#tw disowned

[rollthedice-playthecards]

It's not always darkest before the dawn, it seems.

Kanji, Chie and Yukiko attend a wedding, to two certain adults' displeasure.

[somenerdfromwhatever]

I’m reposting this again as clearly some of the world did not listen.

I still stand by every word I said on this post.

Don’t like the facts? Tough. It’s the truth that this world refuses to listen to.

Dear Parents who think disowning their kids are cool

Hi. Apparently I still have this. It’s cool, I’m going to use it for my long thought pieces anyway. Regarding recent events in the LGBT community scene, namely Vivian, a trans-girl going against her dad, Elon Musk himself, I reflected a lot on a question I asked onto Reddit recently (I know I know Reddit sucks but it got me thinking):

Why are some parents so okay with disowning trans kids when they gave birth to them?

This is a pretty tough question with some pretty rough answers, but after seeing the shit I saw last week and now, something has to be said on the matter. Content warning because we're dealing with heavy hitting topics like abandonment, and family drama. Also content warning for what I am about to present because, well, I'm pissed.

It is no secret why I bought the Vivian and Elon Musk thing up to tackle this question as having a billionaire shit talk their own kin that they gave birth to is sickening and inhumane. Heck even before his venture into buying Twitter, he was constantly berating her for just being her own genuine self. Heck in her thread on Threads, her father was a massive deadbeat to her. Unsupportive and hostile who wasn’t there in her life all because her crime was being herself. It’s sad isn’t it? This is one of the most wealthiest humans on the planet mind you, the guy that can end world hunger, have massive funds to pool into medical care to accelerate a cure to cancers, but instead he chooses to defame, harass, and downright abuse his own child for being their true self. And given the recent lights of Elon being a dead beat, I also say in my opinion, he just left her to die. He bought Twitter under the guise of fighting censorship, but yet only to impose his own narrow worldview on others to fuel his slander to his own kin. This hypocrisy is disturbing given recent events as he was fighting for the very thing he fought against.

It’s not just the LGBT community, does anyone else remember that mom from an Autism Speaks documentary about how she wanted to commit a murder-suicide on her daughter just for being autistic? Her name was Alison Singer. A name all too well in the community when discussing neurodiversity and programs that don’t speak for us. You also have the case of Kelli Stapleton who ACTUALLY DID IT.

You also have parents like the ones from Toddlers and Tiaras, where Carly developed a spilt personality disorder thanks to their own MOM because Carly loathed being forced into competitions. Heck I even grew up with the whole DaddyOFive situation where Mike abused Cody. So now the question becomes this:

Why are parents willing to disown their children for being who they are? And regardless of their differences, why would they do that when they are the ones who gave them the life to live on this planet?

And with the rise of LGBT hate, disability hate, it seems like every difference a human makes can make a parents cut ties with them in a heartbeat. With no answer in sight, I might as well make one.

Now, look. What I’m going to address next is harsh, but it’s a reality that every parent needs to accept.

If you are pregnant, and you gave birth to a kid, as newfound parents, that child you are holding in your hand is not your property. They are their own soul, and you better let them be their own soul. They have one life to live on this planet, make their moments count. If you toss them aside, berate them, and even disown because you can't handle differing ideologies, interests, etc. don't call yourself a parent. A parent by definition is being there for your children. A parent who tosses them aside over them being different no matter how or what isn’t a parent at all. And parents who disown them, and kick them out... well. I consider them brain-dead murderers, as they are tossing their kin out to die in society. Yep, I'm going there. Parents who disown and kick their kids out to fend for themselves in society (which they all die too sadly) are murderers.

So what if they express their identity?! So what if they have disabilities they grew up with?! So what?! You still gave birth to them! You lead and support them! And YOU need to give your next of kin independency and not turn them into a slave you can mold in YOUR IMAGE.

This is the TRUE PRO-LIFE STANCE. The actual truth to being PRO-LIFE. To be PRO-LIFE, you have to be PRO-CHOICE as the truth about PRO-CHOICE is letting a human appreciate how they want to live their life and appreciating their own say on the matter. To put it in words that are easier to understand, I inputted this mombo jumbo into GPT to explain it in Caveman:

To support life, you must let people choose how they live. Respect their choice and let them decide. That is true PRO-LIFE.

