#i can do the ‘proper’ thing and work out and eat healthy and have no results for four years

[kabutone]

i’ve been on a huge like self improvement kick today so i’ve been looking at skincare stuff and like the way beauty standards have infected the minds of everyone especially young women is so scary . like what are we doing to our beautiful queens

[biscuitdolly]

୨ৎ absolute necessities .ᐟ

if you're trying to glow up, get healthier, etc, these are the very basics that you absolutely NEED to follow!

01, WATER .ᐟ

Staying hydrated is crucial for your health and wellbeing. While the recommended daily intake is 8 cups of water, you can gradually increase your consumption over a few weeks if that seems too overwhelming. Drinking enough water provides numerous benefits, from clearing skin and flushing out waste, to boosting exercise performance and supporting weight loss. Despite being the very essence that sustains life, water is often underappreciated.

02, FOOD .ᐟ

I used to skip breakfast, thinking it would help me lose weight. However, studies show that those who eat breakfast tend to lose more weight and keep it off longer. The truth is, food is incredibly important. It's best to regulate your eating habits by consuming at least 3 meals per day, even if they're only small portions. Some food is better than no food. If you want to go on a diet, that's fine! but make sure you research healthy dieting methods. At a minimum, eat one serving of fruits and vegetables daily, and try to increase that to five servings per day if possible. Proper nutrition is key for your overall health.

03, HOBBIES .ᐟ

i have this previous post regarding hobbies you could try! It's so important to find fun activities that you genuinely enjoy and look forward to doing. Hobbies add fun to your life and pose as a nice break from technology and the stress of work and school. They also greatly improve symptoms of depression and anxiety. You could do some physical activity, such as a sport you like, or something more calm and creative, like painting or writing.

04, SLEEP .ᐟ

a lot of people struggle to fall asleep at a decent time. Try getting ready for bed early. Personally, I tend to take off my make up and do my skincare immediately after i come home for school/work so i don't have to worry about it before bed.

Technology is probably your sleeping schedule's worst enemy, as the blue light from the screen keeps your brain awake, so try to pause screen-related activities at least an hour before bed. Also, try not to snack 2 - 4 hours before you go to sleep. This is because lying down makes it harder for your body to digest food, which can result in sleeplessness.

Forcing yourself to go to bed super early isn't helpful either. Like I've mentioned in my other points, take things slow and gradual!

05, SOCIALIZATION .ᐟ

Engaging in simple social interactions, such as conversing with family, seeing friends, or greeting people on the street, is incredibly important. Isolating yourself in your room all day accomplishes nothing.

There was a time when I dreaded spending time with friends, convinced I lacked the energy or mood. However, once I forced myself to make plans, I realized how much I genuinely enjoyed their company. Other people are what make life truly worthwhile. So why not reach out to a friend right now and invite them to hang out tomorrow?

06, ACTIVITY .ᐟ

you don't need an exercise routine if you don't want one, but simple physical activity is still a daily necessity! At least 30 minutes is recommended. Personally, i most enjoy plugging in my headphones and going on a walk around my neighbourhood for an hour or two.

07, SELF TALK .ᐟ

Arguably one of my most important points, quit the self-deprecating talk. You never realize how much it affects you until you quit it. Yes, you can absolutely get that assessment done. Yes, you are a likable and amazing person. Just keep affirming and reminding yourself that you are worthy, and you will attract so many good things. Trust me, it will help you so much in the long run.

[malusokay]

How to be like Jang Wonyoung

As many of you requested, part 2 of my it girls series is all about Jang Wonyeong, who's not only absolutely STUNNING, but also incredibly talented, hardworking, and of course successful. Let's get right into it!! <33

Wonyoungs Energy:

Wonyoung is incredibly charismatic, which makes her stand out without even trying!!

She has a bubbly and likeable Personality, Wonyoung appears happy and welcoming, she easily lights up a room with just her presence.

Aside from being cute and cheerful, Wonyoung is also known for being extremely hardworking!!

Confident and Unbothered. Despite receiving quite a bit of unnecessary hate, Wonyoung stays indifferent and true to herself!!

Elegant and feminine. No one does the ‘Elegant feminine self-love girly’ aesthetic like her, she is THE girly girl!! <3

Mindset:

Learn to deal with jealousy, Wonyoung gets plenty of hate, but let's be real for a second… we all know that is because of jealousy. Pretty, successful, smart, and popular? Of course, people will be jealous!!

“While practising self-love, you see good and pretty things about yourself. If I focus only on those things, I don't need to pay much attention to the criticism.”

Don't compare yourself to others “You are you, I am me”.

Keep to yourself. Stop telling people your ideas, your dreams and how you plan to archive them, your goals etc. Let your actions speak for themself!! <3

No more negative self-talk!!

Be your number 1 priority!! Take care of yourself, do what's good for you, eat well, care for your body, skincare, haircare, and your education!! PRIORITIES

Skincare

Skincare. Wonyoung has Flawless skin, finding a skincare routine that works for you can help you archive similar results!!

Wonyoungs skincare routine:

According to Google, Wonyoung only uses Innisfree products and starts by double cleansing her face, for that, she uses the Green Tea Cleansing Oil ($24), and the Green Tea Amino Acid Face Cleanser ($12)

To get the dewy class skin effect, hydration is key!! In the morning, Wonyoung likes using the Green Tea Hyaluronic Acid Serum ($30) and the Dewy Glow Tone-up Cream ($26)

Of course, you can't forget SPF. Wonyoung uses the Mild Cica Sunscreen Tone-Up SPF 50+ PA ++++, which is also great for acne-prone and sensitive skin types!! :)

For her night routine, she likes the Retinol Cica Moisture Recovery Serum ($37) and the Dewy Glow Jelly Cream ($26).

Elevate your daily life:

Healthy diet. Eating nutritious and healthy food is the first and most important step to clear skin and an overall good feeling!! Make sure to eat enough protein (ex. yoghurt, chicken, tofu or eggs), lots of fruits and veggies, and healthy fats (ex. Avocados, fish, nuts, olive oil)!!

Exercise daily. Besides dancing, Wonyoung loves pilates!! You can find lots of great Pilates videos on YouTube!!

Work on your posture!! Having good posture will not only make you feel better but also lets you appear more confident, elegant and put together. Try daily stretching and exercises to improve it <3

Try establishing a proper morning and night routine, this can help you stay structured and relaxed even on more messy and busy days.

Content that makes you feel better!! Start watching channels like thewizardliz, vogue beauty secrets, and read motivating blogs. (like mine lol <3)

Makeup:

Wonyoung is known for her iconic glittery and feminine make-up!!

Light pink blush, plump lips, glowy skin and a glittery but not too heavy eye look.

Foundation on the centre of your face and blend outwards for a naturally contoured look.

Always apply your matt products before your shimmers, that way, your makeup looks cleaner!! Also, apply your glitters from finest to chunkiest. :)

Don't apply your shimmers/glitters past the middle of your eyelid to avoid looking puffy.

If you have warm-toned skin, go for peachy glitters, for cool-toned skin, choose a champagne-coloured one.

If your struggle with dark under eyes, blend your concealer with your fingers!! This will give it a lot more coverage.

You can find lots of tutorials on Wonyoung-inspired make-up on YouTube, this one is my favourite.

I hope this little guide was helpful, I wasn't too familiar with Wonyoung, but I did some research since she was the number 1 most requested person for this!! :)

As always, please feel free to share your own suggestions in the comments and let me know who you want me to write about next! <3

✩‧₊*:・love ya ･:*₊‧✩

[richarlotte]

Most important steps to your glow up?

Top Tier.

Braces.

I had my braces on for 18 months, and they were the best decision of my life. I can breathe better, my jaw and chin look better, my teeth are straight, and I have no more pain. Facial harmony is everything, and mine was restored by an expert orthodontist and continued use of my retainers. Jaw surgery wasn’t reasonable or necessary, but I can’t even begin to describe the impact that dental whitening, braces, weight loss, and proper dental care work had on my face.

 

Electrolytes and Hydration.

I was severely dehydrated and in need of electrolytes for years and years. I thought that drinking enough water wasn’t as important as people made it seem, but my life changed when I started to do it. Life feels much less stressful now that I’m properly hydrated, and I make sure to toss a little lemon and salt in my water and drink a Gatorade or Liquid IV to get electrolytes.

 

Darker and Longer Hair.

I look better with hair that’s long, dark, and thick. I have alopecia, so I did a number of things to disguise my hair loss growing up, but I wear wigs now that my hair is gone. I was told to wear my hair long, dark, and straight last year, and whenever I do, people tell me that I look otherworldly. Now that I know what to do with my hair and what looks best, I’m a million times more confident about myself.

 

Less Dairy.

I am not lactose intolerant, but I do not need to be eating dairy in excess. I enjoy dairy, so I won’t cut it out of my diet, but I don’t need to be eating it in the amount that I did. I was bloated, always breaking out, and tired all the time, but my low energy dissipated the second I cut my dairy intake. I’m not 100% dairy-free and most likely won’t ever be, but I’m careful with the amount I consume.

 

Korean Contact Lenses.

Americans think that all colored contact lenses are unnatural, and American-made colored contacts are. I use Olens contacts and only use the dark shades, and they’re amazing. I find that having huge, dark, striking eyes helps me get exactly what I want, and I love the way I look when I’m wearing contacts. I use contacts to craft my look and emphasize my eyes, and I never buy or use colors that aren’t brown or black. Wearing dark contacts has reduced my need for so much bright eye makeup; they make me look friendlier, and I look better in photos.

 

Better Quality Makeup.

Investing in higher-quality makeup and actually learning how to apply it was crucial. Buying Hourglass, Pat McGrath, Charlotte Tilbury, MAC, and Nars was sort of essential to my makeup journey, and I look much better now that I’ve invested the time and money into learning about makeup. Dupes just don’t hold up to the real things, and I look better now that I’m spending $45 on one product instead of spending $45 on five different products to try to replicate the look.

 

Urea, Glutamic Acid, and Dry Brushing.

I used to have serious strawberry arms and legs, dry skin, and dark spots from body acne, but all of that has cleared up. Hyaluronic acid and body serums have nothing on this combo, and dry brushing has completely cleared up my rough skin and helped with my stretch marks. If you want skin that’s plump, hydrated, glowing, and looks healthy, then you have to exfoliate your dry and wet skin and start using this trio to care for your body.

 

Better Skincare Products.

I invested a lot in using fancy designer brands, but the things that helped me the most were basic, unscented, and quality. I use Paula’s Choice exfoliant, plenty of SPF 100, retinol, and a variety of Korean and American products. My facial acne is gone, my dark marks are cleared, my skin barrier is healed, my skin looks healthier, and I’m glowing. Drunk Elephant, celebrity skincare brands, and trending products didn’t do it for me; figuring out what I needed and then implementing it into my routine helped.

 

Creating my own aesthetic.

I won’t stop talking about The Blend because it helped me become who I am today. I wanted to create a look that would help me, and so I had to spend months solidifying my image. It took me a year to get to where I am today, but life became easier once I was able to figure out what I should be doing, what I should be saving for or investing in, and what suited me. The Blend isn’t just about style, and I had to be scientific with it at times and really work with the resources I had and what was readily accessible to me.

I can do Mid Tier next.

[gallusrostromegalus]

I love Kenpachi "Raised By Eagles" Zaraki, and learning how this affects his behavior and worldview but how does this change Yachiru?

Kenpachi might be human-shaped but he's a bird to the core. How bird like is Yachiru as a consequence? Is her first language Eagle as well? Has she met her extended family (grandmother, aunts, perhaps cousins too) and had flying lessons?

I just love the image of Yachiru being a Chaotic Fledgling, and behind her is a grinning Kenpachi that is just as much a Buck Wild Bird, he's just better at playing at being human.

(if kenpachi is a prince, is yachiru thus a princess?)

One Small Correction: Kenpachi is a Sword Guy at his deepest core, but he still considers himself Culturally Eagle, but also that's only one of like 147 Identities he uses. Man collects personas and cultures and memes and jobs and identities like lint, but don't worry- that's just how Things Like Him live.

Kenpachi is also, technically, a Prince, and if he wasn't allergic to honorifics, he would be well within his rights to tell the Kuchiki clan to call him "Kotaishi-Denka", but he doesn't like being called a title he didn't earn. Moreover, he can only tell the nobles that little fun fact *once*, so he's keeping it in his back pocket for the most opportune moment.

