#family trauma

[cerleansky]

My therapist was so real for saying the meaning of life is found in connection.

People hug their friends when they meet up and hug them a little tighter when it comes time to say goodbye. My grandfather rebuilt the broken rocking horse my grandmother had as a child, a gift from her father. There's an indescribable ache that goes along with seeing someone you used to know intimately, the becoming of a common stranger. Coincidences that bind, one time I got an uber and the driver used to live in my home before me. It was the last place he saw his father alive as a child and he nearly cried when I told him the walls were still the same colour.

Has anyone ever gotten over their childhood best friend? Is that alone not a testament to the fact we are more than blood and bones.

It's all about connection, friends.

[punishedlamb]

“jesus can always reject his father. but he cannot escape his mother’s blood.”

family tree ( intro ) - ethel cain.

[curseofsisyphus]

always an angel never a god

take my uquiz guys!! (tw teeny bit of gore)

are you the angel or the god

[elithelakes]

sure, we all love found family in fiction. but recently i’ve been thinking about what exactly draws me to it so much. and thinking about it, it’s unfortunately all too obvious. i’m obsessed with the idea of someone not being required to support and love another person, but doing so anyways, and doing it to such an extent that they essentially become family to each other. why? well, there were people in my life that should have automatically supported and loved me, but they didn’t; it’s the idea of someone doing something by choice what someone else wouldn’t even do by requirement. what one person saw and said “that’s an unlovable mess” another person saw said “maybe you are a mess but i’m going to go out of my way to love you anyways”. needless to say i’ve been crying for a while.

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

Please take kids seriously they are actually people. sentient intelligent beings believe it or not. they know when they’re being blatantly lied to.

They might not understand it, but they know when grownups are being shady.

They know.

Please stop acting like it’s inconsequential if you lie to them or ignore them or dismiss their thoughts and feelings. It’s not. It stays with them forever.

Please take kids seriously.

[thatweirdgirlyousatnexttoinmath]

It's been almost five years since The Haunting of Hill House came out on Netflix. And it has irrevocably changed my life.

The depiction of grief. Addiction. Depression. Loss. Identity. Family relationships. Family dynamics. Healing your inner child. Having to deal with your inner child. The fact that in some ways you never really grow up, you're that exact same person inside that is dealing with all these increasingly complex and difficult things, trying hard to not let the child in you react because you know it shouldn't.

Thinking about Theo taking her gloves off. Nell going to therapy, putting in work, and still having her demons chase her around all the way to the end. Shirley's entire life and career being based around wanting to help people in their darkest moments the way someone helped her (though isn't that what they all do, too? Especially Theo). Luke as the youngest, being left behind or not believed and eventually having to find ways to self-soothe, which as an adult are not as health-friendly as other options out there. But it's what he had to do to cope. And Steve... everyone knows a Steve.

I know people have commented before about the five Crain siblings and the five stages of grief. But they also each experience those themselves, and in some ways the five of them simply display how much grief and living can do to a person. Juxtaposing the entire modern part of the series with them as children reminded me how much the things I do now can also be drawn back to little Me. The decisions I make, what scares me, who I reach out to. What haunts me? I may not have a big scary terrifying Death House in my past, but I mean... we've all got our version of a big scary terrifying Death House.

The tragedy of Hill House, the complicated love that's shown, the connections and relationships we have with our families, the world, ourselves. I cannot, will not, should not, would not forget it.

[maybe-an-aspd-angel]

[moondustinfj]

"I hated the lot of them: my parents with their pure-blood mania, convinced that to be a Black made you practically royal..."

"..my idiot brother, soft enough to believe them... that's him. He was younger than me, and a much better son, as I was constantly reminded."

"From what I found out after he died, he got in so far, then panicked about what he was being asked to do and tried to back out."

"For years he talked of the Dark Lord, who was going to bring the wizards out of hiding to rule the Muggles and the Muggle-borns... and when he was sixteen years old, Master Regulus joined the Dark Lord."

"To the Dark Lord. I know I will be dead long before you read this, but I want you to know it was I who discovered your secret. I have stolen the real Horcrux and intend to destroy it as soon as I can. I face death in the hope that when you meet your match, you will be mortal once more - R.A.B."

