#it would be more interesting if she died
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Empress and her Bodyguard.
(OCs, grey haired lady Zaphira she/her, demon Shargon he/they)
(also some details up close)
and this guy bc i find him funny
#ganondoodles#art#digital art#painting#artists on tumblr#ocs#original character#look i had to call it quits at some point#so if i waited anylonger to post it in whatever form of finished it was i would have lost interest and would never have posted it so#here it is#also you guys get more info#zaphira is the empress of the largest land in this world and conquered most of it in her youth#she used to be obsessed with war bc she wanted to prove herself to be the strongest ruler there was after the violent death of her-#adopted parents#she grew to see that that isnt the way in part bc of her lover at that time who was a general in her army#but she died in that battle and since then zaphira has been trying to rebuild whatever she destroyed and give back what she can#but she is still very hated and couldnt leave her palace for the longest time bc of assassins until she heard of a demon lurking around#and sought him out to be her bodyguard bc who would dare attack her when shes got a demon at her side#this is her arriving at the palace of another country whos leader challegned her to a fist fight bc he thought shes frail and old#(its an assassination attempt- she knows that)
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So I've been thinking lately about how Mithrun is Kabru's dark mirror (more on that another time- it needs its own post), and I thought it interesting that one of their parallels is that they were both cared for by Milsiril, but in opposite directions. She took Kabru in as her foster after he was orphaned and tried to convince him not to become an adventurer. On the flip side, she helped rehabilitate Mithrun specifically so that he could rejoin the Canaries.
And I kept wondering: why?
For Kabru, obviously she loves him a whole lot- despite any other shortcomings in their relationship, I do believe that.
So I get why she tries to convince him not to go dungeoning, and, failing that, at least prepares him as thoroughly as she can.
But why help Mithrun? She used to hate Mithrun, but after realizing what a secretly twisted person he was, she actually thought of him more positively (oh, Milsiril). So it wasn't as if she held the kind of grudge that might motivate her to make his already-depleted life even more miserable by sending him back to the dungeons. And it wasn't that she felt bad for him either, since she didn't visit Mithrun for the first ~20 years of his recovery.
The Adventurer's Bible says that Utaya was the impetus for Mithrun returning to the Canaries, but Milsiril is the one who made the trip to see him and tell him about it.
Why would Milsiril work so hard to get her old coworker back into fighting fit? Why encourage him to return to such a dangerous lifestyle, when she was the one who chose not to mercy-kill him?
That last panel is such a crazy thing to hint at and then never elaborate on. Without it we could have just thought that Milsiril wanted the Canaries' work to continue without her, even if it seemed out of character. I think some people even assume she's just a natural caretaker as a foster mom and handwave it to include nursing Mithrun too. What could Milsiril's suspicious motives be? What does she gain from Mithrun joining the Canaries that isn't an altruistic desire to see dungeons safely sealed? Feeling a sense of responsibility for the work she left behind isn't an ulterior motive.
My theory is: Milsiril, knowing that Mithrun was empty save for the burning desire to face the demon again, wound him up like a clockwork doll and pointed him back at the dungeons.
Hoping that he'd eliminate the biggest threat to Kabru's life, before it was too late for him.
Milsiril the puppetmaster.
#Mithrun#Milsiril#Kabru#btw I'm working with the only translations I could find sorry#so keep that in mind#like it just seemed WEIRD to me#that gloomy introverted Milsiril#who left the life of a Canary behind#decided to do this Canary-adjacent work of helping this guy#maybe the queen made her do it because so many people died and they needed more Canaries idk!#but why would anyone pick Milsiril as a life coach? I really think it was her own choice#it's so interesting how we get these hints of a downright sinster Milsiril#I really like the complicated relationship she and Kabru have#struggling to fully humanize him from her elven perspective#but still taking him seriously wrt: his fears over being a monster or his desire to go to a party!#crazy stuff there#everything about Kabru and adjacent to Kabru is insane what a character
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Call that a Cave Story.
