#and way more insecure
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Text
I'm reading the Cyrano and what a JOY. Literally shaking and giggling and laughing and rereading, and then reading again but out loud making faces and gestures, and then reading again but in French, and then again making more faces and more gestures, and all the while shaking even more
#I should probably delete this later#I talk too much#Cyrano de Bergerac#It's been a long while since I last read something for the first time that I enjoyed this much. I'm having a blast#He is even more adorable than in adaptations and is even more desperately in love#and way more insecure#I like her and their relationship before but no adaptation I've watched (not even new stories inspired by it)#make justice to the relationship Roxane and Cyrano have#They are so so so close. The best scenes are between them as they are#They feel so natural and so honestly close and honestly having a good time together#They are so open with each (ironically XD) and I adore when they joke and tease each other#And Cyrano reads so obviously enchanted so clearly enamoured so openly enraptured in the middle of the chitchat the jokes and the teasing#that it feels you can see his face between the lines#And in the middle of the chitchat the jokes and the teasing at times something makes him break for an instant and he has to recover#after the shock the fear or the pain#and it hits you like a punch in the guys every damn time#The relationship he has with his friend Le Bret is the other thing I'm enjoying the most in the play#I love him. I love how he smiles bitterly at Cyrano's feats because he worries he's making so many enemies#I love how he reprimands him over this several times and warns him over and over and cannot help#but not be entirely diverted or content with it as the other characters are because he honestly loves Cyrano#And I love that he loves him so he really cannot see why his friend should doubt himself so much when clearly he's not unlovable#And see? That girl that gave you one grape and would have given you the entire table obviously regarded you in kindness and love#Why wouldn't Roxane? You love her so and she is so fond of you just tell her. And his support is so that Cyrano actually half listens#And then the tenderness in those lines about how he could cry in anger and pride as much as he wanted but quietly tell him the truth#which is that he had found out Roxane didn't love him? I can't I love him and I love them#I like Christian as well but thus far for me it's Le Bret all the way the one who has the best dynamic with Cyrano other than Roxane#I'm really really loving this play. And I'm so glad I'm reading the French version alongside the translation#Because really no translation in any language I've found make it justice#And I say this as someone with mediocre French who hasn't used it much at all these years. I wish I could read this with native French eyes#It's fantastic truly. Fantastic. It honestly had me shaking many many times and my pulse rushed most of the time
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
unconditionally
#my art#jujutsu kaisen#jjk#yuji itadori#megumi fushiguro#itafushi#fushiita#fanart#jjk fanart#jujutsu kaisen fanart#megumi#yuuji#im shaky and numb the way this took years off my life#genuinely cannot believe i thought it was smart to make it a comic i could have stuck at a painting and it would have been fine#but nooooooo in my hubris i thought Surely im an expert at this longform stuff now Surely i can do it :)#and then it killed me it killed me dead this is like over twice as long as the train comic and 4 times as detailed#backgrounds . angles. i yearn fr death.#AND I HAD 2 WRITE THEM ACTUALLY TALKING GGSDH i am actually so insecure abt the way the dialogue flows gomen....#i wanted to add more to it to fix how clipped and rushed i think it reads#but that would mean drawing more expressions would mean drawing more panels would mean more gd hyDRANGEAS#so ultimately i decided 2 have the conversation take the hit because let me tell u.#if i have to draw. one more blue petal i will snap i will lose it#i knew tht would happen n wanted to alleviate some of the pain so i found a few brushes that helped speed up the process#but the thing w a lot of premade flower brushes is they also come preshaded n look uniform in a way that stands out badly against my style#so i had 2 render over them anyway........#yuuji's domain rly putting me through the wringer first the train station now death by a bajillion petals smh#all that to say tho . my labour of love . i am going to take a nap#hina.comic
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
i need daniel to be overcompensating for his insecurities so bad. 100 times more cocky and rude and aggressive and insensitive than he was as a human, falling back into old dangerous habits and vices, not just because now he has new energy and power and wealth to flaunt but because it's ALL he has, and he needs to cling onto it. play it up and revel in it so no one sees that underneath, he feels like a botched fledgling in the body of a sick, faded old man who maybe has no real idea why he was even made. that armand might think he failed in making him. that his maker didn't even really want him.
