#this is extremely important to me as a polyamorous person

[actuallynickels]

The last few months have been extremely hard and all this has lead to me having to make possibly the most difficult post I’ve ever had to make. Michael and I are no longer together. We both are making our own posts about this so please be sure to read his as well.

About 3-4 months ago Michael started becoming romantically involved (verbally, not physically) with another person and was not honest with me about it. To add important context Michael and I have been polyamorous for the vast majority of our relationship. I have had a second partner for a while who Michael has also been close friends with since well before I started dating them. Michael was of course free to have multiple partners as well, the issue is that he was dishonest and broke my trust.

I didn’t plan on all of this coming out this way, but over the last couple months my trust has continued to be repeatedly broken and I’ve seen little effort on Michael’s part to repair our relationship. I don’t hate Michael or think he’s a bad person. He just has things to work through and he’s starting therapy soon while I have also started therapy for my own struggles.

All of this being said though, Michael and I will still work together. Part of what makes this so hard is that we still love each other very much, but neither of us can make us work. I do not want a single project or friend of ours to treat him any differently. I do not want ANYONE picking sides, as that isn’t what either of us need. We both have a lot of healing to do and that cannot happen without kindness and understanding. I wish nothing but the best for Michael on his healing journey, I just can’t be a part of it anymore.

[aphroditelovesu]

Yandere Tamlin and Rhysand hcs sharing a darling? 👀

❝ 🌹 — lady l: It's three in the morning where I live and here I am... Writing! Do I care? No. Anyway, I hope you like it and forgive me for any mistakes! 💞

❝tw: obsessive and possessive behavior, mention of injuries, unhealthy relationships, polyamorous (sorta of).

❝ ⭐pairing: yandere!tamlin x gn!reader x yandere!rhysand.

They won't share. That simple. There is no way Tamlin and Rhysand would agree to share a darling, let alone a mate. Tamlin is extremely jealous and Rhysand is possessive as hell. Add the fact that their darling is their mate makes it even worse.

Once one realized the other's interest all hell would break loose. It would all really depend on who discovered it first, but at the end of the day, nothing else would matter. Not even you.

Tamlin is the least emotionally unbalanced and this makes him very volatile and dangerous when his temper gets out of control. He is explosive and although he will never knowingly hurt his darling, you still have to walk on eggshells around him. Especially when Tamlin is jealous or furious.

Rhysand is the most rational one in the situation, or at least he tries to be the most rational one, even though he is seething with hatred inside. Rhys might be willing to share his darling with others, but never with Tamlin, his second worst enemy.

A huge fight would begin and if the situation between the two Courts was already bad before, it would become even worse and more volatile. Tamlin wants you at any cost and so does Rhysand, and neither is willing to share.

You would just be a toy caught in a tug of war. They detested each other deeply and their resentment grew more because of you and you would be nothing less than a pawn in a game that has lasted centuries.

They would still try to care about your needs and what you want, but they will both be so blinded by their hatred and possessiveness that you won't be as important. Not when they desperately wanted to destroy themselves.

The only situation I can see them coming to some kind of agreement would be if something happened to you, like if you were a human and almost died or suffered a terrible injury. It would be the only case where Tam and Rhys would work together for you.

Tamlin wants you desperately, he's already so alone and he needs comfort, love and reassurance. He wants to be loved so desperately and his obsession with you has become so unbearable that he can't sleep properly if he doesn't know that you're okay and with him.

Rhysand wants to be loved and have a loving family above all else, he wants this with all his might. He needs you, he needs to smell you and hear you tell him that he loves him. He needs to know that you love him, that he is the only one for you, and that no matter what, you will always choose him.

They will always fight over you, they will never reach a consensus and you are likely to end up broken and none of them will take the blame, as they will be too focused on destroying themselves than on what you need. Rhysand has tried to pay more attention to you, but at the end of the day, it's really about his personal war with Tamlin.

However, at any sign of threat to your life, they will put aside this feud and focus only on you. Even if it doesn't seem like it, they care about you and love you, in a twisted and strange way, but they do and they want to take care of you. Tamlin, especially, due to the fact that he is overprotective.

Rhysand and Tamlin will never come to an agreement, but maybe, as time goes on, they can learn to share you. There will always be bad blood and fights, but perhaps they will realize that the best way to protect you is to come together. Two High Lords can do very well protecting their mate, even if they hate each other deeply.

[emblemxeno]

Sorry king gotta rant. Why does Bernie having trauma mean you can't dislike her? Where's this energy for Rhea, who lost her people and mother? Catherine has good reason to support Rhea since she saved her fucking life but she doesn't get that pass. Dimitri is mentally ill as hell but I don't see Bernie stans defending him? Oh because Bernie didn't hurt anyone else? Okay, what about cyril? The 14 year old boy who was saved from SLAVERY brings up his surrogate mom a lot. Who did he hurt? Why is Bernie's annoying "funny footsteps" ass where the line is drawn? Everyone in 3h has trauma! People can hate whomever they want don't get me wrong but don't act like your favorite traumatized waifu is above criticism while characters like Rhea get dragged through the fucking mud. I guess trauma is only valid if you support the emperor.

Valid feelings imo anon.

I have come and gone on how I feel about Bernadetta, because it's extremely apparent what she was written as: a character whose major gimmick is meant for surface level laughs and entertainment, with a backstory intended to endear her to the audience.

But therein lies many issues I have.

---One support conversation with Byleth, and she says she's fine around them, for no discernable reason according to her. Her entire support chain, including her Goddess Tower scene, is her all but saying "I can't and never could do anything without you professor!" That's a problem 3H has in general because it has no idea how to intentionally write an actual developed relationship. It's why the Lions' intense homoeroticism within its cast, along with Ferdinand and Hubert, are the most common ships outside of Byleth centered ones, as those effectively stumbled into gold.

Comparatively, most other romantic chains-where love/marriage/a relationship was blatantly intended-fall flat because they shove a lot of it into the A supports (sometimes the B rank ones too), which also has to complete the support chain's arc, making one/two conversations tackle two different and delicate topics at once.

I know people are critical of Awakening and especially Fates having romance being hamfisted in the S ranks, but at least you can complete a support chain's story in those games without the shoddy lovey dovey aspect being required reading alongside the conclusion. It's unavoidable in 3H, and also makes many characters look like shitty, emotionally immature people in a meta sense because they can have these near-confessions-of-love with different characters simultaneously due to it being in the A ranks. Not in a cute polyamorous way, either, no just ludicrous.

I digress though, because this affects Bernadetta for me specifically because it's such a rough backstory that it fails to get me to suspend my disbelief that she can suddenly become comfortable with a very speficic stranger to the point of falling for them. Compounding that with a military academy, events, and eventually a war? Yeah, no, it makes no fucking sense.

---Simiarly, as you say, the music that accompanies her supports makes the revelation of her backstory feel insincere and vacuous. Now, I praise similar kinds of writing in games like Engage with Alfred, for example, where learning a very important detail recontextualizes everything you know and have seen about the character. With Alfred, knowing about his illness and losing his father at a young age, it shifts the entire thought process about his supports, story scenes, Firene as a whole, etc.

