#you have to lack things as a child to develop into an adult that has will and capacity to survive

[indi-glo-archive]

why would mr. farouk become a teacher if he doesn't like kids

[barnbridges]

my most education major take is that people don't want you to parent your children anymore. people don't want mothers (and fathers) to give any sort of life-advice or care to their children. people have become so therapy-obsessed and the whole "intergenerational trauma" craze has made it so that you should actually pass nothing onto your child. you should just take your child to therapy and feed them baby formula until they're 18 and at that point, they're on their own. it's cruel and inhumane and the way people want to de-involve society at large in the raising of children, down to that they shouldn't even be parented anymore.

[divinerapturesys]

Welcome to my Ted Talk about AsPD, or Antisocial Personality Disorder, which the internet likes to coin as sociopath 👌🏻 if you don’t like long infodumps about stigmatized mental disorders from someone who is diagnosed, move on.

Quick toxic rundown: People with AsPD are generally characterized as emotionless, violent, manipulative abusers who kill animals and like to make other people their bitches. The biggest pet peeve we have is the emotionless, sadistic and abusive generalization.

Personally, we are highly neurotic, with highs and lows of: depression, frantic drive, self abuse tactics, chronic fear, lapses of rejection, overwhelming over-analyzation, grey area thinking, false goods and false bads, ultimatums, obsessive compulsive behavior, harsh self demands, and irritability.

AsPD is a disorder that is caused primarily (according to current research) by trauma and abuse in childhood; most notably being emotional neglect and absent caregivers that cause a child to have emotional shutdowns and repression episodes in an attempt to self soothe. Primary caregivers who do not bond with their children are also a factor. Children learn how to behave from those around them. If a primary caregiver is emotionally distant and unavailable, children will learn that is normal behavior and that’s how people are. If a primary caregiver does not provide empathy and sympathy during moments of distress and fear, children will learn that aloofness and disregard of others feelings is normal behavior. If a primary caregiver does not keep a child safe, children will learn that they should not prioritize their own safety or the safety of others. You can find my follow up post regarding this here.

Neglected and abused children often act out trying to get attention and help, often acting out in bad ways because they lack the ability to articulate what they’re feeling and what is happening to them. The pipeline for AsPD typically is: Oppositional Defiance Disorder as a child, Conduct Disorder as a teen, AsPD as an adult. There are a lot of warning signs cueing that AsPD is becoming a risk for development, but often kids do not have a support system to help negate it as it’s their support system that is usually a factor in its creation.

Being AsPD is like being an emotional La Croix 70% of the time. If you’re depressed, then it’s like someone in the other room has depression and is telling you about it. The other 30% of the time, if you’re depressed, your brain doesn’t understand how to handle it so it’s an ultimatum between doing something drastic to remove the Trigger or ignoring and dissociating for days on end.

People with AsPD are very good at ignoring things. Honestly it’s problematic as fuck but it’s not hard to ignore major issues when you just, don’t care. It’s not in the terms of being cruel or making ourselves not care, but the fact that finding the emotional willpower is so far out of our feasible reach we don’t do it. This causes us to piss people off because we don’t have the capacity to care as much as they want us to, even if we can and do to an extent.

Think of it this way: empathy/sympathy is a deep tub of water that everyone has. They can easily fill their measuring cup for the needed amount of empathy without any issues and it’s easy for them. People with AsPD don’t have a tub of water. We have shallow skillet. When we try to dip our cup to fill it, we can’t, it always comes up short and it is difficult to get any water in it as there is no room for the cup to dive. Our ability to care is limited because we do not have the same emotional resources everyone else does.

❌ False Positives & False Negatives ❌

I operate on what I’ve learned are called false positives and false negatives. These are things that are trained into the brain from an early age based off of childhood trauma and other factors. False positives are a distorted version of why we do something to help ourself and for our own good, meanwhile a false negative is something we do because it’s a threat, or based out of fear.

❌ Some of my false positives:

- It is good to be afraid of nothing

- It is good to adapt to someone’s personality if they are stronger than you

- It is good to isolate yourself

- It is good to be a silver tongue because you can get into any place you want

- It is good to become a social chameleon and shape yourself to whatever those around you need/want most, because then you have no chance of being abandoned

❌ Some of my false negatives, which can explain the false positives as well as core beliefs:

- it is bad to be afraid, if I am afraid then I am vulnerable and it can be used against me

- It is bad to be emotional or show concern for others emotions because they do not care for mine

- It is bad to be able to be exploited, because I believe it is everywhere

- It is bad to allow myself to be bored, because boredom begets bad thoughts and no one can or wants to help me when I spiral

- It is bad to not shape yourself to the social circle, because people quickly grow tired of those who do not match them perfectly and being discarded means I failed

My core beliefs can be viewed as the root for the false positives and negatives, because they are based on the core of trauma, abuse and neglect. They come from patterns and instances that make someone with AsPD become the opposite of what they experienced:

- eat or be eaten

- If I don’t show that my bite is worse than my bark, I will be taken advantage of and I must remain on top because the ones on top are safe

- I must look out for myself because nobody will do it for me

- It doesn’t matter what happens to me, therefore it doesn’t matter what people think of me

- If I cannot do something well, then I should not do it at all

- If you are dependent on others for emotional and mental well being, you are weak, therefore I must isolate myself to avoid becoming codependent and a burden and useless

- If I can handle the stress of a situation better than everyone else, therefore I will keep the problem (financial, emotional, mental, etc) to myself to reduce chances of being abandoned due to failure of perfection

People with AsPD are hard to get along with. We often:

- are always anticipating a fight

- lack respect for authority

- ignore social structures to an extent

- tendency to lie if it’ll lessen punishment or if we feel the lie is more acceptable than our actions

- limit social support because it’s wrong to be dependent on others

- have an inflated view of our own importance — which turns into a self ridicule for believing someome like me could be found important to others —

- can be rude and inconsiderate of others feelings somewhat unintentionally

- are unable to read the correct social cues in relation to empathy towards people and animals

- am constantly confused by others dependence upon empathy and inability to make desicions from logic based standpoints

We can’t speak for everyone who has AsPD, nor are we saying that no one with AsPD is capable of being a murderer/abuser etc. but we are saying that y’all need to stop automatically classifying someone as a certain “type” as soon as you know about their disorder.

One last thing I do want to point out is that it is not uncommon for people with AsPD to derive some sort of enjoyment in causing harm, doing something illegal, hurting someone or animals, etc. This entirely stems from lack of environmental control as a child. Being able to control what happens to others or being able to control the things you say or do that hurts someone else is a hefty high to get addicted to; it soothes the underlying itch of not being able to control your own trauma and abuse, so in turn you push these behaviors onto others and enjoy it because it gives you a sense of power and control. Some people with AsPD do genuinely love hurting others, and some enjoy hurting others when they believe it’s deserved or their ire has been stoked. Some enjoy causing pain to those they think deserve it, and others don’t care who they hurt as long as they feel like they’re in control of the situation.

Hope this have some insight into AsPD 🤙🏻 if y’all have any questions, shoot.

[punkpandapatrixk]

❤️‍🩹I Just Want to be Loved ♦︎ Timeless Pick A Card

We attract terrible loves for various reasons; so many lessons; but now sorrow has got to lessen. Let’s reveal patterns by exhuming roots. We’ve got to stop this cycle of disappointments. Done being made to feel as if we’re hard to love.

We’re not hard to love. Many of us were simply denied love, warmth and affection as we were growing up… Don’t know how to love self; don’t know how to love others; basically don’t know how to even receive Love… Who’s to blame now?

Why the hell were so many children denied love, warmth, affection…?

What are you going to do with yourself when you were denied love, warmth and affection as you were growing up?

☆♪°・.

‘The child who isn’t embraced by the village will burn it down to feel its warmth.’ – an African proverb

People denied warmth and affection tend to fall into a desperate loop of fishing for attention as a result of love-deficiency, right? Some learn to lick love off a knife; some pursue success (whatever that means) all too frantically; some…shoot complete strangers in broad daylight; and some who ain’t got the guts to murder complete strangers in public places go instead for antagonising strangers on social media… Gosh, that is desperate.

But you know what, not all hope is lost because there’s still plenty of us who are blessed with this incredibly RARE thing called self-awareness. There are plenty of us who will take our traumas to the graveyard than pass them down the next generations.

You, don’t deserve to have your sanity and your Life ruined by some psychos who didn’t know how to love you. Reclaim lost pieces of yourself by understanding THREE Houses in your natal chart, babe:

4th House: your roots; tells you what was lacking in your home; explains your erratic 10th House ambitions

8th House: your marriage or your desire for a bond like it; this the House where trauma manifests itself in full spectrum

11th House: your wish fulfilment; where you connect with people who support your visions; breeds a healthy sense of connection, even community

SONG: Emptiness by BoA

MOVIE: Breakfast at Tiffany’s (1961)

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☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 1 – Because I Can’t Even Trust Myself

VIBE: Trust by Hamasaki Ayumi

lost pieces (pertaining to 4th House) – Ace of Pentacles Rx

It’s clear your childhood didn’t offer a sense of stability or security—the physical kind that children usually need. It could be that a grownup left early or it could be that you moved around a lot, so you easily lost contact with new friends you’d just made. In essence, it feels like you grew up feeling ‘everything disappears eventually; everyone leaves eventually’.

Some of you might’ve grown up not having a lot of material resources, but for the majority of you tuning into this Pile, it was more a feeling of a lack of warmth. For children, the pain of neglect and a lack of emotional connection do really affect our physical health more severely. You might’ve grown up poor and sickly due to all the grownups around you being inattentive, unaffectionate, and just…unreliable at best.

Because of this awareness, from a young age you realised you would have to do everything yourself. You wanted to grow up quickly and do your own things your own ways. It’s not like you had to grow up fast, you wanted to grow up fast to have your freedom and power! It was…hard to trust adults. It was hard to trust the world at large.

growing pains (pertaining to 8th House) – 8 of Pentacles

On the path of growing up, I think you became a hard worker of sort? This is very nuanced though—there are layers to your developing yourself to become a hardworking person. In many ways, you grew up responsible because you didn’t want to become like the adults who had disappointed you. But since this sense of ‘responsibility’ is a product of neglect and trauma…this is coming off as your feeling responsible for everything. Everything!

Some of you could’ve been too hard on yourself, expecting way too much for your age. You’ve felt like you’re always the one with everything to prove. It’s hard living like that. It feels like you’ve put so much effort into keeping everything together, and yet, nobody sees how much you care. Nobody truly understands the fear in your mind and pain you carry in your heart.

In matters of relationship, you cling extra hard to friends or lovers, too; because deep down you’re afraid of losing things and people, again and again. This unhealthy attachment—and to some extent, controlling behaviour—is truly your wounded inner child attempting frantically to keep your Reality from falling apart…

reclamation (pertaining to 11th House) – 4 of Cups

I’m very sure that at some point in Life, your Higher Self and team of Spirit Guides are going to kick in and meddle with your Earthly business. For some people, it’s possible you could lose contact with everybody you’ve ever known in Life and go into a hermit mode to find yourself again. For some, it could be that your whole Life is simply flipped, without necessarily losing key people in your Life, for you to look at Life and human connections from a very different point of view.

It’s going to be hard, of course. Emotionally, it could be devastating. Themes of abandonment and betrayal are big in your incarnation. But you know, ultimately, all of these challenges serve to remind you that the Cup of Love and Affection you’ve been looking for has always been right inside of you. You’ve had a bitter time with a lot of people because deep down you couldn’t trust them. You couldn’t trust other people’s loyalty because you didn’t even believe that you’re worthy of that Love and Loyalty you yearn for.