Don't Worry about it :)

As for Yachiru:

It's a tough call which is her first language because Kenpachi was speaking to her in Japanese and Eagle and the language of the Northern Tribes he spent a lot of his adolescence with, and the common language of the small spirits like Kodama and Koropokkur when she was an infant and learned them all simultaneously.

Japanese is actually Zaraki's fifth language, and he's been learning how to talk shit in Spanish recently.

Eagle is definitely Yachiru's favorite language to swear in though. Nothing quite as cathartic as a good screech that blasphemes six different gods and curses the object of offense for seven generations in both directions.

Yachiru's gestures and posture are... odd. Some are distinctly Eagle, but she's a constant finger-drummer and hummer, lies and sleeps on her stomach as a matter of preference, walks as easily on her hands as her feet, and writes as easily with her toes as her fingers.

Some of that is learned Directly from her father, but a lot of it seems to be her own peculiarities that all children develop but most have harassed out of them by their parents. Kenpachi had little regard for "proper" behavior out of a child, beyond not endangering herself or getting him in undue trouble. He also has a lot of strange ways of moving that his Mother never tried to correct out of him, so they're both odd birds in that both of them are about five steps to the left of any ind of typical and don't mask a goddamn thing.

As for Yachiru's Extended Family, she occupies a unique position in the family of She Who Rules The Sky.

Yachiru is Her first grandchild.

Oh, certainly, She has laid and raised many, many generations of Eagle, but per tradition and common sense, they move far, far away from Her before having their own offspring to avoid competing with Her, and their children do the same. But Kenpachi comes to visit his Mother and sisters- a strange thing, but he's not eating the same food or trying to build a nest in the same place, so it works.

She Who Rules The Sky is DELIGHTED by Her Granddaughter, and spoils Yachiru rotten with attention and fresh kills and embarrassing stories about her father when he was young.

At least some of the way Yachiru hangs off Kenpachi's back is based on how he learned how to hang onto his Mother during Flying lessons, and how her grandmother taught her to do the same, but hanging onto Her neck, on account of how small Yachiru is.

She Who Rules The Sky and both Yachiru's Aunts are all very concerned about how small she is. Her appetite is certainly healthy enough, but she grows so slowly. Zaraki's assurances that there are Human Women he works with that are full-grown adults scarcely half again Yachiru's size does nothing to avail their fears, and makes Rukia sneeze.

Zaraki's sisters have not taken Names either, but for the sake of convenience, they allow Yachiru to call them Ane-Oba and Imuto-Oba, as Kenpachi is the middle sibling, according to order of appearance in the nest.

Eagle kinship terminology is different than human in that only the siblings from the same clutch are your brothers or sisters, and who is the older or younger is determined by the hatching order rather than laying order. Your mother's previous clutches are your aunts and uncles, and your mother's clutch-mates are also your aunts and uncles, but with a higher level of grammatical deference. "Grandparent" is an entirely novel concept to Eagles, who almost never meet theirs, and hearing how active grandmothers are in the raising of their grandchildren fascinates She Who Rules The Sky.

Consequently, Kenpachi isn't a Prince because he's an Eagle.

He's a Prince because She Who Rules The Sky is a straight-up Kami, and a big damn deal, because She has jurisdiction over EVERYTHING in the sky- Other birds, Weather, Shinigami if they go higher than the roof of the tallest building in a square mile, the fucking moon (technically), Bats (but only when they come out at night. What they do in caves is none of Her business and also She doesn't want to think about it.), and anything some idiot might try shooting at Her.

"Prince" isn't quite accurate- it's not an inherited title, but She Who Rules The Sky told Kenpachi after he became a captain to Officially Manage whatever Humans and Shinigami were doing in the sky for Her, on account of being closer and having at least one eye to keep on them.

So technically he's a Nepo Unpaid Intern, but a Nepo Unpaid Intern that could smote anybody right out of the air, so most birds and lesser Kami use the more respectful title of "Prince" instead.

He does not use this ability often, because he'd rather try to get someone to fight him, but he does not hold back with it where mosquitoes are concerned.

It's cromulent to Eagles that he should inherit the responsibility though, because it's usually the youngest clutch that inherit a nest site or hunting territory upon the demise of a parent, and while She shows no signs of dying any time soon, it's the way of Kami to train and hand off lesser responsibilities to their children as their domains expand.

Hence, Yachiru is not a Princess in the sense that she has a title to inherit, but she is one in that Kenpachi trusts everything she tells him and defers to her on things like "math" and "where the fuck are we going?" because she's better at those than he is, and in that sense, she is his Princess.

[cutecurly-hair]

Hearts Unleashed (Part 6)

Pairing: Nick Nelson x Black!fem!reader

Warning: Fluff, Smut in later chapters, Body Shaming

Words: 6,417

It has been a minute since I uploaded, but I made it up to yall by making this chapter a LOT longer. Enjoy!

"You don't know what you're talking about," I finished as I bit into my banana. Charlie rolled his eyes for the fifth time this morning, taking a bit of his breakfast sandwich and throwing the rest in the garbage.

"I swear your love life needs some proper tending to or it is just going to end up nonexistent,"

"How can you throw that away, I could have finished it for you," I protested, looking at banana resentfully. Mother only gives me fruits for breakfast or protein bars since she thinks having carbs first thing in the morning is terrible for the diet.

Charlie shook his head, his expression a mix of amusement "The sandwich was terrible, you wouldn't like it," which I knew was a lie.

"Ok enough about me, what about you! How are you and that guy you were talking with I completely forgot his name," Charlie face fell, quickly regretting on even asking.

Charlie scratched his head, a sheepish grin appearing on his face. "Um, actually, I decided to break things off."

I blinked, surprised by his response. "You did? Why?"

Charlie sighed; his expression somber. "It's just… things weren't working out between us. We wanted different things, and it was causing too much strain on the relationship. If there was even a relationship"

"I'm sorry to hear that," I said, genuinely feeling for him. "Are you okay?"

He nodded, though his smile was wistful. "Yeah, I'll be fine. It's for the best, really."

I reached out, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. "If you need anything, I'm here for you, Charlie."

"Thanks, Y/N," he said, his voice appreciative. "I appreciate that." I knew something was up, he had that look on his face far too long, I can tell it's starting to eat him up badly.

As we walked towards the school gates, I noticed a gathering of the rugby team, and my heart sank as I recognized Nick among them. And standing right beside him was Imogen.

"Just when you think things couldn't get any worse," I muttered under my breath.

Charlie's expression darkened as he caught sight of them too. "Of all the days..."

I could feel Charlie's stare intensely at the side of my skull, his concern palpable. It was clear that seeing Nick and Imogen was the last thing I needed on top of everything else.

"Do you want to, you know, avoid them?" Charlie asked quietly, already knowing the answer.

I let out a resigned sigh. "I wish we could, but unfortunately I have practice with him after school." We haven't talked ever since that night, he hasn't messaged me, and I haven't messaged him. It seems that everything has been put on pause I swear this boy is just giving me a straight whiplash to Tara Jones and now Imogen.

"You can probably ditch," Charlie suggested, offering a glimmer of hope. "I'm sure Coach Singh won't mind, plus I can probably cover for you."

The thought of skipping practice tempted me, but then I remembered the inevitable consequence: being bombarded by my mother's relentless fitness regimen. She had been devouring articles on quick weight loss methods before spring started, and I wasn't ready to endure another lecture about healthy living.

I shook my head firmly. "Nope, I will definitely be at practice. I'll just head to the library and study while I wait for them to finish, then clean the locker room." he nodded in understanding.

"Thanks, Charlie," I said sincerely, feeling grateful for his support. But as I glanced over at Nick, I noticed him saying something to Imogen, causing her cheeks to flush with a bright smile. My mouth turned sour, and I quickly grabbed Charlie's arm, leading him through the gates.

"Let's go before we miss out on breakfast from the cafeteria," I urged, my tone a little more urgent than intended.

Charlie furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. "But we just ate?"

I swallowed hard, my stomach tying into knots. "I'm still hungry,"

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +

Anywhere else in the world would be better than this classroom right now. I sink into my seat, doing everything I can to avoid looking at the one person I wish I could avoid the most.

I should have just skipped school entirely

"Hi,"

I glanced up reluctantly, meeting Nick's gaze. His smile was warm, but it only intensified the knot in my stomach.

"Hi," I replied, keeping my tone neutral.

His brow furrowed slightly, sensing my unease. "Is everything okay?"

I forced a smile, hoping it looked convincing. "Yeah, everything's fine. Just not feeling great today."

There was a moment of hesitation in his expression before he spoke again, his voice softer this time. "Do you want to go to Harry's party... with me?"

My heart skipped a beat at his unexpected invitation. I blinked, caught off guard "I don't think it's my type of thing and if it's for Harry definitely count me out," The guy was just a straight up asshole, there is nothing that can make me like that man, especially with the awful things he says.

"Please come. I want you to be there," he looked at me hopefully, and I couldn't ignore the sincerity in his eyes. It almost hurt to see him like this, his vulnerability making me soften.

"Okay," I smiled sheepishly, feeling a little guilty for giving in so easily. I could practically feel Charlie's eyes boring into the side of my head, likely already knowing that I was about to agree.

---

"I can't believe you did that," Charlie sighed, shaking his head. "I swear, you have the willpower of a peanut."

I chuckled nervously, feeling a flush of embarrassment creeping up my neck. "Yeah, well… he practically begged me. There's no way I could have said no."

Charlie raised an eyebrow, a skeptical look on his face. "Begged you, huh? Sounds like quite the convincing argument."

I shifted uncomfortably under his gaze. "Well, you know Nick. He can be quite persuasive when he wants to be."

Charlie sighed, shaking his head in mock disbelief. "I swear, you're like putty in his hands."

I rolled my eyes but couldn't help the small smile tugging at my lips. "Yeah, yeah, laugh it up. But I'm sure it'll be fine. Especially since you're coming with me."

Charlie raised an eyebrow in surprise. "Wait, what? I didn't agree to that."

I grinned, nudging him playfully. "Come on, Charlie. You can't let me face this party alone. Besides, it'll be more bearable with you there."

He sighed dramatically but smiled back. "Fine, I'll go. But only because I don't trust you to stay out of trouble on your own."

"Deal," I said, feeling a bit more confident about the party with Charlie by my side.

----------

The afternoon sun was beginning to set as Charlie and I rummaged through my closet, looking for something decent to wear to Harry’s party. My room was a mess, clothes strewn everywhere as we tried to find the perfect outfit.

Charlie held up a shirt, scrutinizing it before tossing it aside. “This one’s too plain. You need something that stands out.”

I groaned, flopping down on my bed. “I don’t even know why I agreed to this. Harry’s parties are always so... Harry.”

Charlie laughed, shaking his head. “Agree, but you’re doing this for Nick, remember? And besides, it’ll be good to get out and have some fun.”

I shot him a skeptical look. “You think hanging out with Harry and his crowd is fun?”

He thought for a moment, pulling out a vibrant top from the pile. "Absolutely not but we must preserve. But at least you won’t be alone. We’ll stick together.”"

I took the top from him, eyeing it critically. “Alright, I guess this could work. What about you? What are you wearing?”

He smirked, holding up a simple yet stylish outfit. “Already got it covered. Unlike you, I came prepared.”

I rolled my eyes but couldn’t help but smile. “Show-off.”

Charlie threw a pillow at me, laughing. “Hey, someone’s got to keep us looking decent.”

As I changed into the outfit he picked, Charlie sat on the edge of my bed, giving me a thumbs-up when I emerged from behind the closet door. “See? You look great. Nothing to worry about”

Just then, Charlie's phone buzzed, and I noticed his smile falter as he looked at the screen.

"Shit!" he muttered under his breath.

I turned to him, concerned. "What’s wrong?"

"Tao and Elle just texted me about film night tonight! I completely forgot," typing furiously on his phone.

Trying to lighten the mood, I suggested, "Hey, why don't we invite Tao and Elle? Nick definitely won't mind."

Charlie shook his head, a wry smile playing on his lips. "Tao would rather be caught dead than step foot into one of Harry's parties."

I laughed, nodding in agreement. "Yeah, you're right. But it’d be nice to have them around."

Charlie sighed, glancing at his phone again. "It's fine. Elle's going over there, and Isaac called in sick. He'll be okay," he said, slipping the phone into his back pocket.

I could already tell I was at the very top of Tao's shit list, and it wasn’t about to get any better.

