#y'all can disagree with my perspective

[destinyc1020]

My Movie Review: "Challengers" 🎾

**Caution...May Contain Some Spoilers**

Okay okay..... Here we gooo! Another film review.... 😁🙌🏾

Y'all.... I have so much to say about this movie lol. 😅 I'll just be honest, like...I had some mixed feelings about this one!

Okay, so first of all.... I had a great time going to see this movie. My girlfriends and I all went to one of those theaters where you can order REAL food and alcohol, and they bring it right to your seat. 😁 We decided to treat ourselves to this one, and just have a "girl's night out" watching it.

Our little theater was quite packed too! Saw a lot of date-night couples watching this together lol. 🤭 I think I saw another group who was doing a girl's night out.

So anyway....

The movie ended up being an enjoyable rollercoaster for all of us lol. It definitely kept my attention, it wasn't boring at all, and it gave many of us several things to talk about/discuss long after the movie was over! I LOVE films that make you think, and that have you talking about it afterwards. Even if we disagree, it's just nice to see a movie like this that sparked a good discussion afterwards. 😊 Here were my Pros/Cons and random thoughts that I had during and after this movie lol....

PROS

Everyone's acting was solid in this! I already knew that Mike and Josh are stellar actors (I've seen them in other projects before, and both have done theater if I'm not mistaken), but ZENDAYA!! Zendaya babeeeee....She surprised me in this one! Dare I say it?? I think "Challengers" was her best acting job yet on the big screen. 👏🏾 She really embodied that "Bad B*itch"/Boss vibe very well imo. She was definitely believable! LOL 😅

The CINEMATOGRAPHY! Omg the cinematography in this film was so good and on point. I loved how the camera would change perspectives during a match (especially the end match) and would switch and show you the ball's pov, then the pov of the players, and whatnot. It was dizzifying switch and camera change for sure lol, but it was very creative. I honestly think that this film could be nominated for an Oscar just for the cinematography alone. 😊👍🏾

The music .... The music was a pro AND a con (more on that later) for me. It had a really hype techno beat throughout the movie, and that really helped to keep the movie hyped and show the fast-pace of the sport. I really liked it! It was catchy lol. 😅

Zendaya was GORGEOUS in this movie! I kept looking at how flawless her skin was in this. It's so rare that we get "adult" Z in her films lol, so it was just nice and refreshing to see her finally playing more of an adult in a big screen role, and seeing her be the desirable/sexy/attractive one in a film for a change. She really looked amazing in this. 😊 I'd love to see her do more roles where she's playing the object of desire. We need more woc in roles like this.

I loved the subtle ways in which Luca shows that tennis is basically like a relationship in this film. I loved that metaphor. I think the little subtle hints for the movie were quite creative, and it's one of those films where I think it would be good to watch at least twice in order to catch more of the subtleties and how the sport related to their relationships and inner dynamics throughout the film.

I LOVED that scene where Patrick and Tashi met up with each other, and it's so WINDY and wild. Just like their relationship.... Windy, unpredicatable, destructive, yet exciting... Unlike her boring relationship with her husband lol. LOVED the subtleties in this film.

I loooved seeing Zendaya in her "Bad Gal" element. Yaaass! 👏🏾 I love it! I think it's harder playing a villain or someone who's not redeeming honestly.

Hahaha I have to give a shoutout to Darnell.... Good seeing him on the screen. Glad he was able to add another big major film on the big screen to his roster lol. 😜

Zendaya's body was BODY GOALS in this film.... 🔥 Can I just say?? I was like, "Dang.... let me keep going to the gym". 👀 And then, the other thought I had was, "Shooooot....no wonder Tom came back ROTFL." 😅🤣 Lemme stop lol.

I loved the anticipation for the final match, and it really kept you on the edge of your feet lol. 😁

CONS

Now for the cons.... 👀

Was it just me?? Or, sometimes the music in this movie was a bit TOO loud Lol. For example, there was a scene where Patrick and Tashi were talking in the hotel, and the techno music is SO LOUD that I could barely even make out what they were saying (and it seemed important too). Maybe it's just me.... But at times, the music was drowning out the dialog, and I didn't like that. Anyone know what Patrick and Tashi said to each other at the hotel when the music got to be so loud lol? 😅

I STILL hate that "my little white boys" line ...UGH! It's SO CRINGGGGGE! 😫😩🙈

I definitely saw a LOT more sausage and moons than I expected to see in this movie lol... 👀 😅 I meannnnn.... Idk... Is male frontal nudity EVER really necessary?? Let's be honest lol. I honestly don't think so. I kind of wonder why it's even needed?? (I say the same thing about female frontal nudity as well). Idk, sometimes I wonder why certain directors make that choice to add that in, when it's not even necessary 9 times out of 10. I just don't like things being done gratuitously . Like, gratuitous sex scenes for example.

I'll be honest, I didn't really care too much for some of the plotlines and writing in the film.... 😬 I'll also just come right out and say it... I kind of wish that Z had done a slightly different film than this for her big-screen lead role debut. I kind of wish it weren't such an "adult" film with a ton of sexual themes and elements. I kinda wish too that Tashi was not personified in the way that she was. It's one thing to be a very determined and dedicated athlete, but another thing altogether to be the stereotypical cold, icy, attitude-having diva. I also look at this from a woc/black woman's pov as well. Part of me feels like we as Black women are so hypersexualized (and seen as "grown") , and stereotyped as having "attitudes" from such a young age, and it just makes me feel like women/female actresses shouldn't have to get naked or be overly sexualized in order to win awards or get good critical acclaim for their roles. (I read that the film Emma Stone won an Oscar for this year, "Poor Things", had a lot of sex and nudity in it as well....🥴) Don't get me wrong, I'm not a "prude", but when it comes to WOC, I just want better for us since we're already so stereotyped and stigmatized. Like, why couldn't Z's big-screen lead role debut be the Ronnie Spector Biopic film?? Or, why couldn't it be a film like "Hidden Figures" where she's playing a black female mathematician who aids in the space launch? I don't feel like you have to resort to sex or get undressed in your underwear to be taken "seriously" as a "serious actor", but maybe the meaty roles for adult women in Hollywood that don't add that in are really scarce. Anyway, that was my only gripe. 😊

RANDOM THOUGHTS & QUESTIONS

When people claimed that there wasn't any real redeeming character in this film...boyyyyy...they weren't KIDDING!!! 🤣 I don't mind characters who aren't perfect or aren't the best though, so that didn't bother me. My only question was.... Why on earth did Tashi hate Patrick so much?? Does anyone else know?? 😅 I kept waiting and waiting during the movie to see some big REVELATION of something really HORRIBLE that he did to Tashi in order to deserve the type of hate that she dished out to him, but I couldn't figure out anything?? I mean, I know they dated each other at one time when they were younger, but I don't see why she's still hating on this man in her 30's when they dated in their teens and early 20s lol. 😅 She's out here married and even has like a 6 year old kid and is STILL hating on this man.... WHY?? 😅 Can someone PLEASE explain that to me?? Cuz right now, I can only surmise that the only reason why Tashi is so mean to Patrick is because deep down, she's still attracted to him, so she has to hate on him in order to curb that HAHAHA. 🤣 Maybe I'm just a Patrick-sympathizer lol, but I can't really see how he was a bad boyfriend or how he did anything wrong?? Yes, he shouldn't have slept with Tashi (Art's WIFE), but HE was single.... TASHI was the one married, so really, SHE was the main one at fault here as far as I'm concerned lol. 😅

Why did Art and Patrick like Tashi so much?? I mean, aside from the fact that she was gorgeous (obviously lol)....She seemed like such a ballbuster and treated them like crap lol.

