line. "All the right people seem to hate him."

IS THAT A GRENADE?

8/10. Not this being how I find out I've been pronouncing "grenade" wrong my entire life.

Batman crashes the dinner party

10/10 LMAO. NERD. He's such a weirdo, I love it. "You have eaten well." Pfft.

Stole this man's (Roman's) car, crashed it into the river, and left him tied up naked

20/10. This is the type of revenge/"justice" I want to see more of.

Bruce was just chilling behind the desk while Gordon was pressing Dent about Batman

9/10. I see why Dent/Bruce is a thing

Batman diving in to save someone

9/10. This artwork is gorgeous

Batman fleeing after saving someone's life

9/10. Run run run run. Also, he got shot in the leg :)

The police blow up the building

2/10. Police legit out here not caring about collateral damage. Fuckers.

Other Stuff

Link!!

[meganlpie]

You Have a What?!

Based on this request: Would you write for Bullock? Almost no one does and it makes me sad. If so, could I get a secret wife trope where someone kidnaps the reader(Bullock’s wife) and that’s how Jim finds out?

Here you are, lovely! *I do not own ANY Gotham characters.*

Warnings: Secretly Married Trope, angst(mentions of kidnapping and some violence), Harvey is soft for reader, fluff-ish??

Pairings: Harvey Bullock x fem!reader, mentions of Jim Gordon and Ed Nygma

When Harvey left home that morning, he was expecting the usual Gotham crazy, maybe even a bit more. But not this. Harvey couldn't remember the last time he'd been so afraid and so angry at the same time. "What the hell?" he muttered as he read the words on the paper in front of him. The glasses perched on his nose nearly fell off when he finished reading and shot up from his chair.

         "Who was at my desk?!" he shouted, his voice echoing through the bull pen. "Did anyone see who was at my desk?!" Several people shook their heads and Harvey's hands began to shake. "Harvey?" Jim asked. Harvey met his partner's gaze and nearly broke. This was not happening. Jim snatched the paper from Harvey's shaky hands.

         "'Secrets out, Detective Bullock. If you want her back, follow the clues. You'll find the first riddle in the drawer. Clock's ticking'," Jim read as his brows furrowed. "This is obviously Nygma, Harvey, but what's he talking about?" Harvey slammed the drawer to his desk closed and headed out, riddle in hand.

         "Harvey?!" Jim called, grabbing his jacket and rushing after Harvey. Jim barely made it to Harvey's car. "Harvey! You know I'll follow you wherever you need, but you need to tell me what the hell is going on!" Harvey paused in his movements for a moment and ran his hand over his beard. "He's got my wife, Jim," Harvey practically whispered before climbing into the driver's seat.

         After getting over his shock, Jim hurriedly jumped into the passenger's seat. "Your what? You have a what?!" Harvey was trying not to shake. He was a detective in the GCPD, dammit! He couldn't fall apart. You needed him. "My wife, Jim. I have a wife! And Nygma found out and now he's got her!" Harvey's voice rose.

         Harvey passed the riddle to Jim in hopes he could figure it out. Harvey wasn't good at riddles in the best of times and this was NOT one of those times. His mind was all over the place. He really hoped you were alright. He couldn't lose you.

         He thought about how you'd looked that morning with sleepy eyes, mussed hair, and wrinkled pajamas as you walked out of your bedroom to tell him goodbye even though you didn't have to be up for another hour or so. He thought about how your kiss had felt against his lips right before you shoved his favorite pastry into his hand as you shooed him out the door. If Nygma harmed a single hair on your head, Harvey swore he'd kill him.

         "Anything?" he asked Jim with a snap in his voice. "Looks like…the docks. The clue is leading us to the docks." Harvey cursed under his breath. Nothing good ever came from going to the docks in Gotham. He pressed harder on the gas, urging his car to go faster. "Harvey," Jim quietly complained from the passengers' seat, earning a glare from the senior detective.

