#im not tagging people because i dont have the energy sorry :(
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me when i want to accept writing commissions vs the depression thats been eating me inside and out
#i like#offered comms once#but now i have venmo and i know how to use it#but like#if i opened them back up i just#i dont know if id even have the motivation to write anyway#not to just traumadump in the tags lol but everythings felt so difficult lately#i feel so empty and not real#every day i struggle with the intense urge to just delete everything ive ever written#every account i own#and just disappear forever#and like. im not good at making connections with people?#so even though ive spiraled into another pit of isolation ive had one person check on me and it was my bf who i talk to every day anyway#and honestly i think the reason im typing this here even though its very tmi is because like#i just need to get stuff out? because maybe getting stuff out will like#help#but i dont know if it will#i started going back to therapy but i dont even know if thatll help#writing is hard#getting up in the morning is hard#breathing is hard#everything just feels so hard and i feel like i have no energy to do anything ever#and its felt like that for months and months but its getting worse as time goes on#anyway uh#im trying not to take my hiatus until february#but i havent been able to write anything in like two weeks#so maybe i wont be able to keep to my super awesome posting schedule and will instead go back to posting things sporadically as i finishthe#which wasnt often nor paced#and typically the thing that keeps me writing is praise (which is unhealthy ik) but uh. ive not been getting a lot of that so its just like#i dont know. sorry
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You alive man?
Just wanted to check as it's been bout a month or so since your last post
no i'm dead but don't worry about it. tis the season and all that shit ya know?
(all that shit includes, but is not limited to, seasonal depression, art block, retail and food service worker hell, the election, 5 stress induced nightmares in the space of a week, managing a new relationship [first time], living in a capitalist nightmare, etc.)
[more rambles in the tags, as i am often to do]
#its been two months anon im so sorry#ive been doodling but like not getting anything done at all#there is just nothing going on upstairs i am beyond burnt out but i don't know how to take breaks and#its really fucking killin' me folks#don't do this to yourself learn to take breaks from things that are draining you#lean to manage your batteries and dont stretch yourself thin to make other people happy#i know this and i keep doing it to myself anyway#i dont like to vent here so i wont go into much more detail than what i already mentioned in the body and all those tags#just generally exhausted and having a hard time finding the energy to draw and be happy with it#outside of that had a loss in the family that hit way harder than i thought it would#there has been good to though stress and good things#gonna travel outta the country for the first time ever even if it is just up north but im really excited#half the reason im being assassinated by work is because i need the money so i can take this vacation without worry#as well as having a partner for the first time since.... 5th grade? if that even counts?#i feel like a whole years has happened in the span of two months i'm dying chat#not art related
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i feel like i type so much more than is reasonable when i do talk to people but i also don't get to socialize a ton so i just have soooo many words in me and if i'm like, tired or short on time, it is so much harder to restrain to the already-pushing-it point i can sometimes manage ;-;
#txt#i am used to posting long things that are essentially a conversation with myself because i either don't#want to bother others with certain topics or i just am used to anything i have to say really being... worth saying...#so i will sometimes go back and add more tags because i'm still thinking about it after the fact and the gap in time where someone#would have said something to prompt further thought is just. me continuing it with myself. bc i'm still thinking about it.#and then that translates into how i talk to other people where i sometimes feel like i either have too much to say without only#keeping what's of utmost relevant importance#(which is also due to me knowing if i don't say it Right Now Immediately i will forget if it does become relevant again)#so i am expecting people to read too much#and/or i then am not... listening to people? or i come off like im not listening to people?