#my dissociation is
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Microdosing polyamory by dating a system
#my bf does not have DID but I like to tell him that he’s microdosing polyamory#system tag#did system#plural system#osdd system#traumagenic system#sysblr#dissociative system#system stuff#dissociation#dissociative identity disorder#actually dissociative#other specified dissociative disorder#complex dissociative disorder#dissociative amnesia#dissociative alters#dissociative identities#did memes#did#did osdd#did alter#did community#actually did#hc did#plurality#pluralgang#plural community#plural stuff#plural memes
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i know he ate a cheese
#my art#pokemon#maushold#pokemon scarvi#scarvi#i named my maushold suds n duds. in my mind the little baby mausholds are actually just made of cloth and the big mausholds knitted them#they're not evil but they go into a dissociative state and commit atrocities#like eating a whole choese#maushold the best pokemon ever made. i think it can digging in the ground for tubers#personally
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can't even cat nap in peace 😾
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more windbreaker comics
#poor sakura couldnt even KO for 10 minutes before everyone started prodding and jabbing him like damn#EVERYONE LOVES HARUKA SAKURA SUPREMECY!!!!!#wind breaker spoilers#wind breaker 149#haruka sakura#and...gang... my energy lvls are too low im not tagging everyone closes eyes#wind breaker#wind breaker comics#comics#thecmart#cant believe its been two weeks since i made a post ashdfkj my dissociation is getting the best of me smh#dw i still have wb brainrot endou in those last two chapters was just FUELLING it hes a riot man what a guy#cant believe he really woke up and did the draw me like one of ur french girls poses this guy is so unserious#ILL BE BACK WITH MORE NONSENSE SOON... eventually.... i just gotta get my mental health in check like PHEW this noggin be foggin
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In-system relationships can be so intimate.
Waking up together, opening the same eyes, and stretching the same limbs. Yawning in time and saying a good morning that only you who are involved can understand what it's for.
Sharing a meal, not only from the same plate, but with the same hands and the same senses. Deciding what to eat together, something that fits all of your tastes.
Curled in the same bed, in the same blankets, in the same body, drowzily mumbling about nothing and everything to each other. Joking around and feeling their sleepy laugh as if it were your own.
Living life, and inviting them to share yours and your time in it--performing your daily tasks in the unison of cofront. Seeing and hearing and feeling everything together.
Feeling them blush when you flirt or compliment them. Feeling their joy when you get them a gift, or how safe you make them feel simply when you're around them.
Enveloped in the same love, from the same brain, with the same feeling of care for each other palpable between you. Feeling the emotions you feel yourself, coming from the other person. Feeling their love for you, in the rawest, most direct possible way.
#endo safe#plural#pluralgang#actually plural#plural system#plurality#system#in sys relationships#in sys dating#alterhuman#osddid#did osdd#actually did#quoigenic#cdd inclus#pluralpunk#did community#dissociative identity disorder#terrorpunk#pro endo#op#vince (he/they)#@ my insys partners. yes. all of you#i love you
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forgetful one
#i was sitting there stewing in how bad my memory and dissociation has gotten in the last year but then thought that i wouldnt be upset with#thank you Sif love you Sif#isat#in stars and time#dy art#isat siffrin
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Friendly (or unfriendly if you're against this) reminder that this blog is supportive of ALL disorders. This blog does not think ANY disorder inherently makes someone a bad person, and is against any disorder being demonized. This blog wholeheartedly believes that a bad person having a disorder, yes, even if things that are also symptoms of their disorder are part of what caused harm, does not make the disorder a "bad" or "evil" disorder or excuse ableism and demonization directed towards the disorder.
Yes this includes personality disorders
Including npd and aspd
Yes this includes all psychotic disorders & disorders that cause psychotic symptoms
Yes this includes paraphilic disorders. All of them.
Yes this includes disorders that cause, or are even characterized by, attention seeking
Yes this includes disorders that directly have lying as a common symptom
Yes this includes dissociative disorders
Yes this includes any disorder with "gross" symptoms
Yes this includes physical disorders too
Yes this includes disorders that can cause loss of control of any kind- control of speech, control of body movement, etc.
Yes tis includes disorders that make someone "look scary"
This goes for literally any fucking disorder. There are not exceptions.
#disability activism#ableism#demonization#disability awareness#personality disorders#npd#aspd#psychotic#psychotic disorders#paraphilic disorder#attention seeking#pathological lying#dissociative disorder#idk what other tags to put#also additional note I literally have a couple disorders on this list#and symptoms of several too#so if you're thinking of trying to argue on this post just fuck off#I guarantee you will not change my mind#and I don't want to hear it either
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When you get to comfortable using "We" pronouns and accidentally use it in front of someone you probably shouldn't:
#system problems#i feel like im doxxing my alters when i do that#dissociative identity disorder#did#other specified dissociative disorder#actually dissociative#did system#dissociative system#actually did#osdd#actually osdd#osdd system#systemhood#headmates#did osdd headmates#did headmates#pronouns#dissociative disorder#dissociation#derealization#depersonalization#endos dni#no endos#endos not for you
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#its always october in my brain#dissociation#shifting#shiftblr#shifting community#desired reality#dr#dreamer#maladaptive daydreaming#maladapting daydreaming disorder
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"What's your favorite type of music?"