The difference between him and Bernadetta though, is the sense of respect. Perhaps it's due to Alfred being plot important, but Alfred is written in a way that signals "I, the writer, respect my work, respect the character I'm putting time and effort into, and respect the audience who is consuming it." Alfred has funny music scenes too, but it's never at the cost of making a joke of his trauma. His muscle worship is funny to listen to, his fitness/health regimen is nutty, his overly enthusiastic personality is entertaining, but none of this is at the expense of his vulnerable points. There's hardly, if any, instances of him being forced into changing who he is, altering his beliefs and lifestyle, or being made into a perennial punchline.

Bernadetta, on the other hand, is almost always treated horribly by the support writing. Yelled at by Edelgard, forced out of her room by Ingrid, beat up by a rabbit in Petra's support, accosted by both Ferdinand and Hubert, carried against her will by Caspar, etc. The only supports where I can comfortably say she's treated all right is with Dorothea, Leonie, Raphael, Seteth and Alois, and even then, a couple of those are reliant on a character getting backstory/teachable moment in between her screaming.

It boils down to "Haha, look at this kooky situation that Bernadetta found herself in because of her shut-in personality, what will happen next? 🤪", meanwhile the whole reason why she's like that is because was violently abused by her father and a childhood friend of hers was nearly beaten to death. The backstory itself, doesn't even recontextualize everything the way Alfred's does either, because now all I think when Bernadetta's screaming is "wow, this is fucking gross and potentially triggering for people who also hate having boundaries crossed due to trauma."

And this is the same game that gave us Dimitri's story arc lol. Then again, most of the female characters in 3H have some garbage writing attached to them, soooo...

---This is personal, but I also just can't jibe with Bernadetta conceptually.

Her part one design is okay (aside from the "wow crazy face Bernadetta cuz she's scared haha! 🤪), but her part two design is kinda horrid.

I don't like her voice at all, though that's not an indictment of Erica Mendez at all (she's great as Deirdre and Lianna). It's the direction and character concept, I just hate high pitched squealing and screaming, no matter the voice type, it hits my ears in the worst way.

She's pretty cool as a unit, due to the vengeance builds and having a good spell list if you wanna go a magic route, but... that's about it.

I don't know if I hate Bernadetta herself, or even really dislike her, but I do vehemently hate the concepts behind her and how she's written.

Really, I think people should feel how they feel about whatever character. And I agree, I think it's kinda BS how certain characters are treated worse than others because their personalities are "more annoying/less endearing" despite also being in similar situations.

[missmaymeltsmymind]

You are welcome in this place, but be warned, for dangers lay within...

Well met, friends. You enter the lair of Miss May, hypnotist, writer, and Dominant. I'm the horniest, kinkiest asexual you're ever likely to meet, apart from every other grey-ace I know, I have Extensive Opinions on Many Subjects, there's so many disabilities in this fleshy prison of Mine that it's almost easier to list the ones I don't have, and I am extremely interested in hypnosis for both sexual and non-sexual reasons, on account of the fact that it’s bloody witchcraft. In the (paraphrased) words of Sir Pratchett (GNU): just because you know how it works, doesn’t mean it’s not magic. The fact that it’s unbelievably hot doesn’t hurt, mind.

Age: I'm old enough to remember the idea of online privacy. The only thing you need to know about Me is that I am a legal adult. Fun fact: you can dox someone with their name, age, and hometown really easily. Don't tell the entire goddamned internet your personal information. Lie to corporations, for fuck's sake.

If, for some reason, this irritates you, please answer these questions: what's your name? What about your age? Mh-hm. Noted. And what high school did you go to? In what city or town? Okay, thank you. And, one last one, how many people on the entire planet share that exact same set of answers? Two? Three? None? Yeah. And you've brought this up in casual conversation how many times without thinking about it? On the internet, where literally anyone could find records of it? Protect your damned privacy.

Gender: Good question! Answer in progress. There's definitely more girl in there than I originally thought, but who knows if it's enough to win a majority vote in the pronoun elections. For now, please assume I will respond to most things. She/they is preferred, but I've found that there are specific scenarios in which I respond better to he/him or fae/faer. That said, if you have a new and exciting neopronoun I've never heard of before, please tell Me! I love funky genders. I collect them.

Sexuality: Queer. By specific flags, I'm Asexual (grey), Bisexual Lesbian (women by preference, but if you try to ignore My attraction to men and the Funky Options, I'm swapping your knees with your elbows), Aromantic (maybe?), Transgender (DEFINITELY), Nonbinary, and Polyamorous. Just - just go with Queer. It's so much quicker. I also accept Ace, because 1. It’s definitely the most important individual one, and 2. It makes Me sound like a fighter/mech pilot. Which is very cool. (But not a LAM pilot. Those things suck.)

Asks: Send them! I accept your queries and questions with relish! But be warned, pretty thing, if you approach My lair looking all delicious and vulnerable, I may decide to have a bite...

DMs: I will respond to DMs as soon as I'm able, but generally, I'd rather know you before I speak to you on there, with some exceptions. If you're a friend of a friend, or I'm communicating with you for professional reasons (I'm commissioning art from you, or editing some writing, that sort of thing), then speak freely, but do not be surprised if your message receives no reply. I'm a busy lady, I have many things to do.

My tags, of which there are many:

#Miss May's Magic - Inductions, hypnotic language, and other such things I, Myself, have made. Mantras, indoctrination posts, covert triggers… the list goes on. Abandon free will, all ye who enter here.

#How the Magic is Made: Informational posts about hypnosis. Do bear in mind that I love conversational/covert inductions, please. Enter at your own risk…

#Guard your Mind: Safety talks will go here. I have extensive opinions on this subject. Time will tell if they are revealed to you.

#Someone Else's Spellbook - If I see any ideas from someone else that I consider interesting, admirable, or just really goddamn hot, you'll find them here. Consider this a list of My personal favourites from others.

#Dominance as Joy - I'm a Dom. I'm always a Dom. I refuse to not love being a Dom. This involves some wants and needs considered 'violent' or 'distressing'. I want to degrade, hurt, and manipulate people, consensually, on purpose, for our mutual pleasure. I will not apologise for this. Fight Me. And by me I mean My thralls, because one of them has more muscles in their arm than I do in my entire body, and they can lift my ass up. Which is hot. Hi Dear!

That said, I do absolutely understand that you may not wish to see such things‚ so block this tag at your leisure. You are perusing My blog for your own reasons‚ I do not know them. If this is not to your taste, for whatever reason, I actively encourage you to look away.

#Powerful Playthings - Several of my hottest fantasies involve the unique interplay between submission and hypnosis, particularly the idea of having a switch control others for Me. You will find these ideas here. To be clear, I’m not a switch; I just enjoy a good bit of proxy warfare. Who doesn’t?

#Pretty Little Playthings - If I see any cute little subs being especially delectable and vulnerable, I may just have to comment... This may, of course, be to their detriment. Or their advantage; after all, shouldn't they want to serve Me?

