#to get a better read on things lol
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milfbrainrot · 4 months ago
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i feel like i type so much more than is reasonable when i do talk to people but i also don't get to socialize a ton so i just have soooo many words in me and if i'm like, tired or short on time, it is so much harder to restrain to the already-pushing-it point i can sometimes manage ;-;
#txt#i am used to posting long things that are essentially a conversation with myself because i either don't#want to bother others with certain topics or i just am used to anything i have to say really being... worth saying...#so i will sometimes go back and add more tags because i'm still thinking about it after the fact and the gap in time where someone#would have said something to prompt further thought is just. me continuing it with myself. bc i'm still thinking about it.#and then that translates into how i talk to other people where i sometimes feel like i either have too much to say without only#keeping what's of utmost relevant importance#(which is also due to me knowing if i don't say it Right Now Immediately i will forget if it does become relevant again)#so i am expecting people to read too much#and/or i then am not... listening to people? or i come off like im not listening to people?#even though i rly do try to be attentive i just forget sometimes to leave space for other people to talk because i am#used to only talking to myself so much lmaoo so i think i come off like i only want to Talk At people due to how Much i share#and sometimes i probably am not as attentive in convos as i would like to be but i try to be! i just dont know if the balance is there#but i also don't rly know how to be more concise bc of that mix of not wanting to forget and also not wanting to be misunderstood#and being so excited to get contribute etc#anyway there are also a lot of social things i HAVE been neglecting by accident i am so sorry if youve sent me an ask etc#and you've gotten silence i am getting to things slowly ;-;#i just mean moreover in active conversations the way that i act is like. i always worry i am doing something wrong all the time forever#and maybe i would worry less if i could put more of my thought dump energy into observing others more attentively#to get a better read on things lol#me coming back to this post as an example bc i had another thought:#i also type rly fast and my brain goes rly fast so while i do clean up what i say typically#others might find it more convenient to be more concise due to typing slower#whereas i don't think before i type i just type as i think one to one#i lose thoughts otherwise but Thinking Before I Speak is a lost art to me rip#but then if i am talking to people irl or on voice i am so much more reserved. i ramble a lot!!#but it's easier for me to fall back
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xxplastic-cubexx · 6 months ago
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your movie charles art gives me cuteness aggression
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obsessed with getting these asks back to back and yet they both hold some truth i think ...... thank you very much everyone ....
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willowser · 11 months ago
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31 year old soggy loser touya that can't drive or stay out after curfew and that was released from prison 7 months ago and has to keep his job at ace hardware and has to go to his meetings and is figuring out how to both apologize and forgive and is so far behind socially among his peers because of all he had to endure during his child/teenagehood my beloved
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liriostigre · 2 months ago
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those posts and memes and videos of people saying they buy and buy books but they never read them (you know those that are like "me buying a new book: 😃, the 50 unread on my shelf looking at me: 👁️👁️. or those 100+ physical tbr booktube videos. or some bullshit like that) piss me off so much because i WISH i could afford books—the books i want to read! i read everything on my phone and all of them illegally downloaded. and no, i can't borrow books from the public library because i live at the end of the world in a small forgotten town with no local public library. i'm messing up my sight with so much screen time because i love reading while those consumerist fools can't even fathom what it's like to value things!
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mlobsters · 3 months ago
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severance s1e8 what's for dinner?