Your Spirit Guides are saying, that although at some point in Life things are going to get really tough, know that when you’ve graduated those lessons, you’re going to be rewarded with the most beautiful Soulmate-shit friendships, familyship and relationship. Truth be told, part of your Soul’s scenario in this incarnation is to find your Soul Tribe; and find your Tribe you shall~

A L O N E🔻💗

ALL of you – Red Alchemist (John Dee)

becoming ONE and whole – Priestess of Healing

Access full reading + cards on Patreon����

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 2 – Misled by My Own Compassion

VIBE: Cry Me A River by Julie London

lost pieces (pertaining to 4th House) – Knight of Cups

It’s very likely your 4th House is in a Water sign, but if not, you’re still very much a Water-y person; perhaps your Ascendant or Moon is in a Water sign, or that you have Neptune/Moon near/in your 4th, 7th or 11th House. All of this generally makes you a deeply compassionate person. No matter what outer appearances give, you strive to look deeper into a person’s Soul. You have so much empathy and you want to believe in the good of people.

Alas! This rotten world doesn’t make it too easy. This world is not a world where kindness and compassion are truly rewarded, if we don’t learn to be a tad cruel ourselves. You’re not in the wrong for being so genuinely good and compassionate; it’s this world that’s the wrong world. You know that? Therefore, it is paramount you learn to be a bitchilante! But I’m getting ahead of myself.

In spite of this PAC’s intro, I sense the majority of you tuning into this Pile actually grew up quite well. Many of you actually grew up in loving homes and that’s why it’s been quite challenging for you to grapple with the realness of the ugliness of the world outside of your loving home. Really…people in the real world…are monsters! And you were taken aback!

But some of you instead most likely grew up in chaotic, battlefield-esque homes and that’s why you’ve striven to be so good to a point of detriment.

growing pains (pertaining to 8th House) – 0 The Fool Rx

Be that as it may, you being you… Well, you do put in the effort to try and understand what makes monsters the way that they are, right? It’s all good and wonderful, until you get yourself in deep trouble where nobody can save you but your own monstrosity. Depending on your age when reading this, this could be something that’s happened in the past or will happen; where you will be forced to grow up in the sense of seeing the world as it is and get firm with assholes!

Dr Jordan Peterson has this gold shit to summarise this spiritual lesson you will be taking at some point in Life: ‘You should be a monster, an absolute monster, and then you should learn to control it.’ Well, that’s male speech. In female speech, we just say: ‘you gotta grow up and be a bitchilante!’

Be a bitch only to those who deserve it. How would you protect yourself from monsters if you don’t have the strength to fight them at their own game, darling? If you’re harmless, weak as a fawn, if anything, the real monsters in the world are going to toy with your sanity: ‘I saw my “crazy” side once and decided I wouldn’t be involved with anyone that would take me out of my peace like that ever again.’

Be a bitchilante. That whole concept of ‘good, harmless, love and light, positivity-only’ bullshit was put out there not to really make you good but to weaken you against the truly monstrous ones. WAKE UP, BITCH!

reclamation (pertaining to 11th House) – 4 of Pentacles

So? So what if you’re selective with your affection? Not everybody deserves your compassion. That’s for sure. There are many people in the world and you can’t be nice to all of them. One at point or another, you’re gonna be a villain in someone’s story—so what? Everybody else is the main character of their own Stories; that, you can’t control.

Be careful that you’re not falling victim to your own narcissism in wanting to be praised in everybody’s Story, yeah? So then, pertaining to your 11th House, weirdly enough, your wish fulfilment is in the form of a psychological liberation from your own idea of yourself in the minds of others. I sense that if you’re East Asian this is gonna resonate much harder and louder LOL

Anyway, I want to assure you that once you’ve graduated from your spiritual lessons, you will be met with unique, courageous, rebellious weirdos who will be just as clear as you are about what it truly means to be a good person in a world that’s often very bad. How good should a person be to truly be considered a good person?

‘If I offended you, cry me a river. I’ll bring snacks and a raft. I will literally float down your tears eating chips and working on my tan.’ – Fuckology

A L O N E🔻💚

ALL of you – Green Geographer (Gerardus Mercator)

becoming ONE and whole – Priestess of Success

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

Pile 3 – Lights Out; I’m Out to Find Myself

VIBE: To. X by Taeyeon

lost pieces (pertaining to 4th House) – Ace of Cups Rx

I’ve to preface this Pile by saying this the pile that gets a little violent…

You were originally such a positive, happy-go-lucky kid, but quite early on, this world gave you so much darkness. So many reasons to be sad. It’s not been a very kind life, to be honest. Defo many of you have tragical placements here—your 4th or 5th House could start or end in Scorpio; have Lilith/Pluto/Chiron/Saturn there or in the sign of Cancer/Pisces; or it could be that your Venus/Moon is imprisoned in the 8th or 12th House and harshly aspected, too...

If your childhood has been violent or mightily confusing, it’s a group thing, OK? You can think like that. It’s not your fault. Know that practically everybody who has these harsh placements has gone through very similar things as you. So you’re really not the only one who’s failing—whatever that means. You’ve been gaslit a lot into believing there’s something wrong with you, but it was your environment that was just filled with totally terrible Human beings. That much I’d like to assure you.

It wasn’t natural how you were abused psychologically and emotionally. The people around you drew a parallel to Cinderella’s stepsisters in the Disney classic. It’s ridiculous like that. I think you grew up terribly lonely and created comfort characters in your head to console your sorrows? It’s very likely that your comfort characters were in actuality a mirror fragment of your Soul Family’s existence locked in your memory bank.

growing pains (pertaining to 8th House) – XIV Temperance Rx

Life, unfortunately, isn’t a Disney movie. As a result of the psychological and emotional abuse you’ve endured in childhood, your friendships and relationships might’ve been quite turbulent, at times even violent. Juuust a small number of you could’ve dealt with being called a violent kid, or you could’ve struggled with anger management and have terrible tantrums. All of these have made human connections quite difficult to navigate.

It’s not like you want to be a nasty person, right? Many times, you couldn’t help the way you react/respond to what’s being said and unsaid because, somehow, there are many things that people do and say that trigger a trauma response in you. There’s a very difficult Mars thingy going on here. I think many of you resonating with this Pile have some difficult Mars (ruler of Scorpio) placements/aspects that affect the way you manifest human connections in your Life.

Speaking in terms of synastry, it could be that you’ve attracted a great deal of people whose Mars aspected badly in your natal chart—consequently triggering bad traumas and manifesting violent outbursts in your connections. Ultimately though, these negative experiences with other people could’ve enforced your belief about how unlovable you are, which, really, is a false belief…

reclamation (pertaining to 11th House) – 5 of Wands

It is a false Reality that you’re unlovable or unworthy of a healthy relationship. That bullshit was implanted in you through the creation of a harsh environment that caused you a great deal of rage. Of course, you’re accountable for how you behave towards other people, but your foundation was never quite healthy or peaceful or harmonious, so… How about we put it all behind us and focus on healing? After all, it’s not like the people you’ve had a beef with were completely innocent? XP

It's kinda selfish to think like that, but you can depend on your own discernment to distinguish who amongst the people you’ve hurt or had a beef with to apologise to. Remember: sometimes apologies only make you weaker and looking at the unique bullshit astrological placements you were born with… apologising to the wrong fucker would only get you gaslit even more! So, don’t. Don’t apologise for the distress you experienced under other people’s lack of support.

Burn that bridge and detach yourself from that old stinking world. With your sheer willpower, you have it in you to rebuild your own little world of love and peace. After all, those harsh placements you were born with, are you aware of just how much power they bestow you? These placements come with a lot of turbulences but once you graduate your first Saturn Return, they also give you a burst of power unlike any other!

Lights out. Not entertaining aenergies that seek to nip your power at the bud anymore. Burn, baby, burn strong! Burn the whole Tower and find yourself on new lands~!

A L O N E🔻💜

ALL of you – Gold Alchemist (Roger Bacon)

becoming ONE and whole – Priestess of Solitude

Access full reading + cards on Patreon🌸

☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・. ☆♪°・.

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[youremyheaven]

Jupiter Dominant Women & Daddy Issues

TW: mentions of rape, abuse, suicide etc

Over the years of my studies, I have noticed that its Jupiter dominant women who tend to have daddy issues more than any other planetary dominance. Solar women (Uttarashada, Uttaraphalguni & Krittika) tend to benefit from positive male influence in their early life, so they have healthy Yang qualities (they're driven, self-motivated, critical thinking) whereas women who haven't had a healthy male influence in their early lives, either develop a heightened but fragile femininity (understood in a very traditional way, this means being passive and excessively reliant on others to get by, I know this is misogynistic but i am talking strictly about a traditional notion of femininity) or they cultivate inner masculinity.

Jupiter is a masculine planet and across the naks of Punarvasu, Vishaka and Purvabhadrapada, women tend to have a very unguarded, open, almost masculine presence. I mean this in terms of what they talk about or how self-assured they seem, traditionally women were expected to be more withdrawn or to talk little. I don't mean to say Jupiterian women are brash or aggressive, they're very poised, and elegant and put across their point eloquently. They're 9/10 times very well-spoken. When one lacks the security of a male figure early in life, one tends to cultivate inner masculinity because it's understood that you cannot rely on any man.

Caroline Polachek, Punarvasu Moon, has spoken about her difficult relationship with her father on numerous occasions. Here's a link to a post where she talks about it. Her lack of a father figure in her own words caused her to be "self-sufficient". Notice how in the post, she speaks about making amends with him later in life and even ended the post with "love you dad". This is the kind of generosity that you don't see from most other nakshatra types. To forgive someone who was never there for you/abused you/hurt you/caused you immense pain, requires a great deal of strength and maturity and not everybody has it. Punarvasu's innate nature is to absorb everything into its orbit and always be the bigger person. Due to the vast, abundant nature of Jupiter, they are ABLE to, accept these people for all their contradictions and see them as flawed, which makes it easier to forgive them. Most people let their traumas define their identity (im not saying traumas don't shape you, only about the kind of perception most people have about their own traumas) and spend their whole lives blaming others for who they've become or what they've done to them. To live a peaceful life, one has to take the high road, look beyond everything and see it as a part of life. It sounds very callous when I say it like that but that's what I mean. Not everyone is capable of being the bigger person or taking the high road.

Jupiter is the guru or teacher and how would one describe an ideal teacher? Someone who forgives the mistakes of their students as having risen out of immaturity and forgives them for not knowing better or being better. A teacher is forced to operate on a higher moral plane than others simply because chaos would descend if the teacher came down to the level of others. They are figures of wisdom, knowledge and higher learning, therefore their behaviour has to reflect the same. Jupiter natives are harshly punished for behaving in ways that are not fit for a "guru" because subconsciously society/those around them subject them to a different standard. Others can do the same exact thing and not suffer any consequences but when a Jupiter native behaves that way, they're ostracized. People kind of expect them to have it all together or be better. Any lapse on their part is judged harshly.

One of the biggest mysteries is how Jupiter natives emerge from often brutally abusive and neglectful childhoods into relatively well-adjusted adults. In the case of famous parent-child situations, there is public proof of their wrongdoing but in numerous other instances many do not believe Jupiter natives to have suffered the way they have or to the extent they have simply because on the outside they seem to have it all/seem so put together. This is yet another manifestation of Jupiter's duality and this not being believed/seen for who they are/how they've lived can be a source of pain/grief for some of these natives whilst others like to pretend it never happened and present a very positive view of their life. They don't hold grudges and often simply overlook the horrible nature of their loved ones, especially their parents and try to make amends with them.