#Thralls at All Times - CnC, constant control, unawareness, the unrelenting devotion to My will, anything that reminds My thralls that I command them at all times is found here. CnC is a personal favourite of Mine.

#Fuckery and Fun: Sometimes you just want to be silly. Hypnosis is an excellent tool for that.

#Kind On Purpose: Hypnosis can also be a tool used for immense kindness. Relaxation, de-stressing, massages with phantom touch, the eradication of fear, gender euphoria, hugs, intimacy, closeness. I choose to be kind on purpose.

#Cognitohazard Warning: Any spirals, swinging pendulums, hypnotic foci of all forms, they’ll be found here. I tend to avoid flashy ones by preference, but My standards may differ from yours, so if you’re at risk of eyestrain or worse, this is the tag to block. They should all be under readmores (and if you notice that one isn’t, please tell Me, I have not yet achieved apotheosis and can as such still make mistakes), but still, if you want to avoid those, block this. Or, if you want to be good for Me, have fun staring~

#Hot Shit - Listen, I may be ace, but people can still be hot. Sometimes. I like boobs. Boobs are good. Mmm, tiddy. Need to grow Me some of those…

#Project Masterwork: This one, my friends, I shall be keeping to Myself. Though, there is one person who might figure it out...

#Transgenderism and Faggotry: The gayest most trans shit imaginable. My ultimate goal is to create a post so transgender that it performs gender-reassignment surgery on everyone who reads it. And also causes Joanne Rowling to explode. Love trans people more than you hate transphobes, though. I'll know if you don't.

To be clear: this tag will be a celebration of queerness, never a challenge, or a discussion of, say, transphobia. While I may well discuss that topic, it will be tagged separately, under Masks Off, most likely. This is for joy, not for sorrow.

#The Gallery: I do love a good piece of Art. And art. Paintings, drawings, pixel art, and everything else, you'll find it here.

#Words Words Words - Should I ever feel the need to talk about my writing on this blog, or just writing in general, you'll find it here. Mostly this will relate to…

#The House of Fun - My kinky hypnotic writing universe. No clue if I'm ever going to talk about it here, but it does exist, and I assure you I am pioneering new and gayer forms of sex with every word I write for it. Also demons. Demons are hot.

#Mind Over Metal - Big robots, cybernetics, and mechs are extremely cool. No further information required. Also, yes, I am a robofucker. I see you, C&H Kalisto. I see that tetsubo. The things I would do to you are not covered by the Utopian Pillars.

#Speak of the Devil - I have a very specific kink for demons. Succubi, Tieflings, anything that carries hell in its heart, spells on its lips, and horns. More of my thralls should have horns, I think. The better for me to use as handles.

#Tally Five - Anything relating to my experiences with asexuality and how that affects my gender, kinkiness, and sexuality will end up here. It's a complex one, to be sure...

#Miss May's Meanderings - At some point, I will inevitably begin rambling about a subject partially or completely unrelated to hypnosis or kink. This will go here. Or I might also ramble about kink! That works too!

#Pinned to the Wall - Personal favourites, for whatever reason. Anything that particularly strikes My fancy can be found here. Note, this most certainly does not mean they're better in some way than the other posts - just that they stick with Me in a way others don't.

#Supplicants Speak to Me - A record of any asks I may receive from others, for good or for ill. Come into my parlour! It ended well enough for the spider‚ didn't it? Be at ease, honoured guest; the only dangers you'll find here are very, very enjoyable. I'm sure you'll agree with me on that... and on a great many other things, too.

#All are Welcome - Disability-related posts, specifically in regards to kink. Everyone is welcome here. Everyone. Regardless of how your bodies and minds may betray you, you deserve to be loved how you desire. This includes Me, too, hard as it is to remember some days...

#Masks Off - This is My 'serious issues' tag. If I'm putting this in play, I'm making a genuine point, going off on a major rant, or otherwise being far more direct and less hypnohorny than this blog normally is. Imagine Me turning off the spiral on-screen and replacing it with diagrams, or the like.

Divine Your Fate - The eagle-eyed amongst you may have noticed that I have something of a divinity kink. I will admit, referring to Myself in capital letters is something of an affectation from this part of Me. This will be one part heretical conversation, two parts acts that would get Me banned from the church I used to go to, and one part lusting over the idea of corrupting the divine to My purposes.

#Remember It My Way - Memory play! Unawareness, memory modification, common sense alterations, long-term brainwashing, the occasional bit of gaslighting, induced forgetfulness... The list goes on. In fact, you're sure there's supposed to be more here... aren't you?

#Mesmerising Magecraft: Hypnosis is literal, actual magic, yes, but sometimes fiction creates more magical magics of magicness, and here shall they be found. Enchantments, spells, magical beings both benign and malevolent; this is the place for them.

[mightymelancholy]

Adding on to a previous post since I feel it's more appropriate to explain here. Warning it gets ranty

I feel a lot of people would miss these "this character is xyz" tweets and live streams. I mean Peridot having little to no sexual/romantic attraction didn't even cross my mind as a young kid or even when I got older. Her being aroace had to be pointed at to me by other YouTubers since I didn't have Twitter (not calling it "X") to see the tweet or the book alluding to her to be aroace. Also because her being aroace wouldn't automatically block off from fusion, since fusion represents varying relationships like toxic relationships, romantic, sexual, polyamorous, monogamous, platonic, and familial relationships. It seems weird to imply Peridot can't have strong platonic and familial fusions just because she's aroace. That's an unfortunate stereotype that the Crewniverse fell into.

Also I won't even get into how Alastor's asexual/aroace identity was vaguely referenced by a joke that was very easy to miss.

Go watch this good video by The Ace Couple

And Octavia hardly contributed to Helluva Boss due to her being overshadowed by her neglectful father that sexually coercived a person with a poor education and a daughter, employees, and himself to financially provide for. I'll keep bringing up how terrible of a character Stolas is any chance I get lol But again a character being ace and or aro is an afterthought even to queer creators, but characters like Angel Dust, Fizz, Blitzø, Ozzie, and Stolas can mention how gay they are. There's nothing inherently wrong with sexual humor it is just that the writers of Hazbin and Helluva think overusing it is funny.

Full Moon was so bad for this 😭 Like making fun of sex toys by having the Cherubs think there torture devices isn't that funny and since they're intentionally or not making fun of people who use them. Like making fun of sex toys and BDSM is hardly funny anymore and really wasn't before at least in the ways some people did it so childishly. The people that participate in those things already get stigmatized enough, why is the show using it as a punchline??

It's just weird and kinda fetishy that the writers depict the prominent gay male characters in the show as extremely sexual people, while asexuals and aromantics can't even mention their orientation. The show uses the word gay or other similar words a good amount of times but only says ace ONCE in Hazbin Hotel that could easily go over someone's head. If people have to go looking for evidence and confirmation outside the show proper then that's not what I'd call good representation. What if platforms get taken down or the posts get removed for whatever reason, then that PROOF of the characters sexuality is gone.

