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the-cosmic-teapot · 4 months ago

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To Be Loved By Nanami Kento

Nanami x reader

WC: 10,705

TW: Slight age gap (4 years), Canon-compliant, fluff, angst, canon-typical gore, big emotions, Nanami is such a gentleman, drinking, reader gets very drunk (Shoko), kinda steamy but no smut, marriage, family, Not a happy ending (ANGST!!!)

*Not proofread (my husband said his word limit is 5,000)

Summary: The story of how you and Nanami fall in love.

A/N: Hi pals, it's been a minute (like a couple months, oops)! This has been in the works for the majority of that time, but I couldn't bring myself to finish it until now. Let me know if you all like the longer fics or if I should break them up into parts instead. Also, I am looking for more proofreaders, if you are interested message me. As always, feedback is welcome!

P.S- The reader has a cursed technique that is using electrical energy and the gloves are what is used to conduct the energy.

~Cosmic

June 2012

High school graduates are left with difficult decisions to make upon the end of their education. Differing from a typical student, graduating from Jujutsu High in Tokyo meant alternate career options; choosing to become a sorcerer, or leaving the world of Jujutsu for a mundane job. As you pack up your home of the past three years, you ponder this quandary as boxes of memories are put away one by one. On one hand, you were trained alongside some of the best sorcerers in generations, and, if we’re being honest, you’re one of them. Now on the other lives a normal life, and a normal job. One where you don’t face nearly as high a mortality rate. You could find love, have a normal family, and you could live in ignorance of your fellow sorcerers’ sacrifices.

Moving out of the dorms at Jujutsu High was bittersweet, you have a lot of memories with your friends, and even a sparse few with Gojo– as annoying as he can be. You found a nice apartment right outside of the business district in Tokyo and you were even up to get promoted to a grade one sorcerer. Things are looking up for you and your new independent life.

Before you were able to fully get the rank of grade one sorcerer you needed to do a few missions with current grade one sorcerers, which is now what you were being sent to do. Usually, you worked with Mei Mei because your personalities meshed well, unlike your fighting styles, but this time was different. Before you stood a tall, well-built man with blonde hair in a suit. The tan suit was a bit plain, but his bright blue button-down and patterned tie really stands out. Ijichi explained what grade-one curse this man and you needed to eradicate in an abandoned nursing home in Osaka. The man, Nanami, is to pick you up at the crack of dawn to catch a flight as opposed to driving through the night to get there.

As you packed a small bag with a few necessities– the return flight was the following afternoon– you wondered why it took so long to meet Nanami. By the end of your second year, you had met most all of the grade one sorcerers from one gathering or another, but not Nanami. You had a few options now, you could look him up on social media or ask Gojo about the very muscular man. You decided on the former because Gojo would endlessly tease you for asking, plus you could stalk him online from the comfort of your bed. From your extensive research, you learned that there was not a trace of Nanami online other than a post from Gojo a year ago that tagged a deactivated account. Now you either have to ask Gojo or the even more embarrassing option of trying to make small talk with Nanami tomorrow. You were at a loss, was teasing from Gojo worth learning more about the undeniably attractive man? Nanami seems the type to not talk much, so small talk may not even tell you more about him.

Your phone dings as the latest episode of a trashy show’s credits roll. You didn’t have the number saved, but you could quickly tell it was Nanami because of the overly formal language and punctuation of the message. He asked about where he should pick you up and if you wanted him to grab coffee before getting you. As you respond you also internally scream as this man keeps getting more attractive and you’ve met him once. Is it weird to be this attracted to a man you’ve just met? You suppose it doesn’t matter much, it was just a superficial attraction at best now.

The following morning you wake up and get ready as usual, skincare, a little makeup, and finally getting dressed. You grab the overnight bag and your backpack for the trip there and head down to the lobby to wait for Nanami. After doing one final look over to make sure you weren't forgetting anything you finally leave and lock up your apartment. When you get to the lobby Nanami is already there holding his phone, probably about to call you.

“Ah, good. You’re punctual, do you have all of your equipment ready to go?” You give a quick nod knowing you placed your sleek black gloves in the front pouch of your backpack. “Good, let’s go then,” Nanami said. He was in another suit, not a hair out of place. Without another word, he took the overnight bag and began to walk out to his car.

He placed your stuff in the trunk of the modern black car and got the passenger side door for you. God, he truly is a gentleman. The interior of his car is clean and smells like a new car scent. You noticed a pastry on the middle console and two coffees in the cup holder after getting comfy for the quick trip to the airport.

“I got you a strawberry Danish, as well as the coffee, I hope you like it,” Nanami says as he buckles in and starts the car. He adjusts his glasses, and checks before backing out of the 20-minute parking spot.

“Actually, I’m allergic to strawberries… but thank you for the coffee and thinking of me!” You said with an awkward, tight-lipped smile, feeling bad that he wasted his money on you. “Oh, I’m sorry,” Nanami spoke. “I’ll keep that in mind next time” You give him a small ‘hump’ as acknowledgement.

The drive to the airport is quick, the bright lights of Tokyo pass by in a blur together in a rainbow of color. You wonder what this mission will entail, this was a grade-one curse, so Nanami could handle this alone if needed; theoretically, you should be able to do the same. Being this close to Nanami was strange, it felt almost intimate in the dark morning. You could smell the cologne he was wearing and the heat coming off of his body. He smelled amazing, woody and smokey, with notes of whisky.

Soon enough you notice Nanami pulling into a parking garage and getting a ticket and finding a parking space. Getting out you go to grab your overnight bag but Nanami already has it in hand with his.

“I can get my bag if you want.” You said quickly. “You really don’t need to.” You say to the back of the tall man as he walks away.

“It’s fine, it’s not heavy.” He said plainly, walking towards the walkway to the check-in desks. His steps are quick and driven by efficiency. You could tell he will be much more professional than Mei Mei, and way harder to get a read on.

As the plane lands you listen to the flight attendant about the typical unloading procedures, you worry about the mission and whether you will make a fool out of yourself in front of a grade-one sorcerer, especially one as attractive as Nanami. You remember this feeling when working with Mei Mei for the first time too. After you get your backpack from the floor you reach into the overhead compartment for your other bag but Nanami already has it in hand.

“I told you I’ve got your bag, '' Nanami says, bending down to get his bag on the floor. You shivered at the thought of him being so close to you.

“Okay, if you really don’t mind,” you say blushing slightly, moving to get off of the plane trailing after Nanami.

When you leave the airport the sun is shining and there is a small breeze. It ruffles Nanami’s hair making him look even more divine than he already does. He hails a cab to go to the hotel so you can check in and go over what intel you have on the cursed spirit. The cab ride was uneventful at best, but your anxiety was through the roof. You could feel your heartbeat in your throat and the sweat covering your palms.

You zone out sitting on one of the chairs with your and Nanami’s things while he checks into your rooms. Suddenly, he appears in front of you with a disgruntled look across his sharp, perfect features. He explains that the hotel screwed up and only has one room (and one bed) available at the moment, he runs a hand through his pristine hair and sighs.

“We can look for other hotels in the area if you are uncomfortable sharing a room, or I can sleep on the couch,” Nanami says in his usual tone. “The woman at the desk said that the former may be unlikely because there are a few conventions in town.” He runs a hand through his hair again, staring down at you through his glasses.

“I don’t mind staying here, but I can take the couch.” You say it is not fair that he has already done so much for you. “I can sleep almost anywhere.” You say, which was a little lie, but it’s one night. Plus, you are considerably smaller than Nanami, he towers over you and he is broader than you because of the bulk of his muscles.

“We can talk about sleeping arrangements when we get settled tonight.” He says after a moment of silence. Nanami walks away back to the desk and finishes checking in.

He comes back with two keys in hand and moves to get your bags. You look up at him and take the cards so he has his hands free for the bags. The walk to the room was silent, as was moving around to get settled into the nice room. There is a sort of living room then a small hallway with the bathroom on one side and a closet on the other and finally, the bedroom section was at the back. The bed is massive, most likely a king, and there is a wall of floor-to-ceiling windows facing the foot of the bed. You stand at the window taking in the view of the city and ponder how this mission will go. Taking a few deep breaths to calm your nerves you move back to the living room area with Nanami sitting on a comically small couch.

“So, the nursing home isn’t far from here, we can walk there,” Nanami said, looking at the packet with all of the information gathered for this mission. He moved over and motioned for you to join him on the couch. As you sit next to him you realize how small the couch really is, it’s more of an oversized armchair. “The curse shouldn’t take too long to exercise, but there are bound to be more, lower grade curses.” He adjusts his glasses and hands the packet to you as he moves to get up.

You look over the packet and see that the building has been abandoned for a few years after the owners were convicted of selling deceased residents organs without the families’ knowledge or approval. The building has recently been the site of the disappearance of teens, which has made more teens want to break in and do whatever teens do when they break into buildings. The local police have put locks on the doors and tape up to discourage more teens from entering, but this did little to dissuade them. This is why Nanami and you were called here, the 10 missing teens were concerning and the confirmed presence of a curse made this case a top priority for the higher-ups in Jujutsu society.

Nanami lowered the veil over the condemned building and you slipped your gloves on, as you both took in the large structure. It was at least three stories high and there was mention of a basement for laundry from the packet. The smell of mold and mildew hit you in the face as soon as Nanami opened the door. There was graffiti all over the place and vines and weeds sprouting up from the cracked concrete and broken windows.

You mention splitting up to make the search go quicker, Nanami told you to focus on looking for the missing kids while he looks for the grade one curse. Of course, this is not how the mission goes, you run into a horde of grade three and lower curses in the basement hallway. As you fight them off you begin to hear the sobs of a few girls. You make your way to a locked door where you very clearly hear crying, knocking on it, and saying you were here to help. When the door opens about five girls no older than fifteen are trembling and latching on to you for dear life.

You introduce yourself to them and tell them that your partner and you will try your best to get them out safely. They all mention seeing some of the others they were with being dragged away but not killed in front of them. You shoot a text to Nanami about the girls you found and begin to lead the shaking, but not crying, girls out of the basement and to the outside of the building. Nanami joins you a few minutes after getting the girls out and mentions how you did well.

Going back into the buildings after talking to the girls a bit more to gather more information about the groups they came from. After another hour of searching you find the bodies of three of the boys, all drained of blood leaned up against a wall on the ground floor. It was shocking to see that a curse did not mutilate the young boys. You move on to the next floor where you run into Nanami and he mentions finding two boys on the verge of death that he brought outside and tended to their wounds.

Wandering around a bit more you finally come across the grade one curse, its cursed energy was intense. The spirit looks like its melting bodies together, one pile of flesh with multiple eyes and appendages. The largest of their eyes is brown and vertical in the center of the mass and quickly takes notice of Nanami and you and begins to attack, flailing arms and legs towards you and Nanami. You were first to strike the curse with a zap of your cursed technique directly to the center eye. Nanami, quick to follow, slashed a few limbs off with his blunt sword. Flowing through the motions of a fight, zaps, a few punches, and maybe a kick to the curse was the easy part. The more difficult part was knowing if you were doing enough to impress Nanami or at least not look like a complete idiot in front of him. With a final right hook into the curse imbued with your technique, the curse jolted back and collapsed into a disintegrating heap on the dirty floor.

“Good, you did well,” Nanami says calmly while swiftly dispelling the blood from his blade in a singular smooth motion.

The walk back to the hotel is significantly less awkward for you mostly because you were actually talking now, and not weird small talk. This was an actual conversation, about what you enjoy, what books you like, and so forth. You had a lot in common with the stoic man, you both enjoyed cooking and reading, much preferred over going out. You were beginning to toe the line between a schoolgirl crush based on superficial attraction into a full-blown crush, born from knowing his brain. There are a few outcomes, all but one of which will fragment your heart into millions of pieces. This is dangerous territory you are beginning to tread.

Back at the hotel you shower and take time to get the sweat and blood off of you. The hot shower felt like heaven on your sore muscles and the steam began to fog the mirror. You wash your hair with your shampoo and conditioner while you think about the day. The thoughts quickly drift from the nursing home and the teenagers you saved to the dashing man sitting outside. He is hard to not fall for, he’s charming and his looks could rival that of a man sculpted by the gods. In addition to his stunning looks his personality seems to be a perfect fit for your own. The list of Nanami’s attributes just seems to grow with the amount of time you spend with him.