We were halfway out the door when my mom's voice rang out, stopping us in our tracks.

"Do you kids need a ride?" she asked, looking up from her magazine with a hint of concern in her eyes.

I shook my head, forcing a smile. "No, thanks. Charlie's dad already offered to give us a lift."

"Alright then," she said, her gaze sweeping over my outfit. I can feel the eyes pouring at every single detail of what I was wearing, I knew she wouldn't say anything infront Charlie, she wouldn't do that to me "But honey, make sure to suck in your stomach. It looks a little chubby."

I was wrong

My cheeks burned with embarrassment as I forced a smile. "Got it, Mom."

Charlie gave me a sympathetic glance, his eyes full of understanding. "Ready?" he asked, trying to shift the mood.

"Yea," I replied, taking a deep breath, rushing out the door. "Let's get out of here."

As we stepped outside, the cool evening air hit my face, and I felt a mix of relief and lingering embarrassment. Charlie nudged me playfully.

"Don't let it get to you," he said with a grin. "You look great."

I smiled, grateful for his support. "Lets have some fun."

-ˋˏ✄┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈┈ +

"Pick up at 10, okay?" Mr. Spring said, glancing back at us in the rearview mirror.

I nodded absentmindedly, my attention drawn to the enormous house outside. The place was massive had Harry really rented out an entire hotel? Just how rich was he?

Charlie’s voice broke through my thoughts. "Can't it be 11?" he pleaded, looking at his dad hopefully.

"No, 10 is late enough," Mr. Spring replied firmly.

Charlie sighed, looking defeated as he got out of the car. "Fine," he muttered.

I quickly followed suit, turning back to say goodbye to Mr. Spring. "Thanks for the ride!"

"Have fun, you two!" he called after us as we stepped into the cool evening.

The smell of cheap perfume and artificial vape flavors filled my nose. There was a long line of people, and everywhere I looked, girls were squeezed into tight dresses, their faces caked with makeup. I started to wonder if we were at the right party. Thank God Charlie helped me pick out my outfit, or I would have stood out like a sore thumb.

Charlie nudged me with a grin. "I could have used your help back there, you know?"

I shot him a flabbergasted look. "You're crazy if you think I was going to argue with your dad."

Charlie laughed, shaking his head. "Fair enough. But you owe me one."

I rolled my eyes playfully. "Yeah, yeah. Let's just get inside before I change my mind."

We joined the line, inching our way forward as the music thumped louder with every step. The hotel loomed above us, lights flashing from every window, just from taking a peek inside I can definitely tell that Harry went all out.

We stepped inside, the noise and lights hitting us full force. People were everywhere, dancing, laughing, and shouting to be heard over the music. I didn't know which way to look; it was so crowded. Charlie grabbed the hem of my top so he wouldn't get lost in the crowd. My palms were starting to sweat.

The sheer volume of people and the pulsing music made my head spin. Charlie leaned close to my ear, his voice barely audible over the noise. "Let'd find somewhere quiet I can barely hear myself think."

I nodded, my heart pounding feeling the bass within my body. We pushed through the throng of people, dodging couples and groups of friends. Every corner seemed to hold a new spectacle: a group of girls taking selfies, a guy attempting an impressive but ultimately disastrous dance move. The flashing lights made my head feel fuzzy.

I was already overstimluted and I haven't been here for five minutes. "Do you want to get a drink?"

He nodded in agreement. "Good idea. I swear, did Harry invite the whole city?" Charlie looked frazzled; it seemed he wasn't doing any better than me.

We walked down a quieter hallway, only a few people milling about. "You stay here; I'll go get the drinks," Charlie said, glancing back at me with a smile.

I nodded gratefully, leaning against the wall to catch my breath, trying to ignore the overpowering smell of smoke and alcohol that filled my nose. Charlie disappeared into the crowd, and I took a moment to collect myself, looking at myself in the mirror. My curls seemed to be frizzing up from the humidity, and I quickly ran my fingers through them, trying to tame the wild strands.

Nearby, a table was filled with enough snacks and drinks to feed an army. I made my way over, deciding a quick bite might help settle my nerves. Mother would actually kill me if she saw me eating this stuff.

I grabbed a handful of chips and popped them into my mouth, the salty crunch grounding me a bit. I picked up a cup of the red liquid and took a gulp, but quickly grimaced at the terrible aftertaste.

Looking around the room, trying not to get knocked down by stumbling people who had clearly had enough to drink, I spotted a familiar face in the crowd. I could feel the heat rising in my face as I realized it was Nick.

Spotting me instantly, a look of relief filled his face. He started making his way through the crowd. "I have been looking for you!" we said in unison.

Even in the chaos of the party, I couldn’t help but notice how good he looked. His hair was perfectly tousled, and his smile lit up his eyes, making my heart skip a beat. He had this way of making me feel like I was the only person in the room. I could feel the heat rising in my cheeks. No matter how overwhelming things got, just seeing him made everything easier.

Nick and I exchanged a warm smile, “How about we go grab a drink?” he suggested, his voice soft but somehow cutting through the noise.

“Yeah, that sounds good,” I agreed, feeling a little more at ease with him by my side.

We made our way through the crowded room, and every time someone bumped into me, Nick would gently place his hand on my back, guiding me forward. It was such a small gesture, but I couldn’t ignore the tingling sensation it left behind.

Finally, we reached the drinks table, a mix of colorful concoctions laid out before us. Nick picked up a couple of cups, handing one to me with a playful grin. “I think this one’s safe,” he said, making me think back to that horrid red liquid from earlier.

I laughed, taking the cup from him. “Let’s hope so. I had one earlier, and I swear I thought it was roofied.”

He immediately looked concerned. "Sorry about that. I forgot how some of Harry's parties can get kind of crazy. I was even debating whether to come," he admitted, staring down at the red cup like it was the bane of his existence.

"It's alright, really," I reassured him. "It’s good to hang out with your friends."

Nick shrugged, a small, honest smile tugging at his lips. "Ehh, they're not my 'friends friends.' It's a lot more fun hanging out with you."

I tried not to let my surprise show, but his words caught me off guard. The idea that he’d rather spend time with me than his usual Rugby buddies made my heart flutter. “Really?” I asked, trying to keep my tone casual, though I could feel my face warming.

“Yeah, really,” he said, meeting my eyes with a sincerity that made my chest tighten. “I always have more fun when you’re around. Those guys are great, but they’re not...” he was trying to find the words

“Fun?” I offered with a teasing smile.

Nick’s eyes trailed off, lingering on mine for a moment longer before he nodded slowly. “Well, there’s never really a dull moment with you,” he said with a mischievous grin, “so I tend to keep you close. You know, just in case things get too boring I need someone to liven things up.”

I laughed, shaking my head. “So, I’m your emergency backup for fun?”

“Exactly,” he said, nodding with exaggerated seriousness. “In case this party sucks, I know who just to call .”

I playfully nudged him. “And here I thought you just enjoyed my company.”

“I do,” he said, leaning in slightly with a playful grin. “I just need someone to keep me entertained”

I laughed, shaking my head. “Well, I’m flattered to be your go-to for fun. I have to say, your backup plan is working pretty well tonight.”

Nick grinned, shaking his head. “I’m just glad that your here, I swear I barely know anyone here"

Trying to play it cool, even though I was secretly thrilled that Nick was happy to see me, we made our way to a quieter corner of the party. We found a spot away from everything, where we could actually sit and talk without having to shout over the music.

"You know," Nick started with a grin, "I’ve been forcing my mum to play Mario Kart ever since you absolutely destroyed me at that game. Thought I might finally get a win somewhere."

I burst out laughing, nearly spilling my drink. "You’re practicing with your mom? That’s dedication! Even for you?"

"I'm being serious," Nick replied, his tone earnest. "I’ve never seen anyone play that good. You completely embrassed me"

I grinned, feeling a bit of pride. "Well, I’m glad I could leave such an impression. Guess all those hours of practice paid off."

Nick shook his head, still looking amazed. "You don’t understand. I’ve never been so thoroughly beaten at anything in my life. It was like you had cheat codes or something."

"Just pure skill," I teased, giving him a playful nudge. "Maybe next time I’ll teach you how to win," I teased, then quickly realized it sounded more flirtatious than I intended.

"I—"

Before he could finish, someone called out, “Nick!” From the number of times I’d heard that voice at practice, I could almost smell the narcissism dripping from it. Nick’s expression shifted to mild annoyance as he glanced over his shoulder.

“All right, mate,” Nick said, eyeing Harry up and down with a look of uneasy tolerance. Despite the size of the place, it seemed Harry’s presence was as unavoidable as ever.

“Why are you hanging out here? Bit boring, innit?” Harry asked, his gaze directly fixed on me. The group behind him exchanged knowing glances, their eyes lingering on me with an air of smugness. I shot him a withering glare, not liking where this was going.

Nick shot me a worried look, trying to diffuse the tension. “We just are”

Harry smirked, flopping down on the couch next to Nick and draping an arm around him as if marking his territory. “I’ve got important news for you,” he announced with exaggerated enthusiasm.

“Yeah, what?” Nick asked, clearly uninterested but trying to play along.

"Tara Jones is here" he annoucned gaining the ooos from the boys. My breath hitched, and a sinking feeling settled in my stomach. I knew coming here might have been a mistake.

Nick’s expression turned to confusion. “So, what?”

Harry looked around as if he couldn’t believe on what he was hearing. “This is your big second chance, mate. Let’s make it happen,” he said with a chuckle, Harry looking over at me "They kissed when they were thirteen. Proper romantic" egging on crowd. He says it like I have been dying to know but all I want to do right now is disapear.

“He should go for it, right?” Harry asked, his words dripping with smugness as he pretended to care about my opinion. I could see the tension building in Nick, his discomfort almost palpable. My own irritation was rising fast, and I was seconds away from telling Harry to back off, because if there’s one thing I can’t stand, it’s seeing Nick put on the spot like this.

"Come on, mate," Harry urged, tugging at Nick's arm to pull him up from the couch.

"Harry—" Nick started, his voice laced with protest.

"Come on. She’s just down the corridor,” Harry insisted, ignoring Nick’s reluctance.

Nick hesitated, clearly uncomfortable. "I haven't talked to her in years."

"So? She's super hot, man," Harry insisted, not letting up.

Nick barely had time to respond before Harry turned toward the crowd, calling out, "All right, ladies!" His voice carried through the room, gathering curious glances.

My stomach twisted as Harry’s words sliced through the noise, “Hey, Tara! I've got someone who wants to see you!” I glanced over, and there she was stunning in a way that made it hard to look away. My chest tightened as her eyes locked onto Nick, her smile effortlessly brightening the room. I could feel my heart sinking, a wave of insecurity washing over me. Tara wasn’t just beautiful; she was the kind of beautiful that made me question what I was even doing here.

The music drowned out their voices, but I could still see the way Tara’s eyes lit up as Nick talked to her. A tight knot formed in my chest as I watched, feeling like an outsider in a scene I didn’t belong in.

I’m so pathetic, I thought, standing here, just watching.

I slipped away, disappearing down the corridor, hoping to lose myself in the crowd and escape the sinking feeling in my gut. As I tried to shake off the unease, someone stepped in front of me.

“Hey, you wouldn’t happen to know where Charlie Spring is, would you?”

I glanced up, recognizing the boy but struggling to place his name. “No, actually, I’ve been looking for him too,” I admitted. After a beat, I added, “And you’re…?”

He smiled, looking a bit bashful. “Ben. We met a while back when you were trying to find the film club.”

It clicked, and I nodded, a small smile creeping onto my face. “Oh, right! I remember now. I can’t believe you still remember me,” I said, laughing a bit, though I couldn’t help but feel a bit flustered.

He chuckled softly, “You’re pretty hard to forget…” There was something in his tone that made the words linger, and I found myself blushing slightly.

A warm flush spread up my neck, I honestly had no idea how to respond to that, so I just offered a shy smile. My mind racing for something to say.

Ben’s smile widened, his eyes crinkling at the corners. “So, what are you doing hiding out back here? The party too wild for you?”

I shrugged, glancing back toward the crowd where Nick was still talking to Tara. “Yeah, something like that,” I mumbled. “Just needed a break from all the noise.”

Ben followed my gaze, his expression turning a bit more serious. “Ah, I see. Sometimes these things can be a bit... much.”

