#self love is not selfish

[maribellablack]

You can't truly love someone 'till you love yourself first.

I grew up everyone telling me that if I loved myself too much I was a narcissist and too self-centered, only in my late teens I finally understood that self love is neither selfish, nor - egotistic- it's necessary to be kinder, better, more loving and caring to others.

I am grateful for everything I have in my chaotic life and I'm thankful to myself, as I'm still standing (that was totally an Elton John reference)

Happy 20th birthday to me <3

[thepeacefulgarden]

[maxiglow]

the woman i want to be loves to

educate herself on various topics

take care of herself mentally, physically and spiritually

be pretty in her own way. prettiness doesn’t hurt and isn’t strict, it adapts itself through her authenticity

explore her inner world & the outer world

be in tune with her inner child

embrace and understand her emotions, even the bad ones

be kind, specially with herself

be organized, but flexible with what life gives her

work hard, rest hard. she loves to be in harmony and have a balanced life

eat light and nourishing food

feel good in her own skin and she actively work on it everyday

take her meds because she knows it’s good for her

[ineed-to-sleep]

Blacked out in front of my tablet and woke up with sketches of my Touchstarved mc + Kuras my beloved. woops

[girlbossagenda]

HOW TO GET A GLOW UP

‧₊˚❀༉‧₊˚.

I used to be the ugly dunklin, till I change in 1 week and turned pretty much half of my life upside down, it happened right after my 16th catastrophic birthday, at the time I was already following Liz and her tips which helped me so much!! So here how to glow up in minimum 1 week

౨ৎsmell good౨ৎ

This is so important, I noticed how people react to good smelling people, they just say it out loud how much they like the fragrance, knowning that it's you, will just make you more approacable, it boosts your confidence and overl all more liked

౨ৎexercise + diet౨ৎ

This was huge for me, not only it imroves your moods but it also makes your prettier, you need to fist know what goals you want to archive physically, if you want a bigger butt, eggs and potatoes salad can be a good alternative, if you want to have a snatched waist try to do more cardio, at the time the only cardio I used to do was jump roping, which is amazing!!

౨ৎwardrobe౨ৎ

This was the revolution, just dress how ou want each outfit can have at max 2 trendy elements, not more, and the rest it needs to rappresnt YOUR personality!! This is going to make you unique and recognizable!! Also I suggest to go shopping on friday lol, the beauty day!

౨ৎmentality౨ৎ

This is how everything started, a munch of motivational viddeos, the wizard liz and confidence targetting posts, moodboards and much more, at the time I was getting treated really harshly from my classmates, it was probably one of thelowest point of my life, bit I pick myself up, cause I had a goal: Changing my narrative.

There was not sense into staying bitter and hating not only myself but the world around, I wanted to prove to myself that I actually mettered, you don't glow up for other, but for yourself, never, ever welcome in your life people that before put you under the rug, have some respect for yourself and clear boundaries.

Hi bonitas I hope you liked this short post, This is just part of my expereince, tell me if you want to know more + other tips!! maybe I'll make a longer version in the future, Have a great day xoxo gougeous

-𝓐

[one-time-i-dreamt]

A message from my embroidered sleeve to all of you

[zurka-durka]

they got lost

[honeytonedhottie]

take care of YOU first⋆.ೃ࿔*:･🍭

taking care of urself ISNT selfish. its NECESSARY and in this post i'll talk about how to put urself first more without feeling guilty, cuz u shouldn't feel guilty for doing whats best for u…💬🎀

MAKE YOUR PRIORITIES CLEAR ;

make ur priorities clear not only to urself but also to the people around you. if ur priorities aren't clear to you then how are you going to make smart decisions? you need to know what matters to you. some of my priorities are (in this order)

♡ myself

♡ my future

♡ my education + family

everyone's priorities will look different and dont compare your priorities to other people's priorities, and dont feel bad if ur priorities are different from the people around you. honestly i think the only thing that should be constant (in my opinion) is that yourself should be at the top of ur priorities.

BALANCE COMMUNICATION ;

u shouldn't be bending over backwards to answer every phone call, email, or text message. if ur doing something, its okay to be like "hey im busy, i'll get back to you" and you shouldn't feel bad for doing so. thats just you respecting ur own time and doing what u have to do.

i dont rly have this problem cuz im not the best communicator but i do make an effort to get back to people when i can. and its not even like u purposely being unavailable for the people u care about, its just u doing what u need to do first and then getting back to people when u can.