#even though i rly do try to be attentive i just forget sometimes to leave space for other people to talk because i am#used to only talking to myself so much lmaoo so i think i come off like i only want to Talk At people due to how Much i share#and sometimes i probably am not as attentive in convos as i would like to be but i try to be! i just dont know if the balance is there#but i also don't rly know how to be more concise bc of that mix of not wanting to forget and also not wanting to be misunderstood#and being so excited to get contribute etc#anyway there are also a lot of social things i HAVE been neglecting by accident i am so sorry if youve sent me an ask etc#and you've gotten silence i am getting to things slowly ;-;#i just mean moreover in active conversations the way that i act is like. i always worry i am doing something wrong all the time forever#and maybe i would worry less if i could put more of my thought dump energy into observing others more attentively#to get a better read on things lol#me coming back to this post as an example bc i had another thought:#i also type rly fast and my brain goes rly fast so while i do clean up what i say typically#others might find it more convenient to be more concise due to typing slower#whereas i don't think before i type i just type as i think one to one#i lose thoughts otherwise but Thinking Before I Speak is a lost art to me rip#but then if i am talking to people irl or on voice i am so much more reserved. i ramble a lot!!#but it's easier for me to fall back
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#im not looking for sympathy or anything with this post i just need to fucking say something#but i don't want to dump it all on one person#or even multiple people#because idk what i'd do#or what i'd say to someone in this situation#'just keep going' is all well and good but it only works for so long#so i don't expect anyone to try and deal with this#i wouldn't want them to#because it's fucking stressful#so this is just. screaming into the void.#but uh#fuck#im not ok and idk what to do#dont worry ill be fine#ill still be here tomorrow#and the next day#and the next day and the next day#cause im like a fucking cockroach#living out of spite#but im so fucking sick of feeling like this all the time#im so fucking sick of having no energy or motivation and feeling like my life is gonna go nowhere#im so sick of just. hurting all the time.#it hurts so much#vent post#tw vent#im gonna tag this shit from now on#cause i understand why ppl might not wanna see it#cause there's enough depressing shit going on right now#and if you saw this im sorry and it's not your responsibility to deal with this 🫂#go drink water and take care of yourself
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i keep seeing people on tiktok complaining about untagged jaytim on ao3 as if it's a frequent problem for them like they're stumbling across the ship in fics that weren't tagged for it every other day or something. and like. as someone who reads a probably unhealthy amount of batfam fanfiction, I have literally never had that happen? with jaytim or any other combination of robin shipping? actually in all my years of reading on ao3 I feel like I've seen fics that weren't tagged for the ships in them maybe once or twice in any fandom.
like maybe you should read the tags a little more carefully if you're getting jump scared by a ship you don't like that often. or better yet use the search filters and exclude it! although let's be honest they're probably just lying about it to stir up drama around their least favorite ship
#probably people do this for other ships too#i just see the videos complaining about jaytim most often because im on the batfam side of tiktok#i dont understand the impulse to spend your time and energy bitching about a ship you dont like#when you could just block the tag and move on with your life#jaytim#<- so people can block it this isn't really a jaytim post sorry if it's coming up in the tag#anyway i don't really have a point here#it just irritates me and i don't want to comment on tiktok because starting a fight with those people sounds exhausting
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10 characters, 10 fandoms
Rules: list your ten favorite characters from ten different fandoms and tag ten people :D
tagged by @emily-prentits ty >:) not sure if i even have this many fandoms but lets try lmao
Julia Argent (Carmen Sandiego)
Cinder (Lunar Chronicles)
Thirsty Bisexual Girl Vampire Hunter w/ Thing for MILFs (SFTHverse)
Clearsight (Wings of Fire)
Marcy Wu (Amphibia)
Viktor (Arcane)
Dr. Bailey (Grey's Anatomy) (mostly in terms of guy I'd like to hang out with HAHAHA. dont come for me #1 Addison Stan)
Silk (Silk Comics)
Gwen Stacy (Spiderverse)
Nita (Not Even Bones)
#im not tagging people because i dont have the energy sorry :(#consider yourself my friend and tagged if you see this and want to do it#i feel like im missing some really obvious fandoms im in here but i cant. think of any#so#heres this??#tag game
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trying to decipher if the overwhelming dread & Thoughts are cause of the state of the world or cause i need a shower.
