#toxic family

[manifestingmodel]

Me yesterday at my mum’s birthday.

To be fair - it’s such a skewed situation. I just wanted to be there for her and I wanted to be ignored. It seems like everybody had a problem with me keeping to myself but like…as someone who is adopted I just never fit into the family. And I’m so much older now. It’s not going to happen all of a sudden.

Watching my cousins and other relatives interact was fine - I actually preferred it. But then my father and mum made me so uncomfortable by airing out my business in front of the very people who openly judge me.

This is exhausting. I feel bad for saying this. I feel like it makes me sound so awful but…I cannot wait until I am no longer tied down to these people and I’m no longer obligated to be made a form of “entertainment” at these events.

I’m a human being. Not a prop.

I just wanted to enjoy my dinner in peace and be there for my mum. I didn’t sign up for everything else that followed.

I’m exhausted. Yes, I said it twice.

[foxlungz]

I will always be so fucking angry for what they turned me into

[recoverr]

shoutout to all the kids with good people as bad parents. the parents who were sympathetic, honest and kind to everyone until you were the next in line. the parents who loved the entire family except you. the parents who preached about acceptance, warmth and kindness, but never offered it to you. the parents who were understanding to friends, cousins or siblings, but not to their own children. the cognitive dissonance is surreal, but i promise it is not a reflection of your own worth. you deserve more.

[flock-of-cassowaries]

My parents have been threatening to die since 2009 (both histrionically, and medically), but have somehow still failed to do so.

I have several hypotheses for what could be going on:

1. They’re somehow feeding on each other’s loathsomeness to form some sort of hateful oroboros of perpetual unpleasantness, and this has made them immortal.

2. The rumours that circulated at my elementary school about my father being a vampire were accurate. (He has blood cancer and he won’t tolerate garlic in his presence, so there’s a strong argument to be made. But this theory doesn’t account for my mother’s continued presence in this situation, unless we’re thinking he has some sort of Barnabas Collins enthralment powers, which honestly would king of make a lot of sense.)

3. The admissions departments for heaven and hell are still wrangling over whose problem my parents are. (The answer seems pretty clear, but neither side wants them.)

3.1. Alternatively, the Grim Reaper just refuses to have anything to do with them. (Much like what happened with Henry Kissinger.)

Before I went no contact with them, I'd sometimes complain about my parents to my partner (whose parents are great but he knows very well what mine are like) and he'd say "well they're getting old, and they're covid deniers and don't trust doctors...who knows, they might die soon" which I loved, it was so reassuring, I wish more ppl had the balls to bring that kind of energy

[witchyykitten]

everyone talks about cutting off a toxic parent

but no one ever talks about the pain of wanting a parent but knowing yours cannot love you the way they should

[pretendmynameispoetic]

3:13 pm at home

“Being around my family for an extended period of time makes me physically ill. I don't know how else to explain it…”

[ed-recoverry]

Inspired by the Cody Ko situation…

Shoutout to all “imperfect victims”

Though there are no such thing as an imperfect victim, shout out to all victims who have traits that make people hesitate to believe you.

Shoutout to victims who lie a lot.

Shoutout to victims who have hurt others.

Shoutout to victims who have done bad things.

Shoutout to victims who are “annoying” or “unlikeable.”

Shoutout to victims who are hard to be around.

Shoutout to victims where the lines are blurred.

Shoutout to victims who are “difficult.”

Shoutout to victims who are “complicated.”

Shoutout to victims whose case was quickly dismissed.

Shoutout to victims who were blown off.

Shoutout to victims who were hurt by a “good” person.

Shoutout to victims who exaggerate.

Shoutout to victims who forget details.

Shoutout to victims who don’t “act” like a victim (whatever that means).

Shoutout to victims who are addicts or criminals.

Your reputation and or bad characteristics do not erase what you went through. You know what happened to you is real. And that’s all that matters. I believe you and others will too.

[dragonheartstring360]

can’t emphasize enough how when you grew up in a toxic environment, being in the room with someone who’s angry or frustrated - even if it has nothing to do with you - is absolutely terrifying cuz you’ve been 1000% conditioned to assume frustration = all hell is going to break lose and be aimed directly at you

[nmolesofadrenaline]

[justabittraumatized]

girls be like “fighting demons😤🤪” and the demons be their moms

[cats-healing-diary]

I have my father's rage inside of me. And it's getting bigger and bigger, I can't stop it this time. It's killing me, I don't wanna turn into him, I hate this man sooo much, he has ruined my life.

[queerism1969]

[enmesheddaughterparentified]

Are you normal or do you have hypervigilence problems because you always had to be aware of your family members moods growing up in order to deescalate situations before the arose

[feralboo-the-weirdo]

You know what is just mind boggling? Neurotypical people exist. Like there are people who can just DO things and not have depression, anxiety (in every form ever), RSD, sensory overloads, and not get overwhelmed. Like there are people who can work for eight hours every day and still do things after. People who can make phone calls with no struggle. Who aren't constantly bombarded by a cacophony of thoughts both good and bad when they do things. Who have anxiety but it isn't crippling. who can spend hours, WEEKS with people and not get tired or fear that everyone there hates you. People who have no idea what Depression or intense trauma feel like. People who hear instructions and do it right first go. People who can follow a conversation without zoning out, or having to mask.

Like. Do neurotypical people actually exist?

Because I can't even imagine what it would be like to be neurotypical. Or mentally healthy. Both sound alien and foren. But like. Obviously they exist because neurodivergent people wouldn't struggle so much if not for how the world was structured for Neurotypical people but I don't know if I've ever met a neurotypical.

idk. food for thought I guess.

[staltheoneandonly]

i feel like there's a point being the oldest sibling where you stop being your parents' child and start being just some person who happens to live in the house

[witchyykitten]

'you're so sensitive'

THANKS

i was never fully allowed to express my emotions as a child because when i did i would get yelled or made fun of