How is that a hard concept to understand? Like seriously? My parents support my career path to becoming involved heavily in post-production! Heck I'm still on that goal and still dreaming on working on my favorite show on Netflix, Wednesday! They were surprised back when I was a pre-teen about to be heading to high school for this to happen! I was a kid who loves to hold camcorders, a kid who edited a YouTube Poop which landed me into a one-day suspension from school, and a kid who loved making these every day. My parents accepted me for who I was especially since I grew up with autism and it was a new thing TO THEM. Heck even with my Wednesday video gaining traction, my Mom accepted me for being non-binary! So you tell me then, answer me the following: Do you think for just a second that you're doing the right thing by throwing kids like us out? Do you think you're justified in abandoning your own flesh and blood just because they don't fit into your narrow-minded ideals? Newsflash: you're not. You're failing at the most basic level of parenthood. You brought a life into this world; you don't get to just walk away when things get tough or when your child's identity challenges your beliefs. I never watched the Saw movies, but I do seen the complexities of the character John Kramer, the infamous Jigsaw killer. Say what you want, but is he wrong about how we should appreciate life?

To appreciate life, it's means to value all life. All HUMAN life, including the individuality and identity of the next generation. Whether it's your kid you birthed, or a kid passing by, the fact is they are their own soul. You don't control other people's souls, you have to appreciate their own life by their own choices. It's this freedom to be themselves. Letting children grow into their true selves.

Parents, your role if you birth a kid is so straightforward it is astounding how you ignore this.

This isn't about you. I've been on this planet for 25 years now. 25 years. We get it, parenting is hard. My parents had to adapt with my autistic video making non-binary self. They supported everything that I do. You chose to bring a child into this world. You owe them love, support, and acceptance UNCONDITIONALLY. Anything less is a failure on your part, not theirs, YOURS. Disowning your child is the ultimate act that makes you no different then a murderer who kills people just for being different. It's choosing your comfort over their happiness. I would never leave any next generation of mine out to die, and I will accept who they are no matter what they are regardless of interest, disabilities, and identity. I also find it hilarious when this happens, they happened to label them as groomers. Last I checked, the definition of it on every dictionary is "to make (someone) ready for a specific objective". (Verb Definition 3a on Webster's Dictionary for example) Sure it has been co-opted with the abusive nature, but the original definition set is stone is forcing someone onto a specific act. So if you disown a kid for not conforming to your standards on the basis of identity or something else, remember that you, in fact, are the one trying to "groom" them into your image. And if your kid is LGBT, well, that is telling on yourself at this rate, because under this logic and definition that's been there since the dawn of time... you, the parent who disowned them, are the real groomers here and the kids you raised are doing as you said, protecting themselves from groomers like you. You excuse and shift blame onto other people when you are the living definition of it raising your kid in your own image instead of living their own lives. And yes. I fucking said it. It deserves to be said. I stand by this notion.

In this current climate, where LGBT hate is on the rise and intolerance is being amplified by those in power, it's more crucial than ever for parents to stand up and protect their children. And if you are a kid and your parents are like this, abusing you, grooming you into their own perfect image, call them out, because this toxic generational trauma has to end. The world is already a harsh and dangerous place for anyone who doesn't fit into the so-called 'norm.' Take it from me, a neurodivergent who has to mask just to get through. Imagine how much worse it becomes when the very people who are supposed to love and protect you turn their backs on you. Oh to all those deadbeat parents I mentioned, Mike Martin (DaddyOFive), Elon Musk, Kelli Stapleton, Alison Singer, and others. Yeah they are hitmakers, advocates, and superstars in their minds, but to end it with a familiar Kendrick Lamar lyric, they are "fucking deadbeat that should never say more life."

I hope you read that Kendrick Lamar lyric well, because if you disown your kids just for being who they are, you shouldn’t say you’re “for the kids”.

I beg you parents of old and new, please take these words seriously. No kid would ever want a parent like that.

Good night.

[one-time-i-dreamt]

I was disowned by my family for not wanting to do weed. I then cursed their weed using a magic treasure chest.

[venstm]

I’m finally heeding the call and telling my mum I’m trans.

[syscultureis]

plural culture is your parents disowning you cause they found out you're queer and have online friends and wow hahaha i am dissociating so hard rn i cannot feel anything but apathy

I'm so sorry :(

[wheelie-sick]

[ID: a two panel comic. the first shows two people talking while smiling. one person asks "what do you mean former father?" the other person responds "I was disowned" the second panel shows both silently looking uncomfortable]

just in case anyone was wondering why I say "former"

[uncanny-tranny]

I think what so many people don't really get is that nine times out of ten, a child who dosowns their parent/s don't do it on a whim, where the parent is just a victim of circumstance.

On the contrary, we disown our parents for so many reasons, often because of unspeakable abuse, or even because the parent is simply not a good or nice person.

It's important to remember this because when you side with parents/guardians every single time, you will likely be siding with somebody who has inflicted so much harm onto their child. Do you want that blood to wind up on your hands?

[azucar-skull]

I used to be a part of something big...