[First] Prev <–-> Next
#poorly drawn mdzs#mdzs#wen chao#wang lingjiao#mianmian#wei wuxian#jiang cheng#I had to cut the comic with JC 'holding WWX back from fighting the Wen Assholes' but it is with me in spirit.#It reads (to me) a little bit like JC is scared of Core Melting Hand and wants to have an excuse to hold on to WWX for comfort.#As far as I can recall they are around 15-17 in this arc.#And a guy who can rip out your golden core? The thing we know JC truly puts so much weight upon that he feels meaningless without it?#Yeah that's pretty terrifying. I hope WWX hugs back (he will not)#I have a lot more thoughts on Wang Lingjiao and Mianmian but I will keep them for later.#WLJ is a character I feel got done a little dirty because she has a ton of interesting potential that gets pushed aside for Mean Villainess#Let's be fully honest. Wen Chao and Wang Lingjiao are *THE* characters the Protag of one of those 'Reincarnated as the villain!' stories#Set up to be assholes to the main character and meeting a horrible end in retribution.#Do you think MXTX thought about that? How Wen Chao is basically the original Shen QiugQiu?#Who's going to be the brave soul who writes A transmigrator in wen chao's body (accidently makes wwx fall in love with him) story?#Though If we are going with “any mxtx character sho dies transmigrates to another book” WHO is the transmigrator?#Hear me out. I think it should be Original Liu Qingge. I think he and wwx would make a funny duo and I want to see it so bad.#AND the contrast of womanizer Wen Chao VS 'What is a woman' LQG.
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Jaiden: Cucurucho, you have a lot of power, right?
Cucurucho: ...I don't know. Maybe.
Roier: Ah... Yes, you know, don't act like a dumbass, you have it. You have it, man. Eh?
Jaiden: Is there a way for us to protect all the Eggs? Do you know? I don't want anything to happen to the Eggs that happened to Bobby.
Cucurucho: Ha ha ha
Roier: WHAT? [Smacks Cucurucho]
Jaiden: [Bops him] Headpats.
Cucurucho: Maybe.
Jaiden: [Continues to bop him] Headpats. C'mon, I can get it out of you! Headpats! Chin scratches! Belly rubs!
Roier: [Joins Jaiden in bopping Cucurucho, chuckling and laughs]
Jaiden: Yeah? He's comin' around!
[Jaiden and Roier both laugh]
#Jaiden Animations#Roier#Cucurucho#QSMP#Jaiden#Animations Family#There is. So much I could say about these three#and so much I could say about their relationship / interactions with Cucurucho and Osito Bimbo#Cards on the table... I really would have loved it if Cucurucho / Osito genuinely cared about Jaiden#I mean I know they DID care about her to some extent that much is clear#But they / the Federation were also ABSOLUTELY using her. I'm not arguing that they weren't#But how could anyone not be charmed by Jaiden? The boba the tea parties the head pats–#The empathy and kindness and everything that made q!Jaiden who she was–#Cucurucho and Osito were tools of the Federation but I do want to believe they cared about Jaiden. Albeit in their own fricked up way#I dunno. I know this sounds like massive copium probably but I watched all of her and Roier's streams interacting with them#and I personally think that conflict and duality makes for a more interesting story#But that's just me and my own personal biases. I dunno how to properly put it into words but I am cradling them all close to my heart#I loved Cucurucho / Osito and I thought they were interesting and I'm SO SAD we'll never know what Jaiden did for them in the past#Anyways. For anyone who's read this far into my rant– you know how Cucurucho saved the Eggs and Jaiden said she died in Purgatory?#I like imagining that she survived the bomb and wound up finding the Eggs in the aftermath#and she helped them survive until Cucurucho found them#I imagine that Jaiden was the reason they were able to escape from the Island / The Watcher / ElQuackity#She stayed behind to slow down their pursuers. And Cucurucho rescuing all the Eggs fulfilled his agreement with Jaiden—#A promise to protect the Eggs#Like I said a lot of this is copium but that's what I like imagining#TLDR: Cucurucho / Osito did care about her in a weird way but that doesn't mean they weren't manipulating her#May 31 2023#Idk man I got a lot of emotions about q!Jaiden#Roier too but I feel like I've done way more analysis posts about him and Cucurucho. Jaiden needs time in the spotlight#Anyways there's my monthly tag rant
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Bungou Stray Dogs: Dead Apple and how “ability users” (opposite to “normal people”) learning to accept themselves through the acceptance of their own abilities is a queer metaphor of acceptance of own's sexual orientation and gender: an essay by me