         The car was barely in park at the docks when Harvey was out of it. He called your name until Jim motioned to an open shipping container. Harvey pulled his gun and prepared for the worst. To his relief, it was empty except for a computer on a desk. Harvey could just make out Nygma's face as he approached the device. "Hello, Detective Bullock. I must say, your wife is not what I expected. I suppose I'll never understand how someone so…beautiful and intelligent could fall for an ignoramus like you."

         "Let her go, Nygma!" Harvey demanded, earning a sadistic laugh from the criminal. "Now, now, Detective. You know that isn't how this works. You have to follow the riddles. Oh, and you may want to hurry. I'm not sure how much longer your wife's wit will keep her safe."

         "Nygma, I swear to g-"

         "You're boring me, Detective. Follow the next riddle or I'll-" Nygma was cut off by a punch to the jaw. Harvey felt his heart rise to his throat when he heard your voice. "You probably should have made sure I was properly restrained. Idiot," you snapped before delivering a swift kick to Nygma followed by another punch. Caught off guard, Nygma fell to the floor, groaning.

         A sigh of relief escaped Harvey's lips when your face appeared on the screen. "Hi, Harvey." He smiled. "You okay, baby?" At your nod, Harvey relaxed more. "I'm fine. Can you come home now?" Harvey's brows furrowed as Jim chuckled a little.

         "You mean to tell me Nygma held my wife hostage in my own damn house?!" You nodded again. "Yep. I guess he wanted you chasing your tail for a while by sending you in a circle. So, if you could send some of your people to come get him while you make your way home, that'd be great. I've got your favorite danish."

         "Have I told you that I love you, woman?" You let out a laugh. "Only a billion times, but I never get tired of hearing it. Oh, and thanks for teaching me how to throw a punch. I might have broken my hand otherwise. The man's jaw could cut diamonds." Harvey's boisterous laughter echoed through the shipping container as Jim called for a couple officers to pick up Nygma.

         "I'll be home soon, baby. Keep yourself safe until then," Harvey told you before continuing, "And if you could give him another kick for me, I'd appreciate it." You gave a roll of your eyes, but didn't argue. Instead, you blew him a kiss and turned off the camera. Harvey shook his head fondly and followed after Jim.

         "That wife of yours," Jim started, "Is something else." Harvey nodded with a grin. "Yeah she is. I'm one lucky sonovabitch." Harvey had to fight to keep the smile off his face the rest of the drive back to his apartment. He got there just in time to see two officers escorting Nygma out. The gangly man had blood pouring from his nose from where you'd punched him the second time. Harvey laughed a bit, but was quickly cut off as you threw yourself into his arms. "I think it's time to move," you said, your voice muffled by his jacket. "Whatever you say, baby."

(a/n: I hope you like it! Harvey is probably one of my favorite characters in the show!)

Forever Tags: @fizzyxcustard​ @brewsthespirit-blog​ @sirkekselord​ @aikibriarrose​ @lady-of-lies​ @dark-angel-is-back​ @motleymoose​ @esoltis280​ @stories-by-shanna-p​ @supernatural4life2022​

Gotham Tags are OPEN!

[doomandgloomfromthetomb]

Sonic Youth (and Friends) - Bowery Ballroom, New York City, April 1, 1999

Sonic Youth started the 1990s attempting to break into the rock and roll mainstream. The band ended the decade trying to get as far away from it as possible. To wit, this April Fool's gig in NYC — a live preview of the Goodbye 20th Century collection on SYR that would be released later that year. Aside from Lee Ranaldo's solo (and quite lovely) rendition of "Wish Fulfillment," the two-plus-hour set doesn't include any Sonic Youth songs; instead, it's made up of abstract improvisational quests and daring interpretations of pieces by such minimalist composers as John Cage, Yoko Ono, Pauline Oliveros and more.

It's a friends and family affair, with collaborators like Leah Singer, Wharton Tiers, William Winant, Ikue Mori, Takehisa Kosugi and more showing up to lend a hand. Oh and then there's Jim O'Rourke, who's making his debut #SonicSummer appearance — he'll be onboard for the next few years. Hello, Jim!

