#toxic mothers
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âyou canât heal in the same environment that made you sickâ
i didnât get this until someone put it into words. iâd never understand why i always felt better when i locked myself alone in my room rather than spending time with my toxic family. i never understood why i was bubbly and outgoing when i was with my friends but my energy was immediately drained the second i got home. i didnât understand why regardless of the effort i put into healing i would keep getting triggered by people in my family. i never understood it until i read that sentence and it all just clicked. i canât heal in an environment where the people are benefiting from my suffering. where the people donât want to change the behaviour which affects me negatively.
#mommy issues#daddy issues#parent issues#toxic parents#toxic behavior#toxic mothers#toxic household#childhood trauma#inner child#desiblr#academia#dark academic aesthetic#desi academia#dark academism#desi dark academia#chaotic academic aesthetic#art academia#chaotic academia#academia aesthetic#trauma#healing#self healing#healing journey#journal#thoughts#deep thoughts#spilled thoughts#spilled emotions
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One of the worst realizations that I have ever made is realizing that all I ever wanted was to be loved by my parents. I never would've turned out like this if they just loved me unconditionally.
#i will never care if you reblog#vent#tw vent#cw vent#eldest daughter syndrome#eldest daughter#parentified child#parentification#toxic mom#cw toxic relationship#toxic parents#toxic mothers#toxic mother#toxic family#toxic father#toxic relationship#childhood neglect#childhood trauma#childhood emotional neglect#emotional trauma#trauma coping#trauma#wanting to be loved#i wanna be loved#sad thoughts#eldest sibling syndrome#eldest sibling#eldest sister#toxic thoughts#thoughts to throw into the void
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Enmeshment and Parentification
Here are some mental health links about enmeshment and parentification. I hope it helps someone. Mine is mostly on the perceptive of my mother.
#mental health#links#articles#enmeshment#parentification#emotional parentification#toxic mothers#I have felt responsible for my mother's emotions and emotional state since I was at least twelve
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My mother was prone to fits of towering rage, but she was completely incapable of reflection and never sought to investigate the reasons for her emotions. ... Whenever I defended myself against this unjust treatment, sometimes going so far as to actually prove my innocence to her, she interpreted this as a systematic attack on her person and frequently retaliated with ferocious punishments. She confused emotions with facts. As she felt attacked by my explanations, she took it for granted that I was actually attacking her. A capacity for reflection would have been necessary for her to realize that the real reasons for her feelings has nothing to do with my behaviour. But remorse was completely foreign to her. Not once did she apologize to me or express any kind of regret. She was always "in the right".
Alice Miller - The Body Never Lies, The Lingering Effects of Hurtful Parenting
#narcissistic mother#toxic mothers#toxic mother#narcissistic abuse#surviving narcissism#narcissistic family#narcissistic trauma#cptsd#trauma
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âBless the daughters who sat, carrying the trauma of mothersââ
Mommy issues.
/creating.sophie/Class of 2013 (Mitski)/Lady Bird (Greta Gerwig)/Persephone Made Me Do It (Trista Mateer)/Ijeoma Umebinyo/Wildflower Wildfire (Lana Del Rey)
#mother issues#toxic mothers#web weaving#compilation#collage#creating.sophie#mitski#lady bird#greta gerwig#trista mateer#Ijeoma Umebinyo#tw childhood trauma#tw mother issues#lana del rey#mommy issues
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*My mom cussing me out and telling me everything Iâm doing wrong*
teenage me who was literally just trying to be helpful:
#Tw child abuse#abusive parents#toxic parents#mommy issues#mother issues#toxic mothers#Yelling mention#Family issues#family trauma
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revelation of the day: women who experienced a prolonged loss of girlhood and had their childhood innocence robbed are often the bitter mothers obsessed with âthe feminineâ and passing their flawed notion of femininty onto their daughters. this of course also applies to women who were exposed early on to societyâs ideas of femininityÂ
#mommy issues#is that why they're obsessed with our weight#toxic mothers#its the patriarchy#mentally ill bitches be like
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TW: eating disorders
There is something so unique about the flavòr of disordered eating that daughters inherit from the mothers who use them as a personal therapist, dumping heedless complaints about their own body image struggles, diet attempts, âdonât ever get fat, remember that, youâll never be able to lose it again,â and âIâm so desperate to lose weightâ and âwhen you get fat, no one loves you anymore.â
Never paying any thought to how it impacts the daughter. đ
#toxic mothers#emotionally immature parents#narcissistic mother#ace talks to herself#mother was complaining about her weight gain again this morning#*iâm walking every day! itâs not fair!!!*#sheâs not walking very much#and she eats a phenomenal amount of food#*iâm getting so desperate!!!*#while she changes nothing about her eating habits whatsoever#and my old eating struggles are flaring up again#but sheâs too wrapped up in herself#to ever notice that anyone else has problems outside of herself
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I am filled with all the love that was never given to me. I am not my mother.