#bsd#bungou stray dogs#About: Dead Apple. Watched this a while ago with a friend and it was a lot of fun!!!#If you're reading this: thank you so much for hanging out with me I had such a good time (ㅅ´ ˘ )♡#Next to general considerations: wow they were right that Bungou Stray Dogs movie sure can Bungou Stray Dogs#It's always nice to see the detailed animation and elaborate backgrounds of movies. The animation quality compared to the manga is–#definitely noticeable and it's nice to see. That said... I still like the season 2 art style more? And I'm speaking strictly of art style.#The s2 one looks more soft and smooth while the da one is so much more rough.#The plot is... Very bsd-esque I don't think there's anything to add.#In my opinion Kyouka's arc is the one that turned out best tbh. I really like her narrative development and personal growth in this movie.#I like the complexity of her state of mind. how full of contradiction she is. I especially appreciate the recurring small changes of–#expression that indicate how she thinks differently from Atsushi even if she doesn't voice them. The fight between her cynicism and her–#kind nature. It's all very interesting.#Atsushi's development is interesting too. Although all the open questions about his ability we still have kind of leave me frustrated#I don't feel very strongly about Akutagawa in this movie? I mean‚ he's there. The ss/kk scenes are always great and in character and a joy–#to witness no matter what they do. He just doesn't shine particularly? Or at least personally I dont find the “proving my strength against–#myself” narrative arc to be particularly interesting. Imo it was a lot better flashed out in the da stage play! With the complexity that–#the dialogues with Chuuya added to the character. Dazai attacking him. And especially Aktgw understanding that Rashomon wasn't testing Aktg#but rather only expressing that unstoppable rage that is also Aktgw's own. About that I checked out the play and I really liked it!!#I only watched highlights (aka: ss/kk and chuu/aku scenes) but there's some stuff I really like. I like the conflict between Aktgw and–#Chuuya and how Chuuya messes up with Aktgw at first maliciously and then amiably. It's interesting how Atsushi himself observes that Kyouka#and Akutagawa get along. And especially the sskk almost-handholding and Atsushi saying Akutagawa has a nice profile were cute akjdhbsawhjb#Next. Da really is shipping paradise (╥﹏╥) Sorry but... It is. oda/zai. daz/atsu. ss/kk. s/kk. fuku/mori. chuu/aku. It really has everythin#and the moments are so good!!!! What else. Wish we'd see more of Tsujimura. And Christie. And women in general tbh.#Also‚‚‚‚‚ Atsushi's tiger form in this movie is ATROCIOUS. I've said it before but it's crazy how a franchises that relies so heavily on–#fanservice came up with something this hideous. Man the movie overall was pretty but Atsushi sure wasn't. Firmly stand by the belief–#that only Akutagawa would find that form attractive.#Oh last note. honestly if we're ready to accept a movie where an antidote has effect AFTER the person has effectively died then we really–#can't complain about any kind of insanity the manga brings up#random rambles
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Who's 2p Italy's type in partners?
NORTH ITALY: Grazie lo stesso! [ Thanks, regardless! ] NORTH ITALY: And before you ask, no, I had nothing to do with my boss' death. I still dunno what happened there! I was only gone for a few months..
#hetalia#2p hetalia#2p italy#hws italy#aph italy#i woke up at 2 am and eventually i was like. might as well start drawing 2p italy.#anonymous#ita has def killed his bosses before but like. this one he was just confounded by. no guys it wasnt me this time !!#even though italy is def someone who lives by whims... i dont think he would let himself get attached to a human#1p ita ame and france might have brief romances but theyre more just for fun on their part and with no real emotion behind them.#for 2p ita its even worse. becoz hes so paranoid everyone is out to get him... 'why are you so interested in me random woman.'#plus like the ask implies... one day ita might wake up and find out his gf just. Died. she just straight up died. what does he do now. lol.#blood#ask
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rip lucy and mina you would’ve loved farcille. rip marcille you would’ve loved westenray (falin lost interest and fell asleep before finishing the book)
#dracula#lucy westenra#mina harker#mina Murray#Westenray#dungeon meshi#farcille#marcille donato#falin touden#my post#dungeon meshi spoilers in tags: ->#something about it…………idk#childhood girl best friends#a blonde woman who everyone loves and idealizes#proposed to by one of her male friends. has expectations relating to marriage and who she should marry#she’s in peril pretty much immediately. everyone tries to save her but she dies.#she’s unnaturally brought back as a perversion of her former self: a cold blooded killer#the gang has to put her to rest. it’s for the best#luckily Falin is allowed more independence by surviving and having her own story rip#her best friend: an intelligent hard worker/teacher with some gender stuff going on#since iirc it’s possible that mina taught Lucy at some point?#and Marcille was a teacher/researcher at Falin’ s magic school#new women (derogatory) and ‘but those are men’s clothes!!’#all affectionate ofc it makes them more interesting characters#who goes through a mini Dark Arc (vampire mina and dungeon lord marcille)#edit: okay more thoughts. I think that Falin would watch a play or movie and not think too much of it and marcille would go#NOO IT WASNT IN THE SPIRIT OF THE ORIGINAL BOOK!!! listen to the audiobook the adaptations ruin it!!#and Falin would enjoy it more like that
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I loved the ending of the silt verses for so many reasons: because I’m a sucker for the smoking Chekov’s gun, a thematically rich tragedy, and the sickly sweet stench of a narrative that is ultimately and above all else, hopeful.
