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kflixnet · 9 months ago

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Check out our member Lexi's headcanons!

break ups with nct dream

♡ nct dream ﹒ gender neutral!reader genre angst warnings break ups, unhealthy coping, insecurities, some members dont think of themselves very highly, unintentional manipulation maybe ?? ( library )

mark who can’t stop pretending like everything’s fine. mark who is for once thankful of his busy schedule. because when his mind isn’t preoccupied, he finds it always going back to you. now, you only come to his mind late at night when he’s about to fall asleep only to wake up in four hours for yet another schedule. there’s a sick feeling in the pit of his stomach when he realizes the heartbreak is just as fresh as it was the moment it happened. thinks he let you go to easy but also respects you too much to argue. at this time, he’d be too busy talking to you on the phone to fall asleep. something he used to momentarily regret the next day, but now something he yearns for. he turns around and begs hypos to let him sleep.

renjun who wants to scream at the world and god and ask why is this happening. renjun who refuses to talk about it. he doesn’t understand what happened. he thought you guys were doing perfectly fine. you seemed happy, anyway. he can’t tell if he was just too blind to see that you actually were unhappy or if you were just a good actor. he finds himself thinking about what you’re doing, even when he’s busy. he misses you so bad that he’s so angry that you left. he gets even angrier when he sees you with another guy a couple weeks later. but he’s more angry at himself for letting you go. he thinks it’s easier to be angry than upset.

jeno who cries and then gets his emotions out at the gym. jeno who hits the punching bag so hard it manages to fall off the chain. he moves onto the wall next. he ignores the concerned stares from others about the bruises and split knuckles, but is the exact same otherwise. he thinks he’s doing okay, getting his emotions out in the form of his fists, because at least he’s still doing what he needed to do, right? he’s fine, he swears. when he’s laying in bed alone, he can’t help but wonder what you’re up to and type up a message that accidentally seems too much like a booty call. u up? wyd?

haechan who doesn’t have the energy to be his normal self. haechan who is too quiet, blends in with the walls when he’s normally the life of the party. his voice is literally hoarse from crying and begging you to stay for so long. he sends countless messages to you, enough to the point where you blocked him. people wonder where he is only to find out he’s been right next to them the entire time, thoughts consuming him. he spends time overthinking every decision he made in the last six months that led you to break up with him. he can’t find one. it must be him, though. you’d never break up with him without a reason, right? he wasn’t good enough for you, so he has to be better. and with that, he gets off his ass and forces himself into the conversation. he will be better, for you.

jaemin who is so mature when you bring it up. jaemin who doesn’t cry or act like he’s upset about it in front of others. people think he never loved you with the way he acts. that couldn’t be far from the truth. the only way he’ll grieve over your relationship is in his room, alone, with his babies. he accepts your decision, but the what if’s consume his thoughts. what if he hadn’t done that one thing you got angry at him for? what if he hadn’t missed your anniversary date? but he knows he was a good boyfriend, too. he doesn’t think he’ll ever get over you, doesn’t want to, but he knows he has to. he can only hope that you two will find each other later in life.

chenle who fights harder than he’s ever fought. chenle who wants to work it out. ultimately, you win. he cannot help but be a little bit pissed on how difficult you’re being, how you refuse to talk it out and avoid him. he doesn’t even know what happened. he doesn’t think you’re going to stay broken up so he doesn’t even bother shedding a tear. he thinks it’ll be something you two will laugh and then bicker about in fifty years. thinks you’re trying to make him jealous when you try to move on, and it works. doesn’t think before finally cornering you. he gave you your space, now it’s time for you to give him the answers he wants.

jisung who doesn’t understand the concept of space. jisung who has attachment issues. he’ll text you “good morning” and “good night” and tell you about his day without thinking about it because it’s like a routine for him by now. feels so bad and accidentally makes you feel bad for him with his countless apologies. will tweet about you on his priv and forget you’re still on there. doesn’t even want to think about you moving on, and him moving on is out of the question. he truly thought you were his soulmate, but he wanted you to come back to him in your own terms. he’ll spend forever making it up to you, anyway.

