#like idk how to tell you this but people tend to just be people
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Sevika x chubby reader where the reader is a councilor. They make eyes during meetings where Sevika looks the reader up and down. Sevika flirts with reader right after until they have to leave. This keeps happening for a few meetings until reader shows up in a more showy outfit just to show off for Sevika. She resists ending the meeting early just to get to reader sooner. After, a different (male?) councilor gets to reader first, he attempts flirting with the reader and Sevika ofc pushes aside the guy and probably insults him for speaking to reader lmao and I was picturing this ending with Sevika and reader waiting until everyone leaves (or sevika telling everyone to get out) and having ✨intimacy✨ in the councilor room. But you can end it differently ofc. This is just a dabble tbh, just an idea that came to mind once I saw your post about it. Hope this sparks some inspiration!
୨so… what now?୧
councillor!sevika X f!councillor!reader
🏷️: lesbian sex, porn with a side of plot, fingering (r!receiving), oral (r!receiving), semi-public sex, reader is chubby, pet names used, stone top sevika, no beta we die like men
🦌:tysm for this angel.. I was half asleep when i wrote this so it might not be very good. Idk. i hope it’s okay & I’m sorry it took so long to answer!! it’s short but that’s cause i scrapped it a few times. i left it how it was for posting cause i didn’t wanna force myself to write and then have it be awful 😔
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when sevika became a councillor, she’d expected to spend all her time with selfish rich people who aren’t concerned for anything but their own causes. what she hadn’t expected was you.
sure, you were a filthy rich piltie, but you used that money for things other than yourself. you lived luxuriously but you spent the money you didn’t use to help people. and you were the only councillor, apart from her, to argue that zaun deserves equal attention to piltover.
immediately she was enamoured with you. it also helped that you were utterly breathtaking— soft and feminine, yet tantalisingly sexy. and after your first conversation, in which she almost went insane after you fawned over her prosthetic arm, she noticed you tended to float towards her a whole lot more.
you made eyes at her constantly, which she more than gladly returned, and most of your post-meeting conversations were simply the two of you flirting back and forth until somebody called you away for whatever the reason.
another thing she noticed was that your clothing changed. you’d always been feminine. but she noticed that since your first conversation you gradually wore.. less clothing? of course, you weren’t crossing the boundary of indecent exposure, but the slits in your dresses gradually crawled up your thighs day by day, and the necklines creeped lower. on occasion, sevika would notice you leaning forward in your seat diagonally from hers, just enough to give her a glimpse of your décolletage.
and naturally, it wasn’t only sevika that noticed this. there was another councillor who’d taken a liking to you. and being the lovely person you were, you’d laughed politely at his attempts to flirt with you and had returned the same energy— only your smile didn’t quite reach your eyes like it did with sevika, your voice never had the same airy tone. it did stroke her ego a little, but that didn’t mean the situation didn’t piss her off.
after a particularly stressful meeting, sevika was already on edge. when she saw you and aforementioned councillor talking. except he had you much closer this time, and you didn’t seem particularly thrilled. so, she intervened.
after a swift argument and sevika having to resist the urge to punch things, the two of you had been left alone.
it hadn’t been difficult, getting her this riled up. the second that councillor had left she’d burst into this spiel about how you make her feel, how unbearable she finds it having to look at you in those damn clothes and not be able to fuck the living daylights out of you all the time. and all you could do was laugh at her, pulling her in to kiss her gently, pulling her hand to your waist.
which is how you found yourself in this situation. sevika on her knees in front of you, her beautifully carved nose bumping against your clit while she murmurs sweet words into your cunt. her hands gripping at the fat of your thighs, steel eyes meeting yours as your eyelids flutter.