#affirmation?????#i talk to everyone like Iâve known them forever because Iâm scared no one ever wanted to know me#itâs kinda selfish bc everything I do is a plea for my mother to apologise#how hard was it? I do it every single day#I never forget a birthday#every object is a potential present#I Will stand up for you if youâre hurt#I Will stay with you if youâre scared#I donât have to know you#emotional abuse#family issues#mommy issues#mental health#love#adhd#family#toxic mothers#toxic family#friendship#affirmations
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me when i have to do another breathing exercise and count to 10 after my mom says the most vile, traumatizing thing to me because if i say what is really on my mind it would make the situation 100x time worse
#going to therapy because the people who actually need therapy donât go#mommy issues#this is my life now#parent issues#daddy issues#toxic mothers#mother#toxic#toxic parents#toxic mom#toxic relationship#parents#toxic family#family trauma#trauma#i'm traumatized#eldest daughter#the eldest daughter#eldest sibling
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It's terrible knowing that if I ever show sadness or show anything emotion that's not positive towards anything whether it's my fault or not I'll either get blamed for it or told that my emotions are irrational.
#i will never care if you reblog#im so tired#i just wanna escape#vent#tw vent#cw vent#eldest daughter syndrome#sad thoughts#eldest daughter#eldest sibling#oldest daughter#toxic mother#emotional neglect#emotional abuse#emotional abandonment#toxic mothers#toxic mom#toxic parents#thoughts to throw into the void
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The thing about a mother's hate is that it's not that different from a mother's love
Sam Gordon, âA Motherâs Hate
#dark academia#quotes#academia#academia aesthetic#dark academic aesthetic#poetry#love#hate#love and hate#mothers#toxic mothers
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Mother's will really say the most vile shit to their daughters and still sleep like as if it hasn't changed the trajectory of my existence
So you want me to be here or just stop ?
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The funny thing is...the spankings aren't what stirs up from the muck when I think of bad childhood memories.
It was the yelling and screaming and guilt trips and the reckless driving when she was upset and the storming into my room and the angry outbursts whenever I had to ask for something for school. It was the way the energy changed when she got home in the evenings and how she criticized my friends and how she threatened suicide whenever faced with the truth of how she had hurt me. It was the way she would be always be the aggressor when my parents fought and how she'd scream at me to call the police on my own father and how I wouldn't because even then, I could plainly see he wasn't doing anything to harm her, merely yelling back in defense. I think the difference for me was that the discipline spankings were nearly ritualized. It was an 'uh oh, we fucked up. Line up. Okay, we're done, move on with your day'. VS never knowing when you were going to set her off and never knowing when the onslaught would end once it started. And when mom was the one who got physical it was usually so buried in the emotional crap that it didn't even phase me, except in one case where I legitimately did not understand she was being sarcastic and got kicked hard from behind and with no warning over it.
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The Mother Wound: a term to describe a lack or loss of a healthy relationship with your mother.
For anyone currently dealing with a dysfunctional, toxic, or unhealthy relationship with their parents, especially toxic mothers:
We are Poetry Orchard, an Asian/Black/disabled led collective hosting online creative writing workshops. They are geared towards poetry, but all creative and curious are invited!
On Friday, June 14 @ 2 PM EDT, we are holding a workshop on the topic of the mother wound. Through writing, we will examine the anger, loneliness, grief, confusion, and guilt that arises from this connection, giving a platform to process and communicate our emotions.
We will read a selection of works relating to the theme and hold an affirming and therapeutic discussion about the materials, followed by a brief group writing session driven by unique prompts. You are invited, but not required to share your work. If you do, though, positive feedback is guaranteed! â¨
Video and mic are not required - many attendees interact via chat. You can sign up here or reach out to us for a free ticket!
#the mother wound#toxic mothers#toxic family#toxic parents#dysfunctional family#dysfunctional household#hi nashira here i'm posting it like this because tbh i am really not sure how else to connect with people who have mothers like mine#poetry#writeblr#writing prompts#poetry community#poets on tumblr#poetry workshop#creative writing#poetry prompts
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I just love it when my mom complains about doing mom things like taking care of her children she had and being a mom.
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