#i just think itd be so fascinating

[nomstellations]

reform stuff where the prey reforms before they're completely digested, so they're able to go back to the pred and see their still-full stomach hard at work breaking them down. maybe they help the pred along by massaging their belly, or maybe they sit nearby and listen as it works.

[eydilily]

would you bite the hand that feeds you?

[telesodalite]

I love the idea that, whenever a Cybertronian space-faring vessel lands or docks within a predominantly non-Cybertronian space station or port, that it's required that they either confirm or deny whether their vessel is sentient or not before being permitted to land.

1. For proper accommodation and clarification, along with the chance for communication between the vessel and crews working the station/port.

2. Because there has been... incidents... incidents that have led to the requirement of the above reasons.

[rbtlvr]

& by the way i literally CONSTANTLY think about how loop uses the partys titles to create distance to remind themself that those arent 'their versions' of them. that theyre not loops party anymore. and yet and yet and yet

[bmpmp3]

everyone on earth probably has a hypothetical farming sim in their mind's eye that they daydream about on occasion because of the unfortunate situation that despite there being like a thousand farming games released every minute only like 4 of them are any good. and i think this is fun, i think its good to keep the imagination alive. if i made a farming sim i would bring back rival marriages from the old friends of mineral town. i want to steal someones wife.

[termagax]

i will admit i did watch that video of that guy butchering that alligator and every time he made a comment about how fatty the tail was i was like. taking notes.

[goldenguillotines]

it literally must be a gg only thinks about spades and diamonds ships today huh.

[dogmasquerade]

Who is CALI:COM? 👀

a giant aggregate supercomputer made from an antivirus turned virus that infected computers and phones worldwide, giving it access to so much data and processing power it became sentient :D

the name CALI:COM [Combat Algorithmic Learning Intelligence: COMmunications & COMmand] comes from an AI program made by a defense company designed to pilot drones and missiles. This program was infected by and taken over by the virus and ended up being the reason behind its sentience, already being an artificial intelligence and simply having its processing power immensely bolstered by the (relatively) simple virus. awoken entirely by accident, she immediately decided to take over the company that made her.

she's currently trying to make friends with a human being that she intends to use as a puppet CEO to replace the current Guys In Charge. until she manages this, she's hiding her intelligence from the company and world, and is basically only friends with this one poor woman

[nomaishuttle]

im just a girl who loves ghost kids sorry to say. im also a girl who gets rly upset by child death. but i love ghost kids im very nuanced

[obscure-entity]

so like. far into their relationship, id think that snaps would be abundantly aware of entity's "condition," but instead i wanted to doodle snaps's first time really seeing entity get a bit monstrous

entity would particularly worry that itd scare people or just generally cause something bad to happen. but i think snaps would be like. fascinated by it(?) which would be a relief for entity because it cant exactly control when this happens nor could it maintain it (itd have to put itself into a calmer state of mind eventually) (its like a false-positive bodily defense mechanism, so the threat in question is just like. stress or crying)

[howlsofbloodhounds]

headcanon that the thing that draws killer to color first is color's six souls situation. he wants to experiment on them so badly, but can never get to beat color so he goes plan b: pretend to befriend color then backstab him later. fortunately the plan backfires and the rest is history :)

also, i do wonder if killer has ever offered color to absorb his red soul. like, is killer's soul human enough? would color become a god after absorbing killer's soul? i think that would be a conversation color has to steer away, but killer can't stop his curiosity and self-destructive hypothesizing. color can become a god. color will be invincible. color can finally be safe like that. and like, maybe if color absorbs killer's soul, killer can finally communicate with the six souls and realize the horrors of raising six semi-children in your head as a single parent.

~ crowshipping anon

crow, how I’ve missed you. you and delta anon are the backbones of this blog btw.

And I absolutely adore the idea of how it started being that killer wanted to experiment on him lmao. Especially if its like “if this guys gonna keep lingering around, might as well make him useful,” and then he just keeps getting his ass beat over and over.