Point is add more characters that are explicitly or heavily implied to be ace and or aro. This shouldn't be hard to make diverse characters important that are also their own person while not ignoring their sexual and romantic orientation. If a character can say they're gay/lesbian/bisexual etc. and like sex with pride, then why can't an ace/aro character.

[criminal-sen]

Ranting about terminally online queers below the cut (tw misgendering and um. Idk I guess transmisandry? Is the word? Or maybe just misandry idfk but there's some terfy man hating is all I'm trying to convey here)

Hsvsgshshwh so my partner, who for the purpose of this post I will admit looks like a big, imposing cis male (they are very much nonbinary and fucking HATE being he/him'd, but it's relevant to point this out) keeps getting into these fucking.. pickles??? with the local queers, specifically those of the transmasc variety? (Well okay that's not quite true, as one was a cis woman whose variety of queerness I can't fn remember rn, and she's undoubtedly, by FAR, caused the most harm in this whole debacle, to the point where i dont even feel comfortable discussing it, and wont, but I digress) and it's varied from person to person, but the constant is that they basically meet my partner on whatever fuckin dating platform, IMMEDIATELY mark them as 'dangerous and potentially predatory man', yet this marking is seemingly *just* far back enough in their subconscious that they engage in anything from.. flirty/sexual msging with them, all the way to actual physical hookups

and then, in HINDSIGHT, long after the fact, decide that their consent has been breached in some nebulous way and they've been harmed??? And this would be one thing if they were going to my partner and saying this, but no they're going around saying it everywhere else!

And let me be perfectly fucking clear: consent and boundaries are very important things! And to feel like those have been encroached upon feels shitty! But when you're talking about shit so fucking TEPID and IN YOUR HEAD as 'we were having a discussion via text about BDSM and after we were done, I felt icky, so I'm going to tell ppl I was harmed' then guess what! The only harm that's being done here is to my partner, by spreading around your stupid, EXTREMELY online understanding of what these terms are and why they exist in the first place

Like I know my partner pretty well at this point. And I know they're 1) always sober, at least from substances like booze that might cause one to be overly flirty and miss cues. Like they literally jist smoke weed avshsbdv and 2) extremely read-up on current language/discussion around How To Behave within the queer community, and yes this includes COPIOUS checking of the other person's mental state and whether they're still into whatever is being done

Like the only thing they're 'doing wrong' in the eyes of the ppl saying this shit is looking like a spooky scary cis man. Which they're not. But they can't fucking help how they look, especially when they're over 6 ft tall and fucking bald:/

And like. All of this is super frustrating to hear about, like it just keeps HAPPENING. And the part of me that's salty about the polyamorous nature of our relationship (not from a jealousy standpoint per say its just. a whole can of very insecure worms) wants to tell them, with all my heart, that maybe they should stop fucking around with Sensitive Queers they've barely (if at all) even met. And jist keep it in their fuckin pants for fucks sake, at least until they know the person on even the barest level. Because some of these ppl are fucking tar pits, I'm sorry. And the t4t hookup scene in this city reeks of terminally online AND small town bullshit, and they're already getting a very quiet but definitely non-zero Reputation. Like I can't even tell my transmasc group (who I finally met in person the other day btw) who I'm dating bc they're the ones doing this shit like oh my fucking god how Exhausting

But that's not a suggestion that can come from my mouth without sounding um. very shitty. so I make a post about it instead:)

[out-of-the-forest-i-come]

Running Close to the Wind Review

Running Close to the Wind comes out June 11th in the US, and June 13th in the UK, so make sure to preorder it or mark the date, because it's a gem of a book.

Pirates but make it gay and absolutely unhinged. Then take that, and make it horny and polyamorous. Congratulations, you now have Running Close to the Wind.

Avra, lucky poet and partially retired spy for Arast, accidentally stole the one trade secret most of Arast’s fortune is based on. He also accidentally reunited with Captain Tevari, a pirate with a ruthless reputation and his on-again off-again ex of the past fifteen years, who may or may not want him dead, or at the very least as far away from them as possible. To keep himself from being thrown overboard, Avra reveals to Teveri and their crew the secret he’s stolen, and together they devise a plan to sell it and make as much money off it as possible. Enters Julian, an extremely attractive monk bound by an unfortunate vow of celibacy, scholar extraordinaire and last essential piece to help them achieve their plan. Avra now has three problems on his hands: finding a way to sell the secret without being found out and killed by Arast, make up with Teveri, and convince Julian to abandon his vow of celibacy.

Forget everything you’ve just imagined about this book, forget the comparisons to Our Flag Means Death and Six of Crows, however accurate they may be, because whatever your expectations are about this book, it will blow them away. I went in with high expectations, both because of the promise of a heist like in Six of Crows, one of my favourite books ever, and because I loved A Taste of Iron and Gold, the first and only Alexandra Rowland book I’d read. Despite this, nothing had prepared me for the wild, unhinged ride that Running Close to the Wind proved to be.

Alexandra Rowland introduces us to fiery, vivid characters, whose personalities both clash and compliment one another’s. Avra could be an obnoxious and annoying character, what with his exuberant personality and endless supply of dirty jokes, but instead I found him most endearing, and it was incredibly easy to empathise with him and long for his happy ending. Similarly, Teveri’s personality could have driven me away. Instead, and partly thanks to Avra’s adoration of them, they were so easily lovable and relatable. And Julian’s wit and daunting complimented this pair so well, bringing nuance while playing into their games. This made for delicious relationships, and dynamics that had me cackling and squealing, and made me yearn for more development of their relationship, yearn to know what would happen and how it would end. From a writer’s point of view, I am admirative of Alexandra Rowland’s well-proven ability to play with a variety of characters and personalities, and render them all equally vivid and compelling, and to make readers fall for all kinds of relationships, from the calm one in A Taste of Gold and Iron to the fiery one in Running Close to the Wind.

Another thing I loved and admired was the balance between plot and character arc. This story is cleary character-led and the point of it is not so much what happens to the secret, although it is an important part of the story, as what growth the characters undergo. And grow they do. These arcs were mastered from start to end, and Alexandra Rowland found just how much of character arc and how much plot they could give us so that the story would neither feel plot-heavy nor character-heavy. This is no easy feat, but Alexandra Rowland mastered it seamlessly, and it merits some applause.

Overall, Running Close to the Wind is like no other book I’ve ever had to pleasure to read. It is wild and hilarious, and I don’t remember the last time a book made me laugh so much, but I’ll definitely remember that time. This story reads well and quickly, the worldbuilding blending it perfectly with the rest, even for those who haven’t read or don’t remember much about the worldbuilding of A Taste of Gold and Iron, set in the same world. Running Close to the Wind is a masterpiece of a story, lighthearted and yet treating serious topics without weighing down the atmosphere of the book. It is endlessly fun, surprisingly crude and dirty in its jokes, and vivid from beginning to end. Those who have loved Freya Marske’s books will most likely love this book as well, as will Alexandra Rowland’s fans and anyone interested in queer pirates. If you dislike sex-related jokes or crude language, refrain from reading this book, as it is riddled with such jokes and language—and it is what makes part of its charm.

