#ill kiss you on the mouth

[orangechickenpillow]

In my mind, whenever Karlach and Astarion are like sitting or lounging around, Astarion sits right between Karlach's legs. Like you know, she does her man spread and props her arms on her knees and Astarion sits between her legs, leaning back on her chest and judges everyone hardcore while Karlach is behind him just loving every minute of it like :3

I think he'd like it because she's so warm (and i feel like he's always cold), and it's also a way for him to get physical touch in a relatively non-intimate way. And Karlach's just happy when anyone touches her at all -- he could probably punch her in the gut and she'd call him adorable ("Please, I would never" he'd insist and Gale would be like "Yeah because you're likely to break your hand" and again Karlach's just like :3)

So Astarion sits between her legs and very aggresively judges people while she smiles and makes jokes and chats it up. It's like when really pretty girls have those giant attack dogs -- except you know the dog probably has like a duck stuffie that it sleeps with and is just being scary for appearances (*ahem* Astarion)

But there's just one problem, and it's that whenever Karlach gets excited (which is often) her first instinct is to squeeze the thing directly in front of her. If she gets excited and Astarion is in her lap, it's like a saw trap going off -- you can only see his limbs poking out as she practically tackles him, and everyone at camp is yelling in horror because You've got the Tiny Man, remember!!! and your thighs are about to crack his skull like a watermelon!!!

So everyone's made it a point to not say anything Exciting to Karlach when Astarion takes up his position on the lap of his own personal heater (and, fine, *maybe* friend) that way she doesn't accidentally kill him ("I would never" she'd insist, and Shadowheart would be like "Babes, you almost did")

[something-rlse]

guys please help I've been looking for this fic yet I can't seem to find it it's about Max getting a motorhome for races and hanging out with the other drivers who have motorhomes and the only things I remember is that it's lestappen and daniel riccardo blasts music at 6 am also I think seb is there

[stervrucht]

[lucabyte]

Yeah, that about sums it up.

[yb-cringe]

what im hoping for arkanis is that if theres enough buzz there can be dedicated archivers who post vods on youtube because auto gen captions are way better than nothing

as much as youtubes auto translator for captions kinda sucks it does wonders for having like Zero knowledge of whats going on. thats how i started watching roiers pov likr last year. i just found a youtube vod and slapped on the captions button and prayed. and it kinda worked.

[strawberri-draws]

I just want to make my screen read my online text book out loud to me because my eyes hurt and I'm tired, and they have the audacity to make them all pdf images specifically so people can't "copy text" (so my computer won't recognize it as text and read it for me) and won't let me change it and I can't figure it out so I'll just have to. struggle

[poughkeepsies]

don't even need buddie canon just keep giving me them coparenting and having meaningful storylines every episode

[susieandhobbes]

The SydCarmy backlash is so Boring

It's many other things besides, but primarily, it's so fucking BORING.

There's a very specific kind of irrational anger that comes with ships featuring a Black women x a leading white boy of the month and every sorry excuse for why it's definitely not racist is so played out

"What's wrong with a platonic friendship between men and women?! We need more non-romantic representation"

Yawn

"There just isn't any chemistry"

Cliche

"I just think she's too good for him actually. She's so strong/independent/amazing, she deserves better"

mhm if you say so

"What if she/he were gay instead? I think this would be a great time for more LGBT rep :)"

Yep, convenient

"It's definitely not a race thing because I ship her with this white person!" (A side character who is either a derivative of the lead, poorly written, or has minimal screentime)

Oh indeed

"I ship her with this Black person!" (Often times the only other Black person in the show or movie, no matter how little they interact or how little interest she has in him, in a violent case of "pair the spares")

Sigh

I can pick any popular swirl ship dating back to fucking 10 and Martha in 2007 and find 50-11 variations of the same excuses. Truly, I'd rather y'all just say you don't want Black women's hands on your fav white men but I'm pretty sure like 85-95% of the people aren't even self-aware enough to realize that that is their issue. So until then, can we at least switch up the damn script?

[nateezfics]

does anyone else constantly think about smeared lipstick paradigm hongjoong or is it just me.

[svturnvl]

he is babygirl to ME.........

[shhhhimwatchingthis]

Watcher truly burnt through their audience's good will and tainted their brand with that 'goodbye YouTube' thing. We know this, obviously, the immediate aftermath was swift and unanimously negative. But wow, are the effects still being seen.

I just found out the new ghost files season premiered two days ago and I have seen no one talking about it on this site.

Shane and Ryan visit a haunted site where a ghost named Big Dick Tom is known for sticking his finger in peoples butts and they on camera ask for their soft little holes to be fucked to prove the existence of ghosts

AND NOTHING

one of the spirit boxes says the word Knot and I have not seen a single meme about it. On the werewolf fucker site!

another spirit box tells them to beg and after a pause they in sync go yeah. OK. Sure. And crickets. On the kink site?

I dunno maybe they'll earn people's trust again, but it is Wild and kind of sad to see such clear decline in fan enthusiasm

audience decline can happen for loads of reasons, usually quality decay or cast/creative changes. People have noted they've been enjoying the watcher iteration of the show less than ye olde buzzfeed days but they were still watching anyway!

this their BIG IP. but its (comparatively) dead in the water.

the question is

who's watching watcher?

[the-woman-upstairs]

Armand on a post-divorce bender while Daniel is partying it up on tour with Lestat

[pillarofna]

EMERGENCY COMMISSIONS OPEN!

hi, i'm dylan, trans, disabled, and unemployed. i’m incredibly in need of any help i can get right now so i’m taking commissions to help me out.

im willing to draw (some) nsfw, no fetish art, no mecha or complex backgrounds. additional people or complex designs will cost extra. can take up to 2 months to complete your request but i’ll try to get it done within two weeks if possible.

check out my art blog @dirkcomplex and send me a DM if youre interested! thanks so much :)

5 slots available as of 8/7/24

[fizz-pop-thwip]

male reader fics when I catch you male reader fics.. male reader fics when I catch you male reader fics.. male reader fics when I catch you male reader fics..

[ledzeppelinmixtape]

wish house was a real doctor so i could be his mystery insomniac patient and after giving me horse tranquilizers and still not falling asleep he just hits me in the head with his cane and im out like a light

[finnitesimal]

Every panel of her so far.... women who are cheats and swindlers and liars and thieves MY DMS ARE OPEN...........