Drew Barrymore, Punarvasu Moon, comes from a very famous family of actors but her father John Barrymore was a violent alcoholic and a drug addict who abandoned her & her mother when she was a child. She did not have any relationship with him and seldom spoke to him until he was diagnosed with cancer. She took care of him and even paid his medical bills until he passed away in 2004. Here's an IG post where she talks about her dad. It's so touching to see the compassion with which Punarvasu natives talk about people who've hurt them so much (in her memoir, Drew recalls how one time her father picked her up as a three-year-old and threw her against the wall). Truly, I don't see this level of kindness in any other nakshatra if I'm being honest. This is a photograph of her with Steven Spielberg who directed her in E.T when she was 7 years old, he's kind of a godfather figure to her and she apparently asked him to be her dad when she was a kid 🥺🥺

I also think Jupiter natives have a complicated relationship with their mothers as well, sometimes they're extremely close but other times, I think Jupiter natives feel the need to be their mother's saviour because they know how much she's gone through in her life. This manifests itself in a very complicated relationship. There is love but there is also a lot of bitterness.

Drew Barrymore has a very complicated relationship with her mother, who used to date the men Drew dated, pushed her into acting and exploited her as a child and admitted her to a psych ward when she was 12 among other things. Drew still takes care of her financially and has mentioned that her mother has even tried to steal money from her.

Charlotte Gainsbourg, Punarvasu Moon is the daughter of Serge Gainsbourg and Jane Birkin. Her parents separated when she was a child and she lived with her father. In 1984, she did a duet with her father and starred in the music video for a song called Lemon Incest which describes an incestuous relationship between father & daughter. She was 12 years old at the time.

The music video is creepy, to say the least and features both of them half-naked in bed together. In 1986 when she was 14, she starred with her father in a movie called Charlotte For Ever which is about an alcoholic man whose only link to life is his daughter (Serge was an alcoholic). She has spoken about how difficult the filming experience was for her as he would push her to her extremes.

Here's a very uncomfortable clip of him kissing her on the mouth when she wins a Cesar. She is 16 years old.

Jane Birkin commented on the song saying "It never came as a shock or a surprise or even a worry [to her], knowing Serge's great love for Charlotte". Many believe that Birkin enabled Serge's abuse of their daughter since she left him due to his alcoholism and violence but left Charlotte in his care. She has also stated that her mother would always dress her up as a little boy when she was a child and that this complicated her relationship with her femininity.

Charlotte has only ever said good things about both her parents and denied any abuse.

She's also starred in multiple films directed by Lars Von Trier where she plays gruesome sexually depraved characters and Lars is well known for being difficult to work with. She has said that she sought fatherly approval from him ._. and again has only said good things about him.

Kali Uchis, Punarvasu Sun, Vishaka Moon & Rising has spoken about being abused as a child and that she no longer maintains contact with her family. She was kicked out of the house when she was 17 and slept in her car and worked at a supermarket for years to support herself.

Halsey, Punarvasu Moon. She grew up poor and has spoken about her difficult childhood, both she & her mother suffer from bipolar disorder and in her song Whispers she sings “Why do you need love so badly?/ Bet it's bеcause of her daddy." In the Armchair Expert podcast, she said that she has both "mommy and daddy issues".

Mariah Carey, Punarvasu Moon, has published a very revealing memoir about her life where she chronicles the abuse she experienced from her family. She had a moderately good relationship with her dad but was estranged from him as an adult. Her mother however continually exploited her for money.

Miley Cyrus, Vishaka Moon has a complicated relationship with both her parents. Currently, she's not on speaking terms with her father after he married a woman around Miley's age.

Beyonce, Vishaka Moon has been performing since she was a child and was in a girl group Destiny's Child which was managed by her father. She dropped him as her manager in 2011 and in the same year, his divorce from her mother was also finalized. He had apparently fathered a love child with another woman in 2009 and this was the reason for their divorce. Some speculate that they are now estranged but in typical Jupiter fashion, she has never bad-mouthed him in public. Jupiter natives do not air their dirty laundry in public ever. Their grace and dignity even in the face of extreme humiliation/shame/pressure is commendable.

Jennie, Vishaka Moon is very close to her mother but she's never mentioned her father in the 8 years since her debut. In the Blackpink documentary, she said that growing up it was just her and her mom. In this interview she spoke about living with her mother and how she never got a chance to spend much time at home as she was sent to boarding school at 8 years old. She remarks that she and her mom are like sisters but she's never said anything about her relationship with her dad, ever. I am not going to assume that they have a bad relationship but I thought it would be interesting to mention.

Demi Moore, Vishaka Sun

Moore was born to a 19-year-old mother and her biological father left before she was born. The actress' mom remarried a man who worsened her problems with alcohol, which led to violence and instability. The family moved many times throughout Moore's childhood and when she was 17, her stepfather committed suicide. In the early '80s, she embarked on her acting career and helped her mother stay in rehab throughout the years. In 1997, her mother was diagnosed with brain cancer and she reunited with her in the final months before her death.

Lily Collins, Purvabhadrapada Sun

Lily had a strained relationship with her dad growing up“Because my dad was often gone, I never wanted to do anything that would make him stay away even longer,” she wrote. “I became extra careful about what I said and how I said it, afraid he'd think I was angry or didn't love him"

She penned an open letter that said: "I forgive you for not being the dad I expected. But it's not too late”.

Alia Bhatt, Purvabhadrapada Sun has said that growing up she saw very little of her filmmaker father Mahesh Bhatt who is known in the media for being a very problematic figure. He once posed for a magazine cover in the 90s with his daughter Pooja Bhatt where they're kissing on the lips (Pooja is Alia's half-sister) and said that he would have married her if she weren't his daughter 🤮🤮Mahesh is known for being a very temperamental man (you'll be hard pressed to find a video of him not screaming) and it's quite well known that he and Alia's mother had a pretty rocky marriage that her mother could not leave as she was financially dependent on him. Her sister, Shaheen Bhatt has talked about struggling with depression and suicidal tendencies since she was a child.

Rekha, Purvabhadrapada Moon is the illegitimate child of actors Gemini Ganesan and Pushpavalli. Her father was already married to another woman when she was born. He refused to accept the paternity of Rekha and her sister Radha and she grew up in the same city that her father and his "legitimate" family lived in and attended the same school as her half-siblings where she occasionally saw glimpses of him dropping his other kids to school. She has stated that growing up she was called a "bastard" and that the only male figure in her life was "God". She made her debut as an actress when she was 13 against her wishes because her family had fallen on bad times and she had to work to support her 6 siblings and ill mother.

This interview of hers offers a glimpse into her early life. Regardless of what she's been through, Rekha has always been stoic and conducted herself with immense grace and dignity even when she received an award from her father who was never a part of her life. She said this in response:

“Why should I grieve for him when he’s so much part of me? Why should I grieve when I’m so grateful for his genes, his teachings, his rich life and his sheer existence? Grieve for what??!! I’m happy I didn’t have to share unpleasant moments with him. He existed for me in my imagination. And that’s so much more beautiful than reality. Everything I love is unqualified by worldly time constraints. I’m just a small link in the larger scheme of things. I’m not the first one to go through death, nor am I the first one to receive an award. I’m enjoying everything that comes my way…good bad or ugly. I try to make good use of what life’s experiences offer. I think I’ve done a good job of my life, whatever others may think.” 

The Jupiterean ability to always look at the bright side and forgive people who don't deserve your forgiveness is heart-breaking but enlightening at the same time.

Rita Hayworth, Purvabhadrapada Moon confided in her husband Orson Welles that she was sexually abused by her father as a child and had been repeatedly raped by him.

Elexus Jionde aka Intelexual Media, Punarvasu Moon has mentioned that she's estranged from her father.

Arnold Schwarzenegger, Punarvasu Rising & stellium has spoken about being emotionally and physically abused by his parents especially his father who would beat him up. They also abused him because they thought he was gay due to his preoccupation with the male physique (he wanted to be a bodybuilder and would later become Mr World).

Keanu Reeves, Punarvasu Moon has been estranged from his father for the majority of his life. Charles Reeves abandoned the family when Keanu was 3 yrs old.

Kaia Gerber, Purvabhadrapada Moon has like most other Jupiter natives kept a low profile and seldom spoken about her personal life and has only ever said nice things about her parents. Her father Rande Gerber has been accused of sexual harassment by multiple women and there have been blind items about Cindy putting Kaia on a calorie deficit diet since she was a child to prepare her for a modelling career (this is awfully common among celebrities so I don't even think this is a stretch). When Kaia was 7 years old, her parents were threatened with a picture of her, barely clothed being gagged and bound. It was said that the picture was taken by a female babysitter during a game of cops and robbers because she wanted to prank the Gerbers by pretending to kidnap Kaia (sincerely, wtf) but there have been conspiracy theories that perhaps Kaia was abused by her parents and this picture was leaked from their collection. Anyway the matter has been settled and it feels wrong for me to speculate too much but I thought I'd mention it anyway.

Asia Argento, Purvabhadrapa Moon, is the daughter of filmmaker Dario Argento and has said that she never saw her father as a child and had no kind of relationship with him until she started acting in his movies when she was 16. She said "I never acted out of ambition; I acted to gain my father's attention. It took a long time for him to notice me. … And he only became my father when he was my director."

Her characters in his movies were undressed, raped and generally psychologically traumatised on screen. She once said:

"But I always had this feeling of never being a part of anything, not even of my family. My parents forgot about me. I did everything I could to get their attention."

Chyler Leigh, Vishaka Moon. Her parents divorced when she was 12, following which she was estranged from her father for many years. Her mother moved her to LA when she was a teenager so that she could pursue an acting career. At 15 years old she starred in a movie called Kickboxing Academy as her biological brother's love interest (he was 19). She is said to have been manipulated into doing so by her mother. She has said in a recent interview that she's been estranged from her mother for over 20 years and that like her mother, she too suffers from bipolar disorder. She said, "Because I was put in a position to support my mother, I didn't get the opportunity to speak about my own feelings when I was in my teens." She moved out of her mother's house to live with her then-boyfriend and now husband Nathan West.

Han So Hee, Vishaka Sun was in the news when her mother using her name to borrow bank loans and her debt became public news. Its very rare to hear about the private life of a celebrity in Korea but Sohee came forward to clear things and said her parents divorced when she was 5 following which she was raised by her maternal grandmother with whom she lived until she was in highschool. She's estranged from both her parents and only realized that her mother had been in debt after she turned 18. She found out that her mother had been borrowing money under her name illegally ever since she was a minor. She paid off this debt and apologized to everybody concerned.

IU, Purvabhadrapada Moon grew up in poverty. Her family fell into debt and she was raised by her grandmother who could barely take care of her and her brother. She saw little of her parents growing up. Its unclear how close they are now.

I realize just how many of them are nepo babies lol but I'm kinda glad because it means so much of their life is on public record. Its really unfortunate to see that so many of these natives had absent fathers or fathers who were present in their lives and very abusive.

[dimespin]

Saratoan Life Stages

The simple rule of thumb for guessing a Saratoan dragon's human-age is a kind of reverse dog years - divide their age by 2 and there you are. But as is the case with dog years, Saratoans develop on their own timeline.

They themselves understand their ages based on set of teeth, of which they can have a maximum of 7 across their lifetime.

First Teeth

The first set of teeth erupt shortly after the joey detaches from the mother's body about 6 months after the initial birth and arrival in the pouch. The joey is not yet old enough to permanently leave the pouch at 6 months but a few months later they will leave the pouch permanently and spend a few years clinging to their mother's back instead.

The development timeline for a joey has some similarities with human children (they start talking around the same time) and differences (they take their first wobbly steps as soon as they make their first venture out of the pouch around 6 months)

Compared to their extended lifespan these years are quite accelerated!

This set of teeth as well as the next lacks the pronounced canines the species is known for, very much looking like the teeth of what they are, an herbivore.