This ain't easy listening, of course, but it's perhaps more playful than pretentious — after all, the Yoko piece is primarily just Kim Gordon shrieking. And there's plenty of raw beauty, too: the simple, surging swell of James Tenney's "Having Never Written A Note For Percussion" is an impressive feat of collective energy, the players moving as one through the spaceways. Most of all, SY and their pals seem to be enjoying getting into these strange and beguiling compositions, still searching for unknown vibrations.

Bandcamp | Merch | Concert Chronology

[emotionalcadaver]

Part 16: Why Do We Fall

Fandom: The Dark Knight Trilogy

Pairing: Jonathan Crane x OC

Summary: Batman's return to Gotham forces Jonathan and Vanessa to reassess their current living situation.

Word Count: 1,698

Notes: Takes place during The Dark Knight Rises. Warnings for depictions of violence.

Previous Part • Series • Next Part

“No lawyer? No witnesses? What sort of due process is this?” Jim Gordon asked them. The court was uncharacteristically quiet, save for his voice. Vanessa shifted, ever so slightly, in Jonathan’s lap, head cocking as she looked down on him and his group of followers. 

“Your guilt has been determined. This is merely a sentencing hearing,” Jonathan said. “Now, what will it be? Death…or exile?”

“Crane, if you think we’re going out onto that ice willingly…you have another thing coming.”

Jonathan nodded, and shrugged. “Death, then.”

“Looks that way!”

Their commissioner had balls, she’d give him that.

“Very well. Death…” Jonathan brought his gavel down with a decisive clang. And then, in the bitchiest voice she had ever heard her husband use, he added, “by exile.”

The crowd erupted into cheers. Vanessa laughed, pressing her smile into Jonathan’s neck as she watched Gordon and his people be led away by the mercenaries.

All except for one. At the corner of the group, she spotted Miranda Tate, Wayne Enterprises’ new CEO, being led by the arm by Barsad towards Bane, who was standing on the edge of the crowd. He rested a hand on her shoulder, almost affectionately, and began to guide her away.

Her head tilted curiously. Bane had said that the courtroom was their turf. They got to make the rules. Decide what happened to each and every person brought before them. And yet here he was, trying to challenge their authority.

They adjourned for the day, waiting until the spectators had been ushered out by their goons before descending from the safety of their throne to head into the back room they’d fashioned as their bedroom. 

“Bane took Miranda Tate with him, even though she was captured with Gordon’s people,” she observed. 

“I noticed that too,” Jonathan was fumbling with the microwave they had in the corner, reheating a few servings of soup for them for dinner. “Maybe he took a shine to her.”

“Their contact did seem rather affectionate.”

He passed her a bowl of soup and a spoon, grabbing his own before joining her. 

“It’s probably for the best not to antagonize Bane.”

She winced at the mere thought of it. The man looked like he could snap both of them in half like a toothpick with just one hand. “Yeah, you’re probably right.”

“It’ll be good to finally be rid of Gordon.”

“I’m surprised it took them so long to find him,” she said around a mouthful of soup. “I know it’s a big city, but Bane’s men seem…experienced in what they do.”

“Gordon’s got a lot of allies.”

“Mm. Well, it’s done now,” she shifted to rest her head on Jonathan’s shoulder, eyes darting lazily towards the window. She stiffened. “Oh, shit.”

“What?” he asked, suddenly on high alert. She didn’t answer him, instead setting her bowl down and scrambling to her feet, staggering towards the window. 

Oh, no. Oh, come on. They were having so much fun. 

Behind her, she heard Jonathan getting to his feet, following to stand behind her and stare out the window.

To where a burning bat symbol was emblazoned on the tower of one of the bridges.

∗ ∗ ∗ 

“You have the notebooks?”

Jonathan patted a pocket in his backpack. “All here. You got the remaining seeds for the flowers?”

“Yes,” she said, double checking inside the innermost pocket of her own pack that the bag of precious seeds was still there.