man, what is going on at waffle house these days
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scruncheduppaper · 4 months ago
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seeing ppl on twitter’s takes about snowgrave kriselle makes me want to kill myself oh my godddd “its toxic” “regular kriselle better bc its healthier” DO YOU THINK I WANT TO SEE THEM MUSHY KISS AND BE LOVEY DOVEY AND HUG EACH OTHER??? NO!!! the APPEAL is that adding romantic connotations to their snowgrave relationship (which mind you very much already exists in canon) allow their relationship to become so much more interesting. do i think they’ll become truly endgame canon? do i think they’re in love with each other??? ABSOLUTELY NOT!!! AND I DONT WANT THEM TO!!! the POINT is that it’s supposed to be dark and interesting and exploratory of their characters in relation to the deconstruction of autonomy in video games through gender roles and principles of knighthood and the idea of the “damsel in distress”. not to mention that “shipping” regular kriselle and snowgrave kriselle isnt mutually exclusive either. in fact i think understanding both allows you to analyse their relationship much more fully and deeply than without considering the other side. and besides, isnt the fucking point of shipping to explore character relationships??? why would you want to Ignore nuance and depth rather than focus on it???? are you unable to handle anything deeper or darker than like fucking cocomelon??? if you hate character analysis and dark themes in relationships you can head on back there or smth idfk oh my lord i cant fucking TAKE IT ANYMORE
#snowgrave#kriselle#rant#deltarune#this probably comes off as harsh lol#i was going to add its alright if you find snowgrave kriselle uncomfortable for personal reasons#but like sincerely if youre in the utdr fandom and you’ve seen the fucking geno route then i think you can handle this#and not only that but i feel like nowadays fandoms are purposefully trying to get away from darker subject matter and themes#while in the process airbrushing nuance and details in favour of shoving characters into tropes and boxes#all in the name of ‘person comfort’ and ‘preference’#and while i cant control what other people do or ship or whatever#i do think its a sign that we’re leaning far more into anti-intellectualism these days#and people are just completely unwilling to engage with things outside their comfort zone#its okay to have preferences! its fine if you think kriselle is bad!#but like if your only reasoning is that its unhealthy and toxic then idfk what to tell you man#please play/watch/read better media#relationships in media can be toxic and unhealthy and portrayed without romanticisation#kriselle is very much so!#my ideal version of them is that neither of them have feelings for each other at all#neither does the player have any for noelle#the romantic/marriage connotations are there as metaphor for the stripping of autonomy through a forced heterosexual lens#however if they somehow form some fucked up forced conditioning traumabond feelings for each other along the way which fucks things up even#more… now THATS fucking interesting#really gets you questioning the lines between the decisions you make and the ones they make of their own volition#suselle completely endgame though#i just like analysing kriselle more LOL
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vaguely-concerned · 25 days ago
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ingellvar must have so many strange off-putting little personal habits in their day to day life that they don't even realize come across as weird, especially if they haven't ever dated outside of the watchers much. in rye's specific case I think lucanis has a capacity for such immaculate 'sure my life is already so fucking weird this might as well happen' energy that I believe he'd be able to roll with the punches admirably given the time, but it really would be a situation like
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(what was going on there was that rook was placing down some experimental wards, by the way, it's what he does to calm down before bed and if he wakes during the night. what with the necropolis itself being a liminal space of lf sorts on a cosmic scale, watchers take the additional liminal space between wakefulness and dreaming extremely seriously b/c they know there are things drifting through that would just love to get their foot/tentacle/conceptual spores in that particular half-ajar door that should not be allowed inside. or outside, I suppose, depending on your point of view. rook and lucanis are also experimenting with whether solid wards can help any with lucanis' weird post-spite dreams even if they can't do anything for the more mundane ptsd ones. third reason because in my worldstate they still live in the lighthouse after the game: unless gently dissuaded wisps will sometimes drift by while you're asleep and hover over your face curiously as they sense your mind doing stuff in the fade, and no one likes waking up on an eldritch sneeze with a well-meaning yet terrified wisp zooming about the room. important watcher novice 101 lessons.
blessed mental image of rye cross-legged on the floor, barefoot in his PJs with his hair down and no makeup, peaceably tracing out elaborate geometric shapes that somehow make your eyes scared when you look at them* while lucanis sits on the bed and reads out loud to both him and spite and occasionally sneaks some carnal looks at rook's fully unleashed curly hair and bare wrists & throat...... okay I think I've found the thing that will help me through the day thank you for coming on this journey with me)
*what is the paint he's using made out of and why is it such a deeply unsettling colour? don't worry about it! :) patented mostly well-meaning yet also borderline condescending mortalitasi hand wave of 'don't worry your sweet little non-nevarran head about it we both know you don't actually want to know. do not ask questions lest you learn the answers, especially if you're going to be annoying at me and freak out about it. let the things man was not meant to know stay unknown. unknown by you I mean I'm built different'