Mike has a cute butt lol 🤭

Josh does a really good American accent. I only heard it go out and switch off like maybe once or twice lol. Only slightly lol. 😅

BTW, in case you were wondering...I'm Team Patrick lol.... 🤭 He was just a washed up bum of an athlete lol. I feel like Art and Tashi were way more manipulative. Jmho. I do kinda feel bad for Art though on some level, cuz it was CLEAR Tashi was in a boring, lifeless marriage and didn't really love him anymore lol.

I saw people in our audience gasping and covering their mouths during some of the sexual scenes lol. I could tell a couple of the girls in the theater were fans of Zendaya and had never seen her in such a role before hahaha. Some were laughing at some of the sexual stuff and it was like uncomfortable laughter/giggling lol. The guys included lol. 🤭

I'm not sure what awards this film will be up for, but seeing as how it's a film by Luca, we might actually see Z getting an Oscar nod for this!! Or, at the very least, maybe engaged in a FYC campaign. I can see it. Luca is very well-known...his film CMBYN garnered Oscar nods (including an Oscar nod for Timothee), and Z is Hollywood's Darling atm, soooo idk y'all! We might be looking at "Oscar-Nominated Actress" Zendaya next year! I guess we'll have to see lol. 😊

I looooved that Z was able to work with such a renowned and well-liked film director. I'm glad she got that experience. She's been working with some great directors lately (ie. Luca, Denis, etc), and I love that for her. It seems like FFC was also eyeing her for one of his roles at one time as well. So, I'm so proud of our girl!!! 👏🏾

OVERALL

Overall.... Definitely a fun, joyride of a film. 😊 VERY creatively done. So far, I haven't really been THAT impressed with Luca's films (CMBYN being the other one I've seen), but his films def make you THINK, long after they're over, that's for sure lol. The movie was fun and enjoyable to watch. There were just a few things that I felt could have been better imo.

OVERALL SCORE: 6.5/10

[curio-queries]

SMERALDO GARDEN MARCHING BAND

My thoughts prior to the release of MUSE. I've avoided pretty much all reactions and analysis posts until I finished this so I have no clue if anyone else has come up with better words to describe some of these concepts but here's my take on it. I wanted to get this out prior to MUSE so that I can see how my view evolves with further context but here's where I am now.

Initial Reaction:

I'd actually had a few issues that night so I wasn't in the best headspace to take in a new song but I did listen to it on Spotify first and then watched the mv twice, once without subs and once with. (And yes, I know it's technically not called an mv...deal with it lol)

Anyways, I definitely wasn't immediately sold on it - which is expected from me, it's EXCEEDINGLY rare that I like any song on first listen but SGMB only took a couple of runthroughs before I was on board. One thing that helped me reframe it in my mind and with my previous expectations is to remember the first part of Jimin's self-proclaimed attributes: Cutie, sexy, lovely. SGMB leans very solidly into the cutie aspect, a little near the lovely side but far deeper into Cutie than anything we've seen in his solo releases. (RememberCute was an answer in the seossword puzzle). That got me thinking about where the rest of his songs would be in comparison and here's the placement I've landed on. Some of these have changed over the past few days but I'm curious where y'all disagree with my placements.

Good old Serendipity, a perfect balance of the three in my opinion. All of FACE is firmly in the Sexy section with Like Crazy leaning more evenly into Lovely. Lie is also right there with LC but more closely on the border. My beloved Promise and Letter holding down the Lovely section with CTT straying closer to Cutie. If you forgot about the cutie circle though, SGMB would have seems like it was complete out of the expected range. I am curious if we'll ever get something that's a mix of cutie and sexy, I can't comprehend what that would be like but I wouldn't put it past our JM to find a way!

Theories?

So, how do I think I did with all of my theories? Let's go through them one by one:

Open Locker Meaning: nothing to prove/disprove this yet. There were an awful lot of references to Serendipity in the mv though, so maybe that's the tie-in? I don't know, this one was a streeeeeetch in any case.

Sound Effects Interlude: we know we're getting an interlude but we'll have to wait for MUSE and any behind info to learn if it's sound effects that Jimin recorded himself like Dive.

Rooms Going from Dark to Light: Yes! I mean we knew it was going to be a lighter album than FACE but I think the word BRIGHT is all over SGMB. And I think this technique in both of those videos was trying to highlight that for us.

SGMB as an Actual Band: Yes! Definitely right here too! I'm going to talk about this more below because I think this is actually a very important part of this song.

The Emoji Poll from the Insta Chat: Yes! I think some people are still trying to make the argument that each option is supposed to represent different songs on muse. And while the others may lean more into any of these specifically, SGMB definitely has elements of all of them as well

An Actual Band?

So, like I mentioned in the theory above, I had the thought that SGMB could be portrayed as a fictional band itself, very similar to what MCR did with the Black Parade. And since Jimin decided to use this as the song's title; as well as make it the pre-release track, I think this is an important topic to delve into.

First, this allows Jimin a perspective shift to share with us his career outside the lens of BTS. Not because he NEEDS or WANTS to separate himself from them but he has had his own journey as an artist that may differ from his experiences from the perspective of a BTS member. Obviously BTS is completely woven through this journey and he gives us an acknowledgement of that with the line about 12 June and the handsign.

(Sidenote, whenever I see any of them do that now, I instantly think of that moment in Jimin's pixid ep where he said they don't anymore...I think we may have been misled...) 😝

Second, the frame of SGMB from a band's perspective also puts the song firmly in the categorization of 'work' rather than 'personal'. With FACE being such a deeply personal projectregarding his very deep human experiences, i love that he'svery upfront with us about MUSE being a work project. I've said this before, and it's one of my absolute favorite things about Jimin's music: he crafts it so that we can easily adapt it to our own interpretations. There's a lot of loving and beautiful imagery in the lines of this song that can have special meaning in all levels of relationships; platonic or not. But his delivery if this message to us, is professional. This is reinforced by the suits Jimin has worn in all of the material released so far. He's following a work dress code. (If you happen to see this post within a week of release, we have a poll regarding Jimin's suits on @bts-polls )

ME + US = MUSE

I just want to touch on this briefly here as I expect there'll be more once the album releases but there are some hints already. Like I discussed in my FACE post, Jimin has again come up with some key words to weave through the project. In FACE, it was several sentences but MUSE seems to be focusing on the following:

ME: Jimin himself

US: Jimin's view on his audience

MUSE: His awareness of us and how that effects his creations and manner of artistry.

SGMB and CTT are both bursting with these references and viewpoints. But I honestly don't think of SGMB as a traditional 'fan song'. I have another post where I talk about the different kinds of fan songs. Like I said above, SGMB details Jimin's experience as an artist and how his audience plays into that process. Not like CTT that's literally a diary of our journey with him. Maybe an extremely nuanced take but SGMB just doesn't feel like it belongs in the same 'fan song' categorization that CTT does.

The End for Now

Does anyone know anything about that little hand-wave Jimin does during the bow at the end? He repeats it. Is just an additional flourish that he's added in himself? I've never seen anyone do that during bows after a performance so I'm wondering if it's a cultural/industry thing.

What do y'all think? I'd love to hear your thoughts! If any of you have made posts about SGMB, I'll try to read them now but rumblr is not very forgiving if you miss something in the timeline. I'm very happy for you to share links to your posts in the comments!

[scapeg8ats]

(Sorry for this being a long post, it became a rant/vent and a lot of thoughts. Someday I'll shut up about this I SWEAR lol. There's a TL;DR at the end.)