Jonathan glanced around the bedroom. “I already double checked the lab.”

She nodded. They’d taken care of all the remaining test subjects too. He looked back at her.

“Is there anything we’re missing?”

“Nothing that I’ve noticed,” she did her own quick sweep of the bedroom, but spotted nothing that couldn’t be easily replaced. 

“Okay,” Jonathan hoisted his backpack up over his shoulder, his mask clutched in his hand. He held the other out to her. “Let’s go.”

Pulling her pack on to rest comfortably between her shoulder blades, she pulled up her half face respirator, fitting it snugly over her nose and mouth. Just in case. Grabbing tightly onto Jonathan’s hand, she let him tug her along down the hall, towards the main room and the exit of the courthouse. 

They didn’t have an entirely concrete plan as to where they would go yet. Right now they just needed to get away. Wait for the dust to settle, then maybe root out a safehouse they could use. 

All they really had to do was avoid the Bat, and they should be fine. Hopefully it wouldn’t be too hard; he was likely to have his hands very full with Bane.

There had been a slew of activity since the Bat’s symbol had appeared. Bane’s men were all being called away from the courthouse to City Hall, where a batch of the city’s cops who the Bat–presumably–had freed were marching. 

One thing was for sure, they weren’t sticking around to get shot or pummeled by either side, thank you very much. Jonathan pulled his mask on as they rushed towards the exit. Maybe once they were outside they could find a car or something to steal. 

“Going somewhere?”

Bane was leaning against the wall that he so often was hovering by while he watched them take their court cases.

Vanessa froze, taking a step back. “We’re not sticking around to be smacked around by the Bat once he shows up.”

“That won’t be an issue.”

“You don’t know him,” Jonathan huffed. 

“Your presence is still required.”

“Court’s been canceled for the day, I’m afraid.”

A growling sound came from Bane’s modulator. “Your toxin will be of the utmost value in the fight against the police.”

Jonathan hesitated, for the briefest of moments. “No. No, I don’t think that it will.”

Bane took a threatening step forward. They took one back. Around them, mercenaries had filed silently into the hall. Jonathan squeezed her hand.

“It’s been a pleasure doing business with you,” he said to Bane. “But we have to look out for ourselves, first. Surely you understand,” the detonator in his hand clicked, and then the toxin bombs around them exploded. Almost instantaneously, a thick wave of gas rose to fill the entire courtroom. So thick it was difficult to see through. 

By the time that the mercenaries started screaming, they had dodged Bane as he lunged for them and raced out the door, down the street and around the corner. 

∗ ∗ ∗ 

They managed to dodge the worst of the fighting, and scramble their way up a building using a fire escape, settling on a rooftop far enough from the battle that they didn’t need to worry about getting struck with stray bullets or explosions. Sitting down with their backs to the wall, looking out over the city, they resigned themselves to just wait until it all died down.

It was considerably safer up there on the rooftops than it was down on the streets, at least. 

Jonathan had his arm around her, head leaned against hers, fingers tracing nonsensical patterns into her shoulder. She was just barely beginning to doze, thinking about how it actually wasn’t all too bad up there and maybe she could take a quick nap and by the time she woke up it would all be over, when another thought occurred to her.

“Jonathan?”

“Mhm?”

“You don’t think that bomb Bane was threatening the city with will go off, do you?”

“Hm…” he frowned. “It’s possible. If Bane gets pissed enough…he seems like the kind of guy who would be happy to take us all down with him if given the opportunity.”

She frowned, chewing on her bottom lip worriedly. Jonathan gave her a squeeze.

“If it does go off, we probably will be incinerated before we even know what happened.”

“Oh, that makes me feel better,” she muttered dryly. Jonathan chuckled, kissing her forehead.

“Bats won’t let that happen.”

“Huh. Something he’s actually good for,” she curled in closer to him. “I love you,” she wanted to make sure she told him that, just in case this actually was it.

Jonathan shrugged. “You’re okay, I guess.”