Meanwhile, the blonde man sitting outside on the couch begins working on the report for the case. He begins recounting the day’s events, typing it all out in the correct format. All of the events from what was known to the final death count of the curse. Once again, Nanami’s life became mundane; getting sent on missions, exercising the cursed spirit, typing up a report, and repeating. When he got off of work he would make dinner, maybe try a new wine, most nights were the same for him. Being sent away from Tokyo was a nice change, but not much of one, now he would just have dinner out. However, now there was someone else with him. Someone who he wants to get to know, someone who he can see as a friend.

He has thought of dating, but with his re-entrance into the world of Jujutsu that will be difficult. There is no way for him to have a “normal” life when he faces death every day. He cannot put someone he loves in a position to mourn him, he has been down this road before and it hurts. Honestly, part of the reason Nanami left after graduation was because he didn’t want to see more of his colleagues fall; moreover, he did not want to see his juniors fall even more so. Despite this, he found himself back in the world of Jujutsu; sitting here with you in the shower.

When Nanami was told he would be paired with a semi-grade one sorcerer he thought the person would look more intimidating, not the small, cute form he met the day prior. He was pleasantly surprised this morning when you were right on time when he came to pick you up. In the car, he could smell your hair products– vanilla and jasmine– as well as notice how you anxiously fidget with your hands. You were efficient in the airport, which he admired very much, as opposed to Gojo, who would stroll in an hour before his flight with little care about missing it entirely.

Nanami finishes the report and he hears you step out of the shower. He stands, stretches, and then heads for his bag to gather his clothes to get ready to shower. As he makes sure he has grabbed all of his necessities– underwear, pants, and a top– his phone dings. Sitting back on the bed with his stuff sitting neatly on the dresser he reads a text from Gojo asking about how you both were getting along. Nanami opted to send a short, nondescript text on how you performed today.

When you finally leave the warm, steamy bathroom you see Nanami sitting on the bed tapping away at his phone, presumably texting. You move your stuff into your bag as your stomach growls very loudly. In your squatting position, you make eye contact with Nanami who now has his clothing in hand to shower and clean up for dinner.

“I’m going to excuse myself, I’d suggest looking up where you want to eat,” Nanami says standing to his full height, making you feel smaller as he has to tilt his head further down as he does.

“Okay, I can do that,” you say, zipping up your bag and grabbing socks and your bag with your wallet and other necessities to go out.

As Nanami stepped into the still-warm and steamy bathroom he could smell your lotion and perfume. Everything smelled like you, even the other towels that are folded under the sink; it’s a smell that is just as intoxicating as the most expensive bottle of wine he’s sampled. He peeled his blue shirt off his body and began the shower, the hot water and steam fogging up the mirror again. Slipping out of his trousers and underwear he steps into the shower with a sigh. He could smell you even more in the shower, the hot steam lifting the remnants of your hair products to his nose directly.

Nanami thought about the day and Gojo’s text. As with most things, Gojo most likely had another intention than the one Nanami initially interpreted. Nanami could not let himself wonder what it would be like to pursue you in any capacity other than friendship; not even for a moment. There is no denying you are attractive and he could tell that you shared a lot of his interests. He pushes these thoughts of what can never be out of his mind so he can finish his shower and get to dinner.

You go with a small sushi place with good reviews online and Nanami truly did not mind you picking. Initially, you had given him three options and he was indifferent to all of them. This was new to you because when you went with Gojo he would insist on going to his pick, given he always paid so you had no qualms.

Walking alongside Nanami was strange, his muscular frame towered over yours and looked ten times more intimidating than you with just his resting face unobscured by the armless glasses he wore. The evening air was cooling down from the high temperatures of the day and a soft breeze flowing and it made Nanami’s hair flow slightly from its perfect position atop his head. He was in a light green sweater and light-wash jeans, which was such a change from his typical suit and tie. Casual suited him, as well as his scent without cologne, it was fresh and kind of minty.

Getting to the restaurant you seat yourself at a nice table near the window. A server stops by to give you menus and welcome you to the establishment. As you look over the menu you fail to notice how Nanami looks at you. Your hair was pulled back with a few strands falling out around your face, framing it nicely. He thought about what a normal life would be like, how it would be to be in a relationship without the threat of death, and most of all what it would be like to be loved by someone. He once again found himself pushing these thoughts out of his mind.

The night flows seamlessly from dinner to a little cafe for coffee and dessert. Conversation hardly stopped from when you sat down for dinner to now, in this cute little cafe with cat-themed decor adorning the walls. You were the last two in the cafe with the barista cleaning the counter and display case. This is a night you didn’t want to end, everything has been amazing, from conversation to food, and finally Nanami. The more time you spent with Nanami the more you wanted to spend with him. His presence is intoxicating.

As you walk back to your hotel there is a light air between you both. The moon is bright and shines on the pair of you. He is close, very close, his arm is close to brushing with yours. To an unsuspecting eye, you looked like a beautiful young couple.

Getting back to the hotel room faced you with the dilemma of the one bed. Nanami initially said he could sleep on the couch, but seeing how large he is compared to the overgrown armchair that had to be out of the question. You could take the couch, but something told you he would never let that happen.

Nanami once again let you take the bathroom first. You dug through your bag for your shorts and oversized tee shirt to get changed into. When you open the bathroom door you see Nanami’s toiletries on the counter opposite your own. What would Nanami be like to live with, being able to see your things with his? He seems like the type of person who has a solid routine and rarely deviates from that. After washing your face and undressing you fold your pants and top neatly to put on for the trip home. The silky shorts felt nice after your legs had been confined all day and the tee shirt fell over the hem of them perfectly.

Nanami is waiting on the bed with his sleepwear folded neatly beside him. When he looks up at you his hair falls away from his face, most likely from the lack of product. He is so handsome in the dim lighting of the hotel room. You both begin to speak only to stop when you realize the other wants to say something. You smile slightly at the usually awkward situation.

“You can go first,” Nanami said, standing to his full height. His hair shifting subtly with his change in position.

“Oh, um, I’m all done in the bathroom,” you said, fidgeting with your clothing you still have in hand.

“Ah, I was going to say that you can take the bed because I really don’t mind,” He said in that deep voice. The voice that could make angels weep.

“That couch is too small for you, if anything I can actually fit on it to sleep,” you say as you move to place your clothing on the dresser opposite the bed. “We could also share the bed if you really won’t let me take the couch,” you say without thinking of the implications of what this fully means.

The air seems to stand still as you both process what you just said. Nanami is a man you just met no more than twenty-four hours prior, and you mentioned you could share a bed. If this were anyone else you would call them crazy for how risky that is with a strange man. Given, Nanami is not entirely strange, he seems to have some set of moral compass given how he is dead set on taking the couch. Your face is completely flushed red and Nanami is sporting a light pink blush as well. Why did you have to say that?

“I, um,” he paused, coughing a little, “I don’t mind taking the couch,” Nanami says, slightly blushing at the thought of sleeping next to you. The smell of your soap and lotion still stuck in his nose and mind, the sweet notes of vanilla and the floral ones of the jasmine would keep him up all night. Nanami also knew he would be too stressed trying to be respectful of your space that he would not sleep at all if he had to share a bed with you. “The couch will be okay for one night, I promise I will be okay there.” He finishes still sporting a faint blush across his sharp cheeks.

You take a breath trying to calm down. “Are you sure?” You asked for a final time, still feeling guilty he will probably not get any sleep on the couch.

“Yes, I would not have said so if I didn’t mean it,” Nanami says firmly, looking at you directly.

You both hold eye contact for a moment, the air thick between your bodies. It feels like you both want to say something, but words don’t come to either of you. His hazel eyes are intense as they still don’t leave your face. You feel your heart rate spike from being under his gaze. Your face could rival a prize-winning tomato for how red you are; Nanami is faring better, at least on the surface. All of his thoughts from earlier, all of the thoughts of a normal life were flooding back into his mind and he couldn’t shove them away fast enough. You are dangerous because there is something about you that makes Nanami feel like he could be with you in that way.

The moment is ruined by the phone ringing in the other room, flashing with the extension from the front desk. Nanami takes another second, keeping your gaze before he answers. You are not paying attention to who is on the other end because you are trying your hardest to calm down. It feels like you’ve just run a mile without prep with how you need to catch your breath.

“That was the front desk,” Nanami cuts through your thoughts with his clear, stern voice. “Another group canceled their reservation, so a room on the second floor is now available,” he continues, clearing his throat. “I need to go to the front desk to sort everything out, but now we both have a bed,” he says walking to put his shoes on.

Nanami is gone for twenty minutes, but it feels like an instant. You try to resume your nighttime routine while he is gone, but you keep getting distracted by your thoughts of that moment. Your flushed cheeks and his intense stare seared into your mind as if it were branded there with a hot iron.

When Nanami comes back into your room he silently packs his things to move into his own room. You observe him, being as still as you can, scared to move too quickly as if he will disappear like a stray cat. Once all his things are packed he stands tall in front of your seated position on the bed. His posture is impeccable, as he tells you his room number and how the hotel comped one of the rooms because of the inconvenience. As you look up at him his hot gaze is already on you, as if he were studying for an exam. You quietly respond with a soft ‘okay’ and ‘Good night’.

When you wake the next morning you feel calmer, more at ease than the prior night. You were so warm up last night that you took another shower just to try and calm your buzzing body and mind, not that it did much. Nanami was not much better, he was thankful to whatever deity granted him a room away from you. His thoughts were muddled and the clarity he was used to was gone. As he finally drifted to sleep he thought of how the atmosphere shifted in that instant before the phone call.

Nanami let you know he would meet you in the lobby around 8 to catch your 11 o’clock flight. As you leave for the airport you do a swift look over of the room to make sure you didn’t forget anything. The room felt so much more empty sans Nanami, his large frame taking up physical space, but his aura taking up infinitely more. His presence is warm and calm, much unlike your own anxious one.

The morning trip to the airport, as well as the airport itself, passes by in an instant. Now you sit at the gate waiting for your flight home; Nanami is on the hunt for coffee, as the hotel only had drip coffee. You are wasting time staring at the pages of a book you weren’t reading, too lost in thought. As a hand with a take-out coffee cup impedes your view and the smell of fresh pastry hits your nose.

“I got peach this time,” Nanami says with a small smile, handing you a bag along with your coffee. He is back in his jeans and sweater from last night, much as you are in the same outfit.

You take the coffee and bag and give thanks to the man now eating his own. The rest of the morning goes much like this, quiet and at ease. There is no tension between you, and you wonder if this is what it is like to date Nanami. Are all of his mornings quiet and tranquil?

Nanami drops you off at your apartment and, as the true gentleman he is, gets your stuff out to hand to you. As you walk away from him you can feel his warmth leave you. This trip was a whirlwind. Nanami is attractive and his personality is unmatched by anyone you’ve met, but he is a coworker now. Plus, he gave no indication that he is interested in you, outside of that moment. That moment could have been anything and he is hard to read so you chose to match his level of professionalism. At this point, the best you can do is friends, which is okay.

April 2014

So much has changed in the past two years after graduating high school. You’ve gotten to know yourself more, honed your fighting techniques, and become better friends with former classmates and coworkers. Soon after your mission with Nanami, you were promoted to a full-fledged grade one sorcerer, you gathered from Gojo that Nanami’s recommendation was glowing.

Currently, you are sitting opposite Gojo in a cafe as you both talk about your plans for your upcoming birthday. The lanky man sitting across from you suggested going all out, after all, you are now an actual adult who can drink. Your speed was more like a small group of people and dinner, not the rager Gojo was already planning. Try as you might Gojo is truly an unstoppable force, and his party planning is quickly getting away from you.

“Gojo, I am not having a massive party, my apartment is only large enough for a few people,” you sigh. “I’ll have dinner with a few friends, but nothing more,” you sternly say to the white-haired man.