#*at myself through gritted teeth* good things or feelings are very much not happening right now but they DO exist and they are possible#I need you to take this on faith rn because I sure as fuck don't have any proof but source: just trust me i guess#think about spite wide-eyed listening to lucanis read while lucanis absently strokes rye's hair. I'm not sure if then you'll feel better#but it's worth a shot right. better track record than with anything else#dragon age#dragon age: the veilguard#oc: Ellaryen Ingellvar#lucanis dellamorte#rook x lucanis#rookanis#rye has only had one relationship with a non-watcher before and he didn't sleep over much in that one case#and also that was shitty anaxas ex-bf who liked having a pet mortalitasi but not to be reminded that said mortalitasi#was actually pretty threateningly powerful and not just an accessory for him. I don't think rye would have done much real#necromancy around him because he was in the 'pls love me love me love me I can be anything you want just don't go' mode#so he has never had to consider what his normal bedtime routine looks like to an outsider before haha#I wrote out a whole extra rookanis thing in the tags here but I'm forcing myself to make it a proper post at some point#because while I do not have the energy to examine it right now I keep writing novels in the tags because proper posts make me nervous#my brain going 'okay you can write the sincere thing. but only if you kind of hide it somewhere so it doesn't count#if I tuck it away sufficiently that means I'm not being annoying#and people won't be mad at me' (*sigh* okay what the fuck is that about. add that to the mountain of things that need unpacking#at some point you're not so tired the very thought of starting makes you nauseous)#what if everyone will think I'm stupid and cringe and pathetically earnest. on the cringe and pathetically earnest site#the only thing more unbearable than saying blorbo things in public is not getting to say blorbo things as they boil up within my skull#and I cannot seem to write fiction right now for neither love nor money so my normal outlet is clogged up#then... the power of the tag rant to make you forget yourself in the glorious rush of getting to say blorbo shit 'unperceived'.#anyway. what do you think spite would pick for them to read. that's a much happier place to rest the mind and I'd like to go there pls lol
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vynnyal · 9 months ago
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This is a pretty good point in the wip to share this, methinks :]
Map part for the hole dwelling map, starring... Not my ocs! I wanted to use ocs, but I don't have any-- so I just used the characters from a fic I was reading at the time 😂
Turns out, the symbolism was so much fun to twist into the 11 seconds I had to work with, I ended up going way more complex than I meant to. If you wanna read the fic this was based on, please do!! And tell the author I said hi! :D
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coldercreation · 2 days ago
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Happy 100 000 Hits CYE!🥹❤️
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residentialsinyomakai · 3 months ago
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You'll never guess who the kinda primary subject of this yappost/doodle dump is
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sigh. it always comes back
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Freaky ahh bowl of rice...what's he on about
"But Yōmakai isn't this a maddiman post. Why are the first two things besides the intro not ma" IM GETTING THERE. PATIENCE
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I redraw Kagemura every now and then to see if I improve!! :) Think I kinda ate w this one frfr
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No me mires con tus estupidos ojos
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UEgh. judging you btw
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Expression stuff cause I love seeing different depictions both from other people and within my own mind
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Mini thing based on a. Trend jm noticing LMAO
Also this Maddiman that scared some of my friends apparently 😔💔
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AU shenanigans and this idiot again. HATE HIM BLOW HIM UP NOW!!!! Jkjk i wish people drew him more i love him :)
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Anyways all done :) see you!!
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gammija · 1 month ago
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genuinely, it's so funny to me when jon.elias shippers hate j.mart for the specifically stated reason that "martin isnt good for jon". Yes, the guy with realistic flaws and traits that occasionally create conflicts with Jons own flaws and traits is bad for him, so jmart is toxic. Jon deserves someone who treats him right.
In fact, you know who's good for Jon? The person who effectively used him as a puppet, made a plan centered on scarring him for life 13 times and executed it without remorse, then used his body to end the world, an experience so horrifying that Jon would rather literally kill everyone on earth than risk someone else feeling it too. Now that's a guy Jon deserves!
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wilting-fl0wer · 1 month ago
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Chat it's oc time
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Let me present y'all with sketches of the two people responsible for Mia's existence
The one on the left is Mia's funky dad, Silo (Psilocybin)! He's a lazy overachiever and strato's renowned chemist (with a phd in organic chemistry)! Also besties with Geranium and his ex-plug
The one on the right is Mia's chronically bitch-faced mom, Sera (Seraphim)! An ex-soldier and the physical embodiment of "if looks could kill", she's also a stellar doctor and also worsties with instance?????? old woman yuri???????????