Maybe I'm not even interested in syscourse outside of learning more about plurality and its connections outside of CDDs and why someone may see themselves as plural or really any way of not seeing oneself as One Singular Self (whether it has to do with a disorder or it's a cultural/religious/etc. reason). Or I guess that does make me interested in syscourse. Just not echo chamber syscourse.

Like I'm sorry but y'all are fucking mean. I LOVE having discussions where I can learn and understand other perspectives. I guess to steal SAS's label, I'm very pro-syscourse conversation (though—and this isn't to bash SAS AT ALL—to me that feels redundant because syscourse is supposed to be conversation anyway. But it's not so the label is necessary). I want to learn. I want to be educated. I want to discuss this, even with people who disagree with me, because I want knowledge of other perspectives.

But it is so hard to find syscourse spaces that AREN'T echo chamber syscourse spaces. The desire to attain knowledge is stomped out by attaching inherent morality to labels that can be boiled down to one argument: Do you or do you not believe that plurality is exclusive to CDDs?

And shockingly this has more nuance than "endos are/n't valid". What may cause someone to see themselves as plural without a CDD? And the answers are vast and could be a FASCINATING discussion. Not even necessarily a debate, just learning more about people. And yet the answer to this question isn't even considered before so many people just go "[extremely loud incorrect buzzer noise]" and shut it down.

Maybe, ironically, this is me struggling to understand perspective. But I don't understand the lack of interest in wanting to understand, despite having experienced it myself. And even that, I want to understand. But I know that the fact that because of the nature of my opinions, I would be marked pro-endo, and shut out of that discussion. And it's INFURIATING because I respect the fact that they don't want to interact with me but I just don't understand!

There is endless room for discussion that's shut out and it's frustrating. It's heartbreaking. I want there to be discussion. But there won't be until the echo chambers start to open their fucking eyes.

I remember the moment for me was when someone in the Twitter dissociatwt community who I really respected, who always provided good resources, who was reliable and kind and honest...was pro-syscourse conversation. And my knee-jerk reaction was almost betrayal. How could someone that I respected be a pro-endo??

But I realized that they didn't stop being reliable because of this. Some of y'all will discount doctors who have been studying plurality, trauma, and dissociation longer than some of you have been alive because they're a stinky smelly "pro-endo". Therapists and doctors and the like who go "Why isn't it possible" get discounted because of this when they, too, just want to understand. Because with all due respect and in the most positive way, they're a bunch of nerds. And I don't understand. I don't understand how you can do that.

And that's really the thing. I don't understand and I'm not given the space to understand because my stance is somehow morally wrong. I'm not virtue signaling right. Sometimes for both sides. And it's awful.

TL;DR, I don't understand and am frustrated by echo chamber syscourse. That's it. That's all this long-ass post is saying. I don't get it. It didn't need a post but a lot of me just started Talking and did not stop.

[privatehousesanatomy]

hi this is a very controversial topic in the house md fandom i feel like and i'm going to speak on it. feel free to agree or disagree in the comments and reblogs, but truthfully i don't think anything you can say can or will change my view point.

that being said - house was never the "bad guy". is he a great guy? absolutely not. he's deeply flawed and i can understand why a lot of people hate him. it's hard to like somebody when all you're seeing is what's on the surface. he's cold, abrasive, mean, and an entire list of other words i could use to describe house but that's not the point of this post.

i can guarantee that there is not a single person on this planet that could go through even a quarter of the shit that house has gone through and still say that they're not miserable. you cannot expect someone to go through hell and not come out of it a changed person, and you cannot get upset with a person who's gone through hell and is bitter because of it.

let's start with his childhood. it's always been kinda up in the air just how abusive house's father was - the only real instances we were ever given detailing the abuse was ice baths, being made to sleep in the yard, and being given the silent treatment, which are all absolutely horrible things to do to child, however his childhood wasn't something that was ever touched on a whole lot. house even admits that there were good times, and a lot of people overlook that fact. a lot of y'all aren't willing to accept that people can have good memories of their abusers - that's how they become abusers in the first place. especially in terms of abusive relationships - there had to be good memories before the bad ones could be made. we don't know how john house was in terms of how he spoke about his son to other people. he could have described his son as his pride and joy to the general public but behind closed doors shamed house for not being more like him. having a tainted relationship with a parental figure is damaging and it's really no wonder why house grew up with such a skewed perspective on the concept of unconditional love.

chronic pain is a whole other issue. he was forced into a medical procedure against his will and regardless of whether or not it saved his life, it was still a direct violation of his bodily autonomy and to make it worse, the person that did it to him ending up abandoning him when he became too much of a burden. chronic pain is already hard enough to deal with. i deal with it myself and i completely understand why house gets the way he gets when he's in pain. to the rest of the world, they watch him function and think that the pain can't be that bad, and it's the same shit i experience in my own daily life. the pain is incredibly overstimulating at times and despite how good we might be at pretending that it's not, we're suffering inside.

another thing that doesn't help is how many people remind house on a daily basis how horrible he is and how they're worse off for knowing him. do you honestly expect him to start acting like everything is all sunshine and rainbows when people are practically telling him he's better off dead? that the world would be a better place if he wasn't in it? he is the way he is because everything in his life has proven to him that for some god forsaken reason, the universe is working against him and the only way for it to not hurt him is for him to become an isolated, antisocial individual. can't get hurt if you don't let anyone in, right?

while i'm here, i'm also going to touch on instances in the show that he gets blamed for. amber's death and chase getting stabbed were not his fault. everyone wants to sit here and blame him but there's no blame to put on him. with amber, he specifically called looking for wilson. he told amber to find wilson and send him. amber came anyway. it wasn't her fault either. it was no one's fault but the guy that drove into the bus. house risked his life to try and save amber's, and yeah she died but it wasn't his fault.

and with chase getting stabbed, that wasn't house's fault either. house might have taken the blame for it because if the blame has to be pinned on someone, might as well be him, right? but you can't blame him for either situation.

idk maybe im yapping too much and maybe none of this makes sense but it makes sense to me

[lefluoritesys]

My sibling in system (disorder holder & fictive) really wants me to do this post, but they barely have any words, so here we go:

We see a lot of systems struggle with big decision-making IRL because not everybody is on board, and we realized that trying to have everybody on board is probably the worst thing we have ever tried in the history of our systemhood. And I'm saying this as the alter who also dug too deep into our trauma and almost became Elsa in the depths Ahtohallan. Moreover, we're also polyfragmented. After a long and painful time of trying to figure our decision-making as a system, we have finally come up with some tips that might be useful for some other systems:

Ask your active fronters instead of all your alters. This might work best for polyfragmented systems but still works for smaller systems, too. Yes, active fronters and frequent fronters can change after a while, but it's still better to do what's best for you all npw and what you all want now than think about the possibilities of the future that haven't happened yet. Unless they are like life and death or extremely harmful to y'all, however, it's always necessary to take precautions.

Compromise is not supposed to please everybody 100%. Compromise is supposed to find a solution that 1) You all don't hate as much, 2) Will keep you safe. As long as others agree by at least 50%, the compromise is good. If you find other options, and they please everybody more, then by all means, go for it. But as long as it's safe, and all of you agree by at least a half (or, well, 50%), then that's a good compromise. Perfect solutions don't exist. Not always, at least. At the end of the day, you will still disagree with each other on little things, even if the plan feels and/or is perfect.

Your system structure, ideology, and hierarchy really do decide how you make decisions. There is literally no perfect advice for you out there, not even this post. Some systems have a host, and everything heavily depends on their decisions and how they are affected by what's going to happen. Some systems don't have a host but have a group of people at front who are in charge. Some systems are partial DID systems, some systems are class systems. It's always going to be different. Just because some tips work for some systems doesn't mean they should absolutely work for you.