“But that’s so boring, we did that last year,” he whined as if your birthday was supposed to entertain him.

Most of your afternoon went on like this because Gojo is, well, Gojo. On the bright side, he did pay for your coffee and treats. You have some paperwork to finish, but other than that you are free for the weekend. Gojo drops you off at your office muttering something about leaving it for Monday.

As you quickly work through the sparse papers on your desk you hear a firm knock, clearly Nanami. Gojo would just burst in and Shoko’s knocks are short and quiet. In the nearly two years you’ve known Nanami, and in that time he has become one of your closest friends. He is the one you go to new museum exhibits with and the one you try new cafes with after said museum outings.

“Come in,” you say, not looking up from the last form you needed to fill out. You sigh for a moment as Nanami’s footsteps enter your office.

“Hey, I saw you were still here and I wanted to see if you wanted to leave together,” Nanami says, looking down at you with a peacoat draped over his arm. “That is if you are almost done.”

“Oh, umm, yeah,” you say, still not looking at him. “I just need to sign off on this and submit it,” you say sighing as you stand to get your stuff. “Where were you wanting to go?” You ask, finally meeting his eyes.

“I was thinking of that new ramen place near yours,” He says holding his hand out to take your bag, “but I am up to suggestions.”

“Great, I just need to run by Yaga’s office to turn these in,” you say smiling at him as you turn off the lights and close your door.

The walk to Yaga’s office is the same as it always is, hallways blurring together. You are looking through the papers making sure everything is in order and Nanami is lost in his own mind. In the time Nanami has known you, you’ve nestled yourself into his life seamlessly. After that first mission in Osaka, the pair of you worked on a few more local missions until you were a full-fledged grade-one sorcerer. Even after that, you made a point to spend time with Nanami, to be his friend. That is something he admires about you, you put so much effort into everything you do; sometimes to your own detriment.

You have an aura to you that draws him in, something that makes Nanami want to know everything about you; not just the superficial things anyone can figure out, but the more intimate things like what your nighttime routine is and how you look when you first wake up. These things are small, but he wants them; he wants you in your entirety, mind, body, and soul.

Nanami came to these conclusions one night after drinking with you, Gojo, and Shoko. He initially turned down Gojo, but when you asked he couldn’t find it in him to decline when he looked into your bright, beautiful eyes. While going out is not his preferred way to spend a night, especially on a Thursday, he thought your presence made it bearable. Especially when you would join in on teasing Gojo with Shoko after a few drinks. After that night Nanami vowed to keep his feelings to himself because you didn’t deserve him, he is a broken man who cannot promise you tomorrow. In his mind, being your friend was better than not being in your life at all.

You were finally able to talk Gojo out of a big party at a club in exchange for dinner at your favorite place and a few drinks afterward. Music is loudly blaring from your phone as you get ready in the bathroom, hot water running over your figure. You think of what to wear, taking into consideration the temperature and the cute-to-comfy ratio of your outfit. When you step out of the shower, you go through your normal routine, taking more time on makeup and hair. Now you stand in front of your closet wondering what to wear. You could go with jeans and a sweater, but that’s what you wear when you normally go out; this is a special night, so maybe a little discomfort is okay. You pick out a short, light pink dress with poofy mesh sleeves and a flowy skirt. You also opt to put stockings with a criss-cross pattern on them under your dress. As you situate the stockings at the top of your thighs your phone dings and lights up.

‘Hey, I was thinking we could head over to the restaurant together so you don’t have to walk alone’ read the text from Nanami. It is not unusual for Nanami to pick you up to go somewhere, but it doesn’t happen as much as you’d like.

After that first mission with Nanami, you were thankful he seemed to want to be friends too, but never anything more. In the past two years, you’ve only grown to like the tall blonde more. He makes sure that you don’t overwork yourself, but rather that you get paid for the work you complete. When he can he also delivers coffee and a pastry. With every coffee delivery, you felt yourself fall a few more meters, you have yet to hit the ground.

You shoot a short ‘yes’ and go about finishing your look for the night. Thinking of Nanami makes you heat up, more than usual that is. There are a few reasons for this, but the main reason being you’ll look like you’re going on a date walking to the restaurant together. That thought alone made you squeal like a schoolgirl.

A curt knock rings through your apartment, signaling Nanami’s arrival, and pulling you out of your head. As you answer your door you notice Nanami has a gift bag in hand, presumably for you. You signal for him to come in and greet him, mentioning something about not being quite ready yet. Digging through your jewelry box for a necklace you ramble about your day to Nanami, who responds with grunts and nods, not that you could see him as he is in the living room.

Nanami fills you in on how his day has been as you walk side-by-side to the restaurant. He is self-conscious, something he has not been since high school, because you look amazing, and he just has a dark grey sweater on with nice pants. The dress is just short enough to see the upper parts of your thighs, but not so short that it is immodest. Nanami tries to not stare too much, but he really can’t given how well the stockings hug your things. The plush fat of them bludged slightly from the restriction from the stockings. This outfit is driving him insane– you are driving him insane. Just for a moment, Nanami allows him to wonder what it would be like to have you look this good for him, and him alone.

As you reach the restaurant you stop Nanami just shy of the entry, so as to not obscure the entry. He gives you a questioning look, and you just stare back at him with wide eyes. Words fail to escape your mouth as you look into his dreamy eyes. You try to start a sentence multiple times, but nothing ever reaches your mouth. Of course, he looks amazing, the sweater with the collar from a button down underneath. As you finally find the words to say Gojo begins yelling from down the block. You break away from the moment with Nanami and turn just in time for Gojo to pull you into a hug. Shoko is not far behind the lanky man as she holds two gifts, one hers and the other probably Gojo’s.

The host seats you all at a booth in the corner of the restaurant, and lights dim for the atmosphere. You slide into the space next to the wall and Nanami follows suit, sitting close to you at the smallish table. Gojo is directly across from you and Shoko is across from Nanami. Conversation flows, as do some drinks with dinner, and the food comes and goes. You feel a light buzz from the two drinks– one from Gojo and one from Shoko– as you prepare to pay your bill. The waiter comes back to divide up the bill and you all hand in your cards and discuss where to go next, as the drink portion is to appease Gojo.

The bar Gojo chooses has soft music playing and comfy sitting areas, the best for conversation. Nanami offers to get you a vodka cranberry, your drink of choice, while you find somewhere to sit. Shoko, being the woman she is, kept getting round after round of drinks. You are certain that you are mostly alcohol now, you cannot see straight and you didn’t want to try walking, in fear that your choice of platform boots will make you fall over.

Nanami can tell you are out of it, your eyes are not focused on anything in particular, and you are no longer talking in more than one-word answers. He closed out at the bar and told Gojo and Shoko he was taking you home, so as to not cause you more harm in the morning.

As you focus on Shoko complaining about some of the new changes to her duties from the higher ups you feel Nanami’s warm hand on your back. He looks down at you with concern, not that you can particularly tell right now. His deep voice is calming and rich, like the most decadent chocolate as he bids Gojo and Shoko goodbye. He makes sure you have everything, including the new mug from Gojo and the two wine glasses from Shoko.

When you step outside with Nanami still holding on to you the cool April air hits your face, causing you to shiver slightly. Nanami opts to hail a cab, mostly because he is not sure how far you can walk. As one pulls to the side Nanami puts you in the back and walks around to the other side for himself. You cling to him as soon as he sits, and you are not wanting to let go. He tells the driver your address and just lets you cling to him as if he is your lifeline.

This is nice, your hair smells just how it did when he first met you. Nanami once again lets himself think of what it would be like to have this all the time; you pressed against his body while you go to a shared home. He thinks back to what you were trying to say before dinner, before Gojo ruined it– typical.

The ride to your building is quick. Nanami pays and tips the driver and practically hoists you to stand. He can tell you are close to crashing, your body heavy, and your movements lethargic. At this point, he thinks about carrying you, as it may be easier than standing at an awkward angle holding you up, but decides against it so as to not cross any boundaries.

When he opens your door you struggle to take off your shoes and leave them in a pile on the floor, a problem for later you. You drunkenly stumble through your apartment with Nanami in tow as you try to undress. The zipper on the back of your dress seems infinitely further than when you zipped yourself into the dress. You break down and ask Nanami, who is standing outside as you change, to help you because you just want to go to bed. As he opens the door he sees you sitting on your bed swaying slightly. He unzips your dress and turns around to give you more privacy, but your perky butt and back are displayed in the full-length mirror he is now facing. You stand still for a minute, in your stockings and lacy pink panties with a matching bra before stumbling into the bathroom. A red-hot blush expands across Nanami’s face as he tries to not stare like a pervert, but there is something about how your ass looks in the lace panties that makes him insane.

Nanami leaves to sit on the couch, so as to not invade your space, trying to calm down from seeing you in such a state of undress, after all, he is just a man. For a third time tonight, he finds his mind wondering what it would be like to see you like this for him. What would it be like to undress you and feel how your soft body would squirm under his touch? What noises could he pull from you? How would you sound moaning his name? He shakes his thoughts away and busies himself with getting aspirin and water for you in hopes of getting rid of his little (massive) problem.

As you reemerge from the bathroom you have no more makeup on and are now in an oversized sweatshirt that reaches the tops of your thighs. You move to lie down and get comfy as Nanami has water and some aspirin in hand for you in the doorway. He gives you the pills first, then the water and you mutter a thanks while yawning. Making sure you don’t need anything more from him, Nanami heads for the door when he hears you, in such a soft voice, ask him to stay. In his tipsy state, he almost misses it, but not quite.

“What was that?” He asks, making sure his ears are in working order. His eyes intently search yours as you answer.

“Can you please stay with me?” you ask again, this time a little louder. “You don’t ha–” He cuts you off with a very quick acceptance and begins to make his way to the other side of your bed.

The next morning you wake up with a pounding headache and unbelievably dry throat. You reach for the water on your nightstand and gulp what’s left down in a hurry. Taking a breath, you take in your room, and the large man still asleep next to you. He shed his sweater and button down and is now in a form-fitting white undershirt. Sitting up next to this god among men you take a moment or two to admire Nanami’s form; his massive arms holding one of the cutesy stuffed animals you keep on your bed. Oh to be that stuffed cat.

You get up to get more water and scrounge something to eat from your sparse pantry as your memories trickle back. Your face heats up when you set the tea kettle on the stove as you remember practically begging poor Nanami to stay with you. Given, he wouldn’t have done something unless he wanted to, that much you knew. Does this mean he sees you in a romantic way? Or was this more of him wanting to make sure you don’t choke on your own vomit?

Nanami wakes up and quickly realizes he is not in his home, but rather your home. He also realizes you are not in bed with him, but your spot is still lukewarm. The smell of toast and tea wafts into the room as he sits up in bed. As he looks around he sees the stuffed animals strewn about the room, most likely his doing as he slept, as well as the cute white cat he currently holds. You consume his thoughts, millions of them racing in. Why did you ask him to stay? Why did he stay? Could this mean you wanted him too?

Sitting at your small table you have tea and toast, with a cup and plate on the counter waiting for Nanami. You have to talk about last night, but more so how you feel about the typically stoic man. There is no going back to before he slept in your bed, his warm body feeling like the missing puzzle piece in your life. He looked so peaceful sleeping with the sun peeking through the curtains of your room and landing on his sharp features.

Nanami walks into your main living space in his light blue boxers, looking like a Calvin Klein ad. You offer the tea and toast on the counter to the god of a man standing in your home. He takes the seat opposite yours and just looks at you. Your hair is pulled back with a clip with a few pieces near the front falling out, framing you in such a beautiful way. The sun softly shining into your home makes you look ethereal, your beauty outshining Aphrodite.

“I’m sorry,” you say as he takes a sip of the tea. “For last night that is,” you finish avoiding his eyes. You take a deep breath before continuing, “You should know, I like you,” another breath, “in a more than friendly way,” you say, feeling the sting of tears in the corners of your eyes. The weight of your words and emotions sit on you like a stone as you await Nanami’s rejection.

“Can you at least look at me when you tell me you love me?” Nanami asks with a small smirk on his pink lips. His eyes meet yours, which are full of sorrow.