I appreciated his attempt to empathize, even if he didn’t know the half of it. “Yeah,” I agreed, nodding. “It’s just one of those nights, I guess.”

Ben seemed to sense my discomfort and shifted the conversation. “Well, if you ever need to disappear for a while, you can always come hang out with me. I’m more of a ‘quiet corner’ kind of guy myself.”

I smiled at that, feeling a little less alone. “Thanks, Ben. I might just take you up on that.”

Catching something in the corner of his eye, he gives me a fleeting smile and then quietly excuses himself. “I’ll catch you later,” he says, before slipping away, leaving me by myself…again.

Finding a lone couch off to the side, I flopped down onto it, feeling like I might as well get a goddamn trophy for being the lamest person in the room. I pulled out my phone, scrolling through notifications that didn’t interest me, my eyes glazing over texts from friends from back home and ignoring the persistent messages from my mother. Only an hour left before Charlie's dad picks us up. Time seemed to crawl, each minute stretching into an eternity.

I sighed, sinking deeper into the cushions, trying to disappear into the background.

"Hi," a familiar voice cut through the noise. I looked up to see Nick standing in front of me, his hands shoved awkwardly into his pockets. He offered a small, hesitant smile, as if unsure of whether he was welcome.

“Hey,” I replied, sitting up a bit straighter, surprised he’d sought me out again.

"You left."

"Sorry, I was just... starting to feel out of place. The guys can be somewhat intimidating," I admitted, my voice trailing off as I glanced at the crowd. It was a bit of the truth, but it didn’t fully capture how overwhelmed I felt.. Not like I am going to tell him that I have a crush on him, that would certainly make matter worse.

He shook his head, a subtle furrow creasing his brow. "Don’t be sorry," he said firmly, his tone edged with genuine concern. "Half of them are just... dickheads. I’m tired of being around them. I'd much rather hang out with you." His words were sincere, his gaze steady.

This was the second time I heard him say that, and I couldn't stop the smile that spread across my face. But as the reality of his words sank in, a flicker of fear ran through me this was real, and that scared me.

I turned my gaze, my smile slipping as my heart raced. What if I was misreading this? What if he was just being nice? My thoughts tangled, and the crowd seemed to close in on me, the noise growing louder and more intense.

Just as I felt myself sinking, Nick reached out and took my hand. The warmth of his touch was immediate, grounding me in the present. His thumb gently brushed against the back of my hand, and I looked up to find his eyes still on me.

"Shall we go somewhere quieter?" he asked, his voice soft yet firm, offering me an escape.

I hesitated for a moment, my mind still reeling, but the gentle pressure of his hand, the way his fingers intertwined with mine, made the decision for me. I nodded, feeling a wave of relief wash over me as I let him lead the way.

As we moved away from the noise, the tension in my chest began to ease. Nick glanced back at me with a playful smile, a glint of mischief in his eyes.

"You want to race?" he teased, the challenge evident in his voice.

I couldn’t help but grin back at him. "You want to race me?" I repeated, already taking a quick step forward to get a head start, my laughter bubbling up as I broke into a run.

"Come on!" I called out over my shoulder, the thrill of the chase energizing my every step.

"Wait, stop!" he shouted, his voice tinged with both surprise and amusement as he sprinted after me, his footsteps echoing up the stairs.

"Unfair, you got a head start," he called out, his mock outrage only making me laugh harder.

"I'm dying!" Nick shouted, his voice breathless yet filled with laughter. I couldn’t believe it the star of the rugby team, gasping and trailing behind me in a race. The thought sent another burst of giggles through me as I glanced back to see him trying to catch up, his grin just as wide as mine.

"Am I hearing an old man complaining?" I teased, slowing down just a bit, but not enough to let him close the gap completely. The sight of Nick, usually so composed and confident, now playfully struggling to keep up, was a rare and delightful reversal that made me wish that we could run just a little while longer.

As we finally reached the top of the stairs, our breath still catching, pushing open the doors

We stepped inside, and I felt my breath catch again, but this time for an entirely different reason.

The grand ballroom before us was stunning. The ceiling reached up high, covered with detailed paintings, their colors bright even in the soft light of the chandeliers that looked like stars. The walls were lined with tall mirrors in fancy frames, reflecting the golden light and making the room feel even bigger.

Nick let out a low whistle, clearly as awestruck as I was. "Wow," he breathed, his voice echoing slightly in the vast space.

Nick shaking his head in disbelief. "Jesus, I knew Harry was rich, but this hotel must have cost him a fuck ton of money," he muttered, his tone a mix of awe and amusement.

I couldn’t help but laugh, the sound echoing softly in the grand room. "No kidding," I replied, glancing around at the opulence surrounding us. "I feel like this place matches his ego big and obnoxious."

Nick snorted, his eyes twinkling with amusement. "Yeah, it’s like he’s trying to outdo himself every time. Next thing you know, he’ll be renting out the Eiffel Tower"

I grinned, imagining the absurdity of it. I found a spot against the wall and sank down, admiring the shimmering lights and grandeur of the room. Nick settled beside me, his gaze following mine, but my thoughts were stuck on that moment from earlier. The way he looked at me, the way he said he’d rather hang out with me I couldn’t shake it. It felt like I was becoming delusional, this constant flutter of hope mixed with doubt. I just needed to know, one way or another, so I could either put this silly crush to rest.

"So..." I started, trying to sound casual, but the slight tremor in my voice betrayed me. "Was Harry being serious? Do you like Tara?"

The words felt heavy as they left my mouth, like they were dragging something deeper out into the open. I didn’t know if I was ready to hear the answer, but I had to ask.

Nick's eyes practically bulged out of their sockets. "What? No! No, definitely not," he blurted out, his voice rising in pitch with each word. The intensity of his reaction caught me off guard, making me question why I’d ever worried in the first place.

There was an awkward silence that hung in the air, thick and heavy. I fidgeted with my hands, suddenly hyper-aware of the tension between us.

"Uh… So… you don't have a crush on anyone at the moment?" I asked, trying to keep my tone casual, though my heart was pounding in my chest. I forced myself to meet his gaze, hoping to find some clue in his expression.

He looked away from my gaze, his eyes shifting to the glimmering chandeliers above us. "Well, I didn't say that," he murmured, a hint of something unspoken lingering in his voice.

"Oh," I managed to say, though the disappointment in my voice was unmistakable. It felt as if the air had thickened, the silence resuming its heavy presence as if it had never left. The excitement and playfulness from earlier faded, leaving behind a quietness that neither of us seemed to know how to break.

I broke the quiet first, curiosity tinged with a hint of nervousness. “So, what’s she like, then?”

Nick’s eyes flickered up to meet mine, a trace of uncertainty shadowing his face. “You’re just going to assume they’re a ‘she’?”

“Oh,” I said, my voice softening with realization. “Are they… are they not a girl?”

He hesitated, his gaze drifting to the elegant patterns on the floor. “Um…”

I leaned in slightly, trying to read his expression. “Would you go out with someone who wasn’t a girl?”

Nick’s lips twisted into a thoughtful frown. “I don’t know. Maybe.”

I pressed on gently, my heart pounding. “Would you kiss someone who wasn’t a girl?”

He met my eyes again, his expression a mix of confusion and vulnerability. “I think… I think I might. But I’m not entirely sure yet.”

I nodded in understanding, my mind processing Nick's words. I was genuinely touched that he trusted me enough to share this, but the relief I expected didn’t quite come. Instead, a mix of embrassement and lingering dread churned inside me. The fear of complicating things or making him uncomfortable gnawed at me, my feelings for him never leaving.

“But I wouldn’t mind going out with a girl,” he said, his voice steady but revealing a hint of uncertainty. My head snapped up, meeting his eyes.

He continued, “I wouldn’t mind kissing a girl either.” His eyes searched mine, looking for a reaction. I didn’t know what to say. I turned to him, the question on the tip of my tongue, but the words wouldn’t come out.

His hand was so close to mine, just an inch apart; I could practically feel his warmth. The proximity made it hard to think straight, each moment stretching longer as I struggled to keep my composure. Our fingers were touching, and neither of us pulled away.

Nick glanced down at our intertwined fingers, his gaze lingering on them. He swallowed hard, his nervousness palpable. I took a deep breath, gathering my courage, and finally asked,

“Would you kiss me?”

Nick leaned in closer, tightening his hold on my hand. His voice was soft but steady. “Yeah,” he said, his eyes locked onto mine.

The distance between us shrinking until it was almost nothing. His lips hovered near mine, and I could feel his breath, warm and soft, tickling my skin. My heart raced, a wild, fluttery feeling in my chest as I waited, anticipation buzzing in the air around us.

His lips met mine in a sweet, delicate kiss that sent a rush of warmth through me. It was soft and tentative, like he was savoring every second. My senses where filled with his signature scent, the one that I have missed so much. The familiarity of it made my heart ache in the best way, and I found myself melting into the kiss, wanting to hold onto this moment forever.

Pulling away slowing we looked away from each other, I could hardly believe it Nick Nelson had just kissed me. I’d just had my first kiss… and I liked it.

Really liked it

I glanced over at him, my heart still racing, but he was already looking at me, his eyes soft and searching, as if he was trying to gauge my reaction. The realization that this moment was real, that it had actually happened, made my heart swell with something indescribable.

Without thinking, I reached out, my hand finding the back of his neck, and pulled him closer. I kissed him deeply, pouring everything I was feeling into that moment. He responded by pulling me in tighter, his arms wrapping around me as if he didn’t want to let go, the intensity of the kiss growing with every second. It was as if all the emotions we had been holding back finally found their release in that one, perfect moment.

I could hardly breathe when we finally pulled apart. Staring at him, I just couldn't look away.

"Are you okay?" I asked softly, my voice barely above a whisper.

"1..." he began to say, but was cut off by the sound of Harry's voice echoing down the hallway.

"Nick, are you here?" Harry called out, his voice drawing closer. Nick's body tensed instantly, the warmth between us replaced by a sudden rush of panic.

"I just want to talk, mate," Harry's voice came closer, more insistent.

Nick pulled away immediately, standing up with a look of sheer panic. He glanced anxiously at the door, his body flinching at each echo of footsteps in the hallway.

"Why are you hiding?!" Harry's voice called out, growing louder and more frustrated.

Nick's gaze was locked on the door, his anxiety clear. Without a word, he took a final, fleeting glance at me an expression of regret or maybe apology flitting across his face. Then, he bolted out, disappearing through the door just as Harry's footsteps grew closer.

The sudden silence that followed was deafening. I sat there, trying to process what had just happened. The kiss had been amazing, but now it felt like a distant, shattered dream.

I felt confused, the warmth of the kiss now gone. My mind was filled with unanswered questions and a sudden ache. It felt like the ground had moved under me, leaving me with just the memory of his touch.

As I tried to steady my breath, my phone vibrated in my pocket. Glancing at the screen, I saw multiple messages from Charlie asking where I was and letting me know that his dad had arrived.

Banging my head gently against the wall, I couldn’t believe how quickly the night had gone from one of the most memorable to one of the worst.

Part 7 Link Here: https://www.tumblr.com/cutecurly-hair/763787688625192960/hearts-unleashed-part-7?source=share

[chaoticbardlady99]

Yesterday I Felt like Dancing (Astarion x GN! Reader)

Synopsis: You have burnt both ends of the candle and haven’t been taking care of your mental health. Unable to get yourself out of bed, Astarion begins to worry about you…

Author note- I have been hardcore struggling with my mental health lately and writing my silly little fics has been the only thing pulling me along. I thought it might be therapeutic to write about my current feelings (I have ADHD, MDD, and GAD so it’s a party up in here). I hope you enjoy!

CW- Suicidal Ideation, symptoms of depression, brief outburst, mentions of mental health diagnosis and poor medical advice.

Title inspired by song “Into the Walls” by Griff.

*not my pic, could not tell you where I found it so I apologize in advance. If you think it might be your picture, please message me so I can give proper credit.

Your last day before backtracking from the Mountain Pass to the Goblin camp is a difficult one.

Not for the group as a whole- just you specifically.

Days before a Mindflayer kidnapped you, a healer back home had told you your brain was sick. You had been devastated- resigned to your miserable fate.

You had been struggling for years at that point with inconsistent motivation, exhaustion, nightmares, and irrational thoughts for months. You have been functional for the most part, but then an overpowering wave will hit you like Warhammer in the ribs and you are rendered useless until it passes.