“sevika- at least give me a break- fuck!,” you grip at her hair gently, hips moving against her face as she looks up at you, steel eyes glittering as she looks at your plum red face. she grins cockily at you before continuing, somehow even faster.
it’s impressive to you, how long she’s been doing this. you think it might be crossing the half hour mark, and you��ve already cum twice. you had offered to return the favour but she declined plainly, and you weren’t about to complain.
she stays buried between the fat of your thighs for long enough that you think the bones in your legs are melting, and when she finally comes up for air she seems immensely proud of herself.
after promptly cleaning you up and escorting you back to your place, sevika pauses outside your door and rests a hand on the small of your back. she looks so reluctant to leave that you just laugh, pulling her into your house and immediately wrapping your arms around her neck. she laughs, voice shaky when she speaks.
“so, uhm… what now?”
long story short, you end the night sweaty and bare in your bed, talking about your lives and pasts after the realisation that you don’t really know each other— well, didn’t. you do now, and you think you might love sevika now you do.
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bts of these photos Aemond: ElvenDen Helaena by me
I know that gifs look weirdly cropped, that's because no one was looking how vids were recording, and it's a miracle some bts are salvageble at least as far as heads go. even without the necks. :c
still cute tho. and not-so-cute, the 2nd one will forever be whoa in gif or photo form for me.
My cosplay tags:
Photos, gifs, videos from costests/cos shoots/cons
Inprogresses (costumes, 3d printing etc)
since it's my blog and I can talk at length about anything, here's a story of how I came to ship Helaemond TL;DR: fanarts and actors. & my anti S2 / Condal & Hess musings again. Wasn't planning on venting, but TG treatment still makes me so mad that I can't do one without the other.
Okay so my friend kept telling me her friend looks a lot like Aemond. I've met him once before this costest at the elven photo planner & he really does, but I still wasn't fully prepared for how uncanny it will be in costest. 😹 It's uncanny to be point it's CRAZY especially as up close as in the gifs above. Y'all are not ready for the full cosplay.
ANYWAY. So I sort of started thinking who among HotD characters I could try putting together for a costest for this to make sense. Alicent was out of the question since I don't look like her at all, and with me tending to look younger than I am, it would have looked even weirder than in the show. Eventually, I was choosing between Hel and Alys. I didn't ship Helaemond at the time, and we had no stills of Alys back then, so Hel seemed like an easier choice, plus I had my Dany wig.
And then I realized people actually shipped them, and at first I was like, 'huh'? Since they barely had any scenes and whatnot. Not that the greens had a lot of scenes together even back then. I wasn't particularly in the fandom, too thank god, I wish I could unsee some TB's hot takes. ANYWAY. I genuinely wasn't planning for this costest to be shipping galore at first, because I didn't know this was even a thing. Then I started looking up the fanarts and started to see the appeal. xD No joke, it legit happened when I was looking for references in a span of a few days. Then I saw how Ewan and Phia were hyping them up for S2 and talking about them in S1, and I was fully on board... Only for S2 to turn out to be so underwelming and character assassinating for all the greens blacks too, I really liked Rhaenyra in S1 and it's insane how much of a nothing sandwich she is after S2. By the time we shot the costest right before S2 finale, I had so little hope we'll get anything. Or more like. I knew we still haven't seen the scenes Phia and Ewan were talking about, so I knew we were getting something, just probably something that will simultaneously shit on Aemond and the ship since TG can't have nice things or feel anything but disdain for one another per S2 aside from Alicent and Hel because they aren't male therefore can be nice to each other. And at that point, I was so invested that I'm in my delulu land now, surrounded by my plans to do Helaemond justice in the best way I can. With maybe some side plans to try gathering the whole TG to ya know. Annoy people who hate them even more. xD Jokes aside, I'd really love to do that, I'd love to at least shoot Targtower kids as, you know, not hating each other. Shippery or not, doesn't matter. I'd just really like to do some wholesome green things, but yeah atm we're just Hel, Aemond & Alicent, and tbh I don't think it's possible to find an Aegon over here. I tried reaching out to my friend in another city, but got more of a 'no', than 'yes' answer, so idk where to find Aegon unfortunately.