We were shown the dangers of hope, in the (in retrospect) most seemingly “out of place” episode in the entire series—the hope motel one with the doomed gay people. It was an amazing episode, do not get me wrong, but listening to it for me was like “okay, so based on this, when is hope going to, once again, bite us in the ass. Or literally bite us idk we had somewhat similar foreshadowing used with the sleep god thing from season 1.”
And of course it would be the finale. Of course it would be reading through the transcript, knowing that there’s a shadow of a chance that Carpenter lived to do all the things she was so ready to do, that she wasn’t giving up, or that she died in the water, on her feet, brought to a prophesied end in the god who could not seem to let her go, but that ultimately, she did NOT GO WILLINGLY.
Of course it would be the unknown of Paige and her caravan, trekking through the polluted lands in search of something kinder, something new, knowing that Paige would leave them behind one day—but that day is not today—and she would see them on. It’s hoping beyond hope that they all escape, that they can make something better out there, and that there are ways for people to follow out of this old world, if they choose to read the signs.
That’s what I think that episode was “for.” Obviously episodes like that don’t NEED to tie into the plot directly, and they’re sometimes narratively more satisfying if they’re left self-contained (the power plant ep was also brilliant in a very similar way (and I’m realizing now that that ep also mirrors Paige’s journey….that should be it’s own post)), but its about the theming, the framing of the tragedy, and the foreshadowing of it all. The motel was tragic and awful because it toyed with our hope—rending it functionally untrustworthy. But we choose to hope anyway (I’ve seen the polls lmao) and we make a good story on our own, in our own minds, out of that ambiguity. The ending to me is so good because WE can choose how it ends. We are given that agency, and I think it’s so satisfying either way! We KNOW the god in the motel was fucking with our hope and eating those who dared to try and we still said BUT WHAT IF-
so what’s the harm in hoping for the best for those whose stories continue after we stop consuming them? Hhhhhh this show and this ending are going to stick with me forever
#I just want to say that I hope she died <3#I like both interpretations but that one’s just more interesting to me personally#the fact that carpenter did not go willingly into her death if she did die is what really gets me#she had to be brought down into the embrace of the trawler man by bullet force. nothing else would have made her kneel to him again#if you think she lived that’s another thing that’s hilarious to think about- carpenter being SOO pissed by this#God’s specialist little anathema#the silt verses#the silt verses spoilers#TSV finale#silt verses spoilers#<<I hope I got most blocklists here
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TFOTA update (major spoilers for book 1): chapter 20
this book just keeps throwing plot twist after plot twist after plot twist on me and I'm falling for every.single.one. gosh. first jude kidnaps the human girl to free her into the mortal world, and she drowns herself? Then Dain yells at Jude for the thing I WASN'T expecting (stabbing Valerian) and then Jude fucking KILLS Valerian not even a few minutes later, then buried the body in HER house, then Balekin gatecrashes and slaughters almost everyone in his fucking blood line in the matter of MINUTES. Madoc kills Dain?? And ghost kills Caelia?? Rhyia kills herself?? Taryn and Locke might secretly have an affair??
Jude feels pleasure in seeing Cardan miss out on the coronation bc he got drunk which is ironically the best thing he did bc he dodged a bullet?? Now Cardan is the only hope elfhame has, which is also super ironic since Jude was marvelling over how glad she was that cardan wasn't ever going to be king in the first few chapters.
I NEED A MOMENT TO TAKE ALL THIS IN
#I just whispered holy fuck holy fuck holy fuck the entire time I was reading#I'm speechless#How does one come up with this many plot twists without making it seem clunky#Holly you are a mastermind ily#Gosh this chapter has me in shambles#I haven't even finished book 1 yet i know I'm officially roped into this fandom#For me it's the way Dain and valerian died so casually like-#i genuinely wanted to see more of Dain so I'm kinda disappointed.#I thought his dynamic with Jude would be very interesting in an acquaintance pov like what all could Jude have achieved w the help of Dain?#Valerian can go to hell tho#Poor elowyn :(( she died so suddenly and for no reason aswell#I'm already started to feel dread of what Taryn is going to do to Jude#I'm excited to see jurdan tho eee#tfota#the folk of the air#the cruel prince#tfota series#madoc tfota#cardan greenbriar#prince cardan#jude duarte#dain greenbriar#balekin greenbriar#the cruel prince series#taryn duarte#locke#folk of the air#madoc#tcp
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One more scene from Fuuta-Es convos with @waivyjellyfish for now :3 I liked exploring Es' post-canon mindset as an ex-murder investigator... Like my other drabble, I don't have the details worked out but Milgram is over and they're living at the Kajiyamas' now.
