#medians not for you

[anti-endo-safe-space]

If endos were real, their experiences would be entirely separate from our community's and would most likely require separate terms in many ways. As well as the fact that we are...trauma survivors. Getting told your experiences aren't real sucks for anyone, but when you add on the layer of trauma especially with how all trauma has struggles with denial but especially in CDDs, you'd think endos would acknowledge that yeah, our needs might be a bit more important.

If endos were real, their experiences would be NOTHING like ours. So their insistence on sharing a space, sharing terms, being accepted by us trauma survivors (which can often warp a lot of things and obvs make us all sensitive to many things), and we must sacrifice our boundaries to accept them. We MUST share with them. We MUST accept them. Us even putting "endos dni" regardless of our stance is equivalent to terrible things to them. And then have the audacity to call us bigots, traumascum, and sysmeds.

For...wanting a space for us and our experiences. Especially when a lot of people don't even believe in our trauma or disorders. When many professionals don't even believe in us. You'd think if endos actually cared, they would put us forth and also try to support us instead of ignoring boundaries, being angry that we want a separate space, and being upset. (All under the hypothetical that endogenics are a real concept and do exist.)

But no. Instead they insist on encroaching on our space, using the same terms, spreading misinformation, playing the victim, and guilting and manipulating to be accepted (which says a lot of they claim to be a minority since...that's not how minorities fight for acceptance. At all. It's not about guilt or using terms like "sysmed" to shame people.)

If they were real, you'd think they would be able to understand the importance of trauma survivor spaces. Our system also has NPD and ASPD and yeah, being pushed out of trauma spaces because of stuff like "narcissist abuse" and all sucks so yes, having limited trauma spaces for CDDs also sucks as endos take it over. Trauma spaces are important and yet they want to take over ours, mimic our experiences, use all the same words. They'll say they do no harm, but they do. When CDDs already have so little thanks to endos in the past and the harm that Empowered Multiplicity did to purposefully make it harder for us. For endos to claim our experiences, claim they're similar, claim to be able to use our terms, and to place their own experiences above ours is fucking insulting. Especially for the endos that say they have trauma too. Then you should KNOW how important spaces like this are. If endos were real, we should NOT have shared spaces because the experiences will NEVER be the same.

Endos, even if real, will never face the same kinds of things we do. They will NEVER know what it's like to have an experienced formed from trauma and have it be entirely fucking denied.

Would love (sarcastically) to see if they tried this shit with other disorders. I'm sure some have, but if it were as big as endos vs CDDs are, that would really fucking show everything and how fucking disgusting endos can be.

(again when I mention endos being real, purely a hypothetical "what if" thing to show how their intense desire to share space and be accepted by us traumagenics is completely fucking harmful and ableist all the same. trauma survivor spaces especially for specific disorders are so important. yet instead they want to prioritize their own so much that people have to literally say "this is not for you endos" when talking about their shit.)

Going paragraph by paragraph because we figured might be easier to do lol.

You'd think that. I know we hope that IF they did exist they'd understand that. Trauma survivors get told so often that if it wasn't "bad enough" (any trauma is enough and shouldn't happen) that more and more doubt if they're real and valid and it's horrible. Endos we've seen only make it worse by goingi "oh yeah that ain't bad enough your just one of us uwu"

They'd be absolutely nothing like ours. If they did somehow exist, they'd have no need for a persecutor or a protector or a trauma holder. They'd have no need for alters who literally HAVE to try and keep everyone safe from trauma. They seem to be convinced that if your anti endo you want them dead. That's not true. I know we just hope they can get help because if they do believe that there is other people WITHOUT any sort of trauma then they need to get help because that's a different disorder. The worst thing we've found about traumascum and sysmed is they're taking words used for transmedicalists and are using it as if systems aren't a mental disorder

They're the type to believe that if you don't want them in your space, then your horrible. That if you decide you want a place away from them then your evil. Like if you said "hey we don't hate endos, they've just caused us pain before so can endos not interact" they take that as you bringing harassment. If endos were real and cared, they'd be willing to try and help us, not make it worse

We actually once saw an endo trying to justify needing a protector because they "needed to be protected from sysmeds". Like no. If your so desperate to be a part of us, make your own terms. Don't take ours and use our space. Minorities will fight for equality yes, but not by shaming people like that or trying to manipulate everyone.

