#society is a dick

[ineffectualdemon]

[catpriciousmarjara]

Getting a PHD literally anywhere else: Wow! Congratulations! What a great achievement! Amazing!

Getting a PHD in Gotham: Wow! Amazing! You're now on several Government, Civilian, and Bat watchlists.

So if any of the Wayne kids get a PHD, then the entirety of Gotham would be squinting at them suspiciously. They're rich, so resources, and most likely already insane with all the shit they pull.

What I'm saying is if Jason went and got himself a Doctorate in Literature, the whole city would anticipate the appearance of his villainsona called the Dead Poet(emphasis on the dead) or Bookkeeper or something else similarly nerdy and themed like that for sure.

I just know that it would turn into some Gotham inside joke with memes abound, and everytime Jason would, I don't know, give more funding to the neglected Arts Departments in Gotham University, or go to a school for read alongs to encourage kids to read, Gotham social media would go crazy and be like:

"The Dreaded Villain Dead Poet Reads Alice in Wonderland to Children! How Despicable!"

"Villain Dead Poet Lambasts Government on Banning Books! Leads Librarians to Riot!"

"Dead Poet Ramps up his Villainy by Establishing Educational Programmes in Crime Alley! Uplifting the Poor! What a Dastardly Villain!"

"Dead Poet Goes on Live Ranting About his Favourite Books! Favourite Author is Jane Austen! Is this the Feminist Agenda?"

And so on! It's a meme that refuses to go away. His siblings actively participate, and make the situation worse.

Dick held an online Gotham Villains and Anti-Heroes Poll and Dead Poet came out on top, over Red Hood. Jason is an actual Gotham crime boss, but his crowdfunded villainsona is more popular. No he's not salty about it at all.

Duke would create a montage of Dead Poet sightings.

Stephanie would make a Dead Poet meme compilation.

Tim would arrange Wayne Enterprises to donate to local libraries after allegedly being threatened by the heinous villain Dead Poet. (Jason did ask Tim to do that but not like that)

Barbara created an extremely popular Villain Watch account for Dead Poet.

Cass tweeted out Jason's favourite books as the villain Dead Poets reading list telling people to avoid them 'wink wonk', causing a massive uptick in the sale of those books ala Bigolas Dickolas.

Damian of all people tweeted out a pic of Jason playing with Alfred the cat accusing the evil villain Dead Poet of attempting to kidnap his cat.

And thats not to mention all the shenanigans they pull in their batsonas.

God bless Gotham and it's home grown, organic, not even remotely ethically sourced, free range chaos.

[earth-and-alert]

The fact that women are needing to run a whole movement of women empowerment just to prove that we are just another gender of HUMANS and wish to be treated like them unquestioned and all the time is already heart breaking to me.

[spiders-in-the-city]

justice league babysitting

[mysterycitrus]

tbh found family loses all the juice the moment u decide to squeeze all the characters into boring nuclear boxes. “such and such is the dad” “so and so is the mom” “this and that is the oldest daughter” ok well who’s the grieving child who raises a grieving man in his own image, who becomes a symbol of joy and loss in the same name, who loses everything again and rebuilds himself taller and stronger and wiser, who loves the grieving man more than anyone else despite how being near him cuts his hands to bloody scars, who must fly higher, fall faster, outpace death itself so he might never miss another catch, huh

[avalon-of-babylon]

I fucking love genuinely out of touch rich guy Bruce Wayne. Like realistically, yeah, he knows the value of a dollar and how far it gets you but just off the people around him it would be fucking hilarious.

Dick who's lived his entire life in the circus asks for some lunch money.

Rich guy™️ Bruce hands him a thousand because he doesn't have anything smaller.

Reporter Clark Kent casually venting about his 2 mortgages.

Rich guy™️ Bruce tries to relate by talking about how hard it is to juggle his 27 private properties across the world hidden in various shell companies full of millions of dollars worth of batman gear.

Meanwhile Oliver Queen who just has the 1 house, shoves everything into a gym bag and flies his own ass places is sitting there like what the fuck.

Jason certified street kid and son of a drug addict currently splitting rent 5 ways "Yeah it's been hard to keep the lights on with Roy in rehab"

Rich guy™️ Bruce "why don't you dip into your trust fund?"

Jason certified problem child perpetually on the edge of getting disowned. "My what now?"

Commissioner Gordon, father of two, fully aware his daughter is batgirl, spends half his paycheck on his son's indefinite psychiatric treatment, cant afford to leave the rent controlled apartment he's had half his damn life, with a literal nightmare job in the worst city in the world, paranoid because of the stupid amount of corruption around him constantly, and is always on the edge of a mental breakdown.

Rich guy™️ Bruce "You need a vacation. There's this amazing place in the Bahamas you should try-"

Commissioner Gordon, whose idea of a vacation is faking his death for a week in a sting operation, already sobbing.

[welcometogrouchland]

I understand that literature nerd Jason Todd is kind of overblown in fanon compared to it's actual presence in canon (a few issues during his pre (and post?)crisis Robin tenure that highlight it) BUT consider that I think it's hilarious if the unhinged gun toting criminal has strong opinions on poetry

[dailydccomics]

what drives out the darkness? Batman/Superman: World's Finest #32 by Mark Waid and Adrián Gutiérrez

[tiger-grace]

was on the streets of Paris the other day and overheard a conversation that reminded me of the batbros

Dick: Dix-neuf?

Jason: Haha, like deez nuts in French?