CUT THINGS OUT ;

if u have someone in ur life who is simply taking up space and isnt pouring into u in the way that u are doing for them, then u can cut them off. for example guys who wanna be in the talking stage for a billion years, or people who just like to yap and waste ur time.

if ur not getting something out of a relationship or connection to someone else then u dont HAVE to keep them around. and ik that sounds harsh but people shouldn't be able to walk in and out of ur lives when they please, people shouldn't be able to take ur time and energy and not give anything back. u deserve friendships that are RECIPROCAL. connections with people that SERVE U.

INVEST IN URSELF ;

whatever makes ur life easier, better, healthier, whatever brings u closer to ur goals or makes u feel beautiful is an investment. that includes doing ur nails, doing ur hair or makeup. buying that dress, paying for that course, or paying a little extra for a wellness shot. INVEST in urself cuz you are ur biggest investment.

DONT LET PPL INFILTRATE UR SCHEDULE ;

dont get so caught up in showing up for other people that u forget to show up for yourself. make sure that ur managing ur time wisely and doing what u need to do before u go and say "yes" to invitations or hang outs with friends.

[champagnexowishes]

[universalitgirlsblog2]

💗🍰BECOMING SELFISH IS THE BEST THING I DID💗🍰

This post is my notes of thewizardliz video of the same topic as this post . I always tend to lose the notes I make 😑, so I thought that I should make a post on this ( lol )

💗STOP ARGUING WITH PEOPLE WHO AREN'T WILLING TO LISTEN

If the boundaries were crossed, the conversation is over . They aren't worth your time or energy.

🍰START PRIORITIZING YOUR OWN NEEDS & WANTS

" Whatever I want , goes first ". Fill your own cup first, Are you whole ? Are you okay ?

💗STOP BEING ALWAYS AVAILABLE & TRYING TO SAVE EVERYONE

You cannot save everyone. To be honest , you cannot same anyone . If a person does not want to change , if a person doesn't want to be saved,you will not save anyone & just end up losing your energy.

🍰SOMETIMES YOU HELPING IS ACTUALLY SABOTAGING GOD'S PLAN

People get certain problems or situations in their life because God gives them , it's for them to go through. So they can become wiser & fulfill their life purpose. If someone is stepping in & trying to be their savior , they are sabotaging God's plan & blocking their own blessings.

💗START BEING OKAY WITH PEOPLE MISUNDERSTANDING YOU

They don't have to understand you. It's very reasonable they don't understand you , people have come from different countries , culture, environment. They don't have the same mindset or heart as you. You cannot make them understand you because they aren't you. If you constantly go through life thinking everybody has the same heart as you , you will be hurt . People are different. Let them be.

🍰REALISE THAT YOU CAN ONLY CHANGE YOURSELF

Humans love comfort. In order to change, it requires alot of courage , strength & discomfort. If you are constantly putting your energy trying to change people , to become their best version. You are wasting your energy that you can use to become your best version. Lead by example .

💗STOP NEEDING PEOPLE TO VALIDATE YOUR SELF WORTH

You don't need anyone to tell you how good , smart or beautiful you are , if you already see those qualities in yourself. If you only feel that you are a good person when someone else tells you that you are a good person, if you need validation from other people , then you are just a slave of other people because their opinion can change your reality.When you are the one who always creates their own reality. You have to be strong in your own self , tell yourself how amazing you are.

🍰TALK TO YOURSELF , TAKE YOURSELF ON A DATE , HUG YOURSELF , COMPLIMENT YOURSELF

Say in the mirror how amazing you are to yourself.

💗LESS CHASING MORE ATTRACTING

Tune in with your feminine energy . Be relaxed, just do what is good for you & your body. Become open to receiving to your blessings & manifestations. If you aren't desperately chasing after things , then you are really whole.

🍰ONLY ADDING GREAT PEOPLE IN YOUR LIFE

Allow people who add value in your life. Do they make you happy ? Is it a both way thing ?.

💗STOP SEEKING PEOPLE'S PERMISSION TO DO WHAT YOU WANT.

You don't need anyone's permission to do what is good for yourself. You know yourself well enough. " I know I can do it & I will do it " . Others opinions should be irrelevant to you , how cocky people can be to think that they know you better than you know yourself. They haven't gone through anything you have gone through. They haven't lived your life so who are they to decide what is good for you ? " Mmmm..none of your buisness ,goodbye "

[positivelypresent]

Some self-care ideas to add to your May to-do list! ☺️💕

[thepeacefulgarden]

[maxiglow]

beeillustrates

[kanjichris]

"why don't you want him to know how much you love him?" "that's a little personal. he knows." "uh-huh."

[girlbossagenda]

August ⋆.˚ ᡣ

A month of growth, discovery, end of the summer, last minute beach day, dreaming of fall, pearls, starfish, walks in nature, library, quiet afternoon reading books, new hairstyles

[agirlwithglam]

becoming selfish is the best thing i ever did.