What Fuuta didn’t know wouldn’t hurt him.
It’s what Es told themself as they slipped into his clothes. They’d spotted the outfit at the bottom of Fuuta’s closet a few days ago, then decided to bide their time. With Fuuta and his sister downstairs having breakfast, there was a small window of opportunity now.
Es stuck their arm through the red-striped sleeve. They still didn’t know what possessed them to put it on.
Was it the appeal of something familiar? In a world devoid of all memories, they enjoyed the idea of putting on at least one outfit that they’d seen hundreds of times on their little music video screen. Is it possible to be comforted by someone else’s memories?
Was it old habits? They’d spent each trial doing anything and everything to feel closer to the prisoners. To take a peek into their minds. To step into their shoes. This was taking it a bit literally, they knew. Although everything was over and they had no reason to connect so deeply to any of the prisoners, Es couldn’t get away from the duty they’d obsessed over for so long.
Maybe it was just their troublesome curiosity, always driving them forward. There was a small part of them that hungered for more information, no matter the reason. They were perfectly aware that putting on Fuuta’s red and blue tracksuit would probably offer them absolutely nothing new, but they had to try. Something might be revealed to them, and they needed to know.
Es stood in front of the full length mirror. They turned one way. They turned the other way. They shifted their arms. They cocked their head.
Sure enough, nothing.
They took note of the little details. It was a little big on them, (though it wouldn’t take them long to catch up to Fuuta’s size). It was neither fashionable nor tacky. The material wasn’t exactly comfortable, but at least it felt warm.
But, did it make them feel any closer to Fuuta?
They contemplated a moment, thinking of all that he may have done in the outfit. There were so many classes these pants had walked to, so many arcade coins that these pockets had held. Es wondered if his friends ever nudged the shoulders of the jacket playfully. Maybe they weren’t the type. It had probably seen it’s share of all nighters. And also lazy days spent in bed, or sick days laid up on the couch.
They puffed their chest out, thinking of the confidence Fuuta may have had wearing this. They pulled the hood over their hair. It had likely seen just as much as his hesitance. How many times had he sunk into the thick material for an escape? Or was there an opposite effect – did he feel so comfortable in this that he could commit murder?
Es stared at themself.
There came some shuffling out in the hall. Before Es could move, Fuuta was shouting to his sister and bursting into the room.
“Will you get out of my fucking hair if I bring it to you right –” he froze. “Now...”
Es, too, was frozen in place, their eyes wide.
“I-I’m sorry.” They started unzipping the jacket. “I saw it and… I didn’t mean to –”
“ – It’s fine,” Fuuta muttered. He waved his hand dismissively. He started shuffling things around in his desk drawer, angling his head down, out of sight. His voice was strained, though it wasn’t as angry as Es had been expecting. “It’s not like I’m ever gonna wear it again.”
Es carefully folded the jacket over their arm. “I wasn’t trying to bring up the past. I was just…” What had they been doing?
“I said it’s fine.”
“I know it’s not.”
“You don’t know anything. Wear it every day for all I care. I was just gonna toss it.”
“You still can. Or, I can.”
“Nah.” Fuuta retrieved what he was looking for. He paused in the doorway, taking one last look over his shoulder. “Looks better on you, anyway.”
Es straightened in surprise as he left. They took another look in the mirror. They allowed themself a small smile. They might have undersold how comfortable it was.
Now that they were thinking of it, they did look pretty cool… Maybe that was all there was to it.