Being disowned on my mom's side and dealing with loss on my dad's side is something I wish didn't happen at the exact same time. My mom's side hated me for being the mixed child, a product of their daughter marrying a Mexican man. They hated me more when I came out. But...

I still loved them...

.

Sorry for the sudden vent art drop. I woke up to a panic attack this morning and felt like drawing. Maybe I should've saved this for FCAU lol. Yk...with Casey being half-Kraang and his Kraang side treating him and his mom poorly and yada yada all that--

[veludo-rae]

hopefully my mum is just upset with me and saying things she doesn’t mean and isn’t actually cutting me off forever and stopping supporting me financially because I love my family a lot and also don’t have money haha. She’s probably joking I hope bc otherwise I don’t really know what I’m gonna do haha. ig I should open commissions soon lol

[aceing-on-the-cake]

CW: Religious Trauma, Disowned by Parents, Familial Abuse(disownment), SI mention, generalized angsty rant

I go through life a lot not thinking about the fact that like I've gotta form an entire support network from the ground up because of being raised in a cult. Like most people when they get kicked out from their house for being queer they have *some people*. Maybe it's extended family, aunts, uncles, grandparents. Maybe it's like a friend group. Maybe it's the friend's parents who are like your surrogate parents already. I don't know. But it's someone. They have people. They have base connections already with which they can make more off of.

But I just, don't.

I left a cult and lost every parent. I lost every sibling. I lost every surrogate aunt, uncle, and grandparent because I already didn't have actual extended family. I lost every friend I'd ever had. I. Lost. Every. Person. I. Knew.

And yeah, you can make more. That's the beautiful thing about humans, they grow and they heal no matter where you put them.

But it takes time, and that's time spent floundering around in my early twenties making stupid mistakes that cost me a lot because I don't have the parents to bounce things off of. That means trying to make friends and coming up with a total of 1 or 2 because all the normal times people made friends, school, college, etc, I was in, a fucking cult.

And like, I keep going. I live by a fuck it you thought I'd off myself out here and so I refuse to ever do so even when I was literally alone. I am out here pulling myself forward inch by inch with coffin-fucking-bloody hands (TM Berklie Novak-Stolz) and I move on and I live and I forget and it doesn't come up every single day of my life that I'm alone, even now, I'm so more alone than a human is supposed to be. I am making a found family but that cannot replace the grandparents I am supposed to know, the aunts and uncles I am supposed to be able to connect to, the parents I am supposed to be able to turn to. It helps, god does it fucking help, but you can't replace those things. And if you can, I have not figured out how.

[void-snakat]

Plan to get a binder in rural Appalachia :3

> It's Halloween in October. > Say I want to cosplay as a guy character or a flat character (prbly the latter for safety :3) > My Dad (<- the main bigot (when it comes to politics mom just listens to him)) is weeb, dweeb and a nerd (only derogatory cause fuck him) so if I am going for accuracy he might let me have one for the costume. > But until then I have to be EXTREMELY not sus ;3 > So he doesn't think I'll keep it or use it after the costume > AND hope he doesn't take it immediatly after so I can't use it > Let's hope this works cause some days I'm this close 🤏 to taping or other non-savory things (like a break down don't worry Abt me) :D

[aoikamii]

The family sa’er got near me so i showed her a picture of jimmy and said “this is you” BAHAHAHAHDHSHAHAHAHAHAAHA

[mbrainspaz]

my mom got all teary eyed after I hugged everyone in the kitchen except her. What does she want from me? I was polite all evening. I treated her like I'd treat anyone who didn't want to get to know me. She's the one who said I was dead to her as long as I did this whole 'demonic non-binary nonsense' and she 'wants her daughter back.' I tried everything I could do to get her to see the rest of me but she never even asked a single question. She didn't want to know. She didn't want to know me. She was so amped up to be a martyr to the satanic leftist trans agenda. Are we having fun yet? How's the payoff?

honestly it hurt me to see her cry just like it always has but I just had to remind myself that she's choosing to be a victim of her own ignorance and gods know I already spent the worse part of the last decade trying and failing to fix that. I'm outta there.

[lowpolytigerthing]

Haha. Haha I love taking the. Taking the queer and therian pins off my backpack. Mhm. I do enjoy this country

[npdbenrey]

me (narc), remembering all the times my mom (therapist) shittalked pwNPD directly to my face.

[toxicsludgeyaoi]

Having seen that post regarding JKR and... that one poll runner's very long winded response refusing to answer if they supported her or not, I wanted to make this clear:

I do not support JKR. I am a trans person myself, and if I see anyone being bigoted on this blog I will not tolerate it.

Just in case anyone was unsure on my stance since i allowed HP submissions. People's lives are not politics- or, well, they shouldn't be.

If you support JKR or agree with her views, please leave! Thanks :>