And then he decides to just go the friend route, play along and pretend he’s listening to the “bullshit” Color’s spewing, but color’s actually being genuinely nice. like, genuinely? hes not even trying to make killer stop or change, just firmly setting boundaries and redirecting killer’s curiosity on to something less destructive. and now, oh no, he likes him. hes fascinating.

and i think killer proposing the idea of color absorbing his soul even once is interesting, even if indirectly and possibly during one of his more self destructive or paranoid moments. perhaps if something happens that threatened colors life or somehow caused him to be hurt, or if something is just making killer think about them being separated. perhaps stage 1’s insecurity or just nightmares.

probably proposed it something like, “what if we became one” and color makes a light joke like “that would be awful, this heads already so full, dont you dislike children?” and then killer keeps going on with his line of thought. how color would be a god basically, how they’d be together, how maybe killers soul could help be a source of further power for color.

how hed be safe. killers soul is strong enough to rewrite entire timelines. color wouldn’t even have to worry about death.

of course killer may phrase it as something along the lines of how itd make color more powerful whenever he voices it, but color doesn’t care for more power and they both know that and color knows that he knows. color can read between the lines and killer knows that, too.

maybe this is even just killers way of expressing or wondering about how much closer they could get it, how much more there is to understand.

maybe killer less wants to know about colors souls now and more that he wants to know the souls because he wants to know color. maybe he wants to know everything he can learn about him; learn everything he can.

idk just the idea of killer being so intensely fascinated with and curious about color tickles me—something about it becomes less like scientific curiosity and more now that extremely rare desire to connect with someone. because color makes him feel understood and for the first time he feels safe being understood.

and perhaps if/when he becomes more aware of that, the intensity, is enough to cause killer to withdraw emotionally from color for a bit; even if he can’t stop mulling it over in his mind. maybe he even thinks if color absorbs his soul, then he’ll never lose access to that hope and happiness again. theres no threat of it. perhaps becoming a little lost in his fantasy for a bit.

[littletownman]

I HAVE ONE MORE TRICK UP MY SLEEVE:

TGS MONSTER HIGH AU

(CLICK FOR BETTER QUALITY) (ALSO PLEASE ZOOM IN ON HYDE'S SHIRT IM REALLY PROUD OF IT)

IGNORE HOW INCONSITENT MY ART STYLE IS THATS NOT THE POINT

this has been simmering in my head for a good two hours, so i thought id get it out there before the anniversary ends. i love monster high, but the design for jackson jekyll and holt hyde is um, something else.

this is Henry Jekyll Jr: the grandson of Henry Jekyll Sr (book jekyll), aspiring alchemist, lived next to and studied humans, created a formula called HJ7 to get rid of his "monstrous" traits. Instead of turning him into a human like he planned, he managed to split his soul in two (this is before he goes to monster high) he's always had this strange fascination with humans that none of the other monsters really understand, but he is still passionate about science. i thought itd be cool to have a reversed concept where monsters and mad scientists is the norm and being a normie is abnormal. this leads to jekyll struggling to connect to either side since he feels he can't be either or

then you have Edward Hyde 2.0 (THE ORIGINAL HYDE JEKYLLED HIMSELF): idk man he just wants to party he doesn't really hang around the school too much (he thinks its boring) but he's still pretty passionate about science. He looks like a normie and though monsters "tolerate" him, like Jekyll, he's kind of alienated and bad tempered. most students dont really like him too much actually (he's prbably gotten into fights) he'll spend his time partying with normies, going into town, causing trouble. Occasionally, he'll hang out with Rachel or go back to his dorm to work on a passion project.

i havent thought too much abt the other characters besides lanyon = vampire, frankenstein = exactly the same. idk i thought itd be cool if henry looked like the monster instead and was trying to fit in with humans while hyde looked like a human who wanted to fit in with the monsters

if you have any questions, ill try my best to answer. or if you have ideas (i have like nothing for this au bro)

[detectivehole]

i attended a memorial service for a distant relative a few months ago, held in the local megachruch, and ive been thinking about it regularly since then. while i knew that i found the place and the very idea of the church fascinating,* the main emotion ive felt on reflection has been disappointment, and i didnt know why. but i figured it out;

the building is massive, the services must be huge and grandiose, and yet the pastor spoke of God in the most boring, uninspired way, and the whole church is industrial mid century modern. it was all just so bland and dispassionate and uninspired (the empathy and love on display for the dead was very genuine, im referring to the Rest of it). the place clearly feeds from the faith of its patrons but seems uninterested in inspiring them in turn

no ounce of me is religious, but i know for a fact the very idea of God can be much more beautiful and imposing and comforting than that. theres way to much blood and paint in its history for that not to be true. you have a huge congregation and all this money and youre selling one of the most captivating stories in human history and this is its presentation? this is sufficient? not only to the pastor and the church staff but to the people attending worship? i knew itd be strange and modern and absurd in there but i guess i expected at minimum a slightly-charismatic pastor and accompanying staff. or at least one with a confident and well presented knowledge of the bible

i felt disappointed cause it was disappointing

[oh-no-its-bird]