#g: 13 #g: angst #g: break up au #warnings: unhealthy coping mechannisms #warnings: insecurity #warnings: manipulation #type: headcanons #a: midmourn #member: lexi #artist: nct dream

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teratomatica · 7 days ago

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you always land on all fours

#umineko #umineko spoilers #ikuko hachijo #ikukos turn for a more serious piece... the old man has reigned for too long #now. INCREDIBLY LONG INCOHERENT TAGS RANT INCOMING FAIR WARNING HAS BEEN GIVEN:#it makes me so so sad how little discussion there is about specifically ikuko because imho she fits so neatly into a lot of the more #overarching Big Themes of the game in a way that i have not ever really seen people take notice of or point out in a meaningful way #like even just off of the top of my head. the significance of names and what it means to go by a name that's Not Yours (she has like 4+)#what it Means to be a witch how it represents a person's deepest insecurities and flaws & how its at its core a coping mechanism #the fact that it takes two to create a universe and trying to do it on your own anyways has the capacity to bring you intense misery #^ (how she's shown to be extremely dismissive of her own work and skill until a collaborator comes into her life and helps/encourages her)#and even the family/patriarchy/misogyny stuff that is so prevalent in the rest of the game comes back around to her. even her Only Friend #(young&stupid atp to be fair) remarks that shes Weird for being unmarried + the little she does say about her past invites the question of #to what extent her self-image stems from her family deeming her a freak outcast & effectively disowning her while celebrating her brothers #and i have lot in my mind about the witch thing specifically because i think her particular situation is very reflective of what umineko's #entire magic system and fantasy facet as a whole is meant to represent for an individual. from what little we see of (what is presumably)#her Real personality she is shown to be deeply self conscious in a way that is JARRINGLY diametrically opposed to both 1.) what we see in #featherine and 2.) what we see when she is acting as a Public Figure. because both of the above are very much purposeful acts that she is #putting on in order to obfuscate her true self. and i have always been very resolute & adamant about not totally equating her to featherine #not only because im very firmly in the camp of “featherine is the avatar of the Pen Name & tohya is part of her too” but also very much b/c #i feel very strongly that the stark differences between the two are very centrally relevant to her character & her psyche. as is the case #with most other witches featherine's personality traits serve to reveal/magnify a lot of ikukos inner workings by playing on her #insecurities/reversing them e.g. ikuko being very quick to downplay her skill/achievements becomes featherine being the COMPLETE opposite #to the point where she barely registers even other witches as living beings rather than just fun touys. BUT even though i do champion the #ikuko/featherine separation so hard i ALSO think it is purposefully relevant that at first glance the line between them seems so blurry #her introduction implying a more nebulous separation between her reality/fantasy counterpart is i think is an intentional move on her part #like it is part of the front she is putting up when acting as the Author. as opposed to Ikuko the person who we (in a way ironically very #similar to the way that the Real Battler is presumably only shown during the boatscene) only very briefly get to see take up screentime #which even on a meta level lines up very well with her apparent underlying nature as a like. extremely private largely reserved/shy person #hit tag limit but if by some miracle anyone is still reading this thank you... please see ikuko with the love she deserves... ok ily byeee

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kyuhu · 7 months ago

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love is in the air or maybe not idk

#lietpol #hws poland #hws lithuania #uhhhh #violence tw #kinda #anatomy is weird??? Also Feliks hair/head as always #affectionately blaming tonitoewyn for sending me a tiktok that may have been unrelated but motivated me to draw this yay #death mention tw #like not really but implied??#idk I'm always so insecure with tag warnings sorry

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shelovee · 1 month ago

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Guys im alive actually

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moonshere · 8 months ago

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Been thinking a lot about this “the family plays isat” AU and how it might happen

Siffrin would probably refuse for them to play it if he was aware of it (thinking about how they said when learning about the diary in the library that they would hate it if someone read their deepest thoughts) and the rest of the family would also respect that, because it really would be a breach of trust. They’d prefer it if Siffrin talked to them himself, after all.