This set of teeth is shed at about age 6

Second Teeth

The next set of teeth are heavily associated with the age group called sub-adults, but they aren't officially considered sub-adults until age 15.

Sub-adults are still considered a type of child, but nonetheless are very independent. They are generally at similar levels of education as humans the same age, most of them work and many live away from their families full or part time.

Legally they occupy a separate category from either children or adults, with restrictions intended to protect them like lower legal working hours and it not being legal to sell them things like cigarettes, but they are also legally allowed to live apart from their family even if the family would prefer otherwise.

While they can earn professional certificates and credentials through education they are legally barred from many professional fields and must wait to use those credentials for adulthood. Because of this many take on apprentice or intern like jobs in their desired field to gain experience while waiting to be able to work in the field.

Despite the fact many of them work or are in college and can speak and think as you'd expect of a same-age human, they are known for being a bit childish, still having a drive to play, and sometimes still being emotionally immature and impulsive.

This is the stage at which their physical aging starts to slow down, so they do not hit their adult height until closer to when they get their next set of teeth. Growth does not completely stop but many sub-adults are markedly short compared to adults.

This set is shed at about age 30

Third Teeth

At age 30 Saratoans hit puberty and have their final growth spurt, reaching their adult height around the same time as their teeth start falling out and growing back in (for the Atau full adult height is usually reached around 35, but the tooth milestone and puberty still happens around the same time)

At this age they often become aware of their sexuality and between this and the expectations of whether or not they will reproduce, social roles within their culture are decided and imposed.

As they enter this age group there can be a lot of upheaval in their lives as they suddenly move from education to professional careers, move out, become parents, lose childhood friends and gain new ones, etc., depending on the individual

While they are culturally viewed as adults they are still often condescended to by older adults who view them as still being a bit wet behind the ears.

This set of teeth is shed at about age 65

Fourth Teeth

This set of teeth is associated with the approach of middle age. Normal adults generally dealing with life with now a significant amount of experience, but still with a huge population around them with more experience still.

This age group has a reputation for sometimes being annoying according to elders, as they are second only to sub-adults in their likelihood to rebel. This is the first time many of them have experienced adults (third teeth) showing them respect and following their lead on things, and this makes some start to view themselves as able to question those above them. This is especially annoying as this is also the time when many of them begin being trained for their future as house elders if they are in the position to take that role.

This age group and the next are the ones most likely to make a show of dominance smiling, as the tension between groups of adults who would otherwise be peers becomes heightened. Previous groups had no one to lord their age based social hierarchy position over but those they viewed as literal children, but now with other adults to pull rank on, the age based fights begin to reach their peak.

This set of teeth is shed at about age 100

Fifth Teeth

This set of teeth is associated with middle age and the time shortly after. Many start showing signs of aging during this time, with wrinkles and graying hair starting to appear.

During this time many start to see their fertility slowing down, with pregnancies becoming pretty much unheard of after age 130.

Many in this age group are already taking on important management roles within the house structure, as they are in the important position of both being old enough to command respect from many but still being fairly physically healthy and fit

This set of teeth is shed at about age 135

Sixth Teeth

The last set of teeth many Saratoans ever grow but not the last possible set. This set is associated with elders who are not the house leader. Often seen in the house leader's partner and eldest children within the house structure. Also often seen in older adults who choose to live outside the house structure system.

Saratoans health and signs of aging keep pretty stable from the previous age group through this one, accelerating much more around age 170, when they tend to lose the remaining color in their hair, thinning of the hair becomes visible on the arms and legs, and health decline and age related health conditions start to become a real problem.

This set of teeth is only shed under the circumstance of being left as the most dominant one within a family or group, often due to the death of the house leader when they were the next eldest individual.

Seventh Teeth

The last possible set of teeth when the canines become long enough they permanently protrude from the mouth at all times and unlike the other teeth are dry at all times. Because of this they are called tusks.

Tusked elders are stereotyped as very calm and patient and not interested in making a show of their dominance. They cannot meaningfully hide or reveal their teeth so they tend to relax about commanding respect simply for the sake of it as fourth and fifth teeth often do.

These teeth are only ever seen in the eldest dominant figure within a group. While it is technically possible to develop them after age 140, and much more rarely, as early as 100, it's more common to see them in individuals closer to 160 or more.

Saratoans generally live to be around 200, with the majority dying of old age closer to 190 or so, but still a few live past 200, with 210 being rare but not totally unheard of. There are rumors of even older individuals occurring but the records are sketchy

[feminismisstillahatemovement]

In 2017 I interviewed Bernadette Wren, then head of psychology at the Tavistock Gids clinic, and asked what effect puberty blocking drugs have on the adolescent brain. Looking highly uncomfortable, she replied that the evidence so far was only anecdotal but that the clinic would study its patients “well into their adult lives so that we can see”.

Even back then, before whistleblowers had exposed the rush to medically transition children, it was alarming to hear that heavy-duty GnRH agonists such as triptorelin — used to treat advanced prostate cancer and “chemically castrate” sex offenders — were being prescribed to arrest puberty in hundreds of children as young as 11.

Moreover, they were being used “off-label” before any clinical trials. And the long-term study Wren promised never materialised: Gids (the Gender Identity Development Service) routinely lost touch with patients, and the 44 it did follow reported little long-term mental health improvement.

This shocking chapter in medical history, where the ideological objectives of trans rights campaigners trumped the welfare of disturbed children, is coming to an end worldwide. The decision by NHS England effectively to ban the prescription of puberty blockers comes after the Cass review noted these drugs could “permanently disrupt” brain development, reduce bone density and lock children into a regime of cross-sex hormones requiring life-long patienthood.

NHS England unites with other national health services including those in Finland, France, Sweden and, most notably, the Netherlands — where the “Dutch protocol”, a regime of early blockers then hormones, was devised in 1998 — in pulling back from prescribing them.

Even in the United States, where a toxic combination of extreme activism and medical capitalism has pushed child gender medicine to grotesque extremes, with double mastectomies performed on 14-year-old girls, there is some retrenchment.

Leaks from the World Professional Association for Transgender Health, the body which formulates guidance on “trans healthcare”, reveal doctors perplexed at how they should explain to an 11-year-old child that drugs will render them infertile. Crucially, liberal media such as The New York Times are now reporting grave medical misgivings about child transition, once dismissed as a culture-war issue for the Republican right.

Yet the question remains: how was this ever allowed to happen? For years, puberty blockers were cheerily billed as a mere “pause button”. In 2014, Dr Polly Carmichael, the last head of Gids before the Cass review ordered its closure, went on CBBC in a show called I Am Leo, saying of blockers: “The good thing is, if you stop the injections, it’s like pressing ‘start’ and the body carries on developing as it would if you hadn’t started.”

The BBC permitted her to make this unevidenced claim to an impressionable audience of six to 12-year-olds. Imagine hearing this as a developing girl, freaked out by your new breasts and periods. No wonder Gids referrals subsequently rocketed.

Carmichael failed to mention that she did not know if pressing “restart” on puberty is always medically possible — it is not — and in fact, almost every child Gids put on blockers went on to irreversible cross-sex hormones.

After years in a Peter Pan state while their peers developed, they understandably felt there was no way back and forged on with treatment. Yet if allowed to experience natural puberty, almost 85 per cent of gender dysphoria cases resolve themselves.

Nor did Carmichael tell CBBC kids that the blockers-hormones combination, if taken early enough, not only results in sterility but kills the libido so that a young person will never experience an orgasm.

At the 2020 judicial review brought by a former Tavistock clinician and Keira Bell, the brave young detransitioner rushed onto hormones by Gids, judges expressed astonishment at Gids’s lack of an evidence base.

Reporting on this issue for seven years, I too have been struck by a complete clinical incuriosity. Not only was data not collected, but those who queried treatments or pressed for evidence faced angry condemnation. Perhaps activists knew what research might find because one long-term Finnish study, recently reported in the BMJ, destroyed the myth used to justify blockers: that a child will commit suicide if denied them.

The Finns found that “gender-affirming care” does not make a dysphoric child less suicidal. Rather, such children had the same suicide risk as others with severe psychiatric issues. In other words, changing bodies does not fix troubled minds.

Yet even after NHS England’s announcement, activists refuse to heed the now-overwhelming evidence. In its response, Stonewall persists with the myth that puberty blockers “give a young person extra time to evaluate their next steps”.

Many questions remain unanswered: will private clinics still be permitted to prescribe puberty blockers; and is Scotland’s Sandyford child gender clinic still determined to close its ears to all evidence? Plus, we have few details on how the NHS’s new “holistic” treatment for gender-questioning children will operate when it opens next month.

This repellent experiment — in which girls who like trucks or little boys who dress as princesses, and who invariably grow up to be gay, are corralled inexorably down a road towards life-changing treatments — belongs in the book of medical disgraces. As do the cheerleaders who raised money for Mermaids and those who persecuted whistleblowers or damned journalists asking questions as transphobic.

In 50 years, chemically freezing the puberty of healthy children with troubled minds will be regarded with the same horrified fascination as lobotomies — which, never forget, won the Portuguese neurologist Antonio Egas Moniz the 1949 Nobel prize.

--------------------

{Article source (behind paywall)}

[propertyofthefatui]

Father Dottore x Daughter Reader

TW !! Father-Daughter Incest, Noncon, Grooming, Experimentation, Use of Toys, Segment Orgy, Audience, Gaslighting, Manipulation !!

Finding yourself hiding in his lab coat during surgeries, fiddling with his pockets, minutes might as well be hours to a child like you, looking at all the machines he would work with, hiding behind his leg while surrounded in his lab coat as you stared up at the way his hands held a mutation of sorts. Being a child and witnessing all the colorful buttons on the various interesting machines, any child would be frustrated after so long, just standing still, waiting for your father to finish his surgery.

So you would often fall asleep by his foot, an adorable and amusing sight to him once he looked down to find your head snuggled against his boots, a genuine smile. Was his smile genuine because he genuinely adored your adorable behavior? — Or was his smile genuine because he admired himself for his intellect and brilliance that led to creating you?

Your adorable childish attitude has indeed amused him, unfortunately, you would most likely just get in the way of his mobility, most likely to affect the surgery. He placed his bloody instruments back down, the snap of the rubber as he took his stained gloves off echoed through the operation room. With a soft dark chuckle he scooped you into his arms before a segment took you away so you wouldn’t bother anything.

You were no stranger to experiments, regularly having scheduled checkups or surgeries to study you. As a child you were used to the cold, used to the cold air in his lab, the freezing sanitized metal table you would sit and lay on, even your fathers cold gloved hands. Your fathers segments within the room, studying you as their prime examined every bit of your body. Various x-rays and scans, even spreading your legs and examining your folds. You were no stranger to crowds of segments just observing you as you solved various advanced equations and riddles, testing your iq, eq, even creativity. Studying until the next day had been built into your schedule, your fathers segments often lecturing you on various scientific fields.

Unfortunately, like your father, you had no friends. Often alone and entertaining yourself with a book or with a piece of scrap machinery. When you were given the opportunity to interact with other children your age, you were baffled and disgusted by their lack of knowledge, making it almost impossible for you to communicate. Your father had always told you how different the two of you were from the rest of society, and you couldn’t help but be thankful for it. It wasn’t any different with adults either, treating you like a toddler. Often making comments about your wide vocabulary, often saying such things as ‘Oh, that’s such a big word!’ It was truly tiresome and so you chose to spend your time with your father.

Reaching into your preteen years your father began a new routine. Your body is changing and developing, afterall, he must examine his treasured creation, he would say.