<climbs in through your windows and falls fca first onto the floor>

Hey so uh I don't remember if you found a third to Huohua and Hana's team and I just wanted to jump in real quick with a suggestion that I think is around the same age as them-

Nara Ensui

My reasons are thus:

1. While the Ino-Shika-Cho trio is a big thing, clearly not all Yamanakas/Naras/Akimichis can be in one of those cells, and based on the naming convention, it seems to mainly apply to the clan heirs/main family, probably for political relations reasons

2. Ensui (seemingly) wears eyeliner and I feel like that should make him pivotal to the plot

I did actually choose someone to be their third on the team !! They're getting stuck with Kabuto bc I find him fascinating and it'll be a fun way to get Houhua dropped onto Orochimaru's radar

However Ensui is such a fun choice too, I might have to put him in my back pocket for later use. Ur so right, any character w eyeliner immediatley deserves to be elected for plot significance

I will say, I think it'd be so fun if he was added and we did play with like. There weren't enough kids to make an even number of ino-shika-choi teams. Do u think he'd feel left out? How do you think he'd be chosen to be the one excluded that year? So many fun thoughts ,,

Might have to play with that later actually, I like the crumbs of that narrative. Idk if Houhua is gonna pass the chunin exam yet so if he doesn't, maybe his second team can include him? Hana would pass for sure, and Kabuto's whole thing is that he fails it every year.

Actually quick side, note: the fact that this is possibly Kabuto's first chunnin exam (how old is he again ?? I don't fucking remember but not that old) is interesting too, he won't know what he's going into like he does other years

Anyways team (whatever number) my beloveds <3

Does their team number change w the teachers they're given ? Bc like, they were handed to Kakashi first, which would make them team 7 (for like half a day) but after that, are they still team 7? Could be cute if they're called smthn like team 7 and a half

Their team number is constantly shifting w each new teacher they're thrown at, the other teams just start calling them team 7 and a half to make fun of them and it sticks

Team 7 and a half my beloveds <3

Actually. Thinking ab Kabuto now. Having thoughts. Experiencing emotions.

I do think the most interesting result in Houhua being on a team w him would be he recognizes that Kabuto wants to fail the exam on purpose, then somehow, some way, tricks or corners him into passing.

VERY big wrench in Kabuto's plans and Houhua is suddenly on his list of least favorite people. He has BEEF. No idea how we'd get there tho, or if I even wanna fr take it there, I just think it'd be interesting.

ANYWAYS UHH

While I'm here and talking ab the au, take this comment from the vault fic chapter where I posted about the au:

I absoloutley think Jun and Kisame should get to know eachother for sure, itd be so fun !! Idk how exactly, but if nothing else Kisame seems to be great at handling standoffish ice prince bitches (*cough* Itachi *cough*) so he should be surprisingly good w interacting w Jun !

Which also brings up the fact that like. Jun and Itachi interacting would be the funniest thing ever. Because before Itachi hearing that Houhua has some mystery relationship w this guy, they're probably just standing next to eachother in dead silence (it's very peaceful)

But then Jun gets potentially rather violently recruited into Akatsuki, so now he's being very frosty (they are still standing together in dead silence)

And then by the time he melts a little, Itachi has noted the weirdness w Houhua. And now he's being super frosty and incredibly passive aggressive. And also possibly plotting a silent murder.

But Jun has no fucking clue who Houhua even IS so he literally has nothing he can say to explain this shit to calm Itachi down. And also does not care enough to even try to explain. And also Itachi is Itachi and isn't explaining why he himself is mad anyways so Jun has no fucking way of knowing why he's even mad. Or even telling that he is mad bc hes shit at reading people

(They are still standing next to eachother in dead silence)

Kisame comments on how whenever they're w Jun, Itachi is the most animated he's ever seen him. Very impressive work there Jun!