“What,” you respond, taken by surprise at his comment. Your brow furrows as you ponder what he could mean. Your sorrow is replaced by confusion.

“For such a smart woman you’re quite dense, aren’t you?” He said still teasing you. “I want your mornings, afternoons, and evenings.” Nanami stands and moves to stand in front of you, his large body looming over you. “I want to be the man you look for in a crowded room, the one you get all dressed up for. I want you– all of you.”

You stare up at him, confused at his sudden burst of affection. His usual stoic demeanor was gone, now replaced by a soft expression on his sharp features. He holds your eyes, waiting for your response.

“Nan-” you stop yourself, now would be the time to use his first name, “Kento, I do look for you in every crowded room, you’re the one I want to give all of my time to.” You stand, still dwarfed by Kento’s massive frame.

Neither of you says anything for a moment, rather just processing what just happened. He leans closer to you and you meet him halfway, having to stand on your toes. The kiss is tentative as if you are both scared that this is some form of a cruel dream. Once your lips touch his everything feels at peace, you have no thoughts other than Kento and his soft lips on yours. As you pull away from the short, but sweet, kiss you both cannot stop the smiles that threaten to break your faces.

He goes in for another kiss, this time with more assurance and passion. His lips are hot and needy as his hands begin to roam your body. Kento’s kisses get more needy and his hands pull at you more and more. Large hands grab at your plush ass as he lifts you to his hips, instinctively, you wrap your legs around his muscular waist. You continue to make out while Kento carefully moves the both of you to your bedroom.

The next few weeks are filled with getting to know Kento in a deeper, more romantic way. As time passes with him you fall even deeper in love, as does he; the only difference now is that you are not scared to hit the ground because he’s there to catch you. You get to see him, who he is at his core, what makes him tick and it is a true honor. There are so many things that are uncertain in your life, but you know Kento will be a constant.

Kento does not believe in soulmates, there is no reason this cruel world would give people that luxury, but you are the closest thing to his. He never thought he would be allowed to have you in the ways he wanted you, but here you are in his arms. The Morning sun shines through his blinds causing you to snuggle closer to his chest. Kento debates getting up and making you breakfast, but decides against it in favor of holding your naked form against his own, just for a little longer.

August 2016

Kento finishes tying his bow tie and does a final look in the bathroom mirror before turning off the lights and leaving to find you. You are in the bedroom sitting at your vanity in a pretty white dress, something shorter because of the less-than-traditional wedding celebration. The dress has short sleeves with lace detailing at the ends that match the lace on the rest of the dress. You look up at Kento as you finish putting your makeup on and smile at your soon-to-be husband.

“The car is almost here darling,” Kento tells you, offering you a hand, a smile matching yours. “You look stunning,” He says, leaning down for a quick kiss.

“So do you my dear,” you say drinking him in, his white form-fitting shirt and light gray suit make you drool at the thought of taking it off of him later tonight. “Ready?”

“More than anything else,” Kento says, the smile still not leaving his perfect features.

The ceremony is short and intimate, just what you and Kento wanted. Nothing too extravagant, but still filled with love. After the ceremony, you and Kento go to a late lunch at your favorite restaurant and just enjoy the day as a married couple. You both sit in a cute little cafe with coffee and dessert. Every once and a while there is the soft clink on Kento’s mug from his ring, the one that matches yours. With each clink, your stomach does flips because you actually got to marry this man.

The rest of the evening is something out of an old film, the couple strolls through the city streets, lit by the moonlight and shop lights. Kento’s hand in yours, you talk about something while he looks like a lovesick puppy. He has an uncharacteristic soft smile across his features because of you. The walk back to your shared apartment is serene and feels right. Nights like this are what you live for, they are simple, but it’s the small moments that make you fall even more in love with Kento. The way he makes sure you have at least two meals a day that are nutritious or the way he makes you feel like you are the most important person in the world– because to him you are.

November 2017

Nights with Kento are quiet and beautiful. On this particular night you lie on his bare chest post-coitus as he strokes your hair gently. You fidget with his wedding band that matches yours, just content to be with him at this moment.

“Hey” Kento says in a soft voice to grab your attention, “how would you feel about having kids?” He asks, looking down at you. “Mine specifically” he clarifies.

“I would love to have your kids, but do you really think we’re ready?” you ask not knowing if you were ready for such a big change to your life. “I mean, we would need to get a bigger place and work seems to never stop.” You ramble on for a little about your anxieties of parenthood and Kento just looks at you with admiration.

“We have enough to buy a townhouse or condo if that is the biggest concern,” Kento says, softly petting your hair.

October 30th 2018

You are abruptly awoken by a loud cry from down the hall of your pristine townhouse. The noise is not foreign to you, as it once was, but more of a routine, a signal to get up and prepare to feed or change the small girl, Yukie, lying in her crib. Kento usually handles the random 3 AM cries, but he has been so worn out recently because he has been training another student, as per Gojo’s request. As you get out of the warm embrace of your husband he grunts and moves to his stomach.

Just a few doors from your own is your daughter’s, who is in the cutest pink and green flower onesie. You pull her from her crib and get situated to feed her in the comfy chair in the corner of the obscenely pink room— Kento’s doing. The monotony of feeding pulls you into your own thoughts now that your bundle of sunshine has quieted down.

Having a kid with Kento has made you want more because of the attentive husband he was during your pregnancy and how amazing of a father he is. He never complains about getting up in the middle of the night or having to do his errands with her strapped to his chest (seeing him in the baby bjorn for the first time almost made you jump him in the middle of the kitchen). Kento is truly the ideal man to have your children with because of his evercalm disposition, which you saw crack when he held your daughter for the first time in the harsh lighting in the hospital room.

In the morning you feel light and airy, as if you are floating a few centimeters off the ground as you are making eggs and toast. Kento and your daughter having tummy time in the living room; her bright laugh and babbles are followed by Kento’s soft chuckles and coos encouraging her. Mornings like this are the ones you live for, even if you are exhausted and have bags the size of checked luggage under your eyes. The quiet mundane life is all you need to feel complete, to feel at peace with yourself and the world.

Kento’s voice breaks through your thoughts, “Love, I have to work tomorrow night.” He says strapping your daughter into her high chair. “I know you had some cute costumes and plans for Yukie’s first Halloween, but this is unavoidable.” Disappointment evident in his voice as he runs his hand through his hair.

“Is everything okay?...” You trail off wondering what is so important that they would call Kento in when he’s supposed to work less because of his daughter. “I mean, I know there are more curses active around holidays, but do you really have to go in?”

“Yaga said almost everyone active is needed, not much else though.” He says looking at you while Yukie plays with his fingers. You can’t help but feel anxiety creep up in the back of your mind.

Thoughts are coming in from all over the place, what’s going on that Kento needs to work? Of course Kento is one of the best sorcerers, but is this a mission he needs to be on? What is going on?

The following evening you make a quick dinner so Kento has something on his stomach for what will probably be a long night ahead of him. As the rice noodles are finishing Kento walks into the room with his suit and tie on. He looks as good as the day you met him all those years ago. Kento gets two plates down with utensils and glasses for himself and you, as well as mashed peas and carrots for Yukie.

This domestic bliss will return after this mission, at least until the next year, when Kento needs to go back full time. Yukie is giggling as Kento is tickling her on the floor before getting her into her chair for dinner. He is her favorite person in the entire world, she will always reach for him when he comes home, drop everything the second he comes into her line of sight.

As you set the plates down on the small dining room table Kento comes with Yukie’s bib and food in hand. The rest of dinner is filled with babbles from Yukie and light conversation as you and Kento dance around the elephant in the room. Kento brings up wanting to take the last two weeks in December off to finally travel to Malaysia; which you fully agree with because you could both use a change in scenery.

Kento starts to gather his equipment and leave after Yukie is put down for bed. The house is silent, and you are stuck in your head again. It is highly improbable that Kento will get seriously injured or killed, but that is always a fear you have given your shared line of work.

“I should be home by tomorrow morning, dear.” Kento says, bringing you back to Earth in his calming smooth voice. He pulls you into his chest as he holds you close for a little while, planting kisses to the top of your head occasionally.

“Just come home to me Nanami Kento.” you say looking up at him with a small smile playing on the corners of your mouth.

“I love you.” He says before letting you go.

You fill the rest of your night trying to not stress over the mission Kento is on, but most of your attempts of trying to relax are futile. The one thing you find does help is propping up with your laptop in Yukies room with a small lamp giving off a soft yellow light and looking up Malaysia hotels and tickets to surprise Kento with when he gets home.

As the hour shifts to around 3 in the morning you feed Yukie one more time before heading to bed. Knowing Kento he will be upset if you screwed up your sleep schedule just for him. You quickly shower and change into a silk pajama set before lying down and falling into a dreamless slumber quickly.

You wake up around 9 to the sound of your doorbell ringing. Kento is still not home, but maybe he is getting ahead on his paperwork so he can spend the rest of his time with you and Yukie today. The house is cold, as you slip a robe on to answer the door. When you get down the bell rings again as you open the door to Ijichi, who is already fully bowed down.

“I’m very sorry to inform you…”

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callofdudes · 1 year ago

Text

Keegan P. Russ x Autistic Reader

A/n: Once again, I myself am not autistic, I'm just here to try and spread love to you guys through characters. If any of this is wrong you can feel free to let me know ♥️

Keegan had a small circle. He didn't people a whole lot but mentoring the new kids that somehow ended up under his wing kind of became his thing. Like the unethical uncle whose closer in age to you than your parents kinda thing.

So when he heard you'd be joining the team he knew you were damn good. They hadn't had someone join for a while considering how tight knit that were, under the radar and skilled.

So whoever you were, you were worthy and Keegan could recognize that. Even if he'd test for himself your limits on field.

When you first met him he wasn't exactly what you'd expected. The others looked somewhat presentable and there was... Keegan. 😂😅

You were nervous to impress them and didn't want to fail. You were given the opportunity to work with the ghost team. You didn't want to screw it up.

When you met him, those first few days were extremely anxiety inducing. Shaking his hand and struggling to keep your eyes in one place.

"Eyes on me soldier."

"Sorry sir." You whispered, looking up at him briefly before your eyes darted away somewhere else again.

"Have trouble with eye contact soldier?"

"Yes sir... Sorry."

"That's fine. Just address me respectfully. We'll work on the eye contact."

You nod a little, following after him while Logan and Hesh follow after.

It didn't take too long. He eventually got his hands on your proper file instead of word of mouth and got to reading. This is where he discovered you are autistic.

Ah, so that explained eye contact. He doesn't know a lot about autism. He knows it makes a person neurologically different from others. But that was about it.

He just shrugged and went along with it, figuring he could learn from watching you. Since staying in the background and watching was his thing.

He watched you attempt to socialize with the others. They were all relatively quiet, all except for Hesh and Logan, who were riding the excitement of a new member.

They were a family and happy to welcome you and your skills in.

Over time Keegan got to noticing little things about you. How you flinched and at louder noises and your nose scrunched whenever you accidentally touched something you didn't like.

Especially the masks that they had for you guys to optionally wear. They were scratchy and tight and just didn't feel the best. Immediately turning down the offer to wear it.

Keegan noticed how you are your food, what you would refuse and what you'd eat. Your little organized piles, as well as with your new room.

Huh, autism definitely had its perks. That what he thought at first. One mission where you were forced to wear the mask for clearance purposes changed that.

You were stuck in this tight, itchy thing. It made your face too hot and pulled at your cheeks. You kept tugging it and trying to move it, scrunching up when it rubbed on your skin.

"Keep up kid." Keegan called behind him as he walked further along the old road. Your feet picked back up, silently following while trying to just get over the feeling of the mask.

Everything was going good, the air was quiet, the enemies were still. The ghost team doing what it did best.

Until the stress, the mask, the smell of the air through the fabric, and something inside you all too familiar snapped.

You dropped your gun at your hilt, immediately clawing at the thing desperately. Keegan whipped around, gun aimed until he saw it.

"Kid- kid, easy." He went over, attempting to pull your hands away but tears filled your eyes. "Get it off- get it off! Get it off!" You choked, voice cutting into nothing.