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opens-up-4-nobody · 2 months ago
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Charlie Kelly from Always Sunny is my favorite representation of dyslexia in anything ever. Specifically because everyone's frustration when his dyslexia gets in their way feels very true to my frustration when my dyslexia gets in my way. I like watching people get mad at dyslexia lol
#also i like how casually everyone is like yeah well charlie cant read ya kno what can u do?#and its the only dyslexia rep ive seen where its not framed as 'wah im bad at school' or 'im dyslexic but i can succeed anyway'#thr problems of dyslexia extend outside of school and continued to be a struggle even if its masked by success to the outside world#but this is from the mouth of a person who does not enjoy being represented in media. bc im like fuck off i hate u when i relate to#characters lol. or ur not writing it right fuck off. tbh it makes me feel better to watch other dyslexic ppl fuck up in the same ways i do#like on tv typically characters dont constantly fuck up the words coming out of their mouth unless somethings medically wrong with them but#thats a very dyslexic thing to do bc theres a problem with language and its translation in ur brain.#the dyslexic rep i hate the most is probably p3rcy jackson bc like i get the point of succeeding depite handicaps but i hate it and also he#has visual anomalies in the movie so extreme its probably more an eye issue rather than streight up dyslexia which is the inability to read#and that makes me feel like a dipshit bc the words arent running away and i still cant read lol. also fucking hate that they retconed sp0ck#as sorta vulcan dyslexic. mostly im just being a hater bitch bc i havent watched it but the sp0ck story is so so so fucking good bc hes#stuck between two worlds and experiencing prejudice of both sides. is that not enough for you????? fuck off. i reject u dyslexic sp0ck#but again. im a fucking hater and a contrarian so i mostly just get mad when i relate to characters#unrelated
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taraxippos · 6 months ago
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I never touched it but I feel like i only ever hear positive things said about song of achilles.. in (rough strokes at least) what makes it dogshit to you?
Okay it's been a while since I actually read it so some of this might not be spot on accurate. Sorry if at any point I say 'the book never does xyz' and it actually does once or twice but I think my underlying criticisms are accurate
-Patroclus is made into like this soft gentle tender quivering little yaoi boy. In the source text, he's shown as compassionate and moved by the suffering of his own men (and apparently having some medical skill, tending to the wounded in the camp), but very much invested n combat and very, very good at it (pages worth of descriptions of the guys he's killing left and right). In this, the arguably more complex character from this 8th century BC text is flattened into Being A Healer, he doesn't want to go to war he just wants to help people, he only goes because Achilles has to but he doesn't want to fight he's a HEALER he's a gentle lover NOT A FIGHTER who just wants to help he just wants to help everyone around him he HEALS while Achilles is a doomed warrior who is so good at fighting and KILLING its a DICHOTOMY GUYS!!!LIKE THE BEAUTIFUL SUN AND MOON DOOMED LOVERS SO SAD patocluse HEALER . (I Think he's specifically characterized as being BAD at fighting but might be misremembering)
-I don't remember much about Achilles' characterization I think it just makes him less of a jackass while not adding anything of interest and levels out into being mad boring.
-Not getting into the literal millenias old debate whether the mythological characters Achilles and Patroclus were being characterized as some type of lover by the original oral sources of the Iliad or its Homeric writers. We will never know. We don't even know what (if any) culturally accepted conventions of male homosexuality existed in bronze age Greece (we know much more about their descendants). But there are some interesting elements of their characterization in this direction, with how unconventional their relationship is WITHIN the text itself- Patroclus is described as cooking for Achilles and his guests (very specifically a woman/wife's job), Achilles chides Patroclus like a father, but there's also scene where Achilles' mourning of him directly echoes a passage of Hector's wife mourning her husband, Patroclus is explicitly stated to Achilles' elder, and is overall treated as his equal or near-equal, closest confidant and most beloved friend (to the point that pederastic classical Greeks would debate over who was erastes (older authority figure lover) and who was eromenos (adolescent 'beloved')- many took it as a given that this text depicted their present-day cultural norms of homosexual behavior but it existed so Outside of these norms that it had to be debated who was who). Their relationship is non-standard both within the text and to the descendants of the civilization that wrote them.
Basically what I'm saying is this book had opportunities to like, explore the unconventionality of the relationship (being presented here as explicitly lovers), explore the dynamics of why Patroclus wants to do 'women's work' (besides being a tenderhearted softboy), the weird dynamics where they take on paternal roles to each other but also roles of wives, how they feel about being this way, and just kind of Doesn't. Which I guess isn't an intrinsic fault (because it omits much of what I just talked about to begin with). it's just like.... Lame. This book takes jsut abandons everything interesting about the source text in favor of flattening it into bland Doomed Yaoi.