We get that. We highly suspect some of us having NPD. And the amount of anti-endo spaces we've seen that absolutely ban anyone with NPD from interacting is huge. We will reiterate this from previous posts, narcissistic abuse DOES NOT EXIST. A disorder is not abusive! People are! With endos trying to take over the few spaces that aren't like that, they're trying to take more and more away from people who need the spaces for their disorders. It's why yes, we believe racism can be for any race but white people shouldn't be in BIPOC spaces talking about how bad they have it because it will NEVER be the same. They are two compltely different things. (we know we brought in two completely different subjects but it's one of the best views we can think of rn)

If endos exist, they will never understand what it's like to have different alters be something like violent because of trauma they had. They don't know what it's actually like and never will

We have seen some try to compare it with disorders and we found a good one. Take PTSD. A literal TRAUMATIC disorder. If someone went "oh yeah I don't have trauma but I have PTSD" people would be PISSED. They'd be up in arms. Even when it originally wasn't considered just a simply traumatic disorder (used to be shell-shock). What's the difference there? Because one says trauma in the name? Dissociative disorders come from trauma, not just CDD's.

We fully get that and we wanted to say thank you for clarifying (and we're sorry if we came across rude in the last ask you sent, we struggle imensly with social cues).

[cosmossystem]

what i feel like is lacking from conversations about plurality is how genuinely, fundamentally cool it is to be plural. doesnt it fascinate you how our brains can create entirely new selves, inner worlds, inner structures to keep itself afloat? doesnt it make you so curious? especially with regards to atypical plural experiences. i dont hate people for having entire systems full of fragments or fictives or subsystems. in fact, i find it wonderful, a miracle of the mind. you have a complicated inner world with unique lore? incredible, how did that develop? your entire system is full of fictives from the same source? thats amazing, hows that going? your system has entire layers on itself, with several systems running in tandem? wow, thats fascinating, how did you know? you believe you came from different worlds? tell me about them. please, tell me more about yourselves. id love to hear it. i do not fear the potential of the human brain.

[lefluoritesys]

Yet another thing I don't see talked about in the DID community: the host anxiety of letting go of front.

Obviously it doesn't happen to every system, as some systems don't even have a host; but can we talk about the fear and anxiety about potentially never coming back to front if you fully let go, as a host? I dealt with it for a year and a half until I was able to actually start letting go and sitting off front for long periods of time. But there were times when 5 minutes off front fully caused me panic attacks.

This fear especially comes when you are a baby (newly discovered) system. This feeling that you built a life for yourself, and suddenly, you feel like you'll lose it to other people. And it's not that you want it all for yourself, but losing it entirely is what's scary. And there is usually a whole inner world behind you... who knows what happens inside of it, what it can do, who lives there? As well as, it's scary to let go of control of events IRL. Who knows how others would handle it, even if you know them well already?

And that's just our reasons.

Moral of the story: y'all are not alone, and it gets better.

-host

[remainingeden]

When you start the night wanting to be mean but he gives you such a 🥺 look you have to just sigh and tell yourself "next time"

[clevercorvidae]

keep thinking thinking about the relativity falls au and i've realized idk who id swap with soos. but honestly the funniest possible choice would be to just leave him as himself. like hes the ONE universal constant ane everyone else is swapped

[sbblake]

written by william gold, performed by wilbur soot ⭐️

<3 follow my twitter here:

[weirdmageddon]

heres the original pic i took an hour to edit btw i hope it’s convincing at a glance

[booasaur]

wtFOCK - 7x03

[thecranewivesrpf]

the only thing you can do about your troubles is project them onto your blorbos

[starfallsystemblog2]

Lmao "no one legitimately want endos dead" lmao says the one who never gets death threats or been doxxed ever in their life

[host-cultureis]

proxy median system host culture Imposter Syndrome Blast 1000. because of the curses (being in the front forever and the others have to talk through you and sometimes it just. fucking feels like roleplaying because it doesnt really feel like anyone else is in front With me but i know theyre Somewhere There). you understand -💤

.

