#a disorder. to understand my environment i compare it to something unrelated but similar to make it more familiar and for the longest time

[puppppppppy]

who up seeing their disorder in a fictional character but feel like its not their place to put a name on it

[desire-mona]

sending you this ask because i'm personally trying to stay away from the mouthwashing fandom even though i liked the game, but i want to talk abt it - does it make you feel weird too how often fanart makes jimmy so much darker-skinned than other characters? i've seen him drawn even darker than daisuke. especially when it's him and curly next to eachother i see a lot of weird racial implications in curly being very light skinned and blonde and such and standing next to jimmy who is the villain and is drawn unkempt, tan-skinned and dark-haired. i know some of it comes from their models themselves but i've seen it exaggerated to the point where it makes me rlly uncomfortable, especially as a native person who's even an SA survivor. like having darker skin doesn't make you more evil, jimmy's a bad guy because of what he did. and ik curly is designed that way because he's like the "perfect model guy" who's actually not perfect and fucked up a lot! there's a lot behind the design choices at play of course. it just kind of makes me uncomfortable how exaggerated people make it in fanart, to the degree where i think most don't even realize they're creating racial bias. what are your thoughts?

in the interest of not attracting mw discourse to a non mw discourse blog, this is more than likely my only post like this, but id be happy to discuss more off anon if youd like :3

i honestly cant say that this is something ive seen myself, whether it be due to just not seeing fanart like that or my likeliness to connect those dots, but it really doesnt at all shock me that that'd be something going on. quite honestly my interpretation of unkempt appearances in fanart was based off a toxic masculinity-esque headcanon (ex self care, grooming, and appearance being seen as typically "feminine"), but that combined with skin colour can definitely raise some eyebrows. as you said, i dont really think this lies in any conscious racial bias. and i obviously dont know these people, but id be willing to bet it boils down to "i think he'd look better tanned" without giving much thought to how that translates to his role in the game.

jimmy's appearance in relation to curly's is something i think of quite a lot quite honestly, and as you said a lot of it lies in their relationship in game. in terms of skin tone though, the difference really isnt all that big

a good natured skin tone change is a REALLY unfortunate combination with people's unwillingness to analyse jimmy's motivations as much as curly's, writing it off as "because he's crazy" or whatever else (which brings ableism into the question but thats a different conversation.) compared to curly, often seen with a pretty unchanged design, who is mostly seen as someone who has a good heart and strong leadership skills, who made a misguided decision which ended up being unintentionally catastrophic. this ends up being dramaticised, as you sorta said, into a standard (albeit unintentional) good v evil dynamic, which is obviously tremendously boiled down compared to the motivations or decisions of both jimmy and curly.

(also also this isnt meant to say jimmy is entirely the product of his environment, he made did shitty and dangerous shit on his own terms. i just think its irresponsible to completely write off his environment/ life leading up to the game as something entirely unrelated. boiling his actions down to just "because he's fucked up" ultimately ends up taking away from the humanity of people with similar mental disorders, painting them as dangerous. again, different and very nuanced conversation i dont really have the right words for.)

like i said, very unfortunate combination of (what i would think to be) a well meaning design change and a lack of understanding of the nuance of jimmy's character and motivations. which is, of course, something you're more than likely well aware of.

this doesnt take away from your point tho, objectively people are in fact still making the violent + dangerous man darker skinned while leaving the "nicer" one the same. this is certainly not the first example ive seen in fandoms ive been in (looking at you danganronpa + genshin) and more than likely wont be the last. its tough to bring up the topic to people who do something like this, as it seems so innocuous at first glance (see: me not even seeing something like this at first), and id imagine people would be quick to be pretty defensive seeing as, again, they more than likely didnt mean anything by it. pointing out unconscious biases like this can lead people to think you're accusing them of something, which is almost never the case. typical situation of becoming defensive when racist behaviour gets pointed out, relying on them not being *a* racist, which ive admittedly done myself at one point or another.

and to get this out of the way, give jimmy whatever skin tone and appearance you like, you can do what you want. i just think you should also take into consideration what message is being sent if jimmy, the "monstrous" character, is the only character you make darker skinned and unkempt.

this is very messy and honestly very presumptuous of people's intentions and such, but you can understand my main idea. im really glad you're interested in my thoughts on this n wanted to hear what i had to say btw :3

[lilybaud]

So I'm curious what oppression do asexual people face? I do understand there are some minor discrimination similar to homosexuality like being told it's a phase, but there have 0 laws against i, very few if any deaths because of it, few forced marriages. Maybe there have been cases of corrective rape?

sorry i took a few days to answer this -- i wanted time to give you a thoughtful response! this is kinda a version of an ask i answered last month, but i hope it helps answer your question!

here are some good posts that explain better than me:

https://livebloggingmydescentintomadness.tumblr.com/post/148453657895/the-aphobia-masterpost (This one goes into ace history, as well as many other topics – big recommend)

https://newt–x.tumblr.com/post/183606679191/a-spec-people-dont-experience-oppression (includes more comments/edits on the above)

So how are aces oppressed?