I might eventually do Alys since my face works for both Hel and Alys & I can pull off one hell of a bitchface I'm actually surprised how I somehow come off so soft as Hel, but I have a feeling the show will make her TB she practically already is, and since Aemond is the eViLeSt person to ever evil in Westeros per Condal & Hess aka the only character making sense amids ongoing war with magic medieval nukes ffs, and doesn't deserve good things... I don't see a universe in which Alysmond will be really inspiring, not fucked up from the get go. I don't trust them. At all. So like. Giant question mark there. Helaemond priority. Fuck this show. Like if I had the resources to, I'd honestly shoot a bunch of scenes, not just photos. Hell, I'd reshoot S2, TB included, lol. But my ass is broke and I'm doing both mine and Aemond's cosplays so. 🤷🏼♀️
'Cause not that they haven't fucked up Helaemond… Or Alicent's relationships with her sons... Every single relationship of the greens went down the drain so fast it's like. The. Fuck? No, seriously, it still enrages me Hel helped Daemon of all people?? And seemed to almost wish Aemond would just drop dead right there. ANYHOW yeah… Yeah. I legit have so many ideas. I love using props and all that, and with her needlework, love for bugs & her overall tragic story (plus the dreamer storyline on the show the show doesn't touch like AT ALL), I want to do so much!
TL;DR again: the fandom made me do it. Just like the fandom made me dislike TB a lot. Or more like, the loudest TB stans with double standarts and zero understanding of how Westeros and people in it should function. And that it's not real world and no one is 'coded' anything related to our world or politics (or at least they shouldn't be no matter how much Condal & Hess try to push contemporary problems into the show to pat themselves on the back).
I realize there are dubious people on both sides of the fandom, but really not even Condal & Hess can make people like or dislike characters as much as their stans can. Oh also, WHY THE FUCK ARE THERE EVEN SIDES. They literally pitted the fandom against each other, it's so sick and twisted and all sorts of fucked up.
Back to Condal & Hess, them trying to sink TG so much made me sympathize even with those on it I didn't care about at first, like Criston, and simultaniosly dislike the Saint-RhaeRhae side and it's vicious vocal part of the fanbase... I even liked Daemyra in S1, but after S2 I don't want to touch anything or anyone related to her with a ten-foot pole. Even tho I still like some characters on TB, they just ruined everyone. To some extent on both sides, but for TG I sort of want to do things in support of them and in spite of Condal & Hess. Thereas for TB... After S1 I was thinking of cosplaying Rhae, but LMAO NO. Just no.
Tagged this with all the anti tags I mention, so don't come at me, I don't have time, and do have a block list. You can argue with the wall or those who want to argue. If you can't disagree with someone & be civil about it, it's not my problem.
#helaemond#aemond targaryen#helaena targaryen#aemond one eye#hotd aemond#prince aemond#helaena the dreamer#queen helaena#hotd#house of the dragon#hotd cosplay#got cosplay#cosplay photos and videos#cosplay posts#hotd critical#anti hotd#anti team black#team green#pro team green#targtowers#anti condal and hess
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Me, in a conversation: What's going on in Gaza is genocide and objectively abhorrent.
Them: Well, ya know the Palestinians *random bullshit justifications for the slaughter of thousands of innocent people*
Me:
#the cons of living in the bible belt#like i already think of every organized religion as a cult#thats so 'sanctity of life' of you#good to know youre cool with mass murder so long as its the enemies of your big guy in the sky#like idk how to tell you this but people tend to just be people#and jesus was brown but i guess you probably dont wanna think about that#its an entire can of worms that i dont have the mental power to sift through#i dont understand how some of the people over here can be so hoity toity on their high horses about their faith and race#then go on to hold such loyalty to a country that gives no shits about them#if theres a higher power i think it would be displeased#if i was the higher power id be pissed to have people killing other people in my name#in my eyes they constantly do their god a disservice#gaza#palestine#free gaza#im not saying that what ive got is even a good take#i admit im not the most well informed on most situations regarding this whole thing#BUT i think human life is important and special in of itself and that its wrong to take that life in most cases#after the Holocaust we said never again yet here we are doing it for the thousandth time#history does always repeat itself#this also isnt to say that youre a bad person if youre practicing some religion#you do you#religion and spirituality are separate for me and religion isn't really my cup of tea any more
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I hate the stretch lines in the front of Curly's uniform because that means the devs rushed to make a model in like a month or so and thought "They gotta at least know he has huge knockers, gotta know he's got back pain." Cause like what is the thematic importance of his tits having overhang?