Create polls if they work for you. Polls might work. Grab a system journal and tell everyone there's an active poll and get their answers (Simply Plural provides that option).

Writing a list of wants and desires. Your alters has a dream? Have them right it down (with consent) and consider it in your next big decision. Or just a decision. Maybe your alter wants chips, and you go out the next day, so you're like, "Oh yeah, lemme buy chips on the way home for them."

Writing a list of pros and cons. Cliché, I know. And gotta admit, never tried it ourselves just yet. But if we did, we'd probably write a general list of pros and cons, then letting our trauma holders and active fronters add some stuff that they want.

Speaking of your trauma holders, listen to your goddamn trauma holders. LISTEN TO THEM. If there's one type of alters who know more about your life and potentially you more than you do, it's your trauma holders. They know what they're talking about. They are not imagining it (this was said due to personal experience and not as an attack). It was, in fact, that bad, and even if you don't believe that, believe them when they say it. If a trauma holder says to get away from somebody or someone, hear them out. Do not dismiss them but have a conversation with them and understand that their opinion on the matter is important. It really helps to put things in perspective.

If you make the decision that will not affect you long-term, hold responsibility for that decision. Hold responsibility always, obviously, but I mean alter-wise. Alert others about it, or front long enough until that decision stops affecting you. Have a safety net in the form of your alters.

Always have a safety net IRL, too. Friends, maybe immediate family if possible, lover, partner system. Know where the nearest hospitals and fire departments are, write down all the emergency numbers. We ourselves created a list on our system notion page where we have names and emergency contacts of the people who we can turn to in case of a crisis, as well as local crisis lines. We also add notes about whether or not we can bring up the system around these people. Even if it's something small, better be prepared than dead (I am well aware a lot of you want to fight me on this, but you know what I mean, no dying. /t /nm)

Will this work for every system? No. But it works for ours. /ref

-host

[bluesidez]

First and foremost ugh I love your writing, eating it up every time purr. Also happy belated birthday bae. Now about this chapter, Miguel is pissing me off, and before yall jump ( some of yall be down bad and standards be on the floor lets acknowledge that) . Even if he was not aware that her behavior was bad or that she had feelings for him, the fact the his girlfriend felt some form of way, should’ve made he reevaluate his friendship with shawty. Because if y/n was tweaking and there was nothing going on, at least he can count it as a red flag for her. Anyways going to the person I really do got beef with, shawty self fish asf. Like okay yeah, you just realized that you were In love with him. But it’s selfish asf to try and sabotage someone who you claim you love happiness. Like if you truly love him, go outside, smoke a blunt, write in your journal and thug it out. Like the only semi reasonable scenario of someone doing this, is if their relationship/partner is toxic and even then start with a simple conversation 😭✋🏼 like ain’t that yo friend, communicate like it😭.

Thank you so much Anonnie! 🩵

You amongst many others are mad at Miguel. 😭 I don't think too many people will disagree with you. Half of y'all want Miguel to suffer more and half of y'all want him and reader to get back together.

To give some more perspective (even though I'm not sure if it will help Miguel's case at all), in the story Miguel and Xina were childhood besties like to the point where Xina was constantly around Miguel and his family. His family knows her very well and his mom LOVES her. As someone who had known her for so long and was only used to how she acted when it was just the two of them, he was a LOT slower to be like "oh Xina is actually being a dick towards my girlfriend."

He pushed it off thinking Xina was just wary or nervous, maybe even very territorial. He had a lot of trust when it came to her.

NOW. He also viewed their relationship with rose-tinted glasses because they were always there for each other, especially when both of their parents were being too much. You can see that a little bit with how Gabriel and The Geek Squad have to remind him of sly things that Xina has done to them or even him. Which is why it takes so long for it to click for Miguel.

And for Xina...I don't disagree that it was selfish of her. 😁 (I have a soft spot for her character though so I can't say too much lol.) If I speak more I'll spoil the story....

BUT OMG! I love when you guys leave comments like this. It really makes me happy! Like omg, for lil ol me? 🥺

[ultrone]

Can you describe the dynamics of jackienat?

I know it is not naty bully jackie and jackie start crying like people are characterizing it in their fic.

ofc 😁 i can write some bullet points on the way i see it

keep in mind that i haven’t had time to rewatch the show so maybe some details might be off lmaoo if there's anything i forgot to add u can lmk

i honestly don’t think they’d bully each other at all 😭 i see that more as a headcanon. i know that many people like to think that since nat is an “outcast” and jackie is the stereotypical popular blonde girl, they would pick on each other and stuff, but i disagree. although they do fit those stereotypes in terms of looks, that doesn't necessarily dictate their actions lmaoo.

on the show, you can see that most of the times that jackie was portrayed as a brat or an asshole was through shauna's perspective/narration or when she was calling everybody out for doing weird shit, like when the girls almost killed travis and then pretended that it didn't happen.

the one time i remember jackie being actually mean was when she lashed out and called nat a slut for sleeping with travis instead of getting food, which obviously was wrong because she was in fact mean, but haven’t we all lashed out at someone at some point? that doesn't mean u're a bad person 😭 this explains it more in-depth.

and in general, regardless of jackie's stubborn attitude when adjusting to the wilderness, you can see that she's a very nice person. for example, it's evident when she helped misty put on makeup and told her that she deserves to be loved, or when she gave her last piece of food to shauna cuz she was feeling sick. not only that, but most people also acknowledge that she's a nice person. for instance, when the girls were talking about excluding allie, someone said not to tell jackie about it, probably because she wouldn't be cool with doing that. the coach chose her as the team captain because she influences and motivates people. and when shauna noticed jackie's stubborn behavior after the crash and gave her the pep talk, she said, and i quote, that she “makes people feel like things are gonna be okay just by showing up, and her dumb hot awesome self" lmaoo 😭 that should be enough proof.

as for nat, i have nothing to say other than i think we can all agree with the fact that even though she puts up this strong and aloof facade, on the inside, she's very sweet and caring. despite being labeled as the "outcast" who engages in drugs, drinks, and possibly breaks the rules, it doesn't mean that she's a bully or anything of that sort. most of the times i recall her being mean or acting like an asshole were when she was defending herself because someone else had picked on her first. for instance, when tai would tease her about her addictions or when she threw the alcohol bottle at those guys who were teasing her and her friends, or during that fight with jackie, that jackie started. i know there might be other instances where she lashed out first, but i honestly don't remember right now 😭 nonetheless, i think y'all get what i'm trying to get at lmaoooo. i also don't think she'd bully anyone because she's just not that type of resentful outcasted bitch LMAOO. a proof of this is that she was always against the plan of excluding allie—and then confronted shauna about it at the bonfire when everyone started arguing 🥊🥊 my girl might be bold and blunt but she's mad chill and don't even argue with me about that 🙄

WITH THAT BEING SAID, taking all those things into account, i don't think either of them would bully the other for no reason, as they're not the type of people to go around bullying others for fun. just because nat is your stereotypical alternative rule breaker and jackie is your stereotypical hot popular girl, it's not a good enough reason to believe that they would bully each other.