The healer suggested sunlight, exercise, eating healthy, and spending time with friends to help your affliction when you hit rock bottom. You were wildly unimpressed with her. At the time, you preferred to self isolate so you stayed by yourself in the woods trying to find peace there. You would have to let her know that her “going out and enjoying the sun” message is not always wise- you may get a tadpole shoved in your head. You can’t be that mad though- the tadpole helped bring your pep back.

Anyway, you have been doing all of that for weeks now, you even felt great, but today? You could not have hit rock bottom harder even if you tried.

You woke up that morning unable to get yourself out of bed. It was a rest day so it wasn’t a big deal, but you also know that your companions are going to have things they need to talk to you about and favors they need you to take care of.

Gods you had tried to get up. You are grateful that your past self had the gumption to wash off and change into clean clothes last night, but your armor is still disgustingly sitting outside your tent and your hair is long and wild. You had wanted to braid it, but it all felt like too much work.

Everything feels like too much work right now- even staying awake- so you drift in and out of uncomfortable naps throughout the morning. No matter how many times you fall asleep, begging for relief from the painful brick wall sitting on your brain, it never leaves.

You can feel the midday breeze rustle your tent. You’ve been laying here for hours now. You are crying and you honestly aren’t sure why. You feel completely paralyzed by all the things you need to do to be ready for the Underdark.

You need to clean your armor, go over the Goblin Camp’s map with Wyll, find Gale a magical artifact, and probably comfort Lae’zel since she’s been branded a heretic- but you won’t. The shame and self loathing continues. You are a silly, worthless little human being.

Every person who knocks on your tent gets a simple, “I’m just not feeling well,” and then they walk away. You don’t know why it makes you more sad than appreciative. If you were in their shoes- you would be bending over backwards to make sure they had everything they needed and you wouldn’t let them feel alone. Then you resent yourself for feeling that way towards your companions- they don’t owe you anything and you were the one who chose to help them- you didn’t ask for anything in return. This is all your fault.

The only person who hadn’t come to visit you was Astarion- which hurt your heart just a little, enough that the numbness coursing thickly through your body wavered for a moment. You are quite smitten and he is obviously not. Another mistake to add to the swirling black hole your mind has fallen into.

You knew it was stupid to want his comfort and affections- you had merely slept together a little less than a week ago. Astarion has been quasi avoiding you ever since and when he does talk to you- he’s awkward. You constantly look for flying pigs- Astarion feeling awkward or being awkward is unheard of.

You have come to accept that you were just some tryst and obviously he hadn’t enjoyed it as much as he said he did.

Astarion isn’t to blame and the situation itself certainly didn’t contribute to the sudden lack of emotions. You knew that you were on the verge of a mental collapse sooner rather than later, but you had foolishly hoped you wouldn’t be alone through it. It feels less all consuming when you try to find a reason. It’s more comfortable to know than it is to give up and say, “my brain is fucked and there isn’t a damn thing I can do so I guess I’m stuck here.”

You are jolted out of your thoughts by another knock on your tent.

“I’m sick,” you say flatly.

“Ha- you act like that will deter me. I can’t even get sick, Darling.”

Before you even have time to register that Astarion is on the other side of your tent- he pushes his way through the flaps and stares down at you in confusion. And… concern?

Astarion steps inside and kneels down next to you- scanning you for evidence of illness or injury.

“I suppose I had been worried for nothing,” he smiles sweetly at you, “you are totally fine. Come on Darling, you have to get up and eat. Wyll is fumbling with that map.”

You look at him and begin to cry. Astarion’s face lights up with alarm.

“What- what did I do!?”

“Please don’t make me,” you sob, “I just want a break. I’m so tired. I want to lay in this bed forever and never leave, but there is so much to do and it’s paralyzing.”

You continue to cry and you cover yourself with the extra blanket- successfully hiding your face.

“Go away,” you whisper, “I need to be left alone.”

You say it, but you are far from meaning it. You want him to stay- to hold you- but he doesn’t want you so it will only make everything hurt worse once the numbness fades away.

You wait for several moments and then you hear him leave. Your silent cry turns into choked sobs and your body is shaking from the pain you are in. The numbness hurts. The numbness tells you that you shouldn’t be alive.

Maybe you shouldn’t be.

Everyone here would be able to figure it out on their own (eventually) and you would finally be free. Free of your uncomfortable brain, free of your ugly body- free of the expectations of others. You would no longer be holding them back like you are today- like you will again in the future.

You are sure they would temporarily grieve you, but that was the deal with this whole journey. You had all accepted that one of you or all of you could die at any moment. You will just put them in more danger by being here…

You shake the thought from your head, violently- your head is pounding from the growing tension headache and dehydration. The tears eventually stop and you just… well, lay in bed again. You stare blankly at a book over in the corner. You keep trying to convince yourself to get up and read the damn thing- do literally ANYTHING else than just stay here in your bedroll.

Instead, you fall asleep.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

You wake up to someone knocking on your tent post. You grumble incoherently, covering your head and you hear your unexpected guest sit down next to you. The smell of food fills the tent and your stomach grumbles.

“You need to eat, my Dear,” Astarion says softly.

You are stunned to hear his voice grace your ears. You slowly pull the blanket down to just below your eyes and look at him. Astarion looks distressed, like he doesn’t want to be here. Why would he? You’re a nuisance.

You sit up gingerly and grab the bowl from him. You manage to give him a lopsided smile.

“Thanks. You don’t need to stay, I will be fine on my own,” you say apathetically, staring into the broth.

“I want to stay,” he says, “if you’ll have me.”

The expression on his face is unreadable, but he seems genuine. You nod, your lips pressed together tightly. You eat as much as you feel like while Astarion studies you.

Usually your anxiety is at an all time high (in maybe one of the better ways) when you are around Astarion- he gives you butterflies, butterflies, and even more butterflies. Usually your heart is racing in his presence, but right now you just feel empty.

“Where is your hairbrush?” Astarion asks.

You frown with confusion, “it’s in my bag, why?”

Astarion gets up and goes over to the bag- digging out a few items. He pulls out a lantern, your hairbrush, and a hair tie. Astarion comes over to you and sits down behind you. You feel him gather up the stray pieces of your hair and get to work.

Astarion runs his fingers through your scalp and your tangled hair- the feeling is soothing and it opens something inside of you. Your body shakes silently with sobs and you feel the worm behind your eyes wiggle as Astarion asks for access. You aren’t sure.

“I want to understand,” Astarion says, “please.”

His voice is so raw and desperate- you swallow thickly before allowing him to explore your current emotional state. The silence in the tent is palpable and you feel tense, uncomfortable even. No one has ever cared for you while you are in this state before.

You feel him continue his hairbrushing after he exits your mind. Astarion leaves soft kisses on your shoulder as he gently pulls apart every knot. It helps- you realize- to feel cared for. The numbness still hurts, you still hurt, but it’s nice to not feel so alone.

After Astarion is done brushing your hair, you feel his delicate fingers begin to intricately braid your hair. You wonder when he learned how to do hair.

“Leon’s daughter, Victoria, used to ask me to braid her hair all the time,” Astarion says in a bittersweet voice as if reading your mind, “I picked it up so that she would stop bugging me about it. She said and I quote, ‘you have the perfect braiding hands!’”

You smile to yourself tenderly, “That’s very kind of you, Star. I am sure she appreciated it as much as I appreciate it now.”

You feel Astarion’s hands falter at your words and you are unsure if you have upset him or not. A pregnant pause occurs before Astarion finally clears his throat and goes back to braiding your hair.

“I’m glad that I can help,” Astarion’s delicate, vulnerable words hang in the air, “I’ve… been worried about you today.”

You feel positively flustered and bad for making him feel that way.

“Oh you don’t need to worry about silly ole me! This happens sometimes” you make your voice chirpier than it needs to be, “This is actually the longest I’ve gone for a long time without this happening. I have theorized that the tadpole might help which is kinda cool- I think?”

You laugh awkwardly- desperate to ease his worry.

“How often does this happen?”

Shit. That was the winning question wasn’t it? Astarion will surely never see you as anything less than broken now.

“I’m not really sure,” your voice comes out in a whisper, “I usually always feel a bit of it all the time, but it’s manageable. I function very well regardless.”

“But this one isn’t manageable and evidently you aren’t functional right now.”

You sigh, “No, it isn’t and no, I’m not.”

“What changed?”

“Nothing,” you say, maybe too harshly, “that’s the part that drives me crazy. Yesterday was incredible- I was on top of the whole world, felt like dancing and screaming from the rooftops, but today!?”

You inhale and hold back the muted scream that wants to fill the air.

“Today,” you hiss, “I don’t even want to deal with any of this shit anymore. I’m so fucking tired. There is too much to fucking do and too many people depending on me. Then everyone gets irritated with me if I ask to push off their problems so I persevere through it despite knowing I’m getting bad again. I’m a giant stinking trash heap that everyone keeps adding more to.”

Astarion finishes braiding your hair and presses your back to his chest, pulling you into him. He puts his arms around your waist and settles his chin and face in between the crook of your neck.

“I just feel like such a nuisance all the time- no matter how hard I push myself to prove I’m not. Sometimes I think everyone would be better off if I just… went away.”

You both sit there quietly. At some point he had taken one of your hands in his and he was tracing shapes into the back of it with his thumb. Your omission still hangs heavily in the air.

“I wouldn’t be better off,” Astarion says hotly, “I’d be stuck with all these weirdos by myself. That would be truly miserable, Darling.”

You shake your head, a half smile on your face.

“And besides- you are not even close to a nuisance,” Astarion states, leaving a kiss on your cheek, “at least you aren’t in constant need of magical objects to eat or blood to drink. Oh and you don’t require a painstaking amount of searching to prevent you from literally burning everyone alive.

“Oh and did I forget to mention, we have not one, but two women who despise each other and follow hateful Goddesses which was a fun choice for whatever sick bastard twisted our fates this way.”

You laugh breathily, closing your eyes and letting the sound defrost some of your insides.

“What I’m saying is- I think you are the least of everyone’s ‘nuisances’, my Darling,” he says, squeezing you tighter to his chest, “despite how little you think of yourself. We ne- no, I want you to stay. I know everyone else would say the same, but I must emphasize that I would be horribly distraught if you disappeared. Hells I’d even pay to have you resurrected.”

You gasp playfully, your voice falling slightly flat, “You? The most frugal man I have ever met would pay 200 gold coins to ‘Strike thy name from the record’?”

Your impression of Withers gets Astarion to genuinely laugh- the sound vibrating in your chest. You lean into him and he guides you back to laying down. Astarion entangles his legs with yours as he holds you tightly- your faces are mere centimeters apart. You love the way Astarion smells- rosemary, bergamot, and brandy. You wish you could be wrapped up in him forever. You are still in pain- everything still hurts and feels too difficult, but right now it feels a little less heavy.

“I would throw bags of Gold Coins at that corpse out of revenge, my Dear,” he teases, “you couldn’t possibly think I would ever let you rest peacefully in your grave- I would be far too angry with you and unhappy without you to let that happen.”

You lay there and despite yourself, you lean forward and leave butterfly kisses along his cheeks with your lashes. Astarion scrunches up his nose reflexively and smiles at you. You plant a sweet, short kiss on his lips.

“Thank you Astarion- for everything.”

You close your eyes as he traces circles along your lower back. Your eyes begin to droop, and you fall asleep.

+++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

When you wake up the next morning- you are disappointed to find that you are all alone in your tent. The heavy numbness is still there and you sigh. At least last night made it more bearable.

You look on the side where Astarion had been sleeping and find a note with a bottle attached to it. You pick it up and begin to read.

Tav,

Astarion had asked me about herbs for some relief regarding mental discomforts. I unfortunately don’t know many, but this is a mixture of St. John’s Wort, Valerian Root, and Ashwagandha. Historically, I know these have been used to alleviate emotional and mental pain.

Astarion didn’t tell me why he was asking, but I deduced it was you pretty quickly when he began shooing everyone away from your tent this morning.

I hope this helps- we are all here if you need us. May Silvanus light your path as you navigate this difficult time.

-Halsin

You sit in your own stunned silence for what feels like hours. Halsin knows and he wants to help? Halsin doesn’t think you are screwed or a nuisance? The man barely even knows you!

You are a bit embarrassed, but you can’t help but laugh at the image of Astarion telling everyone to leave you alone.