Let’s start with medical discrimmination: asexuality is classified as a mental disorder that you can get diagnosed with.  Although the DSM-5 says that asexuality is a valid identity, it still lists hypoactive sexual disorder as – well, a disorder.  This is basically defined as when someone is disinterested in sexual activity, and this disinterest causes them distress.  This is the same boat that homosexuality was in until a few decades ago – and obviously, aphobia (and homophobia) are very likely to make people feel “distressed” about their sexual identity (I know that I do!)  Imagine going to a psychiatrist and having them tell you that your orientation is a disorder that needs to be fixed: not great.

Even when ace people are not being explicitly diagnosed with Being an Asexual Disease, asexuals can often get into hostile medical situations, particularly in mental health settings.  I have had several appointments with psychiatrists, counselors, and the like that were meant to be about unrelated topics, but when it came out that I was ace, the conversation turned to why this was a sign of isolation/pathology/other fuckedupedness.  Other aces might be able to better speak about their experiences in this area, as I often avoid bringing up the topic in medical settings for this reason.

the discrimmination you’re talking about

Asexual people, particularly (but not only) female-identifying aces, have also long (long!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!) been targets of corrective rape and sexual assault. Here’s a good (altho far from exhaustive) HuffPost article on the subject.  Corrective rape is a huge issue.  This is a very prevalent fear for a lot of ace people, who also face other types of violence.  A really horrible and tragic example is the murder of ace teen Bianca Devins last year by a man that she refused to sleep with (I won’t post links because they’re pretty upsetting) -- a death that aphobes online are still making terrifying comments about.

So yes! Ace ppl do actually face violence and death!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here’s a post that talks about why it’s hard to be an ace PoC (like me!)

Tl;dr, many people don’t know what asexuality is – it’s sometimes called an “invisible identity.”  But that doesn’t mean ace people aren’t discrimminated against as aces.

Exclusion from the LGBTQIA+ community

As I’m sure you know, many fellow people in the queer community hate ace people.  There’s a perception that ace people are being special snowflakes, that we are basically straight, that we are not oppressed enough to be part of the community, that we diminish the importance of other sexual orientations, and on and on.  This is really hard for ace people, because we seek queer spaces, spaces that are supposed to be safe for marginalized identities, are often those that are most explicitly anti-ace.  

In addition, some in the queer community used to identify as ace because they had internalized homophobia or other things, and view asexuality as a cover for those feelings based on their own experiences.

From queer tumblr bloggers I follow to comments by queer friends and acquaintances, I’ve personally had spaces that I thought were safe revealed to be aphobic.  That’s a pretty upsetting experience – I don’t talk about being ace very often, but it’s devastating to know that people you encounter in your everyday life spend so much time thinking about how much they hate people like you.

All this leads to many ace people being scared and unhappy.  In a UK government survey of LGBTQIA+ individuals, asexuals were the group least likely to be “open” about their identity (at 89% reporting that they were not open).  Cis aces were the least comfortable being queer in the UK, and had the lowest life satisfaction scores, out of all cis responders (the survey did not break down the responses of trans responders into allo/ace).

(Side note – many ace people emphasize other parts of their identities in order to participate in queer spaces.  For example, if pressed in a pride group or seminar or friendly gathering or etc., I might just say I’m bi.  This sucks too!  All parts of your identity are legitimate and that should go without saying?)

Personally, there are few environments where I am comfortable with people knowing that I am ace.  I don’t wear obvious pride gear, and I don’t call myself ace when I’m in LGBT+ groups.  I’ve never come out to a romantic or sexual partner as ace.  My sexual experiences have been highly traumatizing in part because of my identity.  Only a few of my closest friends know that I’m ace.  The negative perceptions of ace people, particularly those in the queer community, are main causes of this.

Why do we need to be oppressed to be let in?

One of exclusionists’ favorite sticking points is that aces aren’t oppressed enough to be part of the queer community.  We do face discrimination in major ways – see above.  But this raises a question: why do we have to be oppressed to be welcomed into LGBTQIA+ spaces?  What qualifies as oppression?  Is societal oppression “enough,” or does every ace person have to be personally subjected to a hate crime?  I’m not sure if this line of thought comes from a genuine belief that society has to personally take a shit in your bed every day for you to even think about feeling comfortable in queer spaces, or if it is just cover for an instinctive dislike of ace people.  Regardless, it’s something to think about.  To quote the first masterpost linked at top:

“Nobody is trying to say that asexuals have it “as bad” or worse than gay or trans people, but we don’t HAVE to “have it worse” to be included and for our experiences to have merit without being compared to anyone else’s. Let me say that again: our experiences have merit without being compared to anyone else’s. “

Anyway thanks for your question!  I don’t know if this helps or changes your mind on the topic.  Please reach out if you have any other questions about my experiences as an ace person!