A situation I could see it happening is if, post-Loop battle, Siffrin’s Craft exhaustion got so severe he gets knocked out for a full week or two, maybe more! And the family would be so worried and desperate to understand what happened so that if the game appeared to them suddenly, they’d be tempted enough to play through it. If only just to figure out how to help Siffrin wake up again

(and probably a mixture of other emotions too, wanting to see the conversations Siffrin had with them that they don’t remember, feeling guilty that they didn’t notice soon enough, terrified that Siffrin is hiding something else. I mean, Siffrin straight up did not mention the Loop battle to them at all, even after they promised to talk! so they’d be worried on what happened there already)

Honestly I think all of them would also be exhausted and on bed rest after the whole quest to defeat the King was over, it took months of constant movement and stress so the whole family would crash hard afterwards. Cuz of that they’d be stuck together on like the infirmary or a private room with strict orders to take it easy, what better time to play the game than that?

#isat #in stars and time #isat spoilers #idk how the game appeared to them tho LOL maybe the change god thought it would be hilarious and beamed it to them #or or!! mirabelle prayed for it and since she’s their fav they sent it to her #thinking of them playing it on the same room as Siffrin. glancing back at him in concern the more the game goes on #they wouldn’t have him to warn them so unfortunately they get to have the Bonnie death trauma together oops #hell it would force them to confront their own insecurities together as well! mirabelle revealing that she was never blessed by the change #god and them comforting her. the family quests where each person gets to talk more in detail about their problems. all of them holding each #other accountable to the whole ‘you gotta talk about your feelings and don’t bottle them up’ and they all listen and reassure each other #although I’m unsure how much mirabelle wants to know about her own family quest considering how she said she wanted to figure it out herself #lots of thoughts to be had #moon speaks

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naciablog · 28 days ago

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Nie mogę się powstrzymać.

Chciałam wrócić do czasów, gdy jadłam ile mogłam i nie tyłam.

Byłam chuda,

Wystarczająca.

Ale poznałam @nę

Zaczęłam sie ograniczać,

Nie działało.

Waga stała w miejscu.

Choć byłam idealna, nie widziałam tego.

Chciałam być chudsza.

Zrezygnowałam,

Zaczęłam jeść, tak jak wcześniej,

Ale nie spodziewałam się,

Że me ciało przybierze na wadze.

Teraz patrzę w lustro z obrzydzeniem, i mówię:

Przepraszam An0.

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kflixnet · 2 months ago

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New to KFLIXNET: Check out our member Izzy's timestamp!

[21:15] | nct huang renjun

“Don’t listen to society. Don’t look at their views. You're beautiful and I love you as you are. I promise.”

pairing » nct huang renjun x gn!reader (fast proofread once - lmk if i missed anything!)

trope/au » established relationship au!, non-idol au!

genre » hurt/comfort, fluff and angst (pretty balanced imo), renjun is concerned for your wellbeing, but he loves you and is willing to show that anytime!, renjun is comforting and patient, best boyfriend huang renjun, renjun letting you steal his clothes instead of buying new ones

word count, estimated reading time » 772, ~3 mins

warnings (lmk if i missed anything!) » reader has trouble with body image, reader struggles with body changes in gaining and losing weight, mentions of being stuck between two clothing sizes, weighing body in the first few parts of the story, reader implied medium to long length hair, renjun is taller and physically bigger than the reader

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 nct dream masterlist 🤍 'especially to you...'

to the you who has doubted the image that any reflective mirror has shown you. surround yourself with people who love you as you are and love yourself as you are. you don't need to change and you don't need to force yourself to change.

if you stay true to yourself, treat your body with kindness, you will be able to see yourself in a healthier light.

it's not easy and it never was. the journey to be able to fully smile at yourself when you've been drowned in doubt is hard but i will pray that day for you will come.

It stares you dead in the eyes.

The meeting of the double arrow-like lines would only appear when you put a considerable amount of yourself with the help of gravity. Then when you do, it blinks alive, calculating the shift of your body and the amount of pressure you would willingly give them. You passed the single-digit stage a long time ago, the same time that you overgrew your baby crib. As you age and mature, you watch the first number change and morph, the next number coming along as it accommodates the changes in your body.