NOW, let's talk about their relationship.

the initial interactions we witness between them, occurring both in the pilot and throughout the show, involve nat bringing some sense into jackie lmaoo. for instance, in the pilot, when jackie mentioned that allie's wound "might not be as bad as it looks," nat responded, "you could see her fucking bones, jackie." this highlights nat's unwillingness to indulge in jackie's optimistic—and perhaps slightly naive—outlook and shows her straightforward and blunt nature. so, right from the first episode, we start to see the contrast in their personalities.

then, the first direct interaction that we see between them is jackie telling her, "nat, i love that you don't care what anybody thinks, and you're so completely yourself." instead of viewing her as an outcast or teasing her due to her addictions like others do, jackie admires how she doesn't care about people's opinions, probably because jackie herself does care about what others think.

i don't recall seeing many (if any) deep conversations between jackie and nat that highlight their friendship more in-depth out in the wilderness. however, one thing i know for sure is that by the last episodes of the first season, jackie and nat are pretty much the only two team members not buying into lottie's beliefs. even if they did argue and have disagreements, what would have happened if nat had been present in the cabin during jackie and shauna's fight? in my opinion, nat would've definitely defended jackie. i know that there might've been some recent resentment toward jackie cuz she slept with travis the night before, but they share a similar perspective regarding not worshiping lottie, and we know about nat's blunt and outspoken nature, which contrasts with jackie's. nat would've seen jackie struggling without anyone defending her and would certainly voice her thoughts, especially when jackie confronted everyone about nearly killing travis, because nat would've agreed with her. not only that, but she could've even defended her from shauna. although it's technically none of her business, shauna was clearly coming at jackie out of jealousy, and even admitted that she slept with jeff and was pregnant with his baby. not a single person called shauna out on it, letting it slide due to their resentment toward jackie for calling them out on their weird-ass behaviour, but nat wasn't being blinded by that, because she didn't believe in that bs. i just know that nat wouldn't have let that slide. she would've shut shauna's and mari's ass in record time and left the cabin with jackie.

and nat was literally the only one who buried jackie's remains when no one else would, not even shauna, who was consumed by guilt for what happened to jackie.

if nat had intervened, jackie might probably still be alive, and we could've seen more of their friendship. perhaps they would've grown closer or formed an alliance of some sort, but i guess we'll never know 😔

[minniequinniee]

Yeah no. That's not how it works.

I'm not normally one to call out people on Tumblr, but I just so happened to come across Alex's page and saw this on her pinned.

For those who don't know, she recently announced that she was leaving anomaly observers because she was "heartbroken" about the fact that people were being mean to Trump supporters. She herself is also a Trump supporter who voted for trump in this election. And we do not support anyone who supports Trump.

Let me explain why we can't just all be "friends" even if we voted for the opposite candidate.

People voted for kamala harris because they wanted to keep their rights, have affordable housing. And have better lives.

People voted for Donald Trump because of money, for policies which is pretty much just project 2025. Which I can assure you is not at all a good thing.

Not to mention, Donald Trump is a rapist, a felon, and a pedophile.

Trump voters voted for money and power, Kamala voters voted for morality and peace.

Trump plans on doing a mass deportation on Latinos in our country. Can you name another famous politician what also did mass deportations on a group that he doesn't like? Preferably one from 1939?

You can't just say "oh I hope we can all still get along!" After voting for someone who wants to take away everyone's rights except for straight white rich men.

This is the kind of ignorance I cannot stand. You and so many other people who have this take have absolutely no idea how the real world works.

You just voted for a felon and a rapist who has been endorsed by the kkk. And you expect everyone to be like "oh that's okay! I forgive you for voting for an unqualified man who wants to take my rights away! We can still be friends!" That's not how it works.

Learn about division and the paradox of tolerance. (Yes I stole that last part from an image that was actually about the exact same topic we're currently on right now! Here's the image:)

The point being is, the world is divided. And it always will be if we continue voting and siding with the hateful side of history.

I hate to break it to you, but there is not such thing as world peace where we all just get along no matter what.

If someone endorses a clearly awful person, then I'm not just gonna stand there and forgive them for that unless they actually someone do further research and change their perspective.

"We can disagree and still be friends" is a famous line, but I think what you and other people fail to realize is that it doesn't just mean you can disagree on anything and still be friends. There's a line that needs to be drawn when it comes to human rights and education.

So with all that being said. You need to learn that the world isn't just all friendship and kindness. Yes. It would be great if it was like that, but unfortunately it's not.

There are so many people in this world I do not trust, especially the people who voted for Trump. Yes, this includes you.

I hope you can educate yourself on this matter and learn to accept the fact that people will be angry with you and so many others because of y'alls ignorant decision, and that no, we can't be friends if you voted for someone who is clearly not a good person in the slightest.

[eggtrolls]

my enemies are working against me; I was strongly tempted by dark forces to make a completely nuance-free statement like "dear christ I hate the wiki education foundation so fucking much it's such a terrible idea" but instead I will be SO strong and make a post with way too much nuance about a niche step in the sausage-making of wikipedia

backstory: when the world was young in like...2010, some wunderkind realized college students use wikipedia for their classes, ergo college students in classes can be harnessed en masse to be use FOR wikipedia! if you're taking a class on, say, the Punic Wars, wouldn't it be an excellent educational experience to teach others (via wikipedia) about the Punic Wars to develop your own research and academic (okay, academic in tone) writing abilities! the kids will contribute! wikipedia gets a new crop of editors who HAVE to do this unlike the rest of us morons editors who voluntarily toil under the endless wheel of the open internet! yeah!

and that's not like. the WORST idea I've ever heard, for all that it's not really a good one. Because on the surface, there are a lot of similarities to writing a humanities-esque college paper and a wikipedia article. you are assigned a topic; you research the existing scholarship; you compile a bibliography and summarize the relevant literature IN YOUR OWN WORDS; your sentences are cited, your perspectives are balanced, and you check your bias (as much as you can) at the door.

two major, one minor (but no less annoying), issues with this :

(major) wikipedia editing is not the same as college essay writing. for one thing, coordinated editing in groups on one topic like this is uhhhhh strongly discouraged on wikipedia because it's very fucking easy for a cliche of editors to make massive changes and sideline other editors who disagree with them. wiki editing is an iterative process where articles are refined and improved in the forges of a Socratic circle of topic-proficient grammar nerds.

(major) a lot of you are really bad writers!!! you are not good at writing at a college level on the first go and, as far as I can tell, none of you are using the blessed Sandbox feature that every single registered editor gets in order to test and try out the big, blocks of text edits y'all are adding to these shivering, unsuspecting articles who are getting t-boned by 19 year olds adding sentences that are just comma splices on comma splices.

(minor but lol it's the largest one because I'm petty) the rest of the editorial corps of wikipedia, to say nothing of the READERS, who are unaware of that this fuckery is ongoing, are not in your college class. I'm not taking Fall 2024 ENG 2201 at [Random Ass] University and the articles that I keep an eye on didn't sign up to be shoddily edited by a bunch of novices who have no understanding of, let alone respect for, (among other things) the Wikipedia Manual of Style, editing norms and best practices, how to not plagiarize whole-cloth, and how not to regurgitate propaganda. the rest of the internet is not standing still while you make unsourced claims about dead Emirati sheikhs being "visionary leaders" with references from Emirati governmnet websites. no!!!! there's never enough oversight from the professors and Wiki Ed Foundation people and then when I undo most of the shit-tier edits they're like ummm hi sweaty sorry but I'm reverting you (triple-revert-undo-block guideline violation but go off I guess) so I can see my students' edits for their grade (despite the fact that the history features keeps a record of every single edit) sooooo yeah just leave this horseshit on Hedy Lamarr's internet for 8 weeks until the semester is over :) and I'm like no. die perhaps.

'so why does wikipedia keep doing this if the student editors suck so much donkey dick' - again, a few main reasons.