Thank you Pan Macmillan and NetGalley for provinding me with an ARC of this book. All opinions in this review are mine and unbiased.

[getvalentined]

12-15 for Valenstrifesodos! :D

12. What they do for their anniversary:

It takes them a while to figure out what the date of their anniversary even is, given that the process of them getting together was a bit complicated and it's hard to say exactly when it segued from platonic to romantic to polyamorous between the three of them. Once they all agree on a date, their anniversary is usually a small affair wherein they all take a day off and go do something together, often away from the public. They go sightseeing, hiking, spelunking, swimming—activities centric on experiencing things together, making memories rather than focusing on gifts or anything material. In the end, memories are all at least one of them is going to have, so this is really important.

13. Who makes a bigger deal of birthdays:

Genesis. Cloud is terrible at remembering dates and doesn't have strong feelings about birthdays either way, so he doesn't really care. Vincent would avoid acknowledging them altogether if he could; other people's birthdays are like a running tally until those people outgrow him or die, and celebrating his own is a bad joke considering he's always going to be twenty-seven.

For Genesis, birthdays are a chance to express to the people he loves how glad he is that they exist. He doesn't celebrate landmark ages—although in the far future he's the one that actually remembers Vincent's exact age, and knows what Cloud's would be if he were still alive—but rather the very fact that they were born in the first place. That's a mindset that even Vincent can eventually accept, although it doesn't help Cloud remember dates any better.

14. What nicknames they call each other:

Vincent doesn't really use nicknames. He'll use diminutive forms of a person's actual name, but that's different. Genesis is "Gen" a portion of the time, and "Rhapsodos" when he's being insufferable. In the far future as they both cycle through a rather excessive number of fake names to keep from drawing attention, Vincent will sometimes use any of the names he remembers to refer to Genesis, who responds in kind. (They tend to lean into the more ridiculous ones, leading Vincent to occasionally refer to Genesis affectionately as "Dr. Rothosis," to which Genesis will respond by calling him "Professor Ventfort" in a bad Old Junonese accent.)

Cloud is much the same as Vincent, although he takes even longer to do it. Vincent has been "Vince" since about halfway through the Crisis, sure, but Genesis isn't "Gen" until they've been living together for two years. He does eventually refer to Genesis on rare occasions as just "bird" or "feathers," much to Genesis' absolute delight. (He also sometimes calls him "wingding" but that's less appreciated.)

Genesis, though. Hoo-boy. "Love" is a big one, and he uses it indiscriminately for both Cloud and Vincent, alongside "darling." Cloud is also "pretty savior," "little wolf," and occasionally "my sunlit hurricane." Vincent is "blackbird," "heartsong" and (much more rarely) "my eternal midnight companion." He'll also use long one-off poetic titles here and there, less nicknames or petnames so much as dramatic descriptions that suit the situation in one way or another. He occasionally refers to Cloud and Vincent together as "the champion and the apocalypse," but in a very tongue-in-cheek way as if teasing someone by using their middle name. (Example: "If the champion and the apocalypse would condescend to bless me with their presence, dinner will be ready in less than ten minutes and no one has set the table." Vincent is the only one of them with a middle name, so this is a fair alternative.)

15. What they would change about each other:

If they could change anything, they would all unanimously make each other match with regard to lifespan, aging and mutation.

Cloud is mortal, ages at an extremely slow rate but does still age, may experience further mutation later in life but thankfully only in a way that will absolutely be concealable (if Cloud ever gets a wing he will be able to put it away the same as Genesis) and destructible. He'll live a long time, may change a little bit but will still have the capacity to look human, but he can be killed and someday he's going to die.

Genesis is immortal, doesn't age, will not experience any further mutations over time, but is probably still as destructible as his predecessors in the Planet's service—the first generation of Weapons that Avalanche fought during the Crisis. He'll live forever, he'll be more or less the same (physically) that entire time, but he can probably be killed in the right circumstances.

Vincent is immortal*, doesn't age, will experience further mutations over time as his human characteristics are overtaken and overwritten by the Weapon Lucrecia turned him into, and he's indestructible. He'll live forever, look less and less human as ages pass until no one would ever mistake him as such, and he can't be killed no matter how anyone or anything might try.

(*Vincent is still in possession of the immortality and powers afforded to him by Chaos even post-Dirge; it's Chaos' consciousness that returned to the Lifestream, relinquishing control of Vincent's body for good. We know this because Vincent was indicated to have been all but atomized stopping Omega from leaving, possibly even burning up on reentry like space debris, but eventually whatever was left of him recombined and remanifested in the cave where Chaos once slept, whole and complete and himself. Further, the OG ends with Nanaki making his way to Midgar 500 years post-Meteorfall, which we know is something he does yearly for the express purpose of meeting up with Vincent.)

If the three of them could change anything, it would be to make it so they were all the same in this capacity—whatever that might look like—so they wouldn't be inevitably separated. Unfortunately, that's never been in the cards.

(For the ship asks game.)

[luxlitemidnight]

Intro Post v.3

Hello! We are Fluffy, and welcome to our blog!

We are a created system (catharigenic & tulpamancy)* known as the Fluffy Crew. Our collective pronouns are they/them. We are a 22 year old adult bodily.

*(New to systems and plurality/multiplicity? Here's a primer: https://morethanone.info/)

You can find more details on us at our pronouns.cc, which will have the most up-to-date list of headmates and information about them.

This blog will mostly be talking about our day-to-day life, as well as reblogging things I like or want to share with my followers. I do my best to tag any potentially triggering content because I know you're all traumatized ♥️. We are extremely non-judgemental and I believe the best way to grow as a person is to be open to new perspectives. That being said, I will call you out on your bullshit.

I am polyamorous and have two partner systems that I live with. I will refer to them as my girlfriend and boyfriend. I am not open to online relationships.

This blog's only DNI is donation blogs. Any donation asks, comments, or other will be deleted and your blog will be blocked.

Interests

Long term/overarching interests: Psychology, video games, technology, engineering

Current interests: plurality (current hyperfixation), tulpamancy, DID/OSDD, video games (Outer Wilds, RimWorld, and IWATEX to name a few), general learning, ceramics, alterhumanity

My sideblogs

@created-system-hub - Created plurality sideblog

@sanctumfilth - NSFT/erotic sideblog (enter at your own risk)

@spain-exline-linden-runesworth - Sims sideblog

Important Links

Coining Anymic - alterhuman term

Important Tags

#[name]'s post - a post that is by or about a certain headmate. Usually used as a signoff on original posts.

#suggestive - mentions sex or sexual topics but is not NSFT. Block if sex is triggering for you.

#us politics - mentions the current political state of the US. I live in Iowa, so I will talk about my own country.

Our content warning tags will follow the "#cw [thing]" format. If you need to me tag something for you, please drop an ask.