*sweats in DID* "U-uhm... I- I listen to everything, depending on my mood :D"
The moods sitting in the back of my head watching me: "No, no, they've got a point"
#this was funnier in my head#literally me and 2 others came up w it and it was funnier#did#osdd#did system#osdd system#dissociative identity disorder#did osdd#system#other specified dissociative disorder#system stuff#system things#osdd 1a#osdd 1b#actually median#median system#actually did#actually osdd#cdid system#cdid#hc did system#hc did#highly complex did#complex dissociative identity disorder#complex did#highly complex dissociative identity disorder#did memes#did jokes#osdd memes#osdd jokes
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Hey, you! You who suspect you might have PTSD, DID or another trauma disorder, but you think you didn't experience trauma "bad enough" to have developed a mental disorder from it? Let me suggest looking at it differently:
"If there's smoke, there's fire"
Do you experience symptoms of PTSD, such as hypervigilance, trouble sleeping, flashbacks, memory problems, dissociation, ect? Then yes, it was "bad enough". Maybe you don't remember anything "really bad" happening or you don't "feel like" it affects you, but listen to your body. The body remembers and the body doesn't care if you think it is "stupid" or "weak" to have a panic attack when someone touches you or that you still have nightmares about that thing you saw when you were 4 years old
Trauma isn't what happened. Trauma is the reaction to what happened. So what I'm trying to say is that if the reason you think you can't have PTSD/DID/OSDD/ect is because you didn't go through anything horrific enough for that, then maybe forget about what happened to you for a moment and just look at the evidence your body and mind are showing. And then, most importantly, be compassionate with yourself. You're going through a lot and it's gonna be okay in the end. Take it easy, okay? <3
#posting now instead of forgetting it in a draft per usual#actually traumatized#actually ptsd#actually did#actually cptsd#actually cdd#actually osdd#actually dissociative#actuallytraumatized#actuallyabused#actuallydissociative#actuallydid#actuallycdd#actuallyptsd#actuallycptsd#actuallyosdd#personal#my posts
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I dont want to fight anymore
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i feel like we don’t always talk about the smaller ways that having a dissociative disorder (and not being “out” about it) can really disable a person— i’m in a choir, and idk how to explain to the musical director that SOMETIMES i am a soprano and have no trouble hitting high notes while other times i feel like i physically cannot sing that high. or how sometimes my guitar feels like an extension of my body but sometimes i don’t even remember how i’m supposed to hold it properly. or in art therapy when i only sometimes have access to my adult level of artistic skill while sometimes i have the skill level of a five year old. my dissociative disorder very much disables me, and this is something i don’t see people talking about outside of the ways that PTSD disables those with dissociative disorders. what i mean is that sometimes i do not have the ability to do very basic tasks. dissociative disorders are developmental disorders, and i am very much developmentally disabled much of the time.
i don’t plan on ever being publicly out about my dissociative disorder in a non anonymous setting. i have a hard time even talking about my parts in therapy even to the clinician that diagnosed me with DID. it feels unbearably vulnerable and not safe to tell people about my parts. i feel like we’re seeing more and more people on tik tok start talking publicly about their DID, and while that may be very helpful for them, i honestly can’t imagine ever being fully out with it like that. keeping it secret is what has kept me safe, it is how i survived the last twenty years of my life. my experience with DID also does not line up with most of the DID content i’ve seen online— and i don’t mean this to invalidate those whose experiences are different than mine, it’s just that it can feel really lonely and isolating to have a dissociative disorder that doesn’t fit with the worlds preconceived image of what a dissociative disorder looks like. this is part of why i typically just say that i have dissociative disorder instead of DID.
tldr: dissociative disorders can really impair basic functioning and i feel like people forget that when they focus so much on the parts of DID that are more sensationalized in the media.
#i hope someone out there relates to this#DID#dissociative identity disorder#actually dissociative#dissociative disorder#dissociative disorders#did osdd#osdd#actually traumatized#did system#actually did#my words#mine
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Having Littles in your system isn't about buying candy, squishmallows, and giggling.
Littles in your system is also finding yourself in your bed, covers up to your chin, death grip on a stuffed animal, feeling there's a pile of bricks on your chest and you've stopped breathing. Because you are a grown adult but the smallest, slightest proximity to a trigger switched your brain to being a 6 year old and afraid again.
Littles in your system is having a switch and not knowing why the body is in a panic attack but knowing you were brought out because the little can't regulate emotions so you have to, even if you don't know the context yet, or ever.
But no. This is tumblr so all you're going to see is posts about how cute and silly their Littles are.... yeah... because that's what it's really like.... *sigh*
#posts from my system#actually did#actually dissociative#dissociative system#dissociative identity disorder#did community#endos dni#traumagenic system#did system#complex dissociative disorder#did/osdd#osddid#did osdd
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This page fought me every step of the way.
I’m trying to get the pacing back under control cause starting on page 6 instead of 1 messed up the way pages lead into eachother. I spent like an hour shuffling the panels around trying to get a nice layout going and had other people helping me. Don’t even talk to me about colouring. And I had to redraw like 50% of the panels cause I’d initially drawn this out like two months ago.
Narinder is built like a bag of bones, does not take much to send him across a room.
First // Previous // Next
#my post#my art#no devotion au#cult of the lamb#cotl#cult of the lamb narinder#cotl narinder#cult of the lamb the one who waits#cotl the one who waits#cult of the lamb heket#cotl heket#cult of the lamb fanart#digital art#art#photoshop#comic art#fan comic#tw violence#tw blood#tw dissociation#tw mild eyestrain
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#girlhood#coquette#esoteric#girlblog aesthetic#dollcore#dollette#girlblogging#lana del ray aka lizzy grant#lana unreleased#coquette girl#blythe doll#girl rotting#lana del rey#ldr aesthetic#black swan#my year of rest and relaxation#lisbon sisters#hell is a teenage girl#mazzy star#dissociative identity disorder#this is what makes us girls#esoteric girl#girl interrupted syndrome#cinnamon girl#the virgin suicides#layla buffalo 66#lizzy grant#female hysteria#mitski#female rage
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