Your naked body laid on the pristine white hospital bed. Vulnerable to his gaze, looking at your chest, he gazed down your torso and to your hips. Your figure had begun to develop, focusing his attention onto your stomach before dropping his gaze further down to your hips, observing the growth of your pubic hairs. You had been softly mewling to yourself as he poked and prodded at your skin. With a cold gloved hand, he grazed the side of your hip, a signal for you to flip onto your stomach, his hand slipping under your hips, bringing your ass up. He squeezed your ass, his thumb pulling back the soft skin to reveal your hole. He remained silent as he mentally took note of all the changes that he had observed, his eyes drifting back to your flushed face, he couldn’t help the mischievous smirk that crept onto his face.

“Someone’s a bit frustrated, aren’t we?” He teased, his deep dark voice made your knees weak, as if he was mocking you for being so aroused. His gloved hand softly rubbing your ass.

Already well versed with human anatomy and reproduction at a very young age, you didn’t show much interest in the traditional ways of reproduction. But your hormones were working against your mind, the carnal desire rising every second your untouched hole and clit ached. It was freezing but you felt so hot, with his hands touching your naked body while your ass was propped up to reveal more. He was obviously just toying with you at that point.

You were an intelligent child, you knew what your body wanted, so with a devilish grin his finger trailed your folds, earning an unexpected soft carnal moan of desire from you. A side of your face was buried into a soft white pillow. Your father was a cruel cruel man, you knew that much. You were so utterly wet, you desperately needed relief, so at a desperate attempt you rubbed your hand against your folds. You looked so pitiful. His little creation, his daughter, on her knees, with her ass up and face down, itching for release.

His lips to your ears, sending teasing little breaths down your neck, taking pity on you, he decided to give you an ounce of satisfaction. “Look at yourself, utterly pitiful. A shame we all must bend to carnal desires, don’t you think, my child?” He let his middle finger slip through your folds, rubbing your aching clit for you. You whined in response, hoping he would rub harder. “You’re familiar with the concept of masturbation but I suppose you’ve never had the urge to do so until now. Poor little thing, yet to discover the pleasures of the flesh… the feeling of coming, and wanting to do so until your vision fades. But not to worry your pretty little hole” He spoke as his index finger pressed up against your opening “I’ll teach you very very well…”

You soon felt his finger press harder against you, screaming as you felt him circle your entrance, he began to drag it up and back down slowly, with a certain rhythm. His thumb playfully toying with your swollen clit, rubbing circles around it. You were left weak and crying, your moans getting louder as a knot in your stomach began to build. Moaning to your father about the strange sensation while his other hand had been leisurely playing with your ass, squeezing and slapping it to his content. Everytime you sobbed about the sensation, he merely shut you down, repeatedly telling you “not yet” until finally, you heard him calmly say “go ahead…” And so you did, you let yourself come undone by just his hand. A scream left you as you rolled your eyes back. Your first orgasm, achieved by your fathers skills. He pulled his slick finger out, the insane thought of licking his finger covered in your orgasm came to mind, and since when was he one for being selfless? You rode out your high and let your body collapse back onto the bed. Your mind still dazed, all you could think about was the pleasure.

Since that day your daily routine had changed. He’s been more affectionate to you, you used to think nothing of it when he kissed your neck and jawline but after the day he opened your body to new overwhelmingly addictive feelings, arousal was always in the air. Everything became so utterly lewd to you, surprised to discover your new test were to use dildos, vibrators, even having to ride a segments face to ‘check your endurance’. You were becoming a whore for your father well into your preteens, your evenings with him spent in lewd activities. He absolutely adores seeing his most precious creation be needy for him. He records, or rather films everything. When the two of you are alone at home, he loves to film you riding him. While he’s lecturing you, your face is buried into the pillow as your eyes try and focus on the words on the page, his hips slamming against yours as his words fall deaf to your ears. Loves to play with your clit and finger you while you still wore your underwear when he’s bored doing some menial important documents he can’t trust his segments with.

He’s become a very affectionate man to you behind closed doors, before he goes on a long mission he makes sure to ruthlessly love and fill you up the night and morning before he leaves. It’s required that you must make out with him before bidding him goodbye. You’ve grown used to the constant sex and affection, so has he, becoming separated for a long period of time without your presence is unnerving to him. Ever since he created you he had looked after you, cared for you, made sure you were well loved. It was hard for both of you whenever he had no choice. But once left alone, you can’t help but doubt his affections, wondering if it was just another way of manipulation. But once his segments and himself showered you with affections yet again, you’re reminded that he did admire you, adored your very existence, in his own sick and twisted way.

[seireiteihellbutterfly]

Hi Vee!!! Omg congrats on hitting 300 I'm so happy for you!!

For your sundae tropes event i'd like to order a coffee waffle cone #3 with megumi!!!

Sundae Tropes : I Said Stay

A/N: Hey everyone! I know I kinda went AWOL over the summer but things are looking up and I'm finally able to write! Fic 2 of the Sundae Tropes Event! It's crazy to see that from the time I started this event till now my follower count has almost doubled!

Thanks for your patience Lee! I hope you enjoy this. 🩷

Sundae: Coffee Waffle Cone #3 With Megumi = Friends To Lovers + prompt “Don’t You Dare Walk Away Right Now!”

Follow along using #sundaetropes, #300followersevent and #vee writes.

Event masterlist | Vee's Masterlists

You were another lost child with cursed abilities fostered on the Gojo estate. It wasn’t uncommon for them to bring in strays, mostly waifs who were not associated with a sorcerer family and had nowhere else to go. 

Some whispered Gojo had taken the initiative after his best friend had adopted two young girls with cursed abilities before defecting from the jujutsu world, an extremely low point in his life that he had turned into an opportunity. 

Your arrival at the estate had been a few weeks after Megumi and Tsumiki had been brought in. And of course, as adults tend to do, they had bunched the three of you together since you were close in age. Tsumiki was more open than Megumi, your friendship guaranteed from the moment you laid eyes on each other. The lack of cursed energy felt from Tsumiki wasn’t a deterrent in any way, the both of you running to the playground or taking time to braid each other’s hair. Megumi was quieter, more stoic, and not the kind to enjoy swinging from the monkey bars or playing tag with the other children. 

In fact, Megumi rarely accompanied you and Tsumiki anywhere. The only time you two spent together was when you were in training, sometimes with Gojo, sometimes with a wizened old instructor who would bark criticism at you if you failed to follow instructions. You preferred Gojo who was laxer and made training into a fun pastime rather than the old man, but Megumi never cracked a smile or laughed during any of these sessions, quietly summoning his shikigami, unbothered by the praise Gojo showered on him. His technique was quite developed for someone barely 8 years of age, and you watched him with fascination. 

“Oh, does my young student have a crush on Megumi?” Gojo would often tease you when he’d catch you looking at Megumi during your training sessions, flustering you and sending your little heart into a panic.

“No! Why would I like him, he’s so weird and untalkative. No, not me! I don’t have a crush on him!” You’d deny vehemently, shaking your head no, causing Gojo to erupt with laughter and pat your head.

“Ok ok I believe you calm down,” he’d say reassuringly, grinning at the tears brimming in your large baby eyes. Megumi on the other hand, acted indifferent whenever this question was brought up, making you believe he hadn’t heard anything, watching his shikigami scurry about the room.  

Eventually, Gojo insists that you and Megumi would have to start sparring with each other to test your abilities. In a real battle, there would be no one calling out advice or instructions to help you. You faced Megumi in your yukata, fists raised and ready. You were nervous, and deep down, you couldn’t help but feel you weren’t any match for Megumi in the first place. Tsumiki and some of the other children gathered around to watch both of you, Gojo watching intently to make sure no one got seriously injured. 

Megumi summoned the divine dogs first, the pair of adolescent cubs growling and ready to attack. You prepare yourself as they approach you and to your surprise, your first hit lands true, blocking and stunning one of the wolves which whimpers and disappears back into shadow. Megumi looks unperturbed but you can see his jaw clenching before he directs the remaining wolf to tackle you. You dodge the first one but aren’t as lucky the second time as the wolf catches you and you land on your back winded. The wolf’s hot breath can be felt on your neck, and though you knew they wouldn’t really harm you, you couldn’t bear to imagine the idea of being defeated.

With a cry, you flip the wolf over and it backs away with a yelp, running towards Megumi to regroup. You chase after it, feet gaining speed, ready to slam it with all the energy you can muster when the wolf disappears like its sibling at the last moment. With a yelp, you crash into Megumi who had been too transfixed on the match to realize you were barreling in his direction.

You collide painfully into his slim frame and the both of you go tumbling down, Megumi’s dark eyes gazing up at yours in a daze. You had never been in such proximity with him. You were convinced he would be cold to touch, just like his gaze and his attitude, but he was warm, and looking flushed from having you so close. A few moments pass where the both of you are looking into each other’s eyes, stunned, before Megumi, turning a delicate shade of red, pushes you off.

“What’s the matter with you? Trying to kill me by sitting on my neck?” Megumi yells as he scrambles away from you, his own heart beating faster than normal. He tries to brush it off as being surprised but can’t seem to stop blushing. 

“I’m sorry, I was aiming for the wolf,” you try to explain through your embarrassment but Megumi is already retreating, his back to you as he walks away from the training ring. Gojo declared you the winner but that incident was the beginning of a neverending series of matches to one-up the other that followed you into your teens. That initial childhood match had broken the ice and you and Megumi had developed a competitive friendship, pushing each other to be the best sorcerers you could be. He’d grown into a tall, slim adolescent, his ebony hair erratically spiky no matter what he did to it.

“Is that all you got?” he taunts as his now fully grown demon dogs close in on you, their eyes glowing menacingly. You merely huff, readying your cursed energy in your palms. As usual, a crowd has gathered to watch and place bets, and you make out Inumaki, Yuta, and Maki senpai, as well as Nobara and Yuji who were in the same year as you. It was always difficult to predict who would be the victor in these matches. The statistics had you both at a tie, and some matches ended up astonishing everyone at the last minute about who had won. 

“Naw, I’m just saving my energy. Why waste it on something that isn’t a challenge?” You throw back, feeling your power surge. Megumi imperceptibly smiles, a subtle quirk of his lips before the wolves come dashing at you. It was more difficult to evade them now, they had grown so much, but thanks to agility training, you managed to dodge them a few times before raining down surges of gathered cursed energy on them. The wolves snarl, teeth bared, and try to dodge but your bursts of energy confuse them and not too soon, both of them take a wrong step and are hit by your technique. They lay on the ground, exhausted and unable to move. 

“She won again! Yes! 1000 yen to me!” The crowd begins to cash in on their bets as you look over at Megumi who is hiding his disappointment well. He walks over to you to shake your hand as was his custom after every match he lost.

“Great job. But to be fair, you only have that one technique. Someday the dogs will catch on and avoid it.”

“Oh don’t be so bitter about the fact that my technique can be used so broadly.”

“Why would I be bitter about only having one good technique? Your lack of variety will be your downfall one day.”

The back-and-forth wasn’t uncommon and both of you are grinning good-naturedly as you hurl insults at each other. There wasn’t any malice, just a shared camaraderie from your common past. Nobara and Yuji start to make their way towards you, clapping you on the back for your victory. 

“Oh don’t pout so much Megumi, you’ll get wrinkles,” Nobara says to the tall youth, putting her hands on his cheeks. Megumi immediately pulls his face away. 

“I wasn’t pouting. I was expressing my sadness that some people may never develop more than one cursed technique.” You roll your eyes at the comment. 

“You’re just jealous that my one technique is so strong and you need to summon multiple creatures to even have a comparable energy level.”

“I’d rather be diverse than one-dimensional.”

“Says the guy with only one expression.” You put a scowl on your face and cross your arms and Yuji laughs at the impression.