"You need to keep it on, it's fine."

You sobbed, finally pulling the edge, trying to rip it off your face, so Keegan stepped in. Pushing your back against the wall, his knee pressing into you as he gently pulled the mask off, letting you breathe.

Your back against the wall was grounding, breathing in air, rubbing your sweaty face of the afterfeeling. "Easy... Keep your head in the game, kid."

After that Keegan decided to do some more digging. He hadn't seen you looked so panicked.

That's where he learned about your sensitivity to different things and how textured, tastes, smells, touch, all can be affected.

And he felt that protectiveness. He didn't have to, but he went to the main office and got a different mask approved. It was a smoother, almost silk texture. Not too heavy, and it was loose. Next mission he gave it to you.

"Kid, try this." He tossed you the mask and in a last second you caught it, looking at it. "For me?" You looked back up at him.

"Keep your helmet on straight, you should be fine." He grabs his gun, nodding. "Wanna help you do your job right, right?"

You smiled softly. "Right."

From that point on Keegan pretty much adopted you. You were a good fighter, sometimes getting overwhelmed. When you were alone down in the compound with the others in the building, he was there.

"Keegan..."

"Talk to me kid, what do ya need?"

"I don't know what to do..." Your breathing was picking up as you looked at all the corners and empty fields.

Keegan nodded, grabbing the monitor. "Alright, couple feet in front of you, then you'll make a left. Should be two guys at the end of that wall. Take them down."

Keegan walked you through. It became habit to help you through when you needed it or felt unsure and overwhelmed.

And if anyone attempted to bully you or point it out? I pray for their soul, because God is the last thing they'll be talking to after that.

Keegan is pretty protective of you, and overtime You've grown closer to you. You opened up about your life with autism over drinks one evening. Telling him about the good and the bad.

Keegan wasn't the hugest talker, so he listened. Eyes on you, he tipped his drink to his mouth as you talked about autism. And then slowly throughout telling some of your life story you dragged onto topics of your favorite game characters or action figures. Iconic music people you liked or movies. And Keegan listened with interest.

You two talked until the bar closed and Keegan covered the tab, escorting you out the door.

"Keegan." You touched his arm.

He turned before getting in the car, looking at you. "Yeah?"

"Thanks. People usually say I'm annoying... You listened though."

Keegan hummed. "Always listening kid. Always."

You chuckled and rolled your eyes playfully. You got in the car and the two of you headed home.

After a nightmare of the battlefield, you would usually just hide. Your weight blanket under your bed usually worked. Your other squadmates hated you and you first started having nightmares around them.

But this time, breathing heavy, tears in your eyes, you found yourself at Keegan's door.

Keegan grumbled as he unlocked it and looked at you. "Kid... Y'ok?"

You shake your head, trembling. "Can I... Stay with you?"

There was a tense moment. Keegan didn't let many people into his room, or his bed, for any reason on that matter. But something tugged on that heart of his buried somewhere in there.

"Come in. Get comfy as you need."

You nodded gratefully and came over. Keegan let you lay down, smelling the familiar smell of Keegan on the sheets. Seeing his room for the first time. If was dark, there weren't any vibrant colors or patterns so it wasn't as much to look at.

But sometimes that's nice.

Keegan sat in the chair by his desk, looking at you, watching you get all situated in bed.

"Keegan can..." You sniffed. "Can you lay on top of me?"

He frowned. "What for?"

"Just... Please, it's complicated."

Keegan could see in your eyes you weren't pulling his leg so he did. Crawling into bed, making sure you were comfy on your back before slotting himself on top of you, arms wrapped around you a little, head settling.

"This ok?"

You wrapped your arms around him tightly. "Yes, thank you." You whispered. And within 20 minutes you were back asleep. With a warm, known body against yours.

Keegan has got your back. It's something you've slowly come to realize over time. Whether it be helping with food, environment, being a giant human weight blanket, talking you through missions, letting you ramble about anything you'd like.

You found yourself smiling with this family. Getting a chuckle out of him as you rambled on and on about things you wanted so desperately to talk about. Stuff someone was willing to hear.

This was a place that made you feel safe, a person you felt safe with.

Keegan could probably do some more research, and he promises he will find the time for it, but for now, he will learn alongside you as you grow more and more into an even better soldier.

#call of duty #call of duty ghosts #keegan p russ #keegan russ #keegan p russ x reader #keegan p russ x you #keegan p russ x autistic reader #autistic reader #call of duty ghosts headcanons #keegan p russ headcanons #keegan russ headcanons

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20dollarlolita · 9 months ago

Note

Heyy, I know this isn't really your thing, but do you think it would be bad for someone to get a wheelchair to cosplay at a convention, when they're not disabled? I know you go to cons in a chair.

That's a kind of complicated question.

So for starters, obviously there's not one person who can speak for every wheelchair user, so don't take my word as law or anything.

But the short answer is maybe? Probably?

First of all, if you want to learn how noodle arm your abled noodle arms are (and yes, you have abled noodle arms. Manual wheelchair users have arm muscles you've never heard about), try to propel yourself through a con for an entire day.

But to answer the question, first of all, it's not okay for someone who's using a wheelchair for a cosplay to take up limited resources that are intended for disabled people. If there's limited wheelchair seating at a panel, you better not be taking it up. You can get out of your wheelchair and sit, and you can't tell if another wheelchair user is able to safely and comfortably do it. If you're worried about people judging you for using a wheelchair and then standing up and walking, welcome to the reality that a lot of ambulatory wheelchair users, who can stand or walk, live all the time. Remember what that judgement feels like and make a note to never, ever pass it onto another person. Don't be using the wheelchair for cutting in lines or things like that. If there's a line for the elevator or the big bathroom stall, let other people go ahead of you.

But, I don't think it's inherently bad for someone to want to use a wheelchair at a convention, even if they wouldn't be using one outside a con, provided that they do not use resources intended for disabled people. I think that management of a convention seeing that there are more wheelchair users will be more likely to take into consideration wheelchair accommodations. I think that people who are using a wheelchair in public for the first time will learn very fast about how accessible their convention center actually is. There's a lot of things that I didn't realize were accessibility problems until they were problems that directly challenged my personal access. A lot of those things would cost zero dollars to change, but the people in charge either don't have the experience needed to know that they need to be changed, or they don't think it's a priority because wheelchair users are in the minority. Having more people aware of those kinds of situations is going to make a bigger pressure to stop those things from happening. For example, when was the last time that you noticed an a bathroom stall labeled accessible that had a door that opened inward? Most people I know wouldn't consider that a problem, but everyone who's been unable to pee because the stall isn't big enough for the door and their wheelchair is going to notice. The places I've been where moving the line over 5" to the left would make an inaccessible line able to accommodate my wheelchair (looking at you, Halloween Horror Nights). There's been "oh we have a ramp" and it's two 2x4's. There's all kinds of little things that cost no money that can be better, but no one cares until it's about them. You can get that perspective. You can learn how garbage it can feel.

I also don't want to ignore the fact that we frequently use cosplay to test out things that we want to do in our real lives. A lot of my friends who wear alternative fashion daily started out just wearing alternative fashion to conventions. Everyone my age or younger either a) has a friend that started out cosplaying characters of a different gender and then they later came out as that gender, or b) is that friend, or c) says weird transphobic BS all the time and so trans people don't want to be their friends. Deciding that you need to use a mobility aid is a really weirdly hard decision. I actually had a long period of time between "I need a mobility aid," and "it's okay if I use a mobility aid." I'm going to assume that there's people out there who are trying to decide if it's helpful and okay to use a wheelchair, who test it out by cosplaying a character in a wheelchair and seeing how they feel about it when it's part of a costume. I don't want to deny someone a chance to learn that it's okay to get a wheelchair and will help them.

But yeah, the short version is if your enjoyment of a convention using a wheelchair for a costume comes at the expense of the accessibility and experience of people who are disabled and don't have a choice about if they're going to be using mobility aids, you're a piece of garbage.

But I haven't actually been wearing cosplay to cons for a while (though I did cosplay Barbara Gordon at the last SacAnime) so if anyone in the disabled cosplay community has something to say about this, I'd appreciate the input. Like I said, no one can speak for everyone in this subject.

#pink's controversial opinions #20dollarlolita on wheels #not lolita

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1mlostnow · 4 months ago

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A young man stands in his bedroom. It just so happens that today, the 27th of July, is this young man's birthday. Though it was years ago he was given life, it is only today that he will be given a name.

What will the name of this young man be?

•

🐸 The Basics :

Name : Evan

Pronouns : He/Him

Age : A minor!!

Gender : Male

Sexuality : Gay

Nationality : American

Star Sign : Leo

MBTI : INTJ-T

I love nicknames, call me whatever.

I’m usually around from 8AM to 1AM CDT.

Music sideblog : @evan-radio

🐛 My Resume :

Loser CEO, the ‘weird kid’ since birth, Professional Ghostbuster, Supervillian, and Midwestern Cowboy (the fun way, not the cop way), Lab Experiment #0727

🪲 My Music :

AJJ, boygenius, Bug Hunter, Cage The Elephant, Car Seat Headrest, Crywank, Lemon Demon, Lord Huron, Los Campesinos!, MCR, Noah Kahan, ODO, Pat The Bunny, Radiohead, Rex Orange County, Seb Lowe, Sleep Token, Tally Hall, Tame Impala, Teen Suicide, TFB, The Smiths, Vundabar, Weezer :/, Will Wood/WWATT, Wingnut Dishwashers Union, and more.

🐢 Tags :

# evan speaks -> I talk. A lot. // # evan rants -> I tend to be very emotional // # evan’s memories -> nostalgia mode // # evan can’t vote -> US politics // # evan draws -> my art // # EvanRadio -> my sideblog for music // # i love my mutuals -> typically multiple mutual appreciation posts per day

🐍 Rules & Boundaries :

I’m a minor!! Don’t be weird!!

Obviously, any form of discrimination is off limits.

Cringe culture is dead, all are welcome, and I’m always open to learning.

Asks and anons are open, notifs are off so feel free to spam, but I can’t promise I’ll see it right away. Absolutely feel free to interact and ask, I will have full convos w/ you through reblogs. I answer DMs on a case-by-case basis. If you are over 18, please do not DM me.

🦎 Fandoms and characters ->

★ Dead Poets Society

★ House MD

★ Supernatural

★ Sherlock

★ Ghostbusters

★ Homestuck

🦖 Incoming fandoms ->

★ Hannibal, Good Omens, Saw

🐊 Backseat Fandoms ->

★ IT, Stranger Things, Over The Garden Wall, Scooby-Doo

🦚 Fandom Graveyard ->

★ Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Creepypasta

🦜 Kinnies ->

★ Sherlock Holmes (Sherlock)

★ Egon Spengler (Ghostbusters)

★ Castiel (Supernatural)

★ Steven Meeks (Dead Poets Society)

★ Richie Tozier (IT 2017)

★ Rory Keaner (My Babysitter’s A Vampire)

🪛 Other Movies :

The Truman Show, Stand By Me, Velvet Goldmine, Jaws, The Goonies, Breakfast Club

🐉 Other Interests :

Reading, writing, art (drawing, painting, digital and traditional), etymology, science, history, math, forensics, biology, marching band (alto sax), sharks

🔋 Other Facts :

- I love my car like it’s my child #TOMATER SUPREMACY 🦚

- Richard Cameron Defender for life (see here)🐊

- Blog theme changes frequently 🦖

- i LOVE doing little doodles and drawings of my friends 🐢

- I love my mutuals and you guys are my best friends btw 🐍

- More mouse bites!! This vexes me! Medicine drug!! 🦎

- ADHD 🪲

- I’ve got a bad habit of viewing notifications but never responding to them, if this happens please just tag me again 📗

🦠 A Note :

I am very indecisive and this post will be edited very often (see counter below)

🧪 Dead Poets Society :

@pingunaa @ghostboyhood @wordssricochet @meekspeaks @poetsinnyc @wilsons-three-legged-siamese @midwest-quill @apparitiongnostic @de4d-poet-kisser @yourfavvgal @asclexe @lv3buzzz

If I forgot someone/if you want to be added just lmk :)) if I forgot you I’m so so sorry

Edited - |||| ||

#introduction #intro post #dead poets society #homestuck #supernatural #bbc sherlock #ghostbusters #house md #good omens #saw #hannibal #evan speaks

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formerly-wraith-caller · 1 year ago

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Fia's ending is not the restoration of a natural death : a theory

There are plenty of confusing things going on in the Elden Ring lore. Given that we learn it piecemeal through dialog, cut scenes,, and various item descriptions, it's understandable that we don't all end up with the same interpretation of what's happening. One thing I frequently see is the claim that Fia's ending, "The Age of the Duskborn", is a return of the balance of life and death to the Lands Between. I strongly disagree that this is what is being communicated by her ending, and would like to posit the opposite. It is the insertion of an alternative yet equally unnatural lifecycle, one of death unending.