I'm bitter rn because I've been dealing with a particularly stupid batch of student editors editing particularly badly. most of them are much better and have supervision so they can't suck THAT badly. it's generally an overall benefit to have anyone edit....ever. so this is still a positive, either from the edit itself or that it prompts other editors to go take a look at what these kids are doing and clean up both the new mess and the preexisting mess that has been stagnant since 2012.

WIKIPEDIA NEEDS NEW EDITORS SO BADLY. you know how the premise of Game of Thrones is that there's all this seemingly really important but in fact petty fighting happening between the houses or w/e but the actually, huge issue is the ice zombies about to fuck shit up? people are freaking out about ChatGPT and other LLMs but the reality is that won't matter very much if there's no one to do the actual editing. Wikipedia is STARVING for editors as people move on, get older, get new responsibilities, get fed up with bullshit, sometimes die, etc. multiple college classes of dozens of students (worldwide! so doubly great if it helps with countering the American/Western-centric bias!) who are under 25 is like a blood infusion for a hemophiliac to Wikipedia. I cannot emphasize enough for much they (we) want YOU to go edit. I will help you, I will take your hand. they want you, personally. and imho that's why there's the willingness to put up with these pretty solidly mediocre editors - the odds that one or two per every 50 will stay and turn into a relatively active editor.

[crayolacolor]

simon infinitytrain?

send me a character and i'll list the below things about them | accepting!

HELLO ANON. i do not know if you'll ever see this because it took me ten years, but here i am, answering you.

FAVORITE THING ABOUT THEM:

fun fact: simon infinity train is the reason i have a disclaimer about me getting attached to tragic antagonists in my pinned post. so you can probably make an educated guess what i like about him.

he's just. such a well written character. i love how his negative character development was contrasted against grace's positive character development. i love how the writers did a really good job of making him infuriating and sympathetic at the same time.

i'll go more into my thoughts on him in a later section, but yeah, the tl:dr is he really just is my character type hahaha.

he's just a really complex character and imo the writers nailed that.

LEAST FAVORITE THING ABOUT THEM:

okay well, this answer changes depending on if you mean from a writing perspective or a 'him as a person' perspective. from a writing perspective, 100/10, no notes. i can't think of anything i disliked.

from a PERSON perspective. episode 6 makes me want to murder this man <3 i want to put tape over his mouth every time he speaks in that episode. it's somehow WAY worse than when he's just straightup being an over-dramatic anime villain at the end of the season.

FAVORITE LINE:

oh there are many. i need to rewatch again. but the ones that live in my brain rent free are ALL after his downward spiral begins:

"teamwork begins with two people trusting eachother. but you? you're no person." dramatic effect. extremely traumatizing for everybody who's ever watched this show. 10/10

"i liked what we had, but you made me do it! you betrayed the apex. and you betrayed me." again, dramatic effect. really gives you a feel for what's going on in his head, i think. 10/10

"why would i ever want to change if i'm always right!?" iconic. i think this is the one people remember the most from him, along with the one from ep 5.

BROTP & OTP (combining because my answer is the same for both):

grace. lol. full stop. hopefully i don't have to explain that i am VERY AWARE that their relationship was unhealthy in many, MANY ways. that is what i like about it. i'm a huge fan of messy relationships in fiction. i am a self proclaimed angst fiend.

the tragedy of it all is 100% the appeal of it for me, from either a platonic OR romantic standpoint. i love that. and yes, i do ship them to an extent- but NOT in the "i think they should have gotten together in canon" way. again, the angst is the appeal!!

i admit i do also enjoy aus where they fix their relationship, but not INSTEAD of the canon, more so in ADDITION to the canon. i think it's a fun alternate route to explore, but i deeply adore what the infinity train writers did with them in the show and that will not be changing.

NOTP:

literally any of the protags from the previous seasons. y'all, simon and grace are 18. you can't be shipping them with the 13-14 year olds. please stop. (nobody here! i mostly see this on ao3, honestly.)

RANDOM HEADCANON:

i think simon has been back to the cat multiple times in secret.

i really like the theory that he got some of the apex's tech from her. the main thing i have to support this is this line from the episode where he returns to her cabin in book 3:

"i knew you'd have something. you always do."

particularly i think there's a good chance he got the unmodified gravity boots from her (and likely modified them himself) and possibly also the number tracker.

UNPOPULAR OPINION:

oh i'm sure a lot of what i've already said has been an unpopular opinion, haha. i'm one of those people that's so in the middle in a debate that both sides of it have reasons to disagree with me.

i really like simon. he and grace are my favorite characters in the show. there are parts where i feel really bad for him, and parts where i want to yell at him and hit him over the head with a very large stick.

i see his death as a tragedy in universe, but also a really good writing choice on the part of the infinity train crew.

i don't think they secretly had a scheme to make us dislike him. i think it was written in such a way that it makes sense that some people would have a viscerally negative reaction to him, and others wouldn't. he's a very complex character and that's good writing!!!

i think the tragedy was the point, which is something both people who like him and people who hate him seem to completely overlook in a lot of cases. it's either "woohoo! simon died!" or "killing simon was bad writing he should have been redeemed >:/" not "oh this is really sad but i love it from a story perspective."

i don't think he was "irredeemable", per-say. the fact is, he was faced with a pivotal choice in episode five, and he picked the wrong one. he chose to double-down. i love that. i really do. i love the downward spiral. it's painful in the best way. i would not change the canon show for the world. again, 100/10, no notes.

but i can also see a universe where he made the right choice. i was writing a fic about that, once. (which admittedly has some characterization issues which i would fix if i tried it again.) i think it was possible. and i think that's a fun route to explore too. not a better route from a writing standpoint, but a good one.

i have so many more thoughts but this has already gotten really long, and i have two more questions to go, lol. but if you want to hear anymore you're free to send me another ask about it!

but, for now, moving on.

SONG I ASSOCIATE WITH THEM:

someone else on tumblr pointed out that "the moon will sing" by the crane wives is a good fit for simon @ grace and now i can't unhear it.

and, finally, FAVORITE PICTURE OF THEM:

anime villain simon my beloved.

[stop-breaking-my-heart-telltale]

Hey CJ, you mentioned that you disagree with a lot of your old TWDG opinions, any that stand out you wanna share? Also i agree with what you said about wanting to play the series for the first time again with no prior knowledge - i would love to meet louis character for the first time again.

Yeah, some opinions have changed with time and moving on from being a hardcore, active fan in the fandom. I'm pretty sure I've talked about some of them more recently, like how I used to not like Jane but now I've become something of a "Jane apologist," if you will.

I was also super vocal about hating the Clementine comics when the 12-page comic dropped, and I'm pretty sure I was shitty about Tillie Walden... which I look back on now and feel embarrassed. In fact, I specifically remember calling attention to the fact that Skybound turned off comments on the first book trailer and on their instagram, twitter, etc. and being like, "look at these COWARDS! they know we hate the comic and that Tillie's a bad artist, they're trying to shut us up!" ........but then I heard they turned them off because Tillie was getting threats, and it caused me to dig around and see the vile shit fans were saying.... It gave me pause to think things through and I feel very differently about it all now.

I've also changed my mind on Minerva. Like Jane, there was a loooong period of time where I didn't like her, but now? I think she's great. A real tragedy.

In fact, real talk, I think my perspective on most of the female characters in TWDG has shifted dramatically. I've done a lot of thinking on this just in general; I'm much harder on female characters than male characters. I can pretend like noooooo I was always soooo fair... but no, not always. I'm sure it's from some deep-rooted, internalized misogyny I have that I'm working on, but I also think the games sometimes neglect those characters, too. Which makes it easier to brush them off as just "poorly-written" and "bad characters" if I don't like them when that's not always the case.

