#aromanticism

[ryomaandgundhamkin]

oh fr. I had to do one with a motorcycle TWICe bro, it sucked

"love is what makes us human" actually it's 'select all images with boat' but go off I guess

[angieblogging]

a beginners guide to… aromanticism.

so topic covered in this post will include:

what does it mean to be aromantic?

qpr vs romantic relationship

what is the aromantic-spectrum?

aro ≠ ace

a/n + other recourses

1. what does it mean to be aromantic?

an individual that is aromantic experiences no romantic attraction. that means they feel no romantic attraction, but can feel other types of attraction such as — platonic, familial, sexual, queerplatonic, alterous, aesthetic, emotional, sensual, intellectual. (these are the types of attraction i know, for the full list and descriptions check out this wiki page!)

each aromantic person can have a certain stance on romance such as romance repulsed or favourable. if you want to learn more about this topic check out this wiki page.

some aromantic people may be in a committed romantic and/or sexual relationship or a so called qpr aka a queerplatonic relationship.

2. qpr vs romantic relationship.

so to start this off i will say that the only people defining their relationship can be the ones in said relationship.

a romantic relationship is usually considered a relationship where two individuals are romantically attracted to each other and engage with each other romantically, such as kissing, cuddling, being committed exclusively to one another.

however the actions mentioned are not exclusive to romantic relationships.

a queerplatonic relationship is a relationship out of the binary. not a romantic or a platonic one. a qpr is not a stepping stone in between a platonic relationship and a romantic one. it is not necessary in between the two, it’s simply existent on it’s own.

what exactly is a qpr is hard to define as it means different things to different people and the only ones that can define it are the people in their qpr. some people are in a qpr where they engage in romantic and/or sexual activities, but feel no romantic attraction to each other, a qpr can be a fully platonic relationship with a sexual aspect or it can be just platonic, but their relationship exceeds the “norm” such as living together temporarily or permanently, raising a child together aka co-parenting. those are just a few examples.

3. what is the aromantic-spectrum?

it’s basically a spectrum of all the aromantic identities. someone who is on the aro-spec can feel little to no romantic attraction, some people feel it under certain circumstances or their attraction fades under certain circumstances. some, but not all labels on the aro spec include: demiromantic, aegoromantic, greyromantic, apothiromantic.

if you wish to read about more labels under the aro-spec check out this page.

all the labels on the aromantic spectrum have their sexual counterparts (ex. demiromantic — demisexual).

4. aro ≠ ace

so while aro and ace (short for asexual) communities are basically one big community (a-spec), it is important to note that aromantic individuals do not have to be asexual, some aros are asexual, some are just aro, some are aplatonic, so keep that in mind. one doesn’t equal the other. just cause someone is aro doesn’t make the asexual, however they can still be on the ace-spec. one can be aromantic and demisexual, many aro/aces use the split attraction model otherwise known as SAM.

SAM is there to basically help out to distinguish between romantic and/or sexual relationship, one is not tied to the other. some may be biromantic and asexual or homosexual and aromantic.

some aros choose not to use the SAM model and in this case they identify as a non-SAM aromantic. why they choose to use it can have many reasons, however they should also be respected as they can identify themselves however they want and truly own no one an explanation.

6. a/n + other recourses

i think this post catches the basics of aromanticism to the best of my ability. this is the basics and being aromantic is so much more complex than a couple definitions.

here’s a website you may find helpful! website

however i encourage you to do further research than just my post and that website. tumblr is a great place as well, there are plenty of aromantic blogs out there, like @our-arospec-experience @arospec-culture-is !

[fzjp]

Lowkey want to do a comic about my experience being aroace (and realizing aesthetic attraction and realizing im aego aroace) but maaaaannnnn i don't know where to start

Actually I do, not as a comic... not anymore

I'm one of those aces who thought they were bi/pan before realizing zero attraction is still zero, also one of those aces who have the horniest, most degenerate thoughts and laugh it off and move on with my life

I realized I was aro when I was in a romantic relationship and thought "Why do I suddenly feel nauseous??? How to delete??? Now????" And that was my first and last romantic relationship. 0/10. Would Not Recommend. (Unless you want to then go wild. Who am i to tell you what you can or can't do??)