[anti-endo-safe-space]

So, we've seen a lot of people flaming fictives/introjects from things like Harry Potter, Twilight, DSMP, that kind of thing and we wanted to make this post.

With most of those posts, we've seen a lot of comments saying "they need to source separate" but if it's from a nonproblematic source that's not being said. Here's the thing. If an alter feels comfortable source separating, then that's one thing. We have about 4 alters from the Harry Potter franchise because we were absorbed in it when a lot of trauma happened.

None of us feel comfortable source separating. Some of us, like the fictive of Regulus Black, don't feel entirely connected to source. But notice, he hasn't changed his name. He doesn't PLAN on changing his name because while he is distant, he still feels ties. Do any of us support JKR? Hell no. We hate her with a burning passion.

Does that mean we refuse to do something like read fanfiction of HP? No, we write it because it helps Regulus process trauma, both source and his own, it helps others realize stuff will get better.

And gods forbid someone has a "cringe" source. We have a fictive from Twilight. She's pretty source connected because, well, she's source connected and wants to be. That doesn't mean your evil for being source disconnected.

We've got an introject of DanTDM, specifically his earlier videos. Does Dan (ours, we'll refer to the actual as DanTDM) enjoy watching those because it reminds him of his past? Yeah. But while he recognizes that he's from DanTDM, he doesn't feel he is him fully. He's his own person and that's okay.

Basically the point of this which we kinda missed. An introject does not reflect their source. It is not fair to demand that because an introjects source/creator is toxic that they source separate. Your being cruel and horrible for no reason that way.

We're well aware of the fact that we might lose followers, and if we do, then we don't want you here.

[cosmossystem]

can pro-endo and/or pro-ship blogs interact with this post or follow us or send asks or something? weve been dealing with right-wingers & medicalists in our notes for like a week now and its been a bad time. and also we wanna make more mutuals on this blog <3

[m0ther-of-p3arl]

reblog for greater sample size if you want :3c

[median-culture-is]

median culture is 'i am the only one here' but in the way all the parts of a set are one set, in the way all the peices of a jigsaw puzzle are one puzzle, in the way the all the branches of a tree still make up one tree, in the way that-

.

[compacflt]

Hi, big fan of your fics. I've just found your Tumblr and binged everything Icemav-related. When reading about Icemav's political beliefs, I've gotten curious. Does Bradley share the same political beliefs as Ice (and Mav)? Does being raised by them or them pulling his papers influence how he votes? Or there are other factors in the play (e.g. generations, social media)? How about Jake and the other Daggers? How does this young generation of the Navy perceive politics (elections, gender, etc.)? My apologies for bombarding you with questions. But as a non-American, American politics have always been something we must pay attention to. I've seen many interesting interpretations on Tumblr but it feels more or less wistful than realistic, but I might be wrong (again not an American) so I would love to see your perspective on this. Thank you.

a good politics roundup post before i leave this blog

icemav & their conservatism: here, here, here

ice’s NECESSARY conservatism as commander of the pacific fleet (i.e. officers who are most likely to get promoted to the highest ranks do NOT break the service line when it comes to domestic politics, so by necessity ice would’ve had to keep his mouth shut, he Cannot be both a four-star and a revolutionary, like he just can’t; and being a revolutionary is otherwise antithetical to his character anyway): here, here.