She made an indignant sound and he laughed as she lightly shoved him, pulling her into his arms until she was half spread out in his lap. He kissed her.

“I love you too.”

Giggling, she closed her eyes.

BOOM!

Her face creased at the sound, scrunching closer to Jonathan.

“Oh my god,” he said, sounding very exasperated.

“What?” she opened her eyes, following his gaze across the city to where the Bat’s…aircraft? Plane? Whatever it was, it was flying through the city at a furious speed, the spherical bomb that Bane had been threatening the city with attached to a cable and being dragged behind it. 

“Is he…is he fucking towing a neutron bomb?” it wasn’t as question so much as just the most absurd statement she’d ever had to utter in her entire life. They both winced when the bomb, dangling precariously, almost smacked into the side of a building on a sharp turn, before the aircraft was swooping out over the bay, barreling towards the open water. Soon it was but barely a speck of black against the horizon. 

There was a sudden, distant boom, and then a blinding flash of light. She sucked in a harsh breath at the fireball in the distance, cringing back on instinct. Jonathan held her tighter. 

“It’s okay,” he said. “It’s far enough away from us.”

“Yeah,” she whispered, just staring at the pillar of fire rising in the sky. “Do you think he’s dead?”

“The Bat? Maybe,” he huffed. “But I’ve learned not to get my hopes up when it comes to that.”

She snorted. It was true. If anyone could survive an explosion like that, it was Batman. He was like a goddamn cockroach. 

Jonathan hummed, kissing her forehead. “You know what I want to do?”

“Go knab some test subjects off the street while everything is still in chaos and no one will notice?”

“Actually, I was thinking of getting pizza, but I like your idea better.”

Laughing, she leaned further back against him, and closed her eyes.

Previous Part • Series • Next Part

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[ao3feed-brucewayne]

Everybody's Playing the Game

by CrouchingTiger28 Descriptions of the bat demon were mostly consistent, or as consistent as witness reports usually were. The sketch artist had given Jim a flat look when he’d asked her to draw the demon, but he’d presented her with a compiled list of descriptions, and she’d produced a reasonable drawing from that list. Having the artist’s rendition on paper only made Jim doubt himself more. There was a reason they called it the bat demon. — — — Or: Jim’s Gordon’s perspective of the Bat and his little batlings in the Borrower AU. Words: 2291, Chapters: 1/4, Language: English Series: Part 2 of And We'll Fight Like Twenty Armies (Borrower+Mechsuit AU) Fandoms: Batman - All Media Types Rating: Teen And Up Audiences Warnings: Major Character Death, No Archive Warnings Apply Categories: Gen Characters: Jim Gordon (DCU), Renee Montoya, Harvey Bullock, Bruce Wayne, Batman Ensemble Relationships: Jim Gordon & Bruce Wayne Additional Tags: POV Outsider, kind of, Alternate Universe - Borrowers Fusion, Mecha, Demons, Occult, Misunderstandings, Temporary Character Death, Canon Temporary Character Death, Child Soldiers, again only kind of, Lollipops, Batman is anti-smoking, But only when it's funny, Dubious Humanity, Restraints, Jim Gordon is the Bat Whisperer, Long-Suffering Jim Gordon, Jim Gordon Knows, hurt batman, Broken Mechs via https://ift.tt/NYPCifO

[havendance]

Okay, the full write-up for the Helena Bertinelli - Bruce Wayne Role Swap AU:

The Bertrands are an old Gotham family, old enough that they can trace their roots back to the city's founding. Of course, they usually don't because if you go back that far, you find that they used to be the Bertinellis are a branch of the Gotham mob that bought their way to legitimacy. There are still Bertinellis out there in Gotham, still running the old family business.

When Helena Bertrand is eight, her parents are killed after a night at the theater in a mugging gone wrong.

All of Gotham's most prominent families are intermarried to an extreme. Helena spends the next nine years being shuffled around from distant relative to distant relative, all of whom are try to set her up with their sons so as to get their hands on her sizable inheritance.