🚨Spoilers Ahead🚨

So we can all agree on this much: Fia is allied with Those Who Live in Death. Per her dialog:

"I wished to be a mother to Those Who Live in Death. So it is that any loathing, any hatred that overshadows them, I must bear, as a matter of duty, with my own flesh."

"I am the guardian of Those Who Live in Death."

Her goal is to uplift TWLID from what she feels is persecution, and to lay with Godwyn and give him another life:

"We, who humbly live in Death live in waiting to one day welcome our Lord. What right does anyone have to object? Our Lord will rise, the Lord of the many and the meek."

"With [the cursemark], Godwyn can take his rightful place as First of the Dead, and claim a second, illustrious life."

"The new life of the golden prince, and first Dead of the demigods, as the rune of Those Who Live in Death. Please, do one thing for me. Brandish this child, my rune, and take for yourself the throne. Stay the persecution of Those Who Live in Death by becoming our Elden Lord."

What are Those Who Live in Death? Per the Skeletal Militiamen Ashes:

"These are the spirits of militiamen who live in Death, and will continue to rise again until properly finished off. This is the grotesque fate of those who come into contact with deathroot."

So we can take a few pertinent bits of information from this. Becoming one of TWLID is likely often involuntary. Corpses buried in the ground aren't going out huntiing for deathroot to rub up on, after all, and we know that the deathroot spread through the lands by infecting the Erdtree after Godwyn's half-death. I won't rule out the possibility that there are living people who voluntarily choose to become TWLID, but given that the majority (if not all) of the undead we encounter are at an advanced stage of decomposition, we can assume that's not terribly common. This is relevant because the nature of TWLID is a point of contention between Darian, Fia, and Rogier.

Darian describes TWLID in no uncertain terms as a blight upon the world:

"Those Who Live in Death fall outside the principles of the Golden Order. Their mere existenece sullies the guidance of gold, tainting its truth. And so it is the vermin must be exterminated, down to the very last."

They run counter to the tenets of the Golden Order. Death was sealed from the Lands Between, and souls of the dead are intended to return to the Erdtree. It's also worth noting that, well, TWLID aren't exactly a friendly bunch. The Skeletal Militiamen Ashes refer to their fate as "grotesque" for a reason, and they don't limit their aggression to the player character. We first encounter Darian apologizing to the body of a person killed by TWLID for being unable to give them their "proper rites".

Fia describes TWLID as "meek", yet their acts seem anything but. Darian describes them as vermin, yet the undead have no control over their fate. Interestingly, Rogier does not clearly throw his lot in with either of these ends of the spectrum, and claims to want to "save them". While it would seem that he feels the best way to do this involves working with Fia somehow, it's less clear what it means to him to save TWLID. He doesn't mention Fia (though she mentions him, making it plain they trade information), so it's harder to understand his motivations. It's tempting to think he wants to save the dead by integrating life within death the way Fia does, but I'd like to suggest an alternative: he wants to put them to a real, proper death. He is the midpoint between the extreme alternatives offered by D and Fia, extermination or prolilferation.

Rogier gives a little insight into what motivates him when he says:

"I've spent many an hour scouring the archives for knowledge of that fateful plot. The world has grown crooked, and if you intend to put it to rights, you'd better understand what happened to make it that way, hm?"

He isn't talking cursemarks and new overlords here, he is talking about understanding what broke everything to begin with. We don't hear talk about the might of the Golden Order(though he does spare it a little admiration in spite of his apparent heretical ties), nor about uplifting the meek undead, nor any reverence for the Prince of Death. In fact, Rogier refers to Godwyn's corpse as "that thing", hardly in line with the sort of respect Fia holds for Godwyn. In order to save the dead, he knows he first has to work out why they exist to begin with. He tells us that if he could inspect Ranni's cursemark, he will "have the answers [he has] sought for so long."

Of course we get a bit more of an explanation for Rogier's interests when we ask him why he wants the cursemark. He tells of us his desire to save TWLID, explaining that in his research he has discovered something of their nature. Again, I think this relates to the fact that TWLID didn't intentionally become what they are, coming into being by random chance through no fault of their own.

"These souls have committed no offense. They have every right to life, only, they happened to touch upon a flaw in the Order."

It's hard for me to decide what he means by this. The SOULS have committed no offense, but TWLID are what they are because they are bodies persisting without the soul. They have a right to life, but does this mean life within death? Or does it mean a proper death, so that they may be given back the life stolen from them when their souls couldn't be returned to the Erdtree due to their affliction as one of TWLID? Something pointed out to me by elden_things is that, in the original Japanese version of this part of his dialog, he says:

"They violated nothing. They only lived in earnest, and thus, they came in contact the law's flaw."

"They only lived in earnest" is A LOT different than "They have every right to life". One is simply understanding that TWLID are not necessarily malicious fiends but an unfortunate accidental byproduct of Godwyn's death, the other more explicitly sympathetic. Taking the Japanese version could lend more credence to the idea that Rogier is not necessarily advocating for the integration of life within death into the Order. He understands that the Order needs repaired, that it is broken, but also that it is able to adapt:

"In the past, [the Academy of Raya Lucaria] obeyed laws which contravened the Golden Order, or so I'm told. Fascinating, isn't it? That the Golden Order was pliable enough to absorb practices that contradicted itself in the past. With the Order broken, twisted, and in need of repair, such adaptability is more important now than ever."

Interestingly, Rogier doesn't ever deride the Golden Order the way Fia does (referring to them as "dogmatic brutes" seeking to deny Godwyn's ascension and, well, murdering Darian). He actually appears to admire its ability to change with the needs of the current age, and he doesn't talk about upending it or tearing it down, but repairing it. He feels this can be achieved by understanding the things that broke it to begin with. He must understand why TWLID exist, and to do that he must understand deathroot, and to do that, he must understand the nature of Godwyn's death, and to do that he must understand the cursemarks, and so on until we get to the knifeprint and the Night of the Black Knives itself, the genesis of the Shattering and the origin of TWLID. This is how ends up pointing us towards Ranni's cursemark, rather than Godwyn's. It's unclear if he knows Darian had the latter, but I personally assume he didn't, and that this is why he went to inspect the corpse beneath Stormveil. He wanted the cursemark for his research, and Darian knew better than to let anyone know what he had, especially Rogier who he would know was working alongside Fia at this point.

Returning to Fia's ending. Her story culminates in her fashioning the Mending Rune of the Death Prince. Right away its description can cause some confusion:

"Formed of the two hallowbrand half-wheels combined, it will embed the principle of life within Death into Order. The Golden Order was created by confining Destined Death. Thus, this new Order will be one of Death restored."

It's understandable to see the phrase "Death restored" and assume this means that people will be able to die naturally again whereas before they couldn't, both due to Marika's removal of the Rune of Death, and because of the curse of the deathroot causing TWLID. But let's back up to the first half of that item description: "it will embed the principle of life within Death into Order". So which is it? A restoration of real death, or the integration of the living dead into the Order of the world?

Reviewing Fia's dialog would strongly indicate the latter. She states she wants to be like a mother to them, a guardian, to bear the scorn they receive. She wants Godwyn to have a new, "illustrious" second life, calls for his rise as the Lord of the meek and many undead. If it were merely a matter of his second life as the mending rune putting the living dead to rest, how is that significantly different from what the Golden Order is doing with its hunters? Why oppose them instead of joining them in their quest to end TWLID if you both seek to give rest to the dead? The Order wants to "eradicate" them, but we see what this means in practice when we fight a Mariner alongside Darian: sanctifying the undead so they can't rise again, and weeding deathroot so more can't be made. In what way is this not being put to rest? Beyond that, what would Godwyn/the rune be lord of if his meek and many are dead and buried? What persecution needs to be stayed if there are no undead to receive mistreatment?

Then there's the actual cut scene from the Age of the Duskborn ending. Everything in grey shades and shrouded in mist, the light of the Erdtree dimmed, and most worthy of note, the swarms of flies at our Tarnished's feet. We've seen these flies before in the Deeproot Depths before Godwyn's body, as well as on Rogier when he's dying of deathblight. The flies are very heavily connected with deathroot and TWLID, another indication that this is not an ending of a peaceful and natural death, but the inclusion of the living dead in the world order. These same living dead who we have already established are unlikely to have chosen this fate for themselves. Is it really a mercy to be left to what the game itself refers to as a "grotesque" fate, one which you have no control over and don't choose for yourself?

A final nail in the "this is a return of true death" coffin for me is the simple fact that there already is a rune for giving people natural deaths. It's the Rune of Death, the same one the player can obtain from Maliketh. If Fia's intention was simply to give a peaceful death to people in a world plagued by the immortality given to it by Marika, wouldn't it be more sensible to seek this rune instead of fashioning a new one altogether, one that it kills her to create? (I know people believe Devin killed her, but I'm pretty confident she's already dead. She gives us a farewell before laying with Godwyn to create the rune, and talks to us like she won't be there when she asks us to take the rune, and the other two NPCs who fashion mending runes die in the process as well.)

If you've made it this far, feel free to share your thoughts. It's always interesting to read new perspectives, and I'm sure there are things I've missed or even totally misunderstood. There's a huge amount of information tucked away in this game and it's very exciting to learn something more about it.

#elden ring #elden ring meta #those who live in death #age of the duskborn #elden ring spoilers #fia #fia deathbed companion #sorcerer rogier #d hunter of the dead #godwyn the golden

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pixieperson19 · 5 months ago

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blog masterpost!

(bc I repost a lot of stuff)

Welcome!!

my name is Pixie (they/them), I post artwork/comics/silly posts/tutorials

I post about tmnt, rottmnt, Sonic, and other cartoons!

I AM A MINOR!

my asks are open! pls use them if you’d like, and you can always recommend drawing or writing prompts, in fact- I encourage droppin drawing prompts for me :DDD

things I do not support (DNI)

-racism/sexism/anti-semitism (discrimination or hate of any kind)

-maps

-zoophiles

-neo-nazis

-incest

-TERFs

-anyone who is anti anything that/whom this is a safe space for

this is a safe place for:

-age/pet regressors! (Im an age-regressor myself actually!)

-people with disabilities (physical or mental or both! no hate here!)

-mental health (this is a safe space for anyone struggling with mental health, I support you!)

-systems (I do my best to understand and learn about DID/OSDD, but I'm not perfect!)

-LGBTQ+ (I'm here and I'm queer!)

-POC (I'm white and unfortunately have some ingrained stereotypes in me that I'm trying my hardest to get rid of, I'm sorry in advance, however this blog will always be a safe space for anyone regardless of race, I judge by personality and values, not appearance and identity.)

-beginners! beginners of any kind (such as new artists, musicians, creators, etc!) are always welcome and supported here!

-religion (as long as you're not hateful and aren't pushing your beliefs on anyone, any and all religions are welcome here!)

-furries! (I, myself, have a fursona)

-therians/alterhumans (similar to my knowledge with systems, I do my best to learn, but I'm not an expert)

-"cringe" people (I support anyone and everyone (who isn't on my DNI list), whether you make kandi, cosplay, are a gacha kid, or are/participate in other stereotypical "cringe" things, you're always welcome here!)

-alternative views/tastes/style (goths, emos, scene people and all the above welcome!)

links to my posts below ⬇️

the golden guard fanart (draw w me!)