#i think vampirism isnt inherently torturous to him in any sort of moral way#but more in an inner self worth/image way#louis felt he was failing because he rejected/didn't enjoy human blood and death#i can see daniel being fine with killing but being insecure about the way he turned out/the way he is now#and his complicated connection with armand and what it all means for him. why he cares what he thinks or feels when he doesnt want to#but he does. and he has all these questions he needs him to answer#this sort of thing would be a way to connect him to louis further and also lestat now#louis who felt like a “botched vampire” for a long time and lestat who was immediately abandoned by his maker#and how lestat coped with what had been done to him by trying to fully embrace what he'd been turned into#anyway the bottom line is i think he should suffer and struggle with vampirism just as much as everyone else has in his own way#but he still has to be a massive insufferable asshole about it. and maybe get smacked around a bit because of it#iwtv#daniel molloy
752 notes
·
View notes
Text
Gideon would not be some suave fuckboy picking up chicks like skittles and somehow having Harrow as the person that settles her--Gideon has been starving for home and belonging since before she was born, Gideon doesn't know how to interact with strangers even if she barks out something aggressive or recites some line she's read, Gideon nearly blacks out when a girl she finds pretty implies the most minuscule of interest in her.
Gideon is also, without question, submissive when it comes to her relationships, and while she spits like a startled cat at Harrow (rightfully so, I will point out, as their relationship before Canaan House was violent and cruel and oppressive), she responds immediately and desperately to even the faintest taste of approval.
Even when we're in her head, even when we see her make some brazen statement or thought, even when she lashes out and tries to be bigger and bolder than she feels, we still see how awkward she is. She's an unsocialized teenager without peers. She's an absolute mess with no experience. She's the isolated teen who learned everything from material marked as too explicit for her a bit too young and took the scripts of them and then nearly choked on the reality of talking to a pretty girl who wasn't beating the shit out of her in a circumstance she could rightfully resent.
She sat there wanting Harrow to kiss her so bad, Nona dipped down to offer her relief that fell hollow as soon as Gideon knew it wasn't from her morbid mistress of bones. She's a performative little shit. An anxious, floundering, helpless butch who is quite literally dying to have someone use her, want her, and who doesn't know what to do with it other than artlessly throw up her feathers.
#now HARROW#what holds Harrow back is being an incredibly repressed nun who needs to feel 'inspired' in some way to act#but she WILL act#and I don't even think she questions it a lot#she's had people hyping her up her whole life and I think her confusion with romance is less about feeling insecure#and more about feeling undeserving due to the nature of what she has cost and what her responsibilities are#gideon nav#tlt
2K notes
·
View notes
Text
I am back for a hot second with the baby! Let's be real, Geralt gets a lot of heat in this au, but I do think he was very clear about what he could and couldn't be for Jaskier when they started this thing. Listening to this song later, and realizing that Jaskier was already in love with him at this point ... uff. Also a song about sacrifices in this au, from Jaskier??? *chef's kiss* also let's not think about essi in this au let's not let's just ignore this
#jaskier#geraskier#geralt of rivia#the witcher#art#geraskier lovechild#omegaverse#I think this started out as 'helping Jaskier through his heats' and just escalated terribly#the part in the books with essi being in love with Geralt and Geralt feeling uncomfortable with it and realizing Yen probably feels the sam#about him#that still absolutely happens because at this point Geralt IS in love with Yen#to be fair I think he also starts to realise that he is in love with Jaskier too#they are both slipping there already#but Geralt doesn't want Jaskier to feel that way about him#my boy: a. has a very fragile heart b. has attachment issues c. doesn't think he can make Jaskier happy in the long run#and he IS insecure he warns Jaskier - but he doesn't think it could be more than a crush#oh boy are they messy#i love them :)#also Milek singing songs that accidentally punch Geralt in the gut is my favourite thing#ONE MORE THING. about this song and the pronouns?? EXCUSE ME?
558 notes
·
View notes
Text
Thinking about how Diavolo’s feelings transcend time and how in the Nightbringer UR+ card Demon Lord’s Castle Tour this conversation happens.