Labels & Stances

We are: endogenic, tulpamancy system, alterhuman (therian, otherkin, extranth), bodily adult, queer, polyamorous, transmasculine nonbinary, a-spec, (professionally diagnosed) ADHD, (self diagnosed) autistic, (medically recognized) anxiety and depression

Our beliefs: endo safe, anti-censorship, pro contradictory labels, rad inclus, pro radical bodily autonomy, anti-contact, pro paraphile, nuance radqueer/transID (this blog is safe for you to interact with and I do not hate you as a person but I do not agree with nor want to interact with your community). Anything not mentioned we are neutral on.

[coochiequeens]

Another male using his position in TRA organizations to abuse minors. Odd that it's yet another example since "that's just bigoted fear mongering and never actually happens"

By Marielena Meder January 14, 2025

A Swiss LGBT activist has quietly launched a new “family counseling” practice while under investigation for offenses related to sexually exploiting minors at the Queer youth charity he co-founded with his husband.

In 2024, Swiss prosecutors opened an investigation into a gay couple for alleged abuses they committed while operating the Sozialwerk.LGBT+ group, a “safe space” for “queer youth.” While their identities were initially withheld by the Swiss press, Reduxx quickly identified the men as being Holger Niggemann and his husband, Björn Niggemann.

The Niggemanns co-founded the organization, receiving financial support from local governments, the city of Chur, and various non-profit foundations to work with children as young as 13.

Last April, local media interviewed fifteen individuals who had come into contact with the Niggemann’s through Sozialwerk.LGBT+, but the vast majority opted for anonymity, citing fears of being threatened or pursued by the couple.

Holger, 42, is alleged to have had sexual contact with two 17-year-olds who had sought help for bullying with his organization. Holger was a board member of the group at the time, while his husband Björn was the business manager. The two men are said to have had a three-way sexual relationship with one of the teens, a 17-year old boy, according to a report by Tages-Anzeiger.

According to statements from the teenage victim, he moved in with the married couple while he was still a minor. Distressed at what was reportedly an abusive situation, the 17-year-old wrote on social media that he was in a “a toxic, polyamorous relationship, and it’s tearing me apart.” He also communicated that “when this is over, I’ll have to get my brain fixed. I can’t take it anymore. I will end it.”

Numerous documents are said to substantiate what happened in the group, including text messages, emails and voice messages, reports Tages-Anzeiger. Other board members of Sozialwerk.LGBT+ also came forward to speak to press and confirm their knowledge of what had been happening.

Daniel Huber, a former board member of the association, reported the couple to public prosecutor Annina Grob, and made a statement to media condemning the Niggemanns for their behavior towards the vulnerable youth in their care.

A box filled with BDSM equipment and sex toys was kept at the youth center in Chur. Photo: Tages-Anzeiger

“For us, the behavior of the two is a total abuse of power, and the young people also felt that way. I brought it up again and again,” said Huber, who attended the meetings as a teenager before joining the board in a leadership role. “It is important not to look away from such behavior.”

According to former board members who spoke to press, the Niggemann’s sexual relationship with the boy also led to heated discussions within the organization.

“That this relationship was completely inappropriate from both a professional and moral standpoint was clear to everyone. But one of them could [argue] extremely well. I suddenly felt very conservative for opposing it,” one person said, alleging that one of the Niggemann’s had emotionally or politically manipulated other members of the organization into staying silent about the sexual impropriety.

As the discussions among the board members became increasingly heated, Holger and Björn sent long text messages to colleagues, aiming to justify their behavior.

“In public child and youth work, it was common for a long time for youth workers to have sexual contact with young people,” one of the Niggemann’s reportedly claimed. “In Berlin, street children were placed with pedophilic offenders until the 1990s because only these people could love children,” he went on to say, referring to the Kentler Project in Germany, an experiment which placed foster children into the homes of pedophiles.

Sexuality was apparently a recurring theme in Holger’s approach to youth work. Several individuals report that Sozialwerk.LGBT+ had a “sexualized atmosphere” despite catering to children. The Niggemann’s reportedly often offered teenagers a box full of sex toys like dildos, leather straps, bondage gear, whips, or anal plugs.

Following the allegations of child sexual abuse with pending legal proceedings against Holger and Björn, Sozialwerk.LGBT+ dissolved. “Given the circumstances, the youth center (…) can no longer function as a safe space for young people,” declared the then-chairwoman, Viktoriya Schiefer.

Prior to the 2024 revelations, Holger’s other organization, treffLGBT+, had already been facing criticism for instructing youth to use terms like “fuck holes” and “front holes” for vaginas, to emphasize “intended function.”

Despite the ongoing investigation, Reduxx has now learned that Holger has launched his own office  focused on family and sexual counseling in Buchs.

Holger Niggemann. Photo: holgerniggemann.ch

On his website, Holger specifies that he should be referred to using the pronouns “sier,” denoting his non-binary identity, and underscores that counseling children and adolescents on partnerships and sexuality has always been a key focus for him.

While Holger has refused to comment on his new venture to Tages-Anzeiger, his attorney has confirmed that he is legally permitted to establish and operate his office, where he also offers family counseling. The fee for a 90-minute session ranges from 100 to 150 Swiss Francs (approximately 100 to 160 US dollars).

In December of 2024, Reduxx received a notice from the attorney representing the Niggemanns demanding the deletion or significant amendment of our April 2024 article on the case, stating that a civil suit or criminal charges would be pursued unless we complied. We have not.

The alleged incidents at Sozialwerk.LGBT+ is not the first instance where an organization focused on “LGBT+ youth” has been accused of enabling the abuse of vulnerable adolescents. As previously reported by Reduxx, two men from Scotland reported that they were groomed and sexually exploited as minors while utilizing services provided by LGBT Youth Scotland.

LGBT Youth Scotland, originally known as the Stonewall Youth Project, is recognized as Scotland’s national charity dedicated to “LGBTI young people.” It engages with individuals aged 13 to 25, offering programs in schools, organizations, and businesses.

The charity was established in 1989 and rebranded in 2003, coinciding with the appointment of James Rennie as CEO, who was convicted and sentenced to lifelong restrictions in 2009 for running what was labeled as Scotland’s “largest pedophile network.”

[cutechubbygamerdemons]

Just a quick coming out!

I have quite a few labels that I absolutely love but here’s the most important few~

First of all is DemiAegoFlux, where I fluctuate between demisexual and aegosexual. I made the flag myself and mixed the terms myself.

Second is hyperromantic, because, well, I’m hyper romantic

Flag made by damien//aeon (https://caninophobia.tumblr.com/)

I’m extremely neurodivergent and tend to be hyperromantic because of it, so it’s less of something I identify with and more of a “I am/have this” because it’s a disorder

Next is polyamorous! I am poly, the main reason being my hyperromantic tendencies

Almondsexual and almondromantic! Personally my favorite~

I. Love. Men. Anyone nb or masc aligned I love. Sometimes I’ll be attracted to a woman but they tend to be fictional women.