Viktor Arcane (S2 SPOILERS)

2012 "raised by Shredder" au

inspirational quote (photography)

spidersona sketch

silly reblog chain!

WYJEMP fanfic planning sheet

rottmnt goretober day 2

Mabel doodle to get out of art block😣

Dipper w allergies doodle

ask to irestuff (yall should support their shop and art its super cool!)

daily clicks reminder & link!

TMNTember Day 3

TMNTember Day 2

TMNTember Day 1

silly ask to claws and paws

discord server promo!

rottmnt au storyboard

breakfast text post

Lunar’s agere ally button (not made by me, but important to my blog)

fanart of hatekawa’s 3 months AU

Poll

Allergy Text Post

Yaelokre fanart

TMNT 40th Anniversary comic

2012 tmnt fanfic fanart

Sonic fanfic fanart

25 reblogs!

au rottmnt comic

au sort of vid rottmnt movie

womp womp

Limited Space rottmnt au

Sonic and Tails

Lunar’s DTYIS

Hey Sunshine text post

Tails

Mystic Mikey

tmnt comic

rottmnt new years

poll

original character

arcane text post

shooketh text post

mm Leo and Amphibia Anne text add-on post

how to add images into ao3 tut

rottmnt Mikey ballet

Amphibia artdump

The Owl House artdump

Kraang Prime drawing

TOH Flapjack tattoo post

TOH skill issue

ROTTMNT turtles

Marcy Wu - Amphibia

#digital art #rottmnt #tmnt #fanart #sonic the hedgehog #miles tails prower #masterpost #pixieperson19 #safe space #ao3 #tmnt 2012 #2k12 tmnt #rise of the teenage mutant ninja turtles #lgbtq safe space

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macklemorrigan · 4 days ago

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initial veilguard thoughts under cut

biiiiiig momma SPOILERS

it's complicated!!!!

the thing is, i enjoyed myself playing it, ya know? i had fun discovering the world of northern thedas. seeing tevinter, rivain, antiva. i enjoyed getting to experience a different side of thedas than we have the last three games.

ill need another playthrough to fully get it, i feel like i need to make different choices to see just how much choice matters in this game. i feel like i got the "good" ending with relative ease.

this game felt like it was holding my hand through it, trying to warn me that i'm about to have to make a choice. a choice? in a dragon age game? well will there be consequences?? will you tell me explicitly what those consequences will be so i don't accidentally make the wrong choice in this role playing game where i'm roleplaying a character? like i get it... but running in blind and discovering the outcomes is half the fun.

i like rook. voiced protags always have a sort of "them"-ness that has to underlie everything regardless of dialogue choices. i think rook suffers that more than other protags in the series, but like i said, i like them, so that was fine for me.

hated the varric twist. hated it. hated it down. varric was mostly nothing the whole game anyway. unless i missed something major, he only had like a couple cut scenes. he felt ornery anyway, so idon't feel like the twist is justified by some big role he played in rook's story. very clearly they were relying on the players already existing love for the character. which works on me a little!!!!!!!! in the moment!!!!!!! but ill cry to almost anything with a moving musical motif transfixed behind it. might have been an interesting twist if he turned out to be a spirit that watched varric and took his shape or something. i don't know, man... just - anything - other than the "and he was dead the whole time" dead horse.

combat in a dragon age game fun confirmed????? that being said, it got boring after a while and as usual some fights overstay their welcome. also a two companion party???? when so much approval is dependent on bringing them with you, and with party composition being as important as it is in higher level difficulties, that was a bummer. i enjoyed the difficulty of combat but i felt like i couldn't keep it high or else i would lose out on content with companions.

speaking of companions, i liked them for the most part! unfortunately a lot of them felt 1 note as did a lot of their content. i didn't feel like i learned very much about them outside of what the moral of their story was supposed to be.

character quests... i liked hardings, i liked davrins, i liked emmerichs and that's it. i wanted to like bellara's, i felt like there was so much potential. how is a storyline about a forgotten one boring???

i saved minrathous so lucanis was hardened. ill have to do another playthrough, but i feel like i missed out on a lot of lucanis' character because of that, which i don't like. i don't mind if it affects the characters relationship to me (ability limitations, character approval penalty, cuts off romance option), but i got no bonding scenes with him, no interactions with spite. i had to drag his speeding ass along every adventure just to keep his approval up, and even then, at the end of the game i still feel like i barely knew the guy. i never got the chance!

i have more thoughts but this actually got more negative than i wanted so im gonna stop. like i said, i had fun. i hope if anything it breathes new life into the fandom and franchise. i will enjoy making rook and co content soooo much i know it im just waiting for my tablet to charge so i can share her with you. okay thanks if you read this far bye

#datv spoilers #da4 spoilers #dragon age critical #bioware critial

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shiurkoma · 8 days ago

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Blog Intro (read carefully before scrolling or subbing)

中文请往下翻

I'm dedicating this blog to the tanakh and talmud fandom. If you're here for my works of other fandoms and want to see more of that please go to @shiurkomaalt, i will put my future works there. I like angst, messed up things and doing character designs. I also love to torture my OCs. I might open an OC blog in the future.

What i mainly like within tanakh/talmud:

- Yehonatan/David

- most of the Bereshit cast

- The story of the four who entered the pardes

- Elisha Ben-Avuyah's many shinanigans and his colleagues. I got hooked after reading "as a driven leaf" but i don't stick to that depiction with fanarts

I haven't posted any talmud fanarts yet, or enough tanakh fanart for that matter. There's very little content right now so I'm mainly planning the content for this blog here. I'm busy studying so i don't think these content will come out anytime soon either. I will not post very often in general.

I learn about tanakh and talmud for purely recreational purposes. I make a lot of headcanons, but i limit myself to only make them based on stuff that i already researched on and have a basic level of understanding about. If you are proficient in torah or talmud studies you are welcome educate me.

⚠️Before you start scrolling:

This is my hobby and non of my works pose as serious interpretations of the original literature, all interpretation or conspiracy theory belongs in the "headcanon" category. From now on i will only tag my work with tags such as "the bible fandom" instead of "the bible" or "tanakh".

Please note, I interpret these stories through an agnostic lens and i play around with the characters like I would characters of any other fandom. So if you are religious this is probably not for you. I like gore, i like to make headcanons and most importantly i like shipping characters together. Seriously, nothing is holy here, for the sake of your sanity think twice before you decide to scroll down or sub.

My content is not suited for anyone under the age of 18. Not only because of the topics i like to explore are grim, but also because there will be NSFW content at some point.

What you will probably see on this blog:

- exaggerated character designs of tanakhic/talmudic figures. Not as exaggerated as the fate series but it won't be very historically accurate either

- headcanons, conspiracy theories and personal depictions that are most likely gonna be very far from usual depictions and academic/ religious consensus

- shipping

- occasional silly doodles

- comics if i am extra energetic and free

- reposts of the same topic

What you will not see on this blog:

- serious claims about the original literature coming from me.

- Attack on any religion or faith. Additionally, any bias, if depicted, remains solely within the context of the story and do not extend to my personal belief or opinion irl. This includes but is not limited to sexism, xenophobia and homophobia that could exist within the historical and cultural context.

- anything political. This blog is strictly for recreational purposes only and will not concern itself with real life politics and events.

If you still decide to continue, it means you are fine with everything i said above. Enjoy 😊

博客介绍（继续翻或关注前请仔细阅读）

哈喽

这个博客用于上传塔纳赫和塔木德同人（希伯来神话）。如果你想看我其他饭圈的同人请移步@shiurkomaalt。我喜欢搞各种刀片和人设立绘。我还喜欢折磨我的oc。以后可能会另开一个oc博客。

塔纳赫/塔木德我主要喜欢的内容：

- 约拿单×大卫

- 绝大部分创世纪的角色

- 乐园f4

- 以理沙•本-阿布雅的各种衰事和他的同事们。小说《as a driven leaf》入的坑但我搞的同人私设和它有偏差

我还没发塔木德同人，塔纳赫其实也没发很多。现在内容还没多少，这里主要是计划计划我这个博客以后会有啥内容。我学业比较忙所以这些内容大概也不会很快出来。整体来讲我不会经常更新。

了解塔纳赫和塔木德纯粹是我的个人爱好。我搞很多私设，但我将这些私设限制在我已经了解过并有一定程度认知的东西上面。如果你有很多塔纳赫和塔木德相关知识的话欢迎指教我。

⚠️你开始往下翻之前：

这是我的爱好，我的任何作品都不是对原著的正经解读，所有的解读或阴谋论均属于私设的范畴。从现在起我打tag会限制在“fandom”里而不是直接打原著的tag。

请记住，我是带着不可知论者的滤镜去解读这些故事的，我对待这些角色的态度和我对待别的饭圈角色的态度无差。所以如果你信教的话，此博客的内容大概不适合你。我喜欢g向，搞私设以及最重要的：我爱搞cp和拉郎。认真的，我的魔爪能染指一切，为了你的san值着想往下翻或关注之前请务必三思。

我的创作内容不适合任何18岁以下的人。这不仅仅是因为我喜欢探索残酷/糟糕的主题，也因为以后某个时候我会开始发r18的内容。

你大概能在本博客看到的内容：

-夸张化的角色设计和人设，没fate系列那样夸张但不会特别还原历史

-偏离学术和宗教刻画的私设，阴谋论和魔改

-拉郎搞cp

-一丢丢弔图

-漫画，如果我图力和时间特别充沛的话

-相关内容的转发

你不会看到的内容：

-任何来自我的对于原著的正经向声明

-对于任何宗教信仰的偏见。任何被描写的偏见，如果有，只存在于其所在的故事情景下且并不延伸到现实中我的个人信仰和观点中。这包括但不限于相应历史和文化环境中可能存在的性别歧视、仇外心理和同性恋歧视

-键政。本博客供且仅供娱乐目的，与任何现实世界中的政治和时事都无关

如果你仍然要继续，说明我说的东西你都觉得ok。玩得开心😊

我不知道有多少中文用户关注我的内容，目前我的帖子都是英文。如果有人想要我加上中文的话评论或私信我都可以，这样我以后的内容就会加上翻译。

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aurora567 · 1 month ago

Text

Kinktober Day 4 biting/marking - Riza/Laxus (Fairy Tail)

Warning: this story will contain mature content such as but not limited to sex, cursing, body and pussy worship.

Summary: Welcome to day two of kinktober. Enjoy some Riza and Laxus smut. Reading my first one shot of them would be helpful for the already established relationship

Word count: 3418

Last Day Next Day

It became clear quickly that Laxus was not going to leave any time soon. Riza had spotted the man poking his head not only around town but even at the old guild hall having seen him from time to time. It's not like she minded. They had not spoken to each other since the one night they spent together. It's not like she had anything to say to the man. Sure it had been fun, sure she was completely willing to do it again. But she had more important things to worry about. Jobs were still rare and she liked being able to eat. Still it was wonderful having the guild back together. It was odd how quiet things had truly been with all the strong wizards gone. Natsu and Gray still argued daily. Erza would beat them into shape, even Elfman running around like an idiot after his two sisters had oddly been greatly missed.

And it was clear falling back into life for some was harder than others. Seven years had been a long time and a lot had happened. Riza tried not to pay the returned guild mates too much attention. She was busy going about her own life. She went on missions, most were small jobs around town, and she returned to her room to sleep.

She had just finished a job in town when she was making her way back to the guild. Her steps never even paused as a grating voice she knew well filled her ears and she had to hold back the urge to groan as the voice called her name.

“Riza! Oi little Riza,” she finally paused in her steps and turned to face the man that tormented her in her teens. He was so damn annoying.

“What do you want Bixlow?” She growled at the man who just tossed his long arms up into the air in surrender at her anger.

His fellow guild mates were staring at the tall man with exasperated looks on their faces. She could only assume that they had warned the man that she may act like that. It had been no secret he bugged and bullied her when she had been seven years younger then them and not the same age.

“No need to bite my head off, baby,” he had said as he raised his arms in surrender before dropping them down.

“I just wanted to know if you were aware of the good news,” he said as he and the other two walked towards her. Instead of asking him what he was talking about she turned to look at Freed.