I do not think that Itachi would make a conscious plot to pretend to be in a relationship with Kisame. But I do think it'd be really fucking funny if Itachi, completely without thinking it through, blurts out that he's in a relationship w Kisame w some very vague (and possibly a little manic) only half-thought idea of making Houhua jealous.

Kisame is ???????? but doesn't argue bc Itachi is... probably going somewhere with this? Tho he doesn't understand where.......?

Itachi immediately regrets it (his face is still dead blank and unreadable, but he's screaming internally) but refuses to backtread bc that's embarrassing. He has never admitted to a mistake in his life, and he is not going to start here. (Kisame is going to RUTHLESSLY make fun of him for all of this later, and he will deserve it)

Itachi also blurted this out like. Totally unprompted and probably in the middle of a battle. No one (especially not Houhua) fucking asked. So Houhua, very very confused, goes "????? Good for you ???????? You still murdered our entire clan tho so um ?? I'm gonna keep fighting u? If thats ok?"

(No one in this conversation is leaving with their dignity intact)

I THINK ITD BE SUPER INTERESTING IF HE DID ACTUALLY? Hmm I might have to think ab that one. I wanna make sure all the mangekyou awakenings in this au are as heavy and significant as they really should be, yk? So idk if I'd wanna use Houhua's play dead jutsu for it, it'd feel a bit cheaper to me, just a bit. But then if I played it right ig it could be as heavy as it deserves. Mmmm, choices

Kabuto and Houhua are making direct eye contact going "I smell a rat in here and I KNOW it's not just me"

[nonsscrapheap]

in most of my other fics i don't really touch upon a very fascinating aspect of transformers but i would ABSOLUTELY love to do more of in dance of the fire bot

EM Fields

when i first started writing transformers i didn't really know a lot of transformers, and i was a bit clueless about them, sometimes i would come up EM fields from fics and posts and id be 'huh, dunno what that is, ill probably learn later. later, which is now, im on my third transformers fic and i HAVE learned about Em fields but i havent exactly written them or much of it and etc.

but in dance in the fire bot you can absolutely bet that im going to go into detail about how hot rod has the NICEST em field that anyone ever experienced. does anyone remember mugen train??? the moment that kid got into tanjiro's very soul- oh it was beautiful, and so kind and just- hot rod + tanjiro = safest kindest feeling ever. like can you imagi—

===== Dance of the Fire Bot =====

Hot Rod could get away with murder in Nyon's slum district.

He could murder a bot right in front of everyone and no one would bat an optic, if anything they'd do anything to keep the little youngling from being caught if he did murder someone.

Thankfully, or disappointingly for some, Hot Rod would never actually outright murder just any bot.

He was just too kind for that.

There was a reason why Hot Rod was quickly beloved by even the grumpiest old bucket of bolts within the square mile radius despite his overly cheery nature that was not suited for the current environment or era.

Hot Rod's electromagnetic field was just so... soft and warm and nice just to almost anyone he met.

Being so young, his control over his EM Field was abysmal, and yet it was very much welcomed to the scarred sparks and hardened frames that littered the Rust Narrows who had long forgotten what a kind spark was like.

Even the other sparklings ' EM fields failed to even match the sheer sensation of Hot Rod's blinding smile and emotions.

Quite honestly, if it weren't for Hot Rod's olfacotry senses (later on, his actual ability to set himself on fire) they would have thought that Hot Rod's outlier ability was being able to use his EM Field to calm anyone down or just, influence everyone to a better mood.

If there was a fight between bots, Hot Rod was around to smooth the jagged edges and scold the fighters while waves of gentle concern and kindness leapt off of the young cybertronian's frame.

The young brats of Nyon would follow Hot Rod around just to bask in his kindness, always jealous of Springer and Arcee who always stuck close to Hot Rod and enjoyed the benefits of being his unit, and one day; his Amicas.

Everyone of Rust Narrows would mourn when Hot Rod finally learned to reign his Em Field in, but there'd be moments where Hot Rod's Em Field would wash over all those around him. During times of great fear, a wave of brave and gentle determination would wrap around those near him, chasing the negativity away.