Gotham's elite are rotten to the core, a fact that Helena learns intimately as she grows up. She immortalizes her parents in her head as the only good people among them. (They weren't. The Bertrands were just as crooked as the rest, she was just too young to see it.

It'd be easiest if Helena could just write the whole city off, but she can't. The problem is that she loves Gotham. She loves it with the simple irrational love of a child who can't help but keep loving even after the city stabbed her in the heart.

At 17, she leaves Gotham. She runs away with as much money as she could manage to scrape together and spends the next four years living by her wits, learning from whoever's willing to teach her, preparing herself mind and body for a crusade to clean up Gotham.

While with the League of Assassins, she meets Talia. The two have a deep friendship that evolves into something deeper, though neither of them, if pressed, can articulate exactly what it is between them.

At 21, she returns to Gotham, finally old enough to touch her inheritance. She moves into Bertrand manor which has remained untouched for the past 13 years.

Helena lives alone. She keeps to a few main rooms of the manor, doesn't hire any staff, turns the cave below into her crime fighting lair, and begins her crusade, taking on the mantle of the Bat.

For two years, the Bertrand heir is a recluse. She sleeps and trains during the day. At night, she goes out as the Bat, tearing through the streets of Gotham. The only people she regularly talks with are her tentative ally, Jim Gordon, and a back-alley doctor she pays not to ask too many questions.

She just has major Battison vibes during this era of her life.

The Bat is styled intentionally androgynous. She is a living shadow, a creature of the night covered head to toe in black fabric and body armor. It's not like she went out the first night, planning for it, but in the dark, it's hard for her foes to tell that she's a woman. Rumors fly fast and she decides to encourage them. Fear and mystery are both weapons she can use.

(Not to mention, it provides another layer of security for her secret identity)

And like, I think that Helena is also very aware of the way that she was perceived and underestimated as a girl growing up. Of the ways that women can be hurt. She spent four years traveling the world on her own. I'm not comfortable saying whether or not anything happened to her, but she's definitely aware of it.

Just, the dichotomy between the mask of the Huntress and the scared little girl she feels like underneath is something I find really compelling about Helena as a character. The inhuman androgyny of the Bat is a way to play with that from a different angle.

The status quo changes one summer night when Helena goes to the circus on a whim and watches two people fall to their deaths.

The Bat meets a young boy sneaking out on the rooftops at night, searching for the man who killed his parents.

By the end of the week, Helena Bertrand has emerged from her seclusion to take in the orphaned son of the flying Graysons. At night, a brightly colored shadow begins to appear, alongside the dark form of the Bat.

Taking in Dick Grayson changes a lot. Helena Bertrand begins to partake in society again. She emerges as a ditz, a silly and naive pretty face. Someone who's a sucker for a sob story. She’s lovely little Lena, every bit as beautiful as her namesake, Helen of Troy.

She doesn't have the same playboy reputation as Bruce did. Both because of the differences in how society perceives women and also because I'm feeling the ace vibes for her in this AU.

Meanwhile, Bertrand Manor begins to transform from a house still haunted by a years old tragedy into a home. The majority remains closed up, (it's far too much space for a single women and her young ward) but Helena opens up more of the rooms and hires some staff to come by a few times a week to cook and clean. The windows are open more often and with Dick's laughter echoing down the hallways, the place begins to feel alive again.

I don't want to be like, Helena's more emotionally competent than Bruce because she's a woman, but uh, she's a more emotionally intelligent parent than Bruce.

Look, it's not hard to be less emotionally constipated than Bruce Wayne. Helena in this AU, may not be a teacher, but she also wasn't raised by an extremely repressed, British butler. She's not a perfect parent by any means, but she can actually tell her kids she loves them, like, with actual words.

Also I just want some of those softer vibes for this AU.

Anyway, because of this, she doesn't fire Dick from Robin. He makes the decision that he's outgrown the mantle on his own.

(Also, sidenote, but I think she starts taking a  couple of college classes when Dick goes off to college in this AU, out of solidarity. She's always been a little interested in it, even if she never ended up attending what with running away from home to go on her world-wide Bat training tour.)