Next is my plural identity

I’m just putting the mixed origin flag because of how many labels suit me in this category. There’s tulpagenic, willogenic, endogenic, traumagenic, and more. Personally I started as tulpagenic

My neurodivergensies! Hehe, that’s a fun word~

AuDHD (Autistic and ADHD) OCD and generalized anxiety! Hah! What a mouthful!

My next post will be my pronouns and Xenogenders!

(https://beyond-mogai-pride-flags.tumblr.com/) for the anxiety flags

Also, could anyone help me with a ballsona? Like a base or what each accessory means? Thanks!

HAVE A GREAT DAY!

[sugarships]

hi my name is kandi/kodi/addi !! im 23 and my pronouns are they/he/neos !!

my f/o list is here and i'm always okay with sharing!! i would love love love any selfship mutuals so don't be afraid to interact !! <3 <3 <3

i'm a silly australian audhd polyamorous fictoqueer clown dog and my f/os are so extremely important to me!!

i follow from @kandigored and i never like posts, only reblog! also here's my selfship strawpage!

↓ tags + other important info below ↓

main tags:

#sweet talks 💕 -my (non art) posts

#kandi arts 🍨 -my art

#letterbox 💌 -asks

#[f/o name] 💘 -romantic f/o

#[f/o name] 💟 -crushes

#[f/o name] 💞 -queerplatonic f/o

#[f/o name] 💖 -platonic f/o

#[f/o name] 💝 -familial f/o

#♥️ [ship name] ♥️ -selfship tag

#[s/i name] 🍬 -self inserts

#shipping wall 💗 -other peoples ships

#other shippers 💗 -other peoples s/is

dni kind of i feel like these don't rlly work but this is not a safe place for

-adults that ship with minors (regardless of aging up/down)

-people who ship with r*pist, p*dophilic, or general child abusing characters

-pr/oship + da/rkship (i don't wanna see that shit)

-racists, transphobes, homophobes, ablests, any other type of bigot

-people into rpf?? whatever the word is also if you selfship with real people

also important

-while this blog is sfw i don't interact with minors, i don't mind likes or reblogs but i won't interact in return for my own comfort

-some of my f/os are from controversial media, this does not mean i condone nor support the actions of the creators and i am critical of all media i consume!!

-i only really block if it's a personal issue or persistent unwanted interaction, otherwise i just ignore because i'm too tired

[immobiliter]

ship bias for drummer & martha !

ship bias meme / @galaxye

camina drummer !

okay so no. 1 has to be camina & her polyambelterfam - this is her one canon romantic "pairing" and it's just handled so wonderfully by the writers and gives camina so much interesting development from s5 onwards. i'm not sure if i'd say i'm the biggest fan of the way her and oksana's relationship turned out, at least in terms of her specific dynamics with the other main crew members of the dewalt, but i do like what that dynamic achieves for camina's characterisation in addressing that she has so much anger and trauma to overcome in order to accept love from others. it's just so nice to see polyamorous relationships depicted on screen too.

i also have to give a mention to camina & naomi lmao. it should have been canon. they did polyamory with camina and her crew, so it would have been easy to accomplish with naomi & holden too. i'm not sure i necessarily ship camina with holden, i think in an ot3 situation it would have to be a dynamic with naomi at the centre ( as she deserves ), a little like how the writers pitched it during the latter half of s3, but i think they are both incredibly important parts of naomi's life and she deserves to have them both tbh.

then speaking exclusively about the telltale game, i absolutely ship camina & maya. they did everything right when it came to maya ( and one day i'll replay the game so that i can actually save her because rip, that hurt my soul ), camina canonically falls for/chooses to orbit around visionaries and idealists and i think it makes a lot of sense for her to have an early romantic relationship with someone like maya to help inform the sort of preferences she has during the show timeline.

those are my only canon pairings for camina, i think she is way too sharp and savvy for any of the men she spends her time around ( i just can't picture it with dawes, fred or ashford ). but i will always ship her with happiness + people who can look past her scary, tough exterior and appreciate the heart of gold that she has hiding underneath.

martha jones !

so can i preface this by talking about what i absolutely do not, under any circumstances, ship ? martha and ten lmaoooo. no thank you no way. don't get me wrong, i looove ten, he is my favourite doctor and i have so much nostalgia attached to david's run as the doctor, but i have Opinions about him where martha is concerned and frankly would like her to stay away. i do think their dynamic is interesting for very specific reasons, but the further i can pull martha away from her unrequited love plot, the better imo. i'd be even happier if i can just pretend it never existed in the first place. i think this also rules out shipping martha with any other iteration of the doctor too, i'm just Not Interested in really going there, y'know? i prefer doctor who when it's not all about the romantic tension.

martha & mickey is an interesting one. it's the way that martha's story canonically ends and i'm extremely ambivalent about it, probably because we are given absolutely Nothing and no reason to really care about the fact that they are together aside from a quick scene during david's last episode. do i think they could be a good fit ? yes, definitely, do i like that they shafted tom milligan ? nope, not at all lmao. so it's not something i would auto-ship but i absolutely could ship it with the right person, they both have similar experiences of being shafted and dismissed repeatedly by others and both had to prove themselves, so i think on paper it could work really well and i would one day love to explore it.

martha & jack. again, i wouldn't auto-ship it, but i have shipped it in the past and i do love the idea of them together under specific circumstances. do i necessarily think it could work out long term ? i'm on the fence, i'm not sure jack could give martha what she ultimately Needs ( stability, love, a safe home to come back to ) long term. however i love how protective jack is of her throughout both dw and tw and it's obvious that he really really cares about her and her family. and martha is flirtatious, this is a canon fact. so i find it difficult to believe something wouldn't happen between the two of them at some point, however fleeting it was. i think they could learn a lot from each other.

also a quick shoutout to martha & jason ( @synchronzed ) because i always have to credit rat for writing spectacular ships with me and this is one i'm really excited about. martha deserves a silly boy who simps for her, that is all.

and lastly, martha & happiness is up there too. the girl deserves someone who think she is a goddess among mortals because she is and i will not accept anything less for a queen like her. she takes care of everyone around her and it's only right that she has someone who will take care of her in return. i also hc her as bi, so this needn't be restricted to just boys too. i think her dynamic with miranda raison's character in dw ( the showgirl from the 30s ) is super interesting when looked at through that sort of lens.

[rowanoftheunknown]

You can be mad about lupete of course but the interpretation of them being poly was almost fully a fanon idea. Saying we don't own each other is something I'd say about my own partner (and were monogamous). That said- them being married doesn't stop them from being poly at all.

First of all, I would say that it was not a fanon idea, it was pretty explicit in season one and the fact that it is treated so casually is what maybe makes it less noticeable to non polyamorous people and what makes it so important to me.

Secondly, I'm not trying to imply that you can't get married as a poly person. Very "how dare you say we piss on the poor" energy. I'm saying that in the show marriage is brought up to show people being trapped, in heteronormativity, in relationships, in societal expectations and constructs. I personally believe that it would have been great to see a couple who love each other unconditionally without having to have them get married and I think it does a disservice to the themes that have been set up. Marriage is a social contract that is fundamentally about ownership, whether that's what it means to you is kind of immaterial because that is what it means both literally and in this case, thematically.