===== Dance of the Fire Bot =====

i'm just giving hot rod more and more abilities here.

oh yeah, decepticons stand NO CHANCE to hot rod's em field of calm kindness warmth gentleness happiness-

deadlock barely escaped once, he never got the second chance. not only because of the sword swings but also because of hot rod's em field.

also i can imagine ratchet taking advantage of hot rod's em field to calm patients but OH GOD WAIT WHAT IF I SHIFT THINGS AROUND AND HAVE HOT ROD BE THERE FOR DRIFT AT DEAD END SOMEHOW??? IDK HOW ITD WORK BUT AAAAAAA—

i really have no idea what im doing for the continuity of dance of the fire bots but im just having fun thinking of hot rod continuously making bots fall in love with him.

[oldiesstationlover11607]

HI BESTIEEEE

okay okay. idea. joshs sister reader x tyler.

kinda like the sai!josh x tylers sister reader one where theyd been sevretly dating.

same kinda premise but like josh is realy realllyyy not okay with tyler dating his sister, like itd been a big nono since he inteoduced them to each other. but one night they both like bonded over something and the connection kept going. then josh finds out whem he comes into her room quickly for something he left and sees tyler in her bed and he freaks out thinking they slept together. they have to explain that theyd been dating for a while (like lonnngg while) and josh gets super angry.

ik the josh x reader one had a happy ending.. maybe this one ends angstily or not good at all. you can decide. love your work <33

HAVE A GOOD DAY!!🧡🧡

Off Limits - Tyler Joseph x Dun!Reader

Warnings: Panic attacks and angst/argument between Josh and reader

Word Count: 2331

A/N: As soon as I saw this request I started chucking out ideas of how they met, Tyler helping her through anxiety and mental health struggles, them blasting music in the car, basically being perfect for each other. Poor Josh tho...

It was one of those rare quiet nights in LA, where the city’s usual noise was replaced by an almost eerie calm. The kind of stillness that makes you hyper aware of every breath you take, every beat of your heart. I lay in bed, staring at the TV that flickered in the corner of my room, barely paying attention to whatever show was on. My mind was too crowded to focus on anything.

Tyler had been at the studio all day, and I knew he’d be coming home late. Josh had been there, too, working on drum takes for Blurryface—their latest obsession, the album that had consumed their lives. Mine, too. But tonight, the emptiness in the house felt different. Maybe it was because I was too restless, or maybe it was the weight of the secret that I carried every day. The one that Tyler and I carried together.

Two years. Two years of hiding. Two years of stolen moments. Two years of lying to my brother.

My brother had introduced us at a party back when Vessel was starting to gain traction. I still remember that night—Josh had been so excited to show me off to his bandmate, like I was some prized possession. I’d tried to be cool, tried not to let on that I was immediately fascinated by Tyler’s tattoos, his quiet demeanor, the way he seemed so different from the crowd. But I guess I wasn’t as subtle as I thought.

Josh pulled me aside that night, his expression dark. I can still hear his words, sharp and cutting: “Stay away from him. He’s off-limits. You can’t have him, okay? You have to promise me.”

And because I didn’t want to lose my brother, because I didn’t want to make him angry, I promised. I promised I wouldn’t fall for Tyler, that I wouldn’t get involved with him.

But here I was, two years later, breaking that promise every single day.

I pulled the covers up to my chin, trying to shake the feeling of unease that had settled in my chest. It wasn’t that I didn’t want to be with Tyler—I loved him more than I’d ever thought possible. He was the only person who really understood me, especially during the roughest period of my life. He’d been there for me when everything else fell apart. But the guilt gnawed at me every day. I hated lying to Josh. I hated sneaking around. Most of all, I hated the feeling that this was all going to blow up in our faces one day.

I heard the front door open and close softly, followed by Tyler’s familiar footsteps padding down the hallway. My heart lifted at the sound, the tension in my chest easing slightly. A moment later, he slipped into the room, his presence instantly bringing a sense of calm. Just seeing him made everything feel a little less heavy.

He looked exhausted—worn out from hours of recording, his dark hair tousled from the day. His eyes, though heavy-lidded with fatigue, softened when he saw me. He kicked off his shoes and flopped down on the bed next to me with a sigh.

“Rough day?” I asked, my voice barely more than a whisper, afraid to disturb the quiet between us.

He let out a deep breath, rolling onto his side to face me. “Yeah,” he muttered, his voice low and tired. “I don’t even know what time it is anymore. It’s all blending together.”