It doesn’t help that the scale is reflective, the fear in your eyes clear and the gulp of your throat resonated deeply in your head as you thought of the amount of food that you digested along with the lack of movement that spreads the entire week.

Maybe you shouldn’t have gone shopping today.

Or maybe, you should’ve never gone clothes shopping at all.

Your mind goes back to the image reflected on the shiny surface of the changing room. It tells you that even though you have made progress, the outfit that wraps around your skin isn't as pretty as you depicted on the mannequin by the big shop window.

Hypnotised to see the truth, your other foot raises, leaving condensation on the marbled floor due to stress. But before it could form a footprint on the glass, a pair of arms lifted you, kicking the machine to the best he could given the non-slip stickers on its bottom for user safety.

“You’ve just weighed yourself ten minutes ago,” the fact whispered in your ear directly. Renjun tightens his hold around your waist, resting his chin on your shoulder. “Talk to me, bubs.”

The worried gaze falls upon you as soon as you turn your head sideways. Tears well up in your eyes when Renjun gives a half smile, eyes tender and fingers reaching to swipe the loose strands of hair that tickle your vision.

“I just feel stuck,” you confessed, hitching rapid breaths with the way your boyfriend turns you to face him, lower body slightly bent to face you head-on. “I tried a bunch of clothes today and I feel like I'm stuck between the two sizes—it just feels like,” your eyes wander around the place, the room seemingly spinning and the tears clouding your view.

Renjun’s hands envelop your shaking ones, pulling them closer to the beating of his chest, in an attempt to ground you back to the present. His heartbeat runs through your fingertips, slowly matching his calming ones and eventually syncing when he instructs you to breathe in the cooler air through your nose and exhale the carbon dioxide through your mouth.

“Those clothes aren't good enough for you then,” Renjun’s brown orbs intently focus on your tear-stricken ones. Without another notice, he cups your cheek, his thumb giving reassuring swipes to your itchy and sticky skin from the salt water. “They don't deserve to be put on your beautiful body.”

It sends chills down your system, closing your eyes to further focus on the tapping of his pointer on the back of your palm. Renjun nods, humming to the count of his fingers on your skin, seeing how your throat stops constricting by your cries, hushing you and pressing delicate kisses on your spent eyelids.

“Don’t listen to society. Don’t look at their views. You're beautiful and I love you as you are. I promise,” Renjun’s sincerity hits your body in a warm wave and your eyes are now crying for a different reason. “Oh?” He exclaims amusedly, the hand on your cheek still holds yours to guide your now relaxed face into the broadness and safety of his chest.

Renjun sways his body, alternating his body weight between his legs. A hand is wrapped securely around your waist, the other crossing diagonally across the back of your head. The fingers on top found a home in your scalp, massaging your negative thoughts away.

“I love you too, Junnie.”

The nickname that sounds even lovelier gives his heart life, chuckling and hugging you tighter as he lets out a prolonged squeal, commenting on how adorable you are to him.

Renjun pulls you away momentarily, swooping in for his lips to meet yours, calmly and sweetly, caring and patient. It flows through his gesture and he’s glad you know how much he loves you with the way the corners of your lips could reach your ears.

“Besides,” he starts between the medley of pecks on your face, “why are you shopping for clothes when you're always stealing mine?”

navi/masterlist!! 🤍 nct dream masterlist 🤍 'especially to you...'

tags: @k-films @kflixnet @starlit-network @kstrucknet

#g: 14+#g: established relationship #g: non idol au #g: hurt/comfort #g: fluff #g: angst #warnings: insecurity #warnings: mentions of body image #type: timestamp #wc: 700+#a: from-izzy #member: izzy #artist: nct #m: renjun

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heartbreakscars · 9 days ago

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i have a fear of being fat

i know thats wrong to say

but growing up with crop tops and skinny jeans

and being the only 7th grader with love handles

induced a contract signed with blood

promising to the devil

to never be fat again

i puked and starved

bruised and bled

because of this curse

that seemed like a dream

i wish i knew that devils intentions

before giving away my laughter

my happiness

for something so meaningless

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dollysionalstuff · 3 months ago

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it's getting bad again .・。.・゜✭・

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kflixnet · 1 year ago

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Check out our member Jae's drabble!

like me or like this.?