Or let's be real, we all know how this goes; the games give us a flawed male character and fans are like "he's my blorbo, here's a 50k essay about why he deserved better and a list of my headcanons and the twenty AUs I've written for them-" but then a female character's just as flawed and fans are like "lol she's poorly written, here's an essay on why-"

Don't look at me like that. I know I'm guilty of this. I know y'all remember Mitch. Back in the day, Mitch was my boy and I used to write about him all the time but like... god forbid I put that much effort into writing about Violet or Minerva, right?

Or even look at Kate, for example. Past CJ would've talked about how much she doesn't like Kate and she hates the forced romance with Javi, she's just there as a way to make David and Javi fight, etc. But you ask me about Kate now and I'm like, "Girl, ANF did you so dirty, you didn't deserve this."

Or how about Bonnie in S2? We all love to hate on Bonnie, but like... she's such an interesting character?? She's a recovering drug addict so desperate for a place, and you can see Carver's manipulation at play in the way she talks about him to Clementine. It takes seeing him physically beat Kenny within an inch of his life before she's like "Yeah no, fuck this, we're leaving tonight." And we give her shit about Luke's death and being mean to Clementine but frankly? Yeah, she's mean to Clementine and that's fine.

What, it's okay for Kenny to lash out and call her a stupid kid when Sarita dies because he's your poor meow meow and it makes his character soooo morally gray and complex? But Bonnie lashes out about Luke's death and suddenly she's just a massive piece of shit? No complexities or anything? There's no grey morality? No underlying motive or emotions behind the choice to abandon the group with Mike and Arvo?? She's just a bitch??

And do I even need to talk about Sarah? Hmm? We all know how Sarah was received and how fans still talk about her. Again, Sarah has a complete meltdown over losing her father and people get hurt, and fans wish death upon her... but Kenny has a meltdown and brutally beats up Arvo or threatens to smack Clementine or a number of things.... "that's fine, he's just really upset, he lost his family, y'know? everyone keeps trying to GASLIGHT me that he's bad but if you really think about it, Arvo totally deserved to be abused and it's actually Clementine's fault Kenny hit her because she tried to stop him-"

I just... the lengths we go to justify and defend this violent, toxic character but then act like Jane is the worst, I can't-

It's so funny to me whenever I see someone in the fandom complain about wanting more morally grey, flawed female characters because like... y'all couldn't even handle Jane. Or Lilly. Or Sarah. Or Bonnie. Rebecca. Eleanor. Christa. Minerva and Violet, in a lot of cases. So like... what do you actually want?

Note that I'm guilty of this, too, and I've asked myself that question... haven't fully worked out the answer yet.

That's the major thing that comes to mind about opinions I had that I've changed my mind about. I think a big factor in that is letting twdg go and getting invested in other fandoms, doing a lot more reading, getting back into writing, etc. Obviously I've really gotten into the Dragon Age fandom and that's what triggered this "journey of self-reflection~" when it comes to how I perceive female characters. Like, you want flawed, morally-grey ladies? That's your series... assuming you can actually handle it.

But I also recently finished a playthrough of Fallout New Vegas and remembered my love for Veronica Santangelo, like... I don't care that the game doesn't technically have romance, that's my girlfriend, I love her. Then the other night I finished my first playthrough of Life is Strange True Colors [I know, where the fuck have I been, right?] and I spent 40% of the time looking at flowers, 10% being sad about Gabe, and the other 50% trying to figure out who I liked more, Steph or Ryan.

I've also been reading a lot of wlw novels which is just..... THAT'S a whole mess I won't get into because this is already long enough and you didn't ask. Just know that's also another factor in this reflection.

And to answer the other part of your ask: I miss Louis. I would love to play TFS again for the first time again, that was a fun time.

[the5thcellar]

Hard disagree! Kate and Leo were close friends and he even walked her down the aisle for her wedding, but that friendship was never crossed when it came to PR even for titanic promo. They showed up to an award show together during the hype, and the interviewer asked them if they came together Leo said yes, then the interviewer asked if they had a announcement to make as a couple and Leo said absolutely not, we are great buddies. That’s a real friendship.

Luke and Nicola pushing boundaries of a flirtatious relationship, making it seem like there’s more there is exactly what everyone has been saying, over the top.

y'all are really so silly I can't.

why in the world would you compare a press run done in the bloody 90s to a press run done in today's media landscape....

it's not even CLOSE to the same.

but sure ... you're free to use Kate and Leo as an example if you want.

I can easily use Chris and Mariska as an example to prove my own point. Over the top PR with them making out in front of interviewers... always making it seem like there's more.... and all of it being absolutely TRUE because in their personal lives they obviously have something non-platonic going on.

see how easy it is to show that PR can mean nothing or everything lmao.

I don't understand this insistence that the PR is over the top. the PR is over the top to YOU because YOU don't think there's anything more to Luke and Nicola beyond friends.

The PR is perfectly acceptable to ME because I firmly believe there is something MORE to them than friendship.

our beliefs do not fucking coincide. we do not have the same perspective. what is the point of sending me this ask when I've reiterated my stance a million times ???

if you don't believe there's more THAT. IS. YOUR. VIEW. please stop making it mine and everyone else's.

[enbyjane]

why i see cho being aro as pretty much canon

Before I show some of the strongest scenes which read to me as Cho being aromantic (i.e. not experiencing romantic attraction), I want to say that there are many small scenes even from the beginning. In season 1, when he talks to the waitress, and she talks about doing crazy things for love, he seriously recommends her therapy, which she takes as a joke (and he goes along with it). I think he's genuinely confused as to why anybody would do crazy things for people they're romantically attracted to, I don't think he can relate to the concept.

He doesn't relate to people wanting to be in a relationship.

The following scenes further prove my point:

(under read more so i don't get a kilometric post on your dashes)

evidence no. 1 - S5E22

evidence no. 2 - S6E3

These scenes show to me that for him, the only reason you would be with someone is for the sex, and the only reason Wayne would want to marry Grace is because he knocked her up. I haven't included it here, but he presumes from the start that Rigsby doesn't want to get married, when he's mostly confused about his own feelings.

But I think the final example might show it the best:

evidence no. 3 - S6E5

I left the last screenshots of the scenes bigger so that we all could appreciate Cho's facial expressions. The man is in literal pain just hearing about his best friend's relationship. (the best face of I literally could not care less, please stop talking about it). And this is not a general sentiment per se. In the previous episode (S6E4), Rigsby is concerned about his sexual life because he and Grace didn't get to have sex since the marriage. While Cho may not be 100% comfortable, he is still more comfortable with that conversation than this one. He's engaging and he offers whatever information he knows ("What about your wedding night? I bought you a carriage?" and "I read on the internet that women lose their interest in sex after marriage"). Whereas in this conversation he doesn't engage at all, he doesn't care at all, he wants OUT of it. He's glad for Rigsby but he doesn't want to hear details about his relationship.

Therefore, while I don't think they consciously made Cho and aro that fucks, from my point of view, they made Cho and aro that fucks and doesn't care about relationships one iota.

Then what about Summer?

Summer is one of his most serious relationships from the show, apart from the relationships he has with his own teammates. Unfortunately, we don't have enough insight into his brain (or a lot of things from his perspective) in order to say how that relationship was with 100% accuracy.

But the way I see it, he genuinely cared for her a lot, and was sexually attracted to her, but he wasn't romantically attracted to her and I don't think he would've cared for that. I think their relationship could've worked if they'd been friends with benefits (and that would've been interesting to see!), but not if Summer would've wanted to marry him or something.