I first learned about aesthetic attraction while learning more about asexuality and its spectrum and lemme tell you one thing

IF I LEARNED ABOUT AESTHETIC ATTRACTION MY LIFE WOULD BE SOOO MUCH EASIER

YOU MEAN TO TELL ME PEOPLE SEE OTHER PEOPLE PRETTY AND MOVE ON???? CUZ IT ME!!! ME TOO FRIEND!!!!!

Now I've heard aegosexual as a microlabel before and moved on but now looking back at it... yeah... yeah it me

While there are many definitions for aegosexual, this definition

"Liking the idea of sex, and/or enjoying sexual content, but not actually experiencing attraction or wanting to have sex with anybody"

FITS ME SO MUCH!!!! IT ME!! IT ME FOR REAL!!!!

[killingmyselfbutnotdying]

"Friends dont look at friends that way" COWARD. I look at my friends with awe in my eyes, my chest is filled with love, im glowing because i get to be near my friends. I look at my friends and i would give them my everything. SO SKILL ISSUE, look at your friends with all the love that you have

[jester-i-hardly-know-her]

The conspiracy is that the enforcement of monogamous romantic relationship structures is a vehicle for maintaining white supremacy and capitalism, and also it's not a conspiracy, I'm just correct

Oh, this red string you see wrapped around my finger? You're asking if it connects me to my one true love? An understandable mistake, but I'm aromantic. This is for my conspiracy board.

[42-clocks]

[image ID: Bernie Sanders meme with a small aromantic flag captioned “I am once again asking for you to include aromantics in your pride art/posts/merch” End ID]

[rottingwithers]

No, you misunderstood. When I said I can’t feel romantic or sexual attraction I wasn’t complaining, I was bragging.

[hemlockpill]

use the symbols you like but I'd just like to warn people that some of these symbols have double meanings you may not want to communicate, at least without being warned people may approach you weird.

the black spade: this is a raceplay thing. this communicates that you want to be "blacked" or dominated by a black man specifically. this is generally taken as a racist symbol

the pineapple: this is a swinger thing. this communicates that you want to participate in trading partners &/ group sex. people who see this may approach you sexually without warning.

➵ Aromantic Symbols

I think aromantic symbols are cool and deserve to be talked about more, so here’s a list of some of the interesting symbols used in the community! If you have any suggestions for the post, please let me know!

Arrows & archery

Origin/meaning: Arrow is a pun on aro, the shortened form of aromantic.

White ring on the middle finger of the left hand

Origin/meaning: A common asexual symbol is wearing a black ring on the middle finger of the right hand. The aro version was inspired by this, but the color and hand are reversed.

Gryphons (or griffins/griffons, however you want to spell it)

Origin/meaning: Aces have dragons as a symbol, because aces are often regarded as “invisible” and thus comparable to mythical creatures. Gryphons have been proposed as a mythical creature equivalent for aros.

Yellow flowers

Origin/meaning: In the world of flower color meanings, yellow flowers can be used to symbolize friendship and positivity.

Pizza & ice cream

Origin/meaning: Inspired by cake being an inside joke and/or symbol for ace folks (“cake is better than sex”), aros adopted pizza and ice cream as their own food symbols.

Spades (specifically for asexual aromantics)

Origin/meaning: In the asexual community, the ace of hearts is used to represent alloromantic asexuals, while the ace of spades is used to represent aromantic asexuals. Both involve a pun on ace, the shorted form of asexual.

Pineapples (specifically for allosexual aromantics; newer symbol)

Origin/meaning: Pineapples are emerging as a symbol in the alloaro community due to sharing colors with the alloaro flag.

Frogs (newer symbol)

Origin/meaning: I’m assuming this is because frogs are typically green, a color shared by the aro flag. Plus they’re just neat. :)

Manticores (newer symbol)

Origin/meaning: From the pun “aromanticore.”

Aardvarks (older / less common symbol?)

Origin/meaning: It seems to have originated from this meme format.