What responsibility is that representing? Breast reduction? It shows an inherent greed in his character due to the excess and heshouldletmeholdone and that he clearly is blinded cause if he tries to look down his damn ladder all he's seeing is his own cleavage.
#this is my curly slander post ig#disclaimer i need you to understand i see all fictional men i like as like butches Curly is no exception#but like they didnt need to add that many polygons to his chest like its unnessary and honestly a little mean he already has so many things#to handle and you expect him to hold those boys up like that just aint right this is like something so stupid but i know you can tell im#having strong feelings about it cause like what was the point why did they survive the fucking crash it has to be a injoke at this point#with the devs it shouldnt make me this mad im turning into a misandrist but only towards large chested men#mouthwashing#curly mouthwashing#shitpost#suggestive#ig because this is just about his chest but like also they made him objectively pretty for no reason like yeah like ideal man and work ig#but they went over the extra mile like i have a right to be mad they did that much for a model we see canonically for like two seconds its#crazy actually how little we see of curly pre crash because we also lose his physical movements to help characterize him the way we see#body language with the other characters and how it gives way to their struggles and personalities and sentiments in certain moments#like all he does and how he emotes is stifled by the fact we always play as him until the last moments where he takes over to try and save#the ship and crew and even right before that the scene is so wrought with tension we cant tell what that look he gave Jimmy meant due to#the limitations of the models and how stiff Curly is like was it fear acceptance denial we dont know enought about how he acts himself#to tell and then everything else is charaterized by what Jimmy had done to where we dont really just get to see Curly as himself like Anya#and Swansea and Daisuke we have no idea how theyd act in a regular moment outside of a few glimpses and even then it is them doing#their jobs like grrrr we hate an unreliable narrator but also its the fact jimmy clearly does not interact with them or try to outside of#his position as copilot and then captain harkening back to the entire capitlist view of utility and how he views all of them as useless eve#Curly which fandom tangent the fandom also tends to do to Curly as they base every trait on what they think he failed to do as Captain#between Jimmy and Anya when the QnAs kinda make him out to be a rather open and willing person but still someone who isnt like a push over#just thinking of QnA three where it mentions hes very open to trying new things and you need to be an open minded person to open urself up#to failure like that and ig this is just the weird view that Curly needs to learn that or that theres redemption he needs personality wise#verses healing and learning from trauma like idk its the idea that people assume he did abosultely nothing when the games points out direct#and throught parallels he was taking actions its just wasnt enough and an over focus on absolute inaction vs ineffective methods used to#tackle the issues and themes the game grapples with plus wanting someone to take the blame and have to make it up to Anya even tho#i think it would mean nothing from Curly because she saw his efforts and would be disappointed it wasnt enough but the idea she would#disregard the attempts or not acknoweldge Jimmy as the epicenter compared ot Curly is weird and too focused on someone
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negative connotations to Arabic phrase ‘God is Great’ incorrect. average praying Muslim does takbir (says Allahu Akbar) a minimum 95 times a day and should have been counted.