✧*. * · ~ thewizardliz 💖🕯

💖 stop going into arguments with people who are not willing to listen. it is completely useless. if your boundaries were crossed, and the other person is not willing to say "im sorry for doing that, i won't do it again", then conversation over. its done. its not worth your time or energy.

🕯prioritise your own needs and wants. fill your own cup! are you okay? are you whole? if you don't want to do something, dont do it. whatever you want, comes first.

💖 stop being always available and trying to save everyone. if you keep on being there for people- again and again and again, you are letting people use you. people will only reach out to you if they have problems or they need help. but what about when everything is going good? then what? do they come to you? you are showing them that they can always come to you and you will always be there but that shouldn't be the case. be able to say "i dont want to listen to your problems today. i have enough of my own problems and goals to worry about." the only reason they come is because YOU allow them to come.

you ask yourself why does anyone not make sure i am ok? thats because YOU do not make sure you're okay. remember that you cannot save everyone. IT IS NOT YOUR JOB TO SAVE EVERYONE.

🕯sometimes god gives you situations so you can grow. also if you are constantly trying to step in for God to help and save everyone, you may also be sabotaging God's plan. people give certain problems/ situations in their life because God gives it to them so they can grow wiser and better! why are you trying to save them? its not your responsibility.

💖 be okay with people misunderstanding you. if you have a goal or a dream in your life, NOT EVERYONE IS GOING TO UNDERSTAND YOU. people come from different households, religions, schools, etc. they will not understand you or have the same mindset/ heart as you. be OKAY with people not understanding you. they are not you.

"oh why did they hurt me/ treat me like that, i would never do that to them" honey, they're not you. they don't have the same personality or heart as you. if you're constantly gonna go through life thinking that everyone has the same heart as you, you will be hurt. i have done that so often thinking that i'm a good friend to them so they will do the same back, its not always true. you will be hurt. people are just different. and thats okay! let them be.

🕯realise that you can only change yourself. stop trying to change people. they will not change unless they are willing to. our human nature is comfort- humans love comfort. in order to change, it takes going through discomfort. it takes strength. some people are completely oblivious to themselves- they think that everything is perfect and nothing is wrong with them, etc. and yk what? let them be. you cannot change them. but you can change yourself. and if you do not want to change, you're not going to change. no one can force you to change unless you want to. by trying to change others and help them become their best version, you're wasting your energy to become YOUR best version and to create your dream life!

💖 stop needing people to validate your self worth. "i dont need anyone to tell me how good i am. i dont need anyone to tell me how beautiful i am or smart i am. because i see those qualities in myself already." KNOW who you are. if you get a compliment, say thankyou, be grateful. but don't crave it. be okay with not receiving it and not needing it because you already know that you're all that. if you need that compliment or words from other people, then they are basically in charge of you because their opinion can change your reality entirely and shake you. when YOU are the one that always creates your own reality! be strong in your ownself otherwise you'll be like their little puppet. know that you know what? im amazing. i've been through so much stuff in life but i'm still coming out strong and i'm still standing.

🕯treat yourself as your own best friend. talk to yourself! in her video, liz said that she talks to herself before bed and tells herself about her day. (for that i recommend videoing yourself! its so much fun) or when she's stressed she says to herself why are you feeling stressed? what exactly are you feeling? and then she tells herself and talks to herself. BE YOUR OWN BEST FRIEND. hype yourself up in your mind! comfort yourself, have a conversation, etc. give the advice to yourself. go on dates with yourself, hug yourself, love yourself.

💖 less chasing, more attracting. being feminine basically means letting it flow and go. being calm and at peace. being relaxed because you know that you attract all your blessings. when you're not desperately looking for things, or chasing after things, then your whole. your energy is whole. when the energy of desperation is gone, then you can attract everything you want into your life.

🕯only add great people to your life. make sure that whoever you date, are friends with, hang around- they need to add value to your life. its not only in terms of money, its also in terms of are you making me happy? are you reciprocating my energy? people that are always negative or always complaining, do not allow them into your life. do not be friends with people who are being miserable then complain about being miserable but don't do anything about it.

💖 stop seeking other people's permission to do whats best for you. you don't need someone to say "you can do it!" because you know you can. be independent- liz doesn't need to ask anyone for money because she is already making her own money. she is doing everything for herself. she has everything she need to support herself and people she loves.

like how cocky are you to think that you know be better than i know myself? lol. you have not been through what i have been through. you have not lived my life and yet you're here deciding whats good for me and what i should be doing? um, no thanks! xoxo.