PAIRING... jay x reader | GENRE... established relationship!au, romance, comfort, fluff, angst | WC... 0.2k | “i’ve always wanted this. i’ve always wanted you.” | mentions of insecurities

“babe, what’s your new year resolution?”

“new years resolution?”

you cock an eyebrow, “yeah, you know—like your goals for the new year?”

jay frowns, “am i supposed to have one?”

you pause as he glances at you questioningly, “do you?”

your boyfriend’s gaze suddenly makes you feel awkward, so you begin to fidget in place subconsciously.

“uh, i guess yeah.”

he hums, “then what are yours, baby?”

you should’ve known better. of course he was gonna ask. it’s not like you could lie either. jay always knew when you weren’t being truthful.

you look down, at a loss for words.

“hey, what’s wrong?” jay grabs one of your hands as a gesture of comfort but it only makes you more… guilty? embarrassed?

“it’s nothing-“

“you don’t want to share?” he asks, his gaze soft.

instead of responding, you only nod.

“that’s fine. i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to pry.”

you’re quick to shake your head and squeeze his hand back to reassure him.

“it’s not that. i-i just realized i had a lot of new year’s resolutions…i just think there’s a lot of things—about myself—that i want to fix.”

jay’s grip tightens as he pulls you closer in between his legs.

“baby…”

“sorry,” you avoid his gaze, “i wish my brain wasn’t like this. i know you probably don’t-“

“i’ve always wanted this. i’ve always wanted you.”

“me? like this?”

you glance at jay, and he immediately reaches up to smooth the furrow between your brows.

“of course. forever and always.”

a/n ▸ hi (again) and happy new year!!🥳 yes i’m finally back and hoping 2024 is a better year for all of us. lots of self reflections for this new year but i’m excited for what will come for this blog and i hope you guys are too ❤️

MAIN TAGLIST ▸ @precioussoulofmine @kynrki @heesterical @jungwonize @rerequire @nvertheless @duolingofanaccount @hoeshii @love-4-keum @luvhyun3 @dimplewonie @yjjungwon @who-tf-soddhi @microwvdstrawb3rri3s @asteria-wood @noajakah236482 @enhacatalog @june-pop @ohsjy

@kflixnet

#g: 13+#g: established relationship #g: romance #g: comfort #g: fluff #g: angst #warnings: insecurity #type: drabble #wc: 200+#a: palajae #member: jae #artist: enhypen #m: jay

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leviiackrman · 9 months ago

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I am fighting for my life to be mentally stable and it’s not working

#personal*#jess talks #trigger warning cus I’m feeling really low and might vent #but genuinely I want to give up #I don’t want to exist #I feel like a burden and a scrounger #I realised yesterday that everything I have is because of someone else #I haven’t earnt anything for myself or done anything with my life #I complain that I can’t support myself #yet I make no effort to fix that #im scared of my insecurity to do anything #I’m scared I’m not good enough #I’m scared to exist in my own home #it doesn’t feel like my home #I haven’t felt ‘at home’ since before uni #I’ve moved house 6 times in the past 7 years #I never feel secure or safe #and I feel responsible #I wish I could just go get a good paying job and support myself and my family #all I want is my independence back like I had at uni #but even at uni I was living off of a loan I’ll never be able to pay off #my whole existence is a waste #I’m contemplating giving up on my art and business because it’s getting me no where #I might as well give up entirely #I can’t see any positive resolutions in sight and I feel so helpless #but all I’m doing is feeling sorry for myself #my parents are sm worse off than I am currently yet I’m the one having panic attacks and terrified to leave my room??#I’m gonna be 26 still living with my parents achieving nothing for myself #with no relationship experience and not an inclining of self respect #grow up Jess

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toxiccrucification · 4 months ago

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is anyone else obsessed with @creepygirl102 from TikTok? like I’m so jealous but I can’t stop watching her.