#minimum#like MIMIMUM.#each day#like that’s just for the 5 prayers#only the obligatory ones it doesn’t include the additional voluntary ones most people also tend to do at some point#it doesn’t include regular use of the phrase in conversation#the phrase is literally used as an exclamation#like if you say ‘Allahu akbar my shift is over! I can go home alhumdulilah!’#like I don’t know what to tell you#western news-media connotations are so weird#you literally yell takbir to celebrate as well#saw a thing where everyone did takbir every time someone donated a huge amount to charity like brooooooooo#people be laughing so hard and getting Allahuakbar Allahuakbar out while wheezing#you score a goal? Allahu akbar alhumdulilah#this is very normal culturally transmitted info#Christian Arabs use the phrase as well like it's Arabic come on western media you’re not even trying#it’s such a joke#95 doesn't even include the 2 calls to prayer#it doesn't count people who do the extra allahu akbar (x33) after each prayer#doesn't include anything recited before bed#like. these are not uncommon things people choose to do. like...... BRO???#if you've ever seen Muslims praying in a group the person leading the prayer does the takbir out loud. that's literally how it's done#there are like 7 or 5 'Allahu akbar's in each round of prayer#you can't NOT say that part out loud it's literally THE part that has to be said out loud in each prayer#this information is very available online#you can say it before doing anything idk why it became a big deal in the west especially#it's some strange xenophobic Islamophobic normalise killings in those regions of the world mix#I’ve been getting recommended so many Arabic anime edits idk what to tell you#call everyone habibi it’s good for you#one of the most popular world languages fr
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who up seeing their disorder in a fictional character but feel like its not their place to put a name on it
#id have to be waterboarded before i can talk abt how i see a lot of my adhd and personality in mitsumi iwakura let alone post it#idk how to talk abt this without feeling like im talking over or invalidating ppls experiences relating with a character#someone was talking abt how ppl tie laios' autism to special interest and social difficulties but not much else which kinda flattens it#and then went into a respectful in depth analysis of other autistic behaviour that laios exhibits and it wasnt phrased meanly#its fascinating and important to me to hear someone explain a little bit abt traits that they recognized and often go overlooked#because it does help me learn more about it. but i think thats also where hesitancy kicks in when it comes to depicting it accurately#like i have adhd and some of my adhd symptoms overlap with autism (time blindness and pattern seeking behaviour) but that only means#it feels familiar to me even without having autism. on top of that traits arent always cleanly determined as being /caused/ by#a disorder. to understand my environment i compare it to something unrelated but similar to make it more familiar and for the longest time#i thought that was a personality thing and not an information processing thing since i loved playing pretend in my head as a kid#so if you make a character who experiences that hoping to reach people that also experience that and tell them its not weird or#smth youre making up like. thats the goal. ppl who dont get it arent expected to it just means it doesnt cater to them but it helps them#become familiar to it yk? since i dont have autism myself i dont feel confident i can depict it properly or explain it in my own words#but that doesnt mean im trying to dismiss it or try and cut it out completely.. ill just leave the floor open to someone who /can/#a lot of issues around fanon depictions are when smth is baselessly popularized or a characters personality and behavior is flattened#especially to fit them into a trending meme. its harmless and its supposed to be for fun but it gets tricky when you drag things that#need to be carefully explained beforehand or else it gets lost in translation. like that tweet abt 'hyperfixating' on cooking pasta#once it becomes popular language usually the original meaning is left out for the sake of simplifying it for everyone that when it#circles back theres a sort of hesitancy like. am i using it the way it was intended or am i unknowingly using the popularized version of it#actually thats probably why i felt wrongfooted during diagnosis bc it felt like i was misusing the words i heard to describe what i felt#i /know/ i see a lot of myself in mitsumi because our minds are always somewhere else and we tend to put good faith first and for me#that personal connection is enough. but idk it feels like its always gonna have to be 'palatable' first before i can talk abt it openly#mad respect to writers and creators who stick to their story even if theres the looming fear of ppl misinterpreting it and letting them#have it.. its been almost 2 weeks and i am so close to deleting that m3 dunmeshi drawing bc ppl keep saying chilchuck wouldnt have 200 HP#IT LITERALLY SAYS I MADE IT WHILE WATCHING EP 1. I USED EARTHBOUND LOGIC AND I WASNT EVEN TAKING IT SERIOUSLY CHILL#yapping
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Some people are very good at talking to a group and creating an environment where all of them feel very welcome and proactively making sure people are included in all aspects of the conversation and then some people talk to a group as if they are trying to keep everyone divided? Like they are using inside jokes that only one person understands or talk in a guarded way that suggests they are everyone's closest confidant but no one else is allowed to know each other. No real point, I'm just thinking about how much I would rather be the first type of person but how much more common I think the second is
#bean talks#this isn't @ anything that is happening now or has happened recently#i was just thinking about a friend I havent talked to in years and how good she was at this kind of thing?#she'd get everyone in a discussion together and yeah maybe there would be something shed bring up that I wouldnt understand#but shed always turn to the people who didnt know and be like 'oh joe played pippin in our high school production btw'#it was just so nice and especially when i was the new friend it really made me feel welcomed and included#plus it just made it easier to talk to the other people because shed just be like#'omg you should tell bren your quantum joke. theyre studying physics and have so-and-so professor right now'#like it just took away so much tension and gave people a starting point#whereas now i feel like i walk into conversations as the person who doesnt know things and isnt allowed to know things#and maybe this is just my perception but i feel like younger people tend to be the worst about this?#like it seems as though younger people want to be viewed as 'in the know' with everyone by keeping others out ?#i'm sure that's not just a older/younger thing#it's probably very different for people who view themselves as more extroverted vs introverted#and just a general maturity level#but yeah idk i was just thinking i wanted to be better about that ahh
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gonna take a little hiatus just to clear my head & let myself process emotions. i never can stick to these hiatuses but… i’m just so angry & betrayed about all that’s happened over the past few days. plus i just don’t want to clog the dash with my anger about all this. i feel like i’ve done it enough already.