-The conflict that sets off the core story of the Iliad is Achilles and Agamemnon fighting over Briseis, an enslaved Trojan woman taken by Achilles as a war-trophy, Achilles spends most of the story moping because he was dishonored by his 'trophy' being taken. Achilles and Patroclus and everyone else are raping their captives, all the women in the story are either captured Trojans (or in the case of the free women within the walls of Troy, soon to be enslaved, and are slave owners themselves). Slavery as an institution and extreme patriarchal conventions are innate to the text and reflective of the context in which it was developed. You cannot avoid it.
But obviously you can't have your soft yaoi boys doing this, so the author has them capturing women to Protect Them from the other men. Their slaves are UNDER THEIR PROTECTION and VERY SAFE (and they might even Like And Befriend Them but I might be misremembering that. Briseis does though). Our heroes have apparently absorbed none of the ideals of the culture they exist in and the author seems to think "they're gay and aren't sexually attracted to their captives" would translate to them being outright benevolent (also as if wartime sexual violence is just about attraction and not part of a wider spectrum of violent acts to dehumanize and brutalize an accepted 'enemy')
In the source text, Briseis mourns Patroclus as being the kindest to her of her captors, who tried to get her a slightly better outcome by getting her married to Achilles (which probably would be the Least Bad of all possible outcomes for a woman in that situation, becoming a legal wife instead of a slave), and wonders what will happen to her now that he's gone. This is a really really sad, horrible, and compelling dynamic which could be fleshed out in very interesting ways but is instead is tossed entirely aside in favor of them being Besties. Like brother and sister.
All of the above pisses me off so much. If you don't want to engage in the icky parts of ancient/bronze age Greece then don't write a retelling of a story taking place in bronze age Greece. I'm not gonna get mad at children's adaptations of Greek myths or silly fun stories loosely based on them for omitting the rape and slavery but it is SO fundamental to the Iliad. If you're not willing to handle it, either fully omit it or better yet set your Iliad inspired yaoi in an invented swords-and-sandals setting where you can have all your heartbreaking tragic doomed lovers plot beats and not have to clumsily write around the women they're brutalizing.
-The author didn't seem to know what to do with Thetis and she made her just like, Achilles bitch mother who spends most of the story trying to separate our Yaoi Boys (iirc her disguising Achilles as a girl and hiding him on Scyros is made to be more about getting him away from Patroclus than trying to save her son from his prophesied doom in the Trojan War) until she sees how much they loooove each other and I think helps Patroclus' spirit get to the afterlife or something in the end?
-This is more of a personal taste gripe but it has that writing style I loathe where the prose feels less like a story and more like an attempt to string together Deep Beautiful Hard Hitting Poetic Lines that will look great as excerpts on booktok (might predate booktok but same vibe). It's all very Pretty and Haunting and Deep but feels devoid of real substance.
I really like The Iliad and The Odyssey in of themselves. They're fascinating historical texts that give a window into how 8th century BC Greeks told their stories, saw their world, interpreted their ancestors, etc. And genuinely I think these texts have 'good' characters, there's a lot of complexity and humanity to it.
WRT the Iliad- all of the main Achaeans are pretty fascinating, the one singular part where Briseis Gets To Talk and laments her situation is great, Achilles fantasizing that all of the Trojans AND the Achaeans die so he and Patroclus alone can have the glory of conquering Troy (wild), Achilles asking to embrace Patroclus' shade and reaching out for him but it's immaterial (and the shade being sucked back underground with a 'squeak' (the squeak kinda gets me it's disturbing and sad)), Hecuba talking about wanting to tear out Achilles' liver and eat it in a (taboo, exceptioally pointed) expression of rage and grief for his mutilation of her son's corpse, just one tiny line where the enslaved women performing ritual wailing for their dead captors are described as using it as an outlet to 'grieve for their own troubles' is heartrending, etc. A lot of grappling with anger and grief and the inevitability of death, a lot of groundwork laid for characters that could be very interesting when expanded upon in the framework of a conventional novel.
And Song Of Achilles really doesn't do much with all that. I know a lot of my gripes here are kind of just "It's different from the Iliad", I would have thought of it as mostly mediocre and forgettable rather than infuriating if it wasn't a retelling (and I DEFINITELY have strong biases here). But I think the ways in which it is different are less just a product of a retelling (of course there's going to be omissions and differences) and more a complete and utter disinterest in vast majority of its own subject matter, to the book's detriment. I think a retelling has a point when it EXPANDS on the source, or provides a NEW ANGLE to the source. This book doesn't Really do either, it just shaves off the complexity of its source material, renders the characters into a really boring archetype of a gay relationship, and gives very little else. Its content boils down to a middling tragic romance that has been inserted into the hollowed out defleshed skeleton of the Iliad.