Dick: no.. like nineteen….

Jason:

Dick: god I can’t take you ANYWHERE

[ufonaut]

DC'S I KNOW WHAT YOU DID LAST CRISIS #1

Written by DAN DiDIO, REX OGLE, DAVE WIELGOSZ, RACHEL PINNELAS, MATTHEW LEVINE, and others Art by M.L. SANAPO, ADAM GRAPHITE, SID KOTIAN, WILL ROBSON, JORDI TARRAGONA, and others Cover by DAN HIPP Variant covers by EJIKURE and NICOLA SCOTT $9.99 US | 80 pages | Prestige | Variant $9.99 US (card stock) ON SALE 10/2/24

In the blackest night, when the darkness feels infinite, the very fabric of the universe begins to tear…as every major crisis in DCU history rises once again! These eight chilling tales, set during the events of crises past, serve to warn you, dear reader: when in crisis, watch your back. In the fractured world of Flashpoint, Professor Pyg is stalking Gotham City’s nightclubs, sniffing out victims! During Blackest Night, Scarecrow lurks outside a movie theater, recruiting new test subjects to perfect his fear toxin! Even heroes like Nightwing aren’t safe when his death might just have the power to reverse the damage of Infinite Crisis! All these, plus new stories from Crisis on Infinite Earths, Millennium, Zero Hour, The Final Night, and Final Crisis are collected in DC’s I Know What You Did Last Crisis, a deadly new horror anthology coming to haunt you this fall!

[wwprice1]

Eight more amazing DC covers for August!

[homochihuahua]

Dick making everyone uncomfortable in missions debriefing by randomly seating himself side ways in Jason's lap.

No one addresses it, and he talks with a complete unbother face about what they should do, all the while Jason's face turns as red as his helmet, sitting so quietly there with a lapfull of Dick Grayson.

[notfeelingthyaster]

i love the very fandom-ish jason & tim enemy-to-caretaker titans tower au's, don't get me wrong

however, i would love to have MORE of the "jason gets in the tower and finds a fucking rabid-ass feral tim drake and skedaddles 'cause he ain't dealing with that shit" variety, sounds more canon-ish for me

[mikakuna]

you ever think about jason feeling guilty for being the only one in crime alley to make it out, to get adopted by a wealthy person. do you think he feels guilty for messing up his chance, a chance that any crime alley child could only dream of, by dying?

do you think about the guilt that must've coursed through him when he was younger, sitting at the wayne family table eating a single meal that could've fed other crime alley children for a month? how many sleepless nights must he have had, shifting from his luxurious new bed to the floor because he couldn't remember the last time one of the other children slept in actual beds?

do you think he felt guilty about going to one of the richest schools in gotham knowing that most of the crime alley children would never be able to even step foot in a school, too busy worrying about more important matters? he must've had those moments where he was so happy sitting in class because finally i can go to school and i love it i love it so much but then the regret suddenly hits and he remembers those teenagers who loved school and were so close to making it out, yet eventually they'd be spotted on street corners or running drugs.

the guilt must've weighed so heavy on his little shoulders.

[jane-lynndrake-t]

The portrait in higher quality.

Transcript:

New Earth Observer

GOTHAM GLOBE (jane-lynndrake-t)

ISSUE 621 | 12/18/2020 | Morning News | Weather: Bad | AI DNI

Drake Socialite Murdered!

Deborah Donovan B.A.

Janet ’Jane’ Lynn Drake (neé Crowne), a beloved mother and wife passed away on June 21, 2020 at the age of 43.

Born in Gotham, NJ, on January 10 1981, Janet was the daughter of the late Mr. Marvin Noel Crowne and Ms. Patricia Lynn.

She is additionally predeceased by her half brother, James “JT” Thomas Crowne.

She is survived by her husband, Johnson “Jack” Drake, and her 14 year old son, Timothy Jackson Drake.

At the time of her death, she and her husband were kidnapped and ransomed while traveling to assess and provide relief work to the impoverished within the Caribbean islands. During rescue, she was poisoned and declared dead on the scene. Her husband, Mr. Drake is currently recovering.

From a young age, she loved history, the arts, and traveling. Many enjoyed discussions with her about artists, writers, and theater.

An associate of her late half brother recalled conversations between the two as fast paced, varied, and excessively thought provoking.

As a teenager, she was remembered tenderly for her beauty and self confidence. She had a smile despite any challenge she faced.

This bright attitude drew people to her. An old friend from her graduating class described her as a brave woman who was a delight to be around.

After her marriage to Mr. Drake, she became the CFO of Drake Industries. She was known by her associates as a diligent business woman with sharp wit and a sharper eye for character. She is credited for Drake Industries’ upstanding and honest reputation world wide.

Her employees remember her fondly for her unwavering direction and her equal dedication to her son and the company. Many recall the common sight of a 4 year old Timothy Drake carried protectively on her hip as she attended and led meetings.

Photo caption:

Mrs. Drake, May 15 2020, Wayne Charity Auction.

Jewelry Pictured: Auctioned For 4 Million Dollars And Donated To Ace Children’s Hospital (peepdraws)

She will be remembered by Gotham as a charming, noble, and innovative woman.

Her service will be held on December 24 at 4 pm at Pinkney C. Funeral Home.

In lieu of flowers, her Last Will and Testament requests donations to different charities listed on page 10.

[lovecrimer]

hi tumblr this is my plea for really cool really awesome mutuals because i’m really awesome and i like a lot of cool stuff so that’s all bye