discord below the cut & feel free to plot or message me any time. <3
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#— how will you hear my words and pleas; ooc / psa.#like this shit fucking hurt. emotionally. trust-wise. idk if people are getting told/etc.#or even if people are gonna think i’m one now and who i can even trust to tell jewish stuff without getting fucking politically branded#i don’t trust drama to Not get out of hand by someone. even if it’s originally very little.#just. paranoid. shit like this never tends to end well.
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I finally saw the mean girls musical (the movie one) I have so many fucking thoughts oh my god
#thoughts#oni talks#mean girls 2024#I think I may be the only person to kind of like it? like don’t get me wrong it is kinda ROUGH but it has so much potential and there’s bits#and pieces that I actually really enjoy or wish they had more of or just aahh#I’ve been nonstop thinking about the ideal version in my head like there’s so much potential obviously I’m biased by like a lot#since for one I know I tend to like stuff other people hate or don’t like but for two this sequel was weirdly way more relatable so maybe#I’m just projecting from my own personal experiences but Idc the POTENTIAL THERES SO MUCH ID WANNA DO INSTEAD#like there’s so many little details and characterizations that I wish was expanded on or fleshed out and it’s just like it feels like either#half baked or that it’s gone through too many edits it’s like it’s scared to exist?? like there’s some differences I love and wish they lol#leaned into but it’s like it was terrified to be too different? or like they were rushing the end especially#like in my ideal form it’s a tv show coz I think they honestly have enough that could be genuinely expanded in a way more interesting way#via that format probably not like a super extended series like you COULD but you’d definitely need more expansion but I could see the potent#but like idk one SOLID musical season with expanded character story and not like one of those rush cram shows like a good solid one#like Regina’s characterization is so fascinating but also feels like slightly off and like they could’ve leaned way more into things?#like I think keeping Regina as a closeted lesbian gives the greatest potential and interest for an expanded story#like I loved maybe the first half of the movie the most like that one song she sang to manipulate Aaron would work so much more perfectly if#she’s singing it about/to Cady? I also think in my ideal brain an cool flashback episode for Janis and Regina would be so cool coz there’s#so much you could flesh out in a flashback than you could in a retelling which while I do like the retelling since it lets you imagine thing#I just! potential! I also want more of them interacting and I do think changing Janis to be a lesbian works if they leaned more into it?#I also think in my ideal form janis would have more comeuppance or acknowledgement of her shit? I also think an arc of Regina coming out#like one thing they missed from the original is Regina playing soccer at the end & I think they could hint more towards that and maybe lean#more into her at home life in an expanded story way coz her mom is clearly like… yikes. granted maybe some of my views on the movie are too#biased by personal experience but like the way she snaps at her mom usually in my experience isn’t out of nowhere? like parents behind#closed doors. or frustrations with what her mom has clearly been putting on her the way she tells her mom not to talk about her body is very#like idk a lot of the characters in this version feel more real to me bc they act really similar to people I know irl so the expanded story#could be cool. another one that in my ideal brain would have more is Gretchen and especially her relationships with Regina as well as with#that one guy and her parents I wanna see more of how that works and her arc to feel more meaningful when she dumps him & mentions family#also as much as I didn’t care much for the straight plot stuff there’s 100% missed potential there that I could see in the differences like#iirc in the original it’s regular algebra not AP calc which I think could’ve been used as an interesting characterization opportunity for
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Sometimes I worry that I might actually be faking the whole not a lot of gender except a sprinkle of guy on top thing, and then i am aggressively gendered as a cis woman in day-to-day life and remember why i don't go out much.