#milgram#es#fuuta kajiyama#instead of mvs jackalope should just let es wear the prisoners' murder outfits#adfasdf but really - theres always an interesting closeness that comes from sharing clothes#and i think investigator-brained es would be going crazy with Thoughts#i love the idea of them unable to stop analyzing the prisoners even when theres no need to anymore#it was their One And Only Purpose In Life for a long time and thats hard to shake you know?#also listen. i had to cut a line that ruined my dramatic flow but listen. fuuta was SO nervous wearing that when she died.#hed be scared and running home and sweating. and then hed refuse to touch it from the emotional pain so it would never get washed.#that thing is Boy Stinky im so sorry to break it to you -_-#thank you for the ideas pal!!! im taking a break now but im keeping the others in my back pocket - maybe to write more at some point 👀#drabbles
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fun scene idea that I’ll probably never get around to drawing: someone grabbing a wanted poster from a board or wall only to reveal a missing persons poster featuring the same person as on the wanted poster underneath it (also the reward for them as a wanted person is higher than the reward for returning them when they were missing)
#basically this is something fun I imagine for my oc cashmere#as of right now she’s simply missing (presumed to be kidnapped at least that’s what the family she is from told people)#as of rn in her story she isn’t wanted for anything but that can change I’ll probably have her (attempt to) commit treason against her#own family or something#I think it would be fun that her family is willing to spend less when she’s missing than when they’re mad at him and want him back to be#punished for angering them#I have attempted to draw this out before but was like#it would be better as like an animation tbh but#I can’t animate I’m not going to animate my tablet does not even have the storage for me to animate#maybe a quick animatic if anything but like#idk#it’s more of a fun idea than anything#I imagine what leads to cashmere committing treason is that upon being back in the hands of their family they begin to realize that they#can’t lie to theirself anymore their family is terrible and the reason they died in the first place and snaps#i feel like they found themselves in a situation where they attacked someone out of fear and rage and blah blah that is seen as treason#it would probably be his dad that gets attack im ngl conquest deserves it#or they accidentally hurt them out of fear#I am unsure#*shrug emoji* I’m just making up shit for cashmere as I see fit and per what I find most interesting and fun <3#also cashmere is my only oc rn who would have both a missing and a wanted poster#sure most of my ocs would find themselves wanted for one reason or another or targeted by others#but some cashmere is useful as a tool to their family and having a runaway child is bad for their reputation they’d ofc want her back to#keep her quiet and keep people from finding out that she ran away#they also still think she’s sickly and wouldn’t want anyone to find out who she is that she’s sickly and for word to spread#basically they want cashmere back so their reputation isn’t damaged and so they can go back to using her as they please#I put a lot of suffering into this character#and I will continue to do so because as my favourite this is what happens#sorry I’m babbling
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Evan has this one green sweatshirt that looks ethereal on him, and Barty can simply not pull his eyes away from Evan when he wears it. And this occurrence had been going on for a while, even before Barty and Evan were anything more than friends. For example, Regulus would just be talking to Barty during class, and then Barty’s gaze would just drift off to something beyond Regulus’ shoulder. And Barty would still appear to be “engaged” in the conversation, nodding along and saying the right things in the right places, but mentally his mind was miles away from Regulus and the conversation he was having. In reality, his mind was taking a stroll down much stranger lanes, and he can’t help but wonder what it would be like to hug Evan right now, what it would feel like. What it would feel like to lay on Evan’s chest in front of the fireplace in the common room, playing with the hoodie strings. What it would maybe feel like to take the hoodie off of Evan, pulling it over his head in one smooth motion. And Barty really really wants to steal that sweatshirt from Evan and wear it for himself. Maybe then that girl who was chatting Evan up right now would back off then, too. Barty doesn’t really know why he has a problem with her doing so, surely it’s a somewhat normal feeling to have though—and oh Regulus is expecting a response right now, better say the right thing—but surely it doesn’t mean anything. So really, there’s no reason to think twice about it. To think twice about any of those thoughts. So he continues to gaze at Evan with hearts in his eyes, his chin resting on his hand. Young Barty Crouch Jr was not one to look and act like a love struck fool (not just yet, anyways) but when it came to Evan in that olive green sweatshirt, Barty looked like the most foolish man on earth.
#i feel like eventually Pandora noticed#and since she could kind of tell what was going on#that Barty actually was interested in Evan#And obviously she knew that Evan had a crush on Barty#And so she started getting a bunch of different green sweatshirts/clothes in general for Christmas or for Evan’s birthday#one time she even got him one for Saint Patrick’s Day#But Barty died a little more on the inside each and every time she did this#And Pandora would have this smirk on her face for the rest of the day#and none of them could figure out why#yeah just Pandora being sneaky like that#rosekiller#evan rosier#barty crouch jr#slytherin skittles#marauders era#marauders fandom#barty x evan#evan x barty#pandora rosier#rosekiller headcanon
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honestly i could write essay after essay about everything that made that finale bad. and i will. however comma i genuinely do not care about any of these characters enough to want to do that. i don't want to spend my time critiquing and analysing a show where all the characters are boring and the plot is all deus ex machina.