You open the bottle and a pleasant, earthy smell fills the tent. You drink the mixture (that definitely does not taste anywhere near as pleasant as it smells) and you do feel a slight bit better. Your apathy feels even more tolerable now. You will have to thank Halsin.

You slowly rise from your tent and look around. Everything is packed up neatly in the corner- your clothes from the previous day are folded nicely and you notice all the holes are sewn up.

You jump when someone enters your tent abruptly- the midday sun warming your skin. You turn around and Astarion is smiling at you, but looks nervous.

“I cleaned off your armor and your weapons,” he says awkwardly, scratching the back of his head, “I also packed up your stuff- as you can see. We have to start leaving unfortunately, but I’ll help you get on your armor like I usually do- I might still need help with mine though, but I can ask someone else if it’s too much for you right now. Lae’zel and Karlach offered to pack up your tent. Wyll and Shadowheart figured out the map- Wyll is going to be our ‘fearless’ leader for the day. Gale has some food for you to snack on while we travel- which you will be eating, by the way.”

Astarion is looking at you with a vulnerable expression on his face. He plays nervously with the gold coin in his hands.

You can hardly believe what you are hearing.

“Did- did you do all this for me?” You say with disbelief.

You never thought Astarion was capable of smiling shyly until he had admitted to you that you had been his first thinking creature- you certainly never thought you’d see him become shy twice in your presence.

“I did and it wasn’t a nuisance so don’t even begin to worry about that,” He walks over to you, gently cradling your face in his hands, “I hope this is all okay.”

You smile- the first genuine feeling of happiness you’ve felt in the last 24 hours gently sparks in your chest as you stare up at him. You get up on your tiptoes and bridge the gap between your lips.

“Thank you Astarion, this is perfect- you are perfect,” you are crying tears of joy, “this is the kindest gesture anyone has ever made for me. So just, thank you.”

“Of course, Darling,” he says smiling in between kisses, “I won’t let you lose to yourself. We’ll get through this together from now on- no more hiding.”

And for once? You actually believe someone.

-if you guys like this, please let me know if you would want a part two written from Astarion’s perspective.

Update- I did the thing you silly geese

https://www.tumblr.com/chaoticbardlady99/735969926279528448/i-took-all-this-love-i-found-and-i-hope-that-its

Tag-list: @spacebarbarianweird @domainoflostsouls

[pastel-charm-14]

dealing with academic burnout

hey lovelies! if you're feeling burnt out with school right now, you're not alone. here are some tips to help you push through and finish strong!! (long post incoming :))

BREAK IT DOWN -

big assignments can feel overwhelming, so break them into smaller, more manageable tasks. instead of "write a 10-page paper," think "write an outline," "research for 1 hour," "write the introduction," and so on. this makes the workload less daunting and helps you make consistent progress. it's also helpful to keep track of those smaller tasks in a list.

BE REALISTIC -

prioritize your tasks and set achievable daily or weekly goals. don't try to do everything at once. make a to-do list every day, and highlight your most important tasks. this helps you stay organized but also it feels really good to check things off your list :) for example, aim to complete two math problems instead of the entire set, or read one chapter instead of the whole book, and see where it goes from there.

TAKE BREAKS -

in order to be productive, you need to rest your mind!! try the pomodoro technique: work for 25 minutes, then take a 5-minute break. after four cycles, take a longer break (15-30 minutes). during your breaks, do something completely different from your study activity. get up, stretch, grab a snack, or go for a quick walk outside. it's refreshing for your mind and body.

STAY ACTIVE -

physical activity helps reduce stress and improve your mood. so you should aim to get at least 30 minutes of exercise a day. this could be a workout, a yoga session, or even just a really fast walk. if you don't have much time, try putting short bursts of activity in throughout your day. for example, do some stretches or a few jumping jacks between pomodoro cycles.

GET SUPPORT -

talk to friends, family, or a counselor if you're feeling overwhelmed. sometimes, just having someone listen can make a huge difference!! if you’re struggling with a particular subject or area, try forming/joining a study group or seeking help from a tutor. working with others can give you new perspectives and helps with loneliness.

HAVE A HEALTHY DIET -

your brain needs proper fuel to function at its best. try to eat balanced meals with fruits, veggies, whole grains, and protein. avoid too much caffeine and sugary snacks, because those can lead to energy crashes. keep a water bottle with you and make sure you're drinking enough throughout the day to keep your energy levels stable.

GET ENOUGH SLEEP -

pulling all-nighters is going to affect your concentration and memory. go for 7-8 hours of sleep each night. get a bedtime routine in place to help signal to your body that it's time to wind down. this could include stuff like reading a book, listening to calming music, or doing some mindfulness exercises. avoid screens at least an hour before bed, because the blue light can interfere with your sleep.

REWARD YOURSELF -

give yourself something to look forward to after completing a task. a favorite snack, watching an episode of your favorite show, or spending some time on social media, really anything that makes you happy. rewards reinforce your positive behavior and make studying feel more manageable. for example, tell yourself, "after I finish this chapter, I'll take a break to watch a funny youtube video."

STAY ORGANIZED -

keep track of deadlines and dates!! it will save you so much stress!! use a planner, calendar app, or bullet journal to log all your assignments and exam dates. you can also color code by subject/priority to make it easier to see what needs attention. review your schedule often and adjust it when you need to.

GIVE YOURSELF SOME LOVE -

it's okay to feel tired and stressed!! be kind to yourself and remember that you're doing your best. if you need to take a break, don't feel guilty about it. self-care is just as important as academic achievement. try some mindfulness or meditation and just take a moment to ground yourself.

hang in there, you've got this! just a little bit more to go and it'll be all worth it in the end. 🫶

[she-is-ovarit]

This is for all the younger gen Z women, particularly those of you within the ages of 17 to roughly 23. This is written from an American perspective, things might be a little different depending on where you're from.

I graduated high school with the unconscious assumption that certain systems will take care of me. The medical system would educate me on proper nutrition and health issues was probably my largest underlying assumption, but really I just had trust in institutions generally.

This isn't true. You are responsible for learning. As an example, I have been vegetarian since age 14. Nobody talked to me about proper nutrition, they just told me I needed to eat more protein.

I lived a decade of my life having shortness of breath, sleeping issues, clumsiness, cold hands and feet, having brain fog, extreme fatigue, heightened anxiety, etc. My period was extremely light and brown, it'd last for about 2 or so days. I'd go and talk about these problems, and telling doctors that I was vegetarian was one of the first things that came out of my mouth just with any visit because I knew at least that piece was important to communicate.

There was really no action taken over the span of about 10 years. I was told the period thing was normal, that changes for women. A sleep specialist let me know that feeling exhausted was also normal. The brain fog was probably due to anxiety. Here, try allergy medication (tbh that did help for other reasons). Then one day I just asked them to check my vitamin and mineral levels. Prior to this I didn't think you can make requests to doctors, I thought you showed up and they performed tests on what they recommended. With some reluctance from my primary care physician and some compromise because she said my insurance wouldn't cover testing things like B12 levels (I later found out from a nurse that, they would, she would have just needed to fill out extra paperwork), she did some tests.

I found out both my iron and D3 levels were low. What else could be?

I later learned pretty much all the vitamins common to be low for vegetarians were low. D3, magnesium, vitamin Bs, iron, and healthy fats. Bought some liquid vitamins (because the body only absorbs 10% of the pill supplements), began eating an avocado a day, my period became normal for the first time in nine years, and I am able to function.

Another example of how human systems won't educate you: I don't have feeling in some of my toes due to wearing incorrect sized footwear for years resulting in permanent nerve damage. I'm size 11.5 in women's, and I was relying on someone to tell me how proper footwear worked, because surely the guy in the minimum wage position working the footwear section would know.

Don't trust human systems to guide you through how certain things work. Seek specific specialists and experts when you can, and inform yourself on your own. Don't blindly trust search engines like Google, it's not like how it used to be when I was growing up and many millennial adults will tell you to "just google things" because we're used to finding actual substantive answers when we do. However, now, usually whoever pays is who makes the first page or two of search engines, it has nothing to do with what information is "most correct". Don't be afraid to request certain tests be done by doctors or certain referrals made to different specialists.

Edit: And also, I've found general practitioners are terrible when you walk in and tell them about several different symptoms at one time. They're more used to treating one symptom at a time, and they treat the symptom not the root cause. If you go in with a runny nose, general practitioners are going to throw medications at you to try and treat the runny nose, not look deeper into what's causing the runny nose. It's equivalent to if you're in a boat and it's sinking, they're bailing out water without actually fixing the hole or trying to figure out where it is, with the exception of emergency situations and even then it depends.

[genderqueerdykes]

Do you have any tips for cooking @ home? I'm trying to eat a more healthy diet but cooking at home is one of the bigger hurdles for myself to handle, especially since I've never been taught how to cook and I worry about wasting food.

Maybe ARFID isn't really the right word since I'm not diagnosed anyway, but 90% of the time I prefer crunchy things, but when it's something like a vegetable I can't really handle the taste and I'm not sure how to cook them in ways that they keep their crunch.

i like this question a lot!

i've had to adjust my diet bit by bit over the past 2 years due to my digestive issues. i've had to learn how to cook a wider variety of things in order to not eat something that will immediately make me sick. people can have aversions to a variety of foods for different reasons, it's alright to take the time to learn what you can and can't eat and work with those things first

depending on your personal tastes, there are ways to lightly steam or even eat that vegetable raw that is more suited to your tastes. i mean it when i say that a good sauce can really make the difference in what you're preparing! sometimes dressings or marinades are needed as well, it's important to consider what you can add to the dish that doesn't require tons of prep, or even for the items to be cooked

there are certain vegetables i really can't stand raw, carrots being one of them. they're too sweet. on the other hand there are vegetables i prefer raw like broccoli. certain vegetables lose certain nutritional values such as their fiber content breaking down during the cooking process, and so on. if there are certain veggies that you can safely consume raw that's not necessarily an issue

what i'd say is work with staples that you know you can eat and add new things from there. you can literally start with just rice, pasta, bread, soups, whatever you know you can for sure eat. i make miso soup at home to ease my stomach pain and help get my body and mind ready to think about food. i struggle with feeling motivated to eat, so i find eating very small amounts of food before a big meal can help you figure out what you want before you get into it

depending on what foods you want to stay crunchy you may be able to find recipes for those specific things and be able to incorporate their texture into your current diet. certain vegetables like water chestnuts and lotus root stay very crunchy after being cooked. it's not impossible to keep some of the texture for certain foods. even if you have to google something like "carrot recipes" or "recipes that use broccoli" you can use that as an idea to work from

i google a lot of my meal ideas to get a better concept on how to prepare it. i look up a few recipes before i start cooking so i can try to gauge what i'm getting myself into, if i have the proper ingredients, if i need to try different recipes, etc. looking up recipes can be fun too because you may discover something new that's easy to make and would suit your tastes better. i'd say if you can be open to recipes from other cultures, there may be dishes that will suit your tastes better that you're not personally familiar with for the time being

i use to think i wasn't a fan of brown rice but i really enjoy it. it has a different texture and flavor profile that i love, it's worth waiting the long cooking time. whenever i have spare money i'd like to get a rice cooker to make it even easier. rice can easily be cooked with some seasonings in the water to make it more flavorful as well! grains, pasta, and breads can be simple meals themselves, too. i find it easy to eat lightly seasoned brown rice & miso soup when i can't think of anything else

cut out foods that aren't working for you slowly too, you don't want to give up things that you currently like because they're not 'healthy' or anything like that. give yourself time to adjust, especially as you learn to cook new things. cooking takes a lot of practice. i don't have a microwave or toaster, i've learned to make everything with my oven and stove and i enjoy it. it lets me customize things and the texture comes out better. being able to personalize your food is really important

i don't eat prepared foods much anymore, i generally get staple ingredients from the food bank and make my own versions. it's easier to weed out foods that are bad for you if you can control what goes into your food. i don't have eggs, so there aren't any eggs hiding in my food. i don't have meat so there's no meat, lard, or other animal products hiding in there, nor dairy, etc. i get vegan cheese and butter alternatives from the food bank as well, so it's getting easier with just using staple ingredients, but learning new recipes and how to prepare them does take time

please let me know if you have more specific questions i'd love to help! this is important to me because people need to be able to eat foods that don't make them feel like shit, or don't taste or feel awful to eat. when we eat the way we interpret taste and texture is very important on gauging whether or not we're eating foods that are right for our bodies or not. it's okay to like crunchy foods. it's been postulated that this is an indicator of low iron. you may also just like them! either way it's good to listen to your body. it's okay if you seek these patterns, it's your diet, your tastes, etc. you're allowed to define what is good for your tastes and your body

take care! good luck, cooking is a skill that's learned slowly over time, i hope things get easier for you soon!