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kflixnet · 1 year ago

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Check out our member MIssy's fic!

[🐯] windflowers brought me back to you

✿ pairing: beomgyu x reader / idol!txt / non.idol!you / exes-to-lovers (kind of) / very angsty in the beginning but fluff at the end / 8,915 words ✿ disclaimer: cursing and foul language / heavy emotions and insecurities / mentions of food and eating / clichè romantic trope / reader is friends with the other members / reader calls beomgyu ‘gyu’ / the timeline kind of follows their act:lovesick tour / jokes of death in a playful manner / txt members acting like cupids (not them trying to fix your relationship with gyu) ✿ you thought the day that beomgyu broke up with you was the day he had let go of the love he had for you; little did you know, he carried his love for you throughout his tour and came back to fix his mistake. ✿ 🎧: windflower by mamamoo (lofi remix by karma)

note: hi 👉👈 i know i literally dropped off the face of the earth but honestly, life has been a handful but i’m slowly writing things in the drafts and this is one that was sitting on the shelf for a while that i didn’t know how to feel about it so, i’m sending it off the shelf! merry x’mas, lovelies and hope you are all safe and well! 💖

[masterlist 🌸] / @kflixnet ✨

it was a normal day today; it would’ve been, it should’ve been. peace, quiet… the lingering embedded pain in your heart every time your phone receives a notification and you know you’re not going to see a familiar name showing up. at this point, it’s been months. you should move on by now; maybe you were, in some twisted way your heart was healing each time his name rang in your mind and you tried not to show any emotion–cruel, but it was the only way you’d cope. it was progress, one day at a time, slowly, his face will dissolve, his name won’t hurt you when you hear it, and maybe you’ll man up to delete all traces of him from your life.

today, however, that name you’ve been longing for shows up in person by your door–and he only hopes that you still long to see him as he lifts his head up to look at you–all your efforts be damned.

choi beomgyu, who decided to let you go–days before he went on tour–was standing in front of you. the tour merely ended days ago and he had returned home. the first place he was determined to go was wherever you were.

Keep reading

#g: 13+#g: idol au #g: exes to lovers #g: angst #g: fluff #warnings: swearing #warnings: insecurity #warning: mention of food #warnings: heavy emotions #warnings: use of petnames #warnings: jokes about death #type: fic #wc: 8k+#a: qqtxt #member: missy #artist: txt #m: beomgyu

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shelovee · 8 days ago

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When people start calling you skinny again>>>>>

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brown-little-robin · 11 months ago

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zombie au drabble: early in the curing process

so Mob and Ritsu are living alone in a house in Salt Township, right. And at first, Ritsu brings Mob to the hospital and back every day, and that's... pretty much his entire life. He doesn't have to stay on the move anymore. He doesn't even have to scavenge for food or loot corpses. Salt Township gave Ritsu and Mob citizenship as soon as Takane Tsubomi identified them as former neighbors. So Ritsu is allowed to go to the Salt Community Kitchen and take food, just take it, and no one is allowed to shoot at him for stealing or for the crime of traveling with a sick brother.

So Ritsu holes up in the empty house with Shigeo and rations out their last food. People he hasn't seen since he was six years old drop by to say hello and give him things, and he tries to remember how to be normal about it. But eventually, even the gift food runs out, and the hospital food once a day isn't enough. Ritsu has to make a trip to the Salt Kitchen.

And he doesn't want to.

For months, getting food has been one of the most nerve-wracking things Ritsu has had to do. They needed food. To get food, Ritsu had to interact with humans. Taking Shigeo with him was not an option; humans shoot zombies on sight. But Shigeo, alone and sick with no concept of pain, could easily get killed or accidentally injure himself in any number of ways. So Ritsu resorted to gently, apologetically tying Shigeo to trees or poles with his jacket while he went to trade looted stuff for food.

And then, while Ritsu was trying to look normal and healthy for the settlement people, selling them bullets and trying not to think about what the bullets would be used for, he would be imagining how easily Shigeo could snap the arms of that jacket and wander away.