And then she finds a kid stealing the Batmobile's tires and Dick, how do you feel about siblings? No, stop laughing! I don't have empty nest syndrome, shut up!

So Helena adopts Jason Todd, and Dick passes on the Robin mantle and everything's swell! They're happy and lets just leave them like that for now!

Let's flash back a little. Back when Dick was still Robin and coming back from his first semester of college to announce that actually higher education wasn't for him and he was dropping out, and also thinking about a new mantle, one Bruce Wayne was also coming back from his first semester for winter break.

Thomas Wayne is a mob doctor, a good one too. Good enough that he does work for all the families of Gotham and they respect his idealistic position of neutrality.

In the streets of Gotham though, tensions are rising. War breaks out between the five families and on a cold December day, the fighting boils over into Wayne's practice. Bruce is the only survivor. Both of his parents and his younger brother Allen (10 and with the sort of attitude you knew meant he was going to rule the world one day) die.

Bruce goes into hiding, fearing that someone will come back to finish the job. He swears vengeance on the men who killed his family, on all the mobs of Gotham.

To this end, he tracks down an old family friend: ex-spy, part time butler, actor, and mercenary: Alfred Pennyworth. Alfred agrees to take Bruce under his tutelage.

Bruce spends the next few months in a training montage and emerges no longer the weak young man who watched his family die, but wearing a new mask: that of the *Huntsman*!

He proceeds to track down and kill the people behind his family's deaths. He continues to act as a vigilante afterwards until, hmmm, let's say a close call with death either for him or Alfred leads him to decide to leave Gotham behind and go with Alfred to England. He attempts to hang up the cave and live a normal life.

Unfortunately, we have to go back to Helena and Jason. All good things must come to an end. @alternis wondered in the tags of my previous post about how Death in a Family would change and while I definitely feel like there would be differences, I have also not read Death in the Family, so I'm not going to comment on that at this time. Someone who has read the arc feel free to add on.

Jason still dies in the end though because his fate was predetermined by a phone poll. It destroys Helena.

After the initial rush of rage, after Superman has to stop her from killing the Joker and causing a diplomatic incident or whatever happens in DitF, Helena sinks into depression and despair.

She barely moves, only eats because the staff are still coming by to feed her. Occasionally she puts on the Bat and goes out into Gotham, fighting the same battles by rote. She's acting on autopilot without regard to whether she lives or dies.

Dick returns from space and he tries to reach out to her, to find solace in their mutual grief, but Helena isn't letting anyone in and Dick just lost a brother. He can't do everything on his own. He goes back to the Titans -- his support network.

There, in the aftermath of Jason's death, is the closest Helena ever comes to retiring the Bat. What is the point of going out every night? Of fighting this endless crusade if she couldn't save the person who mattered the most?

Enter Tim Drake! It's time for a Lonely Place of Dying.

Dick shows up like, 'I encountered a wild Tim at the circus and he's your problem now.' Tim's like 'the Bat needs a Robin', and Helena's like 'there is no more Robin, not anymore.'

Something, something, Tim pushes Helena to remember/rediscover the drive behind the mission and ends up as Robin.

Tim isn't Helena's son. He has parents and she could never be a mother. Not again, not after Jason. They're partners and they build a partnership that works.

(Side Note: Thinking about the difference in how Jack Drake interacts with Helena vs how he interacts with Bruce. He doesn't feel threatened by her in the same way because of sexism. He also doesn't respect her, probably spends some time flirting with her. Helena finds him annoying and dislikes him immensely but puts up with him for Tim's sake.)

Terrible comics arc where Helena starts to develop feelings for Jack and feels guilty because he's married that everyone just chooses to ignore

But back to Bruce! After getting through about six years worth of school in half that time, he has given up on living a new life away from Gotham. He returns to the city and gets a job as a high school teacher.

What does he teach? Idk, I'm thinking either science or history.