When asked, “Do you wish to see your father?”
Diavolo responds:
“I suppose I do . . .” isn’t the typical reaction to how a child would feel about wanting to see their parent. Especially when said parent has essentially been in a coma for a year.
Along with how Diavolo describe his father.
It makes more sense why when you learn in Lesson 56 how Diavolo was treated by him growing up.
Diavolo can tell when others are lying but is unable to understand his father’s intentions.
Diavolo mentions that he lived a very sheltered life growing up. That from a young age his father never allowed him a chance to talk to anyone outside the castle.
His childhood friend was Mephistopheles. A demon literally RAISED to be his friend. Putting a barrier between the two because Mephistopheles would put Diavolo on a pedestal.
The isolating childhood he experienced riddled with his strict father constantly scolding him.
Despite everything MC is so important to him he wants to see his father again so we can meet.
#Demons and Humans can’t get married even in the present so it adds an extra layer him wanting to introduce us.#There’s a lot more you could add onto this (please do I’d love to hear other’s thoughts).#Like how Diavolo’s childhood affected him just look at the way he describes himself:#“The truth is I am a child in a way. A child who spends his time alone and never gets to do anything interesting.”#A lot of Diavolo’s poor behavior while not excused comes from his childhood.#How Diavolo admits to using his position to force others to do what he wants. Along with how he doesn’t like sharing.#Diavolo’s insecurities in his friendships with others.#Mainly Lucifer and Barbatos which makes sense with how they happened.#IE Forcing Barbatos to become his butler and the oath/deal with Lucifer regarding Lilith.#It’s clear Diavolo is very lonely and carrying a heavy burden.#I like that MCs presence is helping him change into a better person.#Also I don’t think Diavolo hates his father their relationship just isn’t good and very complicated.#Diavolo is such a wonderful character if you have any in-depth posts about him please tag me I’d love to read them!!!#I AM FILLED WITH SAPPY THOUGHTS ABOUT DIAVOLO TONIGHT!!!!#Obey Me#Obey Me Spoiler#Obey Me Nightbringer#OMSWD#Obey Me Diavolo#Diavolo#MaddyMajolish#Is it obvious I can’t sleep because I’m riddled with Blorbo thoughts
5K notes
·
View notes
Text
Madam Yu is so much of a character in so little space, it's fantastic, and it's funny to me being also in the Scum Villain fandom because. She is very much set up on the same character framework as Shen Jiu. She's that same Kind Of A Guy.
But ofc her trauma foundation is in being a proud woman in a world that does not value womanhood, and without the social skills to get anyone to forgive her for it. So she's less violently fucked up than he is.
But like him, she's all twisted up around the sensation that her suffering is her own fault for being the wrong sort of person. Which is an unutterably fucking corrosive mindset.
And I really think that she doesn't in the least believe that her husband loved or had an affair with Cangse Sanren. She's humiliated that other people believe it, and furious that he's encouraged them to, but she doesn't think it's true.
What she thinks is that Jiang Fengmian liked Cangse Sanren. As a person.
And of course, he doesn't like her. Because who could? Yu Ziyuan is not the sort of person people like.
And then Jiang Cheng, her son who takes after her, is basically just an extension of herself. So obviously, his father doesn't like him, either.
And she says this. Out loud, in front of him. While having honestly a really embarrassing meltdown.
I'm sure one of the things driving it is worry, because as she'd just acknowledged even though she's now blaming her husband about it they have to send either Jiang Cheng or Jiang Yanli into the hands of the Wen or face reprisals, which she doesn't want to face either, and obviously Jiang Yanli would be toast.
But if your response to worrying about your kid is to make fun of him, yell at him, shame him, and shout that his father doesn't love him in a weird tantrum before storming out and going to your room where he isn't allowed, you are failing as a parent on such a fantastic variety of levels idk where to start.