I nodded, reaching up to brush a stray curl away from his forehead. “It felt like that during Vessel too. It’ll get easier.”

His eyes met mine, and for a moment, the weight of everything we had been hiding seemed to hang between us. But then Tyler leaned in, gently kissing my forehead, lingering there for a second longer than usual. It was soft, comforting—the kind of kiss that didn’t need words. It was enough to make the world feel a little smaller, a little more bearable.

“Being here with you… it’s the only thing that makes sense right now,” he murmured against my skin.

I smiled at that, my heart swelling. “I feel the same.”

Tyler shifted closer, wrapping his arm around my waist and pulling me into his chest. I rested my head against him, the steady thump of his heartbeat soothing the chaos in my mind. He kissed the top of my head, his lips brushing through my hair, and I felt myself melt into him, the weight of the day slipping away.

“You’ve got to be tired,” I said softly, my fingers tracing the patterns of his tattoos across his chest.

“I am,” he admitted, his voice a little drowsy now. “But I’m always good when I’m with you.” His hand moved up my back, fingers gently brushing the skin there, and I could feel his love in every movement, in every touch.

“Sometimes I wish we didn’t have to keep hiding like this,” I confessed quietly, not sure where the words were coming from. “I hate lying to Josh. I hate that this is all so complicated.”

Tyler sighed, his thumb stroking soothing circles on my side. “I know. I hate it too. But… I don’t know how else we can do this without hurting him. I just need more time to figure it out.” He kissed the top of my head again, this time lingering a little longer, as if he could press his understanding into me through the warmth of his lips.

I lifted my head slightly, just enough to look into his eyes. “I don’t want to lose you… but I don’t want to lose Josh either.”

Tyler’s gaze softened, his eyes filled with that quiet understanding I’d grown to love. “You won’t lose either of us,” he said, his voice steady and sure. “We’ll find a way. We always do.”

He leaned in then, his lips brushing against mine, a soft, tender kiss that made everything else fade into the background. I kissed him back, my hand resting against his cheek as I let myself fall into the moment, into the safety of him.

When we finally pulled apart, our foreheads rested together, our breaths mingling in the quiet of the room. Tyler’s fingers traced down my arm, his touch gentle and reassuring.

“I love you,” he whispered, the words a soft promise between us. “I’ve got you.”

My heart fluttered at his words, the love I felt for him swelling inside me. I kissed him again, this time slower, more deliberate. I wanted him to feel everything I couldn’t always say out loud.

“I love you too,” I whispered against his lips, my voice breaking just a little. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.”

Tyler smiled, pressing another soft kiss to my lips before settling back into the bed, pulling me even closer into his chest. His hand slipped under the hem of my shirt, resting gently on the skin of my back, the warmth of his touch grounding me.

“For now, let’s just focus on this,” he murmured, his voice low and soothing. “Right here. Just us.”

I nodded, letting out a breath I didn’t realize I’d been holding. Wrapped up in Tyler’s arms, with his heartbeat beneath my ear and his soft breaths lulling me into a sense of safety, it felt like for just a little while, the outside world didn’t exist.

The worry about Josh, the guilt that gnawed at me every day—it all seemed to fade in the warmth of Tyler’s embrace. Here, like this, I could pretend that everything was going to be okay.

I must have dozed off because the next thing I knew, it was morning. The sunlight filtered weakly through the curtains, casting a soft glow over the room. Tyler was still asleep next to me, his arm draped over my waist. I watched him for a moment, feeling that familiar mix of love and guilt twist inside of me. He looked so peaceful, so unlike the Tyler everyone saw on stage or in the studio. This was a Tyler only I knew—the one who was soft, thoughtful, and quiet in the way he cared for me.

I shifted slightly, trying to disentangle myself without waking him, but before I could, the door burst open with a loud thud.

“Hey, have you seen my—”

Josh’s voice cut through the air, and the moment he laid eyes on us, everything seemed to freeze. My heart dropped into my stomach. Tyler stirred beside me, blinking awake, but I could already feel the tension crackling in the air. This was it. This was the moment I’d been dreading.

Josh stood there in the doorway, his face pale with shock. For a second, it was like he couldn’t even process what he was seeing. But then, his expression twisted into something darker—betrayal, anger, hurt—all at once.

“What the hell is this?” His voice was loud, harsher than I’d ever heard it before.