[composer-clover]

i am grieving my upcoming illusory death

counting down the days to my living funeral

where i will be as good as dead in your eyes

while i just stand here

tears, no doubt, streaming down my face

and you ignore me like a ghost

not fully dead, but in my own hellish purgatory

for not doing as you say

[fuckyeabowties]

He really is so much like his mother. Bending reality to his whim without realizing it. And having it be heavily influenced by his childhood interests. Bravo 👏🏻 fantastic parallels to Wandavision. Did not see that twist coming. Truly love how dramatic the Maximoffs are.

[dittomoon]

So, I drew this back in October 2021 but only shared it on the BoJack Horseman Reddit - I liked the idea of lining up the diamonds in Bojacks family tree, ending up with Hollyhock breaking away from their family trauma. I only realised after the sketch that Honey doesn’t have a diamond but I still wanted her to be at the top.

[sarnai4]

I can't stop thinking of how both Ody and Pen are victims of sexual harassment/assault (depending on how far the suitors got because we already know Calypso is a predator). Now, I am just going to hope that the reason Telemachus said he also had been staying in his room in "Legendary" wasn't because one of those sickos was fine with acting that way towards children too. Nope. That's not a thought I'm letting get into my brain...I just can't let it. The whole family couldn't have gone through this. It's just too cruel.

[vinesinmyheart]

Baby Boy

So much hair,

Slender fingers,

Tiny feet in my palms.

Round cheeks,

Wide belly—

You were made for loving.

From my body,

Now came yours.

We grew up together,

First-time mom,

First-time son,

Fumbling through life with love

And understanding,

Bonded as true as the bluest sky.

You’re an adult now,

And you’ve decided to throw me away.

It’s okay,

It’s okay.

I suppose I taught you

To treat me as men always have.

Happy birthday, baby boy.

I wish I’d given you a better gift.

[mj-iza-writer]

Whumptober Day 13

Team as Family - Familial Curse - Multiple Whumpees - "Death will do us part" (Set it Off, Partners in Crime.)

Leader glared at his teammates; arms folded over his chest in annoyance.

His team didn't dare look in his eyes.

Leader was ticked, and it was their fault.

Caretaker came down and sat on the couch across from them.

"How is Whumpee?", Leader turned to look at Caretaker. Their face had changed to worry.

"Upset. They don't want to come down. I'm going to take some dinner up to them in about an hour. They said they should be back to normal by then. They don't want anyone else to see them until then", Caretaker sighed, and looked at the other members, "all of you knew they had this. You all screwed up big time tonight."

"We didn't know that's what they would like though", one of them spoke up.

"Yes, and that's when you ask questions, if the mood was right, or at least not make fun of it", Leader turned and looked at them again, "this also tells me that you all don't pay attention to meetings, because I absolutely explained to all of you what happened to Whumpee and what they would like if the curse was triggered."

"You all really hurt their feelings", Caretaker frowned, "we are a family. You can't go doing that. It messes with trust. If we can't trust each other, then we as a team are screwed."

Leader sighed, "Caretaker is right. It is fine not to understand Whumpee's differences. I don't fully understand them myself. That's why we ask questions. If you don't feel comfortable asking Whumpee, then ask Caretaker. They know a lot about Whumpee and this curse thing. If it's something they can't talk about, then they won't."

"We're sorry, we screwed up. We know", another one of them spoke up.

"Yes, I appreciate that, but I am not the one to apologize to", Leader looked at Caretaker.

"They do not want any visitors. I guess you all get to live with the guilt until you can get to Whumpee", Caretaker stood, "if you'll excuse me. I'm going to go make their dinner. I'm thinking grilled cheese and tomato soup. It's one of their favorites. Something comforting since their team... their family has jokes."

"Let me know if you need anything", Leader frowned.

"Can do", Caretaker made their way out of the room.

"Just as Caretaker said. None of you bothers Whumpee until they are ready. I want you to work hard on your apologies as well. None of this half done apology crap you all pull when you screw up on missions. You're dismissed."

Leader wandered into the kitchen just in time for the blender to go off.

Caretaker looked up at them and grinned.

"Pulling out all the stops?", Leader smiled, "it's smells amazing."

"Tomato soup always tastes better when it's made fresh. I had everything I needed to make a scratch made tomato soup, so I thought Whumpee would enjoy it. A little pick me up", Caretaker watched as another member walked in.

"It smells so good. Is this what we are having for dinner?", the teammate backed away when they caught Leader's eyes.