#it's nothing new#i'm USED to it#it's just annoying#people are nice to me and all of that and i like going out and talking to people#but realizing that they perceive me as a woman and interact through that lens and say things about feminity and such and i'm like#no i do not know what makes a hat feminine or masculine. it is a hat#unless it is Very Clearly one way or the other i Do Not See It#no i can't quite tell if my own personal style is one or the other. i'm not really either and i like being a blob.#Yes i know how to dress well and prettily that makes me look very good#but for some reason i dislike it being complimented on by other people than my partner my close friends and my family#because when it's other people it tends to be 'oh you're dressing so feminine today it looks so good on you!' and thanks but#that's. not part of why i'm dressing like this today i just wanted to look hot#idk#is it weird ?#is it overthinking ?#it probably is#something something stop gendering me
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The day people realize treating trans people as a whole like perfect angels who can never do any wrong is also a form of dehumanization is the day I can rest easy
#like. idk how to tell you trans people are literally just people#theres trans people i love and trans people i do not want to hang around. because of how they are as people#i feel like a lot of these issues come from cis allies completely misunderstanding what we mean#and being the majority their voices tend to speak over ours#ie being like “support trans people as a whole” and they think it means “never dislike a trans person or call them out for being shitty”#when really it means “support progress for all of us even if that includes the trans people you dont like personally”#idk theres a lot of nuance to these subjects#and i keep seeing a lot more kneejerk reactions to. literally anything discussing trans people#like in every direction. lack of nuance is causing a lot of infighting#and a lot of us trans people seem to internalize what cis people say as a need for validation even if they dont realize it#vinny rambles
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you know if so many people have to constantly explain what tone indicators are maybe they're not actually as effective as people think they are
#i read a pst about it once that said basically that typing the whole thing out at the end of the day was better#like saying hey genuine question what does this mean#instead of what does this mean / whatever indicator you put#because not gonna lie! i still get confused if /g means genuine or general#which again makes tone indicators not as effective lmao#idk maybe i'm just a boomer but fully typing out what you mean tends to be better at the end of the day#leaves less room for speculation and misunderstandments#and confusion LMAO also a lot of the times starting your sentence with how you're saying it makes it better#especially for people that are anxious and can't tell apart tones online#just a thought#b.txt
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#mod posts#idk dude i am so conflicted abt this ‘barnaby is overrated’ shit#on one hand im like… wow another person who feels he’s overrated. daring today are we?#on the other im like… i understand what its like when the character you like isnt the popular one in the community#like i normally tend to hyperfixate on the side characters so i absolutely know how frustrating it is#i also know from personal experience that a lot of it can just be hating it solely BECAUSE its popular#when i was like 14 and undertale came out i hated it just bc it was popular. and then i played it myself and yknow what? i enjoyed it#like… its okay not to like something!! everyone has unique tastes#and i also understand the concern abt barnaby being treated like snatcher (i know NOTHING abt snatcher so dont. quote me on that)#like theres a chance the ‘fanon’ version of barnaby will be given precedence over ‘canon’#the same shit happened with sans. remember all those sans/reader fics where sans was this edgy mysterious guy?#yet in fanon hes just a funni little skeleton who likes bad jokes?#yet in *canon jesus christ i cant spell today#but like. can we just let people enjoy things if they arent hurting anyone?#like i get it its annoying sometimes. like i had to mute the oc tag bc i was tired of seeing RP stuff#but im not like. going into their inboxes and telling them theyre bad ppl for enjoying a popular character yknow?#sorry this is making like. no sense. and im sorry to put it in tags but i do NOT want this spreading#anyways. those are my thoughts for today.