#hoc est meum#yu ziyuan#very much a person defined by her insecurities#and we really need to embrace that more#she's strong and she's proud but she's also undisciplined and cruel and kind of pathetic#and utterly incapable of expressing emotion in a healthy way#mdzs
1K notes
·
View notes
Text
parallels that deal me +10 psychic damage for every second I spend pondering them
#cameron is wilson in the way that amber is house#except the former goes unmentioned a lot more#both cameron & amber had the potential to fix house & wilson respectively#but that’s the issue#no level of well-adjustedness could root out this level of codependency. this particular brand of love#house and wilson are the antithesis of one another but in the sense that they compliment each other’s pathologies like a puzzle piece#not to use another hannigram quote again but. they’re identically different.#that’s why they’re soulmates <3#house md#hilson#house/wilson#greg house#gregory house#james wilson#hatecrimes md#allison cameron#GOD just thinking about it#house became irritated with cameron’s pursuit of him#because he’s insecure and believes he’s fundamentally unlovable#and her pattern with falling for ‘charity cases’ did nothing but affirm her lack of genuine interest in him#meanwhile. when it comes to wilson#he’s actually elated to know that he’s screwed up enough to never leave him#and the same goes for wilson#when he goes mattress shopping with amber#she encourages him to choose something he likes. for himself#because she doesn’t want him to indulge her to the point of resentment#and so he gives in! because it’s the healthy thing to do!#but when it comes to house#when house tells him to choose furniture that fits wilson’s tastes#he ends up buying an organ FOR HOUSE. and the response? ‘I like what this says about you wilson.’
919 notes
·
View notes
Text
the sandra lynn / fig conversation is driving me Insane. fig saying that sometimes she doesn’t wanna exist as herself at all…not wanting to ask her friends how they see her (because she’s afraid to hear their response) saying that to someone she is a monster and she Cannot stop thinking about it. sandra lynn starting the conversation saying she needs to step up but is also simultaneously taken aback about what fig expresses and doesn’t know how to responds to it and suggests getting ice cream. sandra lynn saying “convincing people they deserve good things is really tough” talking about herself but how it also reflects fig. insane!!
#if that conversation had kept going I would have started bawling!!#fully believe brennan was like ‘well oh shit this is getting dark and heavy quick let’s uh get some snow cones’#I will say I think Emily does a beautiful job here of showing teenage life#not a universal experience perhaps but definitely a common one#feeling so lost and insecure in who you are and under so much pressure to be a certain way#and her saying she doesn’t wanna exist#vs me resonating with ‘I don’t wanna die sometimes I wish I’d never been born at all’ lyrics#it was hard to watch ngl but it’s also bc Emily does Such a good job w emotional scenes!!#that woman is so emotionally invested you get emotional invested as well#if Emily axford cries I cry with her#and loved to see more of Sandra Lynn again <3#damn good scene#dimension 20#fantasy high#fantasy high spoilers#fantasy high junior year#fig faeth#sandra lynn faeth#emily axford#brennan lee mulligan
423 notes
·
View notes
Text
Sometimes Severus comes up to Minerva. Right up behind her when she's busy. He'll stand there for a good minute as she works on marking assignments and cursing the boy's youthful energy and brilliant eyes- both of which directly responsible for his finishing his work in half the time it takes her.
"What is it, Severus?" Minerva sighs. Might as well get the obligatory nonsense over and done with, she was due a dose of Severus's antics by now (Merlin forbid he go more than three days without bothering her with nonsensical questions or infuriating wit).
"Am I ugly, Minerva?" he asked. Never there was a being with such innocence in their voice.
Minerva took a moment to take in a breath and silently call on all her patience and all her strength. "Yes, very." Her tone was blunter than the knives used to decorate at Halloween- an incident with some particularly idiotic third years had them ban anything sharper than the corners of a book during the Halloween celebrations.
Severus gasped as if stabbed. "What? Minerva, I thought we were friends!"
Minerva snorted. "Any time we interact, it's completely against my will."
"Minerva! you lie so shamelessly it shocks me." Severus made as if to swoon, a hand clutching the right of his chest.
"You must be shocked; your heart isn't where it should be."
Honestly, Minerva had to admire the fact that the insolent little kitten did not falter in his dramatics with her pointing out the key flaw in his act. If anything, he seemed to be encouraged.