"I'm only making enough for myself, Whumpee, and Leader, if they want some. The rest of you will fend for yourselves tonight. All of you are adults, yes", Caretaker frowned, "though after the childish behavior earlier... I'm starting to wonder."

"You both have been really cold today", the teammate turned.

"Whumpee is currently crying. They are sprawled across their bed... crying..... because of all of you", Caretaker frowned, "the way I see it, you all could use a little coldness. You've gotten too comfortable saying things without thinking. I hope you all enjoy your dinner tonight."

After the teammate left, Leader turned to look at Caretaker. A huge grin across their face.

"I will definitely take some of that soup", Leader commented, "and a sandwich. You said Whumpee wanted grilled cheese? I can help make it."

"I appreciate that, but I'll make Whumpee's for them. They can be picky when they're upset. If you feel up to it, you can make yours and mine though", Caretaker smiled.

"I'll do that", Leader nodded.

Leader followed Caretaker up the stairs.

"Whumpee, I have grilled cheese and soup. Freshly made. Leader is here with me. Can we come in and talk with you", Caretaker leaned an ear on the door.

"Yes", a weak reply came from the room.

Caretaker opened the door and let Leader come in with the tray.

"I see some of it has died down", Caretaker commented as they studied Whumpee.

"Yes, some of it won't go away", Whumpee frowned as they looked over themself, "I'm about to take a cheese grater and scrape it off."

"No you won't. I will not let you. More work for me if you're bleeding", Caretaker sighed as they watched Leader set down the tray in front of Whumpee, "Whumpee it will go down in time. You have to let it run its course though."

"It will only come back again", Whumpee sighed, "I'm a walking freak."

"No you're not", Leader spoke up, "Whumpee, I know this is hard for you. What was said and joked about earlier was uncalled for. You're not a freak."

"Leader look at me", Whumpee bared their arms to show them off, "this doesn't happen to normal people."

"You're not normal. That's perfectly fine. I'm not normal either for different reasons", Leader sat down beside Whumpee, "I've never wanted to be normal", Leader pulled up their sleeves, "I may not have some curse handed down from generation to generation, but I come from a long line of leaders. My scars match those of my father's and grandmother's."

Whumpee looked up wide eyed after looking at the scars that lined Leader's arms.

"At the end of the day, mine will not disappear either. I wouldn't want them to. It's part of who I am. Your markings that come out every once in a while are part of you. I hope one day you might be able to at least be okay with them. You don't have to like them, but just to accept them."

Whumpee looked down and saw the markings on their arms were gone, "I'm sorry Leader... and Caretaker."

"There's nothing to be sorry about", Leader smiled, "how everyone acted earlier was uncalled for, and I will make sure they apologize properly."

Caretaker smiled as they looked at Whumpee, "I hope you know how loved you truly are amongst our team. Even if the others have a bad way of showing it. You are so important to this team."

"Thankyou", Whumpee's eyes sparkled.

"You're welcome", Caretaker sighed, "now all of that hard work to make your dinner, and it's getting cold. Which means Leader's and mine are also getting cold in the kitchen."

"Sorry", Whumpee giggled, "can I eat with you two?"

"Yes", Leader looked around for a seat.

"We can go down stairs... I feel better", Whumpee smiled.

Caretaker and Leader watched Whumpee start to eat before they, too, started their meals.

"Are you dipping your sandwich in your soup?" Leader watched Whumpee as they ate.

"Yes... You've never done that with your grilled cheese?", Whumpee looked at them worriedly.

"Leader grew up amongst soldiers... they didn't get to learn to play with food", Caretaker smiled as they dipped their sandwich, "try it Leader, you'll probably love it."

Leader looked at the sandwich they had already started to eat, then at the bowl of soup. They plungedbthe sandwiches into the soup.

Caretaker and Whumpee watched as Leader took a big bite of the soup covered sandwich and watched their face light up.

"That's incredible", Leader grinned, and went for another bite.

"Healing childhood traumas one day at a time", Caretaker grinned as they watched Leader and Whumpee eat the meal gleefully.

Leader looked up with a sparkle in their eyes, "this is amazing. Why haven't I been told this before?"

"I never thought about it. Plus, you never sit down long enough to eat", Caretaker smirked.

Leader smiled, "that might change. Especially if this is the meal."