And as an honorable mention…

Anything green

Succulents? Green heart emojis? They belong to the aros now

➵ Flags

Because flags also act as symbols, here’s a section dedicated specifically to some of the more common arospec flags and their meanings! (Note: This isn’t meant to be a comprehensive list of all arospec labels.) Under a read-more link because this post is already a bit long.

Keep reading

[knifearo]

here's the thing. "ace people can still have sex" and "aro people can still be in relationships" are objectively true statements. this is because people can do whatever the fuck they want forever regardless of their label/orientation. however some of you have GOT to get your shit together and stop using those statements to undermine larger conversations about aspec identity. following up "ace people don't owe you sex in a relationship" with "ace people can still have sex in a relationship though!" is not fucking helpful! yes it's true. yes it's a reality for many people. however if we used our fucking brains for a second and thought about how following up "people don't have to conform to societal expectation" with "but people can still conform!! don't worry they can still conform!!!!" is counterproductive and very frustrating for a lot of people then we could get back to the actual point which is not "aspec people can still have sex/be in relationships" but "aspec people can do whatever they want with their relationships and their bodies". which they can, by the way. they can do whatever they want forever. and you should give them 200 dollars every time you see them for dealing with this shit

[pinnakoladda]

hey as a local aroace, i want to specify something.

were no strangers to love. you know the rules and so do i (do i). a full commitments what im thinking of. you wouldnt get this from any other guy. i just wanna tell you how im feeling. gotta make you understand. never gonna give you up. never gonna let you down. never gonna run around and desert you. never gonna make you cry. never gonna say goodbye. never gonna tell a lie and hurt you

[hello-im-queer]

I want to find out how many people are aromantic and/or asexual on Tumblr so i made this

[merely-a-caricature]

Normalize super close friendships instead of assuming there must be a romantic and/or sexual factor—friends are a wonderful treasure!

[fun-k-boards]

Aphobia is crazy because why does my decision not to fuck or romance anybody matter to you

[unpopularvivian]

Okay, so we have the infamous case of Alastor from Hazbin Hotel, GETTING SHIPPED WITH OTHER CHARACTERS ENDLESSLY EVEN THOUGHT HE'S CANONICALLY ASEXUAL. (One of the people on the show accidentally said that Alastor is aroace even though Viv only confirmed he was only ace.)

Peridot is also an example of a character being shipped with Lapis Lazuli so that they're in a wlw relationship. But, Peridot is shown to actively disinterested in fusing which according to storyboard artist Maya Petersen, is a story element that's a metaphor for asexuality and aromanticism.

It's fine if you want to explore relationships with ace/aro or aroace characters as long as you don't erase their identity. But, too many people have been ignoring aroace representation in favor of shipping, which is pretty disrespectful towards the communities.

Asexuality and aromantism are spectrums and so not everybody on it are going to be repulsed by sex or romance.

BUT: If the creator of any aroace, ace or aro character have specifically stated that their sexualities are canon and do not want them to be shipped with anybody and yet people still choose to ship them, that's called being aphobic.

A good alternative to this would be qpr ships. Queerplatonic relationships are relationships are committed intimate relationships between significant others BUT it's not romantic or platonic in nature. It's basically a relationship that's not defined as a friendship or a romantic relationship.

Some aroace people do enjoy being in these relationships while others don't. But it's all based on preferences and it would be good to do some research about these topics so that you don't accidentally stereotype them.

(Hope you learned a thing or two)

Literally Just An Ace Thing:

Me: *Reading a book* How was your first day of discovering your favorite ace, aro or aroace character?

Fandoms: Great Textbook! We made a lot of content for them!

Me: *Instantly puts down my book* Goodiegoodiegoodieletmeseeletmesee! >:)

Fandoms: That's the best part! All of them are romantic or sexual shipping content! :D

Me: ......

Me:

WHAT

[boo-hoo-hooligan]

OUR GRANDPA JUST SAID AROMANTIC RIGHTS

HE SAID "sex isn't really a romantic thing. you can have sex without love and love without sex."

THIS IS COMING FROM AN 80-SOMETHING YEAR OLD MAN. IF SOMEONE WITH SIGNS OF DEMENTIA UNDERSTANDS AROMANTICISM BETTER THAN YOU, PLEASE EDUCATE YOURSELF