vent post in the tags. idk. do whatever 👍
#sorry bros im about to ventpost in these mf tags 👍#im so fucking tired man. im already suicidal to begin with but the Everything happening is making it Worse. Yippe Yahoo Hooray.#therapy in a week though so ive got that at least.#this is the worst time of year for shit to go south.but Uh Oh saying that makes me feel like a selfish fuckass because other people -#- have it worse. like. god fucking damn. i get Extra suicidal around september -> march range sure. but other people are literally suffering#like as we fucking speak. and ive done fuckall to help cause i dont know HOW to help. but thats not a fucking excuse#im just being comfortable in my lazy ass depression spiral cause im a selfish fucking prick. “i cant spare the energy to vett things”#other people are fucking dying and im over here like “noo im too tiwed :( i cant do anyfing so im not gona do anyfing cuz im wazy and tiwed”#what the fuck is wrong with me lmao. knowing me im not gona change shit anyway despite fucking complaining about it cause im just. fucking#Like That.#idk. i was reblogging some of those “hold in there dont kill yourselves” posts cause like. yk. suicide bad or fucking whatever. but someone#on this site said something along the lines of “ok but how many people reblogging/posting these told jews to kill themselves” and like.#i dont know. i dont fucking know dude. so i guess im not reblogging Those anymore.#theres bigger issues out there and here i am focusing on some queer people who might kill themselves. idk. i should just join them yk#cause i never fucking focus on the bigger shit cause “i dont know how” and “i dont want to make things worse so i just wont do anything” so#im not doing fuckall other than just being part of the fucking problem here.#i should probably just delete social media for a while and see from there.#or just fucking drink about it thats the other option. its worked for me before (lie) so i may as well do it again am i right#im sorry i never like. boost gofundmes or fundraisers and shit i just.#i dont have a fucking excuse. im just a lazy fucking bastard in my own stupid fucking comfort circle.#“oh no seeing that people are dying makes me uncomforyable :(” ok well people are fucking dying you self absorbed douchebag. why cant you#get off your stupid fucking ass and do something. get a job so you can fucking help people or *something#its not like you have to pay rent and shit.#<- all about myself. cause yk. self centered douchbag. hooray.#i dont pay rent and i dont have to pay for my own food. i still live with my parents. im fucking useless to society so i may as well get a#job and send the money i dont fucking need to somrone who DOES need it. but here i am.#in.my stupid fucking bed til noon cause “the world is scary and jobs are hard :(”#its fucking retail. retail isnt as fucking hard as like. construction and shit but here i am anyway “unable” to do shit.#i fucking could if i just fucking ballsed up and put up with shit. but no. here i fucking am going “nooo i should just kill myself instead”#vent post
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You ever sit in a fandom space for so long that now looking at it kind of makes you want to rip your nails off.
Yeah.
#feeling this with Omori#ill look at my recommended tags and see some shit and immediately think “thats enough for today.”#granted alot of the community is children so of course theres gunna be cringey posts and that's fine#but then theres times its just weird and i realise i am far to tired for this shit now#i wanted to try and get into fandom spaces to be myself more and open up but i have now just gotten tired#but ultimately this was also the point in my life i was having an identity crisis and i like to think i have changed alot over the last year#im tired of everyone being called out as a predator or twelve year olds fighting over stupid shit#id rather focus my energy into my real life problems and not the latest “blorboscimbosimp24” drama#christ sometimes i regret getting into omori which is sad because its a game near and dear to my heart#but everyday theres some new shit that happens that sends people fucking feral#and also omocat herself is just a whole can of worms i just cannot be assed with.#that's not to say i hate everything about fandoms. ive met and talked to some really nice people and i enjoy their stuff#but still i have so little patience for peoples bullshit#sorry for ranting but im done with everyones horseshit and people being predators and wether or not omocat is a creep#i dont know i sort of dont care because god knows i have far more pressing matters in my personal life that need my attention#also this doesn't mean im not talking or posting about omori. i still like it but fuck man sometimes it feels awkward saying i like it#rant#random rambles
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Not sure if I'll be doing anything more for artfight this year I am. suffering. sorry :(
#my posts tag#work stress making me panic because i dont want to work and i dont know how to run a business#i hate living w other people?!!? so much???????????#im isolated and lonely but also social interaction with ppl is hard and makes me feel ill#body image hater brain is also being really hard to ignore lately too!!#AND my bf hauve covid. for the first time ever. i dont have the energy to take care of him as i am busy mentally kms#and withdrawls still. and the new med isnt working.#and i have to be anxious about not being able to afford either new or old med#because of withdrawals. i think at least. intrusive thoughts are fucking UNIGNOREABLE i cannot swioe away the fucking mental notification#its auto playing loud videos in my head. healp#and i honestly dont enjoy art anymore. or anything at all really.#games and stuff i previously loved are announcing new stuff that should be exciting but its just burnout and fomo#i have no money and no income and it makes me feel awful even tho like yeah im didabled n finding work is fucking impossible??#been in bed like 2 days and when im not asleep im sewer slidal yaaaay#anyways all that was mostly for me. sorry#i have moments of faith and reassurance like yeah this IS a waste of my energy i KNOW itll be fine lol? but i cant. hold onto it.#and that specifically might be system related but so frustrating. can we please work together.