About the time that spring started rotting into summer, when Dimple forced his way into their little party, it became possible to acquire food without leaving his brother alone. But still, Ritsu never left his side.

Even with Dimple around, Ritsu stuck as close to Shigeo as possible. He never liked Dimple, and he completely rejected the idea of leaving his brother in that slimeball's questionable care. He knew Dimple only stuck with them out of some kind of directionless desperation that happened to fixate on his brother's calm strength. Dimple was charismatic enough to found a cult, seemingly benevolent, always smiling, a man who could make zombies and humans alike do his bidding—but Ritsu saw through him. Dimple wasn't a messiah, he was just a little insane. He was a mostly-asymptomatic carrier of zombie disease, Ritsu figured out, just a little too late. He'd realized when Dimple attacked him.

Ritsu never liked Dimple. He's sorry Dimple is dead, though.

After Shigeo snarled louder than Ritsu had ever heard him and fought Dimple to the ground, Dimple had calmed Shigeo down with just a few physical gestures and throaty, wordless sounds. The man was able to communicate with zombies, Ritsu had acknowledged bitterly. And he would be useful on the journey to a cure. So, after the cult dissolved, Ritsu had let Dimple tag along after them. Occasionally, he'd make Dimple get supplies while he stayed with his brother. He never let Dimple stay alone with Shigeo. Didn't trust him that far.

He wishes Dimple was here now.

Ritsu paces in front of the door, rubbing his thumb over the curve of his spoon, one of two pieces of silverware he has left from his parents' house. They need food. Nii-san is only a few days into the cure and not really conscious or anything. Ritsu has to go get food.

His brother is crouching by the functionless TV, fingers running clumsily over the screen, fumbling over the buttons.

"Switch it to channel 5, Nii-san," Ritsu requests idly.

Shigeo makes a toneless throat-sound that might almost be mhm.

He's changing. It used to be a surprise if his brother verbally responded to Ritsu's voice more than once a day; yesterday Ritsu held a whole sort-of-conversation with him, back and forth for minutes on end, until Shigeo's eyelids started drooping. Exhausted. Both Ritsu and Shigeo are getting more sleep now than ever, and they're both still exhausted.

Ritsu's thumb rubs hard along the edge of the spoon. He can't get over it. He hates taking his brother to the hospital, hates being exposed on the street, walking with a zombie, his brother, hates how people stare at them in pity and disgust, hates hates hates how the doctors look from him to Shigeo and back, not sure who to talk to anymore now that the cure is working inside Shigeo. Ritsu hates talking to Shigeo in public even though he doesn't give a shit if people think he's weird. Everyone already does. The thing is, he's been told that everyone in Salt knows zombies are people, but every time someone does a double-take at them he feels like they're going to get shot.

The council made him give up his guns in exchange for shelter. He still has knives, but he feels naked without the firearms.

He's just wasting time thinking about this. Of course he's taking his brother. He can't leave him alone. Not yet. Not until Ritsu is 100 percent certain Shigeo is 100 percent better.

It's stupid to think of this as a choice. Being around adults again must be messing with Ritsu's head. There's no way Ritsu can leave his brother alone, and they have to eat.

Ritsu is still in charge.

And that means he can do this.

Ritsu opens the door and looks back into the house. He waits.

Shigeo looks up from the TV. His misty gaze passes over Ritsu, then his eyes wander back to Ritsu, becoming aware of what an open door might mean.

Ritsu takes a step out the door, and his brother gets up and follows him.

#my zombie au #food insecurity #tagging to be safe #surviving the apocalypse will do that to you #language warning #Dimple isn't actually dead. by the way #no major character death in this AU I promise #Ritsu just thinks he's gone for good. but we all know Dimple is a survivor

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kimmiessimmies · 1 year ago

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Serious question: Is the current walking and talking date between Rachel and Malte boring? Because there's more of it coming, and I thought it would be a cute thing, but now I'm thinking that's just my take on it. So if it's taking the fun out of this update, I'll cut it, I guess.

ETA: I know no one is going to say "yes, it is" because everyone here is much too kind. But I think I need to know... 😕

#insecurity #text post #non sims #about the process #gif warning

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