LIKE. WHO IS RUBY. WHO IS SHE. WHO FUCKING IS SHE.
she's done with the whole SEASON. she was in EVERY episode. and we literally don't know anything about her apart from the whole mom mystery thing which is all for the big reveal at the end anyway?
and i can talk about the ways in which that was unsatisfying and so on. but like what does that tell us about RUBY? what do we know about HER
and the answer is honestly very little. ruby is such a stock doctor who companion that it's just kind of boring. she gets a big mystery, because of fucking course she does, and who is she outside of that? nice?? sweet?? does as she's told?? (this one is fucking boring btw) kind of like the chibnall companions, she's whoever she needs to be for the situation at hand. the writers say ruby needs to be shocked by landing on a planet after 6 months of travelling with the doctor, so she is. she isn't a person. she has one desire, which is to find her mother, and the only reason she gets to have that is that rtd needs to set up whatever the fuck was going on with her mom for the finale. that's it.
and the doctor. like why should we care about this doctor specifically, outside of the fact that this is the character we have been following for the whole show? who is he??? like seriously who is he? he doesn't get any character development? what makes him different from other doctors? who the fuck is this guy????
i said earlier that ncuti's doctor is what you get when you throw all the doctors in a blender and i stand by that. he's definitely the doctor, but he's like an average of all the other doctors with nothing particularly unique or special about him. ruby is what you get when you throw all the companions in a blender. definitely a companion, with nothing unique or special about her either. much like chibnall's companions, all she gets to do is stand around and watch.
and the crucial missing factor is we don't get to see what they see in each other. which from the companion's perspective is still excusable because here's a dude with a spaceship time machine and that sounds kind of sick so lets go and travel with him is an understandable motivation. but what does he see in her? because there's always a moment where you can see the doctor sort of think, oh yeah, i should travel with this person.
but there isn't really this moment with ruby. it's kind of like with how thirteen meets her companions. she just sort of runs into them, and now they're stuck together. and ncuti does get to emote more than jodie, so at least you can see that ruby and the doctor do like each other, but their relationship isn't really fleshed out ever. and like i can buy ruby risking her life for him, because that is just sort of what happens on doctor who, but it's not based on anything. we don't see them develop this trust of each other. their relationship doesn't get developed. it just appears fully formed.
#alexis.exe#dw crit#rtd critical#doctor who critical#i mean i do have more to say#but the main reason this season didnt work for me was that the character work was ass#im simply not invested in any of these characters#when everyone died#like.#yeah that like sucks so hard#but you have to make me CARE about the CHARACTERS#'if you want me to feel bad that they died#i literally felt worse about that one random woman with the dead baby dying than i did about rubys family or fucking rose noble#or that kid genius unit is definitely violating some kind of labour code to employ#didnt even feel bad about kate she's a joke at this point#she hires every single side character its ridiculous#im pretty sure the 13 year old is not old enough to work in the uk btw#didnt feel bad about mel getting possessed by sutekh either lmao bc i knew nothing interesting would happen there#and i was right#idk if you kill Everyone in your story you should maybe make it actually have an emotional impact#im gonna finish my dw complaining in a few days and go rewatch the s10 finale#do yall remember when doctor who was good. i do
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so I heard you wanna talk religion in ttpd! let’s talk I Can Fix Him (No Really I Can).
“they shake their heads saying ‘God help her’ when I tell ‘em he’s my man.” this isn’t the outright controlling judgment of the saboteurs in But Daddy I Love Him. nobody is trying to tell her what to do or force her to break up. this is a simple admission that the situation she’s in is difficult, that she’s chosen a hard path and needs help. and what is her response? “your good Lord doesn’t need to lift a finger, I can fix him, no really I can.” she admits salvation is needed. but Taylor is casting herself as the savior. she doesn’t need any help, any grace, any divine assistance. in fact, she doubles down: “only I can”. she and she alone has the power to reform this man, because of the love between them. it’s reminiscent of False God, except now the idol isn’t their love, it’s just her. she’s going to save him.
what’s interesting to me is we don’t know how the themes of salvation would have been recapitulated in light of the reversal at the end of the song, “whoa maybe I can’t”, because the song ends there. maybe she can’t fix him because he is ultimately unfixable, irredeemable, worthless. or maybe she can’t fix him because she’s not God. and honestly, I think the song is meant to leave us wondering. she’s waking up to reality, but is the reality his smallness of soul or her power trip?
so what is the blatant Christian language in this song for? is it telling us that Christianity is evil for implanting the idea of redemption into our minds when it doesn’t really exist? or is it a hint that trying to become our own gods, even with the best of intentions, is a pathway that leads only to death?