[yourheart-inmyhands]

Hiya! If you don't mind, I would like to request something a little more specific.

How do you think Venti, Lisa and Diluc with reader that's kind of just Has a REALY unhealthy life style? Like they barely ever go outside, mostly staying on their house, have terrible diet consisting of junk food and seeets and a shrimp like posture?

Of course If you don't feel comfortable writing this, you don't have to.

-🐶 Anon

this one's a little shorter than normal cause i wasn't suuuuper sure what to write but i hope you enjoy it anyways :D

Warning: this post contains yandere-themes, including overbearing behaviors, being held against will, delusional behaviors, and other potential topics. Please read at your own risk!

Yandere!Diluc would appreciate that you never go outside, as he prefers you to stay indoors when you aren’t with him, but he refuses to let you live off junk food. He wants his darling healthy and thus, forces you to have three proper meals with him daily, breakfast, lunch, and dinner, no argument allowed. If you want junk foods you can have some as a snack after dinner, but otherwise will not be allowed any. He doesn’t mind much else, he was simply raised on a well diet and believes it’s important for you to be eating proper foods.

Yandere!Venti would make all your meals, it takes him a bit to get used to cooking, but when he does he actually cooks fairly well! He tries to incorporate a lot of the things he’ll think you’ll like, in the sense that if you’re craving one thing, he tries to find a meal that it will pair well with so that you can have it while also eating. He himself doesn’t eat so he doesn’t really understand the difference between junk food and good food, he just assumes that one has more sugar and that’s really it. He does sit there and watch you eat though, and is also a fan of your more inside keeping nature. He will bring you outside with him on occasion though, mostly to the balcony but he thinks sun is good for humans!

Yandere!Lisa is honestly probably the worst for this one as her mothering side kicks in. She cuts all junk food out of your diet, forbidding it from the house entirely. She’ll correct you anytime she sees your posture slipping, insisting that you sit up straight and properly, and she’ll drag you outside for daily walks. She may come off as a dozing, tired woman at work, but at home she runs that house and she will not allow her darling to fall into bad habits whilst she’s around. You can expect her to punish you if she finds you trying to sneak junk foods as well, once she puts her foot down about that there’s no picking it back up.

[loonarmuunar]

Epithet side effect headcanons that somehow turned into disability stuff while I was writing 👍👍 (these are kinda angsty I did not intend for that to happen but uh here we are—)

Molly — sometimes if she overuses her epithet, it can almost “nullify” her mind in a sense, giving her short-term memory problems on occasion. Usually it’s mild and doesn’t have much effect, just normal everyday forgetfulness, but when it’s bad, her head gets really fuzzy and she can’t focus or remember anything, she gets awful migraines and headaches, and she has a sort of feverish mind (y’know like when you’re so sick ur head feels Weird and u can’t Brain right). It’ll go away pretty quickly as long as she rests, but uh. We know she ain’t getting much of that.

It’s really Stressful and frustrating for her, because she KNOWS she forgot something but she can’t remember WHAT in the slightest.

This doesn’t happen very often thankfully since she doesn’t strain her epithet much, it’s like a once-every-few-months kinda thing.

Giovanni — got this one from a fic, Giovanni has a lot of sodium in his blood (cause soup, salty) which gives him wonky blood pressure, and it causes chronic nosebleeds. I like this one a lot cause I used to get nosebleeds on like a weekly, and in the summer, daily basis as a kid.

He got his first nosebleed in late spring when he was about 5 or so, just running around outside. He didn’t notice (and trust me when I say it can be HARD to notice) for a LOOONGGGG time. He ended up losing a LOT of blood. When you get a nosebleed it can sometimes run down into your throat and you’ll start spitting up blood it’s Uncomfortable and Gross. Anyways he went back home, went “hi moms :3 *soaked in blood, choking up blood*” andddd they Freaked Out.

He’s anemic because of it, and has to take iron meds. If he forgets to take them he gets really dizzy, and if it’s particularly bad, he can faint.

Sylvie — Narcolepsy. And insomnia. You can have both (and from what I know, they often go hand-in-hand), and he is Not having a good time.

He’s exhausted during the day, he tries to take stimulants to stay up but they don’t always work. When it’s night, he can’t go to sleep for the life of him, and if he does, he wakes up very often. It’s Not Fun. Sometimes he just gives up, and sleeps all day, then works all night.

Mera — We know the side effects, but I’m gonna mess with it a bit (aka I’m projecting). The muscles around her joints are really weak and frail, meaning it’s looser, so she has Hypermobility. Possibly also Ehlers-Danlos syndrome. She’s got a lot of joint pain on top of her regular pain.

She’s got it b a d, if lifts her arm up too high it’ll jerk and she’ll be like “oh yup. Dislocated again.”

She’s absolutely COVERED in bruises and scars, whenever she has to get stitches it constantly tears. She heals horribly. She’s starting to develop arthritis as well.

Medication usually doesn’t do anything for hypermobility related pain, if you’re lucky it’ll take the edge off. Indus helps her out with heatpads and stuff, but other than that, she just has to tough it out.

Indus — nothing. Have u seen this man?? He probably drinks disgusting high vitamin smoothies every morning, he eats full proper meals, dude is in PEAK CONDITION. If he did have any side effects it would be completely negated by his sheer healthiness. Diseases and conditions fear him.

He is however that One Person who is prepared for Everything and will help u if u need it. He carries medication and heatpads for Mera in case she forgets them, as well as bandaids and antiseptic wipes. He’s just a Good fella… <33

[silverheartlugia2000]

DCXDP prompt

Ok, so there's plenty of Danny laying low or freaking out about the no meta rule, but I have this CRAVING of someone for once just explaining it to him? Like whoever bird or birds he's talking to just leans in and whispers "Wanna know a secret? That's mostly just a mind control precaution. I mean would you want to see Supes jacked up on fear gas? If the league do come over he prefers to be called first so he's close if something happens."   

Danny- "Oh... yeah that makes sense actually, that shit isn't fun to be under.."

"Wait is THAT why you have that string of robberies on your record?!"

"That and the time my whole town got possessed in order to make me look bad and get arrested.."

The bird then drags Danny into the cave to open Bruce's file on him, and they both sit down and fill in the gaps on the shadier spots of his record. Heck Danny eventually gives Bats a few thermoses and other less harmful but still disabling device blueprints to add to the contingency file cause even if Dan is in therapy and on probation he knows his shit luck will probably make it needed sooner rather than later and he knows how fast it will go bad.

It comes in very handy at the next gala when Vlad attempts to have a duplicate overshadow Bruce who refuses to take his business propositions. Vlad gets nosey before Danny pulls up his king rights and makes vlad take an Oath (the magic binding kind) to not mess with Bruce or his family or reveal any of their super identities to anyone at all. Constantine is there beforehand to read over the contract and outthink any loopholes before vlad can take advantage of them.

Danny gives them samples of ecto-dejecto for medical emergencies, the Bat's keep them refreshed and in stock especally after they meet Ellie and hear about her stability problems. With help from Frostbite and Danny's ok they start working on a more reliable formula just for Ellie's sake.

Yes Jason is calmer around the halfas and he is slowly stabilizing enough form a proper core from it, (not an instant fix this time!) whether hes becoming a true halfa, more towards a remnant, or both they arent sure. But one night when the phantoms arent around Jason is having a bad time, reacting from something he was hit with during a fight. Tim just grabs one of the ecto-pens on a whim and it just flushes out the toxin so fast Jay passes out. When he wakes up his core has had a good growth spurt, its still not complete yet but he's beginning to get some minor abilities, the Phantom sibs start coaching him before it gets strong enough for Jason to turn completely intangible and if Jay starts complaining? Clockwork whisks them ALL up to the tower for a home movie night of Danny's greatest fails. Grampa has a collection, good and bad XD. Yes Danny is cringing in shame while eating Clockwork's ecto cookies but Jason is slowly starting to understand the importance of getting the basics right cause he does NOT want to accidentally sink completely under the ground without being able to get back out no thank you!!

What core type would he get anyway? Shadow's like Johnny because of the stealth perks? Earth to prevent being buried again? Would he have literature as a secondary obsession cause obviously he's gonna follow Danny into the family/protection category but since Danny also has a space obsession why not?

He puts Jazz's name in the list of superhero safe therapists, the fact she's already making waves at Arkam is only boosting her reputation. Especially once they read her paper on ghost obsessions and how sometimes they are comparable to hyper-fixations in autistics in the way they both satisfy and promote healthy growth for a ghosts physical and mental state but also how being deprived of them or forced to go against them can be severely harmful to their literal health.

And that was one thing the birds kept tripping on to understand whenever they needed to bench one of the halfas but they would end up just hovering around NEEDING to be helpful no mater how much they are told to go back to bed. They also get a whole new understanding on what happened to Dan cause yeah his whole timeline is based on loosing his family and retaliating out of grief.

So from then on the halfas are allowed to help with little tasks as long as they do not strain their recovery at all. Whenever Danny gets sickly and depressed they take him up to the watch tower, Ellie gets lessons in different languages so she can interact more when they let her join them on international trips, Jason gets set loose in a newly discovered bookstore when the manor's or Bab's library isn't enough, and Dan.. they're still figuring him out but he seems to enjoy wrecking little play city set ups and games where you play as the monster like Godzilla or Rampage along with general ghost sibling rough housing. (Lilo and Stitch is his favorite movie but you'd be hard pressed to get him to admit it,)

As for ships, definitely anger management. Jason becomes an unofficial fourth Phantom sib. Platonic everlasting trio cause Danny loves his friends and they will pet him like a cat for hours while his tail coils around them possessively like a giant snake and still make memes of it when he's grumpy. Brain dead is fun also, especially if Danny or the others are capable of Little Baby Man form and Tim has to fight Damian for cuddle rights! Bats has his usual girls but hey superman isn't that bad to hang around either.

[disciplined-cornfed]

Mantras to live by

Challenge all to say even a section of these daily every day and night and see how they change. Unleash the beast

Im a fucking work horse

I trot along and work.

I love working hard

I trot along and work

I love getting dirty

Sweat is the sign of high work ethic

I work fucking hard

Every fucking day

I love to lift

I live to lift

I make lifting a priority

A number one priority

Lifting brings me joy

Lifting gives me strength

Lifting gives me power

Lifting is my life

I love to lift

I live to lift

Lifting is a passion

I love to do pushups

I love to do crunches

I do pushups everyday

I do crunches everyday

Lifting is a priority

I love eating heatlhy

Eating healthy is right

It makes me feel right

Lifting is right

It makes me feel right

I live to lift daily

I lift daily

I lift daily

I never skip

I always lift

I lift daily

Everyday i lift

I love to lift everyday

Lifting brings me joy

Lifting is my passion

I love the pain i feel when i lift

I love the resistance

Pushing through the resistance is strength

I use proper form

I love to use the proper form

I use the proper form in absolute excellence

I lift and love to do it

The sound of weights brings me joy

The sound of weights brings me peace

When i lift i get in the zone

I push myself to the absolute

I push myself hard when i lift

I lift consistently

Cause i must lift consistent

Lifting consistently is the only path

I lift everyday and i love every moment

Lifting is my life

Lifting is everything

Lift

Lift

Lift

Lifting is my number one priority

I must lift

I love to lift

Studying is a number one priority

I love to learn more about lifting

Learning about lifting provides me more

So i learn more about how to properly engage with lifting

Learning about lifting and fitness is a priority

An absolute priority

I love watching lifters

Watching lifters brings me joy

I love talking to lifters

Cause they keep me focused on the important things

Lifting is a priority

I have a love of combat

Combat sports brings me joy

I love watching combat

Learning from failure breeds success

Watching others fight teaches me knowledge

Fire within lit

Be the workhorse

Be strong

Be better

Everyday

I embrace the daily battles

The daily effort

The daily battle is everything

Absolutely everything

The daily battle is my life

The daily battle is my goal

The daily battle teaches me patience

The daily battle is rewarding

Effort is everything

Im a man of Discipline, of worthiness, and absolute respect

Discipline

Worthiness

Respect

Im a man of excellence who always keeps his word

I exude discipline

I exude worthiness

I exude respect

I will always succeed

Everyday I challenge myself is a day I get better

Challenge is the blood of life

Challnege gives me energy

Challenge is motivating

Keep chiseing away

You’re not finished yet

You are not finished yet

You will never be finished

You can always be better

Every single day

Keep chiseling away

Away with the old

in with the new

Keep going

Push on

Chisel chisel chisel

More

Keep pushing

Keep going

Become unrecognizable

Change every day

Relentless forward progress

Discipline is waking up early

I dress disciplined

I wear gym clothes to the gym

I wear professional casual attire when i go out

I dress like a man

I am a well dressed man

I am structured

And ordered

I am disciplined

My mind is strong capable and disciplined

I am disciplined

I am traditional

I am honorable

I am amazing

I define my life by discipline

I always have a plan cooking in my mind

I do business

I live like a king

I fuck like a king

I make money like a king

I stand my ground and call shit out

Im unshakable in my beliefs

I call out all bullshit.