Bottom line: I definitely would not be as mad about it if I wasn't familiar with the source material but I think it's fair to expect a retelling to Engage with/expand on its source, and I also think it's weak purely on its own merits. This book was set up to disappoint Me specifically.
#Sorry this turned into a 100000 word essay on The Iliad it can't be helped#I read Circe by the same author and thought it was like.. better? Definitely not great just less aggravating and kind of boring#Just rote 'you heard about this villainous woman from a Greek myth... Here's the REAL story' shit#It did have a few things I thought were good I remember it starting kind of strong and then just going limp for the remaining duration#I think part of it is that in that case she's expanding on a figure that Didn't have a whole lot of characterization in the source so#like. She had to actually Expand The Character#Again Silence of the Girls is the only Greek Mythology Retelling I have like....positive?.leaning positive? feelings towards#I've got BIG issues with it too but it does pretty much the exact opposite of everything I'm mad at SOA for and in some very#compelling ways (it's just that the author seems way more interested in Achilles and Patroclus than The Main Character Briseis#to the point of randomly starting to have Achilles POV interjections (which I thought were Good in of themselves but#really really really really really really really didn't need to be there) and then get kind of lampshaded by Briseis narrating 'I guess I#was trapped in Achilles' story the whole time lol!!!!!!')#It undermines the book on both a thematic level and just like. a construction level like it's real sloppy at times.#Also the Briseis POV sometimes has these like really out of place Author Mouthpiece Moments where she's very obviously#Stating The Point to the audience and it's like yeah we get it. We get it.#Wow in the scene were our mostly silent enslaved protagonist removes the gag from the mouth of a dead sacrificed girl as a#small but significant act of defiance and grieving in a book called 'Silence of the Girls' you inserted an ironic repeat of the line#'silence befits a woman'. in italics even. Thanks for that. I could not possibly have grasped the meaning of this scene if you didn't#spell it out for me like that. Thank you.#Actually hang on the only Greek mythology retelling I have unequivocally positive feelings for are the 'Minotaur Forgiving'#songs on 'This One's For The Dancer And This One's For The Dancer's Bouquet'. Fully love it. Like not just as songs I think it#does function well as a narrative and engages with and expands on the source in really beautiful and creative ways
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ishizzle · 4 months ago
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I have eyes and ears ok I SEE Davrin and I HEAR Lucanis
But mama I am a monster fucker
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xavalav · 17 days ago
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explodes forever and ever as i think abt dnd session from tonight. we beefed it so hard and now my freak is having a mental breakdown.
#long stort short: athy exploded the prison keeping another party member’s patron trapped and now he’s out to fucking Get Us#but the mental breakdown thing is moreso related to athy being Livid at said party member for trying to give an all powerful time gauntlet-#to his patron after athy begged and pleaded and made him promise not to#he pissed bc. why would you give the all powerful tome gauntlet to your fuckass patron do you want the world to end????#but he’s also pissed bc. that’s his friend. he was explicitly told his friend would die if he made contact with the gauntlet#and here his friend was trying to hand it off to his patron!! that fucker!!!!#his fury comes from the fact that his friend did not value his life and broke his promise#and even deeper than that! athy’s upset because he ‘knows’ that he is going to sacrifice himself to save everyone#he was told that he is a fragment of the god devourer that has been hunting him and that is the source of his power#and that if he dies along with it. it will be destroyed for good#he also is seeing the cracks in his ‘family’ and their worship and finding out many things he believed previously were lies#but. in his hypocritical mind. he’s upset that he friend would put himself in danger like that when he was right there willing to step in#he /wants/ to sacrifice himself to savs his friends. it’s the only life goal he’s ever known as it’s been hammered into him since childhood#and it’s the only way he knows how to express that his friends are like family to him. he doesn’t know anything other than dying for love#i wish i could say he has better things in store for him but uh. he doesn’t even know he used to be human lol#this game has been building up to his mental breakdown ever since he started getting hunted by that fuckass cat#and his breakdown isn’t gonna stop here!! buddy still has more fucked up evil secrets to uncover#i love him. my freak. my shayla.#anyways. thanks for reading the shortened Yappening i had planned. if you wanna see more feel free to ask. i love talking abt him#might do some sketches of him tomorrow. i wanna draw him so bad rn#xav shouts into da void
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