Even in the scene when they meet up later and she's getting ready to marry, I read him as being mostly nostalgic and still fond of her, not really jealous or wanting to have been the one marrying her. His final smile even seems to translate into something like "I don't get it, but you seem happy, so I'm happy for you."

In conclusion: Cho is an aro king babey!!!

Final Important Note: You can disagree with me, of course, to say that you don't think I'm right about Cho, but any arophobia, any bs that it doesn't exist or whatever someone might think to say that demeans aromantic people will be blocked without discussion. Aro people, y'all are valid and I love you (platonically). Happy Pride!!!

[batsarebetterthanpeople]

Another thing about the whole not being able to handle historical fiction existing is that people are totally unwilling to engage critically with media which is so weird because. Like... Ok.

Presumably you don't agree with every take every friend you have has. If you did you would simply not have friends. I've ended friendships over politics before and I don't regret that but the line can't be "agree with all of my takes" or else you'll never have friends. One of my best friends in the whole world is a black cisgender veteran in his late 40s, I'm a white transgender communist in my early 20s. We certainly do not agree on everything how could we with such vastly different life experiences. He doesn't cross my lines and I don't cross any of his so we're at peace with our political disagreements. And I listen to him when he has something to say. We take each other's perspectives into account and sometimes we disregard a point we disagree with but it doesn't mean we stop listening. That's how you have friends. This doesn't just apply to friends either I've taken the perspectives of people I hate into account before.

So too media, like movies and things of that nature are made by people who have things to say. that's why they've made a movie. You should be able to listen to what they have to say and think about it without accepting it uncritically. Media can cross a line and you can write it off completely, but the way some of y'all act it's like every thing that isn't perfectly morally pure is something you can't like or engage with in any way and it's just... Be serious jfc. How do you have friends if you can't listen to what someone has to say when they disagree with you on one thing. This is at it's base level a fundamental inability to handle disagreement appropriately.

[discluded]

On MA and fanservice. Seems like discussion in anglophone spaces misses cultural expectations - many things MA do and say are expected of them as being a cp (even for het cp). Many actors in the thai BL world are very obviously queer - they dont hide, they just dont come out. Unpopular opinion, I honestly do think these couples (when both are queer) are getting together at the same rates as the het cps. Its human nature to like a person who is compatible with you and shares your interests.

[context]

FOR THE RECORD, I think most of his research happened in 2021 or early 2022 so like, MileApo would not be a blip on his radar during the time he would be talking to industry insiders. 🤷🏻‍♀️ Also hilariously just, take his big-headed declarations with a grain of salt. Appreciate it for what it is, but he got into a feud with one of my RL friends about Johnny's fandom a couple of months ago so 🤣 he's very self-important about how he has ~insider access too

Friend, I don't feel comfortable legislating morality. When it's a matter of fandom history / context with multiple perspectives discussed, sure, but in many instances, I don't know you might extrapolate approval or disapproval.

Also, this is not chastisement so don't take it as such, but I want to encourage everyone to be more confident in their own opinions.

If you don't feel it's wrong, like the tone of your message implies, then you don't need my or anyone's approval. And if not seeking validation of your opinions is hard for you sometimes, then practice!

I feel strongly about mentioning this since your message came in the context of me mentioning HP fandom history and toxic fandom participants, and I have no qualms highlighting who some of these people are and what they did when they took advantage of others with their more assertive personalities.

One such individual is thanfict!on (lol don't want them to find me) but this person not only caused drama in HP and other fandoms but also led a cult that eventually led to the deaths of some cult members. (See the fanlore article I linked about them.)

In regards to practicing cult/groupthink protective behaviors, it also help buffer against political propaganda.

But to answer your question: 1) it's not criminal in any way nor is it hurting anyone to believe such a thing and 2) as long as you are aware that an opinion about the people's relationships [general] is irrelevant to how those relationships actually are and don't get angry when there's evidence pointing to otherwise, then it's fine. A . absolutely asinine example of this was I once saw a person said their "opinion" was that Mile was closer to Build than to Apo... *makes Oprah "see" gesture*. Or the toxic solos who keep insisting that Mile and Apo barely tolerate each other, though their narrative is always a mess.

In many cases, we don't know the specifics of people's relationships with each other, and as long as you understand your own opinion has no effect on that actual relationship, there's no problem if you think one way or another. 🤷🏻‍♀️

For the record, I think my opinion is perfectly clear :) I trust y'all ability in reading comprehension. I just don't believe in telling people how to think or guiding them to a conclusion. I have faith in your abilities to do what's right for yourself.

The lovely thing about having differing opinions but civil conversation is that we can still respect each other and disagree! No harm, no foul. Some things set me off more than others, and we all come from contexts in which certain things are more sensitive than others.

[messengerhermes]

TLDR: Happy pride, please stop shoving trans women and trans femmes through the Whore/Madonna complex.

Hey I know I say this a lot, but it's Pride Month, so--- Please try to find queer community offline.

Specifically, try to find queer community that does not all look, act, and think exactly like you. It wigs me the fuck out to see how often on Tumblr in particular I see what is essentially gender essentialism dressed up in trans language--- ie this generalization of "trans masc" vs "trans femme" experiences. I came into myself in meatspace trans spaces. I was really really lucky for this. Trans women were the first other trans people I met. Trans women were everywhere in my community. Running the annual trans banquet. Riding up on chopper bikes to the monthly trans barbecues. Helping other immigrant trans people get situated in our city. Running clothing swaps, and fighting for BIPOC spaces, and showing up to drag shows. Trans women have never been an "other" to me, or somehow separate in their experience of transness from me. They've always been friends, mentors, allies, respected leaders. And the continuous thing I see online is this sense that trans mascs are from mars and trans femmes are from venus. And I gotta ask, what the fuck is going on, y'all? I've never had a trans woman willfully disrespect my gender. I've disagreed with trans women. I've been annoyed by trans women. But that had nothing to do with their gender, and attributing the very normal human experience of "sometimes you won't like someone, just because they're a bit irritating" to their gender identity is indeed, transmisogynist. I do not agree with every nonbinary person I meet. I sure as shit don't agree with every trans masc I meet. But deciding that those disagreements stem from our perspectives on gender, or our gendered experiences, as opposed to us having different personalities and different lives experiences, means buying into gender essentialism.

Please embrace the idea that you can disagree with other trans people and still be in community with them. Please examine your urge to dismiss trans women as somehow inherently bad????? because of their gender experience. Please consider how trans women are in a vulnerable position that might make them more wary, hesitant, and nervous about connecting with other trans people. Please consider how nonbinary people who get read as "more masculine" or assumed to be AMAB might be harmed by queer spaces hostility towards masculinity. Consider how that hostility has become so deeply rooted, that trans women can be extremely femme as still face that antagonism. We don't need to be doing the work of our oppressors by dividing ourselves y'all.

Someone telling you the truth that you don't experience the same kind of oppression they do is not the same thing as saying you do not experience oppression or hardships. A trans femme or trans woman acknowledging they or she experiences trans misogyny, a distinct form of transphobia, is not saying trans masc and trans men do not experience transphobia. It's acknowledging that she gets a very particular form of violence shot her way, and its roots are different than the roots of the aggression someone taken to be trans masc receives.

Acknowledging difference is not establishing hierarchy. Acknowledging difference creates the opportunity to start addressing the unique ways a problem shows up and must be addressed. Also, you will never find the perfect trans woman who has never done or said something awkward, mean, rude, or harmful. Because trans women are people. Even trans women who are absolute assholes still deserve safety from trans misogyny. Because protection from bigotry should never hinge on whether you have been judged a "good person" by some arbitrary social council. Please stop reinventing Calvinism.