"Ay! The pain of the shock, it has spread throughout my chest! Ah, I cannot breathe!" Severus swayed on his feet, leaning against the chair that Minerva was sitting in. "Oh, how your lie shocks me!"
"Well, then, you had better tell me what exactly I lied about," Minerva said briskly, "before you gasp all the air out of your skinny little lungs, laddie."
"You said," the boy said, a sudden glint in his eye and none of the apparent weakness, standing to face her and one of those long, delicate fingers pointed straight at her, "you said, that our interactions are without your will."
"That is no lie, what part of this looks like it's my will?" Minerva replied, knowing full well she wasn't going to appreciate the cheeky answer Severus had prepared for her.
"Why, the part where you remain for my company, mother," Severus replied, his voice light. "Surely, if you didn't want this, you would have, in your infinite wisdom, simply have employed your great power and assumed your famous feline form and just walked away from me."
Minerva fought her smile. His cheek was infuriating while his logic impeccable. "Perhaps I am simply conversing my energy, you arrogant wee rascal."
"You? Too lazy to avoid a nuisance?" Severus scoffed. "Minerva, you wound me. Don't you know how I know you? You've done much more to avoid the mildest of annoyances, do you truly think I believe that you are here against your will merely to converse your energy?"
Minerva let him see the flicker of a smile disgusted as a smirk, letting the bothersome raven have a little treat for his cleverness, hinting to him that he had essentially won this particular argument. "At my age you no longer have the patience to waste on annoyances. You learn to value your peace. You will understand that some day, I hope, little one."
"And if I die, my hair still black and my skin still smooth?"
Merlin, did the child have a turn towards the morbid. Minerva ignored the voice in her that told her that this would have been a retort of her own had she been in a similar conversation.
"Then you'll die a fool."
"A fool, perhaps, but my funeral will be the biggest," he replied, moving to sit on her desk and grabbing the biscuit jar. Minerva intercepted, lifting it from his grip and replacing it with a towel. His protests died in his confusion at the towel, and Minerva huffed and began to wipe his hands as if he was a child. She did not trust him to correctly clean his hands after handling goodness knows what when experimenting with his potions and she didn't care if he knew it.
"Aye, and how did you figure that?" she asked.
"Surely if I die young, I shall be the first. Therefore you all will be part of the funeral-"
"What makes you think I would want to attend your funeral, you little rascal?" She let go of his hands, almost satisfied that they weren't contaminated.
Severus ignored her and instead took a biscuit from the jar. "You will all be there, therefore I will have the biggest funeral. If I die old, you all shall be gone, so my funeral will be the smallest."
Minerva tried not to think of how depressing that sounded, how lonely it seemed. For a brief moment she felt guilty for being so old and he so young. She involuntarily could see him in her mind's eye, going through their funerals until he stood alone. She and the others- Rolanda, Pomona, Poppy, even Fillus and Hagrid- they were all of an age, weren't they? They could expect their lives to reach the end around the same time, surely? Severus was but a child next to them, he'd stand alone one day.
Minerva tried to ignore the ache in her chest at the thought of him standing alone. Merlin, no. He was far too young. No.
"You truly are besotted with the morbid and the miserable, you melanchonic masochist," she said, her tone just a trifle too sharp to be a simple retort.
Severus paused, swallowing the biscuit. Then he answered. "Ah, but the morbid is much more fascinating, the forbidden has a certain thrill, dear mother." His voice was a little softer, and his fingers, slightly coated in crumbs, were gentle when he tapped her forehead. He was sorry he upset her.
"You and your thrills," Minerva scolded, "yet you cannot even eat a biscuit without making a mess of yourself." Yet even as she spoke, the hand that she used to swipe the crumbs away, was gentle, almost tender, in its movement. She had quite forgiven him.
How could she remain angry? At this boy who looked at her with a scowl of indignation yet whose deep, dark eyes twinkled with mischief and cleverness and brilliance, who stood taller than her, yes, yet was far more delicate in his build than she had ever been, whose hair was as dark as hers had been in her youth, carelessly falling across his forehead. No, she could not remain angry.