“That’s so you Megumi,” he says between breaths. Megumi is about to retort when Nobara pulls on his hand. A little too possessively and it has your grin faltering at the sight.

“Come on. I wanted to get boba tea. My treat, Megumi.”

“Why? I lost.”

“Because I don’t want to sit across a grumpy goth boy.” She looks over her shoulder and casually says, “You’re welcome to join us if you want to.” Nobara sounded normal but your girl senses could tell otherwise and you shake your head no. 

“Go ahead. I want to stay in tonight.”

“I can stay if you’re not coming,” Megumi starts but you shake your head, a little too vigorously. Your voice sounds artificially light.

“No! You guys have plans. Go right ahead!” Megumi frowns but is prevented from saying anything else as Nobara gives him another impatient pull. 

“Come on! Otherwise, all the good flavors will be gone!” There’s little you can do except watch her drag him away, and there’s a strange sense of emptiness inside you like you hadn’t won the match at all. Yuji sees your expression and his eyes widen in concern.

“You ok?”

“Oh, yeah. I’m fine!” You smile to mask the uncomfortable feeling settling in your stomach but the image of Nobara holding Megumi’s hand is burned into your mind. Had they always been that way? Since when was Megumi ok with casual acts of PDA like that?

Ever perceptive Yuji wasn’t deterred. “You don’t look ok. Are you sure? Did you want to go with those two?”

You shake your head. “Yuji, wasn’t it obvious that they wanted to go together? Just them?”

Yuji takes a minute to consider and makes a noise of agreement. “I suppose you’re right.” He glances at you then says, “You and Megumi have known each other a long time huh?”

“Yeah, we have. Both of us were fostered by Gojo sensei. We’ve known each other since we were kids. Trained our curse techniques together since we were like 9 years old.”

“It’s normal to feel a little jealous when your best friend makes friends with someone else.”

You snort. “Jealous? Me?” 

“Yeah. That’s what I thought anyway. Are you not jealous that your childhood friend is out having tea with someone and you aren’t with them?”

You feel your pulse quickening. “I’m not jealous. Megumi and I aren’t attached at the hip. He can hang out with whoever he wants.”

Yuji looks unconvinced but decides to back off. “All right then. Well, what do you want to do for dinner?”

You decide to order ramen and eat it in Yuji’s dorm. And though you laughed and joked with Yuji, you kept checking your phone hoping to see a text from Megumi. It never came. After bidding Yuji good night, you lay awake on your bed staring up at the ceiling wondering. You and Megumi had somehow become inseparable after that match so many years ago. It felt strange to be without him. When Gojo had told you you were going to Jujutsu High, the only thing consoling you about being separated from Tsumiki was that Megumi would be accompanying you. 

When had he found another friend that he wanted to hang out with? A girl no less? You sigh, feeling dejected. Nobara, with her pretty face, perfect hair, and princessy attitude. You had originally liked Nobara, but now the thought of her made you feel like you weren’t up to scratch, like you were inferior to her somehow. 

The concept of looking pretty for Megumi had never crossed your mind until now. Maybe Megumi did like well-dressed girls that cared about their appearance. But since when did you care about looking good for Megumi? You had gotten so used to him when you lived with Gojo that nothing fazed you. He’d seen you in pajamas, he’d seen you when you were sick, and when you were a ball of pain during your period. He’d seen you during so many moments where you were vulnerable and remained steadfast by your side that you’d never even considered trying to dress up for him.

Megumi was Megumi, the constant in your life after Tsumiki, and now, you felt unsteady, like he was being pulled away from you. Because wasn’t he a little more ‘yours’ and less ‘hers’ simply because you’d known him longer? Your thoughts swirl together, muddled until you fall into a restless sleep.

The next morning came too early and when you woke up, you felt hollow. You dragged yourself out of bed and got ready for the day thinking you could go to the cafeteria and get some breakfast before you started training again. You check your phone and see you had forgotten to charge it and it had switched off.

Dressed in sweats and flip-flops, your hair up in a ratty bun, you walk to the cafeteria and are relieved to see no one there you normally talk to, just some younger students who had their own clique. You decide on porridge and are about to take a bite from the steaming bowl when you’re distracted by the appearance of a tall brunette at the entrance. 

You freeze, spoon in hand as Megumi makes his way towards you feeling uncomfortably self-conscious about your appearance. Why did he have to find you like this? 

“Hey,” he says quietly, locking his fingers together before him.

“Hey.” Your mouth feels dry all of a sudden. You pick at your porridge to distract yourself. 

“You didn’t answer my text.”

Wordlessly, you pull out your phone showing him the blank screen, and comprehension dawns on his face. “Forgot to charge it huh?” he asks with a lilt in his voice. “That’s so like you. Can’t even remember to put your phone for charge without a reminder from me.”

Not in the mood for your usual banter, you clip out, “What can I say? I can’t always rely on you to remind me.”

Megumi raises an eyebrow at your tone. “Well someone woke up on the wrong side of the bed.”

Hostility enters your voice. “Didn’t you have anything better to do than come looking for me first thing in the morning?”

“I hadn’t heard from you. Forgive me for looking for my friend.”

“Like you care! Weren’t you out with Nobara all night?”

“Is that why you’re acting like this? Because I was hanging out with Nobara?”

“No.” You lie through gritted teeth. “We’re in high school now Megumi, do you think I care who you hang out with?” You see him flinch at your words and guilt whacks you in the stomach, causing you to tear up. The group of juniors were starting to give you funny looks from their table. You sigh and shake your head. 

“I don’t want to talk to you right now.” Abandoning your porridge, you sprint out of the cafeteria. Megumi remains where he is for a split second, dumbfounded, before racing after you. 

“Wait! Slow down! Come back here!”

You ignore his calls and continue making your way back to your dorm.  

“Don’t you dare walk away right now!” You hear the hurt in his voice but can’t bring yourself to face him like this, feeling and looking your worst. Emotional turmoil threatened to swallow you whole. When you get back to your room, you allow yourself to cry. 

*・゜・*:.。.*.。.:*・☆・゜

Yuji kept shooting you furtive glances during your classes for the rest of the week. Megumi had distanced himself since that incident and you sat several desks away from him. You ate alone and trained alone. It had been an isolating week and you felt like there was a brick wall between you both. Megumi seemed content to spend his time with Nobara, a fact that he wasn’t hiding, considering that she seemed to be glued to him at all times. 

Grateful for the weekend, you change out of your uniform into the coziest hoodie you had, then decide to wander off campus and eat from one of the food carts outside. Food fried in oil was the only source of comfort your brain could conjure at the moment. 

Your feet automatically took you to your favorite vendor, a yakitori place, and as usual, a line had formed in front of the cart. You make your way to the back of the line just as someone else also reaches the end, vying for the same spot. 

“Oh, sorry-” you start, then stare, gobsmacked as Megumi gapes down at you. Your eyes meet for a moment and it’s awkward, like you’ve forgotten how to say hello to each other. Unwilling to fight for the spot, you swiftly step away and stand behind him. Megumi glances behind his shoulder and sighs deeply.

“You don’t have to do that. We’re not strangers. Stand next to me.” 

Not expecting the invitation, you warily look at him as he gestures at the space next to him. “It’s fine, you’re only one spot ahead of me.”

Megumi huffs, and with a level of impressive maturity, says, “Please stop acting weird and get over here.”

Uncertainly, you step into line next to him, silence falling between you both as you wait your turn. “How are you?” You ask, trying to break the quiet. 

“Not so good. See a close friend of mine blew me off and won’t tell me why she’s upset. And then she has the gall to wear my hoodie out in public even though she’s supposedly mad at me.”

“Your hoodie…?” You check yourself and realize, you were indeed wearing his hoodie, the one you’d ‘borrowed’ from him God knows when. He hadn’t asked for it back and it had remained in your custody, simply because it was too cozy to return. Who knew you’d run into him here while you were wearing it?

“I’m sorry, I had nothing else to wear. I’ll give it back to you after I finish laundry this weekend.”

A strange expression flitters across Megumi’s face and he avoids eye contact. “I didn’t say I wanted it back,” he says in a low voice before taking a deep breath and continuing. “Are you really not going to talk to me?”

Your chest constricts and you try not to lose composure. Not here. Not now. “I didn’t say I wouldn’t talk to you. I just didn’t feel like talking this last week.”

“And you don’t think I deserve an explanation?” Megumi asks quietly and you hear the disappointment in his voice. “When did you decide that we can’t sit together or talk things out anymore?”

You swallow and give him a partial answer. “I thought you wanted to spend more time with Nobara. You guys seem to be getting really close these days.”

“Nobara?” Megumi shakes his head. “Nobara’s nice but how can she substitute you?”

You feel a gentle rise in your stomach, like warm liquid was being poured into it, making your heart beat a little faster. “You guys looked like you were having fun.”

“Nobara is a classmate. And a friend. But you and I have a history. How do you think anything can replace that?” A breeze passes through, ruffling both your hair.

 “I’m sorry,” you say in a soft voice. 

“Do you know how hard it’s been not being able to talk to you?” There’s a tone in his voice that has you raising your head carefully. 

“Are you saying you missed me?”

“Tsk. Yes. There? Are you happy?”

It felt like there were a thousand butterflies alive in your stomach all at once, their little fluttering wings threatening to pull you away into the air. 

“I don’t know about happy,” you say loftily, trying to hide the grin on your face. 

“You’re so bad at pretending.” Megumi bumps his shoulder into you, a typical teenage boy move and you return the action, bumping back into him, the tension between you both dissipating slightly.

“But one thing I don’t get is, why are you so mad that I was hanging out with Nobara?” The question catches you off guard, and you find yourself scrambling to form words.

“Oh, it’s nothing. She just seemed to be acting over-familiar with you. Holding your hand and stuff. You hated that as kids.”

“I’ve come to realize it’s not so bad.” The back of his hand brushes against yours as he says so, sending a skitter of electricity through your body. 

“Oh yeah? So you’ll hold hands with just anyone then?”

“Not just anyone.” Your breath catches as Megumi’s large hand gently pulls yours, his fingers entwining between yours. “Nobara doesn’t really hold hands. She sort of grabs and yanks. Now this,” he raises your joined hands, “Is what holding hands should look like.”

Acutely aware of the fact that you looked like a couple at this very moment you think of ways to free your hand, each more futile than the last. Megumi seemed perfectly comfortable, looking at the surroundings and moving forward towards the cart. 

When your embarrassment becomes palpable, your hand involuntarily jerks, trying to escape Megumi’s finger prison, but to no avail.  Unperturbed by the action, the lanky teenager looks at you with a raised eyebrow.

“Is holding my hand causing some sort of issue for you?” 

You’re aware of the rising heat in your cheeks and try to play it cool. “I just don’t want people getting the wrong idea of us.”

“And what might that be?”

“That we’re a couple.”

“Oh. Does holding hands automatically contribute to us being a couple?” Megumi looks at you with a glint in his eye. “Aren’t there other factors that might have people coming to that conclusion anyway?”

Your heart hammers away in your chest as you meet his eyes, trying to keep your emotions under control. “Like what?”

“Oh, I don’t know. Like the fact that you’re wearing my hoodie. And yes, it’s obvious it’s a boy’s hoodie because it’s oversized on you,” he adds as he sees you about to protest. “Or how about the fact that you’re blushing and despite me giving you a window to pull away, you’re still holding my hand?”

You look down and see that Megumi’s hand has gone lax and you could have very well used that opportunity to free yourself. Instead, your fingers are curled around Megumi’s, holding them at the very tips. As you’re about to uncurl them, Megumi’s draw them in closer and you’re back at square one. 

“So that’s it? You’re gonna hold my hand captive, and then everyone will just assume we’re a couple? Then what?” You ask sarcastically, your go-to defense mechanism. Megumi lets out a small laugh.  