“What good news?” She asked as she looked over at the green haired man. She still struggled to believe that Freed had cut his long green hair off.

“Laxus will be returning to the guild,” he said simply, which had Bixlow whining that he wanted to tell her. It was a surprise to hear. She honestly assumed after the shit that idiot had pulled he would never have been allowed back. But it sounded like he had been an important person to have at Tenrou Island. And those good deed’s had earned him his forgiveness.

“And you decided I needed to know that immediately why?” She should never have bothered to ask that question.

“Well we figured you would be happy to learn about that after all you and Laxus hooked up when we got back,” by the look that was shot at Bixlow by his two fellow thunder legion members he was not meant to say that to her. And there was good reason for it. Laxus had told them. She was pissed. She had not told a soul about what the two of them had done that night. She was not sure if her cheeks were heating out of anger or embarrassment.

“Where’s Laxus?” She asked, her voice far calmer than she felt. Which was probably why the idiot in front of her did not see her bubbling anger. Instead thinking she was happy and not pissed.

“Probably at his home,” the tall idiot said as he shrugged his shoulders. She did not even thank him before she was storming off toward where she recalled the man used to live before he left the guild.

“How did you know those two hooked up?” Evergreen had asked as the three of them had stood back watching.

“I didn’t. But they disappeared at the same time and Laxus has been watching her lately. He would never admit it. But it’s clear he likes her,” Bixlow said before he started to saunter back towards the guild.

“You just pissed her off. You know she’s about to go yell at him,” Evergreen pointed out as the group started walking again.

“What better way for them to have some angry make up sex then,” Bixlow had shrugged his shoulders and smirked as he heard Evergreen start to gag.

She had quickly stormed across town and up the little dirt road that led up to the cabin that Laxus had called home. Even in that time her anger did not subside. As she reached his door she banged her fist into the wood and she did not stop till a voice yelled at her to stop before the door swung open. Laxus stood there looking irritated at her.

“What the hell are you doing?” He asked unsure why the woman was just banging on his door like a mad woman.

“You told them,” she yelled at him. Which had his irritation change to curiosity.

“What the hell are you talking about?” He had asked as he stood there raising one pale eyebrow at her.

“Bixlow, Freed and Evergreen. You told them we slept together,” she barked at him as if he should have known what she was talking about. He looked surprised as she barked at him.

“I did not,” he said, denying what she knew had to be true.

“Yes you did. Bixlow told me he knew. The only way that was possible is if you told him,” she was completely yelling at him. Which would have been funny to see a short woman standing there yelling at a man who looked like he could snap her in half.

“I did not tell Bixlow,” Laxus stood his ground. And surprisingly held back his own temper. His stand had her pause for a moment in her yelling. Her face was still red but it was hard to tell if it was anger or embarrassment.

“Then how did he know?” She asked as she paused in her yelling.

“He probably didn’t. He probably made some teasing comment, you reacted and he assumed and you just solidified that he was right by coming here in a storm and yelling at me.” Laxus said as he crossed his arms over his chest. Her anger had disappeared as fast as it had come and a heavy embarrassment washed over her as she stood there on his doorstep.

She was not sure what to say as she stood there on his doorstep. Sorry probably should have been the first thing she said. Yet she stood there frozen before she let out a groan and her shoulders slumped in defeat. She had just fucked herself over hadn’t she?

“I fucked up,” that was probably the closest thing to an apology she was going to give. Which had the blonde laughing at her.

“Oh yeah you did,” he agreed, which only made her groan more.

“Don’t agree,” she whined softly which only earned her more laughter from him.

“Do you wanna come in?” Laxus decided to try and change the subject as she just stood there on his doorstep.

“I probably should just head back,” she said with a heavy sigh.

“Are you sure you want to return to the guild right now?” He asked, expecting Bixlow would be there and waiting for a chance to tease her. And it seemed she realized the same thing as her face scrunched up.

“Never mind. Thank you for inviting me in,” she said as he had stepped back and opened up the doorway to his home allowing her to walk in. His home was in no way huge. But it was much larger than her tiny room. The place was warm and comfortable. Very homey.

It was not as weird being around him as she had expected it to be. Maybe he had matured during his time away from the guild or they just seemed to get along better then she recalled they ever did. Then again she avoided his group like the plague thanks to Bixlow. But even Laxus talked with her like an equal compared to how she thought he used to look down at her like most of the other Fairy Tail guild members.

And the fact that when she got up to leave and his strong arms wrapped around her waist she found herself sitting in his lap. A squeak of his name had escaped her lips. She had not expected it when she went to leave. She could feel his nose running over the skin of her neck.

“Stay,” had been the single word he had nearly whispered into her skin before his lips were on her neck. She sat in his lap, her back up against his chest as he leaned over her in order to trail kisses over her soft skin. As soon as he started to suck on her unmarked skin she couldn’t help but moan. She had really enjoyed the last time. What harm could come from repeating that one time they were together.

She didn’t try to pull away and as she moaned she could feel his cock twitch against her ass. Her moan also seemed to only encourage him to do more. His lips sucked and kissed at all the exposed skin he could reach. Though her shirt did not expose much as it sat close around her neck. Which earned a growl from the dragon slayer behind her. And before she could say a word his hands were tugging her shirt up. She let him as she raised her arms to help prevent him from ripping the shirt right off of her.

In only her sports bra there was much more of her skin exposed. Lips were all over her right shoulder in an instant. Kisses and hickeys being left behind. That was till she suddenly let out a cry and her body jolted. Large arms wrapped around her body preventing her from running. Though she had no desire to run. The pain has shocked her. Teeth had sunk into her flesh. It burned slightly. And looking down once he had let go revealed indents for almost every single tooth in his mouth. The area was red and looked sore. Yet his tongue still lapped over the fresh mark he had just made. She shivered and whimpered at the feeling. It hurt and yet the wetness in her panties revealed that a part of her had enjoyed that, a little too much at that. As he let go her body went limp in his lap. That had been way too much of a turn on.

She was not the only one who had enjoyed that. The sudden urge to bite had been incredibly strong. So much so that he just did it. He had sunk his teeth into the soft flesh of her shoulder. He almost thought she was going to try and run away. He had almost attempted to draw blood. The skin was already a bright red once he brought himself to release his jaw. That had felt good, the little noises she made had helped. But it was the scent of her arousal that told him she really had enjoyed that.

His cock was hard and nearly digging into one of her ass cheeks as she sat on his lap panting heavily as she nearly felt like she was melting back against his chest. She was putty in his arms now. Who knew a good little love bite was all it took and she would become so pliant.

Scooping her up into his arms was easy to do when she did not fight him. She let out a squeak of surprise and her hands had gripped weakly at his shirt. But she did not struggle or even ask to be put down. She let him carry her through his home and into his room. More gently than the last time he placed her down on his bed. Seeing her in his bed this time tickled a very odd primal feeling in the back of his head. She was his and she was in his home now.

He blamed the dragon lacrima buried in his body for his less than human feelings. He never fought against these feelings though. It just felt natural to go with them. Like before he had wanted to sink his teeth into her. Mark her, claim her, make sure that anyone who saw her would know she was his. After all, by now the enteror guild had to know about them. Why hide it? And it made him more happy than he could express. His teeth ached to do it again too.

He gave in to his more animalistic desires as he placed her in his bed. His fingers fumbling to undo her pants and then start ripping them down her legs. He nearly ripped her off the bed on the first tug he had pulled so hard.

He couldn’t help but want her naked, her body still filled his dreams after the last time he had seen her. His hands itched to feel her smooth skin and his teeth now ached to mark that unblemished skin. He wanted her naked and naked now. His fingers gripped the top of her panties and peeled the damp material away from her body. He was a little more gentle this time as he did not need to pull so hard to get her panties off. The look she was giving him also was a clear warning that if he ripped them she would be unhappy.

Her own fingers tugged at her sports bra quickly so that she was completely naked. His eyes were roaming over her body even as his own hands pulled his shirt up and over his head to toss across his bedroom. As soon as his shirt was over his head her eyes openly ran over his body. Then again he had not tried to hide his ogling so why should she?

He was still wearing his pants as he started to crawl across the bed towards her. She did not even try to keep her legs closed as she welcomed him to crawl over her body. His lips started to kiss along the inside of her leg. First his lips pressed kisses along her ankle. Then the side of her calf, up to the inside of a knee, up and along her thighs. The flesh there was soft and supple. The temptation was too much. Once again he sank his teeth into the flesh of her inner thigh. She let out a cry of pain that was quick to melt away into a moan as her body squirmed lightly beneath him.

Letting go of her thigh he watched as once again he left his dental imprint in her skin. Deciding she needed a matching set he turned and did the same to the other thigh. This time she was expecting it. She moaned out as his teeth sank into her flesh. He sucked softly at the flesh that his teeth dug into. He was pretty sure a bruise was forming by the time he let go. The fact that these marks would last days made him far happier than they should have.

Moving up he finally found his target. Her folds were dripping by the time his tongue was lapping over her. He could feel fingers reaching down to entangle in his hair. His fingers spread her open for him as his tongue delved in like a man starved. He could feel her body squirming beneath his hold. But he paid it no attention. Her moans told him to continue and so he did.

His tongue flicked her clit and her body nealy convulsed under the action as he teased her sensitive bud. The strangled moan she let out pleased him as he slipped two fingers into her body. Her juices coated his fingers and hand. His fingers thrust into her as he gave a soft suck at her clit. Her walls clamped around his fingers as she cried out in pleasure.

He quickly snatched his fingers out of her body and leaned back. She whined and whimpered. She had been so close and yet he had snatched away her orgasm just as it had started to build. She wanted to cry when he snatched her pleasure away.

“Laxus!” She begged softly as she watched his right hand move up and he was wiping her juices from his chin. Hearing her beg for him to continue had his patients drawing thin. He quickly undid his pants and started pushing them down his hips.

He slowly started to crawl up her body. Once again trailing kisses over her soft skin. Kicking his pants off he slowly crawled up her body. He gave one nipple a playful nip of his teeth but he did not linger long. She was not the only one who was eager. His hands gripped her hips, keeping her pinned to the bed just where he wanted her to be. His tip brushed her entrance and he could feel her body shiver beneath him in need.

In one hard thrust he sheathed himself deep into her body. She cried out and he could feel her fingernails digging into the flesh of his shoulders. She did not ask him to stop and he was thankful, he did not want to stop nor did he think he could stop. His hips picked up a fast and brutal pace. His! She was his and he would make sure everyone knew.

On her other shoulder at the junction of her shoulder and neck he dug his teeth into flesh once again. This time not as hard. But he still gave a good suck as her walls clamped down around him when he bit her. He even moaned into her flesh as her walls clamped down around him. She was so good, so perfect, and his.

Letting go of her shoulder he was panting heavily as his hips thrust. Nails were running down his back now as if she could force him closer to her somehow. He welcomed the sting from her scratches. He was so close. But then again by the sound of her whines and moans that filled his ears she was as well.

He could not hold back any longer, his thrusts lost their rhythm, and with a few more thrusts he was burying his head into her neck as he moaned. He emptied himself into her warm body. A few small thrusts of his hips and he was still as he rode out the pleasure from cumming. His body had crumpled on top of hers and had no desire to move till she grumbled and slapped his shoulder.

Rolling over he was able to look down at the small woman. And all the marks that now littered her body. He should have felt bad. He could count his teeth on more than one spot on her body. But he had never broken the skin. Still seeing the marks he left made him far too happy. He was going to chalk that up to his dragon nature.

He didn’t typically give in to such silly whims that he could have ignored. But this time it had felt too good not to give in a little. His bites would bruise and leave marks for days. His scent would also linger a day or two on her. But the marks would last longer and that had him smirking as she rolled over and glared at him and proceeded to growl at him that if anyone sees the marks she was going to kill him. Laxus paid her little attention. If anything he hoped someone saw them and he hoped that if she wanted to yell at him again it would lead to this happening again.

Next Day

#fairy tail #fairytail smut #laxus smut #laxus x oc #biting kink #marking kink #kinktober 2024

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