If only he had been in Gryffindor, perhaps then she would have noticed him sooner. Or rather, if only her eyes didn't only open for her Gryffindors. How this boy could ever look at her without resentment and anger, she didn't know. Then again, he had been so incredibly isolated and lonely, was it any wonder he let go of his rightful grudges and instead accepted her friendship?
Minerva blinked as if soot from the fireplace got in her eyes. She didn't want him to notice the tears that almost inevitably formed whenever she thought about him. Who would have thought that she'd cry so much for the little devil?
"I'll leave you to your work, dear mother," Severus said cheerfully, hopping off her desk.
"Aye, after you've cleared out my biscuit jar, you villain" Minerva grumbled, looking into the empty jar. Severus shrugged.
"You ought to see it as a compliment towards your taste, really," Severus said. "But I see I have taken the last of your patience"- for indeed, Minerva looked ready to strangle him- "so I shall take my leave. Good night, my good Headmistress, and may you have peace in the silver embrace of the moon!"
And with a laughing twinkle in his eye and a boyish bow, Severus Snape left the room.
Minerva sighed. She wasn't sure if it was out of relief, or because she may have felt some sorrow at his departure.
The door opened again, and a rather meek Severus poked his head in.
"Er, Minerva?" he asked.
"Yes, Severus?"
"Er." Severus stepped in, looking away from her, walking with the awkward gait of a newborn foal, and the nervousness of a deer. "Er, Minerva?"
"Yes, Severus?"
"Am I really ugly, mother?" His voice was a whisper. His raven hair curtained his face, hiding his shame at asking such a pathetic question, and his fingers picked at one of the cuticles of a nail.
Minerva smiled, and walked to him. Softly she brushed the boy's hair out of his face and gently tucked it behind his ear.
"Only as long as you let yourself believe it, dear heart."
#severus snape#pro snape#professor severus snape#minerva mcgonagall#professor mcgonagall#right this was supposed to be a silly piece where snape simply asks minerva if she thinks he's ugly she says yes (messing with each other)#only for him to come back later all insecure and her being like “ofc you arent ugly”#but somehow it got blended with my lther thought of her and sev having a conversation#where sev essentially jokes about dying young refusing to die last#a sort of dark irony if you will because he did in fact die young#a conversation minerva recalls after he's gone and how she was like Nonsense only for it to come true#so yeah there's definitely a bit of the foreshadowy reference to Sev's death#because i like to be angsty#also to be clear severus is in his twenties here#he's been at hogwarts as a teacher long enough now to be more playful and silly and a general nuisance#but also a little affectionate too in his own way#(and definitely seeking a lil reassurance)#and he's definitely been here long enough for minerva to have 1) adopted him 2) realise how she's responsible for his trauma here#and 3) have way too many what ifs and regrets#anyway sev being a playful lil shit gives me life what can I say he enjoys being dramatic#especially if it annoys minerva
157 notes
·
View notes
Text
Duke Thomas and Damian Wayne.
The Boy Wonder #5 // Batman: Rebirth // Robin War // The Boy Wonder #5 // Batman (2011) #45 // Robin War // Detective Comics #1034 // The Cursed Wheel Part 3 // Robin War // Red Robin #14 // Batman & The Signal #1 // Teen Titans (2016) Annual #2 // Robin War
#duke thomas#damian wayne#robin#batman#i need people to realise how good their relationship is and could be#like. in batman & the signal where duke's insecurities are represented by DAMIAN YELLING AT HIM#because early damian is very much a symbol of duke's insecurities around not being robin#but also. duke prods at DAMIAN's insecurities about not being a good enough robin either#there's something about the way bruce takes to duke so much easier and more quickly than to damian#so for damian it's how dare this new robin come in without training without bloodline and take my place#and for duke it's how dare the current robin tell me who i can and can't be#and yet they really like and respect each other too#i'm going insane over them i swear
155 notes
·
View notes
Text
I think about Leo’s “I’m your least favorite” comment to Splinter in “Down with the Sickness” a lot. It’s likely just a throwaway comment, a way to get Splinter to leave him alone before Leo gets sick too, but I can’t help but wonder if Leo believes it on some level.