and the original “ice & mav politics post” which is being updated here: here

I’ve gone back and forth on everyones politics over the last year of me being involved with these characters, but let me just tell you where I’ve ended up headcanoning them politically, if ur interested

ice: reagan democrat. “educated moderate” who was more right-leaning pre-9/11. now just a regular ol liberal (did you SEE those gay little round glasses in tgm? no way this guy isn’t a straight-up lib) with absolutely no strong feelings about most domestic politics besides “fascism bad”. Has some foreign policy opinions that areeeee questionable at best, like all members of the military elite (hangman voice: DO NOT ASK ICEMAN ABOUT CHINA. WORST MISTAKE OF MY LIFE). foreign policy neoliberal favoring the dovish side of the spectrum. A force conservator (“let’s save our military assets [read: my boyfriend maverick 🥺] for when we really need them, not for any old conflict. the deterring specter of the American war machine should outweigh the risk of underperforming”). He’s in favor of marriage equality of course, but treats it like a privilege and not a right. would be sad/upset if it got repealed but wouldn’t necessarily fight for it. “well at least my marriage will always be legal in california so i just won’t leave, problem solved.” Normie median Biden voter.

mav: political wildcard tbh. original 1986 mav is DEFINITELY right-leaning (i think i’ve written elsewhere, “he fully believes bill clinton is an affront to god”). i get young republican vibes from him. Full on patriotic (but dispassionate) 1980s reaganite anti-commie neoconservative. but after the 2010s i am very confused tbh. Tom cruise’s political aura is an insanely confusing one. idk. No matter what, Mav has some Hot Takes that a.) can immediately be shot down by ice using Facts and Logic at any time and b.) are not strictly partisan. He’s registered democrat just to support marriage equality (his marriage is his top priority but he doesn’t care about Other gays’ marriages, only his own), doesn’t care about any of the party’s other lines. Votes however ice tells him to. I get real “kind clueless libertarian” vibes from 2022 maverick tbh. Especially with the “isolating himself in a hangar in the middle of the mojave desert.” that has a political connotation to it for sure. bro just does whatever he wants out there

also, ice & mav live in San Diego, which… while in blue/democrat leaning California…is famously a bastion of right-wingers & has a hitler particle level off the charts… (sorry its not my favorite place in the world). That’s why they’re both continually so disgusted by San Francisco (a metonym for effete liberal homosexuality). Theyre from San Diego, hatred of SF & liberal SF politics is kinda par for the course down there.

Bradley: as u will see in the extras i definitely hc Bradley as an activist, but because he’s… in the navy and also like in his 30s… It’s not college campus activism, it’s just “things all of us in the left wing can agree upon” activism. so, like, BLM or pride, etc. He’s an “in this house we believe” yard sign liberal. He is 38 years old. hes a solid millennial so not politically hip with the kids (me)

Bradley & ice/mav disagree on the VISIBILITY of politics. Ice & mav, who did live through the vietnam era draft/near-dissolution of American society in the 60s and 70s, are not in favor of possibly losing their job/honor they have fought and killed for, for the sake of a political statement. And they believe their relationship IS a political statement, whereas Bradley would rather encourage them to treat their relationship like, I don’t know, a relationship that has a right to exist independent of politics!

Jake and the other daggers: idk. i don’t really give a shit about the daggers sorry. They r blank slates 2 me. jake especially is canonically frat-boy sexist in a way that gives me the heebs, much like original 1986 maverick and ice. But the navy tends to be the most left-wing (or thought of as left wing in common thought) service of the military, if that helps. But it is also the most traditional service of the military, and by traditional I mean BRITISH!!!! 🇬🇧💂there’s so much pomp and circumstance and hoity-toitiness that comes from the navy’s origins in the Royal Navy. A lot of sticking to outdated tradition in the very fabric of the navy itself, while the navy’s enlisted demographics shift younger and more left-wing/“revolutionary…” some interesting conflicts there. Like that one sailor who got blasted by multiple congressmen on social media for (with permission!) reading a poem about their queer identity on the USS Gerald ford’s intercom a few months back, if I remember correctly. Hoo boy the Takes that day were wild. Younger Americans tend to be more liberal but YMMV with officers, who are by nature trying to uphold outdated traditions of the navy for the sake of keeping the navy a unified service

i am of course writing carole as a christian republican who has gay friends and a gay kid not by choice but by the Grace of God