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People are so weird to trans people. Like beyond being straight forward dickheads, transphobes are just so weird
#even some people who arent necessarily malicious but maybe just ignorant tend to be so weird#i just saw a post from a lesbian (presumably a terf) complaining about trans woman#because 'i like woman. how am i expected to be attracted to trans woman if no look like woman??? hmm?'#maybe this is also just hard for me to understand as an asexual person trying to understand allosexual people but#but like wtf? idk who is demanding you to be attracted to ALL women but it certainly isnt me#you can be a lesbian who doesnt like all women...? some women is plenty tbh#you dont have to tear apart another persons (an entire demographics-woth of people actually) self esteem#to have the sexuality that you have#as a trans person who isnt cis passing i can tell you. we KNOW. We KNOW we dont look cis to you#you do not have to remind us that our bodies dont fit into your culturally conceptualized ideals for gender#it also gets really fucking exhausting to constantly hear people talking about something fundamental to me#as some sort of compromise at best#its something i can relate to with my asexuality too#either love me for who i am or leave me the hell alone
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being the only fan of something is so great because i am the sole ruler of this kingdom. no one is around to tell me my headcanons suck or that all the characters are ooc
however it also sucks because i am the only fan. no one is around to support my headcanons or tell me they love my portrayal of the characters
#in a way i'm really glad there's no celceta fans. i don't think i could take meeting another person who knows the game#building your house out of donuts and all that#same with zestiria i'm very glad there's no one around to tell me how ooc sorey is in my mind palace or any of that#but god it would be nice to have a friend to bounce ideas off of once in a while. get some positive reinforcement in this echo chamber#of mine#altho the thing is i don't really have these kinds of elaborate aus and stories and headcanons for stuff with an actual fandom.#i love psychonauts with all my heart but the simple fact that there are other people who enjoy it just makes me feel shyer or smth#like i know that these people have played the games a million times more than i have and are a million times more obsessed with the charact#characters than i am so why should i bother developing my own headcanons abt these characters when there are people out there who do it muc#much better than i ever could. so why bother at all you know#that's why i tend to be a passive enjoyer of most things i care about on here#i'm not out here giving complex and unique takes on psychonauts or mario plots or characters#i'm just gonna enjoy what's presented to me by people who are cooler than me#and when i do have original thoughts it's only gonna be about stuff nobody else gives a flying fuck about. like tales or ys or tok#which is kind of sad! i'm not gonna lie!#but i guess i do this to myself huh. if i managed to find an ys fan they'd probably scare me out of my own theories#idk man. theres not really a solution is there#wyvern rambles
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does anyone else feel like they could be a really really good tour guide if the memory problems didnt exist
#LISTEN. LISTEN I COULD RAMBLE TO YOU FOREVER ABOUT MY CITY. I REALLY COULD#BUT MY MEMORY IS ASS AND I KNOW I WOULD END HALF OF MY SENTENCES WITH 'BUT THATS JUST ME' 😭😭#i would hate myself for misremembering something and passing on that information. and even more embarrassed if someone corrected me in fron#of a group of people.. i mean i guess its not realistic to know everything about everything but still a little embarrassing#but like seriously.. i could tell you about the weird public art sculptures. i could tell you about the local cryptid sighting from the 70s#i could tell you about the weather and public transportation system. i could tell you about the weird underground walkway#pretend im grabbing you by the shoulders and shaking you back and forth because i would have so much fun doing that. UGH#on a similar note its also really fun to go through atlas obscura and wonder how tf some of these dont get more attention. like i get that#popular attractions would be more worthwhile. i tend to go for museums and aquariums whenever im visiting somewhere#but idk i think it would be cool to chill in an abandoned train station or popular skate park. shrugs#i seriously need to get out more. sigh#i showed crow pictures of it snowing hard this morning and they were flabbergasted that its like -5 degrees here lol#yapping#txt
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