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#sorry to every recent follower who's seen my nonsense thus far#anyways this time its going in the tags so. vent warning#mfw i will never fit in with any circle im in and dont match their energy in the right way#i like what they like but not in the right way#dont communicate in the right way. dont interact in the right way#dont enjoy certain things they all seem to like#incapable of doing anything right. incapable of connecting to anybody. one such reason why i need to be taken out back and shot#end my pitiful life now because i will never fucking be able to interact with other people normally#i am convinced there is nothing that can be done about it#i need to be put out of my misery#i cant reach out cant talk to them cant ask to be included. ill annoy them. then i wont have anyone in my circle at all.#sure i might seem fun but im only good in small doses. no one would want to be around me too long.#i get boring. i get annoying. my jokes all fall flat#im only good when im being as likeable and funny and entertaining as i can be#i dont belong in any conversation. if i talk im just an interruption. if i talk about what im up to then im just being annoying#annoying people get blocked right? its only a matter of time till they figure out you're one of those.#im not fun to be around its just that simple. thats why no one wants to talk to me. no one seeks me out. not that i blame them#why would they i havent given anyone a reason to#i might as well not be here. its just like school was. i dont exist to anybody. there is plexiglass between me and the world#ok i need to stop now#its my fault anyways
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Starting to wonder if I have bipolar but then I would literally have almost every mental illness. Like fr I'm not kidding you, I'm a collector and I never chose this
#it does run in my family since my mom had it#i just wonder because while im almost always suicidal the way that prevents itself can greatly change very quickly#like periodically ill be stuck to my bed very sad very mopy for like 3 weeks to 3 months#and then sudden i get this burst of false energy that is actually severe restlessness#and i NEED to do something when that happens. sometimes i just cannot sleep because ive gotta do something#sometimes i frantically draw or write and ill have these moments where i feel ecstatic and when i come back to normal levels of sadness#im convinced i mustve been delusional to think the thoughts that i had then#usually the sadness isnt as bad during those periods but the suicidality is much worse actually because i become very frantic#and have so much more energy#idk. my theory thus far has been either 1) adhd causing mood dysregulation and hyperactivity#2) fluctuations in my depression and anxiety combating each other. actually both of these.#or 3) DID. just DID. i think thats lretty self explanatory#the interesting thing is that i think what i described with point 1 and 2 would be clinically considered bipolar...?#listen clinicians dont always consider the other factors that contribute to what symptoms the person is having#especially in psychology where the lines are very blurry since diagnosis tends to be made on behavioral observations#and also on self reported symptoms.i suspect im one of the only people who would describe symptoms like 'im having x because i have y'#and not just 'im having x symptom'#skfjfh sorry to everyone who reads my tags 👍 psychology special interest go brr
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I always have to remind myself that I don’t need to push myself to make art, and I don’t need to apologize or feel bad for not making a lot of art. art is something that should make me feel happy, so if I’m pushing myself to the point of not enjoying it anymore, then I should just stop and calm down for a second. and take some time for myself. Art won’t disappear, it will always be there waiting for me again, its okay for me to take some time doing others things sometimes.
#sorry this is a bit negative. most of the art i’ve been making latelyis personal/ocs so i dont post it here and thats been stressing me out#since im scared a lot of people are expecting things from my art that i cant give#my art changes a lot because i get inspired by so many things each day. and a lot of my designs are personal and mean a lot to me#so seeing other people like them is both a happy thing for me. but also so scary.#most people i see post art in fandoms im in will post so much of it so often#so i think i subconsciously think that i have to do that too. Make a bunch of art super fast and i HAVE to post ALL of it#but from the things that disabled me to just. that not being how i do things. i cant keep up with that#art takes a long time for me to feel happy with. And i dont always have the motivation or energy to finish all my drawings#Or even do things past a messy sketch#so i keep most things to myself for one reason or another#i dont know it just feels like everyone needs to have things “now now now. fast fast fast” nowadays.#or else the stuff you make isnt worth it. or isnt as good as everything else. In the case you make art late into joining the fandom#I think someone called it fast consumerism? or something? But yeah its just#bad. i dont like it at all#sorry for the long tags. i might stop posting as much art for a bit so i can take some time for myself.#go outside more. learn a new hobby. maybe even join a club or something#if you read through this hi. feel free to ask for my toyhouse if you want to see my ocs or whatnot.#I was very lax on checking my grammar here. not sorry this time. im getting seen for dysgraphia and im tired and need a break#myposts#rambling
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Since you've been talking about Riku quite a bit lately I was just wondering - are there any of your mutuals' ocs that you think he would get along well with?