Finally. I love lupete. I'm not mad about them, I'm extremely happy about them, I'm so glad they're back together, they are a set you cannot separate them etc. I thought that the proposal was out of left field and honestly a little out of character and I thought it was weird that nobody else was seeing it. Lots of people are saying they disagree and honestly slay let those boys have their wedding they deserve a day off

[aceing-on-the-cake]

I do not have what anyone could describe as a societally normal take on relationship dynamics. I am arospec, aspec, and polyamorous. The way I am inherently going to look at and define relationships, is automatically going to be different than the vast majority of people because of those three factors all interworking together.

Which means that even when I'm engaging in a statistically normal relationship dynamic, such as monogamy, the way in which I engage in monogamy is going to be extremely different than the way most other people engage in monogamy. Because like monogamy is an action, it is a relationship structure that you can choose to use or not use, and in the same way an asexual person can choose to have sex with someone regardless of their asctual attraction, me engaging in monogamy is not going to change the way in which I perceive the world and relationship dynamics as a whole.

So a lot of my ideals, or even simple things like what my boundaries are within a monogamous relationship for my other partner, are very different from their ideals and instinctive boundaries. Which that's not a problem, I am in a monogamous relationship because I don't mind engaging in that relationship structure with the person I'm engaging it in with, but that is not my automatic instinctive need or even want.

So like when it comes to things like what is cheating to you conversations, such as what kind of physical contact do you consider to be crossing lines with other people, looks incredibly different for me than it does for my partner. It's always going to look different, because my bar is always going to be "if the other person knows who I am and my place in your life, you're not making me less important in your life, and you're letting me know the very basics of the things you're engaging in (I'm literally talking all they'd have to mention is they want to sleep with another person, they want to go on a date with this other person, they want to cuddle pretty frequently with this other person, etc), then I'm fine."

And it's ok that my partner's list is longer. It's ok that they have a longer list of types of physical contact they are and are not ok with me engaging in with other people (i.e. kissing, cuddling in a bed specifically, etc), because again, I am choosing to participate in a monogamous relationship structure with this individual because I enjoy their company more than the prospect of engaging in polyamory in general.

But it's important to know that I am still a polyamorous person regardless of the relationship structure I choose to be in, the same way a bisexual person is still bisexual, no matter who they choose to be in a relationship with.

Actions, do not define your queerness, or define the way you view society, or define how you view cishetero/amatonormative ideals. They never will.

[itsmymeaningoflife]

If you're still interested in answers to your twd shipping post, I just finished the series :D Feel free to ignore, this got really long.

(And just a heads up, any time I say "Daryl is..." I mean that I hc him that way. Just so it doesn't come across that I'm arguing that anything I say is canon or not. xD)

I'm a donnie/conyl shipper and I am totally pleased with the state of Daryl's relationships by the end. Daryl is someone who takes his time comfortably letting people into his heart. The pace he and Connie are moving felt good to me! While the self-indulgent part of me would have loved more for them (at least Connie also seeing him off or slightly more physical affection), I didn't need a fully established relationship between them yet. I see it as something that is there, but still blossoming as they're also navigating their way through own personal paths in life.

It took 10+ years for him to tell Carol he loved her and she is an extremely important person to him. I don't think it's weird if he and Connie aren't quite there yet.

That, and I personally hc Daryl as not a very romantic person in general. I don't think he's going to be super mushy or deep kiss in public. He's not one to long for candle lit dinners or walks on the beach, ahaha. This also goes had in hand with my hc that's there's some gray romantic/sexual or demi romantic/sexual thing going on with Daryl. I hc the way he feels, expresses, and engages with people relationship-wise is pretty different from mainstream folks.

(So when I'm in the mood, I literally feel comfortable hc'ing that he and Connie ARE together in the epilogue scene and they just didn't express their reunion with any big grand gesture because they draw most of their joy from casual physical affection and simply being around each other.)

The other complicated half of the answer is that I also see Daryl and Carol as sort of... platonic life partners? So to me, they kind of ARE together, just not in the traditional romantic and/or sexual way? Whereas I enjoy Daryl and Connie having a bit more of that romantic interest in each other.

And as someone who connects very strongly to deep, intimate, polyamorous/non-monogamous relationships, I have no problem shipping Carol with Ezekiel romantically, Daryl with Connie romantically, and then Daryl and Carol in an equally important but different dynamic relationship that includes this true, deep, powerful platonic love.

And media almost never gives us relationships like Daryl and Carol that are platonic, so I just adore them that way. It's so satisfying for me seeing a man and a woman so close who aren't romantically involved. I LOVE PLATONIC 'I LOVE YOU'S THEY MAKE ME SO HAPPY.

TWD often comments on not being restricted by how the old world expected life to work, and I think that can go for relationships too. The dynamic that Daryl and Connie and Carol and whoever else have don't have to fall in neat little boxes they way society used to dictate. I love it being fluid and open and comfortable without a need for jealousy or labels.

And this is only the tip of the iceberg for me when it comes to talking about these guys, but I'm trying to keep it concise as possible. xD

So, I think your post was asking about what less ideal state shippers prefer, but personally, I don't feel I like lost anything. Who knows what's to come with the spin off, but as of the twd finale right now, I don't feel like they ditched or abandoned Daryl and Connie and I wouldn't give up Daryl and Carol's friendship for the WORLD. They're both super important to me. :D

And I left behind ship wars back when I was 13, so no matter what does happen in the new spin-off, I'm going to be in my happy little twd bubble off to the side shipping these characters in the way that brings me the most joy.

While I’m not really engaging with this part of the fandom (‘shipping wars’) anymore since the show has ended, I think that this is a really interesting take and I’m very grateful you took the time in writing out this ask, thank you.

You make some very interesting points. The one thing I absolutely agree on is the asexual Daryl hc. I’ve always been a big big big supporter of asexual Daryl.

I’m glad you’ve watvhed this show tho, and I’m glad that you, a donnie shipper, can also appreciate the profoundly deep connection between Daryl and Carol. A lot (not all, but a good chunk) of donnie shippers like to diminish their bond in favour of their ship. So thank you for that.

But one thing I will have to “call you out” on (I’m sorry for the phrasing I really don’t mean it in a harsh way hahah) is the “Daryl isnt one to long for candle lit dinners” line… because this

is a very treasured moment in the Caryl fandom. Daryl being the only person Carol let in (both physically and emotionally) after she pulled away from the group, and Daryl asking “if [he] has to be a king to get some food around here” is such a beautiful scene.

That and in s11 he asks Carol to meet him for lunch, and when Carol suggests the diner, he tells her “it’s a date” … so like… he does, and has been involved in asking people (Carol) on dinner dates

I will post this ask as I think people will want to see this take and maybe chime in on some points better than I can.

To anyone replying to this person- be kind and be respectful. I’ll be monitoring comments and anyone being hateful will be removed. It will not be tolerated. People can have opposing opinions and still have respectful discussions about it.