“We could try actually being a couple.” Megumi’s eyes catch yours, and you’re in a trance, unable to look away. “Shocking, right?”

“But we! I! That’s not!” Incomplete splutters leave your lips as you try to process what he’d said. “Us? Be a couple?”

“Yes. Unless you don’t want to?” They’re one person away from reaching the cheerful-looking cart owner. A heavy pause hangs in the air. 

“I want to.” You finally admit and you draw closer to him, finding reassurance when he doesn’t move away. 

“Good. Because I want to, too.” 

*・゜・*:.。.*.。.:*・☆・゜

 Unknown to the shy couple now sitting on a bench and eating their yakitori, Nobara watches them like a hawk, an exasperated Yuji hovering behind her.

“Why are we spying on them? If you like Megumi, then you should have said something.” Yuji chides to her, uncomfortable at his actions.

“Who says I like Megumi?” Nobara looks at him, wrinkling her nose. 

“Then what was with all the flirty moves and asking him to get tea with you?”

“All part of my master plan. Those two are so into each other, but too stubborn to admit they like each other.”

“Wait, what?” Yuji looks stunned. “You knew they liked each other but went out of your way to spend all that time with Megumi?”

“Yes! Because I knew Megumi would never confess, but a jealous girl always gets the ball rolling.”

“That’s…a little messed up but smart.”

“What can I say?” Nobara crosses her arms over her chest, looking proud. “I’m a girl’s girl. I like creating happy endings.”

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[cripplecharacters]

I have a character with paranoid schizophrenia who starts the story not being medicated and doesn't really want to be so far.

She has frequent auditory hallucinations since childhood, but she likes them and has friendly bond with them.

I've done a lot of research on how different people lead with their auditory hallucinations, and chose to take this approach because they're usually always portrayed negatively in media when that is not the case for everyone who experiences psychosis.

What I'm wondering is if it would be alright for her to want to seek treatment later on. In the world she's currently in (fantasy setting), there's no way she can consult with a health care professional nor get actual medication, but she can seek healing magic which would have a similar effect to antipsychotics.

I wanted to know if it is alright for me, as someone who is not on the schizospectrum, to portray her symptoms getting worse and more overwhelming over time and have her make the decision to seek help.

Being neurodivergent, I know how wrong people can get the relationships we have with our conditions, and I also know not everyone would like to see certain struggles be shown in media. However, I would like to show both the good parts of her condition (how important the voices are to her) as well as the less good parts, always as carefully and respectfully as possible, of course.

Thank you already for your time and for this amazing blog! It has been very useful to me.

Hello there, friend!

There are obviously a lot of ways to experience relationships with auditory hallucinations or any symptom of psychosis and schizophrenia specifically. I have friends with psychosis and with schizophrenia or schizoaffective specifically who have decided against taking medication - there are also people with these disorders who have decided against medication but been given medication anyways.

It is also possible for someone to have symptoms for a while that get worse - for schizophrenia and schizoaffective specifically there is usually a period called prodrome or the prodromal phase where certain negative symptoms (symptoms that take away such as lack of affect or lack of energy, difficulty with hygeine, and so forth) become more pronounced and light psychotic symptoms develop until they become more severe in the "active" phase of the disorder.

as for having symptoms as a child that get severe in late teenage years or young adulthood...it is possible. There are multiple people I know, including myself, who had psychotic experiences as a younger child that later turned from magical thinking and odd experiences to active psychosis later. But I do want to stress that childhood schizophrenia is much more rare than it is often represented in media, and often more severe than how it shows up as an adult. Your character would likely have psychotic experiences but not full-blown active psychosis or schizophrenia until later. I also want to add that sometimes children have experiences that may seem odd and that is not always disordered, even in a character with a thought disorder!

However, with that in mind - having symptoms get from comforting to disturbing enough to seek help is absolutely a narrative that happens, and I think it's a great one to include in the character.

One last small thing - paranoid schizophrenia may or may not be used depending on where in the world the story takes place or when the story takes place. The DSM-5 no longer puts schizophrenia into subtypes but the ICD still does! Something to think about.

-Mod Bert

[lilyginnyblackv2]

One of the oddest “Anya is better than Miri” takes I’ve seen so far was over on Twitter, and someone said they only liked Anya because she was a child character with agency (implying that Miri doesn’t have agency).

(Going to preface this by saying that I haven’t watched Spy x Family and personally just have no desire too, so I’m not even going to focus on the Anya aspect, just the Miri stuff, since that is all I really know).

Okay, well, from a sociology standpoint, most four year old children just don’t have much agency. Here is the definition of it:

We are only going to focus on the bold part: “In social science, agency is the capacity of individuals to have the power and resources to fulfill their potential.”

What is explained above is something entirely dependent upon the parents and their job/jobs and social standings. A child has no say or influence in that really. They are still very dependent on their parents and are still just learning too much. Kids in the four year old age range may not even know right from wrong yet or, if they do, they have a very black and white and basic understanding of it (usually based around rules - like what we see with Miri in Episode 6).

But, that person was likely talking about on a literary level. The literary definition of “character agency” is:

We are only going to focus on the bold part once again, which is: “’Character agency’ in fiction is used to describe the ability a character has to take action to affect the events of the story.’” 

The comment about the lack of agency with Miri was made before Episode 5 comes out, which is when we see her personality really starting to show through, and we see the series developing her more as a fully realized character, rather than just a plot device. But even before that, we still saw Miri have agency within the series. Since lack of agency usually means that things happen to the character, rather than them actively causing something to happen. Miri has independently and actively caused a number of things to happen in Buddy Daddies. Such as:

In Episode 1, she independently and actively chooses to go into the elevator when she sees the cake...literally setting off the entire plot.

In Episode 2, she independently and actively chooses to disobey Kazuki’s words to stay in the car and go ring the doorbell to use the bathroom. This completely messes up Kazuki’s plan and causes a huge shift in the series itself, since it results in Kazuki and Rei being jobless for a bit.

In Episode 3, Miri independently and actively searches out Rei and has a fairly deep (for a four year old) discussion with him about smiling and making “pain” go away. She later has another deep (for a four year old) discussion with him, that results in him thinking about his upbringing and what it means to be a “Papa.” These discussions in turn affect Rei’s decision to be Miri’s “Papa” alongside Kazuki. Thus, once again, majorly shifting the story.

Those are just three examples, and yes, Miri’s decisions usually end up affecting Kazuki and Rei, but that’s because she is their child and they are her parents. Miri is given a personality and agency that is at a realistic level for a four year old. So this argument just makes no sense to me, unless you are expecting the same level of complexity and agency with a four year old child character as you would get with an adult, teen, or even pre-teen/older child character. Which just seems silly to me, tbqh.

[anewstartrekfan]

Reading an old Star Trek book and to my surprise Jim Kirk has always had Daddy issues

So the only Star Trek book I’ve read was the one explaining how the tribbles episode was made and the aftermath, so trying to read Enterprise (1986) with some basic knowledge of trek post 2009 is fascinating. Cuz you see where the breadcrumbs of some of the characterization and even backstory come from.

In chapter 2, Sam Kirk and Kirk’s mom show up to Kirk’s ceremony where he takes command of the enterprise. They talk about George Kirk Sr. being in Starfleet, (he’s dead here too) something that I don’t think was in any of the episodes or movies. And how he was always distant and away. And they’re clearly going for some parallels/dramatic irony with the Wrath of Khan when it comes to Kirk not believing he could’ve developed a relationship with his father as an adult. And it plays into the tragic aspect I love about Kirk.

Upon reflection he’s happy that Carol rejected him (he proposed to her in chapter 1) because he doesn’t want to leave anyone behind while on the job, only returning for sparse visits the way his father did. But at the same time, Jim craves companionship. And he can’t get it in his current job because as captain, it is not ethical for him to date anyone else on the Enterprise.

Anyway the long and short is if we take this book into account, Kirk has always had daddy issues. It’s just in TOS EU it was abandonment issues whereas in 2009 it was dad sacrificed himself so high expectations issues.

The little details like the mom’s name getting carried over into the aos movies are a good touch, but then seeing George Kirk being a Starfleet officer actually get incorporated into the 2009 movie as an important plot point, and then also using his absence in Kirk’s life but just in a different way as part of Kirk’s backstory is so cool to me.

A difference though is unlike fanfic tropes, Winona is actually a good mom and wants Jim to succeed in his career where his father failed in his Starfleet career. Unfortunately though Jim appears to be falling into the same pitfalls. As in lack of communication and unwillingness to play workplace politics.

That last burn from Winona tho… like damn girl I felt that.

Another thing I want to backtrack to, Sam Kirk. Sam being the alleged chosen child, the one that was supposed to follow in George Kirk’s footsteps but didn’t, and then Jim strolled in and did even more than what Sam was supposed to do, and Sam and George never reconciled. Like dudes this book is almost 40 years old and this stuff was in strange new worlds last year. Tho xenobiology appears to have morphed into xenoanthropology (tho according to the fan wiki he’s still a biologist so idk what the deal is)

For the record Sam’s characterization isn’t remotely the same here. Likely the choice to keep him out of Starfleet all together removed any sort of resentment of Jim potential like he has in SNW. There’s still tension though, as Sam tries to force Jim to confront why he’s reacting like this to his first mission for the enterprise being an escort job for a flying horse.

Shifting gears back to Jim needing to learn how to play workplace politics. The assumed reason for Pike leaving the enterprise. While SNW is doing the whole, Pike knows he won’t fly the enterprise forever and about the disfigurement and is cool with it, I find if fascinating that he’s more, sad about it here and that he got promoted out of the way for pushing too many buttons. It would be a sad ending but I wonder if SNW would incorporate that into its eventual ending. Hell I wonder if that’s what happened to Kirk between TOS and TMP.

Anyway big picture is this book is a fascinating time capsule and it’s fun seeing just how much has stuck around over the years both in fandom and in the franchise itself. Whether or not that’s the book’s doing is questionable but still. Fun to think about.

[hyperlexichypatia]

What some of y'all call "recovery" and "healing" is just... growing up.

The theme I keep coming back to, the theme I keep writing about over and over, is the inextricability of ableism (specifically neurobigotry) and ageism.

The pathologizing of youth. The infantilizing of disabled adults. The structuring and micromanaging of childhood leading to ever more opportunities for "deviancy" to be classified as "disordered." The "neurological" push to raise the age of majority. The constant framing of disabled parents and caregivers as "unfit" or "bad influences" on children. And on and on.

Ageism and neurobigotry are such an interconnected tangle loop mobius strip that people are using the "healing"/"recovery" framework for basic human maturation.

When you were little, you uncritically accepted the worldview of your parents and other adults in your life, but now that you're older and "recovered," you see it differently?

That's called growing up. You grew up.

When you had less information and experience informing your worldview, you saw things one way, and now that you've "healed," you see things differently?

That's called learning. You learned new information and changed your perspective accordingly.

Look, learning and change and growth and maturation are (or should be) lifelong processes with no endpoint, and one of the cultural factors making people so weird about "maturity" and age of majority issues is the assumption that a "Real Adult" is in their fixed final form. So people think "If I've changed and grown in the past 5 years, that means that 5-years-ago Me was Still A Child and should not have been allowed to make major life-altering decisions," and also think that once they reach An Endpoint, they can or should stop changing. And that's a problem.

But. But. Changes in one's relationship to oneself and one's family of origin are especially common during times of major transition. That's not pathological. That's not even abnormal. If you see the world differently than you did before a major life transition, that does not mean that you went from a diseased state to a nondiseased state ("recovery"), or from an injured state to an uninjured state ("healing"). Time passed. You got older. Everyone else got older. You changed. Other people changed. Your family changed. The social context in which you live changed. The pathology paradigm has no place in this phenomenon.