Alright I've been putting this off for like. Two months now because I've been really nervous about it (a good nervous) but fuck it I'm just gonna get this done!!!
OK so the short answer is yes. I'll be 100% honest whenever a mutual posts about their OC I am IMMEDIATELY thinking about how they'd vibe with Riku. I can't help it I think about him 24/7 and to be honest I think it's actually a fun exercise that helps build up characters to imagine how he'd get on with other people.
The longer answer is tough because I don't want to ramble on too long and also I feel. silly. enough so I'm gonna just limit it to a few of my mutuals OCs. Readmore cause this got kinda long but also let me say that you should absolutely check out all the OCs I mentioned because they're so cool and well thought out and just amazing :]
So the first one is Nico (latenitewaffles) OC Katsuro Sanada who has been spinning around in my head ever since Nico introduced him. He's such a cool guy and I get excited whenever Nico posts about him!! Katsuro is an Akishinji kid so obviously with Riku being a Yukamitsu kid, these two would have grown up together. I think they'd balance each other pretty well!! From what I know of Katsuro he's a pretty chilled low energy dude, which honestly Riku needs because that boy is like a comet. Full of energy fr fr. I feel like Riku would have also had a much better time as a kid because he would have had someone very close to his age as a friend. There would be a period of time where the two would be in Kosei together and unfortunately I feel like they wouldn't spend much time together because Riku would have shut himself off from everyone while he was dealing with Hatanaka's bullshit and at the same time Katsuro had all the stuff with Nakada going on too. They'd def make it up to each other afterwards though :] Also Riku 🤝 Katsuro -> having weird ass dreams involving moons and coffins and green skies.
The second one I'm picking I'm cheating a little and picking two of Rui's (wildcard-rumi) OCs Tobei and Aki! If you wanna read more about them I'd highly recommend Rui's fic its so so good. I know there's more OCs in their Persona group but these would be the two I know most about. I think Riku would vibe with them pretty well too!! I know Tobei dislikes being pitied for his illness and I think Riku would kinda get that. He'd have to stop himself from checking in on him every two minutes because he just really cares about his friends but I think Riku would definitely encourage him to try new things, although maybe his high energy might overwhelm Tobei a bit... As for Aki well Riku would honestly vibe with him so much, he'd probably beg Aki to get him to teach him skateboard tricks... only for him to fail spectacularly because he was way too over enthusiastic about it. Also I found it kinda funny there's a place in the fic called Riku Park which is connected to the Labyrinth (which is the Shadow world of Rui's fic) and I think Riku would constantly refer to it as his park and would probably try and convince people he bought it. Just to see the look on their faces 💀
The third one then I'm picking is Asuka Misty (misty-wisp) OC! Another OC I've been rotating in my brain since Misty dropped this fic with her. Initially I think Asuka would be weary of Riku. Cause like Asuka is a very anxious person (for good reason too girl's going through it) and Riku is well. Riku "is anyone gonna rush head first into this dangerous situation" then doesn't wait for an answer Kirijo. However, I think because Asuka is really good at reading people, she'd probably be one of the few people to pick up on the fact that Riku's ego is just a front for how insecure in himself he actually is and eventually I think they'd be good friends :] Also I'm pretty sure Asuka gets on very well with Ann and well Riku gets on extremely well with Ann so the three of them would vibe well with Ann acting as kinda the middle ground between the two.
OK I think that's like. The main ones I can think of where I know enough about the OC to talk about the potential Riku dynamic. A few honorable mentions would be (yusuke-of-valla) Alto's OC Ryuko, both her and Riku are theatre kid nerds and would probably sing + gush about Musicals together, Gabe (elijah-terry) OC Yuuha again they both love dancing so they'd vibe with that and also they have a black mask AU and thats all I can think of for now. I know there's other OCs I'm missing so I'm really sorry about that >.< But this was a really fun ask to think out thank you anon :] and I hope I did all my mutuals' OCs justice....