"I finally found you're comfort meal", Caretaker watched them get the other half of the sandwich, "easy enough."

Leader nodded, "thankyou."

"Thankyou", Whumpee repeated.

"You're both welcome", Caretaker nodded, 'my little trauma holders', Caretaker frowned internally. I'll take care of you both and make sure you heal. I swear it.'

"Are you okay?", Leader looked at Caretaker worriedly now.

Caretaker realized the frown came out on their face.

"I'm fine, just had some thoughts", Caretaker smiled again, "it's alright though. Let's eat."

Leader and Whumpee nodded, and returned to happily enjoying their meals.

'I love you both.... so much', Caretaker thought to themself again, 'so much.'

Taglist. As always please let me know if you want to be added or taken off of the list. It's not a problem at all.

@villainsandheroes @the-beasts-have-arrived

@sacredwrath @porschethemermaid

@monarchthefirst @generic-whumperz

@bloodyandfrightened @freefallingup13

@notpeppermint @cyborg0109

@idontreallyexistyet @painfulplots

@whumpbump @everythingsscary

@skittles-the-whumpee @expressionless-fr

@theforeverdyingperson @legendarydelusiongoatee

@candleshopmenace @whumpanthems

@lavndvrr @ivymyers

@starfields08000 @a-living-canvas

@lumpofsand @watermeezer

@indigoviolet311 @whumpy-mountains

@3-2-whump @risk606

@electrons2006 @paperprinxe

@whumprince @kaz-of-crows

@mis-graves @decaffeinatedtimetraveler94

@sausages-things @ragin-cajun-fangirl

@isikedmyself878 @daffyduckcommittedtaxfraud

@valravnthefrenchie @glennemerald

@jasperthecapser @does-directions

@deafeninglittlecrown @jumpywhumpywriter

[chronicsymptomsyndrome]

Childhood trauma culture is being grown and still getting really into whatever was popular with kids/teens when you were that age because you feel like you missed out

[femmefatalevibe]

Femme Fatale Playbook: Questions To Ask When Evaluating Your Relationships

Whether it's a friendship, colleague or professional relationship, romantic/sexual relationship, one with a family member, mentors, or with yourself. Here are some questions to ponder when trying to evaluate someone's true character and intentions. Consider the following if you think someone is trying to deceive, manipulate, love bomb, or blindside you in any way.

Do they live with integrity? Not the "I'll start tomorrow" type of integrity, but do they live in alignment with their general life philosophy, opinions, and values?

Do they take accountability for their actions, behaviors, and mistakes? Listen to whether they acknowledge their role in how a situation played out automatically when recounting a story to you. Even when another person is at fault, do they see the situation objectively? Do they play the blame game to make themselves appear like the innocent victim at all times or try to see how their actions may have consequences for others?

When you share your successes with them, is there immediate action to double down on making you feel good or do they automatically claim your win by telling them how it makes them feel or feel about you?

When you make a mistake or share a failure with them, do they seek to understand/offer support, try to distance themselves from your claim/actions, or provide unsolicited advice?

When offering criticism, do they judge your behaviors, attitude, and actions, or do they immediately start evaluating your character?

Do they engage in conversations to win or understand?

Do they make assumptions about your or your perceptions before hearing what you have to say about a particular situation? Do they ask or assume how you're feeling?

In a conflict, do they initiate a conversation by opening a dialogue or immediately jump to criticize you? Do they speak about an issue with you first directly, or do they try to get others on your side behind your back before confronting you?

Are they loyal to you, or do you believe they can "switch sides" at any time? A friend to all is a friend to none.

Do they seek connection or perceive you as a source of consistent attention? Do they ask you how you are or go on endless monologues about themselves/their struggles? When speaking about yourself to them, do they ask questions and seem curious or act dismissive in an attempt to redirect the conversation back to themselves?

Do they put effort into acknowledging your needs, interests, or preferences? Do they do favors or nice things for you that don't necessarily benefit them or relate to their interests, purely because they know you would enjoy it, without having to ask once they know you well?

Do they respect your boundaries? Do they react with understanding and compassion or rage and condescension if they cross them?

Do you feel supported or like you're nagging when expressing your needs to them? Do they value your input or say they do yet dismiss your needs through their actions?

Do they more often say or show that they're a good person? The more someone needs to validate their character, the less likely they've confronted the truth about themselves.