Obviously it’s not true, Splinter loves him as much as he loves the others, but…it wouldn’t be shocking if Leo believed otherwise. After all, just in “Many Unhappy Returns” alone, Splinter has, with no hesitation, said comments like “my other sons would have taken this seriously” and “I knew I should’ve brought purple”, said “no” to Leo’s “I love you”, and pretty blatantly didn’t extend any trust in Leo’s plan even after Leo was fairly effortlessly defeating their opponents.
It was only after, when they’d already won, that Splinter finally gives him a “it was all you my son!” And…that’s basically it. Raph is the one who announces his trust in Leo. Not their father, even though Splinter is the one to witness Leo lowering his walls for once (which Splinter doesn’t react well too, because Leo only lowers his walls in the most hectic of times, and because he lowers them only then, either no one is around or no one is in the right state of mind to respond properly, leading to Leo building his walls back up, and the cycle continues.)
Again, it’s not because Splinter doesn’t love Leo, but Leo…can’t be feeling too good about all that. The way he never reacted surprised about any of Splinter’s words too…
He may know that Splinter loves them all, as a group, but individually…I don’t think Leo believes he ranks all that high with that love. Gives another meaning to “I’m nothing without my brothers” huh?
(Of course, I’m willing to bet the invasion changed that understanding, but with that comes the potential misunderstanding that his father’s outright love is tied to Leo sacrificing himself.)
#rottmnt#rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles#rottmnt leo#rise leo#rottmnt headcanons#again OBVIOUSLY SPLINTER LOVES HIM DEARLY#but I wouldn’t blame Leo for thinking he’s loved the LEAST#Splinter also blatantly thinking Donnie is funnier doesn’t help#Leo being a Leo and thus being a Daddy’s Boy at his core doesn’t help#man splinter if you tell Leo he was the first one you held he’d be riding that high for MONTHS#but yeah I just think that with all of Leo’s insecurities…this all isn’t all that unlikely a conclusion to make#and I’ve said it before but…Leo and Splinter don’t really have a softer moment between them unlike the others#that must sting#this isn’t to say that Splinter was WRONG in being upset with Leo in Many Unhappy Returns#because Splinter had no way of knowing Leo’s plan would work out#but again - Leo has to be so confident and cocky because goddangit SOMEONE has to believe in him#so he lets it be himself#hell even the hug that comes after they incapacitate the shredder was more of a ‘Leo was there but it’s to all of them’#I want them to have a good father son talk so bad#is it any wonder why Leo imprints so quick on Hueso#when the man sees him break and decides to help?#can you imagine how much that means to someone like Leo#that someone with all the reason in the world to leave Leo to deal with things alone#chooses not only to help him but to actively protect him after as well#I bet with Splinter there’s always a voice in the back of his head#that says his dad’s love of him is more obligation than anything#and if they didn’t have that DNA connection it wouldn’t be there#so Hueso having no connection but still sticking by Leo’s side in Leo’s moment of weakness…it probably means a lot#it’s a shame we didn’t truly get that with Splinter and Leo#now I want Hueso and Splinter to meet bc like…they’re both dads! and it’d be interesting
714 notes
·
View notes
Text
my personal headcanon is the vees were unremarkable nobodies when they were alive. i just love it as a thematic throughline for them. they love to let the public of hell speculate on them being famed and acclaimed since before death, but the the truth is they were a d-list failed influencer that got by on cheap controversey and scamming, a broke junkie who burned every shaky bridge he ever had, and a worn-out broadcast production assistant with more rejected auditions and tossed out script pitches than he could count. nobody missed them when they were gone, nobody cared who they were until they were dead.