#I think a lot of women do have resentment toward their Christian upbringing precisely because they absorbed this idea of saving a fallen man#but what we have to recognize is#Christianity does not teach that women are supposed to save men!!#Christianity teaches that we are all saved by Christ!!#and so the answer is actually to go deeper into Christianity not to flee from it#and it’s interesting to me that this song doesn’t outright contradict that!!#the song is not about the psychology of trying to fix someone#it’s about the theology of it#Taylor explicitly paints herself as Savior and not psychiatrist#she would have died for his sins!!!!!#and so we can talk all day long about the foolishness of trying to fix someone#but Taylor paints a picture of an even more hubristic foolishness#and the answer could be either ‘he wasn’t worth fixing in the first place. you shouldn’t have tried.’#OR it could be ‘you should’ve had some humility. you should’ve relied on the Lord and not your own strength’#this is me admitting I need a music tag#is it a little dickish of me to post this? yes. I am an imperfect person
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it’s funny how things have gone full circle with malenia. she was so hated when the game first came out, but then people grew to like her. then the dlc came out and now people hate her again lmao
#i mean it’s hardly surprising given what we now know#she did all that awful shit and wasn’t even charmed#like i see people talk about how stupid miquella is because of this plan to essentially trap radahn#but that also makes malenia look stupid af too#‘go to caelid and kill radahn so i can marry him’ ans she was like sure#miquella wanted the one guy in the lands between who loves war and fighting to be his consort for his age of peace and compassion…#what a genius he is.#makes me wonder why he even needs some heavy weight to keep order for him when he can just charm people into submission#was radahn just there as a ceremonial position?#oh wait i forgot miquella thinks he’s super kind so that’s why he wants him#miq learnt about the gravity magic horse thing and swooned#honestly still can’t get over how incredibly stupid the twins look after the dlc#i think people like to imagine malenia was charmed just because it makes it all look slightly better on her part#like they are just making excuses for her#but holy shit the fact she was all but willing to fucking die so miquella could bag radahn..#what a thing to die for lmao#and he was apparently present after the battle? but didn’t do anything to help either radahn nor malenia?#instead he was helping a random redmane?#he obviously knew malenia had bloomed but ultimately didn’t care i guess#kind of like ‘oh well if she’s still alive when I get back i’ll deal with it then’#honestly wish miquella had just died in that cocoon at this point#tbh he doesn’t really do much in the dlc anyway they could have made it more about messmer and marika#hell bring melina into it please that would have been more interesting at this point#we didn’t need the dubcon incest plot micheal you could have left that one in the drafts#i gotta get this out of my head it’s driving me nuts#seriously need to move on from this game for my own sanity
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thinking abt how the masters life revolves around the doctor and how the doctors life revolves around their companions and how the root of these obsessions (other than like love and affection and whatever) is probably just bc it must be so boring to be a time lord
like ok. as a time lord (and specifically as the doctor or the master) you’re generally the smartest person in every room, however, you know the flow of time very intimately so you can’t meaningfully invent anything, you can’t participate in the contribution to society because you can’t advance them past how they’re supposed to be advanced, and you rarely have peers who can challenge you and who you can challenge in return without becoming some kind of all-knowing mentor figure.
like, yeah, if the master created a deep and enriching life for themselves outside of their relationship with the doctor they would probably grow into a much happier and well-balanced individual, but like. How are they supposed to do that? they can’t go back to gallifrey (bc at any given point in time its either destroyed or they just don’t “fit in” there) to be around other time lords. they don’t care or empathize with people the way the doctor does so the challenge of “saving people” doesn’t interest them. and we’ve established that they can’t just join up with a group of scientists and inventors somewhere for the sake of timelines or whatever. so what does that leave? ummm attempts at world/galactic/universal domination i guess. obsession over the singular other being that is just as intelligent and disconnected as you are i guess. bc everything else is too easy or too boring and that’s without even considering any of the masters predisposition for violence/chaos/supremacy/etc.
#is this comprehensible? idk#i read a post abt the master creating a life for themselves outside of the doctor and was trying to think of what that LOOKED like and um#this is where I got.#(the post by sclfmastery btw)#anyway I think that if the master looked at ‘saving people’ from a problem-solving/puzzle-solving perspective they could actually do a lot#of good AND have a lot of fun doing it. and that’s probably actually the direction missy was heading in before she died. but I think the#doctor would STILL be a dickhead about it because they would act like there’s somehh thing wrong with the master being more interested in#the problem-solving than the people saving (probably because the doctor themselves is frequently just as if not more interested in the#problem-solving than the people-saving and doesn’t like thinking abt that lol)#but. yeah#dw analysis#missy#the master#dhawan!master#delgado!master#thoschei#twissy#spydoc#doctor who#mios
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