People are out here saying that "People should heal themselves before they have their own children," and then when asked, what they mean by "heal themselves" is "learn how to effectively communicate with children." That. That is a skill. Learning a skill is not "healing." Lack of a particular skill set is not a disorder you have to "recover" from. You just have to learn the skill.

But that's also why when we say "You don't have to recover from your disabilities, recovery isn't a moral obligation," people say things like "You want to use your disability as an excuse not to change and grow."

My good bitch, what does change and growth have to do with recovery?

And this isn't even a new observation, because people have talked about how parents of developmentally disabled children will credit "therapy" and "recovery" for their children's natural developmental trajectory (if your child gained a skill after a year of intensive therapy, that doesn't mean "the therapy worked," that means they got older and developed the maturation to acquire that skill). A lot of the rhetoric around early childhood education does the same thing (the reason your 6 year old can hold a pencil now and he couldn't last year is because his bones got stronger and his fine motor skills improved, not because his high-quality preschool made him ready to compete).

But this. This is adults doing it to themselves! And it's so very original-sin-coded. You are born Unhealthy, but through continual effort and right practice, you can Recover and Heal.

No! You just grew up!

[scoobydoodean]

Honestly I think that a lot of the reason why people view dean as abusive towards jack is because they genuinely think of him as a baby/toddler and not someone with the cognitive abilities of an older teenager/young adult who just happens to not really know much about the world. Obviously there's more to it because people ignore that cas wanted to put jack in the cage and sam wanted to use his power, but I stumbled across a post the other day about how they (the writers and the characters) should've given jack a capri-sun instead of a beer because he's a "literal toddler"... which is just completely incorrect and considering he has the body and brain development of someone who's older, there's no reason to not give him a beer. (also is anyone really a dad unless they give their 3 yr old a beer /j)

Context

It's funny because the whole point of the beer scene is to establish that Jack is not a child and that treating him like one would be ridiculous.

[DEAN grabs and opens a bottle of beer. JACK imitates him.] DEAN Wait, wait, wait, wait. How old do you think you are? JACK 3 days, 17 hours, and 42 minutes.

(From 13.02)

When Jack proves that he has such an advanced understanding of communication and time and such an unusual awareness of exactly how much time has passed, Dean immediately realizes that treating him as if he's a baby makes absolutely no sense because he clearly isn't one. Treating him like a child would be infantilizing, and we see Jack rebel against the notion that he's a baby a few times.

There's some push I think to separate Jack's intellectual abilities from his emotional coping abilities, but even these I think are more or less on track with other young adolescents around the age he presents himself to be when controlling for traumatic experiences. Jack's initial emotional regulation abilities don't read like those of a toddler, but of a young adult who's confused and upset and has been through a lot. Without powers in the mix that he doesn't know how to control, his emotional regulation abilities seem fairly standard for boys his age (at least to me). I don't think for example, that the anger he experiences and the reasons he experiences that anger can be equated with toddler-like tantrums, and any other person whose been around a toddler and sees what kind of things make them furious knows what I mean.

Granted, there are things Jack is naive about that are probably connected to him being "born yesterday". We see this early on when Asmodeus tries to manipulate Jack into opening a hell gate. At the same time, this interaction also highlights Jack's innate sense of right and wrong as a counterbalance. I personally find it frustrating when people try to take away Jack's understanding of right and wrong (rooted in his love for others) and cast him as a baby to the extent that he isn't even capable of understanding the golden rule, when Jack shows over and over how seriously he takes the personhood of other people and the weight of their lives. This is what allows him to see through Asmodeus's trickery in a very confusing situation, simply realizing, "you're hurting my friends". Jack using his care for others as a foundation to navigate Asmoedus's trickery also serves as excellent contrast to soulless Jack in 14.19. Soulless Jack was not able to grasp that Dumah was manipulating him because he was missing this crucial piece of himself—his love for other people including strangers. Because he was lacking that part of himself at that time, he was unable to grasp that filling someone's body with worms for not wanting to be turned into an angel is horrible and cruel and couldn't be a good thing. His naivety played a role in what happened, but it was the crucial missing soul that actually allowed this situation to transpire. I think a lot of people just straight up think normal Jack also would have been manipulated into killing people for Dumah in this circumstance and I really just don't think that's true at all.

[lilliaace]

I have zero idea how old you are, so I'm going to try to make this as easy to understand as possible.

Keep in mind, I'm 30, been involved heavily in the BDSM community since 2012, and am a health educator, kink educator, and fetish educator. WITH THAT OUT OF THE WAY (and having worked in healthcare for damn near 10 years), let's get into it.

There are SAFE ways to explore potentially rough or 'dangerous' quirks, kinks, fetishes, and/or BDSM related curiosities that DO NOT involve fantasizing and/or romantcizing serious harm to people.

Case in point, the porn community has RUINED and destroyed the fact that there's an actual difference between "CNC" (consensual non consent"), "free use", and "rough sex". Let's educate EVERYONE here so there's no "but what about"-isms.

Free use: Consensually telling your partner "you can have sex with me any time outside of barrier/parameters pre-established (like can only occur inside the home), but the scene can stop at any time if I drop a safe word (like "pineapple" for lack of better phrasing, thanks Tiktok).

Rough sex: Roughly engaging in sexual acts with partner, often involving teeth, scratches, some kind of impact play device (like a paddle or whip), possible electrical play (like a tens unit or violet wand), possible fire play (with proper safety involved to not leave serious burns), possible ice play (again, proper safety to not leave permanent damage), etc. THERE IS A STRONG EMPHASIS ON SAFETY AND CONSENT to keep everyone as safe as possible. Some communities refer to this as "edge play" as in "you're walking the knife's edge with safety". But some people interpret "edge play" as "orgasm denial and control", so read the context when you come across this type of play. Safe words can still be dropped to end a scene.

CNC (consensual non consent): Formally known as biastophilia, it is the fetish or kink (strong orgasm desire) to sexually harm a cause serious injury to a partner. It can be as 'light' as SEVERE verbal degradation (not going to put explicit examples here, think of a verbal abuser from a partner that involves dehumanizing) or as severe as rape/sexual assault (forcing your organ in them), broken bones, etc. When it come to the porn scene, a lot of CNC scenes are DIFFICULT to shoot (attempt rape, gang rape, rough shoving between sexual partners, severe sensory overload OR deprivation, attempt kidnapping, blow jobs to the point of vomiting, potential no lube anal sex, organs prolaping on the penis due to trauma, etc.). There is a reason why even PROFESSIONAL ACTORS in the adult industry (XXX) have serious trouble shooting a lot of these scenes and require SIGNIFICANT aftercare. MANY tap out, again due to the psychological natural consequences that happen during these scenes.

Once you are legally of age (again, I'm making this post for a safety perspective for ALL blog viewers here), you can SAFELY and LEGALLY navigate BDSM circles to learn HOW to manage all three above (Fet...e, local workshops, local munches, reading books about how to do these things safely, watching interviews online with real performers and sex workers of all kinds, safely navigate XXX spaces online, etc.).

If you are legally a minor (17 and younger for most areas, it's when a court no longer deems you a dependent on your parent/guardian figure, NOT age of consent), STAY THE FUCK OUT OF THESE SPACES UNTIL YOU ARE OF LEGAL AGE! It is fine to have curiosities, fantasies, kinks, fetishes, etc. develop during your pre-teen and teen years because your hormones are going crazy. IT IS NOT OKAY to force yourself into these adult spaces.

Child predators(creeps) exist, point blank. Adults who want to do horrible things to pre-teens and teens exist, point blank. We want to keep minors out of these spaces TO KEEP Y'ALL SAFE. Stop pretending that "you're the exception" to grooming or anything like this. YOU ARE NOT. Child predation is an EPIDEMIC online for a reason.

DO NOT FORCE YOURSELF into BDSM spaces, kink spaces, and/or fetish spaces online. IT IS FOR YOUR OWN SAFETY!

For the love of fuck, drop the radqueer bullshit that's just straight up albeist nonsense and a slap in the face to those who suffer from these real life horrific things that often lead to severe cptsd, ptsd, potential victims of child trafficking, victims of child creeps/predators, etc.

People have sadism thoughts. People have masochistic thoughts. It's about HOW YOU LEARN to SAFELY navigate these waters with a CONSENTING partner when BOTH of you are legal adults. This is why BDSM safety workshops and spaces online exist.

[sixofwandsss]

PAC: what does the future hold for you?

1-2

3-4

“Take 3 deep breaths and allow your inner wisdom to guide you”

Pile 1

You are growing into a version of yourself that is actually in touch with their life purpose. From a you that’s tired of not being satisfied with their accomplishments, to a you that is feeling grateful in the present moment and feels happy with themselves.

In order to tap into this energy you might need to leave behind the lack mindset you picked up from past experiences. You have to believe that you are abundant. The universe will have your back, don't worry. Ask yourself: “What if everything just went right?”

In this future, you are extremely determined and in touch with your 'leader' energy. You will find the will to carry on, you’ll find the passion, you’ll find the fire. You and your loved ones will be secure.

The insecurity, the feeling of being unsuccessful and the sleepless nights will come to an end once you let go of past burdens and give yourself the chance to heal them all

Affirmations: 

I am allowed to have faith in myself

My past does not and will never define me

My fears are valid but I choose to be brave and move forward anyways

Pile 2:

The future holds peace of mind for you; A break from all the conflict you might have been surrounded by for a while now. You will get a chance to rest.

You are going to learn to prioritize self-care and step into your empress energy as you get away from toxic environments.

The future offers a safe place to heal your inner child and develop a stronger sense of confidence. Get ready to feel yourself to the max!

You will probably meet your soul tribe then: people you share an intuitive connection with and who also respect your boundaries

Affirmations:

 I am proud of my journey and how far I’ve come

Today I will celebrate enjoying the fruits of my labor

I am allowed not to take my life so seriously

Pile 3:

The future brings you the opportunity to reflect on things that left a mark on your heart in order to understand the divine purpose behind it all. Sometimes we are put through painful experiences so as to learn something about ourselves and others.

The universe is giving you the opportunity to face those dark repressed emotions in order to heal parts of yourself that were not given enough attention but are actually affecting your perspective on life much more than you'd think.

You can't move through life without acknowledging this part of you. Even though it's unstable and chaotic, it is still a part of you.

"A composed soul is not necessarily a calm one"; Give more space to the untamed part of yourself that wants you to feel raw emotions without needing to intellectualize them

The future you that has gone through this process achieved a lot of wisdom and it's not "lost child" anymore. They integrated both their adult self and their wounded inner child. You will get through this succesfully.

Affirmations:

I honor all parts of myself, especially the chaotic and illogical ones

I forgive myself for being afraid, I forgive myself for not wanting to be vulnerable

Hardships gifts wisdom. How is this situation serving my growth?

5:55

Pile 4:

Your heartbreak will be over soon. It is almost over, my dear. The future offers you a life without the burden of a heavy heart. You are going to get over that person successfully.

In the past you couldn't imagine a life without them but in the future, darling, it's all about you. You as the center of your life. You as the main character.

Even though you might have lost them, you are going to gain self-trust again my darling, the knowing that you can bounce back from every situation no matter how painful it is.

You will connect to your inner wisdom and learn how to trust your instincts; you will shift your perspective as you become more in tune with your intuition. You’ll reserve your energy to those who you truly trust.

Affirmations

I am grateful for everything I overcome in order to reach this point in my life

I am allowed to take what I've learned and apply it into this new chapter of my life

It is safe to let go of a rigid and old mindset

Affirmations by Kitty Knorr " Tarot Affirmations: Self-Fullfilling Prophecies"