#asks#anonymous#god. this was fun#im really sorry i didnt tag anyone i am just extremely awkward.#and like i love gushing about people's ocs!! trust me!!#but like a) I know there's people i forgot and im really really sorry about that#and b) because its how they interact with RIKU its like. idk i feel a bit silly#im so sorry here i am gushing about my mutuals awesome ocs and i dont even have the guts to tag them 😭#but yeah go check everyone out their work is amazing <3#and to anyone i did mention... if i a) got the dynamic wrong im so sorry i was kinda going off what i knew about the ocs#and b) if y'all idk... ever wanna talk about this kinda thing... my askbox is open 🥺👉👈#this bitch riku needs more friends anyway#<- saying that with the energy of a grumpy dad trying to get his son to make friends
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listen i dont like fëanor but i can't deny that getting so mad you literally burst into flames and crumble away into ash is kinda fucking relatable
#i was about to go “do i have to tag this for spoilers” in my own head as though the silm isnt literally older than me#tbf not as many people read it as lotr or the hobbit but still. come on brain wtf#esp since someone would have to be really weird to come on my blog specifically to complain about spoilers lmao#i do think its funny I've only now gotten around to readinf it but its taking me so long to make myself listen to it that i keep forgetting#things especially in the really long chapters#to the extent now i find myself going “oh maybe i need to write down names because of course everyone has to start with an f”. i was doing#okay and then i went a really long time without reading so now im like wait wait go back#which sucks because i usually dont have trouble getting through long books. admittedly i listen more than read lately#but still. i think it took me maybe a week to get through priory the first time? like i dont think its that im not interested i just havent#had a lot of energy to expend or to get really into things? idk i keep forgetting from finals up till now has been extra bad in terms of..#..pain. chronic migraines gonna migraine ig. i bitch about it like i havent lived this way for years n years. but they were never as bad..#..until i started college and now theyve been worse than ever. i hate thinking about how much time i always lose. how much time ill always#be losing. sorry how the fuck did this turn into a tangent.
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@cortexrampage josh you should do this
WELCOME TO CRINGETOBER!
I wanted to post the prompt list a month in advance so people have time to work on it :)
There are no hard rules; it's just a fun art exercise to draw things that are considered "cringe" by popular culture. Don't stress if you miss a day!!
Even if you don't participate, it would mean the world to me if you just shared the prompt list because it took me a while to make it lol.
I hope you have fun with it!!!
#might do all of these this month so ill have enough energy for inktober#doing all of these except alt fashion because im not a fan. ill replace that with Jay Fashion™ (i like Real Scene and Real Emo but#to me alt = tiktok egirl or bunnyhat demonia and thats all i can think of. so. jay fashion or maybe some other#kind of fashion. ill figure something out. just. Not that. no offense to anyone who dresses like that but NOT MY THING AT ALL EVER)#unimportant tags these are mostly for myself so i dont forget what im doing. and also explaining dislike because people get so angry#over that for some reason. alt and prep are just. Never. sorry.
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booooo vent in tags BOOOOO TOMATO TOMATO
#feeling very frustrated with how bad i am at being a person#like i just do not have the energy to survive#nothing can hold my attention anymore and its fucking with my desire to create anything#and thats not even in like a 'i need to make something to be worth something' way its more#'holy fucking christ im so fucking bored every day all the time forever' way#im also realizing that i fucking suck genuine ass at just talking to people#i dont know what to say in conversation. like im just fucking stupid#i have a small list of preloaded responses and if none of them fit what was said to me i STRUGGLE#i didnt always feel like this but im decaying#if more than two different people dm me in a day thats a whole Event#had something i wanted to say but got dsitracted for a second and immediately lost my train of thought loollll (gritted teeth)#whatever tldr im lonely but im too 2 dimensional of a person to know how to make friends anymore#i WANT to talk to people but talking has become exhausting and i dont know how to get better#if i at least had the energy to keep creating my own content to keep myself entertained i would be fine honestly#but i cant have anything so even thinking about the characters that i love feels like something i have to force myself to do#and still struggle with because i cant pay attention to jack shit#i like to think that maybe i just need to be medicated for something. probably adhd. and then ill be all better and happy#but 1 money 2 time 3 effort 4 what if it doesnt work#yeah time and effort sounds like little bitch shit and yeah it is but im not exaggerating when i say i have no energy#sorry the tags on this are getting so long i keep coming back to add more so i dont bug anyone with a new post#i just. i dont know what to do. im consistently unhappy every day and it keeps getting worse#if i wasnt scared to die i wouldve ended it months ago
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