I am a fucking badass

[mindfulstudyquest]

❥﹒♡﹒☕﹒ 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴𝘀 𝗶 𝘄𝗮𝗻𝘁 𝘁𝗼 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗺𝘆 𝗹𝗶𝗳𝗲 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗻𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲

𝟭. being consistent in journaling ( 🪻 )

i have recently started journaling more consistently and would like to maintain this line. i tried several times to start, failing miserably, because i couldn't find a method that would keep me motivated for a long time. then i purchased the famous five minutes gratitude journal, which is much easier to keep, and which i manage to update almost every day because by simply having to answer the pre-set questions my brain doesn't experience it as a commitment, unlike writing a diary page. alongside the fmj i have another diary with blank pages that i use as a proper diary, writing my reflections, talking about my day, complaining about negative things and stuff like that. i must say that it's therapeutic. i hope this is the right time i can maintain consistency in writing.

𝟮. having a more balanced diet ( 🍋‍🟩 )

i admit i've been eating like shit lately, a lot of sweets and processed foods alternated with periods of fasting due to guilt with the excuse of not having enough time to cook among the thousand things to do. i want to seriously commit to investing some of my time each week into preparing healthy, homemade meals (i could share some recipes here if you want, lmk) that keep me energized and don't ruin my hard work at the gym by adding empty calories to my diet.

𝟯. being consistent in the gym ( 🍄 )

and then obviously going to the gym at least 3 times a week, not really due to a matter of weight/aesthetics, but to cultivate discipline and focus. i believe that physically venting stress is the best and healthiest way to handle the crushing weight of life lately. sometimes i simply need to unload my energy without throwing a fit and risking venting it on someone who has nothing to do with it.

𝟰. reading at least 10 pages per day ( 📚 )

i love reading. i love reading madly, but i also know that i often find a thousand excuses not to do it. my brain fried by social media and zombie scrolling doesn't like the idea of concentrating on printed pages at all and i always put off reading all those books placed on my shelf gathering dust. i haven't read a book in months, so the time has come to break this bad habit and take back my greatest passion. i won't even mention all the benefits of reading, because only one book can give you so much in such a short time.

𝟱. sleep at least 8 hours ( ☕ )

i think my lack of sleep has a psychological component, but i'm no expert so what i say may not actually make any sense. i sleep little, much less than i need, when i was in high school i finished studying very late at night (past 3am) every day because i was so dependent on academic validation that the idea of getting a slightly lower grade than my usual could make me throw up. the thing is, i always delay going to sleep, even though my body is begging me to do so, and i think it's due to an inherent fear that the next day i'll have to go through it all over again. consequently in the morning i'm a wreck and i have to drag myself out of bed, being 30% as productive as i actually could be. i think it's time to work on my sleep schedule much more seriously, i think it could boost my health a lot.

𝟲. spend 15min in the sun every day ( ☀️ )

as a woman i know how important it is to be in the sun to produce vitamin D, unfortunately for me i'm some kind of goblin vampire who can't stay in the sun for more than five minutes without getting sunburned – on top of that my eyes start to water when the light too strong. i'll arm myself with sunscreen and give my body what it needs, hoping i won't get arthritis in my forties.

let me know in the comments what are YOU planning to improve in the near future <3

[aki-shun]

Concubine Of The Red King [M!Reader x Riddle Rosehearts]

This may be the last request I write under my old system. New rules and lists will be arranged in the pinned post.

First This post was created by request.

Requester: @delightfulcupquakequeen

TW: Omegaverse, mpreg, there's a lot of time skips

You had tiring and busy days as Riddle's husband and the other king(?) of the country. Fortunately, Riddle kept you away from matters like politics and heavy management so that you wouldn't have too much trouble, and included you in the palace and some internal affairs that even you could handle.

These duties also include palace soldiers and servants. And these two cute idiots you follow. Ace and Deuce were among the new employees who came to the palace as guards under Cater, one of The Left Wing Guards.

And those two idiots might have made Riddle a little angry. By eating some tart. Oh, the expressions on those two's faces when they appeared in front of Riddle looked so innocent and stupid that you asked your husband to forgive those two.

You go behind the chair where Riddle is sitting and hug him from behind. In return, he kisses your hands and arms around his neck.

Is there something wrong, Riddle? [N] Those two fools drank coffee at afternoon tea time. It's tea time! [R] Ohh, honey, but those two were on night duty last night and had to stay on day duty today too. I'm sure it's to relieve their insomnia. [N]

They could also drink tea, why that dark bitter stuff..! [R] Maybe that's why coffee is said to be good for insomnia. gigles [N]

Hah, you always find something to defend these two. [R]

You've heard of the heat of Omegas or the heat of Alphas, right? For some reason, the nights were very noisy at that time :)

Now let's look at what we have: an out-of-control Riddle, a Trey trying to calm his King down, Cater finding himself in this situation when he comes to pick up his two idiot soldiers, two idiots who are excited to be so-called 'uncles'. Good luck.

No matter how much you like it when your strawberry man is fussing over you, this is only the 4th day of this poor pathetic panic and you're not sure if you can handle it for the whole pregnancy.

Riddle, can you give me back my papers? I can't do my job. [N]

You need to stop doing your work and lie down. If there is one thing you have to do, it is to rest..! [R]

What are you reading? [N] … Political science. Anyway, forget the book. Did you like the tart? Trey's mother made it for you. [R] Of course, his mother's hand is delicious as always. Here, have a slice. [N] No, it's yours and your baby's. [R] Riddle is just a slice. I don't think I could finish a whole tart. [N] No way, that's your- [R] Riddle, my dear, or do you want to upset me? [N] WHA- Just a slice. All the rest is yours. [R] Eat.it.all. [N]

Honey, it's only 3 weeks old. And just a few papers and documents. [N]

But these will tire you..! [R] My dear, nothing like this will happen. [N]

But this book does not say that. Excessive stress can cause premature birth or worse, leave a diseased mark on the baby. [R] Didn't I forbid you those books? [N]

But- [R] Riddle, those books are almost 500 years old. Of course, some of them may be real, but there is a doctor in the palace. If something happens, we call him. [N]

You should be stress free. [R] Your stress is what makes me stressed. [N]

… I'm not stressed.. [R] Yes you are, oh Big Seven. If anyone were to see us, they'd think you're pregnant. Now give me this book- [N]

After 5 months

Riddle prevents you from talking to most people (Ace&Deuce). No, he's not a yandere. He's just trying to stop you from talking to people he thinks will stress you out. As your belly grew so much, his panic also grew. He came up with a name for the baby according to the rules of the Queen of Hearts. Don't think that you can now do the things that you were able to do by forcing him out of your hands at the beginning of your pregnancy. It is strictly prohibited. You need to eat healthy and properly and get healthy air in as peaceful an environment as possible. Also, do not look at fire or anything similar for a long period of time. He read that such things change the baby's physical characteristics. Yes, Riddle is still reading those old books.

You don't know if it's a good thing to use Riddle's fears to get some control, but at least some things are under control.

Riddle's ear is on your belly. He gently caresses your belly with his hands. Hearing and feeling his child's first kicks makes him feel something.

I think he gets a little excited in front of his father.

Just like the baby's kicks, you could hear the excited heartbeat of your husband, who had a face as red as his hair. Riddle relaxes as time passes and the doctor confirms that you and your baby are healthy. Of course, we should not forget Trey's share in this. Cater does this by keeping Ace and Deuce away from Riddle as much as possible. Still, Riddle grew a little tolerant of the pair.

I didn't know that the king could make such a face when he was embarrassed~. [T] Trey..! What are you doing here..! [R] I'm here for King [name]. I brought the things he asked for from the chef. [T] Hmm? What did you want from the chef, dear? [R]

...

...

…

Riddle tried and failed to impose a kitchen ban. Of course, he withdrew this decision after you threw all the books in his library at his head. He loves you, but please, when you crave those things, please crave them in places where he can't see you. He can beg for it.

Are you seriously going to eat that thing? [R] (Name who eats lemon peels with 3 types of chocolate on top plus curry and chili peppers as decoration) Why would I ask the cook for something I won't eat?? [N] .. Doesn't look very healthy [R] Riddle, My Dear, nothing is too healthy. Besides, it's not me, it's the baby who wants this :( [N]

When that thing is born, it will learn from me personally what it needs to eat. [R] You're being rude >:( [N] I am not. [R] … [N] Ughmm I mean- [R] Do you think bell peppers stuffed with peanut butter and cheese and topped with plum marmalade are delicious? [N] …….. I- [R] TREYY I WAN- I MEAN BABY WANTS SOMETHING [N] You won't eat that thing >:( I don't want to lose my precious ones that are and will be. [R]

Of course, there are many difficult parts of pregnancy and some things are difficult for some people that they still can't get over… That's why we're skipping those parts because that's how this AU works :) (while looking at these topics on the internet, just in my mind it was like 'Why do you still want children despite this?!' So thank your mothers or omega fathers for having the courage to give birth to you, or not, I don't know)

*3.27 a.m.

Riddle..riddle.. [N] Wakes up Hah, did something happen?! [R] No, you didn't just say goodnight to me before going to sleep :) [N] Oh I'm sorry, good night my strawberry garden. Yawn [R] My water just broke :) [N] So good night…….WHAT?! [R]

The entire palace was awakened by the sound of Riddle running and screaming. You may have suffered from physical and partly mental problems of pregnancy, but this man suffered not only the mental problems of pregnancy, but also mental problems that were not in the pregnancy mental. These loads are too big for his body 😔

Just the facts, labor was painful. Don't expect anything, but if you keep pulling your husband's hair to ease your pain, your baby will have a bald father when he is born. Instead there's Ace and Deuce, pull theirs, Riddle thought, but then he knew he had to take on that role as a wife here so he didn't mind hanging on and going bald.

This is a girl, your majesty. [Nurse]

Hey, a light from the sky hits Riddle's head, what is this? Ooohh this is a 'Daughter Dad Personality Overload'. This is valid for all fathers. If your father is not one of them, the internet was probably cut off during the installation. Sorry :(

Ohm OHm anyway

This is my daughter.. I have a daughter. [R] Our daughter, we have a daughter. [N] Yes, yes it is. [R] … He looks like a red pepper, just like his father. [A] Ace! You're just insulting his majesty, just say she's little as his father! [D] Who let these two idiots in, they woke up the baby! [R] I think they woke up to your shouting.. [C] Did you say something Cater??! [R] I didn't even open my mouth.. Whatever he said, Trey said. [C] …. Really..? [T] It really looks like red pepper. [N] Dear, you to? :( [R]

And they left. And she came .. 🙄

I see that I am the last one to be informed about the birth of my grandchild. [R.M.]

Mother-in-law.. Good luck.

Riddle give me my grandchild. [R.M.] Uhm okay mom. [R] Your Majesty, do not forget what I used to be. [R.M.] Well..your majesty. [R] Hmm, what's its name? [R.M.] Rose, your majesty. [R] Hah, it's like a villager's name. Her name will be Garnet 6. Elizabeth Riddle Risel Brizar Gisel 5. Mary. [R.M.]

Your majesty, I think your grandson urinated on you. Most likely it means a NO to the name you gave it :) [N]

….

….

….

drip drip drip

As they say, the daughter attracts the father. The baby may apparently be riddle 2.0. But you shot that thing for 9 months. Of course she will look like you.

If you don't like this article, that's not my problem, okay? I was traumatized by the pregnancy video I watched. I need therapy.

And I hate her(the short kings mom)