#because villains who didn't start off supremely powerful are more interesting to me#vees#it's not that they CAN'T be better. or that they're simply ignorant of the ways they fuck up others lives#they actually all do have that knowledge of being the underdog. and it's made them all the more shitty#because they never want to be those people again#narratives about people who make each other worse <3#to be clear they were still shitty people in life. manipulative. consumed by greed and envy. all their individual flaws etc etc#but hell made them into the absolute worst versions of themselves#of course what their Worst Self is and the journey/length of time/initial reaction to being in hell varies#like val sees hell as a continuation of the things happening in life. just w/ the power dynamics always privileging him#it's the same drugs and violence. except the violence isn't just survival anymore but the chance to indulge his deeply sadistic desires#vox has completely dissociated from his time alive. that person is dead and he's reinvented himself 1000 times over since then#90% of the time he has those memory files shoveled into a hidden directory#he refuses to acknowledge that he's still haunted by some of the same insecurities from almost a century ago#val doesn't necessarily see his living self in a fond light but he does see that person as fundamentally him#velvette thinks life was full of people who weren't her demographic but fortunately that's been fixed by sinners!#they just couldn't Get Her and that was all their faults#the primary way they view their past selves can be summed up as: scorn (vox) apathy (valentino) and in denial (velvette)#sorry the bulk of the post was in the tags. i will be doing this again#the scorn is the coping mechanism for shame. of course
217 notes
·
View notes
Text
Based on my favorite gif lately
#my art stuff#digital art#baldurs gate 3#bg3#astarion#batstarion#once again specifying this is a spawn astarion with some sort of wild shape thing#bat#good morning#gif#I’ve been in such a weird place mentally about art lately#I just keep stopping myself from drawing things cus I want to draw Astarion -#- but fsr my brain decided I draw him wrong and thus makes it pointless to even start#bat form is fine - I have no problems with it. But in his normal form? no can do buckaroo.#It’s one part why I haven’t shared much art lately - I don’t get happy enough about the “quality”#then just don’t share it as a result - in turn making me feel worse because I’m not posting - making me doubt myself more - etc etc#idk man - I got way too giddy earlier today cus someone could tell this was Astarion - even though this isn’t even the version of him I -#- feel insecure about#I keep seeing these artists making more realistic art and cool comics and interactions - most of which are shaded really beautifully -#- and all I can think about is how I CAN’T do that - even if it wouldn’t fuck me up mentally#I just put too much stress on my ability to create realism and I keep “failing” at doing that (by actively avoiding it for my own health)#idk man - I just wish I felt better about Astarion’s stupid chin OTL
179 notes
·
View notes
Text
important to gimli characterization. to me. is that while he's generous & steadfast & caring where it matters he is also just a little bit vain. not in a delusional way or a way that causes problems but like. he is aware that he's good looking & good at what he does and is pleased with himself for it. he's aware of his own good qualities & proud of them in a way that makes his friends roll their eyes a little. but he's charming & realistic about it and also Right so you can't be too annoyed. guy who takes way too long styling his hair & beard because he knows he has very nice hair. guy who will brag a little about his axework because he knows he's just that good. do you see what I'm getting at
#thoughts#tolkien#sometimes people characterize him as being insecure particularly re: relationship w legolas in a way that simply does not ring true to me#at least not in that way. like I think his insecurities are largely external; he's not insecure about himself but he is#deeply conscious & touchy about other people's (mis)perception of him if that makes sense#i.e. his insecurity is Way more ''can other people see me as me well enough to understand me & see my good qualities''#than ''am i in and of myself good enough''#ANYWAYS.#gimli
512 notes
·
View notes
Text
looking back at steven universe and god. that show had such good diversity in their designs that very few animated shows before or since it have had. like there's the obvious diversity in race and weight representation but also just like. all the different body shapes and hair types and facial features. all of which were depicted without being a shorthand for a character being Gross And Comically Ugly (or worse, evil). like i think watching that show in my teen years (which are like. peak years for developing body based insecurities) was good for my self esteem. because with pretty much any trait that i had that i was made to feel bad about, there would be a character from my favourite show that had that trait.
#eliot posts#steven universe#su#idk why but i'm feeling nostalgic abt that show today#when i was young‚ my family (whether on accident or on purpose) made me feel insecure about the size of my nose#(honestly it's only slightly above average w a little bump but they made it sound huuuge)#but then there was connie! who had a huge aquiline nose!#a trait that i'd only seen before to denote that a character was old/ugly/evil#but connie was none of those things. she was a smart and brave and caring young girl. who loved fantasy books just like me#she made me feel seen and represented in an equally important way that the show's queer characters did#my one wish: more visibly disabled characters#give me a congenital amputee to latch onto
124 notes
·
View notes