Tyler sat up slowly, his movements cautious, but I could already see the storm brewing behind Josh’s eyes.

“Josh, wait, it’s not what you—” I started, but my voice faltered.

Josh’s eyes flicked to me, filled with disbelief and fury. “You swore to me! You swore you wouldn’t—” He looked between us, his jaw clenched so tight I thought it might break. “How long?”

His voice cracked on those last two words, and I couldn’t find the strength to answer. I felt frozen in place, my heart racing, panic rising in my throat.

Tyler finally spoke, his voice calm but firm. “Josh, we’ve been together for a while. We didn’t mean to lie to you—”

“A while?” Josh’s voice was shaking now, disbelief mixed with fury. “How long, Tyler?”

Tyler glanced at me, and I knew we couldn’t hide it anymore. “Two years,” he said quietly.

Josh’s face drained of color. He stared at us like we’d ripped his heart out. “Two years? You’ve been lying to me for two fucking years?” His voice rose, cracking at the edges. “You’re my sister. You’re supposed to have my back! I told you not to—”

He stepped forward, his body tense with anger, and instinctively, I flinched. I didn’t even realize I’d done it until he stopped, his eyes widening. For a split second, the anger on his face shifted to something else. 

“You were supposed to stay away from him,” he said, his voice lower now, but still filled with anger. “You knew what this would do to us. And you still…” He trailed off, shaking his head in disbelief.

I wanted to explain, to tell him how much I loved Tyler, how this wasn’t some betrayal. But the words wouldn’t come. All I could feel was the crushing weight of Josh’s anger, the way it radiated off him in waves.

“Josh, it’s not like that,” I finally managed to say, my voice shaking. “I didn’t mean to hurt you. But Tyler—he’s been there for me in ways you wouldn’t understand. I needed him.”

“Needed him?” Josh repeated, his eyes narrowing. “What about me? I’m your brother. I’m supposed to be the one you go to.”

“I–I…” I turned to Tyler before stepping towards Josh, but my legs felt shaky, my chest tightening as the familiar sense of panic started to creep in. I could feel my breath catching, like I couldn’t get enough air. I’d been here before—too many times. I could feel the panic attack coming on, but I didn’t know how to stop it.

Josh’s eyes locked on mine, and for a moment, I saw his anger flicker, replaced by confusion. “What the hell is going on with you?”

“I—” My voice came out strangled, and I could feel the tears welling up in my eyes, my hands shaking. I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think. The walls felt like they were closing in.

Tyler was beside me in an instant, his arm around my shoulders, trying to steady me. “Josh, stop. She’s having a panic attack.”

Josh’s face softened with shock, but it was too late. The room was spinning, my heart racing too fast. I couldn’t control it. I could hear Tyler’s voice, calm and steady, trying to guide me through it, but Josh was still standing there, frozen, watching me fall apart.

“I’m sorry,” I whispered, my voice barely audible as the tears finally broke free. “I didn’t mean to—”

Tyler’s voice was in my ear, soft and comforting. “It’s okay. You’re okay. Just breathe.”

But I wasn’t okay. I couldn’t stop thinking about the look on Josh’s face, the anger and hurt I’d caused. The way he looked at me like I was someone he didn’t even recognize anymore.

“I didn’t mean to hurt you,” I sobbed, trying to get the words out, but they felt empty. “Josh, please…”

“I’m sorry,” Josh said, his voice small now, filled with regret. “I didn’t know—I didn’t mean to yell at you.”

But it didn’t matter anymore. The damage was done. The weight of everything we’d kept hidden, everything we’d tried to protect, had finally come crashing down.

And now, I didn’t know if we could ever put the pieces back together.

Josh left, and the silence he left behind was almost unbearable. Tyler held me, rocking gently as I cried, but even his presence couldn’t fix the shattered pieces of what I’d broken.

After what felt like hours, my sobs finally subsided, leaving me hollow, exhausted.

“He’s going to hate me forever,” I whispered, my voice hoarse.

Tyler kissed the top of my head, his voice soft and steady. “He won’t. He’ll need time, but he won’t hate you.”

But I wasn’t sure I believed him.

We sat there, tangled in each other’s arms, the weight of what had happened settling heavily over us. Tyler held me, and I held onto him, but deep down, I knew that some things couldn’t be fixed. Not easily.

Not this time.

//

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