Bruce is that one teacher who's the toughest teacher in the school and you love him or hate him. He is a good teacher, but he also has incredibly high standards.

Cry of the Huntress (Huntsman) still happens! Bruce Wayne is minding his own business when Robin shows up and is like, 'Hi Bruce Wayne! Yes I found out your secret identity. Yest it was easy. You have a very distinctive origin story or whatever. We should team up now!' And Bruce just has to deal with it now.

Love triangle where Dick and Bruce are rivals for Barbara’s affections

And I think that's where I'm going to leave off this AU for now. (This already almost 2k, so...) (Surprisingly enough I don't feel compelled to dig into No Man's Land in this AU) (yet...)

[bruciemilf]

So, Gordon basically going from :

"Yep, the kid can come out whenever he wants" to a "Who's that home-wrecking keeping you away from me?"

After the whole time he and Bruce were living together.

He becomes suspicious when the orange marmalade starts to run out (Bruce always makes a sandwich for Selina, so he can catch up on all his cats' names) too quickly, when there's mascara on Bruce's shirts (Bruce is learning to do his eyelashes with a new kind of mascara) and he smells different (He got distracted on patrol and fell into a perfume window).

He doesn't know how to complain to him, or if he should complain to him after the (obvious accidental)kissing incident they shared.

But it's the same thing, you know?

That home-wrecker may can stole his marmalade, but not his emo meow meow!!

Not on his watch!

(While all this is going on in Gordon's head, Selina just laughs eating her marmalade sandwich, while Bruce tries not to stammer about how Jim looks manly in that police T-shirt and drinking coffee from a movie promo cup. God, that orange marmalade is so good, now she's going to ask Bruce to make her an extra sandwich.)

GODDD THIS IS FEEDING ME. SO GODDAM WELL. here's the thing; I'm pathetically weak for Bruce coming home, -- to the apartment, -- And he expected Gordon to do what he always does; Stay at the office so he won't have to stay with him.

But no. There's a whole man In his face, almost burning Bruce with chocholate liquor eyes set aflame with anger, " where the fuck were you?"

" I -- I was, -- that's none of your business," He's so braven, so ballsy, held together by a quivering spine as the other man looks down at him.

Bruce's eyes landing on elegant, bow shaped lips, romantic and kissable. He composes himself quickly. Any later and he'd kiss him,

" Boy, I know you like actin' stupid, but sometimes I feel like you ain't acting. You understand how this whole witness protection thing work, or I gotta draw it? You don't leave my sight. Point blank period."

" You didn't care until now,"

" If you knew what I cared for, you wouldn't just abandon me in the middle of the night, you, --" Jim won't lose his temper; it was the homicide to his first marriage, and he doesn't need it. Not with Bruce. " Just. Don't go again."

"...You can't bully me into agreeing with you."

" If that's how I came across, I'm sorry. Look, let's just talk about this later. You're fucking freezing. Where were you?"

Fighting Killer Croc in the sewers so you don't have to. " With...A friend."

"...Sure."

And here's the thing; Bruce absolutely gets jealous and possessive too! Have we not seen this little bitch throw a fit bc he thought Selina was Falcone's date?

Let's imagine for a moment that Jim's ex wife drops Barb off at Jim's because it's his week. He's awkward around new people, but there's a layer of hostility to it.

Something made of nasty things whenever Jim and her smile at eachother or share an inside joke, or grab eachother things, or talk with a mere smirk or brow tug.

Bruce being such a brat. Jim wants to introduce her to him while he colors with Barb, painting a pretty mermaid for her, or cropping small stickers to put on her wheelchair, and Bruce totally ignores her. "Mhm."

" You, uh... You alright?"

" I'm busy."

"...Alright," Bruce swallows down on a lump of tension watering his mouth. Maybe she knows Jim, but so does Bruce, and he knows when the man is pissed.

And if he shivers when Jim blows smoke in his face and slaps him gently for how he acted when Barb is sleeping, protected by the privacy of a bedroom they rarely share,...That's for him to know